1. Daddy, can we take
Nicky with us
to graduation?
Copy !req
2. No, I don't think so,
sweetheart.
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3. But maybe Geoffrey
can baby-sit for him.
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4. Of course, sir.
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5. And no, I wouldn't mind
missing the ceremony.
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6. Why should I
be invited to such
an illustrious event
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7. after a mere 15 years
of wiping, picking,
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8. and sucking up
after you all?
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9. Geoffrey, we would love
for you to come to
graduation with us.
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10. I'll have to
check my book.
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11. Geoffrey, you're coming.
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12. But, you know,
your mother's
not feeling well,
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13. I don't feel
right leaving him
with a stranger.
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14. I can take care of him.
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15. But who's
going to take
care of you?
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16. Yeah, come on,
hilary. Plus,
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17. you can't miss
the ceremony,
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18. hard as I worked
to graduate.
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19. Man, you know how
hard it is to take
a test like this?
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20. Guess what?
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21. I'm the class
valedictorian!
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22. Oh!
Oh!
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23. What does that mean?
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24. I believe it's Latin
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25. for "little short midget
with a square head."
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26. Now...
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27. What was Antonio Vivaldi
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28. trying to tell us
in this concerto?
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29. Come on, baby.
I'm saying
bing-bang-bloozy,
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30. me and you in the
jacuzzi. Wassup?
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31. Mr. Smith?
The concerto?
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32. What was Vivaldi saying?
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33. Well, actually,
Mrs. bassin,
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34. I'm glad you
asked me that.
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35. Ahem.
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36. Vivaldi, or vivildee,
as it is pronounced
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37. in some
European circles...
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38. I believe
he was commenting
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39. on man's inhumanity
toward man.
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40. That...
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41. We...
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42. Citizens of America,
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43. the richest country
on this planet,
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44. have a moral obligation
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45. that goes far beyond
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46. buying the newest car...
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47. Or purchasing
the latest naughty
by nature cd.
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48. If one child
goes hungry...
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49. We must feed it.
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50. If one child shivers...
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51. We must shelter it.
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52. And I, for one...
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53. Believe the brother knew
what he was talking about.
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54. Vivaldi died in 1741,
before there was
a United States.
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55. But the dream is alive.
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56. More on Vivaldi
tomorrow.
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57. What's up?
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58. Mr. Smith, may I have
a word with you?
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59. Yeah, I was gonna—
Mr. Smith?
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60. Hey,
Mrs. bassin,
I'm sorry.
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61. I-I-I was acting
silly today.
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62. I'll make it up
tomorrow.
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63. Too little, too late.
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64. Will, I'm going
to have to fail you.
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65. Whoa! Hey!
Whoa! Ooh!
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66. The "f" word,
why? Why?
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67. You missed
half the semester.
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68. What's your point?
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69. Will, you have
10 classes to make up
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70. and only 5
before graduation.
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71. W—listen...
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72. Listen, Mrs. bassin,
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73. I tell you,
I'll make up.
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74. Come on,
I have to graduate!
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75. I'm sorry, but
you have no one
to blame but yourself.
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76. H-hold...
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77. Listen, Mrs. bassin,
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78. I don't think
you understand.
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79. My mom is flying out
from Philly to see me graduate,
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80. I mean, the woman
that gave me life.
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81. And if I don't graduate,
she'll take it back!
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82. Listen, I'll
make up the work.
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83. You don't have time.
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84. Besides, there's no way
you could keep up
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85. with my accelerated class.
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86. It's over.
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87. Mrs. bassin.
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88. Mrs. bassin, listen,
listen. Come on.
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89. Come on. This is me.
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90. I'm saying, please give me
another chance. Please?
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91. Come on?
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92. Alright. Be here
tomorrow at 5:00.
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93. Yes!
But no promises.
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94. Hey, thanks a lot,
Mrs. bassin.
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95. Wait. Batman is at 5:00.
Can we make it at 6:30?
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96. I'm joking.
I'm stupid, stupid.
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97. I know.
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98. So, jeanine, when
did you first decide
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99. you wanted to take
care of children?
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100. When I was so instructed
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101. by the lord
of the eighth circle.
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102. So, Lindsay, when
did you first decide
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103. you wanted to take
care of children?
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104. I guess...
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105. Shortly after my release.
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106. Oh, please!
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107. What do you know
about taking care
of babies?
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108. Babies? I'm here
to take care of hilary!
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109. Aah!
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110. Did my mom
get here yet?
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111. Geoffrey's picking her up
from the airport.
