The L Word 1x13

1. LOOK, WHEN I SAY

2. I'VE BEEN WITH PEOPLE,

3. I DON'T MEAN 20 OR 30.

4. OKAY, SO WHAT,

5. LIKE, HUNDREDS, THOUSANDS?

6. WHAT?

7. SOMEWHERE

8. BETWEEN...

9. 950 AND 1,200

10. SINCE I WAS 14.

11. WHOA.

12. WELL, WHATEVER, YOU KNOW,

13. IT DOESN'T MATTER.

14. I DON'T CARE.

15. I TURNED TRICKS ON SANTA MONICA

16. WITH MY FRIEND CLIVE,

17. AND ALL THESE GUYS THOUGHT

18. I WAS SOME LITTLE STREET FAG,

19. AND I COULD'VE BEEN KILLED.

20. THAT'S SO COOL

21. WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT,

22. RIGHT?

23. CLEA, IT'S NOT COOL.

24. LISTEN,

25. I LIKE YOU,

26. BUT WHAT YOU WANT FROM ME

27. ISN'T GOING TO HAPPEN.

28. OKAY, YOU KNOW,

29. I KNOW, IT'S BECAUSE

30. OF MY FATHER, RIGHT?

31. YOU GUYS, YOU HAVE

32. THIS BUSINESS TOGETHER.

33. CLEA, I'M INVOLVED WITH SOMEONE.

34. OH.

35. ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH HER?

