The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air 4x9

Directed by Shelley Jensen

Samantha Dorman as Playmate #4 • Cady Cantrell as Playmate #3 • Tyra Banks as Jackie Ames • DJ Jazzy Jeff as Jazz • Tawnni Cable as Playmate #1

Will breaks a date with Jackie to accompany Hilary to a Playboy Mansion reception for weather reporters being photographed for the magazine.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. Family, I have an announcement.

2. Listen, playboy's doing a pictorial

3. on the prettiest weather girls

4. from coast to coast.

5. They're going to call it...

6. "Warm fronts."

7. And they want me to be in it.

8. Absolutely not.

9. But, daddy, don't you even want to hear what I have to say?

10. You heard our father! No!

11. Carlton, what do you care?

12. Look, I will not be publicly embarrassed

13. by a potential scandal.

14. Now, now, don't get your underoos

15. in a knot, stumpy.

16. Hilary knows what she's doing.

17. Wait a minute. I haven't even decided—

18. whoa, quiet, hilary. Work with me here, hil.

19. I can see it now—

20. long afternoons kicking back on a chaise lounge

21. watching full-body contact volleyball

22. up at hef's place.

23. Hilary, as long as you live in my house,

24. you will abide by my rules,

25. and that goes for the rest of you.

26. That's telling us, dad.

27. Wait. I am 24 years old,

28. and I can make my own decisions.

29. Besides, mom said it was ok.

30. Oh, yeah?

31. Vivian!

32. So you said your daughter

33. could pose in playboyhuh?

34. No. I said I didn't like the idea,

35. but I also said she's a grown woman, and it's her choice.

36. No daughter of mine

37. is posing in that kind of magazine, period.

38. You do this to me all the time, daddy.

39. I have a mind of my own and opinions,

40. and you never let me express them and...

41. What were we talking about?

42. Um...

43. Hil, I think you were in the process

44. of storming out of here.

45. Thanks, will.

46. so what do you think?

47. Look like you got hatjacked by Woody woodpecker.

48. These are the new booster hats.

49. Help me set up a display.

50. Sure thing, boss lady.

51. Oh, Jackie, check it out.

52. Hypothetical situation.

53. Let's just say, like, a famous men's magazine

54. asked you to pose

55. with nothing but that stupid hat on.

56. Would you do it?

57. No way.

58. I don't want just anybody

59. looking at this body.

60. Has it changed since we used to play doctor?

61. Stop. See? You're laughing.

62. Teeth. I didn't even know you had those.

63. That was fun? Imagine how much more fun it would be

64. if we was both naked.

65. Will, you just hit on me from force of habit.

66. Now, if you really want to go out with me,

67. why not step to me like a man?

68. Well, ok.

69. Ahem.

70. So, jacqueline...

71. I was wondering if you'd do me the honor

72. of having dinner with me.

73. Ok.

74. "Ok"?

75. "Ok" is alright if I offered you

76. a government cheese sandwich,

77. but I'm offering you...

78. A buffet of love, child.

79. Take it easy, homey.

80. I mean, you asked like a gentleman.

81. If you can just keep acting like a gentleman,

82. maybe we can get somewhere.

83. Somewhere that we could talk

84. lying down? Will.

85. Alright, Jackie. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

86. Temporary dude breakdown.

87. I'm back now.

88. Um, look, so when is good for you?

89. I don't know. I was thinking

90. about this afternoon leading into the evening.

91. Mmm. You know what the evening leads—

92. I'm sorry. I need to have that treated.

93. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

94. I'll call you later.

95. Come without the stupid hat, ok?

96. Mmm.

97. Hey, girl, I was— would you stop it?

98. Stop, stop, stop.

99. Hilary...

100. Are you really going to pose in that magazine?

101. Why? Does it bother you?

102. A little.

103. I don't even like to get undressed in gym class.

104. Ashley, your body

105. is going through some changes,

106. and they may seem...

107. Awkward and embarrassing.

108. But I promise you.

109. It's completely normal,

110. and the discomfort— it's only temporary.

111. I know. I look great naked.

112. It's just that I just don't like

113. a bunch of gooney people staring at me.

