1. Geoffrey,
have you seen will?
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2. Master William
sits in his room
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3. sadly staring
out the window,
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4. quiet as
a church mouse.
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5. Hasn't spoken a word
for hours.
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6. What a shame.
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7. Oh, poor homesick baby.
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8. I have an idea.
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9. If will
is that homesick,
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10. let's send him home.
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11. All he's been talking about
is Philadelphia.
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12. I hope these Philadelphia
cheesesteaks cheer him up.
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13. I don't know
what you see in
those concoctions.
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14. Which is why you only
ate five of them?
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15. Oh, will,
we know you're homesick,
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16. so we got you something.
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17. Oh, wow. Thanks.
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18. Oh, thanks a lot!
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19. What is it?
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20. It's a sandwich
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21. composed of cheese, steak,
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22. and a croissant
de boulanger
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23. from the cafe antoinette
in Beverly hills.
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24. It's a Philadelphia
cheesesteak, will.
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25. Nice try,
Uncle Phil,
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26. but this isn't
a Philadelphia
cheesesteak.
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27. See,
look at the bag.
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28. No grease stain.
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29. If this
were authentic,
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30. you could see
right through
the bag by now.
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31. I'm sorry.
I'll dispose of it.
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32. I'll throw it out.
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33. I'll dispose of it,
Ashley.
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34. You know where you get
the best cheesesteaks
in Philly?
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35. Pat's steaks
on passyunk Avenue.
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36. Me and my buddy ice tray
went there every Friday.
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37. We used to steal—
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38. I mean, um...
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39. We would enjoy them
there often.
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40. Isn't ice tray the one
you're always talking about?
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41. Did I ever tell you
about that winter?
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42. Ice tray grabbed
the back of a bus,
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43. and it was so cold,
his face got stuck.
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44. He couldn't get off
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45. till he hit a bump
on the bridge.
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46. That's a story
we can all relate to.
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47. Cut it out, Philip.
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48. He misses his friend.
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49. Ice tray's
more like my brother.
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50. Why don't we fly him out
for a visit?
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51. You mean it, aunt viv?
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52. Word up!
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53. This will be
cold stupid
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54. on the serious
tip.
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55. What did you say,
young lady?
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56. Oh, I said this is quite
an exceptional idea, daddy.
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57. Peachy keen, even.
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58. Later, my man.
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59. Wonderful.
First will,
now Ashley.
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60. I can't wait
till ice box
gets here.
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61. No, no. Ice tray,
Uncle Phil.
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62. Oh. Ice tray.
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63. I apologize.
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64. Ice box would be
an idiotic name.
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65. Well, yeah, it would.
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66. This is going
to be great.
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67. I can't wait to show him
the strange sights of L.A.
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68. I'll take him to Disneyland,
to marineland—
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69. dad, I need $200.
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70. I'll take him
to hilaryland.
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71. Why do you need $200,
hilary?
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72. For books.
I'm changing majors.
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73. To what?
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74. Communications.
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75. Exactly
what does that entail?
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76. Well, you know.
It's like...
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77. You know, it's...
Communications,
you know?
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78. It's, like,
the study of...
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79. Communicating, o.K.?
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80. Why do you want
to major in that?
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81. Because
I'm good at it.
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82. I presume this is
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83. the official
ice tray greeting party.
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84. Ding-ding-ding
ding-ding-ding!
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85. Tray!
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86. Prince!
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87. Homey, homey—
oh! Get in there!
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88. Guys!
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89. Guys!
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90. Guys!
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91. You're going
to hurt each other.
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92. That's o.K., Vivian.
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93. Let's see
where this goes.
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94. We didn't hear you
come in.
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95. Geoffrey, did you
leave the door open?
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96. Well, no.
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97. We must have
left it unlocked.
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98. Well, no.
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99. You still got it, man.
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100. I'm Vivian,
will's aunt.
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101. Will, introduce ice tray
to your family.
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102. This is my cousin Ashley.
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103. Hi.
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104. This is my bodyguard
Geoffrey.
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105. All of this
is my Uncle Phil.
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106. Remember we used to say
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107. that daffy duck must have
a brother somewhere?
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108. Uh-huh.
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109. Meet my cousin Carlton.
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110. Can't
touch this.
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111. Geoffrey, take ice tray's
luggage to his room.
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112. Certainly, madame.
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113. So you're also
a disadvantaged,
inner-city youth,
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114. I hear.
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115. Yo, man,
what's with him?
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116. It's a tan.
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117. What up on
the schoolyard, huh?