36. YEAH...

37. I AM.

38. HEY, GIRL.

39. HEY, YOU OKAY?

40. NO.

41. HEY, YOU HANG IN THERE.

42. SHE'LL BE BACK

43. BEFORE YOU KNOW IT.

44. I HOPE NOT.

45. WHOA.

46. OKAY, WELL, YOU FINALLY SAID IT.

47. CAN I SAY WHAT IT IS NOW, HMM?

48. YOU DESERVE

49. TO BE HAPPY.

50. YOUR HAPPINESS

51. IS JUST AS IMPORTANT

52. AS ANYBODY ELSE'S.

53. COME ON, THE PLANET IS YOURS.

54. IF YOU AND FRANCESCA

55. ARE SPLITTING UP,

56. SHE'S NOT GOING TO

57. TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU.

58. YES, SHE IS.

59. AT BEST,

60. SHE WANTS TO BE BOUGHT OUT.

61. I SAT UP ALL NIGHT

62. TRYING TO FIGURE OUT

63. HOW I CAN COME UP

64. WITH THAT MUCH MONEY.

65. THAT'S A LOT OF MONEY.

66. I WORK SO HARD.

67. WHERE'S TRISH?

68. I DECIDED TO COOL IT

69. FOR A WHILE.

70. OH, YEAH?

71. MM-HMM.

72. HMM.

73. WHY?

74. I WAS ACCEPTED AT THE G.S.I.E.

75. I'M FINALLY GETTING

76. MY TEACHING DEGREE.

77. WOW, THAT'S... THAT'S AMAZING.

78. YEAH,

79. SO WHEN I SWITCH DEPARTMENTS,

80. TRISH AND I

81. CAN SEE ONE ANOTHER AGAIN

82. IF WE STILL WANT TO.

83. DID SHE CRY

84. WHEN YOU TOLD HER

85. YOU HAD TO BREAK UP WITH HER?

86. YEAH, SHE DID.

87. YEAH.

88. HOW'S YOUR WRITING?

89. IT'S GOOD.

90. I'M ACTUALLY...

91. WORKING ON A STORY

92. RIGHT NOW

93. ABOUT A WOMAN

94. THAT'S BEEN MUTE

95. FROM BIRTH,

96. AND THEN

97. SHE DISCOVERS

98. THAT SHE'S ABLE TO SPEAK

99. THE LANGUAGE OF MANATEES.

100. ALL RIGHT.

101. ALL RIGHT, GIVE IT UP,

102. LET'S HAVE SOME LOVE FOR—

103. THAT WAS PHIL MCCULKIN.

104. ALL RIGHT,

105. NOW FOR OUR FINAL

106. KING OF THE NIGHT,

107. LET'S GIVE A GOOD, HOT WELCOME

108. TO IVAN AYCOCK.

109. ALL RIGHT, SHAKE IT, BABY!

110. WHOO!

111. HEY, ISN'T THAT ROBIN, THAT

112. GIRL JENNY'S GOING OUT WITH?

113. RIGHT THERE?

114. OH, YEAH, IT IS.

115. WHOO!

116. I HAVE A DATE

117. ON WEDNESDAY NIGHT.

118. ANYONE I KNOW?

119. UM... NO.

120. HER NAME IS ROBIN,

121. AND I MET HER AT PALM SPRINGS

122. WHEN I...

123. YOU KNOW, WHEN I WENT WITH TINA

124. AND ALL OF THEM.

125. AND YOU'RE TELLING ME THIS

126. BECAUSE...

127. WELL, BECAUSE YOU KNOW

128. THAT I CAN'T AFFORD RESTAURANTS

129. RIGHT NOW.

130. LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT.

131. YOU'RE ASKING

132. TO BORROW MONEY FROM ME

133. FOR A DATE

134. BECAUSE I'VE GOT

135. TO TELL YOU—

136. NO, I WASN'T,

137. I WAS ASKING YOU IF IT'S OKAY

138. IF I HAD HER

139. AT MY PLACE.

140. I WAS GOING TO MAKE

141. A SALAD NICOISE.

142. WEDNESDAY'S

143. BASKETBALL AND BEER

144. NIGHT,

145. SO I'M NOT GOING TO BE HOME

146. TILL LATE.

147. IF YOU WANT,

148. YOU CAN USE THE KITCHEN,

149. MAKE YOUR SALAD.

150. HEY, HEY.

151. HELLO.

152. HOW'S EVERYTHING?

153. I'VE HEARD ABOUT YOU.

154. SHANE.

155. WHAT?

156. CHECK IT OUT.

157. HOW ABOUT...

158. SHIT. THAT SUCKS.

159. WELL, DO YOU THINK—

160. DO YOU THINK SHE THOUGHT

161. WHEN I SAID...

162. LIKE, WHEN I POINTED HER OUT,

163. THAT I DIDN'T—

164. NO.

165. THAT IS SO... WRONG.

166. YEP.

167. HEY, IVAN.

168. OH, HEY.

169. THIS WAS

170. ONE OF THE BEST NIGHTS OF MUSIC

171. I HAVE EVER HAD.

172. I MEAN...

173. AND THANK YOU FOR ORGANIZING

174. "THE KINGS

175. OF THE NIGHT."

176. IT WAS THE BOMB.

177. THE PLEASURE WAS ALL MINE.

178. HEY, WHY DON'T YOU

179. MAKE ROOM

180. FOR THE LADY?

181. WHAT CAN I

182. GET YOU, KIT?

183. UM... OH, NOTHING.

184. I'M FINE.

185. WELL, WHAT'S YOUR DRINK?

186. I MEAN, A PINK LADY,

187. CAJUN MARTINI,

188. MAYBE A SIMPLE WHISKEY SODA?

189. I'M KEEPING DRY THESE DAYS.

190. WELL, THAT'S A FINE THING

191. FOR A BEAUTIFUL LADY.

192. YOU IN THE PROGRAM?

193. YEAH, I AM.

194. 11 YEARS NEXT MONTH.

195. CONGRATULATIONS.

196. I'M...

197. 37 DAYS.

198. 37 DAYS IS A LIFETIME.