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112. So, will,
I've been meaning
to ask you—
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113. what do you want
for graduation?
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114. Would y'all stop
with the interrogation,
please?
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115. Obviously,
some of us
can handle
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116. the pressures
of graduation
better than others.
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117. Pressure? Look, man,
I'm not feeling
no pressure, ok?
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118. Thank God you're
not giving the speech.
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119. It's an immense
responsibility—
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120. one I face
with great humility,
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121. but do I shirk it? No.
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122. Because somehow,
deep down,
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123. I know anyone else
would really bite.
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124. Gosh, Carlton,
you're so confident.
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125. I'd be too nervous
to be valedictorian.
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126. Nervous?
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127. Why?
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128. Why? I mean, to have
all those people
staring at you?
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129. I mean, people stare
at me all the time,
but I'm pretty.
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130. I guess
that spandex shirt
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131. don't got nothing
to do with it, huh?
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132. Aren't you afraid
you're going
to mess up?
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133. Not a problem.
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134. Well, I'd be worried.
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135. Yeah, every kid
hoping you make
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136. a fool
of yourself...
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137. Every parent
wondering what
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138. you're doing up
at the podium
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139. and why
you're sweating
so much? Eww!
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140. Come on, man.
You ain't got to worry
about none of that.
Copy !req
141. But I'd worry
about slipping off
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142. them stack of phone books
you're gonna be standing on.
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143. Heck, you guys!
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144. Heck!
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145. You're very,
very brave.
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146. We're so proud of you!
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147. Oh, God.
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148. I'm short,
I'm sweaty,
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149. and I can't grow
chest hair!
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150. Oh, my goodness.
Is that a bald spot?
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151. Aah!
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152. Oh, there he is—
my graduate!
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153. Hey, ma.
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154. Ohhh!
Ohhh!
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155. You're
my pride and joy,
sweetie!
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156. This means
everything to me.
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157. I never thought
I'd live to see
this day,
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158. but here I am,
and there you are.
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159. Now smile
and say "diploma."
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160. Look, mom, mom—
Copy !req
161. this is just
a little graduation.
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162. I think
you're making
too much of it.
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163. Boy,
are you crazy?
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164. I've been waiting
18 years
for this moment.
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165. Come on, mom.
You must've done
Copy !req
166. something else
in all that time.
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167. Nothing more important
than this.
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168. Apparently,
you've never danced
the achy-breaky.
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169. Will, completing
high school is
a great achievement.
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170. You've made me
so happy,
I could cry.
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171. Yeah, me, too.
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172. Mmm.
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173. Will. Where have you been?
I haven't seen you
in music class.
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174. Oh, you ain't hear?
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175. Oh, Ms. bassin
bumped me up to
her advanced class.
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176. You know, will,
you are so talented.
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177. Yeah, and I'm
pretty good at music,
too, you know?
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178. Oh, silly.
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179. Get out of here
before I do something.
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180. Will, you made it!
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181. Class, say hello
to will.
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182. He'll be joining us
until the end
of the semester.
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183. Great. Another
high-school dropout.
Copy !req
184. Ok. Now, before
we start our scales,
Copy !req
185. can anyone tell me
what pizzicato means?
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186. Mr. Smith?
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187. Mr. Smith?
You got all these...
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188. Um... Ahem.
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189. Sure, um...
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190. Pizzicato.
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191. That's a...
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192. Pizza
with avocado.
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193. Ha ha ha ha!
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194. Ha ha! Get it?
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195. I said it was a,
a pizza with, uh...
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196. Michael.
Copy !req
197. Pizzicato—
a term indicating
Copy !req
198. that strings should
be plucked,
Copy !req
199. not bowed.
Copy !req
200. Oh, yeah? Well, there
ain't no Santa claus!
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201. Another slice for you,
master William?
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202. Nah, no, thanks, g.
I'm not hungry.
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203. That's funny.
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204. Will always
has seconds at home.
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205. G...
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206. I am this close to
not graduating, man.
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207. My music teacher's
got it out for me.
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208. She's forcing me
to make up 10 hours.
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209. Come on, it ain't like
I got a future in music
or nothing.
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210. Well, I sincerely hope
you graduate.
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211. Thanks.
That means a lot.
Copy !req
212. 'Cause if
you're left back
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213. I've to wash
your gym socks
for another year,
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214. I shall take
my own life!
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215. Surprise!
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216. Look, mom,
what is this?
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217. Your 4-days-before-
graduation gift.
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218. Look, mom,
this has got to stop.
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219. There wouldn't happen
to be no car keys,
would there?
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220. No.
