The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: Season 2, Episode 20

Directed by Rita Rogers Blye

Tim Russ as Eugene • Kenneth Tigar as Mr. Knotts • Michael Weiner as Kellogg Lieberbaum • Peggy Blow as Marge • Randy Josselyn as Student

Philip and Vivian welcome a '60s radical, who arouses the FBI's interest and influences Will and Carlton to take action over the firing of a nonconformist teacher.

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1. Come on, Uncle Phil, vogue!

2. oh, no, oh, no.

3. Will, sweetie, you've been snapping everything in sight

4. for days. What's going on?

5. It's a photography assignment, aunt viv.

6. I wanted to do something meaningful and artistic,

7. but wouldn't nobody get naked.

8. Morning, all.

9. Carlton, the photography assignment is due today,

10. and you haven't snapped a single picture yet.

11. Not to worry.

12. Carlton, this is a photography assignment,

13. not a prince video.

14. Madam, sir, there is a most perturbing person out here

15. who claims to be an old friend of yours.

16. Who is it, Geoffrey?

17. She didn't say.

18. She was too busy calling me

19. "a pathetic servant of the capitalist fat cats."

20. Marge! Marge!

21. Marge smallwood, give me a hug!

22. Look at you!

23. Woman, the last time I saw you

24. was that antiwar rally in '71.

25. You stole my afro comb.

26. Don't look like you be needing it now.

27. Hi. I'm Carlton. Hi, Carlton.

28. Hey, how you doing? I'm will.

29. My God, you look just like my old boyfriend El.

30. I take it El was blindingly handsome.

31. Who's El?

32. Eldridge cleaver.

33. Oh, was he related to Wally and the beav?

34. Hold it. You knew eldridge cleaver?

35. We were all in the movement together—

36. me, El, olafemi, and adesimbo.

37. Wait, hold up. Olafemi and adesimbo, too?

38. Man, that's unbelievable!

39. Who the hell are they?

40. Phil is olafemi, and Vivian is adesimbo.

41. Oh, o.K., and I'm abouta busta gutta.

42. you two have come a long way

43. from that fifth-floor walkup you had

44. when olafemi and I were in law school.

45. Boy, those were the days.

46. We marched on Washington,

47. staged sit-ins, held hunger strikes.

48. Would that have been between breakfast and lunch,

49. or lunch and dinner?

50. But we knew how to party, too.

51. Ooh! Did we ever!

52. Remember Woodstock— 20 of us tried to squeeze into that tent?

53. Vivian and I jumped into that lake naked!

54. I wasn't at Woodstock.

55. Oh, yeah.

56. Kids, did I tell you

57. that Marge and I went to school together,

58. that she graduated near the top of our law school class?

59. So, Marge, are you with a firm or on your own?

60. On my own. I'm still in the struggle.

61. That's dope, Marge. You never gave up on what you believed in.

62. I do my best.

63. Look right into the camera and say,

64. no. You can't take my picture.

65. I mean... Just wait for me to freshen up a little.

66. But speaking of pictures,

67. look at what I have here.

68. Oh, no!

69. Oh, come on.

70. Look at this. Ah!

71. Oh, my God. Who are those two weirdos?

72. And who is that ugly little kid in the dashiki diaper?

73. Those two weirdos are your father and I,

74. and that ugly little kid is you.

75. The bone in your hair's a good look for you, hilary.

76. Yeah, you've got sort of a yabba dabba do.

77. Mom, look at how short your skirt is.

78. Oh, your mother's legs made the miniskirt famous.

79. I have mom's legs.

80. Can I wear my skirt that short?

81. You have my legs, and the answer's no.

82. Marge, you must be tired after your trip.

83. You're staying with us,

84. and I don't want to hear any arguments.

85. You aren't getting any.

86. Just tell me where to plug in my 8-track.

87. Geoffrey will take your bags up.

88. I carry my own bag.

89. My brother, you have been oppressed,

90. repressed, and suppressed by capitalism.

91. Don't you know you can be free?

92. I have known freedom.

93. Don't like the health plan.

94. Geoffrey is not oppressed.

95. He's, uh, more... Our friend,

96. aren't you, Geoff?