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118. Aw, school, man.
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119. I don't bother it,
it don't bother me.
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120. You don't
go to school?
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121. I've been held back in
the 10th grade three times.
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122. Three times?
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123. See, my motto is,
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124. when I find
a grade I like,
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125. I stick with it.
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126. Education is the mortar
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127. that builds
the temple of success.
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128. That's what I
personally think.
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129. Like who cares?
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130. What's up with smooth,
jocko, and o-money?
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131. Smooth and jocko
got their own
singing group,
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132. and o-money
got his hair cut
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133. to look like
the Chrysler building.
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134. That's good,
though, man.
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135. That
mount rushmore thing
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136. was not working.
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137. This is dope, man.
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138. I'll just kick back,
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139. let somebody else
work.
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140. Excuse me, young man.
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141. In this house, everyone
carries his own weight.
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142. Too easy.
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143. Come on, daddy.
Tray's on vacation.
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144. See, my motto is,
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145. lord, if there's
anything like work
around my heart,
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146. please remove it.
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147. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
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148. I smell
something greasy.
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149. Too easy.
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150. Doom digga digga doom
dh-ah-ah.
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151. Yo, a cheesesteak!
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152. This is
the real deal.
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153. Yo, yo, yo, man.
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154. Uh, could I get $100?
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155. For what?
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156. To pay
the limo dude.
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157. You took a limo?
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158. Prince said
y'all was loaded,
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159. and when in Rome,
do as.
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160. $100?
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161. I got a cash flow
problem.
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162. You see, my Korean
Gucci bags,
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163. they ain't been
moving lately.
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164. Tray, let's pay
the dude.
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165. The Blake sisters
still live on
43rd street?
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166. They got their own
900 number now.
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167. Sheesh! He's some piece
of work, huh dad?
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168. We're gettin a rottweiler.
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169. I know he seems a
little rough around the edges
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170. but I think we should
all give him a chance.
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171. When you really look at it
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172. how different is
ice tray from Carlton?
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173. With all due respect, mom.
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174. I think he's a little fonder
of the 10th grade than I.
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175. Ha ha ha ha!
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176. Wait a minute.
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177. Hold up, hold up.
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178. What about that girl
you went out with—
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179. latiqua?
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180. Man, that girl
was ugly.
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181. Ugly? You crazy, man.
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182. She was so ugly,
she was oogly.
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183. She was so ugly,
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184. Freddy krueger
had nightmares
about her.
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185. At least she was smart.
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186. That girl you was with—
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187. Stacy!
Stacy!
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188. Yeah.
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189. Yo, that girl
was so dumb,
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190. it took her a hour
to cook minute rice.
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191. Whoa. Wait a minute.
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192. Let's talk
about skinny girls.
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193. Who's skinny?
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194. That one girl
Julie—
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195. she was so skinny,
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196. you could tie a rope
around her head
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197. and use her like
a tetherball pole.
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198. Hold it.
Back to Stacy.
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199. Yeah, o.K.
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200. Stacy was so dumb—
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201. how dumb was Stacy?
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202. Stacy was so dumb,
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203. that she took
the Pepsi challenge
and chose jif.
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204. Aw, this is dope, man.
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205. Look at this.
Crystal, China dogs,
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206. a book.
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207. You know people rich
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208. when they got this stuff
you got no use for.
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209. Crime and punishment.
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210. That's just
some tired old book
Carlton's reading.
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211. Oh, really?
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212. "From the library
of master William Smith."
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213. Who's tired now, homey?
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214. They're forcing us
to read that at school.
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215. I ain't reading it.
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216. Wait. This is
your handwriting.
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217. "Intriguing duality"?
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218. Same old prince, man.
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219. When I met you,
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220. you carried books
in pizza boxes
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221. so nobody would know
you studied.
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222. That was cool
till them guys
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223. jumped me trying
to steal my pizza.
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224. Yo, they was upset.
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225. Oo-wee.
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226. You got a good deal
here.
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227. Don't blow it.
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228. I'll go grab us
some cheesesteaks.
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229. All right.
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230. H-hi.
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231. Hi.
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232. Vivian, I think
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233. you're blowing this
out of proportion.
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234. Tell me the story again.
Just the facts.
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235. I'll give you
a transcript, Philip.
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236. Tray—hi, hilary—hi.
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237. What could she
possibly see in him?
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238. Well, he's got
a nice smile
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239. and... Cool hair.
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240. Hair?
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241. I thought
it was a hat.
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242. I think I should have
gotten a larger tattoo.