Copy !req
221. Then this has got
to stop, mom!
Copy !req
222. I know. I'm getting
a carried away,
Copy !req
223. but I'm just
so proud of you!
Copy !req
224. Your graduation is
very important to me.
Copy !req
225. Mom, it wouldn't be
if you got out more.
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226. I know what's
going on here.
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227. You do?
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228. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
229. You're trying
to downplay
graduation
Copy !req
230. because you don't
want me to feel bad
Copy !req
231. that I never got
a chance to graduate.
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232. Oh, God,
my life is over.
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233. I wish I'd never been
made valedictorian!
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234. Oh, Carlton,
come on.
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235. You're going
to do fine.
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236. When you're
up there,
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237. just picture someone
that you really admire
Copy !req
238. watching you with
love and approval.
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239. Go on, try it.
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240. Oh, it's no good.
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241. The only thing
I can picture
Copy !req
242. is someone laughing
and pointing at me.
Copy !req
243. Ok, Carlton, now.
You stop that, man.
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244. That is not going to happen to
you when you give that speech.
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245. That's going to
happen to you on
your wedding night.
Copy !req
246. Ok, kids.
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247. Today we're going
to choose up teams
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248. and play musical
jeopardy!
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249. Now, who wants to be
our 2 captains?
Copy !req
250. Right here.
Right here.
Mrs. bassin.
Copy !req
251. Nancy and Michael.
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252. Mrs.
2 players left.
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253. Make your choice.
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254. Um...
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255. Come on!
You got to pick me!
Copy !req
256. Alright!
Stop your whining.
Copy !req
257. Now for the final
question.
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258. The answer is...
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259. A clef.
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260. Oh!
I know! I know!
I know! Um...
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261. Um, um,
what is that thing
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262. Michael Jackson had
built into his chin?
Copy !req
263. Nancy.
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264. What is the character
that indicates the pitch
Copy !req
265. of a particular line
on a staff?
Copy !req
266. That's right!
Congratulations!
Your team wins.
Copy !req
267. Good job.
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268. What are you
looking at?
Copy !req
269. Tch. Not much.
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270. Look, we could take this
out to the monkey bars!
Copy !req
271. Anytime, anyplace!
Copy !req
272. I'm just kidding.
You the man.
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273. Ok, students,
don't forget to get here
early tomorrow
Copy !req
274. so you can be measured
for your costumes
for the recital.
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275. Recital?
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276. That's right.
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277. Uh, Mrs. bassin...
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278. Uh, my sister,
listen...
Copy !req
279. I appreciate
everything you're
doing for me,
Copy !req
280. but—look,
I am not about
to embarrass myself
Copy !req
281. in front of a group
of strangers.
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282. Mr. Smith,
my brother,
Copy !req
283. you're not going
to embarrass yourself
Copy !req
284. in front of a group
of strangers.
Copy !req
285. Oh, that's
what I said.
Copy !req
286. You'll be performing
for your friends
at graduation.
Copy !req
287. What—wait,
are you tripping?
No way!
Copy !req
288. Then you won't be
able to graduate,
I'm afraid.
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289. Then I'm afraid
I'm not going to be able
Copy !req
290. to sign your yearbook!
Copy !req
291. Look, alright?
I know the two of you
Copy !req
292. are upset about me
not graduating, ok?
Copy !req
293. But you'll get over it.
You'll have to.
Copy !req
294. Alright? 'Cause
I made up my mind,
Copy !req
295. and nothing either
of you can say
is going to change that.
Copy !req
296. Ok? 'Cause I'm a man—
Copy !req
297. alright—with
strong man emotions.
Copy !req
298. And there is no way
that this man
Copy !req
299. is going to get up
on that stage and embarrass
himself at graduation.
Copy !req
300. No, no, no.
Copy !req
301. Good luck, sweetie.
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302. I'm so proud of you.
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303. Mama's boy.
Copy !req
304. Ok, kids, I'm going
to announce you,
Copy !req
305. so take your marks.
Copy !req
306. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Hey, hey, hey!
Copy !req
307. Where are
you guys going?
Copy !req
308. Don't you guys want
to go out there
Copy !req
309. and see Uncle Willie make
a fool of hisself?
Copy !req
310. What's wrong?
Copy !req
311. Those are people
out there.
Copy !req
312. Oh. All this time
y'all thought
Copy !req
313. we was going to be
performing for some smurfs?
Copy !req
314. Come on, look.
Let's just pretend
it's another rehearsal.
Copy !req
315. Forget it.
We're not ready
for the public.
Copy !req
316. How do you think
I feel?