97. Whatever you say...

98. Phil.

99. So you can see how ansel Adams

100. created a work of genius

101. just by using light and shadow,

102. which brings me to your work, geniuses.

103. All right. Let's see those homework assignments.

104. I like that.

105. Will, that wouldn't happen to be gum in your mouth, would it?

106. Yes, Mr. Knotts.

107. Oh, cool. Do you have any more?

108. Thanks.

109. That's good.

110. Carlton, this is...

111. It's a very...

112. It's...

113. What the hell is it?

114. Our assignment, sir.

115. You asked us to experiment with shadow.

116. I call this bunny on a wall.

117. And I'm going to call this midget at a desk.

118. Oh, uh, everybody, before you go,

119. there's something I'd like you to remember.

120. I think there's something very special

121. about every single one of you.

122. Class dismissed.

123. Oh, wait, hold up, hold up.

124. What about our trip to the mapplethorpe exhibit?

125. Don't you want our permission slips?

126. Mine ain't forged this time.

127. Cornflake, where's your permission slip?

128. Are you kidding? My parents won't let me

129. look at naked photos.

130. They thought the little mermaid was pornographic.

131. Turned me on.

132. I can't go see the mapplethorpe exhibit either.

133. Well, actually, none of us is going.

134. It seems that a lot of your parents don't approve of this exhibit,

135. and since going was my bright idea,

136. I've been fired.

137. Hold up. They can't do that.

138. This is an outrage.

139. They can't give us a new teacher now.

140. I've spent the whole semester sucking up to you.

141. Hey, Marge.

142. I still can't believe

143. that they fired the best teacher

144. that bel-air prep ever had.

145. You've been talking about this for two days.

146. Move on it.

147. You know what Malcolm said—

148. "by any means necessary."

149. You know, Marge, you're right.

150. I'm going to move on it.

151. I like having you around.

152. You get me all hype and everything.

153. Hey, I bet that's how you felt

154. when you roomed with Angela Davis, right?

155. Yeah. But we had a lot of huge arguments.

156. Word? About her political views?

157. No. About how she used to always put her name

158. on everything in the refrigerator.

159. Got on my nerves.

160. And I bet with that big old afro,

161. she probably had a lot of hair and afro sheen

162. all over the place.

163. Boy, don't get me started.

164. You know what?

165. I'm going to call you hasani.

166. You're just going to dis me right in my face?

167. No, no. It's Swahili.

168. It means handsome.

169. Ah. I like how you talk, Marge.

170. I like how you think, too.

171. I got a name for you, too.

172. It's too legit to quit.

173. Hey, that's pretty clever.

174. Did you just think of that?

175. Uh...

176. Yeah. Why, you like it?

177. Yeah.

178. Your Perrier...

179. My sister.

180. Hey, Marge, listen. We just got tickets

181. to the Roberta flack concert tonight.

182. We'll grab a bite to eat first.

183. No. I don't feel like going out tonight.

184. Oh, come on. You haven't been anyplace since you've been here.

185. No. I mean, we'll make it another time, o.K.?

186. Greetings, sister adesimbo.

187. Greetings, brother olafemi.

188. Power to the people.

189. Oh, ash.

190. You kind of look like winnie the pooh mandela.

191. Mom, daddy...

192. I am a depressed minority,

193. and I want my allowance increased.

194. No.

195. Then I'm staging a sit-in,

196. and I won't eat my peas.

197. You will eat your peas.

198. Come on, daddy.

199. Suppose Gandhi's parents treated him like this?

200. Gandhi ate his peas.

201. Then I shall spray-paint my demands

202. on the pool house wall.

203. We like to encourage free speech.

204. We certainly do.

205. Ashley!

206. Girl, are you crazy?

207. Get your butt back here!

208. You're on the Mike. What's your beef?

209. Oh. No, sir. He just stepped out.

210. Yeah. Sure. I'll tell him.

211. All right.

212. Ooh, that was the FBI

213. looking for Uncle Phil.

214. I wonder what they want.

215. They want me.

216. I better just flat out say this.

217. The FBI wants me.

218. What? The FBI?

219. Really? Could you put in a good word for me?

220. I'm thinking of applying.

221. She means they're after her, Carlton.

222. She's a fugitive.

223. We're harboring a fugitive?

224. No offense, Marge,

225. but I'm not going to prison over this.