199. LOOK,

200. IF YOU EVER NEED

201. ANYONE TO TALK TO,

202. OR FOR ANY OTHER REASON...

203. GIVE ME A CALL, OKAY?

204. THANKS.

205. WHOA.

206. YOU'RE NOT LEAVING

207. ALREADY, ARE YOU?

208. OSCAR AND I ARE DUE IN COURT

209. AT 8:15.

210. ARTHUR CROFT

211. AGREED

212. TO REPRESENT US PRO BONO

213. AGAINST CLAY PATTERSON.

214. WOW, DID YOU—DID YOU LAND

215. ARTHUR CROFT?

216. UH-HUH. REMEMBER?

217. I MET HIM WHEN WARNERS GOT SUED

218. OVER THAT SCRIPT I DEVELOPED?

219. WOW, TINA.

220. OSCAR MUST JUST BE

221. BESIDE HIMSELF.

222. YEAH, AND THEN,

223. AFTER WE'RE FINISHED IN COURT,

224. I HAVE A MEETING

225. WITH THESE JUNIOR HIGH

226. STUDENTS

227. FROM SOUTH CENTRAL.

228. WE'RE STARTING

229. AN ORGANIC FOOD CO-OP

230. AT THEIR SCHOOL.

231. ISN'T THAT COOL?

232. WELL, YEAH, THAT—

233. THAT'S GREAT.

234. UM, OH, WAIT, THE...

235. MY JIL SANDER SUIT,

236. DO YOU KNOW?

237. DO YOU HAVE

238. ANY IDEA?

239. UM, I THINK

240. IT'S AT THE DRY CLEANERS.

241. I...

242. I DROPPED IT OFF

243. LAST WEEK.

244. OH, GREAT, THEN YOU COULD

245. PICK IT UP TODAY, THEN?

246. UH-UH, I...

247. CAN YOU GET JAMES TO DO IT?

248. I'M HAVING

249. A REALLY BUSY WEEK.

250. OKAY?

251. BYE.

252. SO OKAY, SO HE GETS

253. HIS PREDNISONE

254. AT 11:00 AND 2:00,

255. AND IF FOR SOME REASON

256. I'M NOT HOME BY 5:00,

257. JUST GO AHEAD AND GIVE HIM

258. HIS LIQUID

259. THYROID MEDICINE.

260. IT COMES

261. IN THREE FLAVORS,

262. CHICKEN, TUNA,

263. AND SARDINE,

264. SO, YOU KNOW, JUST SEE

265. WHAT HE'S IN THE MOOD FOR.

266. OKAY.

267. BYE, BABY.

268. BYE.

269. THANK YOU.

270. BYE, SWEETIE

271. PIDDLY PIE.

272. TON-TON'S

273. GOING TO TAKE

274. EXTRA SPECIAL CARE

275. OF YOU,

276. MY HANDSOME, LOVER BOY,

277. PUSS POT.

278. OH, YES, OH, YES.

279. OH, YES.

280. OKAY.

281. BYE.

282. BYE.

283. DEB. IT'S TONYA.

284. YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE

285. WHERE I AM RIGHT NOW.

286. WE'RE READY TO INSTALL

287. IN THE MAIN GALLERIES,

288. BUT I WANT YOU TO KEEP

289. THE ANISH KAPOOR CRATED

290. UNTIL OUR TECHNICIAN

291. ARRIVES.

292. YEAH.

293. BETTE.

294. HOLD ON.

295. I THINK YOU SHOULD COME DOWN

296. AND SEE WHAT'S GOING ON

297. OUT HERE.

298. I'LL CALL YOU BACK.

299. WHAT?

300. WE HAVE PROTESTERS

301. SETTING UP OUTSIDE.

302. MA'AM,

303. YOU DON'T WANT TO GO IN THERE.

304. YES, I DO.

305. ARE YOU AWARE

306. THAT THIS SO-CALLED MUSEUM

307. IS RUN BY HOMOSEXUAL

308. PORNOGRAPHERS?

309. ARE YOU

310. A HOMOSEXUAL PORNOGRAPHER?

311. GET OUT OF MY FACE, SLIMEBALL.

312. THE CAC SHOULD BE SHUT DOWN,

313. AND THE PEOPLE INSIDE

314. LOCKED AWAY!

315. YEAH!

316. YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT!

317. HAVE YOU SEEN IT OUT THERE?

318. YEAH,

319. ONE OF THEM TRIED TO BLOCK ME

320. FROM COMING IN THE MUSEUM.

321. ARE YOU OKAY?

322. YEAH, I'M FINE.

323. I HAVE MOVERS DUE

324. WITH A SHIPMENT OF ARTWORK

325. IN 40 MINUTES,

326. I HAVE FIVE ARTISTS

327. ARRIVING

328. TO DO

329. INSTALLATION WORK,

330. AND I HAVE A BUNCH OF LUNATICS

331. OUT IN THE COURTYARD

332. WHO APPARENTLY WANT TO SEE ME

333. TARRED AND FEATHERED...

334. BUT THE MAIN GALLERY

335. LOOKS GREAT.

336. WELL, WE'RE NEARLY FINISHED.

337. HERE, LET ME SHOW YOU

338. SOME DRAWINGS

339. OF THE SHOJI SCREENS.

340. OKAY.

341. SO...

342. FUCK.

343. I'M SORRY, I...

344. WHAT HAPPENED THE OTHER NIGHT

345. CANNOT HAPPEN AGAIN.

346. YOU UNDERSTAND?

347. UM... OKAY,

348. THIS IS NOT

349. A BEARING WALL,

