The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: Season 2, Episode 15

Directed by Ellen Gittelsohn

Allen Payne as Marcus • Bobby McGee as Tommy • Dave Florek as Coach Smiley • Hugh Dane as Nelson • Ivory Ocean as Joe

On the basketball court, winning is everything to Will, as it is to an opponent from Malibu Prep, who can't afford to lose.

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1. It is so nice to have the house all to ourselves.

2. Ahh. It sure is.

3. Now, why is it that we wanted kids?

4. 'Cause of the way you get them.

5. Oh.

6. yeah!

7. All right.

8. Hey, aunt viv, Uncle Phil, we did it.

9. We won again. We're 4 and 0.

10. At our next game,

11. there's gonna be a recruiter from Georgetown university.

12. That's great, kids. Why don't you go upstairs, get my wallet,

13. and take your friends to the movies...

14. In Pittsburgh.

15. Sorry about the unexpected guests, dad.

16. And as manager of the team,

17. I take full responsibility.

18. That's very honorable, son.

19. You're grounded.

20. Philip, I think it's nice that the kids feel welcome

21. and want to be around us.

22. Actually, we got kicked out of 6 other people's cribs

23. and a 7-Eleven parking lot.

24. But you mind if we just hang around here

25. and order a couple pizzas or something?

26. Well, it is a very special night for you, will.

27. Sure.

28. All right. Thanks a lot, Uncle Phil.

29. You know what, man? This just feels great.

30. 'Cause I remember a time

31. when me and you didn't get along so good, you know?

32. All the yelling and screaming,

33. you telling me get on the first plane back to Philly.

34. Hey, but this is now,

35. and that was this morning.

36. yo, Ty, man, what took you so long?

37. Hey, you ever try going to 7 fast-food joints on a city bus?

38. No, I'm saving that for prom night.

39. You got your ribs.

40. Oh, man. You got your fried chicken...

41. Yes, sir.

42. Your hot wings...

43. Yeah.

44. Your smokey links,

45. your barbecued kielbasa,

46. and a bean pie fresh from the corner.

47. You want some hot sauce on that?

48. Oh, yeah.

49. Mmm.

50. Mmm.

51. Mmm!

52. Ooh.

53. Needs a little bit more.

54. Mm-hmm.

55. Will, you shouldn't be eating that garbage.

56. Everyone knows while you're in training,

57. no fats, no chocolate, and no women.

58. Then I should probably cancel my date

59. with that fat chocolate woman.

60. Will, you pitiful maalox poster child.

61. Get that grease buffet out of here

62. and let's go to the game.

63. Malibu prep is playing brentley high tonight,

64. and I want you to check out Malibu's guard,

65. Marcus Stokes.

66. I'm from Philly, homes.

67. Ain't nobody from Malibu gonna beat me in basketball.

68. Besides, I'm the greatest,

69. I'm a bad man, and I'm pretty.

70. Hoo! Hoo!

71. Will, you better listen to me

72. if you want me to be your manager.

73. Manager? I don't even want you to be my cousin.

74. I didn't hear that.

75. He said he don't even want you to be his cousin.

76. Fine. I'll just go to the game myself.

77. And when I get back,

78. I'll tell dad that little circle in your wallet's

79. not your lucky half dollar.

80. Hey, shall we take my car or the Volvo?

81. Malibu leads by 10.

82. Stokes passes to jamison,

83. jamison back to Stokes.

84. Stokes calls time-out.

85. I'll say one thing for Malibu.

86. The babes are primo delecto.

87. Surf's up.

88. And that ain't all.

89. That must be jam, 'cause jelly don't shake like that.

90. Mm-mm-mm-mm.

91. Yo, slimmie.

92. Need some help

93. with your African-American studies?

94. We can go to my place and let freedom ring.

95. We're in the final quarter of this ball game.

96. Stokes will take the ball out at half-court.

97. He passes it to Miller. Miller back to Stokes.

98. Stokes shoots the jumper.

99. Bingo! This kid doesn't miss.

100. Brentley down, shoots. No soap.

101. They've been throwing up dead bricks all night.

102. Pelicans rebound.

103. Marcus the great brings the ball downcourt.

104. He looks left, spins right.

105. Stokes is a one-man game!

106. Wow. Did you see Marcus Stokes jump?

107. Luck.

108. How was that luck?

109. He's lucky I'm not out there.

110. The brother's from Malibu.

111. The only tough break he had

112. is when the izod shop ran out of pink.