114. Oh, you get used to it.

115. I guess I could kiss heaven good-bye

116. 'cause it got to be a sin to look this good.

117. Tss.

118. Caliente!

119. Ow!

120. You've been playing tennis

121. with the gardener again, haven't you?

122. Adios.

123. You do look great, will.

124. Thanks a lot. You can help me out.

125. I need a smoking place

126. to take a date. Oh, sure.

127. We'll talk about it on the way.

128. I'm gonna go get dressed.

129. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What party?

130. Well, isn't that why you're all dressed up?

131. Oh, did I forget to tell you?

132. I think you're still in the process of forgetting.

133. Playboy called.

134. They're having a pool party at the mansion

135. to kick off the weather girl shoot.

136. And?

137. And since you stood up for me with daddy,

138. I'm taking you.

139. Yes! I knew that! Oh! Oh, baby...

140. Hey, let me tell you,

141. you are the best cousin a brother ever had.

142. I'm going to the playboy mansion.

143. Oh...

144. Oh, hello, hef.

145. Oh, pshaw.

146. Don't be silly. I'm glad I could come.

147. Oh, miss December,

148. oh, baby, I was going to call you.

149. Come here, girl. Mm.

150. Excuse me, master William.

151. If you can tear yourself away

152. from your imaginary friends...

153. Ahem.

154. A miss jacqueline's on the phone.

155. Ooh, ooh, I forgot all about Jackie.

156. Look, g., g., um, look,

157. if you had to decide between going on a date

158. with a girl that you care

159. and going to the playboy mansion,

160. which would it be?

161. The fact that you're even asking, master William,

162. tells me that you really care about the lady.

163. Well, I guess I do.

164. Admirable.

165. Tell me,

166. might this young lady have a terminal illness?

167. No, g. Of course not.

168. Then may I point out

169. she'll still be here tomorrow?

170. Ha! Ha ha!

171. Oh, I'm sorry, babe. I'm sick.

172. No, no, no.

173. Don't come over because, you know, I could be catching.

174. Well, you know,

175. I'll just have to talk to you tomorrow.

176. Bye.

177. So, when do we leave for the mansion?

178. Oh, they don't need you, g. They're fully staffed.

179. Ooh, either that is one tight dress

180. or a really good paint job.

181. Come on. Let's go.

182. Wait a minute, will.

183. I think I'm having second thoughts.

184. What do you mean?

185. I don't know if doing the layout

186. is worth having daddy hate me.

187. No, no, no. It's only the rest of his life.

188. I'm saying, after them pictures come out,

189. how much longer could he have?

190. Will... I'm joking.

191. I'm joking. I'm joking.

192. I thought you wanted to do.

193. Well, I do.

194. You can't just let your pop

195. be pushing all the time.

196. It'd be so much easier

197. if only he liked playboy.

198. Liked it?

199. He's got issues in his bathroom

200. from, like, 1964.

201. Come on. Just don't worry about it.

202. Let's just go to the party.

203. Freeze!

204. Oh, look, the little republican store must've opened.

205. Good joke, will.

206. I'll laugh on the way to the party.

207. Whoa, teeny.

208. What makes you think

209. you're going to the party with us?

210. I'm not going to miss out on Princeton

211. because she wants to expose her weather balloons

212. Carlton,

213. I think Geoffrey's baking cookies.

214. Oh!

215. Oh, no, you don't.

216. Look, I'm going to talk to Mr. Hefner

217. and put a stop to this.

218. My voice will be heard.

219. You must take me with you.

220. Sure.

221. How can you let him come with us?

222. Trust me, hil.

223. He ain't going to say nothing.

224. Well, how can you be so sure?

225. He gets all hot and bothered

226. talking to average-looking girls.

227. 5 minutes at the mansion,

228. he's going to go into meltdown.

229. Ooh, I can't believe it.

230. Yo, it's just like the magazine,

231. except the girls ain't got folds

232. in the middle and jokes on they backs.

233. Carlton, stand up.

234. You're drooling on my pumps.

235. Come on, you guys.

236. Oh, my legs are like rubber.

237. Yeah, and your head is like a peanut.

238. Carlton, what was it

239. you wanted to say to Mr. Hefner?