226. No way am I sharing a cell

227. with a woman called big mama.

228. Marge, I don't understand. What do they want you for?

229. Take your pick. I helped a bunch of migrant workers

230. bust out of an internment camp,

231. broke into some federal buildings,

232. shredded a few files,

233. and made life pretty difficult

234. for the South African embassy back east.

235. Man... And I thought I was doing my part

236. by going to spike Lee movies.

237. Does the government know where you are?

238. They probably know I'm in the area.

239. They're checking out everybody I know.

240. It's cool, Marge. We're standing right behind you, right?

241. Marge, you know we love you,

242. but we've got a family to think about.

243. Why don't you give us some time to think this over?

244. I understand.

245. Marge.

246. We're behind you 200%.

247. Peace.

248. Operator, get me the FBI.

249. Carlton, what are you doing?

250. Come on, will, we're harboring a fugitive.

251. She's not a fugitive. She's our friend.

252. Yeah. And ever since she got here,

253. my diary has been a lot more interesting.

254. Well, I agree,

255. Ashley's diary is a lot more interesting,

256. but it's not worth going to jail over.

257. That is enough, Carlton.

258. Your mother and I will handle this.

259. I hate to sound paranoid,

260. but do we really know

261. if mom and dad are who they say they are?

262. Or if their names are really mom and dad?

263. Oh.

264. Oh.

265. Gentlemen, we all agree

266. that Mr. Knotts' dismissal is wrong.

267. But we have the rights to redress our grievances,

268. which is why I urge you to sign this petition.

269. Sometimes a man has to put his name on the line

270. for what he believes in.

271. "Ricky Ricardo"?

272. Lucy, you got some 'splaining to do.

273. Look, fellas, there ain't no point

274. in trying to reason with the man

275. when the man isn't trying to reason with you.

276. Right on.

277. What we gotta do is get up in his grill

278. and show him that we got the power.

279. Yes. Power to the people.

280. Say it loud.

281. I'm black, and I'm proud.

282. All right. My man cornflake got the spirit.

283. He a little confused,

284. but he got the spirit.

285. What we gotta do is take over this classroom.

286. We gotta nail that door shut

287. and chain ourselves together

288. to show them that we mean business— every one of us.

289. Now, y'all with me?

290. Will, I speak for all of us when I say...

291. Let's get the hell out of here.

292. Don't worry, will.

293. They'll never take us alive.

294. Hey, calm down, man.

295. I already bought my suit for the prom.

296. What we gotta do is nail that door shut.

297. I'll call the handyman.

298. Man, we radicals. We got to do things for ourselves.

299. You're right, my brother.

300. Where are the safety goggles?

301. Man, my Butler forgot to pack them.

302. Here. Here you go.

303. No. Here, man. It's easy.

304. Like this.

305. Yo, yo. You all right, man?

306. Yeah. I'm just hyperventilating.

307. This is so exciting.

308. We're like the mod squad

309. without Julie.

310. This ought to show them we mean business.

311. Yeah!

312. Will?

313. Yo.

314. What do we do now?

315. Uh...

316. We—we—we...

317. We chant.

318. Uh...

319. Attica!

320. Attica! Attica!

321. Attica! Attica!

322. Attica! Attica!

323. Attica.

324. Oh, man!

325. You smell that?

326. Damn! It's Chimichanga day in the cafeteria.

327. Yo, Marge, you shoulda seen—it was dope!

328. Me and cornflake barricaded ourselves

329. in Mr. Knotts' classroom.

330. Took the football team to break down the door.

331. When they came in, we was chanting,

332. "make love, not war!"

333. Right on, hasani!

334. But why were you chanting make love, not war?

335. We was kind of hoping

336. the cheerleaders would overhear.

337. Sweetheart, this is not a joke.

338. Your antics got you suspended for three days.

339. Now go to your room.

340. Looks like I've had quite an impact on your kids.

341. You're proud of getting a high school kid suspended?

342. If you mean am I proud to have told him

343. to do anything you have to

344. for what you believe in... Then, yes. I am

345. when you talk to will

346. about when we chained ourselves together at sit-ins,

347. you're only giving him the romantic part of the struggle.

