The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air 1x1

Directed by Debbie Allen

Helen Page Camp as Margaret Furth • John Petlock as Henry Furth

Aunt Vivian tries to mediate between her husband Philip and the newly arrived Will.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. Hey, Uncle Phil! Oh, man!

2. How are you doing?

3. I am not your Uncle Philip.

4. Oh, uh, my fault, man.

5. I must have got the wrong crib, hey, but..

6. Hey, yo, I didn't know so many brothers

7. living in this neighborhood.

8. We're doing alright, huh?

9. You have the right house.

10. I am Geoffrey, your uncle's butler.

11. Oh, okay, well, I.. Cheerio and all that rot.

12. Bring the horses round, would you?

13. If you will follow me

14. I will show you to your room, Master William.

15. Hey, man, it's cool if you just call me Will, man.

16. Master William

17. tradition dictates that a clean, unbreakable line

18. be drawn between a family and their butler.

19. Therefore, it is necessary

20. for the operation of a household

21. that you address me as Geoffrey

22. and I in turn address you

23. by your proper title. Master William.

24. Who are you, Robo-butler, man?

25. Come with me, Master William.

26. Yo, yo, G-G-G, let me rap to you for a second, man.

27. All this Master William stuff, man?

28. I'm not down with that, man, make it sound like

29. we're back on the plantation, we like..

30. "Massah William! Massah William!"

31. Let's come up with something better you could call me.

32. - What would you prefer? - Check this.

33. His Royal Freshness.. That's dope.

34. Master William, walk this way.

35. No.

36. - Willie! - Hey, Aunt Viv!

37. - Sweetie, hi. - How you doing?

38. Oh, my goodness. Let me look at you.

39. Turn around, honey, the last time we saw you

40. you were this funny little boy.

41. Now look at you.

42. Oh, my goodness. You are a man.

43. Well, that was the plan.

44. It is amazing. You certainly have grown, Will.

45. Well, we all have.

46. Did you enjoy the trip?

47. Oh, yo, the plane ride was stupid all over.

48. Excuse me?

49. No, I'm sayin', the plane was dope—

50. Excuse me?

51. No, stupid, dope..

52. Oh, no, that-that doesn't mean what you..

53. Um, how would he say..

54. The flight was really neat, yeah.

55. Geoffrey, would you take Will to his room, please

56. and help him get settled in?

57. - Yes, madam. - Nice seeing you.

58. Master William.

59. You got to love this guy, right?

60. Did you see the way he was dressed?

61. - What's wrong with it? - You hear that language?

62. 'Oh. We used slang when we were kids.'

63. Do you remember our first date?

64. You took one look at me and you said

65. "Vivian, that is a bad dress."

66. Now, you could have just said it was a good dress.

67. I could have if I liked it.

68. Actually, it was a bad dress.

69. That's stupid. Now, take it for whatever meaning you want.

70. - He's got you doing it. - Oh, Philip.

71. Cut him some slack, please. He's my nephew.

72. And I would just appreciate it if you would

73. try to understand him.

74. Hi, mom. Hi, dad.

75. - Hi, sweetie pie. Hi. - Hi, Ashley.

76. Yo, this place is huge, man.

77. Next time, I go to my room, I'mma take some bread crumbs.

78. Will, this is Ashley.

79. Hey, hi, my little Scottish cousin.

80. Pleased to make your acquaintance.

81. I'm your humble servant.

82. - He's cute. - I know he is.

83. Well, I'm going to take a swim before dinner.

84. Good luck, mom. The pool heater's broken.

85. Don't you just hate it when that happens?

86. Oh, yes. That is my pet peeve.

87. - You got your own pool in here? - Uh-hmm.

88. And a tennis court too.

89. Yo, this is better than "Love Boat."

90. This boy going to be maxing and relaxing.

91. No, no, no. Hold on. Just a minute, son. No, no, no.

92. We promised your mother that you're here to work hard

93. straighten out, and learn some good old-fashioned

94. American values.

95. Dad, I need $300.

96. Hilary, your cousin Will is here.

97. Hi. Dad, I need $300.

98. That's a lot of money, Hilary. What for?

99. I need a new hat.

100. - For what? - Probably her head.

101. Okay, like, I'm going on the Save The Ozone Celebrity Bus

102. next Saturday, it's gonna be Bruce Willis and Demi

103. Rob Lowe, Emilio Estevez

104. or Charlie Sheen. I can't remember which.

105. We're gonna take the bus all over town

106. to protest air pollution

107. and then we're gonna motor to the beach

108. and have a big bonfire.

109. What?

110. I'm not an expert or anything, but don't you think

111. driving a big ol' bus around town, and then having a bonfire

112. sorta adding to the problem of pollution?

113. What do you think, huh?

114. Look, if this weren't a good idea

115. I really, really don't think Ally Sheedy would be involved.

116. Hey, look who's here, Benson.

117. This is for you.

118. Oh, but I didn't get you anything.

119. Your uncle has invited several of the partners

120. from his law firm to dinner.

