1. Geoffrey, have you seen Will?Copy !req
2. Master William sits in his room
sadly staring out of the window, madam...Copy !req
3. quiet as a church mouse.Copy !req
4. Hasn't spoken a word for hours.
What a shame.Copy !req
5. Poor homesick baby.Copy !req
6. I have an idea. If Will is that homesick,
let's send him home.Copy !req
7. All he's been talking about is Philadelphia.Copy !req
8. I hope these
Philadelphia cheese steaks cheer him up.Copy !req
9. I don't know what you and Will see
in those vile concoctions.Copy !req
10. Which is why you only ate five of them?Copy !req
11. Will, we know you're homesick,
so we got you something to cheer you up.Copy !req
12. Thanks.Copy !req
13. Oh, thanks a lot.Copy !req
14. What is it?Copy !req
15. It's a sandwich composed of cheese,
steak, and a croissant de boulanger...Copy !req
16. from the Cafe Antoinette in Beverly Hills.Copy !req
17. It's a Philadelphia cheese steak, Will.Copy !req
18. Nice try, Uncle Phil,
but this is not a Philadelphia cheese steak.Copy !req
19. See, look at the bag. No grease stain.Copy !req
20. if this were authentic, you could see
right through the bag by now.Copy !req
21. I'm sorry you don't like it.
I'll dispose of it later.Copy !req
22. - I'll throw it out.
- I'll dispose of it, Ashley.Copy !req
23. You know where you get
the best cheese steaks in Philly?Copy !req
24. Pat's Steaks on Passyunk Avenue.Copy !req
25. Me and my buddy lce Tray used
to go there every Friday.Copy !req
26. We used to steal...Copy !req
27. I mean, we would enjoy them there often.Copy !req
28. lce Tray? isn't he the one
you're always talking about?Copy !req
29. Did I ever tell you about the story
in the middle of the winter?Copy !req
30. lce Tray grabbed onto the back of a bus
and it was so cold, his face got stuck.Copy !req
31. And he was dragged around the city.Copy !req
32. He couldn't get off till he hit a bump
on the Ben Franklin Bridge.Copy !req
33. That's a story we can all relate to.Copy !req
34. Cut it out, Philip. He misses his friend.Copy !req
35. lce Tray's more like my big brother,
though.Copy !req
36. I've got a good idea. Why don't we fly him
out for a weekend visit?Copy !req
37. You mean it, Aunt Viv?
I'm down with that.Copy !req
38. Word up. This is gonna be cold stupid
on the serious tip.Copy !req
39. What did you say, young lady?Copy !req
40. I said that this is
quite an exceptional idea, Daddy.Copy !req
41. Peachy-keen, even. Later, my man.Copy !req
42. Wonderful. First Will, now Ashley.
I can't wait till lce Box gets here.Copy !req
43. No, it's lce Tray, Uncle Phil.Copy !req
44. lce Tray. I apologize.
lce Box would be an idiotic name.Copy !req
45. Yeah, it would.Copy !req
46. Aunt Viv, this is going to be great.Copy !req
47. I can't wait to show him
all the strange sights of L.A.Copy !req
48. I don't even know where to begin.
I'll take him to Disneyland, to Marineland—Copy !req
49. - Dad, I need $200.
- I'll take him to Hilaryland.Copy !req
50. - Why do you need $200, Hilary?
- For books. I'm changing my major.Copy !req
51. - To what?
- Communications.Copy !req
52. Exactly what does that entail?Copy !req
53. You know, it's like communications.Copy !req
54. It's, like, the study of communicating,
okay?Copy !req
55. - Why do you want to major in that?
- Because I'm good at it.Copy !req
56. So I presume this is
the official lce Tray greeting party.Copy !req
57. - Tray!
- Prince! Homey, get in there.Copy !req
58. Guys, you're going to hurt each other.Copy !req
59. That's okay, Vivian.
Let's see where this goes.Copy !req
60. lce Tray, we didn't hear you come in.