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243. Tattoo?
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244. I got a tattoo
of tray's initials.
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245. Where?
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246. Don't worry,
Mrs. Banks.
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247. Nobody
will see it.
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248. I'll put this stuff
upstairs.
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249. I'll go with you.
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250. So will I.
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251. Aunt viv, you got
to be proud of yourself.
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252. Well, pride doesn't
quite capture it, will.
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253. It was your idea
to bring tray here.
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254. Hilary used to have
such a sour face.
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255. I'd think,
she just needs
one good...
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256. Friend, aunt Vivian.
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257. He does seem like
an interesting
young man.
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258. He's joking around,
but he can be serious.
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259. Really?
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260. Seriously. If somebody's
chasing him,
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261. he can Jack a fence
like that.
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262. But if somebody catch
him, it don't matter.
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263. He's got a crazy
rabbit punch,
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264. like bang!
You out of there.
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265. Let's go check out
that swimming pool,
prince.
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266. See you later, babe.
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267. O.K., icy.
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268. It's nice to see
you and ice tray
getting along.
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269. I'm sorry he couldn't
stay longer.
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270. I've figured it out.
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271. He can visit
every other weekend.
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272. When 10th grade
lets out,
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273. he can stay here.
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274. Daddy can get him
a job at the office.
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275. What job could he have
in the law firm?
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276. I don't know. Lawyer?
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277. Anyways, mom,
don't worry.
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278. This is our problem,
not yours.
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279. The only thing
I want to say
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280. is thank you.
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281. For what?
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282. Well, you, like,
saw past his rough,
tough exterior,
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283. and you welcomed him
into our home.
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284. I'm so
proud of you, mom.
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285. I just want to share
my joy with you.
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286. I haven't been
this happy
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287. since I bought my
giorgio Armani suit.
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288. Philip!
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289. This is serious.
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290. Hilary
wants him to live
in our pool house.
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291. That shouldn't
matter to you.
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292. You're the one
who invited ashtray.
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293. In fact,
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294. let's invite some more
of will's friends out.
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295. Let's put out
a neon sign in front
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296. that says
"homeboy hotel."
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297. That's it.
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298. I want him out
of this house.
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299. You're making
the classic mistake.
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300. Don't you know that?
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301. I have
the perfect solution
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302. for dealing
with Mr. Ice pick.
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303. You do?
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304. My, uh...
Street savvy...
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305. Should not
be taken lightly.
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306. She's rebelling
against us.
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307. So?
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308. Any hostility
will drive her
closer to him.
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309. We have to welcome him
into the family,
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310. take him out,
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311. smother him
with acceptance.
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312. Once the element
of rebellion is gone,
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313. the relationship
will lose its appeal.
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314. What if that
doesn't work?
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315. Oh, it'll work.
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316. You two make such a lovely,
lovely couple.
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317. Dad, has mom been drinking?
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318. Nonsense Carlton, she's just
being polite
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319. to our lovely house guest.
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320. Have you been drinking?
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321. Ay tray, check this.
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322. Oh, that's good man.
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323. 'Oww!'
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324. nice catch, lady.
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325. Oh God, tray you are
so funny.
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326. Isn't he funny?
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327. Not to me.
Of course, I'm sober.
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328. Hey, I think..
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329. um, escargot all around
for starters.
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330. - Snails.
- Oh, no no no.
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331. I don't eat nothing
that leaves a trail.
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332. Oh God, tray.
You sway me.
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333. He busts me off.
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334. Before we get started,
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335. I'd like
to propose a toast.
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336. Tray,
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337. since this is
your last night here,
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338. Vivian and I
would like to say
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339. that we're both
extremely happy
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340. that hilary's found
that special someone,
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341. that special love.
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342. I can just see
hilary and tray
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343. in their tiny
little love nest
in Philadelphia
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344. with the pitter-patter
of five little ice cubes.
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345. Hilary changing diapers
and preparing a lovely meal,
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346. while her loving husband
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347. is working his night job
on the corner
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348. as a Korean Gucci bag
representative.
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349. Hilary,
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350. this is for those wonderful
years in Philadelphia.
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351. I guess I'll be
driving home tonight.
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352. I am so happy.
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353. Dad, are you saying
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354. that you wouldn't mind
if tray and I got married?
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355. Mind? Mind?
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356. Did you hear that,
Vivian?
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357. Mind?
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358. Well, that's good.
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359. We got married
this afternoon.
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360. Hilary, no.
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361. No!
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362. How could you
do this to us?