121. At the time of the invitation

122. he did not realize you'd be descending upon him today.

123. And regrettably, it was too late to cancel.

124. Yo, are we having a party?

125. Oh, so we're going to get stupid, right?

126. For some of us, that will require

127. very little effort indeed.

128. Miss Ashley.

129. That will be all, Geoffrey.

130. That's all you got to say to get rid of him?

131. I've been racking my brain.

132. Uh, this is for you.

133. Oh, thank you, Ashley.

134. Oh, this is nice. You're very talented.

135. Well, I'm glad I'm good at something.

136. Huh?

137. I tried out for school chorus today

138. but I didn't get in.

139. How come?

140. Well, when I auditioned for Mrs. Burkley

141. I couldn't remember all the words to the song.

142. The part I remembered was fantastic.

143. I'm sure it was. I bet you're def.

144. That's what she said.

145. No, not-not deaf deaf. D-E-F.

146. It's, that's just slang.

147. Means terrific, good, you know.

148. Oh, well, thank you.

149. You should try being a rapper.

150. When you're rapping you mess up the words

151. and make up some new ones right there on the spot.

152. So let's-let's try this, I'll sing one line

153. and you make up a line to rhyme it.

154. - Okay. - Alright. Let's see. Alright.

155. I'm thinking, alright?

156. Alright. We got all day.

157. - Okay, I got it. - Alright, here we go.

158. Yeah, yeah.

159. Ashley, honey, why don't you go downstairs

160. and get ready for dinner.

161. - Okay, daddy. Bye, Will. - Check you later, Ash.

162. Look who's here, Will.

163. Hey!

164. Who is he?

165. It's your cousin Carlton. Don't you remember?

166. When you two were little, people used to think you were twins.

167. You looked exactly alike.

168. Oh. Well, I guess some things never change, huh?

169. - How's it going there, Will? - Yeah, it's going alright, man.

170. Ahh. Malcolm X.

171. Yeah, he's sort of my hero.

172. Well, he was a great man.

173. I don't know if I'd call him my hero exactly.

174. Oh, really? Who are your heroes?

175. Well, my dad.

176. And Bryant Gumbel. He's darn good.

177. Oh, my, yes!

178. I see they brought your tuxedo.

179. Tell me something, Will.

180. Have you ever attended a formal dinner before?

181. Well, you know, other than that thing

182. at Buckingham Palace, no.

183. Hmm. Yeah, okay.

184. The important thing to remember is to just relax

185. enjoy yourself, and when in doubt

186. do whatever Carlton's doing.

187. You got it, man.

188. Okay, then I'll see you at dinner.

189. That's a really neat tux, isn't it, Will?

190. Oh, yes. It's definitely the cat's meow.

191. Wait till we come downstairs in those tuxes.

192. People may not think we're twins

193. but I bet they'll think we're brothers.

194. You know, I don't think you have to worry about

195. anybody mistaking you for a brother.

196. Touche.

197. This is going to be great. Your first formal dinner.

198. And tomorrow, I'll introduce you to the gang.

199. Maybe we'll play a set of tennis or two.

200. Oh, yes. This is going to be wild.

201. Aah!

202. - Where is he? - He's upstairs changing.

203. Not Will. President Reagan.

204. - You didn't? - What do you mean I didn't?

205. - You invited him again. - Why not? He's our neighbor.

206. Philip, he's turned down the last 16 invitations.

207. When are you gonna take a hint?

208. Maybe I should call his house.

209. Philip, don't, I don't want him here.

210. - Why not? - Because he'll bring her.

211. Anyway, Bruce and Demi and I all feel

212. that the ozone layer must be protected.

213. I mean, every square foot of rain forest that's cut down

214. brings us just one step closer to global warming.

215. We have to learn to protect the earth

216. not just for ourselves and not just for our children

217. but for the future of all mankind.

218. Oh, I had no idea it was such a serious problem.

219. I-I really commend you for getting involved

220. in such a good cause.

221. Thanks. It's my passion.

222. Where can I send a donation?

223. I don't know.

224. Oh, my God!

225. Philip, Philip, don't make a big thing out of it.

226. If this is how he feels comfortable.

227. It's not killing anybody.

228. Philip, aren't you going to introduce Will?

229. Introduce him.

230. Well, Steve, David, Henry

231. this is Will, my nephew by marriage.

232. Will, these are my partners

233. in the law firm of Furth, Wynn, and Meyer.