350. SO I FIGURED WE'D JUST ERECT

351. THE SCAFFOLDING HERE,

352. AND...

353. BETTE, THEY HAVE ALMOST

354. A HUNDRED PEOPLE

355. OUT THERE.

356. THEY'RE THREATENING

357. TO NOT LET THE ARTWORK

358. INTO THE MUSEUM.

359. JESUS.

360. WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO?

361. SHOULD WE CALL THE POLICE?

362. THE POLICE ARE HERE,

363. BUT THEY'RE NOT GOING

364. TO HELP YOU.

365. THESE PROTESTERS

366. HAVE A PERMIT.

367. WHAT ABOUT THE ALLEY?

368. CAN'T WE TAKE THE TRUCKS

369. OUT BACK

370. AND LOAD IN

371. FROM THERE?

372. NO, NO, NO,

373. THEY'RE BLOCKING THAT, TOO.

374. THIS IS CRAZY.

375. I DON'T HAVE TIME TO RESCHEDULE,

376. AND I'M NOT GOING TO BACK DOWN

377. FROM THESE LUNATICS.

378. HAVE YOU EVER DONE

379. CLINIC DEFENSE?

380. ABORTION CLINICS?

381. NO, I HAVEN'T,

382. I'VE JUST WRITTEN CHECKS.

383. WELL, WHEN

384. WE USED TO DO

385. CLINIC DEFENSE,

386. THERE'D BE, I DON'T KNOW,

387. 40, 50, 60 OF THEM

388. TO EVERY 20 OF US,

389. AND SO WE FIGURED

390. THE ONLY WAY

391. TO GET A CLIENT

392. PAST THEM...

393. WELL, WE WOULD

394. LINK ARMS

395. AND FORM A COLUMN

396. TO THE STREET.

397. THEN THE CLIENT

398. WOULD GET OUT

399. OF HER CAR.

400. SHE'D BE IMMEDIATELY

401. INSIDE OF OUR COLUMN,

402. AND THEN WE'D GET HER

403. SAFELY INSIDE.

404. LIKE A HUMAN SHIELD.

405. YEAH.

406. AND HOW MANY PEOPLE DOES IT TAKE

407. TO DO SOMETHING

408. LIKE THAT?

409. AS MANY AS POSSIBLE.

410. ALL RIGHT, JAMES, I WANT YOU

411. TO ASK EVERYONE IN THE OFFICE.

412. I THINK WE HAVE ABOUT 25 PEOPLE.

413. OKAY?

414. AND LET'S GET ON THE PHONE.

415. I WANT YOU TO CALL ALL

416. THE ARTISTS THAT ARE IN TOWN.

417. I WANT YOU TO CALL YOUR FRIENDS.

418. WE NEED BODIES.

419. OKAY.

420. WINE?

421. I HAVE TO GET BACK TO WORK.

422. I HAVE A CLASS OF 10-YEAR-OLDS

423. ASPIRING TO BE

424. TIGHTROPE WALKERS.

425. OH, DON'T WORRY,

426. WE'LL HAVE IT TONIGHT.

427. GRAZIE.

428. OH, ACTUALLY,

429. I... I CAN'T DO THAT EITHER.

430. I ALREADY HAVE PLANS.

431. WHAT KIND OF PLANS?

432. OR IS THAT A SECRET? OH.

433. NO, IT'S NOT A SECRET.

434. NO, YOU SHOULD

435. NEVER TELL

436. SECRETS,

437. NEVER.

438. TELL ME

439. SOMETHING ELSE.

440. DO YOU LIKE TO READ?

441. UM, I GUESS,

442. WHEN I... WHEN I HAVE TIME.

443. I'M NOT EXACTLY A BIG READER.

444. HAVE YOU EVER READ

445. ANYTHING

446. BY ANNE CARSON?

447. UM, I DON'T THINK SO.

448. DOES SHE WRITE NOVELS, OR...

449. I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU A BOOK.

450. YOU CAN TAKE IT WITH YOU

451. WHEN YOU RUN AWAY

452. WITH THE CIRCUS.

453. IT'S CALLED EROS

454. THE BITTERSWEET.

455. IT'S VERY ROMANTIC.

456. MISS PORTER.

457. WITH ALL

458. THE CONTROVERSY,

459. IS THE CAC

460. STILL GOING AHEAD

461. WITH THE PROVOCATION

462. SHOW?

463. WITHOUT

464. THE SLIGHTEST HESITATION.

465. I NOTICE FAE BUCKLEY

466. ISN'T HERE.

467. DO YOU KNOW

468. WHERE SHE IS?

469. I HAVE NO IDEA.

470. DID YOU RUIN HER

471. BY EXPOSING

472. HER FAMILY TRAGEDY?

473. DID YOU GO TOO FAR?

474. I HAVE TO GO. EXCUSE ME.

475. LINK ARMS,

476. MOVE AROUND TO THE LEFT,

477. LINK ARMS.

478. YOU ARE OBSTRUCTING

479. COMMERCE.

480. IF YOU DO NOT LET

481. THESE MOVERS THROUGH,

482. YOU'LL BE VIOLATING THE LAW.

483. TELL THEM NO.

484. FILTH AS ART HAS GOT TO GO.

485. SHUT THEM DOWN. TELL THEM NO.

486. FILTH AS ART HAS GOT TO GO.

487. MY GOD,

488. IT'S A FULL-SCALE WAR.

489. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING.

