The Jamie Foxx Show 1x10

1. Thank you so much. Enjoy your stay.

2. Now, that was a good movie.

3. - Yeah. - Hmm.

4. I know one thing

5. they can put some more butter on this popcorn.

6. Did you have to bring that back with you?

7. I mean, really.

8. Hey, man, this thing cost me

9. seventeen bones, brother.

10. And I'm eatin' every kernel.

11. Well, listen, babies, now did you kids enjoy the movie?

12. Oh, yeah.

13. That dark chocolate Wesley Snipes

14. with all that body.

15. - Ooh. - Oh, he's alright.

16. Please, Wesley looked good. You're just player hatin'.

17. Why you think I'm player hatin'?

18. I'm just sayin', you're just after his fame

19. and after his money and everything like that

20. and now what if he was just a regular guy with a regular job

21. doin' just regular old thing.

22. Then he would be you.

23. But a little better-lookin'.

24. A-a-ah.

25. Good one, Francesca.

26. - Thank you. - 'That is funny.'

27. Well, anyway, Mr. Beijing, look, I..

28. I didn't just come to this hotel

29. just to work here, my brother.

30. I came here to get my 15 minutes of fame

31. and if I'm a little lucky, I can stretch it on out to 30.

32. "America's Most Wanted" is a one-hour show.

33. Thank you.

34. Hey-hey, that's 75 cents, brah.

35. Stevie, honey, you know you're gonna

36. have to get out there and make your dreams happen.

37. Opportunity is not gonna just walk through that door.

38. Excuse me, who do I see about making a movie at this hotel?

39. My brother, I'm Jamie King, nice to meet you.

40. You look like opportunity.

41. You know we were just talking about you.

42. You wanna shoot a movie in our hotel?

43. Uh, oh, uh, Aunt Helen, don't play yourself.

44. Don't you know who this is?

45. This is Ike Yee.

46. Ike Yee, baby, famous writer, famous producer

47. famous director, come on.

48. Hey man, I loved all your films.

49. "Do the rice thing."

50. Oh, man, I was hungry, I was hungry, brother. Yeah.

51. That was nice, man.

52. - Excuse me. - Yeah, alright.

53. Well, this is so exciting.

54. You actually wanna shoot a movie right here?

55. That's right, we love your hotel.

56. It's the perfect location for a Ike Yee movie.

57. Well, I'm sorry, sir, but, uh..

58. this is not the good place to do this, 'cause—

59. Aunt Helen, you got to run Mr. Opportunity away?

60. - Hey, ya'll, what's happenin'? - Hey, Uncle Junior.

61. You know they wanna shoot a movie here.

62. Is that a fact?

63. But they're not comin' in here and smashing up

64. our hotel right, Junior?

65. I'll pay you 10 Gs plus any damages.

66. Hey, well, smash this sucker, baby.

67. - That's what I'm talkin' about. - Alright, hold on, everybody.

68. Now, I don't think this is a good idea, now, you—

69. Uh, Aunt Helen, look, I came out here to be in show business.

70. - This is a perfect time. - Sweetheart, I know that.

71. And I'm sorry but I run a business here.

72. Okay, I guess I'll just be a failure then.

73. Join a gang or somethin'.

74. Westside!

75. Dawn of the Ws.

76. Wassup, dawg, I've been shot.

77. Check the wound, baby. Check the wound.

78. It'll give the boy an opportunity to act.

79. Yeah, but you don't know that, Junior.

80. And besides the man didn't say

81. he was gonna give Jamie a part in the movie, now did he?

82. Hey, well, let me handle it. Don't even sweat it.

83. Mr. Yee..

84. I was just thinkin', if we give you, you know

85. the hotel and everything then

86. why don't you let me be down with the movie?

87. - Oh, what do you do? - I act.

88. You-you ever seen "The Silence of the Lambs?"

89. "So when you left that little farm, Clarice

90. "where did you go?

91. "Poor little Clarice.

92. "A census taker once tried to interview me.

93. "I ate his liver with some fava beans

94. And a nice Chianti."

95. - So what do you think? - No doubt about it.

96. You stink.

97. But since I need the hotel, I'll give you a part.

98. Cool. Come on, aunt, it's right there for the takin'.

99. - Oh, alright. - Alright, as I was sayin'.

100. Oh-oh, man, I'm just six months in LA

101. I'm already doin' my first movie, baby.

102. Action!

103. Carry on.

104. 'Oh.'