Geoffrey, did you leave the door open?Copy !req
61. - Well, no.
- I guess we must have left it unlocked.Copy !req
62. "Well, no."Copy !req
63. You still got it, man.Copy !req
64. Hi, I'm Vivian, Will's aunt.Copy !req
65. Will, why don't you introduce lce Tray
to your family?Copy !req
66. I'm sorry. This is my little cousin Ashley.Copy !req
67. - Hi.
- This is my bodyguard, Geoffrey.Copy !req
68. All of this is my Uncle Phil.Copy !req
69. Remember we used to say that Daffy Duck
must have a little brother somewhere?Copy !req
70. Meet my cousin Carlton.Copy !req
71. Can't touch this.Copy !req
72. Geoffrey, would you take
lce Tray's luggage to his room?Copy !req
73. Certainly, madam.Copy !req
74. So you're also
a disadvantaged inner-city youth, I hear.Copy !req
75. - Yo, man, what's with him?
- It's a tan.Copy !req
76. - What up on the schoolyard?
- School, man.Copy !req
77. - I don't bother it, and it don't bother me.
- You don't go to school, lce Tray?Copy !req
78. Sure I do. I've been held back
in the 10th grade three times in a row.Copy !req
79. Three times?Copy !req
80. See, my motto is,
when I find a grade I like, I stick with it.Copy !req
81. Education is the mortar
that builds the temple of success.Copy !req
82. - That's what I personally think.
- Like who cares?Copy !req
83. What's up with Smooth, Jocko,
and O-Money?Copy !req
84. Smooth and Jocko got their own
singing group now.Copy !req
85. And O-Money got his hair cut
to look like the Chrysler Building.Copy !req
86. That's good, though, man.Copy !req
87. That Mount Rushmore thing
was not working.Copy !req
88. This is dope, man.Copy !req
89. I'll just kick back here for a few days,
let somebody else do all the work.Copy !req
90. Excuse me, young man. In this house,
everyone carries his own weight.Copy !req
91. Too easy.Copy !req
92. Come on, Daddy. Tray's on vacation.Copy !req
93. See, my motto is...Copy !req
94. Lord, if there's anything like work
around my heart, please remove it.Copy !req
95. I smell something greasy.Copy !req
96. Too easy.Copy !req
97. A cheese steak! This is the real deal.Copy !req
98. Yo, man. Could I get $100?Copy !req
99. - For what?
- To pay the limo dude.Copy !req
100. You took a limo?Copy !req
101. Prince said y'all was loaded,
and when in Rome, do as.Copy !req
102. - $100?
- I got a cash flow problem.Copy !req
103. You see, my Korean Gucci bags,
they just ain't been moving lately.Copy !req
104. Tray, let's pay the dude.Copy !req
105. What's up with the Blake sisters,
they still live on 43rd St.?Copy !req
106. Yeah, man,
they got their own 900 number now.Copy !req
107. He's some piece of work.Copy !req
108. We're getting a rottweiler.Copy !req
109. I know he seems rough around the edges
but we should all give him a chance.Copy !req
110. When you really look at it,
how different is lce Tray from Carlton?Copy !req
111. With all due respect, Mom, I think
he's a little fonder of the 10th grade than l.Copy !req
112. Hold up. What about that one girl
you went out with...Copy !req
113. that Latiqua?Copy !req
114. Man, that girl was ugly.Copy !req
115. - Ugly? You crazy, man.
- She was so ugly, she was oogly.Copy !req
116. She was so ugly,
Freddy Krueger had nightmares about her.Copy !req
117. At least she was smart.Copy !req
118. - That girl you was with—
- Stacy.Copy !req
119. That girl was so dumb,
it took her an hour to cook Minute Rice.Copy !req
120. Wait a minute.
Let's talk about skinny girls.Copy !req
121. - Who's skinny?
