1. Someone had
a good night.Copy !req
2. Do you think
all of these people
have had sex?Copy !req
3. And if so,
shouldn't they
be more happy?Copy !req
4. Maybe their experiencesCopy !req
5. weren't as recent
as yours.Copy !req
6. I think about sex
with everyone.Copy !req
7. But mostly with Carly.Copy !req
8. She and I
are very compatible.Copy !req
9. That's great, Shaun,
but H.R. might not approve.Copy !req
10. About me
thinking of sex?Copy !req
11. No, about saying you're
thinking about sex.Copy !req
12. And stop it.Copy !req
13. Smiling while talking
to a dying man is not cool.Copy !req
14. Dr. Blaize recommended
we speak to youCopy !req
15. about a permanent port.Copy !req
16. It would simplify
your chemo sessions.Copy !req
17. No more hunting
for a vein every time.Copy !req
18. Anything to help
with the nausea?Copy !req
19. It's a normal
side effect.Copy !req
20. Anything you can do
for the exhaustion?Copy !req
21. Anything...Copy !req
22. So that my muscles
don't ache?Copy !req
23. But you can keep me
from being stuck
by a needle.Copy !req
24. They're just trying
to help.Copy !req
25. I know.Copy !req
26. All the doctors
are trying to help.Copy !req
27. I'm sorry.Copy !req
28. Thank you.Copy !req
29. But I-I don't need the port.Copy !req
30. And I don't need
any more chemo.Copy !req
31. Of course you do.Copy !req
32. It's going to give you
more time.Copy !req
33. Honey, I'm miserable.Copy !req
34. Cerebral cavernous
malformations.Copy !req
35. Leads to bleeding, clots,
seizures, muscle weakness,Copy !req
36. even paralysis.Copy !req
37. You have clusters of them.Copy !req
38. And they're getting worse.Copy !req
39. The woman at Hopkins
gave me a year.Copy !req
40. Mass General, two years.Copy !req
41. So, what, you figured
I'd give you three?Copy !req
42. Some new treatment?Copy !req
43. You know the treatment,
Caroline... A lobectomy.Copy !req
44. I love the way surgeons
blithely suggestCopy !req
45. cutting through
my cerebral cortexCopy !req
46. to remove part of my brain.