490. LOOK, BETTE,

491. DANA'S COMING, TOO.

492. WHERE'S TINA?

493. I DON'T KNOW.

494. I LEFT WORD FOR HER.

495. SHE AND OSCAR

496. WERE SUPPOSED TO BE IN COURT

497. EARLIER THIS MORNING.

498. I CAN'T GET THROUGH.

499. FILTH AS ART HAS GOT TO GO.

500. SHUT THEM DOWN. TELL THEM NO.

501. FILTH AS ART HAS GOT TO GO.

502. HEY.

503. SO COME BY AFTER WORK.

504. I'LL HAVE THE BOOK FOR YOU.

505. OH, YOU KNOW WHAT?

506. I'LL JUST COME BY

507. TOMORROW.

508. NO, I WON'T KEEP YOU LONG,

509. JUST COME BY LATER.

510. OKAY, FINE.

511. YOU'RE

512. VERY PERSISTENT.

513. AH, PERSISTANCE, C'EST LA MERE

514. DE TOUS LES SUCCES.

515. I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

516. HEY.

517. HEY, MARINA.

518. UM, MARINA,

519. REMEMBER WHEN WE TALKED

520. ABOUT KIND OF A PLAN?

521. WELL, WE ARE GOING

522. TO FIND YOU

523. SOME PARTNERS,

524. AND WE'RE GOING

525. TO RAISE SOME MONEY,

526. AND YOU ARE GOING

527. TO BUY FRANCESCA OUT.

528. WELL, WHAT ABOUT YOU?

529. YOU COULD BE MY PARTNER.

530. I...

531. OKAY, WELL,

532. MAYBE WHEN SOME OF MY ROYALTIES

533. COME IN.

534. YOU KNOW,

535. I HAVEN'T SEEN ONE CENT

536. FROM THAT SLIM DADDY SONG.

537. WHAT ABOUT BETTE?

538. SHE COULD LEND YOU THE MONEY.

539. OH, UH-UH-UH.

540. I MEAN, COME ON,

541. YOU'RE GOOD FOR IT.

542. I DON'T KNOW.

543. I'M ON MY WAY OVER THERE NOW

544. AS SOON AS IVAN GETS HERE, SO—

545. IVAN?

546. IVAN IS

547. RIGHT OVER THERE.

548. OH... YEAH, RIGHT.

549. UM, HEY.

550. HEY.

551. IVAN,

552. HOW YOU DOING?

553. ALWAYS GOOD.

554. OKAY.

555. UH, YEAH, SHOULD WE—

556. WE'D BETTER GET GOING,

557. I GUESS.

558. YEAH, LET'S GO.

559. HEY, GIRL,

560. I'LL CATCH YOU LATER, OKAY?

561. YEAH, HAVE A GREAT TIME.

562. DON'T FORGET TO ASK BETTE.

563. WHERE'S TINA?

564. WHICH GODLESS

565. PIECE OF FILTH IS THAT?

566. WHICH RELIC

567. OF SATAN?

568. WHICH AFFRONT TO DECENCY?

569. BACK OFF.

570. YOU'RE GETTING

571. TOO CLOSE.

572. YOU HEARD HER.

573. SHE SAID, BACK OFF.

574. DON'T LET HIM

575. TOUCH IT!

576. GET OFF OF ME!

577. THAT'S THE ONE. GET HER.

578. SHE MADE A VIDEO

579. OF HERSELF

580. BEING SODOMIZED

581. BY JESUS CHRIST.

582. SHE'S ON HER KNEES, NAKED,

583. WITH CHRIST COMMITTING

584. UNSPEAKABLE ACTS ON HER.

585. HOLY SHIT.

586. WHOA, HEY, HEY, HEY.

587. I'VE GOT TO HELP HER!

588. HEY, YOU HAVE A D.U.I.

589. YOU GO GET YOURSELF ARRESTED,

590. IT'LL BE YEARS

591. BEFORE YOU GET A LICENSE AGAIN,

592. ALL RIGHT?

593. ANYWAY, THAT'S YOUR SISTER

594. RIGHT THERE,

595. ISN'T IT? HUH?

596. YEAH.

597. KIT, COME ON.

598. SHE NEEDS YOU

599. ON THE OUTSIDE.

600. YOU CAN'T DO

601. ANYTHING HERE.

602. BETTE, BETTE,

603. IS THIS YOUR FIRST ARREST?

604. HOW WILL YOU

605. PLEAD?

606. COME ON. IT'S OKAY.

607. LET'S GO.

608. NO, I...

609. OW. GOD.

610. OH, GOD,

611. I'M GOING TO DIE

612. IF MY PARENTS

613. FIND OUT ABOUT THIS.

614. WELL, LOOK AT THE UPSIDE.

615. NOW BEING A DYKE

616. WON'T BE A BIG DEAL.

617. THIS IS ABSURD.

618. YOU'LL BE HEARING FROM MY—

619. HEY, GOOD-LOOKING.

620. REMOVE YOUR SHOES

621. AND ANY

622. HARD OBJECTS,

623. INCLUDING COMBS,

624. HAIRPINS,

625. ALL WATCHES...

626. AND CELL PHONES.

627. OH, BOY.

628. NO, THAT'S LIKE

629. TAKING HER LIFE SUPPORT AWAY.

630. YOU CAN'T DO THAT.

631. JUST LET IT GO,

632. SHANE.

633. IT'S OKAY.

634. TAKE THE

635. FUCKING PHONE.

636. DON'T LOSE THAT.

637. I'LL ALSO NEED

638. ALL YOUR JEWELRY...

639. AND YOUR EYEGLASSES.

640. THE WHALE SWAM CLOSE TO HER...

641. MAKING ODD

642. CLICK-LIKE SOUNDS.

643. UNTIL THIS MOMENT,

644. HER IMAGINATION

645. HAD BEEN ENOUGH.

646. SHE UNDERSTOOD IT HAD TO BE

647. THE CORE OF DESIRE...

648. YOLANDA, HEY, IT'S CANDACE.

649. LISTEN, I'M IN A LITTLE BIT

650. OF TROUBLE HERE.

651. FUCK, TINA,

652. I KNOW YOU'RE REAL BUSY

653. SAVING THE WORLD AND EVERYTHING,

654. BUT I NEED YOU TO START

655. ANSWERING YOUR PHONE.

656. HEY, CHERIE, IT'S ME.

657. LOOK,

658. I'M GOING TO BE A LITTLE LATE

659. FOR OUR DATE TONIGHT.

660. IS HE GETTING HIS MEDICINE?

661. IS HE LISTLESS?

662. HAS HE HAD A POO?

663. ALICE, IT'S MOM.

664. CAN YOU DROP MY HEAD SHOTS

665. BY MY AGENT'S?

666. WHY ARE WE BEING HELD

667. SEPARATELY?

668. BECAUSE

669. YOU'RE HIGH RISK.

670. DANGEROUS

671. RINGLEADERS.

672. AREN'T YOU GOING TO SIT DOWN?

673. I CAN'T.

674. WHY?

675. I CAN'T SIT NEAR YOU.

676. WHAT IF YOU STAY

677. ON ONE SIDE OF THE COT?

678. I'LL STAY ON THE OTHER.

679. WE'LL DRAW AN IMAGINARY LINE

680. DOWN THE MIDDLE.

681. I DON'T THINK

682. THAT'S GOING TO WORK FOR ME.

683. I AM IN SO MUCH TROUBLE.