- That Julie you went out with?Copy !req
122. She was so skinny,
you could tie a rope around her head...Copy !req
123. and use her like a tetherball pole.Copy !req
124. Hold it. Back to Stacy.Copy !req
125. Stacy was so dumb.
Do you know how dumb Stacy was?Copy !req
126. - How dumb was Stacy?
- Stacy was so dumb...Copy !req
127. that she took the Pepsi Challenge
and chose Jif.Copy !req
128. This is dope, man.Copy !req
129. Look at this. Crystal, china dolls, a book.Copy !req
130. You know people are rich when they got
all this stuff they got no use for.Copy !req
131. Crime and Punishment.Copy !req
132. That's just some tired old book
Carlton's reading.Copy !req
133. Really? "From the library
of Master William Smith."Copy !req
134. Who's tired now, homey?Copy !req
135. They're forcing us to read that at school.
I ain't gonna read it.Copy !req
136. Wait. This is your handwriting.
"lntriguing duality?"Copy !req
137. Same old Prince, man.Copy !req
138. When I first met you,
you was carrying books in a pizza box...Copy !req
139. so nobody knew you were studying.Copy !req
140. That was cool, till them guys jumped me,
trying to steal my pizza.Copy !req
141. Yo, they was upset.Copy !req
142. You got a good deal here, homey.
Don't blow it.Copy !req
143. - I'll go grab us some cheese steaks.
- All right.Copy !req
144. Hi.Copy !req
145. Hi.Copy !req
146. Vivian, I think you're blowing
this whole thing out of proportion.Copy !req
147. Tell me the story again.
And this time, just the facts.Copy !req
148. I'll give you a transcript, Philip.Copy !req
149. "Hi." Hilary: "Hi."Copy !req
150. I don't get it.
What could she possibly see in him?Copy !req
151. He's got a nice smile, and cool hair.Copy !req
152. Hair? I thought it was a hat.Copy !req
153. I think I should have gotten
a larger tattoo, Tray.Copy !req
154. Tattoo?Copy !req
155. - I got a tattoo of Tray's initials.
- Where?Copy !req
156. Don't worry, Mrs. Banks.
No one will ever see it.Copy !req
157. I'm gonna go put this stuff
up in my bedroom.Copy !req
158. - I'll go with you.
- So will l.Copy !req
159. Aunt Viv, you got to be proud of yourself.Copy !req
160. Pride doesn't quite capture it, Will.Copy !req
161. It was your idea to bring Tray out here.Copy !req
162. Hilary used to walk around all the time
with such a sour look on her face.Copy !req
163. I used to say to myself,
she just needs one good friend.Copy !req
164. He does seem like
an interesting young man.Copy !req
165. You've only seen one side of him.
He's joking around, but he can be serious.Copy !req
166. Really?Copy !req
167. Seriously. If somebody's chasing him,
he can jack a fence like that.Copy !req
168. But if somebody catch him,
it don't matter.Copy !req
169. The boy got a crazy rabbit punch,
like you don't even see it coming.Copy !req
170. You out of there.Copy !req
171. Let's go check out that swimming pool,
Prince.Copy !req
172. - See you later, babe.