Hmm.Copy !req
47. Why not just
take an egg slicer
to my ability to paint?Copy !req
48. Yes, it will likely lead
to a curtailmentCopy !req
49. of your ability
to be creative,Copy !req
50. but all of
your other faculties
will remain intact.Copy !req
51. I had a severe prognosis
of my own recently.Copy !req
52. Surgery, chemo,
radiation, the works.Copy !req
53. My greatest fear
wasn't at the edges
of the spectrum.Copy !req
54. It wasn't life or death.Copy !req
55. My greatest fearCopy !req
56. was survival
as something lesser.Copy !req
57. Then you know.Copy !req
58. And then I had
a revelation of sorts.Copy !req
59. Who I am,
how I think of myselfCopy !req
60. isn't defined by
my skill as a surgeon.Copy !req
61. Uh, I'm seeing
you as a courtesy.Copy !req
62. I don't do this anymore.Copy !req
63. And guess what?
I'm fine.Copy !req
64. I'm happier.Copy !req
65. You could have 20,
30 more years
with your family.Copy !req
66. A balanced life isn't
necessarily a lesser life.Copy !req
67. I disagree.Copy !req
68. Twenty bucks says
Shaun mentions sexCopy !req
69. in front of a patient
in the next 24 hours.Copy !req
70. He's excited.Copy !req
71. I'm sure you were when
a new world opened up.Copy !req
72. But he knows better.Copy !req
73. Twenty bucks.
No.Copy !req
74. Morgan.Copy !req
75. Oh, I was hoping
I'd see you.Copy !req
76. Hello.Copy !req
77. Perfect.Copy !req
78. I was just wondering where
to get lunch around here.Copy !req
79. Any genre,
as long as it's
locally sourced.Copy !req
80. Is this a friend?Copy !req
81. I'm Caroline Reznick.Copy !req
82. Oh, hi.Copy !req
83. My mother.Copy !req
84. What are you doing here?Copy !req
85. What beautiful eyes.Copy !req
86. I hope...Copy !req
87. S-someone...Copy !req
88. P-paint...Copy !req
89. Mom!Copy !req
90. Mom? Mom.Copy !req
91. Mom, can you hear me?Copy !req
92. Code blue.
We need a crash cart.Copy !req
93. I've come to take you
to lunch.Copy !req
94. It's only 11:15.Copy !req
95. M-Morgan told meCopy !req
96. that it might
be considered
unprofessionalCopy !req
97. to discuss sex on the job.Copy !req
98. So, when you say "lunch"...Copy !req
99. It's sex.Copy !req
100. I am expected
to be here working.Copy !req
101. People in the Pathology LabCopy !req
102. take two 15-minute breaks
on their shift.Copy !req
103. If they were combined
into oneCopy !req
104. and we used the
bus that stops
out front at 11:25,Copy !req
105. with one returning
at 12:15,Copy !req
106. and we borrowed some
of your lunch hour...Copy !req
107. You only require 22 minutes
to eat a sandwich...Copy !req
108. There would be
just enough timeCopy !req
109. to get to your apartment
and back.Copy !req
110. Have you noticed the time
you've allotted for "lunch"Copy !req
111. is fairly short?Copy !req
112. Long enough.Copy !req
113. Long enough for you,
not for me.Copy !req
114. You've only had sex
once in your life.Copy !req
115. No one expects you
to win awards,Copy !req
116. and it was lovely
sharing the moment.Copy !req
117. Are you implying the sex
could be improved on?Copy !req
118. Yes.Copy !req
119. Does that bother you?Copy !req
120. No.Copy !req
121. I have no objection
to improving sex.Copy !req
122. Although, I thought it was
already excellent.Copy !req
123. I'll work on it.Copy !req
124. DR. Found the source
of the bleed.Copy !req
125. Suctioning
and evacuating
the clot cavity.Copy !req
126. The Cav Mals
are everywhere.Copy !req
127. She could have
a massive bleed
at any time.Copy !req
128. I thought
Morgan's parents
were doctors.Copy !req
129. I heard that, too.
Why would Morgan
let us think...Copy !req
130. DR.
Maybe you should
save the speculationCopy !req
131. until your hands aren't
in my mother's skull.Copy !req
132. Use your inside voice,
Morgan.Copy !req
133. Turn down the volume.Copy !req
134. Irrigate and remove
the cottonoid.Copy !req
135. DR. Why didn't
she tell us she was
one of those Reznicks?Copy !req
136. Caroline Reznick,
painter.Copy !req
137. Her son's a sculptor.
Daughter's a composer.Copy !req
138. Didn't know she had
another kid.Copy !req
139. They're famous, if you're
into the arts at all.Copy !req
140. Mia got you going
to galleries?Copy !req
141. Yeah,
I'm kind of loving it.Copy !req
142. I've failed Carly twice.Copy !req
143. Did you forget her birthday
or stand her up?Copy !req
144. Are you talking
about sex?Copy !req
145. Uh, Morgan says H.R. would
prefer I avoid that word.Copy !req
146. Just to be clear,
are you saying she...Copy !req
147. Are you saying
she didn't...Copy !req
148. There was no parade.Copy !req
149. Oh.Copy !req
150. There was a parade for me,Copy !req
151. but there was no parade
for Carly.Copy !req
152. I want to give her
a parade.Copy !req
153. I'll continue reading.Copy !req
154. Wait, Shaun,
reading's a great start,Copy !req
155. but Carly's a person.Copy !req
156. You need to communicate with
her, ask her what she likes.Copy !req
157. Yes. I'll make an extensive
list of questions.Copy !req
158. It's not just about
questions and answers.Copy !req