113. God, I hate when that happens.

114. Hey, coach smiley. What's going on?

115. Shut up, Smith. Can't you see I'm incognito?

116. Give me 20 laps first thing Monday.

117. Wait. I don't want you hurting your legs before the big game.

118. Banks, do his laps for him.

119. So what do you see, coach?

120. Not a damn thing, will.

121. It's part of the disguise.

122. Stokes has the ball.

123. He moves to his right.

124. Drive to the hoop.

125. A reverse lay-up. He scores!

126. Stokes dribbles.

127. Takes a pass. Takes it strong to the hoop again.

128. It's in!

129. Stokes has done everything tonight except sell hot dogs.

130. Stokes steals the ball, drives it...

131. Oh, my goodness! How sweet it is!

132. Marcus! Marcus! Marcus...

133. 3 seconds left.

134. Stokes with a jumper!

135. The game is over! The game is over!

136. In my opinion, Marcus Stokes is gonna be

137. one hell of a college basketball player!

138. Hey, Marcus. What's up, man? Will Smith.

139. You probably recognize me

140. from my picture in the sports page.

141. They said that I'm a superbly well-oiled machine

142. with the face of an angel

143. and the body of a God.

144. Maybe that's not an exact quote, but...

145. No, I don't recognize the face, brother,

146. but I do recognize them ears.

147. They covered up half of "dear Abby."

148. You had a pretty cute game out there tonight.

149. Oh, man, I'm glad you enjoyed it, brother,

150. 'cause I'm gonna do the same thing

151. to your butt next week.

152. Hey, I'm glad you're familiar with that,

153. because my butt is the only part of my anatomy

154. you're gonna see next week.

155. Oh, really?

156. Well, I'll bring a couple of umbrellas

157. for you and that scout,

158. 'cause I'm gonna be raining jump shots.

159. Hey, hold on, hold on. I'm the only reason

160. that scout is coming in the first place.

161. Only scout looking for you

162. trying to sell you some cookies.

163. Hoo! Hoo!

164. I like your style, will. I definitely like your style,

165. but let me be the first

166. to congratulate you ahead of time

167. for being voted most likely to bag my groceries.

168. Yeah? Well, I got just one thing to say to you, Mr. Hotshot.

169. You may be tall and good-looking

170. and a good basketball player,

171. but you're not that nice.

172. You back again for another pregame haircut?

173. How you doing, youngblood?

174. Ah, just a poor black man

175. trying to make it in bel-air, Mr. Nelson.

176. So what do you say, Joe?

177. Hey, hey. Somebody want to know the future?

178. The girls like it.

179. Yeah, I'm sure they do.

180. They can check their make-up in it.

181. I heard about your last game.

182. Boy, you was awesome.

183. How may points you score?

184. Uh, a mere 30 points,

185. an insignificant 18 rebounds,

186. a minuscule 14 assists.

187. In other words, for a small fee,

188. I might be persuaded to date y'all daughters.

189. Boy, you ain't never going to be that good.

190. Boy, back in my day,

191. we used to play basketball down in north Carolina.

192. We ain't had no sneakers,

193. so we played in high-top combat boots.

194. And we ain't had no basketball,

195. so we used a brick.

196. And we ain't had no hoop,

197. so cousin June bug

198. would hold his arms our in a circle like this.

199. And all day long,

200. we slam-dunked that brick off June bug's head.

201. Them was tough days, boy.

202. Good thing y'all wasn't into archery.

203. All right.

204. Now, here's my hero.

205. How you doing, Marcus?

206. What's up, everybody?

207. Yo, Joe, nice hair, man.

208. You keep saving these up,

209. one day you'll have a sideburn.

210. Just because the roof blew off

211. don't mean there ain't a log on the fire.

212. So, what is up, little Willie?

213. Ain't nothing to it, shorty.

214. I see you slummin', man.

215. What you doing down here in the hood?

216. Oh, man, this might be the hood to you, brother, but this is home to me.

217. What you talking about?

218. I live 2 blocks away from here, man. Born and raised.

219. I thought you lived out in Malibu.

220. Oh, I know you thought I did.

221. You thought I was some snot-nosed, candy pants preppie.

222. But I'm your worst nightmare

223. on the basketball court, money.

224. I'm a homeboy, just like you.

225. So, wait a minute.

226. You ride a bus 20 Miles a day

227. to Malibu prep?