684. DO YOU WANT TO PLAY

685. AN ALPHABET GAME?

686. I STILL WANT IT

687. TO BE A MANATEE.

688. KEELA. HEY.

689. HAVE YOU EVER MET

690. A MANATEE?

691. NO.

692. THEY HAVE THE CRAZIEST

693. MATING BEHAVIOR

694. OF ANY SEA MAMMAL.

695. SHE LIKES YOU.

696. HAVE YOU EVER MET A MANATEE?

697. YEAH,

698. THERE WAS A SMALL HERD OF THEM

699. BEACHED OFF THE COAST

700. OF BOCA RATON

701. LAST MONTH,

702. AND I WAS ONE

703. OF THE BIOLOGISTS

704. CALLED IN

705. TO PROTECT THEM.

706. I'M GENE FEINBERG.

707. JENNY SCHECTER.

708. HEY.

709. WHAT HAPPENED

710. TO THEM?

711. WHY WERE THEY BEACHED?

712. WELL, THE ONE FEMALE WAS RUNNING

713. AWAY FROM THE FIVE MALES.

714. SHE STAYS IN HEAT

715. FOR... A MONTH,

716. AND THE BULLS

717. SPEND THE ENTIRE TIME

718. SMASHING

719. INTO EACH OTHER,

720. TRYING TO HAVE SEX

721. WITH HER.

722. THEN THEY JUST

723. KIND OF DITCH HER

724. ONCE SHE'S PREGNANT.

725. GOSH, THAT SOUNDS

726. LIKE A LOT OF HUMANS.

727. PLEASE TELL ME THAT'S NOT

728. YOUR EXPERIENCE WITH MEN.

729. NO,

730. NOT EXCLUSIVELY.

731. WELL, THAT'S GOOD.

732. DO YOU WORK HERE?

733. MM-HMM.

734. ASSISTANT CURATOR OF FISH

735. AND AQUARIUM

736. DIVE COORDINATOR,

737. AND...

738. YOU, IT APPEARS, WORK

739. AT A GROCERY STORE?

740. OH, GOD.

741. CAN YOU CAN TELL THAT

742. BY LOOKING AT ME?

743. OH, WELL,

744. I'M FAMILIAR

745. WITH THE RED-AND-WHITE

746. CHECKED...

747. OH, MY GOD.

748. BLOUSE THING.

749. LAURELWOOD FARMS,

750. RIGHT?

751. YES.

752. I DIDN'T KNOW

753. THAT FISH HAD CURATORS.

754. I DIDN'T KNOW

755. THAT NICE JEWISH GIRLS

756. WORKED IN GROCERY STORES.

757. IS THAT YOUR LIFE'S

758. CALLING, OR...

759. NO, IT'S NOT MY LIFE'S CALLING.

760. I'M... I'M A FICTION WRITER.

761. COOL.

762. HOW DO YOU KNOW

763. THAT I'M A NICE JEWISH GIRL?

764. ARE YOU IMPLYING

765. THAT YOU'RE NOT NICE?

766. TOO MANY GRAPES,

767. KEELA.

768. UM...

769. IF YOU WANTED

770. TO HAVE DINNER WITH ME,

771. I COULD TELL YOU

772. EVERYTHING I KNOW

773. ABOUT MANATEES.

774. THANKS.

775. OKAY.

776. UM... BYE.

777. BYE.

778. THANK YOU.

779. YOU'RE WELCOME.

780. EROS THE BITTERSWEET, HUH?

781. OKAY, I'LL READ IT.

782. WAIT, THERE IS

783. A PASSAGE

784. THAT IS

785. SO BEAUTIFUL.

786. I WOULD LOVE TO—

787. YOU KNOW WHAT, MARINA?

788. I REALLY... I GOT TO GO.

789. I'M SORRY.

790. OF COURSE.

791. THANKS.

792. HMM.

793. "THE GREEK WORD 'EROS'

794. DENOTES 'WANT,' 'LACK,'

795. "THE DESIRE

796. FOR THAT WHICH IS MISSING.

797. "THE LOVER WANTS

798. WHAT IT DOES NOT HAVE.

799. "IT IS BY DEFINITION

800. IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM

801. "TO HAVE

802. WHAT HE WANTS,

803. "IF...

804. "AS SOON

805. AS IT IS HAD,

806. IT IS NO LONGER

807. WANTING."

808. EXCUSE ME, HOW MUCH LONGER

809. IS THIS GOING TO BE?

810. YOU KNOW...

811. YOU KNOW,

812. THIS IS REALLY RIDICULOUS.

813. NOW, I HAVE BEEN HERE

814. I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG,

815. TRYING TO JUST—

816. HEY, HEY, HEY,

817. SIT TIGHT.

818. OKAY? OKAY?

819. I'M GOING TO

820. GO HUSTLE UP

821. A COUPLE OF BAIL BONDS

822. JUST IN CASE

823. NOBODY SHOWS UP WITH CASH...

824. OH.

825. AND I'LL BRING YOU

826. SOME REESE'S CUPS.

827. HOW DO YOU KNOW

828. THAT'S WHAT I WAS JONESING FOR?

829. OFFICER, I'M FRANKLIN PHILLIPS,

830. CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD

831. OF THE CALIFORNIA ART CENTER.

832. I'M HERE

833. TO POST BAIL

834. FOR BETTE PORTER.

835. THANK GOD.

836. WHERE YOU BEEN, MAN?

837. WELL,

838. I'VE BEEN AT A COCKTAIL PARTY

839. FOR THE GOVERNOR.

840. WHO ARE YOU?

841. KIT PORTER, BETTE'S SISTER.

842. OH. WELL, NICE TO MEET YOU.

843. CAN WE HURRY THIS UP, PLEASE?

844. WE'VE GOT A LOT

845. OF PAPERWORK

846. TO PROCESS.

847. YOU MIGHT WANT

848. TO HAVE A SEAT.

849. MS. PORTER.

850. GO AHEAD, DO THE "W's.

851. WEST VIRGINIA,

852. WASHINGTON,

853. WISCONSIN...

854. WYOMING.

855. I THINK THAT'S IT.

856. THERE ARE NO "X,"Y's, OR "Z's.

857. LET'S DO MATH.

858. WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

859. TWO PLUS TWO

860. EQUALS FOUR.

861. THE SQUARE

862. OF THE HYPOTENUSE SIDE

863. OF A RIGHT TRIANGLE

864. IS EQUAL

865. TO THE SUM OF THE SQUARES

866. ON THE OTHER

867. TWO SIDES.

868. HEY.

869. HEY.

870. I'M TALKING TO YOU.

871. UM, DO YOU REMEMBER

872. THE FIRST TIME

873. THAT YOU WERE EVER REALLY,

874. REALLY EMBARRASSED

875. BY ONE OF YOUR PARENTS?

876. ABSOLUTELY.

877. IT WAS BEFORE MY DAD

878. GOT TRANSFERRED

879. TO TEXAS.

880. WE WERE LIVING

881. IN FORT LAUDERDALE.

882. 13 YEARS OLD.