159. Nonverbal communication
is pretty key in this area.Copy !req
160. I'm not good with
nonverbal communication.Copy !req
161. Watch her reactions.Copy !req
162. See what Carly
responds to.Copy !req
163. You'll figure this out.Copy !req
164. Mrs. Reznick,
I'm Dr. Park.Copy !req
165. This is Dr. Murphy,
Dr. Browne.Copy !req
166. How are you feeling?Copy !req
167. Excellent.Copy !req
168. And flattered
that three surgeonsCopy !req
169. are here to check on me.Copy !req
170. They're curious.Copy !req
171. About what monster
created me.Copy !req
172. I'm sure that's not true.Copy !req
173. Morgan, you're smart and nice
and perfectly normal.Copy !req
174. I don't think she's
all of those things.Copy !req
175. You guys here
to take her vitals,Copy !req
176. check her
for any deficits,Copy !req
177. and maybe let her knowCopy !req
178. that she's just gonna keep
getting worse and die?Copy !req
179. Your daughter is right,
Mrs. Reznick.Copy !req
180. If you don't...
Dr. Browne, the day liliesCopy !req
181. go so well
with your eyes.Copy !req
182. Please take them.Copy !req
183. This variety
is from the Himalayas.Copy !req
184. Please.Copy !req
185. I really am grateful
to you all.Copy !req
186. I'm asking other people
to take over my cases.Copy !req
187. Check your in-box, and you'll
see the three I've given you.Copy !req
188. In your language,
the word "ask"Copy !req
189. must mean
something different.Copy !req
190. You're a caring,
empathetic person,Copy !req
191. and my mother is sick.Copy !req
192. As long as we're having
a moment of honesty,Copy !req
193. why do you hate
your family?Copy !req
194. You told me your mother
was a cardiologist.Copy !req
195. No, you told me my mother
was a cardiologist.Copy !req
196. I can't correct
all your mistakes.Copy !req
197. Was that the mother
you wanted to have?Copy !req
198. WOMAN ON P.A.:
Cardiac perfusionist,
call the cath lab.Copy !req
199. I used to daydream
my mother was a lawyer.Copy !req
200. That's just weird.Copy !req
201. I'm Oliver.Copy !req
202. I have a malignant peripheral
nerve sheath tumor,Copy !req
203. so I've only got
six months to live.Copy !req
204. I'm Dr. Melendez.Copy !req
205. What happened
to your foot?Copy !req
206. Skydiving.Copy !req
207. First time.Copy !req
208. They coached me how to roll,
but it didn't quite work out.Copy !req
209. He rented a plane.Copy !req
210. A small one.Copy !req
211. All the classes were full.
I did not want to wait.Copy !req
212. You should've come with me.Copy !req
213. I'm afraid of heights.Copy !req
214. So was I.Copy !req
215. Not anymore.Copy !req
216. Hmm.Copy !req
217. Nothing's broken.
Ice it tonight.Copy !req
218. Try to stay off it
for a few days.Copy !req
219. I'll give you
12 hours.Copy !req
220. Lots to do, so I might
be okay with limping.Copy !req
221. As long as I'm here,Copy !req
222. can I get vaccinated
for tropical diseases?Copy !req
223. Thinking about
moving somewhereCopy !req
224. the weather will be perfect
for the next six months.Copy !req
225. The dry season in Costa Rica
is just beginning.Copy !req
226. Excellent.Copy !req
227. I've always wanted
to see Costa Rica.Copy !req
228. They have
mantled howler monkeysCopy !req
229. that make this haunting call
at dawn and dusk.Copy !req
230. Wouldn't that be great
to wake up to?Copy !req
231. Oliver...Copy !req
232. Skydiving
doesn't bring happiness.Copy !req
233. Neither do monkey howls.Copy !req
234. You gonna tell a dying guy
he can't do what
he wants to do?Copy !req
235. No.Copy !req
236. Get me the shots.Copy !req
237. What happened to the patient
who was in here?Copy !req
238. She checked herself out.Copy !req
239. I knew I had to be
in early,Copy !req
240. so I tried
not to wake you.Copy !req
241. Appreciate it.Copy !req
242. I've brought youCopy !req
243. a jelly doughnut
and coffee...
Thank you.Copy !req
244. to celebrate
last night's breakthrough.Copy !req
245. What breakthrough
was that?Copy !req
246. Last night.Copy !req
247. You had a parade.Copy !req
248. During lunch.Copy !req
249. You made a lot of noise.Copy !req
250. One fairly loud noise...
A moan.Copy !req
251. Oh.Copy !req
252. Right, right.Copy !req
253. You had your elbow
on my hair.Copy !req
254. I had a great time
last night,Copy !req
255. and I really appreciateCopy !req
256. how much effort you put
into my happiness.Copy !req
257. But no parade.Copy !req
258. Parades
aren't always required.Copy !req
259. I'll keep working on it.Copy !req
260. Cassie,
stay in Hong Kong.Copy !req
261. It would be ridiculous
to miss the premiere
of your symphonyCopy !req
262. because of
a medical glitch.Copy !req
263. I have to go.
Your sister's here. Bye.Copy !req
264. You're in time
for brunch.Copy !req
265. I didn't know where
you were staying,Copy !req
266. if you'd left town,
if you'd gone home.Copy !req
267. I finally got your
new housekeeper
on the phoneCopy !req
268. and convinced her
I was your daughter.Copy !req
269. She said you
never mentioned me.Copy !req
270. Oh, Blanca's
very forgetful.