234. Hey, Earth, Wind, and Fire!

235. When's your next album coming out?

236. Uh, Will is going to go to Bel-Air academy with Carlton.

237. Oh! Good for you, Will.

238. I used to fence at Bel-Air.

239. Really? How much you think we can get for that stereo?

240. Oh, these, these hors d'oeuvres look tempting.

241. Hey, don't mind if I do.

242. How could you do that?

243. It's all in the tongue. Show you later.

244. Will! There are other people at this table.

245. Oh. You're right.

246. Any requests?

247. Sweetie, would you say grace, please?

248. Yes, mommy. Ahem!

249. Hey, Geoffrey, home butler!

250. I'm glad to see you, man.

251. It is a special thrill for me as well.

252. Yo, check this out, I'm gon' be down here for a little while.

253. Why don't you hop on in the kitchen and get me some cocoa?

254. Master William, while it is my natural inclination

255. to accede to your every demand

256. I officially go off duty at 9:00 p.m.

257. And if you care to look at your watch

258. you will note the long hand is on 12

259. and the short hand is on nine.

260. It is 9 o'clock, Master William.

261. And do you know what that means?

262. "Masterpiece Theatre" is on.

263. Sir, do you require anything further of me?

264. - No, Geoffrey. - Then I shall retire.

265. Man, he took that hard.

266. - I want to talk to you. - About what?

267. You know, from the minute you walked in that door

268. you've been a one-man wrecking crew trying to tear down

269. what's taken a lot of hard work to build up

270. skewering everything with your flippant shenanigans!

271. Hey, man, I-I was with you up till skewering.

272. You know what I'm talking about.

273. You deliberately tried to embarrass me tonight

274. and I don't get it, your aunt and I went through

275. a lot of trouble to bring you out here.

276. And this is the thanks we get?

277. Man, I ain't asked to come here.

278. Everybody's talking about shipping me off

279. and dressing me up, and changing me

280. into something that I don't want to be.

281. Nobody wants to change you.

282. You told me yourself I got to straighten out

283. and "When in doubt, act as Carlton acts."

284. Man, I don't wanna be like Carlton.

285. I-I mean, I'm a joker. I play around. I have fun.

286. Umm-hmm, being a joker is what's gotten you into trouble.

287. You may think it's cool to be on the streets when you're 17

288. but when you're my age, it's a waste.

289. Yo, I can't think that far ahead.

290. That's your problem.

291. You can't take anything seriously.

292. Look, man, I don't have the problem, alright

293. you have the problem.

294. Alright, I remind you of where you came from

295. and what you used to be, now I don't know somewhere between

296. Princeton or the office, you got soft.

297. You forgot who you are and where you came from.

298. You think you're so wise.

299. Look at me when I'm talking to you.

300. Let me tell you something, son.

301. I grew up on the streets just like you.

302. I encountered bigotry you could not imagine.

303. Now, you have a nice poster of Malcolm X on your wall.

304. I heard the brother speak.

305. I read every word he wrote.

306. Believe me. I know where I come from.

307. You actually heard Malcolm speak, man?

308. That's right, so before you criticize somebody

309. you find out what he's all about.

310. I'll take care of you in the morning. I'm going to bed.

311. Oh, hold up, I can't tell my side of the story?

312. No, you can't tell your side of the story.

313. I know what you're all about.

314. Believe me, the very thought of it

315. makes me very, very tired.

316. Goodnight.

317. 'Ash?'

318. Ash.

319. Will!

320. Ladies and gentlemen,

321. my fly girl, Ashley Banks.

322. Would you teach me how to dance?

323. Well, yeah. Not in here.

324. Even I'll lose my rhythm in this room.

325. Okay.

326. Hey, so, um, could you do me a favor?

327. Sure.

328. I seem to be missing a walkman, you know

329. so if it like shows up anywhere

330. like, I don't know, on your head

331. maybe just, you know

332. maybe you could get that to me.

333. Sorry. Dad won't let me get one.

334. How come?

335. He says he wants to hear everything

336. I'm listening to, you know, to make sure it's not bad.

337. Well, what record does he think's good?

338. He really, really likes "The Care Bears."

339. Oh.

340. Look, Ash, from time to time

341. your father's going to say or do things

342. that may seem irrational or hard for you to understand.

343. You know, it's not because he's mean or a bad guy

344. or it's not that he doesn't care about you.

345. It's that he's from Mars, Ashley.

346. - I got to get washed up. - Me, too.

347. I'm really glad you're living here, Will.

348. Oh, thanks, Ash.

349. You're like the big brother I never had.

350. Oh, what, what are you talking about? You got Carl..

351. You're right. I see your point.

352. How many bathrooms you got in this place?

353. Four and a half.

354. A half bath? Now, how does that work?

355. It doesn't have everything a full bathroom has.

356. Oh, well, I think you better show me a full bathroom.

357. I don't want to take no chances.

358. Next bathroom.

359. 'Can't a person gargle in peace?'

360. Uh, Hilary, are you gonna be in there for long

361. or is this just like a pit stop?

362. 'Stop hounding me.'

363. 'I'm trying to take off my makeup.'

364. 'Now go away.'

365. Okay, goodnight, Hilary. Shh!

366. I knew it!