883. OH, MY GOD.

884. JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL.

885. WHAT?

886. I—

887. WHEN I WAS 13, I...

888. WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

889. I JUST HAD A TOTAL FLASHBACK.

890. I HAVE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THAT,

891. PLEASE.

892. NO, NO, NO.

893. I WANT TO HEAR

894. ABOUT YOUR STORY.

895. OKAY, FINE.

896. OKAY, GOOD.

897. SO MY MOM'S DROPPING ME OFF

898. AT THIS PARTY.

899. RIGHT.

900. FIRST TIME I GET INVITED

901. TO A COOL KIDS' PARTY,

902. AND SHE INSISTS

903. ON WALKING ME IN,

904. WHICH IS ALREADY

905. TOTALLY HUMILIATING.

906. THEN SHE'S KISSING ME GOODBYE,

907. ON THE LIPS,

908. AND AS SHE'S

909. WALKING AWAY,

910. SHE TURNS BACK

911. AND SHE CALLS OUT,

912. SHE SAYS, "HONEY, REMEMBER,

913. THE MORE YOU HANG ONTO IT,

914. "THE MORE THEY WANT IT,

915. "SO DON'T LET ANY OF THE BOYS

916. GET FUNNY WITH YOU."

917. THAT WAS HORRIBLE.

918. THAT'S AWFUL.

919. AS IT TURNS OUT,

920. I WASN'T EVEN INTERESTED

921. IN BOYS.

922. DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU WERE GAY?

923. NO, I JUST KNEW

924. I WASN'T INTO BOYS.

925. I DIDN'T REALIZE

926. I WAS ATTRACTED TO GIRLS

927. UNTIL THE FIRST

928. CIRCUS TOUR I DID.

929. I FELL MADLY IN LOVE THAT YEAR.

930. OH, GOD.

931. WITH THE BEARDED LADY?

932. NO.

933. YES.

934. NO, IT WASN'T.

935. I CAN'T STAND IT.

936. I'M SORRY

937. IT'S SO PAINFUL.

938. IT'S SO PAINFUL.

939. WHAT ARE YOU DOING RIGHT NOW?

940. I JUST LAID DOWN.

941. I'M LYING

942. ON TOP OF YOU.

943. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M DOING

944. RIGHT NOW?

945. I THINK SO.

946. GOD, THIS IS

947. FUCKING INSANE.

948. WHAT ARE YOU DOING

949. TO ME?

950. FUCKING YOU.

951. COME OVER HERE.

952. I AM THERE.

953. YOU KNOW I AM.

954. SO... I REMEMBER

955. THAT WE WERE

956. ALL SQUISHED

957. INTO THE BACKSEAT

958. OF THE CAR.

959. YEAH.

960. IT WAS—IT WAS ME,

961. TODD, AMY,

962. AND OF COURSE

963. ANDREW,

964. AND WE WERE ALL

965. MAKING OUT,

966. WHICH WAS GOOD,

967. AND THEN I FELT

968. THAT ANDREW

969. HAD AN ERECTION,

970. AND IT WAS JUST...

971. AND I REACHED OVER.

972. AND I UNDID HIS FLY.

973. AND I REMEMBER

974. IT WAS

975. REALLY SMALL...

976. AND I REMEMBER

977. IT WAS JUST LIKE...

978. HE WAS REALLY

979. TERRIFIED.

980. SO YOU DID IT?

981. I DID,

982. WITH MY PANTIES ON.

983. I JUST SLIPPED THEM TO THE SIDE,

984. AND I DID IT.

985. I DON'T KNOW WHY.

986. I JUST FELT, LIKE...

987. "I HAVE TO DO THIS."