Pull up a chair.Copy !req
271. Your brother's
out getting salmon.Copy !req
272. Ariel's here?
He got great news.Copy !req
273. Million-dollar commission...
A bronze piece on the mall.Copy !req
274. I'm thrilled.Copy !req
275. Can we talk about the fact
that you're dying?Copy !req
276. No.Copy !req
277. I'm having
a good arthritis day.Copy !req
278. Why shouldn't
I feel happy?Copy !req
279. You're so lucky you didn't
inherit anything from me.Copy !req
280. Morgan.Copy !req
281. I thought Mom ditched
the medical police.Copy !req
282. Right, the bad guys trying
to keep her alive.Copy !req
283. We've all tried to get her
to change her mind,Copy !req
284. but you know
what she's like.Copy !req
285. I'm using
a little srirachaCopy !req
286. just to throttle
your taste buds.Copy !req
287. Thank you.Copy !req
288. I've been strategizing
with Cassie via e-mail,Copy !req
289. trying to figure out a way
to convince Mom...Copy !req
290. Did it occur to either of you
to mention any of thisCopy !req
291. to the only doctor
in the family?Copy !req
292. Plenty of doctors
already involved.Copy !req
293. And you barely
consider yourself
part of this family.Copy !req
294. You exclude me,
and it's my fault?Copy !req
295. Morgan, in high school,
kids kept askingCopy !req
296. about my parents,
the spies.Copy !req
297. And my friend Joel
at GeorgetownCopy !req
298. said you told people
your parents were
in the Peace Corps.Copy !req
299. And that you
were an only child.Copy !req
300. I got tiredCopy !req
301. of fielding questions
about my famous mother.Copy !req
302. It doesn't mean...
Only child.Copy !req
303. You're offended that you
weren't in the family
I completely made up?Copy !req
304. I got tired of hearing
"Your mother is so talented.Copy !req
305. "How wonderful
your brother's an artist.Copy !req
306. "How amazing
Cassie writes music.Copy !req
307. "What do you do?"Copy !req
308. Mom!Copy !req
309. Grab a towel.Copy !req
310. It's not just about
what you do physically.Copy !req
311. It's about setting a scene,
offering inspiration.Copy !req
312. I mean, do you know
what movies she likesCopy !req
313. or what actors
she thinks are sexy?Copy !req
314. She likes
the Alien movies.Copy !req
315. Something else?Copy !req
316. She loves Outlander.Copy !req
317. That is a good idea.Copy !req
318. Where the hell is everybody?Copy !req
319. Complex partial seizure.Copy !req
320. Cut her finger off
with an electric knife.Copy !req
321. Knuckle's still there,
but we need to get
her to an O.R.Copy !req
322. Whoa, whoa!
No one touches that
but the surgeon.Copy !req
323. Bloody towels
get thrown out
all the time.Copy !req
324. I'm not dumpster diving
while cells die.Copy !req
325. DR. The last of
the circumferential sutures.Copy !req
326. DR.
Good capillary refill
in the fingertip.Copy !req
327. What if this wasn't caused
by the Cav Mals?Copy !req
328. First the bleeding,
then the seizure...Copy !req
329. Pretty typical progression.Copy !req
330. It's also possible
the bleeding
caused the seizure.Copy !req
331. Microbleeds can cause gliosis,
and that can cause a seizure.Copy !req
332. And if the seizure
was caused by gliosis,Copy !req
333. we could simply
remove that one bit
of damaged tissue.Copy !req
334. She'd still be terminal,
but...Copy !req
335. Shaun is right,
but he's wrong.Copy !req
336. Volume!Copy !req
337. Shaun's idea
could stop the seizuresCopy !req
338. and let her keep painting
for the time she has left.Copy !req
339. That's something
she'll agree to.Copy !req
340. Which is why he's wrong.Copy !req
341. If she stops having
the seizures,Copy !req
342. there's no way she'll have
the lobectomyCopy !req
343. that will save her life.Copy !req
344. We don't choose procedures in
order to manipulate patients.Copy !req
345. No, we choose proceduresCopy !req
346. based on what will have
the greatest benefit.Copy !req
347. Dr. Melendez, I'd like
to excuse myselfCopy !req
348. to speak with
the patient's daughter.Copy !req
349. Please.Copy !req
350. I know not disclosing
a treatmentCopy !req
351. is borderline unethical,Copy !req
352. but when there is a cure that
the patient is ignoring...Copy !req
353. You don't want her