228. Nope.

229. I run.

230. Bingo.

231. My main man.

232. Will, what you doin' back so soon?

233. You know my haircuts don't have no warranties.

234. Yeah, well, you know tonight's the big game.

235. I wanted to come in and get a special trim.

236. Hey, don't cut me too short, though.

237. I don't want you to give me no hair Jordan.

238. Well, if the people say you look pretty tonight,

239. be sure and mention Nelson's golden shears.

240. Our motto is, "it may be nappy,

241. but we'll make it snappy."

242. Hey, uh, has— has Marcus been around?

243. I've seen him once or twice.

244. He got his game face on?

245. Afraid so.

246. So he wasn't fronting, huh?

247. He really does live around here?

248. Yeah. He grew up right around the corner.

249. Come from a good family, too.

250. Got 6 of the prettiest sisters you ever see.

251. I believe that oldest one think I'm kind of cute.

252. Marcus has been playing ball at Harriet tubman park

253. since he was 6 years old.

254. Tough little rascal he was, too.

255. He used to play on the asphalt in his socks.

256. His mother couldn't afford sneakers, you know.

257. Sound like he was about as tough as I was.

258. I used to play barefoot.

259. On glass.

260. Why?

261. Marcus' mother's been working at the phone company

262. ever since I can remember.

263. And the kid's got so many jobs,

264. he could be Jamaican.

265. Well—well, my mom had about 4 jobs,

266. and I had 3 myself.

267. I was the only kid in preschool

268. who knew how to downshift a big rig.

269. Hey, and I'm gonna amaze that Georgetown scout tonight.

270. A few years from now, I'll be dunking basketballs in the nba,

271. and Marcus will be dunking doughnuts in a deep fryer.

272. Which pro team you want to play with?

273. My daddy says I can play with a pro team.

274. Not so fast, junior.

275. You got a ways to go yet.

276. Junior?

277. Yeah, will. This is my son.

278. This is my son.

279. My son.

280. My son.

281. Well, here we are.

282. Got the house all to ourselves.

283. All alone.

284. Just you and me.

285. Will, I got Tyson,

286. holyfield, Dr. J.,

287. Dr. Ruth, and Dr. Pepper.

288. Only in America.

289. I'm sorry things didn't work out at the doughnut shop.

290. And another thing—

291. take this $1,000 bill and wipe your baby's nose.

292. Go, will!

293. Go, will!

294. Go, will!

295. Go, will!

296. Go, will!

297. Go, will!

298. Go, will!

299. Go, will!

300. Aw!

301. Wait a minute. This is whack.

302. I don't even know if this baby is mine.

303. Hey, yo, da-da.

304. Come play with me.

305. Will.

306. Will.

307. Will.

308. Wake up.

309. Come on. It's time for the game.

310. Oh, man.

311. I dreamed you had hair like Don King.

312. Did I look taller?

313. So, you ready to show that scout

314. what we're made of?

315. Yeah, I guess so.

316. Guess so? What kind of attitude

317. is that for a champ? Come on!

318. Hey, Carlton.

319. You think it's rough having a kid?

320. I don't think so. You just hand out cigars

321. and hope its head rounds out.

322. All right, men, we've come a long way,

323. and I just want to say good luck.

324. That, and pass it to will.

325. 1, 2, 3, bel-air!

326. Come on, guys!

327. All right. It's showtime, baby.

328. Yes, sir. And I am the master of ceremonies.

329. And here's the tip-off.

330. Look at will Smith leap! He passes the ball to George.

331. George back to Smith.

332. And Smith scores first point for bel-air prep.

333. Marcus Stokes has the ball for Malibu.

334. Driving the Lane and... Scoring!

335. Stokes looking for the open net,

336. takes it for 2 points.

337. Will Smith coming right back at it.

338. In your face!

339. Call the fire department. Stokes and Smith are smokin'.

340. Smith steals the ball.

341. Driving the Lane.

342. A lay-up.

343. He's poetry in motion.

344. Marcus has the ball.

345. He drives.

346. Switch! It's been Smith and Stokes all night.

347. Jump shot will Smith. He's got 30 points.

348. Stokes shoots the jumper.

349. It's money in the bank.

350. Stokes falls back on defense.

351. This has been an old-fashioned barn-burner.

352. Bel-air prep by 2 points.

353. Holy mackerel, another 2 points for will Smith.

354. Stokes has got it, right back at him.

355. He drives... And lays it in.

356. These two kids are magnificent.

357. Have you ever seen anything like it?

358. Smith dribbles upcourt.

359. He stops, he tosses, it rocks!

360. 2 points!