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363. How could you
be so stupid?
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364. You've gone
and ruined your life.
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365. This boy doesn't care—
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366. mom, take it down
a thousand.
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367. It's only a joke.
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368. We didn't get married.
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369. We just wanted
to see what you'd do.
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370. See, baby, I told you
they'd flip.
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371. Homey, order me
three steaks and a salad.
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372. Come on, baby.
Let's dance.
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373. Got married.
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374. Ahem.
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375. Sir, master tray's
all packed
Copy !req
376. and ready to depart.
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377. Excellent, Geoffrey.
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378. Let's get him
on his way.
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379. Shall I
call for a car
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380. or just shoot him
out of a Cannon?
Copy !req
381. So, that really is
a wonderful restaurant,
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382. isn't it?
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383. Huh? Yeah.
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384. I think everybody
had a good time,
don't you?
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385. Uh-huh.
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386. I really enjoyed
meeting ice tray
this weekend.
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387. Anytime you want
to invite any of
your other friends,
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388. just let us know.
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389. You enjoyed it, huh?
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390. Oh, yeah. A lot.
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391. Wasn't hilary falling
in love with tray
Copy !req
392. the icing on the cake?
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393. I'm glad they had fun.
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394. It's just a shame
he had to leave
Copy !req
395. before he could
ruin her life.
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396. I'm sorry I said that.
Copy !req
397. But you meant it.
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398. It was cool
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399. as long as tray
was some clown
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400. to cheer me up.
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401. Will—
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402. when you found out
hilary liked him,
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403. you wanted him out.
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404. I'd expect that
from Uncle Phil,
not you.
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405. Hilary is my daughter,
will.
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406. And tray's
my best friend.
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407. We're from
the same neighborhood.
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408. We're the same person.
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409. If tray's not
good enough for you,
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410. I'm not.
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411. You're not
the same person.
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412. I know who I am.
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413. I can see
why you like ice tray.
Copy !req
414. He's a lot of fun.
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415. Everything's
a joke to him—
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416. school, work, people.
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417. He doesn't
care about anything.
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418. He always managed
to care about me.
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419. I'm glad
he's a good friend,
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420. but that doesn't
change who he is.
Copy !req
421. A young man his age
Copy !req
422. should be able
to do something
Copy !req
423. besides fight
and jump fences.
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424. You weren't there.
Copy !req
425. I know, but—
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426. whenever I'd bring
books home from school,
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427. the kids would jump me,
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428. so tray started
walking me home,
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429. and if he hadn't
been there
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430. to help me
jump those fences,
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431. then maybe
I wouldn't be here.
Copy !req
432. Well...
Copy !req
433. While he was busy
protecting your books,
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434. where the hell were his?
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435. What's that got
to do with anything?
Copy !req
436. I'm glad he cared
so much about you.
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437. But why doesn't he
care as much
about himself?
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438. 'Cause nobody
was there for tray.
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439. If he hadn't been there
to cover my back,
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440. maybe I wouldn't care
about myself either.
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441. And that would be
an awful waste.
Copy !req
442. I shall load
Mr. Tray's belongings
Copy !req
443. into the Cannon.
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444. I mean cab, madame.
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445. Yo.
Copy !req
446. Miss you
in the 'hood.
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447. Why don't you come
on back with me?
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448. No. I better
cool out here.
Copy !req
449. If Uncle Phil woke up
and I wasn't here,
Copy !req
450. he'd have
a nervous breakdown.
Copy !req
451. I'd recover, will.
Copy !req
452. I'm really going
to miss you,
ice tray.
Copy !req
453. Bye, Mrs. Banks.
Thanks for inviting me out.
Copy !req
454. Have a safe trip back.
Copy !req
455. Take care of yourself.
Copy !req
456. Thanks.
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457. Oh, snap. I forgot.
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458. I got a little
something for y'all.
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459. That's our China dog.
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460. Yeah.
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461. I figured y'all
were so nice to me,
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462. that, hey,
I don't need it.
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463. That was a joke.
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464. Babe.
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465. Tray,
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466. you've become
a part of my spirit
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467. that's never
been touched before.
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468. I feel a oneness
with you,
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469. and now that
you're leaving,
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470. I have this sense
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471. that life will be
empty, hollow,
and meaningless.
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472. Well, peep this, babe.
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473. See, I have
this first-class ticket.
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474. We could trade it
for two coach tickets,
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475. and you could come back
to Philly with me.
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476. Coach?
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477. Captioning performed by
the national captioning
institute, inc.
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