to die.Copy !req
354. Thanks
for the summation.Copy !req
355. But have you considered
it might be more than that?Copy !req
356. This cure, it doesn't come
without a cost.Copy !req
357. To your mother.Copy !req
358. But to you...Copy !req
359. if your mother loses
her artistic ability,Copy !req
360. your relationship changes.Copy !req
361. If she loses the thing
she lords over you,
she...Copy !req
362. Maybe she'd be nicer.Copy !req
363. You hate the way
she looks at you.Copy !req
364. But that is who she is.Copy !req
365. Let's try it Shaun's way.Copy !req
366. DR. Sorry about
this all-nighter,Copy !req
367. but sleeplessnessCopy !req
368. will increase the odds
of a seizure event.Copy !req
369. Which isn't pleasant,
but we need.Copy !req
370. All this equipment
will tell usCopy !req
371. if it was caused
by the Cav Mals
or by a remote microbleed.Copy !req
372. You want me
to put on the TV?Copy !req
373. I can find something
suitably irritating.Copy !req
374. Don't bother.
I'll be staying.Copy !req
375. "Cavernous malformations
may leak blood,Copy !req
376. "leading to
brain hemorrhage,
seizures,Copy !req
377. "loss of sensation,
risk of paralysis..."Copy !req
378. If you have to do this,Copy !req
379. can't you find some
Harry Potter or something?Copy !req
380. We can look forward.Copy !req
381. Or we can look back.Copy !req
382. Do you want to discuss what
a lousy mother you were?Copy !req
383. Baby, I know
that stress and angerCopy !req
384. can increase the chance
of a seizure,Copy !req
385. and you're
so sweet to try...Copy !req
386. Shall we go
chronologically?Copy !req
387. First day of preschool,
when you promised
to pick me up,Copy !req
388. but you forgot because
you were showing ArielCopy !req
389. how to underpaint
with raw umber.Copy !req
390. You wore a kilt?
How'd it go?Copy !req
391. We binge-watched
six episodes of Outlander,Copy !req
392. she fell asleep
on the sofa,Copy !req
393. so I came back
to work.Copy !req
394. Hi. I'm Oliver.Copy !req
395. I have six months to live.Copy !req
396. Hello, Dr. Murphy.Copy !req
397. I'm Dr. Park.Copy !req
398. I went out.
In a new Ferrari.Copy !req
399. But when I got home,
I started to feel... dizzy,Copy !req
400. sick to my stomach.Copy !req
401. Fainted and hit my head.Copy !req
402. I think I might have been
poisoned by the fugu fish.Copy !req
403. You ate a fish
you knew might kill you.Copy !req
404. You're emptying
the bank accounts.Copy !req
405. Only my retirement savings,
which I'm not gonna need.Copy !req
406. You don't have
fugu poisoning.Copy !req
407. I know because you're not
already paralyzed or dead.Copy !req
408. Ow.Copy !req
409. We'll keep you
for observation
and run some tests.Copy !req
410. Uh, how long?Copy !req
411. We have a room booked
in Costa Rica.Copy !req
412. Enough.Copy !req
413. I can't quit my job
and move to the jungle.Copy !req
414. Actually, you can.Copy !req
415. I won't stay here.Copy !req
416. You're gonna leave me?Copy !req
417. I've invited you
to come with me.Copy !req
418. I want us to see
Costa Rica together.Copy !req
419. You're choosing
the howler monkeys
over me?Copy !req
420. That's where I rank,
behind the monkeys?Copy !req
421. Bella, I love you.Copy !req
422. I've loved our 20 years
together.Copy !req
423. I want to see Costa Rica.Copy !req
424. I want you
to come with me.Copy !req
425. But I'm going either way.Copy !req
426. Go.Copy !req
427. I don't want to spend whatever
time is left with...Copy !req
428. Whoever you are now.Copy !req
429. I'm happy.Copy !req
430. I thought I made you happy.Copy !req
431. Jumping ahead. The day I won
the regional science fair,Copy !req
432. beating five
other schools,Copy !req
433. including those nerds
from Alston Prep,Copy !req
434. do you know what
you said to me?Copy !req
435. That you were so glad
I had something
to fall back on.Copy !req
436. I'm aware of your feelings
about me as a mother.Copy !req
437. I'm aware that our values
are different.Copy !req
438. It doesn't mean
I don't love you.Copy !req
439. I always have.Copy !req
440. It didn't matter
that you weren't creative.Copy !req
441. You seriously don't think
there's creativity
in what I do?Copy !req