361. This one is too close to call,

362. and the fans are loving every minute of it.

363. Stokes looks tired, but there's fire in his eyes.

364. He'll be playing the game of his life.

365. Stokes shoots. In your face, will Smith!

366. It doesn't get any better than this.

367. Smith bringing the ball downcourt,

368. his face a mask of concentration.

369. He drives toward Stokes.

370. He fires...

371. In your face, Marcus Stokes!

372. Bel-air prep by one point,

373. time-out with 15 seconds left.

374. All right, men, now think defense.

375. Will, Stokes is your man.

376. I want you to stick to him like white on rice.

377. Sorry. It's a bad analogy.

378. All right.

379. Let's go.

380. 1, 2, 3, bel-air!

381. Will?

382. Hey, what's going on, Uncle Phil?

383. You ok?

384. Yeah. Yeah. You know.

385. Guess I really blew it

386. in front of that scout tonight, huh?

387. Son, you can't come down on yourself for losing.

388. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.

389. There'll be other scouts.

390. I just felt like I really let everybody down.

391. My game just wouldn't come together tonight.

392. Trust me, will. I know it doesn't feel like it right now,

393. but what they say is true—

394. winning really isn't everything.

395. Yeah, well, it is to Marcus Stokes.

396. How you doing, sir?

397. I'm Marcus Stokes.

398. I'm Philip banks, will's Uncle.

399. Nice to meet you.

400. You played a hell of a game, son.

401. Thank you, sir.

402. Will, we'll see you at home, huh?

403. Man, I was waiting around for you in the locker room.

404. Why did you let me go around you like that?

405. What, you trippin', man? I didn't let you go around me.

406. I know your game, will. You let me go around you.

407. If you were going to play like that,

408. why didn't you just sit in the stands?

409. Look, come on, man, look.

410. You impressed the scout,

411. you'll go to a division one college,

412. then you'll go pro.

413. You'll be able to give your kid everything, man.

414. What you beefin' about?

415. Oh, I get it. 'Cause I got a kid,

416. I'm some kind of charity case?

417. Well, let's get something straight, homey.

418. My situation does not define who I am.

419. I define who I am.

420. Look, man.

421. I got lucky, all right?

422. I got a rich Uncle.

423. A lot of brothers come from where we come from,

424. I mean, they don't have the same opportunities, man.

425. That's your ticket.

426. You know something, my bel-air brother?

427. You've been watching too many made-for-TV movies.

428. Hey, look, man. I'm from Philly.

429. I know it ain't easy to make it.

430. What, to make it to the pros?

431. It's damn near impossible.

432. Look, I'm better than good...

433. Till I break my ankle, that is.

434. Then I ain't worth a dime.

435. I'm not depending on this,

436. I'm depending on this.

437. My b-ball scholarship is gonna get me a free education

438. in engineering

439. so that I can provide for my family with my mind.

440. You don't even want to play pro?

441. Yo, I ain't no fool, now.

442. If somebody offer me $1 million to dribble a basketball,

443. you better believe I'm gonna take it.

444. With all due respect, my brother,

445. I don't think nobody gonna offer you no million dollars.

446. What I'm saying is, the odds of that happening are slim.

447. Me getting an education that's gonna last me a lifetime

448. are the odds that I'm taking.

449. You know, you a pretty deep brother.

450. Yeah.

451. And I'm a better ballplayer than you, too.

452. Ah ha. Them's be fightin' words.

453. Let's do it.

454. I thought you'd never ask.

455. That's what you want, right?

456. That's what I want.

457. You sure that's what you want? You got it.

458. You sure this is what you want?

459. Give it to me as hard as you can.

460. You got to go home and tell 'em what I did to you, right?

461. I'm gonna give this to you real hard. I realize you're smooth.

462. Ooh, ooh, ooh. Where you going? Aah!

463. Oh, no!

464. Hey, look at you.

465. Smith got the ball. Smith got the ball.

466. He dribbles, he drives,

467. between the legs stuff,

468. he pops, and it's good!

469. Oh! Smith hurt his ankle!

470. He hurt his ankle!

471. He can't play!

472. Smith wins one to nothing.