105. You one of the actors, huh?

106. Hey, man, how you doin'?

107. Uh, so you gonna be in my movie too, huh?

108. That's cool, that's cool.

109. So, uh, what part you playin'?

110. I play the accountant who runs off with all the money.

111. Right, right, right. I feel it. I feel it.

112. I also get to have sex with all the women.

113. Ha! That's what I'm talkin' about, that's what I'm..

114. Hey, do ya'll really be doin' it?

115. It's just.. I mean, how they do that? 'Cause..

116. This must be your first movie, huh?

117. Well, my first California movie, yeah.

118. I mean, I did a lot of movies in Texas and everythin'.

119. You know, but me and my co-star, we'd erase them right after

120. you know, we get through this, I'm just sayin'..

121. Okay, excuse me.

122. - Security! - Is that a S-curl when you..

123. 'Security.'

124. Jackie, baby. Hey, hey, hey.

125. - Hey, is that Jackie Chin? - Of course.

126. Oh, man, he done bloat up.

127. More like Jackie Double Chin up there.

128. - Hyah! - Oh!

129. Oh, man, you know I'm a big of yours, man.

130. Brah. You..

131. You tight, man. I never get that movie you was doin'.

132. It was at nursin' home and you got mad.

133. 'Cause they had towed your car you was parkin'

134. in the handicap parkin'.

135. And then you turn all the IV bottles into nunchakus.

136. You was, wah-wah-wah.

137. All women, and.. Boy, you was tight.

138. Yo, Ike.

139. Who's Charlie Brown nose over here ridin' my jock?

140. Oh, oh, Jack, Jack, you got a little brother in you too.

141. Wassup, big boy?

142. Don't worry about him, Jackie, he's just background.

143. So is my star ready?

144. I've been ready, baby, the question is

145. is the world ready?

146. Just tell me what I'm playing.

147. Okay, you have a very important part.

148. - Right, right. - You atmosphere.

149. Atmosphere.

150. That sounds large.

151. Yeah, you stand in the background..

152. and act like you're not even here.

153. Silent... but effective.

154. Right.

155. So how's my movie star?

156. Well, I don't wanna go as far as

157. and say movie star or anything like that.

158. I'm.. You know, I'm tryin' to stay grounded.

159. Tryin' to stay focused and give back to the community.

160. Okay, places, everybody.

161. Okay, Jackie, this is the scene.

162. You have arrived on the secret island

163. to take part in the martial arts tournament.

164. And you're checking into this hotel.

165. Gotcha.

166. Hey, so, Ike, what's my motivation?

167. Am-am I little bit country, lil' bit rock 'n' roll?

168. - Your part here is very subtle. - Subtle. Subtle.

169. Right. When Jackie comes in you hand him the key.

170. But you just do it and say nothing.

171. Say nothin'? But what about all of my talent?

172. Oh, don't worry, don't worry, your part is very important.

173. Right.

174. I see what you doin', man.

175. You a genius.

176. Yo savin' me for all the other scenes.

177. Yes.

178. Save it. Okay.

179. Camera ready?

180. And... action.

181. I need the key to my room.

182. Okay, he-here's the key and everythin'.

183. And I got some butt naked women upstairs.

184. Cold chillin' and waiting on you, baby.

185. We going to get down!

186. Cut! Cut, cut.

187. Cut, cut, cut.

188. What the hell are you doing? That's not in my script.

189. Oh, my bad. I-I-I'm outta bounds, huh? I'm outta bounds.

190. Bu-bu-but what I wanted to tell you is about your script.

191. There's a couple of things that aren't working for me.

192. Like, uh, when brother came from a long trip, you know

193. from the far east, he needs to get upstairs

194. get him a full body massage, you know

195. get some of those honeys around him, you know what I'm sayin'.

196. I'm just tryin' to keep it real.

197. Okay, well, uh, just keep it real quiet.

198. This not your movie.

199. Right.

200. My bad.

201. Okay, in this scene you are frantically searching

202. for your keys to the speedboat.

203. Your only way off the island.

204. Okay, let's hurry up and shoot this

205. before that atmosphere guy comes back.

206. And... action.

207. Boo-yah!

208. Wassup, dawg? You lookin' for these?

209. Hey, what you think you was just gonna do?

210. Leave a brother on this island all by myself

211. after I done hooked you up with all them honeys and stuff?

212. I don't think so.

213. What the hell are you talkin' about?

214. I'm talking no justice, no keys.

215. No justice, no keys.

216. - No— - Cut! Cut! cut!

217. Am I out of bounds?

218. - Excuse me. - Yes, can I help you?

219. - Fancy, right? - You must be psychic.