442. I think that's something
technical people
tell themselves.Copy !req
443. But it's not
a moral judgment.Copy !req
444. It's the luck
of the draw.Copy !req
445. I'm an artist.Copy !req
446. You're a...Copy !req
447. Hard worker.Copy !req
448. August 12, 2014...
Times art section.Copy !req
449. I don't want to hear it.Copy !req
450. "Caroline Reznick's showing
at the ArmoryCopy !req
451. "is a lesson in what happens
when a once-interesting artistCopy !req
452. "sits too long
on her laurels."Copy !req
453. That woman hated me
for years.Copy !req
454. She was waiting
for an opportunity.Copy !req
455. "Bad judgment
doesn't begin to explainCopy !req
456. "what went wrong
with every strokeCopy !req
457. "of this ill-conceived..."Copy !req
458. I mean, really,
how many negative words
can you pile together?Copy !req
459. And she hasn't even gotten
to that partCopy !req
460. about that
Modern Madonna pieceCopy !req
461. that you
were so proud of.Copy !req
462. What... Remember what she...
What she called it?Copy !req
463. What was that?
Put that thing down!Copy !req
464. I'm sorry.
It's not gliosis.Copy !req
465. I went through that
for nothing?Copy !req
466. Mom, we eliminated
a possibility.Copy !req
467. That's not nothing.Copy !req
468. It's a day I spent
in this hospitalCopy !req
469. when I could've been
home working.Copy !req
470. How soon
can I be discharged?Copy !req
471. You need to rest
for a day.Copy !req
472. And then we
can say goodbye.Copy !req
473. If I only had
six months to live,Copy !req
474. I would not stop
being a surgeon.Copy !req
475. I would.Copy !req
476. I'd move from spa to spa,Copy !req
477. having massages and drinks
with little umbrellas.Copy !req
478. Then I'd throw a party
in the penthouse
of the Four Seasons.Copy !req
479. And after everybody left,Copy !req
480. I'd go into
the marble bathroomCopy !req
481. and painlessly
self-euthanize.Copy !req
482. I'd obviously leave
a big tip for housekeeping.Copy !req
483. You're very like
your mother.Copy !req
484. That's not something
I hear a lot.Copy !req
485. Well, he's right.Copy !req
486. You would reign like a queen
over your own death,Copy !req
487. insisting
on absolute control.Copy !req
488. I just meant you each
have a funny wayCopy !req
489. of picking things up
with both hands sometimes.Copy !req
490. I don't think this is
anatomically correct.Copy !req
491. Hmm.Copy !req
492. Hmm.Copy !req
493. Stereotactic laser ablation.Copy !req
494. You worked with
one of the people
who developed the technique.Copy !req
495. We never used to
call it that.Copy !req
496. I never liked that name.Copy !req
497. Also, it's never been used
in Cerebral Cavernous
Malformations.Copy !req
498. Not yet.Copy !req
499. It would allow us
to target the malformationsCopy !req
500. without needing to slice
all those cerebral fibersCopy !req
501. or remove a chunk
of my mother's brain.Copy !req
502. It would have to be applied
to each malformationCopy !req
503. with exact precision.Copy !req
504. Okay, so do that.
You can't.Copy !req
505. You're gonna make a mistake
on one or two of them.Copy !req
506. And then you got
more bleeding, seizures,Copy !req
507. you got inflamed malformations
growing out of control.Copy !req
508. You can.Copy !req
509. Even if I was still
a neurosurgeon,Copy !req
510. which I'm not,
I wouldn't.Copy !req
511. You don't get to quit
who you are.Copy !req
512. How long has it been
since you had your handsCopy !req
513. inside the source
of what makes us human?Copy !req
514. That flow, in surgery,
knowing every moveCopy !req
515. and just feeling
how right it is...Copy !req
516. That's peak existence.Copy !req
517. I'm sorry.
I'm not gonna do the surgery.Copy !req
518. Are you s...Copy !req
519. Are you scared
to pick up a scalpel?Copy !req
520. You had months of chemo
and radiation.Copy !req
521. Maybe it took its toll.Copy !req
522. E-Even a 10% drop
in performance
would be unbearable.Copy !req
523. Why risk finding it out?Copy !req
524. Get out.Copy !req
525. Skydiving?Copy !req
526. Fugu?Copy !req
527. And apparently
a yellow suit.Copy !req
528. Do you think a deadline
like he hasCopy !req
529. burns you down