- Okay, lcy.Copy !req
173. It's nice to see you and lce Tray
getting along.Copy !req
174. I'm sorry he couldn't stay longer.Copy !req
175. Don't worry, I've got it all figured out.
He can come visit every other weekend.Copy !req
176. When the 10th grade lets out,
he can come stay in the pool house.Copy !req
177. Daddy can get him a job at the office.Copy !req
178. What job could he have in the law firm?Copy !req
179. I don't know. Lawyer?Copy !req
180. Anyways, Mom, don't worry.
This is our problem, not yours.Copy !req
181. The only thing I want to say is thank you.Copy !req
182. For what?Copy !req
183. You, like, saw right past
his rough-tough exterior...Copy !req
184. and you welcomed him into our home.Copy !req
185. I'm so proud of you, Mom.Copy !req
186. I just want to share my joy with you.Copy !req
187. I haven't been this happy
since I bought my Giorgio Armani suit.Copy !req
188. This is serious.
Hilary wants him to live in our pool house.Copy !req
189. That shouldn't matter to you, Vivian.
You're the one who invited Ashtray.Copy !req
190. In fact, why don't we invite some more
of Will's friends out?Copy !req
191. Let's just put a big neon sign out in front
of the house that says "Homeboy Hotel."Copy !req
192. That's it. I want him out of this house.Copy !req
193. You're making the classic mistake.
Don't you know that?Copy !req
194. I have the perfect solution
for dealing with Mr. lce Pick.Copy !req
195. - You do?
- My street savvy...Copy !req
196. should not be taken lightly.Copy !req
197. - She's rebelling against us.
- So?Copy !req
198. So any hostility
will only drive her closer to him.Copy !req
199. We have to embrace him,
welcome him into the family...Copy !req
200. take him out for a nice meal,
smother him with acceptance.Copy !req
201. Once the element of rebellion is gone,
the relationship will lose its appeal.Copy !req
202. - What if that doesn't work?
- It'll work.Copy !req
203. You two make such a lovely, lovely couple.Copy !req
204. Dad, has Mom been drinking?Copy !req
205. Nonsense, Carlton.Copy !req
206. She's just being polite
to our lovely houseguest.Copy !req
207. Have you been drinking?Copy !req
208. Tray, check this.Copy !req
209. - That's dope, man.
- Let me see.Copy !req
210. Nice catch, lady.Copy !req
211. Oh, God, Tray, you are so funny.
isn't he funny, everyone?Copy !req
212. Not to me. Of course, I'm sober.Copy !req
213. I think escargots all around for starters.Copy !req
214. - Snails.
- Oh, no.Copy !req
215. I don't eat nothing that leaves a trail.Copy !req
216. God, Tray, you slay me.Copy !req
217. He busts me up.Copy !req
218. Before we get started,
I'd like to propose a toast.Copy !req
219. Tray, since this is your last night here...Copy !req
220. Vivian and I would just like to say
that we're both extremely happy...Copy !req
221. that Hilary's found that special someone,
that special love.Copy !req
222. I can just see Hilary and Tray in their tiny
little love nest in Philadelphia...Copy !req
223. with the pitter-patter
of five little lce Cubes.Copy !req
224. Hilary changing diapers
and preparing a lovely meal...Copy !req
225. while her loving husband
is working his night job on the corner...Copy !req
226. as a Korean Gucci bag representative.Copy !req
227. Hilary, this is for those wonderful years
in Philadelphia.Copy !req
228. I guess I'll be driving home tonight.Copy !req
229. I am so happy.Copy !req
230. Dad, are you saying
that you wouldn't mind...Copy !req
231. if Tray and l, like, got married?Copy !req
232. Mind?Copy !req
233. - Did you hear that, Vivian?
- Mind?Copy !req
234. That's good, because Hilary and l
got married this afternoon.Copy !req
235. Hilary, no!Copy !req
236. How could you do this to us?
How could you be so stupid?Copy !req
237. Do you realize you've gone and ruined
your life? This boy doesn't care—Copy !req
238. Mom, take it down 1,000.Copy !req
239. It's only a joke. We didn't get married.Copy !req
240. We just wanted to see what you'd do.Copy !req
241. See, baby, I told you they'd flip.Copy !req
242. Homey, order me three steaks and a salad.
Come on, baby. Let's dance.Copy !req
243. Got married.Copy !req
244. Sir, Master Tray's all packed
and ready to depart.Copy !req
245. Excellent, Geoffrey.Copy !req
246. Let's afford him everything we can
in getting him on his way.Copy !req
247. Shall I call for a car, sir,
or just shoot him out of a cannon?Copy !req
248. So, that really is a wonderful restaurant,
isn't it?Copy !req
249. Yeah.Copy !req
250. I think everybody had a good time,
don't you?Copy !req
251. I really enjoyed meeting lce Tray
this weekend.Copy !req
252. Any time you want to invite any
of your other friends, just let us know.Copy !req
253. - You enjoyed it?
