1. Ladies and gentlemen,
it's "The Eric Andre Show"!
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2. Aaah!
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3. Aah! Aaaah!
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4. Aah! Aah! Aaah!
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5. Aah! Aah!
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6. K.O.!
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7. Aah! Aah! Aaah!
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8. Uh, uh...
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9. I'm bad.
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10. Ugh!
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11. Whew.
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12. So, you ever see this movie
"My Big Fat Greek Wedding"?
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13. Yeah, I saw it like once.
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14. Why can't they just call it
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15. "My Plus Size
Mediterranean Civil Union"?
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16. - Hey, how you doing?
- Okay. How are you?
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17. Weird if I tried on,
like, a wig?
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18. I like this one.
This looks great, right?
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19. How does it look?
That's good, right?
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20. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
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21. I'm gonna do some lipstick,
too, I think.
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22. Oh, yeah.
So, I look beautiful. Yeah.
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23. What do you think?
Am I ready for the ball?
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24. Excuse me, sir.
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25. Have you seen this man?
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26. He's wanted for murder.
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27. Yes.
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28. Don't you
say a fucking word.
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29. Shh.
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30. Have you seen him?
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31. I just—
I need to get an answer.
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32. - We're looking.
- Hsss.
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33. What's up?
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34. My wig?
No, I'm still trying it on.
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35. - No, no, no, no, no.
- I would like the wig back, please.
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36. I look good. Why?
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37. No, no, no, no, no.
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38. No, I can— I can...
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39. Excuse me.
You seen this man?
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40. He's been going around
impersonating a cop.
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41. He might look
a little different.
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42. Don't you
say a fucking word.
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43. - Don't you say a fucking word.
- Don't you say a fucking word.
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44. Don't you say
a fucking word.
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45. Don't you say
a fucking word.
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46. Don't you say
a fucking word!
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47. Aaah!
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48. What the fucking shit?
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49. So, that's what they do
out here?
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50. Ladies and gentlemen,
Chet Hanks!
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51. Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Chet.
Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Chet.
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52. Thank you for being here.
Chet Hanks!
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53. Yeah, man. What's up, man?
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54. Ya know mean?
You know what I'm sayin'? Yeah.
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55. You're like "Ali G Show"
24 hours a day, my dawg.
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56. That's right.
That's right.
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57. Yeah.
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58. - Ah, you know, man.
- What are you working on?
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59. Nothing.
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60. That makes sense.
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61. What's the difference between
Tom Hanks and Tom Cruise?
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62. Uh...
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63. Tom Cruise, um...
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64. is not my dad.
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65. Yeaaaaah!
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66. That makes sense.
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67. If your dad's rude to you,
do you go,
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68. "Hanks, but no Hanks"?
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69. Give a man enough rope,
he'll Hanks himself.
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70. Phew!
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71. You ever get pulled over,
you look at the cop,
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72. you just hand him a copy
of "Forrest Gump" and you go,
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73. "Let me on my way, pig"?
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74. Bah!
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75. What is going on
with you?
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76. Dude, I'm just here,
you know?
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77. What the hell
happened to you?
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78. I know, I know, I know.
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79. You are tense.
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80. I'm walking on fucking
eggshells up here.
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81. Hey, you want a Kraz
Hard Segregated Seltzer?
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82. They got Kraz for whites
and Kraz for blacks.
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83. Don't be too jealous now.
I get to drink both.
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84. Yeah.
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85. I'm bringing your taste buds
back to Birmingham, brother.
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86. Give me
the black one.
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87. Hey, how you doing?
Hi.
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88. - Fine if I just drop this here?
- Oh, yeah.
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89. Mind if I use your restroom
real quick?
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90. Do you know where it is?
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91. - I've been here a bunch.
- Oh, okay. Cool.
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92. Oh, hell no.
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93. Aah!
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94. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
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95. - Hi!
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96. I'm Drew Barrymore.
I'm here to help.
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97. It's what I do!