to who you really are?Copy !req
530. Or does it just make you
nuts and desperate?Copy !req
531. Why can't it be both?Copy !req
532. Hmm.Copy !req
533. Okay, um...Copy !req
534. A little house
in the middle of nowhere.Copy !req
535. Two chickens.
One dog.Copy !req
536. Nobody who expects
anything from me.Copy !req
537. Nobody who is even verbal.Copy !req
538. I'm tired of trying
to fix myself.Copy !req
539. And I'm tired of being known
as a soft touch.Copy !req
540. Not buying it.Copy !req
541. There's no way
you would get a dogCopy !req
542. if you only had
six months to live.Copy !req
543. Wouldn't be fair.Copy !req
544. Okay, then I would foster
a series of rescue dogs.Copy !req
545. You said you're tired
of being a soft touch,Copy !req
546. and yet your fantasy
involves helping.Copy !req
547. We are who we are.Copy !req
548. It's called stereotactic
laser ablation.Copy !req
549. Never liked the name.Copy !req
550. He said
it's minimally invasive,
and if it works,Copy !req
551. it would save my lifeCopy !req
552. and allow me
to continue painting.Copy !req
553. If I win,
I win everything.Copy !req
554. And if I lose, it's over.Copy !req
555. When you first came
to see Dr. Glassman,
he didn't offer this option.Copy !req
556. Why not?Copy !req
557. Stereotactic laser ablation
is a new technique,Copy !req
558. and it's never been used
on a Cav Mal patient.Copy !req
559. So, he just
didn't think of it?Copy !req
560. But then it came to him?Copy !req
561. It was my idea.Copy !req
562. Dr. Glassman
didn't sugarcoat the risks.Copy !req
563. This is the last chance
you've got
to keep your art.Copy !req
564. I'm not going to complete
my work if I'm dead.Copy !req
565. No.Copy !req
566. But thank you so much
for trying.Copy !req
567. Why didn't you
back me up?Copy !req
568. I didn't know you were gonna
throw this crapshoot at us.Copy !req
569. Do you even listen
to what she's been saying?Copy !req
570. She wants
to finish her work.Copy !req
571. She could live
another 40 years,Copy !req
572. and her art
would grow with her.Copy !req
573. Don't pretend those words
mean anything to you.Copy !req
574. You don't give a damn
about art.Copy !req
575. Her family
could grow with her...Copy !req
576. Her children,
her grandchildren.Copy !req
577. You and her don't give
a damn about anything
except for art.Copy !req
578. You need to listen to me
and do what I tell you.Copy !req
579. This is why
we didn't call you.Copy !req
580. The competition
in that familyCopy !req
581. must have been
like a buzz saw.Copy !req
582. Okay.
Please.Copy !req
583. It's perfectly reasonable
to get out of a game
you can't win.Copy !req
584. You did everything right...Copy !req
585. Moved 3,000 miles,
found your own calling,Copy !req
586. a career people respect
and value.Copy !req
587. Actually, there's
a good comparative measure
for how people value things.Copy !req
588. We call it money.Copy !req
589. And my brother's already
a million dollars ahead.Copy !req
590. See how you went straight
to your brother?Copy !req
591. Did you ever think
he might be tired
of being your competitor?Copy !req
592. He won a long time ago.Copy !req
593. That's why I left that
dysfunctional world behind.Copy !req
594. Really?Copy !req
595. Because it seems to me
you re-created the competition
you grew up withCopy !req
596. the very first day
you got here.Copy !req
597. Shingles?
Like, from chicken pox?Copy !req
598. The virus was dormant,Copy !req
599. then your chemo suppressed
your immune system,Copy !req
600. and the virus woke up.Copy !req
601. It can be painful,Copy !req
602. but the treatment
is very simple.Copy !req
603. Do you want us
to call your wife?Copy !req
604. No, thank you.Copy !req
605. Just fix me up
and release me
into the wild.Copy !req
606. Back to the bucket list.Copy !req
607. She was right.Copy !req
608. I'm not the same person.Copy !req
609. I'm doing what we all
should be doing.Copy !req
610. We all want to cut loose,Copy !req
611. but we're
just too practical.Copy !req
612. If this had not happened,Copy !req
613. I might've lived to be 90,
never looking up.Copy !req
614. Dr. Murphy,
what do you want to doCopy !req
615. that you
just haven't done yet?