Copy !req
317. We've got our futures
to think about.
Copy !req
318. Listen, I don't think
you guys understand.
Copy !req
319. If we don't get out there,
I'm not going to graduate.
Copy !req
320. You're breaking
my heart.
Copy !req
321. You are so cute.
Copy !req
322. If you guys
don't let me graduate,
Copy !req
323. I'll have
to mess y'all up.
Copy !req
324. Showtime!
Copy !req
325. That's right.
Copy !req
326. Today, for your
listening pleasure,
Copy !req
327. let us welcome
the little rays
of sunshine.
Copy !req
328. That's my jessie,
the one with the braids.
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329. That's my will, the one
with the mustache.
Copy !req
330. Hey, Mike, can we get
a little James brown?
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331. Oww!
Copy !req
332. I didn't hear you.
I said, can we get
a little James brown?
Copy !req
333. Oww!
Copy !req
334. Here we go, y'all.
I'm sayin'--
Copy !req
335. now, here we go.
Copy !req
336. say, maestro, can we get
a little walking music?
Copy !req
337. Posse out.
Copy !req
338. Ah! Ha ha ha!
Copy !req
339. Thanks, will.
You got us through
a tough one.
Copy !req
340. Oh, ok.
Copy !req
341. I guess that means
Copy !req
342. you're noticing
how truly fly I am.
Copy !req
343. Speaking of flies,
yours is open.
Copy !req
344. Ooh. My tutu fly.
Ahem!
Copy !req
345. Will! Will.
Copy !req
346. Congratulations.
Copy !req
347. Thank you.
Copy !req
348. You can walk
with your classmates.
Copy !req
349. I'm passing you.
Copy !req
350. Hey, thanks a lot,
Mrs. bassin.
You're welcome.
Copy !req
351. And trust me,
I learned
Copy !req
352. a valuable lesson
from this.
Copy !req
353. What's that?
Copy !req
354. Uh...
Copy !req
355. I ain't never having
no kids.
Copy !req
356. Oh!
Copy !req
357. Good luck.
Copy !req
358. Come on, kids.
Let's get out of here.
Copy !req
359. Hey, will,
I caught your act.
Copy !req
360. Oh, baby, listen—
check it out—
Copy !req
361. you know, you really
surprised me.
Copy !req
362. That was the most
sensitive,
Copy !req
363. the most
beautiful thing
I've ever seen.
Copy !req
364. And nothing
turns me on more
Copy !req
365. than sensitivity
in a man.
Copy !req
366. Oh, girl, you don't know
the half of it.
Copy !req
367. Let me tell you,
I be boo-hooing
during Lassie.
Copy !req
368. Boo-hoo!
Copy !req
369. Before I came here today,
I was afraid,
Copy !req
370. as I'm sure
many of you are.
Copy !req
371. It seems these days,
there's a lot
to be afraid of.
Copy !req
372. The world can be
a pretty scary place.
Copy !req
373. But how can one person
make a difference?
Copy !req
374. I'll tell you
what I'm going to do.
Copy !req
375. I'm going to take
the education I've received
Copy !req
376. and use it to give back
to those less fortunate.
Copy !req
377. Your cousin's
really deep.
Copy !req
378. And he doesn't even
seem nervous.
Copy !req
379. Oh, yeah.
See, check it out.
Copy !req
380. I gave him
a little advice.
Copy !req
381. I told him
to picture somebody
Copy !req
382. that he—he
really admires,
Copy !req
383. and, um, well,
you know,
Copy !req
384. he—he probably
picturing me.
Copy !req
385. Oh.
Copy !req
386. And in closing...
Copy !req
387. I'd like to thank
my teachers
and my classmates
Copy !req
388. for 4 great years...
Copy !req
389. And my family for
their love and support...
Copy !req
390. And my best friend,
Copy !req
391. someone who
stuck beside me
Copy !req
392. and kept me
out of trouble—
Copy !req
393. and maybe got me
into it, too.
Copy !req
394. Congratulations.
Copy !req
395. Lisa Armstrong...
Copy !req
396. Adam Baker...
Copy !req
397. Carlton banks...
Copy !req
398. John Simpson...
Copy !req
399. Will Smith.
Copy !req
400. Oh! Ahh! Ahh!
Copy !req
401. Aghh!
Copy !req
402. Now, when you're up there,
just picture someone
that you really admire
Copy !req
403. watching you
with love and approval.
Copy !req
404. Go on, try it.
Copy !req
405. I'm sorry.
I couldn't resist.
I'm sorry.
Copy !req