988. HMM.

989. YOU WERE 13.

990. YEAH.

991. HEY, JENNY,

992. YOU IN THERE?

993. YOU SAID

994. YOU'D BE HOME.

995. UM...

996. WHAT'S GOING ON?

997. SHIT. TIM...

998. JEN? JENNY,

999. COME ON OUT.

1000. YEAH, JENNY.

1001. COME ON OUT AND PLAY.

1002. WHO THE HELL

1003. IS THAT?

1004. I, UH...

1005. SHUT UP AND EAT.

1006. CHEERS.

1007. WHO IS THAT?

1008. UM... HMM.

1009. THAT—THAT'S TIM.

1010. THAT—THAT'S MY EX.

1011. AH.

1012. HE'S RENTING ME

1013. THE PLACE,

1014. AND HE SAID THAT

1015. HE WOULD BE OUT

1016. REALLY LATE

1017. TONIGHT.

1018. OH.

1019. WELL...

1020. MAYBE

1021. WE SHOULD TRY THIS

1022. ANOTHER TIME, HUH?

1023. HOW ABOUT FRIDAY?

1024. I CAN'T.

1025. OH.

1026. I... I'M WORKING

1027. AT LAURELWOOD FARMS,

1028. THE LATE SHIFT

1029. BECAUSE I NEED THE MONEY.

1030. I'VE BEEN THERE.

1031. UM, ARE YOU FREE

1032. ON SATURDAY NIGHT?

1033. I HAVE A DATE.

1034. OH.

1035. I'M DATING.

1036. OF COURSE YOU ARE.

1037. THIS WAS A DATE, RIGHT?

1038. TOTALLY.

1039. WELL, UM, WHY DON'T I JUST...

1040. I'LL...

1041. UM, I'LL CALL YOU,

1042. AND WE'LL WORK IT OUT.

1043. YES.

1044. BYE. LATER.

1045. OKAY, I'LL CALL YOU TOMORROW.

1046. OKAY.

1047. YEAH!

1048. LOOK AT THAT, TIM.

1049. YES!

1050. WHOO!

1051. YES!

1052. YES.

1053. WHOO!

1054. I GUESS

1055. YOU WEREN'T MAN ENOUGH FOR HER.

1056. WOULD YOU GROW UP?

1057. OH, COME ON NOW. YES!

1058. HELLO?

1059. OH.

1060. HELLO, GENE.

1061. HOW ARE YOU?

1062. YES.

1063. WELL...

1064. I WOULD LOVE

1065. TO SPEND AN EVENING WITH YOU

1066. AND SEVERAL

1067. OF YOUR MANATEE FRIENDS.

1068. WELL, I WILL SEE YOU

1069. ON SATURDAY NIGHT.

1070. OKAY.

1071. BYE.

1072. UH, THANKS, JUDGE.

1073. I OWE YOU.

1074. IT WON'T BE LONG NOW.

1075. I PUT IN SOME CALLS DOWNTOWN.

1076. YOU KNOW, THIS SUCKS.

1077. YOU NEED TO TAKE BETTER CARE

1078. OF YOUR PEOPLE.

1079. OH, MY GOD,

1080. I GOT THE MESSAGE

1081. A HALF HOUR AGO.

1082. OSCAR AND I

1083. WERE DOING THE SOUP KITCHEN.

1084. I'M SO SORRY.

1085. HAVE A SEAT.

1086. THE PETTY BUREAUCRATS

1087. ARE PULLING A POWER TRIP ON US

1088. HERE.

1089. HAVE THEY

1090. SET BAIL?

1091. YES, IT'S $2,000.

1092. WE'VE GOT IT

1093. COVERED,

1094. AND FOR THE ARTIST... PERNAO,

1095. WHATEVER HER NAME IS.

1096. WHAT ABOUT THE OTHERS?

1097. WHAT OTHERS?

1098. I'M NOT RESPONSIBLE

1099. FOR ANY OTHERS.

1100. I'LL SEE

1101. WHAT I CAN DO

1102. TO GET THEM THROUGH

1103. QUICKER,

1104. AND THEN WE'LL GET

1105. SOME BAIL BONDS.

1106. FUCK.

1107. FUCK.

1108. I NEED A CIGARETTE.

1109. YOU SMOKE?

1110. NOT SINCE I WAS 12.

1111. PORTER, JEWELL, YOU MADE BAIL.

1112. YOU GUYS...

1113. DID THEY DO

1114. ANYTHING STUPID

1115. TO YOU IN THERE, HUH?

1116. OH, MAN.

1117. JAIL IS WHACK.

1118. OH, I'M SO GLAD

1119. YOU GUYS ARE HERE.

1120. WHERE'S BETTE?

1121. I DON'T KNOW.

1122. SHE GOT THROWN IN A CELL WITH—

1123. HEY.

1124. HEY.

1125. OH, THIS IS

1126. CANDACE JEWELL,

1127. MY CELL MATE.

1128. BETTE HAS BEEN TELLING ME

1129. WHAT AN INCREDIBLE JOB

1130. YOU'VE BEEN DOING AT THE CAC.

1131. IT'S NICE TO FINALLY MEET YOU.

1132. THANKS.

1133. YEAH, YOU, TOO.

1134. UNDER SOME CRAZY

1135. CIRCUMSTANCES.

1136. YEAH.

1137. HOW DID YOU GET TANGLED UP

1138. IN THIS MESS?

1139. OH, WELL,

1140. MY CREW AND I

1141. WERE DOING SOME WORK

1142. DOWN AT THE GALLERY,

1143. AND THE BIBLE THUMPERS

1144. STARTED DOING

1145. THEIR THING OUTSIDE.

1146. THANK YOU SO MUCH.

1147. ONE THING LED TO ANOTHER...

1148. IT WAS REALLY SWEET.

1149. THEY TREAT YOU OKAY?

1150. YEAH.

1151. HEY.

1152. HEY, BABY SIS.

1153. OH, I WANT YOU

1154. TO MEET IVAN.

1155. HE GAVE ME

1156. A RIDE OVER HERE.

1157. HI.

1158. UH, "HE"?

1159. HI. NICE

1160. TO MEET YOU.

1161. OH, GEE, IVAN, I'M SO SORRY.

1162. I'M SO—

1163. HEY, NO WORRIES.

1164. I'M HAPPY EITHER WAY.

1165. CAN WE GIVE ANYONE

1166. A LIFT?

1167. YEAH,

1168. WEST HOLLYWOOD.

1169. SAME HERE.

1170. I'M STAYING

1171. IN A HOTEL.

1172. I DON'T KNOW

1173. WHERE IT IS, THOUGH. IT'S...

1174. IT'S THE SUNSET MARQUIS.

1175. IT'S RIGHT AROUND

1176. WHERE THEY LIVE.

1177. YOU KNOW,

1178. I'M GOING TO STAY.

1179. I THINK CHERIE'S

1180. GOING TO GET ME, SO...

1181. WHAT ABOUT YOU,

1182. CANDACE?

1183. DO YOU NEED A RIDE?

1184. UH, I LIVE

1185. ALL THE WAY

1186. IN SILVER LAKE,

1187. SO I'LL JUST GET

1188. A CAB.

1189. DON'T BE SILLY.

1190. WE'LL GIVE YOU RIDE HOME.

1191. I LIVE

1192. IN LOS FELIZ.

1193. I'LL GIVE YOU A RIDE

1194. IF YOU'D LIKE.

1195. OH, THANK YOU,

1196. THAT WOULD—THAT WOULD BE GREAT.

1197. THANKS FOR GIVING HER A RIDE.

1198. LET'S GO.

1199. HEY, BE GOOD.

1200. HEY, CHERIE, IT'S ME.

1201. WHERE ARE YOU?

1202. UM... I'M FREE FINALLY,

1203. SO IF YOU STILL WANT

1204. TO GET TOGETHER,

1205. WILL YOU CALL ME BACK?

1206. I...

1207. I THINK I'M JUST GOING TO WAIT

1208. HERE UNTIL I HEAR FROM YOU,

1209. SO...

1210. SO PLEASE CALL BACK.

1211. BYE.

1212. UH... SORRY

1213. ABOUT THAT.

1214. YEAH, THAT WAS

1215. TOO SOON.

1216. CAN I ASK YOU

1217. A QUESTION?

1218. YEAH.

1219. WAS IT MY FAULT?

1220. WAS WHAT YOUR FAULT?

1221. YOU LIKING WOMEN.

1222. WAS IT BECAUSE

1223. I WAS...

1224. INADEQUATE IN SOME WAY?

1225. NO.

1226. UM, BECAUSE...

1227. IT'S BEEN ON MY MIND...

1228. AND I REALLY NEED YOU

1229. TO BE...

1230. HONEST WITH ME.

1231. YOU'RE SUCH A GOOD MAN.