348. Girlfriend, you're leaving out everything that went before it—

349. the leaflets, the petitions,

350. years of trying to work through the system.

351. The system doesn't work!

352. You have to blow the door down!

353. Looks like you forgot that.

354. You talk as if I wasn't there with you in Birmingham

355. facing dogs and fire hoses.

356. This is me—olafemi.

357. The same olafemi with you

358. the night Harlem went up in flames.

359. But now I have a family,

360. and I choose not to fight in the streets.

361. I have an office to fight from.

362. I've fought and won cases for fair housing,

363. affirmative action, health care.

364. I'm not ashamed to write a big fat check

365. for something I believe in.

366. That doesn't make me any less committed than you.

367. So don't you dare look down your damn nose at me, adebola.

368. Well...

369. I guess I've overstayed my welcome.

370. Marge.

371. You're welcome to stay here

372. until you can figure out where you want to go.

373. If you ever want to stop running,

374. viv and I will be here for you.

375. Psst! Marge!

376. Where Uncle olafemi?

377. He's in the study with adesimbo.

378. Oh, yeah.

379. Good thing he ain't in here!

380. 'Cause if he was,

381. I might just have to run back up to my room.

382. What you doing?

383. Now that the man's after me,

384. I think it's best for me to split.

385. You got to get back to your work.

386. I heard there was an anti-apartheid rally in D.C.

387. Yeah. I may swing by.

388. I knew you'd understand, will.

389. I'll be ready in 10 minutes.

390. For what?

391. I'm going with you.

392. If we going to be underground,

393. I'll probably need another name.

394. How about akbar shabazz Jenkins?

395. Will, you're a kid.

396. You belong at home.

397. You're only 17.

398. By the time you were 17,

399. you burned your first bra.

400. Baby, you can't do what I did.

401. But I could go get one of hilary's.

402. What I mean is you have to find your own way, will.

403. You know, when I was your age,

404. there weren't many doors open to us.

405. Some of them we had to blow open.

406. Because we did, you've got more opportunities.

407. Don't get me wrong.

408. I'm not saying things are perfect.

409. It's just that now you can fight our battles

410. in the board rooms, too,

411. and in the classrooms, the voting booths, and the courtroom,

412. just like your Uncle.

413. Wait. Hold up. Hold up.

414. I thought you said by any means necessary.

415. Right, but it's up to you

416. to figure out what's necessary.

417. And, will, when the courtroom doesn't work,

418. come find me.

419. You're a deep sister, adebola.

420. And you...

421. Are the future, hasani.

422. Agent Marcus Collins of the FBI.

423. If you need me,

424. I'll be upstairs saluting the flag.

425. Philip banks.

426. My wife Vivian.

427. How do you do? Hello.

428. I understand you're acquainted

429. with a woman named Margaret smallwood.

430. I've reason to believe she's contacted you.

431. Really? What would that reason be?

432. We tap every black person's phone

433. in the United States of America.

434. Just a little FBI humor.

435. But seriously, folks.

436. Harboring a fugitive can have grave repercussions.

437. Margery smallwood is a very close personal friend of mine.

438. I consider myself privileged to know her.

439. She was here but left this afternoon.

440. You have any idea where she was headed?

441. She said she was going to a nuclear power plant in Texas.

442. Ah, but then again, she did mention

443. a migrant workers' camp in salinas.

444. No, honey, she said she was going to

445. a voters' registration drive in biloxi.

446. Well, I thought she was just going to saks.

447. Oh, get the heck outta here.

448. Y'all mean she ain't in the bathroom?

449. I must say I'm disappointed in you, Mr. Banks.

450. I would've thought a man in your position

451. would be more aware of his responsibilities.

452. I know exactly what my responsibilities are.

453. Son, would you show agent Collins to the door?

454. By the way, I don't think we've met.

455. Ricky Ricardo.

456. Check out my horoscope.

457. "You will become a famous rapper

458. with your own TV show." That's dope, right/

459. those things are ridiculous.

460. What does mine say?

461. It says, "you are headed for a fall.

462. Beware. Accidents can happen."

463. Those things are so stupid.

464. Aah!

465. I wonder what I'll call my TV show.