240. I want to tell him, I love this place.

241. Look at that swimming pool.

242. Mmm... I have never seen

243. so many people in one place I wanted

244. to give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to.

245. Breathing ok?

246. Hey, Hugh!

247. Why are you shouting? I'm right next to you.

248. Not "you." "Hugh."

249. You who?

250. Stop yodeling. Hugh Hefner.

251. Excuse me?

252. Hey, Mr. Hefner.

253. What an honor. I'm will Smith.

254. This is my cousin hilary.

255. Oh, a pleasure. Hilary banks.

256. I'm glad you could make it.

257. Let me show you around.

258. Oh, I'd be honored.

259. Relax, guys. Have some fun.

260. There are suits in the bathhouse.

261. Yeah. You def, hef.

262. Will, why didn't you introduce me?

263. Carlton, I got to be honest, man.

264. I forgot you was even here.

265. Oh, that's just great.

266. Hey, will, isn't that jazz?

267. Jazz, what are you doing here?

268. Shh... I'm on the list.

269. They think I'm the black dude from mod squad.

270. Would you like to have dinner

271. with the children, sir?

272. Yes. That would be nice, Geoffrey.

273. Too bad. They're not here.

274. Then why'd you bring it up?

275. If you don't care where your children are,

276. sir, neither do I.

277. Ok...

278. Where are they?

279. Sir, I could never betray their confidence.

280. They're at the playboy mansion,

281. all except young Ashley.

282. She's upstairs with her boyfriend.

283. Aah!

284. That one's on the house.

285. Vivian!

286. Vivian! Vivian!

287. Oh, Philip, did you call me?

288. Do you know where your children are?

289. Sure. They're at the playboy mansion.

290. How come you knew that and I didn't?

291. Because they talk to me.

292. Why don't they talk to me?

293. Because you don't listen.

294. D'oh!

295. What's up, baby?

296. What you doing after the party?

297. Actually, I'll be in surgery.

298. Mmm... Looks like everything

299. on that body's in working order.

300. I'll be performing surgery.

301. I'm a doctor.

302. Ooh. Doc, you can check me out anytime.

303. Trust me.

304. I'm a cardiologist. You need a pediatrician.

305. Miss march, right?

306. I didn't recognize you with your clothes on.

307. Don't tell me. Don't tell me.

308. Turn-ons—fast cars, shrimp bouillabaisse,

309. and, uh, Indian quilts, right?

310. Very impressive.

311. Now do you remember my turn-offs?

312. Do I?

313. Hairy backs, smokers, and abrasive young men

314. who don't know when to shut up, right?

315. Bingo.

316. Girl, what would it take for a guy like me

317. to get next to a girl like you?

318. 5 years and 6 figures.

319. Thank you very much.

320. So tell me about yourself.

321. I have a boyfriend who plays on the Lakers.

322. I suppose your boyfriend's

323. a tackle for the rams, huh?

324. No, the raiders.

325. Get away from me.

326. Hey, will.

327. Hey, this place is great.

328. I've already got two numbers,

329. if I play my cards right, she'll give me the other 5.

330. Carlton, I don't think

331. I'm going to hang around to find out.

332. It's like being up here

333. helped me realize how important Jackie...

334. Bunny hop!

335. Really is to me!

336. ow!

337. What do you think you're doing?

338. The bunny hop.

339. Where's your sister?

340. She went to Malibu with the other weather girls

341. to have their pictures taken.

342. Go wait in the car, Carlton.

343. I was going to go talk to Mr. Hefner about hilary.

344. Go get in the car, Carlton.

345. I really want to thank you

346. for taking the time to talk with me.

347. Well, it's always a pleasure

348. to talk to a longtime subscriber.

349. My man Linc.

350. Uh...

351. I want to cut right to the chase here.

352. It's about my daughter posing for your magazine.

353. I mean...

354. Well, how would you feel if your daughter

355. got involved in this whole world?

356. Well, my daughter

357. is involved in this whole world.

358. She runs the playboy empire.

359. Ok.

360. Let's try this a different way.

361. Well, look.

362. Suppose somebody that you really care about,

363. like your wife,

364. suppose she decided to pose.