What makes you happy?Copy !req
616. I want to give Carly...
Shaun.Copy !req
617. Oh.Copy !req
618. I like a crisp apple.Copy !req
619. The way the sunlight
hits my bedsheetsCopy !req
620. in the morning
in a perfect square.Copy !req
621. I like the movement
of wind in leaves.Copy !req
622. And the way
the circumference
of a circleCopy !req
623. is always equal to pi
times the diameter,Copy !req
624. no matter what numbers
you put in.Copy !req
625. You like the happiness
of small things.Copy !req
626. Yes.Copy !req
627. Your happiness
is too loud.Copy !req
628. Shake your head again.Copy !req
629. Didn't he have
a muscle issue?Copy !req
630. His range of motion
seems good.Copy !req
631. All the better for zip-lining
in Costa Rica, right?Copy !req
632. Not right.Copy !req
633. We need more tests.Copy !req
634. I'm sorry.Copy !req
635. I know we want
the same things.Copy !req
636. I'd like
to show you something.Copy !req
637. DR. Neurons
that fire together
wire together.Copy !req
638. One neuron goes off,
exciting the next,Copy !req
639. creating a pathway
in the brainCopy !req
640. that wasn't
there before.Copy !req
641. Every time Mom
takes a brushstroke,Copy !req
642. every time
you use a chisel.Copy !req
643. It's like
we're creating ourselves
in the choices we make.Copy !req
644. We are creating this.Copy !req
645. It's beautiful.Copy !req
646. We target
each malformationCopy !req
647. with a thermal laser probe.Copy !req
648. Just the malformation.Copy !req
649. The trajectory
has to be perfect.Copy !req
650. You can't
paint over it.Copy !req
651. You could show this
to Mom.Copy !req
652. But from you,
she'll accept it.Copy !req
653. DR.
Inserting the laser probe
into the cooling catheter.Copy !req
654. Locked and loaded.
Ready to fire.Copy !req
655. DR.
Dr. Glassman,Copy !req
656. are you sure
of this location?Copy !req
657. It seems significantly farCopy !req
658. from what we saw
on her pre-surgical MRIs.Copy !req
659. You know what the brain
and breakfast cereal
have in common?Copy !req
660. Contents tend to shift
during transport.Copy !req
661. Yes, I'm quite sure.Copy !req
662. First ablation complete.Copy !req
663. Now we just have to do it
perfectly nine more times.Copy !req
664. It's gone?Copy !req
665. DR. Well, not quite.
But close.Copy !req
666. The recent infections
got into the tumor.Copy !req
667. Which allowed
your immune system
to find it.Copy !req
668. But they said it was
an aggressive cancer.Copy !req
669. What makes
a cancer aggressiveCopy !req
670. is its ability to evade
the immune system.Copy !req
671. That's no longer true
about yours.Copy !req
672. The tumor
has become small enough
to remove surgically.Copy !req
673. We can make an appointment
to do that in a few days,Copy !req
674. once the infection has
fully cleared your system.Copy !req
675. Meanwhile,
you can go home.Copy !req
676. Congratulations.Copy !req
677. Home?Copy !req
678. How do you feel?Copy !req
679. Tired.Copy !req
680. Of being in this place.Copy !req
681. Reasonable answer.Copy !req
682. Do you feel
your creativity's impaired?Copy !req
683. Isn't that the graphic you
use to sign your paintings?Copy !req
684. Thank you
for knowing that.Copy !req
685. Ariel was afraid
you'd feel vandalized.Copy !req
686. Ah, don't be silly.
We'll auction off the door.Copy !req
687. Mom, you've thanked
your doctors,Copy !req
688. but you haven't said
anything to Morgan.Copy !req
689. You know, getting out
of this mess intact,Copy !req
690. that's down to her.Copy !req
691. Oh, yes, I know.Copy !req
692. I owe you everything.Copy !req
693. Thank you...Copy !req
694. For saving my life.Copy !req
695. You're welcome.Copy !req
696. Our little plodder
came through.Copy !req
697. Not everybody
gets a parade.Copy !req
698. Maybe Carly
doesn't have them.Copy !req
699. Maybe I haven't
practiced enough.Copy !req
700. I've worked on
my surgical techniqueCopy !req
701. for hundreds of hours.Copy !req
702. You can't just take the pizza
out of the freezer and dig in.Copy !req
703. You have to put it
in the microwave first.Copy !req
704. Actually, Dr. Lim,Copy !req
705. a toaster oven
is better for the crust.Copy !req
706. She's not talking
about pizza, Shaun.Copy !req
707. Mm.Copy !req
708. Men your age
run out of patience.Copy !req
709. They turn off the microwave
before that pizza's ready.Copy !req
710. You want to give
a parade, Shaun?Copy !req
711. Yes.Copy !req
712. You want to give
a great parade?Copy !req
713. Are there differences
in parades?Copy !req
714. Some have balloons
and marching bands.Copy !req
715. Other parades
are sparsely attended.Copy !req
716. I want Carly to have
the best parade possible.Copy !req
717. I know you do.Copy !req
718. Just as you want to be
the best surgeon possible.Copy !req
719. When you're in the O.R.,
you commit totally.Copy !req
720. You persevere.
Everything else falls away.Copy !req
721. You focus entirely
on what you're doing.Copy !req
722. That's your superpower.Copy !req
723. Now I want you
to take Carly homeCopy !req
724. and work that parade routeCopy !req
725. and don't stop
until the band
begins playing.Copy !req
726. And then go 3% longer.Copy !req
727. I will.Copy !req
728. See you tomorrow.Copy !req
729. All that focus.Copy !req
730. Strangely intriguing.Copy !req
731. If I only had
six months to live,Copy !req
732. I wouldn't want to be
anywhere but where I am.Copy !req
733. Are you getting on?Copy !req
734. No.Copy !req