220. You know, Fancy, I do all my own stunts.

221. Oh, that's nice.

222. That's why they call me..

223. Superman Steve.

224. You know, once I jumped form a ten-story building

225. and I missed the airbag.

226. And was still able to go out dancin'.

227. All night long.

228. Wow, you must really be tough.

229. I am.

230. Okay, Steve, let's walk through this scene.

231. Ciao, baby.

232. Superman Steve gotta go make that money.

233. So the ladies will still love him.

234. I need you to stand right behind the counter, right there.

235. 'Ow!'

236. Hey, ya'll slam dancin' in here? This ain't no club.

237. What happened to him?

238. You happened to him, atmosphere!

239. You knocked down Steve.

240. Oops, my bad.

241. What are we gonna do now, Ike?

242. I don't know. Whose legs are you gonna break?

243. Whose neck will you snap? Whose skull are you gonna crush?

244. Atmosphere.

245. Hey, you. Where's that nephew of yours?

246. The name is Mrs. King.

247. And he's probably just studying his lines.

248. I tell you, you've never met anyone

249. as down to earth and responsible as my Nephew Jamie.

250. Yeah, and that's what I told Scorsese.

251. Hey, have no fear, atmosphere is here.

252. Along with my entourage.

253. Oh, brother.

254. Jamie, what in the world are you doing?

255. Boy, have you lost your mind?

256. Oh, not hardly, Aunt Helen, chickie, baby, chill.

257. Is it the white girls that throwin' ya?

258. Come on now, we in Hollywood.

259. Some of my best friends are white people.

260. You're 45 minutes late.

261. Where's your wardrobe?

262. Oh, he asked me to get it, Mr. Yee.

263. Ladies, shall we step to the couch?

264. I had to run all around but I got what you asked for.

265. - Well, let's see it. - Now which one do you want?

266. Uh, not that one.

267. Especially not that one.

268. I especially hate that one too. Uh, take 'em all back.

269. I guess I'll just wear what I have on.

270. - Ain't that right, ladies? - Mm-hmm.

271. Jamie, I spent all afternoon getting these.

272. Well, you can take all afternoon and just take 'em back.

273. I'm lettin' you go, anyway.

274. Jamie, you must be trippin'. I did this for free.

275. Oh, well, you're let go. Security!

276. Small and chocolate, combative.

277. Ladies. Uh, excuse me, Jamie

278. uh, I was just curious, have you read the script yet?

279. Script, script, script. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

280. The ladies read it. They loved it.

281. Well, you might wanna re-consider. I—

282. Well, you know what, Braxton?

283. Maybe you wanna re-consider just comin' up

284. botherin' the hell out of me.

285. Look... this is my time to shine

286. and, my brother, you are standing in my light.

287. Now, I suggest you find you some business. Security!

288. Taller, combative.

289. Thank you.

290. Places, everybody.

291. Okay, atmosphere, you ready?

292. It's Mr. Atmosphere, but I'll let you

293. get away with that one this time.

294. I was born ready. What are you havin' me do?

295. Now, all you have to do is..

296. pull your gun say your line and start shootin'.

297. Jackie knows the rest.

298. Well, I tell you what, Ike, baby

299. just keep the camera on me.

300. and by the way..

301. And action.

302. Jackie man, I have a special delivery for you... man.

303. Yeah? What's that?

304. It's bullets. With your name on it, man.

305. So sorry.

306. Your gun is empty.

307. - Just like your threats. - What?

308. Ugh! What you doin'?

309. Hey, what you gonna do?

310. Jamie? Are you alright?

311. - Jamie.. - Uh, hey, alright, man.

312. What, uh, what happened?

313. You were perfect.

314. - I was? - Yes.

315. Excellent rehearsal.

316. Okay, everybody, get ready to shoot this one.

317. Jamie, are you alright, man? You alright?

318. Hey, hey, man, I'm a-alright, man.

319. I was born for this.

320. That's why they pay me the big bucks.

321. Hey, I didn't know you had a twin.

322. Hey, wassup, dawg? You brought all your homies with you.

323. That's cool.

324. Hey, what ya'll doin' in my room?

325. Man, ya'll everywhere.

326. Okay, atmosphere, I know it's been a little rough

327. but in this scene you get the best of Jackie Chin.