Are you okay?
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98. No. I'm not okay.
Unh-unh.
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99. I sense distress,
and I'm an empath.
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100. Mm, no, not today.
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101. That's Wolverine piss.
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102. What the fuck is that?
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103. That's wolverine piss, alright.
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104. That is definitely
- not my box.
- Okay.
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105. And there is definitely not a—
how you say— wolverine inside.
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106. Huh.
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107. I bid you adieu!
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108. Not today, mnh-mnh.
Not today.
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109. Only on CBS.
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110. Should I get
tactical with it?
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111. Check it out.
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112. Talk about Tom Cruise.
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113. It was like
"The Musical."
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114. Your blood look like
a little Michael Jordan.
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115. Yeah.
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116. And we're back
with Chet Haze.
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117. - It's not Haze, dude.
- You want Haze or Hanks?
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118. Hanks, dude.
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119. Is it 'cause...
Is it 'cause, uh...
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120. You want to hear
my Ice-T impression?
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121. Oh, shit.
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122. You know what I mean?
So, I'm just...
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123. Ladies and gentlemen,
Gay Blade.
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124. So, people give you shit
for speaking patois?
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125. - Yeah.
- What other cultures
have you considered integrating
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126. into your personality?
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127. Ah, yeah.
You know, you want some milk?
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128. You want a glass of milk?
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129. It's fucking hot out here.
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130. When it comes to selling
real estate,
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131. sometimes things get
a little crazy.
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132. - Hey, how you doing?
- I'm doing alright.
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133. - Pleasure.
- Nice to meet you.
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134. Come on in. Have a seat.
Have a seat.
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135. Just write down your goals,
like, what your ideal house is.
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136. Hey!
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137. Give me—
this is my colleague.
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138. Just give me a second.
I just need to do powwow
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139. real quick.
We'll just have a quick meeting.
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140. - Just give me two seconds.
- Sure.
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141. Okay.
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142. - Oh, hey.
- Hey.
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143. Hey.
You're still here?
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144. Yeah. Yeah.
The restroom's there.
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145. Listen, my wife's pulling up
in like 20 minutes, so just...
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146. let's leave that meeting
off the books.
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147. You want me to knock
a couple bucks off the price?
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148. Huh?
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149. Just think about it.
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150. $50,000 off?
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151. Eh... You ever heard of Hedonism?
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152. Yes.
You could watch.
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153. You come to Jamaica
with us.
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154. All expenses paid.
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155. Ah!
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156. But now the wheels
are turning.
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157. My man.
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158. No one
would have to know.
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159. Deal.
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160. I love you.
Mm?
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161. You know her from TV's
and movies—
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162. Natasha Lyonne!
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163. Wow.
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164. A mermaid,
before my very eyes.
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165. Hey!
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166. Little Red.
What's up, girl?
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167. - Hello!
- Hello!
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168. You created
"Russian Doll."Co-created.
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169. Why not call the show
"Groundhog's Day"?
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170. Ehh..."... The Series."
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171. Yeah. This season—You know what I mean?
You ever see that movie?
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172. You've seen "Groundhog's Day"
with Bill Murray, right?
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173. Yeah.
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174. You could do it.
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175. Son, you have no idea how lucky
you are in this country.
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176. Dad... Do you understand
what it was like
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177. I-I— I don't—Do you have any idea?
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178. Dad, in the middle of this
Natasha Lyonne interview,
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179. you thought this was
a good time to reminisce—
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180. Every time
is a good time
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181. to reminisce
about Yugoslavia?
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182. - You comin' home.
- You don't appreciate
the old country!
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183. Aaaaah!
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184. Hyah!
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185. Hyah!
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186. Ladies and gentlemen,
Diplo!
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187. Ladies and gentlemen,
Whiplo!
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188. Ladies and gentlemen,
Dip-lo.
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189. Ladies and gentlemen,
Kick-lo.
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190. This sucks.
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191. Aaaaah!
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192. God damn it!
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