- Yeah, a lot.Copy !req
254. Wasn't Hilary falling in love
with Tray just the icing on the cake?Copy !req
255. - I'm glad they had fun together.
- Me, too.Copy !req
256. It's just a shame he had to leave
before he had a chance to ruin her life.Copy !req
257. - I'm sorry I said that, it's just that—
- But you meant it.Copy !req
258. It was cool as long as Tray was
some clown to come out here...Copy !req
259. and bring me some cheese steaks
and cheer me up.Copy !req
260. Hold on. The second you found out
Hilary liked him, you wanted him out.Copy !req
261. That's something I'd expect
from Uncle Phil, not from you, Aunt Viv.Copy !req
262. - Hilary is my daughter, Will.
- And Tray is my best friend.Copy !req
263. We grew up together.
We're from the same neighborhood.Copy !req
264. We're the same person.Copy !req
265. if Tray's not good enough for this family,
then maybe I'm not.Copy !req
266. - You are not the same person.
- I know who I am.Copy !req
267. No, you listen to me.
I can see why you like lce Tray.Copy !req
268. He's a lot of fun.
Everything's a joke to him.Copy !req
269. School, work, people.
He doesn't care about anything.Copy !req
270. He always managed to care about me.Copy !req
271. I'm glad he's a good friend,
but that doesn't change who he is.Copy !req
272. I'm sorry, but a young man his age
should be able to do something else...Copy !req
273. besides fight and jump fences.Copy !req
274. - You weren't there.
- I know, but still—Copy !req
275. When I was in seventh grade,
trying to bring books home from school...Copy !req
276. the kids would jump me,
so Tray started walking me home.Copy !req
277. if he hadn't been there to throw those
punches and help me jump fences...Copy !req
278. then maybe I wouldn't be here.Copy !req
279. While he was busy protecting your books,
where the hell were his?Copy !req
280. What's that got to do with anything?Copy !req
281. I'm glad he cared so much about you.Copy !req
282. But why doesn't he care as much
about himself?Copy !req
283. Because nobody was there for Tray.Copy !req
284. if he hadn't been there to cover my back,
maybe I wouldn't care about myself either.Copy !req
285. And that would be an awful waste.Copy !req
286. I shall load Mr. Tray's belongings
into the cannon.Copy !req
287. I mean cab, madam.Copy !req
288. We miss you in the 'hood, homeboy.
Why don't you come on back with me?Copy !req
289. No, I better cool out here, man.Copy !req
290. if Uncle Phil woke up and I wasn't here,
he'd have a nervous breakdown.Copy !req
291. I'd recover, Will.Copy !req
292. I'm really going to miss you, lce Tray.Copy !req
293. Bye, Mrs. Banks. Thanks for inviting me.
We gotta do this again.Copy !req
294. Have a safe trip back.
Take care of yourself.Copy !req
295. Thanks.Copy !req
296. Snap. I almost forgot.
I got a little something for y'all.Copy !req
297. - That's our china dog.
- Yeah.Copy !req
298. I figured y'all were so nice to me
and everything that I don't need it.Copy !req
299. That was a joke.Copy !req
300. You've become a part of my spirit
that's never been touched before.Copy !req
301. I feel a oneness with you,
and now that you're leaving I just...Copy !req
302. have this sense that life will be empty,
hollow, and meaningless.Copy !req
303. Peep this, babe.Copy !req
304. See, I have this first-class ticket.Copy !req
305. We could go down to the airport
and trade it for two coach tickets...Copy !req
306. and you could come back to Philly
with me. What do you think?Copy !req
307. Coach?Copy !req