328. Yeah, 'cause I was gonna tell you man, I'm Jamie King.

329. Not Rodney King.

330. Don't worry, this is a film, not video tape.

331. Okay, places, everybody.

332. And action.

333. Hey, Jackie, man

334. I suggest you put that chicken down, man.

335. Or I might have to cluck you up, man.

336. Man!

337. Nobody messes with Atmosphere Jones, ma-a-a-n.

338. I am so happy Jamie didn't get knocked around again.

339. Really? I'm kinda disappointed.

340. Well, don't be. The best is yet to come.

341. Ooh, Lord, my poor nephew!

342. Hey, hey, my man. Hey, man..

343. Cut.

344. That was perfect.

345. - Jamie, are you okay? - Look at him.

346. - Does he look okay? - Whoa, who ya'll? Who ya'll?

347. Jamie, baby, you better tell that Ike man

348. you quittin' this movie before you get killed.

349. - Yeah. - Right, right, right.

350. 'Cause when they say it was my big break

351. I didn't know they meant me..

352. Why are you people cluttering up my set?

353. Your set? This is our hotel.

354. I paid for the whole day.

355. In two hours you can have this dump back.

356. Yeah, scram.

357. - Oh, no, they didn't. - You just..

358. I will break you off something pugilistic.

359. If I must.

360. Oh, hey, hey, B, that's alright, baby, you ain't gotta get down.

361. Let me take care of this.

362. You ain't gotta get down.

363. We got one more scene left.

364. And I'mma blow it up. Trust me.

365. Yo, Ike, let's do this, baby.

366. Okay, perfect, let's shoot this.

367. Okay, this is the climax of the whole film.

368. Atmosphere, this is where you really get your ass kicked.

369. That's cool, I'm cool with that.

370. Uh, I just wanna ask you one question.

371. Can I change up the lines a little bit?

372. Do whatever you want, Jackie's gonna kill you anyway.

373. Okay, places, everybody!

374. And action.

375. Now I got you.

376. You stole my wife, and my money.

377. And I want my money back.

378. Come take it, fat boy.

379. What? It wasn't in the script.

380. Nobody talks to me that way.

381. Ugh! Oh, come on, Shamu, you can do better than that, baby.

382. Let's rumble, baby, what you wanna do?

383. Shey. Hyah, hyah, hyah, hyah!

384. You might have got me if you didn't have

385. that sand bag underneath your arm.

386. Is that a doughnut over there?

387. - Doughnuts? - No, dough-nut!

388. You don't know who you're fooling with, do you?

389. Cut. What are you doing?

390. That's not my ending.

391. That's my endin'. For disrespectin' me.

392. And disrespectin' my people.

393. And disrespectin' the Shaolin Temple.

394. That's it, that's it. I'm going home.

395. Where you going? Back to Hong Kong?

396. Hong Kong? No, I live in Rancho Cucamonga.

397. Peace.

398. Hey, you..

399. - Ah, hey, good mornin'. - 'Good mornin'.'

400. Hey, Hollywood.

401. Oh, look, hey, about the Hollywood stuff..

402. I think I'm gonna let that rest for a little while.

403. I was stupid. I guess I let all that stuff go to my head.

404. I-I know one thing though.

405. I know how not to treat my peeps when I make it big.

406. Well, that's okay, baby.

407. You're not the only person

408. to get carried away by Hollywood.

409. Yeah, and you won't be the last.

410. - Right, right, right. - Junior, where you goin'?

411. Oh, I was just on my way to the bank.

412. I mean, the track.

413. Shucks, I said right the first time.

414. Hold on, Junior.

415. I'm goin' with you to make sure that money makes it to the bank.

416. Helen, where is the trust?

417. Guaranty Trust right around the corner, come on.

418. So, uh, Jamie, is your movie career over?

419. Oh, no, it ain't over, you know, I'm just..

420. takin' my time, you know, ain't no rush.

421. Sorry I'm late, everybody.

422. Traffic is all backed up.

423. Thanks to that Gary Gray picture that's shooting down the street.

424. It's called, uh, "Blow It Off", uh, "Flick It Off"

425. or "Set It Off", I don't know.

426. "Set It Off", "Set It Off", "Set It Off."

427. - "Set It Off". Gary Gray. - Right.

428. Well, look, I gotta go by that way to pick up stuff.

429. But, Jamie, I thought you said—

430. Well, don't worry about that.

431. Hey, look, hey..

432. Hey, Gary!

433. There's no movie down the street, is there?

434. Nope.

435. Got him.

436. - Boo-yah! - Ah!

437. Hey, wassup, dawg? You lookin' for these?

438. What you think you was just gonna do?

439. You just gonna leave a brother on an island

440. after I done hooked you up with butt naked

441. and everything, like that.

442. You gonna leave me like this?

443. Cut! Cut, cut, cut!

444. Let me ask you somethin'.

445. Does this smell like in here?