365. Well, my wife was the playmate of the year,

366. and I'm very proud of her.

367. Don't you understand?

368. There are some parents who are just not comfortable

369. with their daughters being stared at

370. by millions of people.

371. I understand where you're coming from.

372. Look, over the years,

373. I've had to deal with a lot of parents.

374. You seem like a good man.

375. Let me put it this way.

376. I promise you

377. the pictures will be tasteful.

378. Tasteful? Oh, yeah, right.

379. Ha ha ha! I know what that means.

380. Ha! Thank you very much.

381. Jackie, you're here.

382. Will, I thought you were sick.

383. Oh, yeah, I was.

384. You know, at least I thought I was.

385. You know, actually, I had an allergic reaction

386. to—to—to... To bunnies.

387. So, say, what's up with that date?

388. I'm sorry, will, but when you canceled on me,

389. I made plans to go to the movies.

390. Oh, that's cool.

391. Call up your little girlfriend

392. and break them.

393. My little girlfriend is 6'2" with a mustache.

394. What kind of monster are you?

395. A man is laying up in his deathbed,

396. and you go stepping out on him?

397. Hey, will, you and me ain't all that.

398. Ok, ok, ok.

399. What are you doing after the movies?

400. I think that's between me and Tony.

401. Ok. How about tomorrow night?

402. I got basketball practice.

403. That's cool. I'll come watch.

404. You can't. You're working tomorrow.

405. Mike called in sick.

406. He probably has what you thought you did.

407. Ok. Next Saturday night?

408. Bachelorette party.

409. Christmas!

410. I'm going home.

411. New year's Eve!

412. Groundhog day!

413. Cinco de Mayo?

414. Rosh hashanah, huh?

415. Well, I hope you're proud of yourself, Vivian.

416. What'd I do?

417. Your daughter is somewhere in Malibu

418. stark naked.

419. What are you talking about?

420. She went and posed for playboy,

421. and you encouraged her.

422. I did no such thing.

423. When I talked to her, she hadn't made up her mind yet.

424. If anything pushed her over the edge,

425. it was your usual "do it my way or else" charm.

426. Don't you start with me, Vivian.

427. No matter what I did, she's my daughter,

428. and a daughter should obey her father.

429. In that case, I never would've married you.

430. Oh, that was different.

431. Your father had it in for me.

432. What was it again he didn't like about me?

433. It was a tie between your family and your temper.

434. I'll tell you one thing. I sure don't miss him...

435. God rest his soul.

436. Sweetheart, listen.

437. Sometimes a parent has to step back

438. and let their child find their own way.

439. I'll be upstairs.

440. Hi, dad.

441. Hi.

442. Listen, daddy, I'm sorry,

443. I've already had my pictures taken.

444. It's alright.

445. It was my choice, and—

446. it's alright?

447. You're not a child anymore.

448. You're a beautiful woman,

449. beautiful enough for playboy to ask

450. and woman enough to make your own decisions.

451. No matter what, I still love you.

452. Oh, daddy.

453. So when are your pictures coming out?

454. They said in about two months.

455. You understand, of course,

456. I can't be here when they do.

457. Enter.

458. It's arrived, Uncle Phil.

459. I don't want to see it.

460. It came in the mail today

461. with a personal letter from Mr. Hefner.

462. Thinks you should take a look at it.

463. So do I.

464. You can forget it, because I'm—

465. oh... Alright.

466. Hey, look at that.

467. She's covered up.

468. Hallelujah! She's covered up!

469. But this little girl is not.

470. Ooh... Ooh...

471. Hallelujah. Hallelujah.

472. You heard our father! No!

473. Carlton, what do you care?

474. Look. I will not be publicly embarrassed

475. by a—a— problem...

476. Of me remembering my damn lines!

477. It won't happen, damn it.

478. It ain't gonna happen!

479. It's ok. It's ok.

480. I am not going to allow it!

481. Alright? It's over!

482. It's alright, man!

483. It's alright, man!

484. Let it go, man!

485. Let it go!

486. It's over! It's ok, man!