The Eric Andre Show 5x1

Directed by

Judy Greer as Self • Adam Rippon as Self • Anderson .Paak as Self • Hannibal Buress as Self

Eric & Hannibal are back! Eric welcomes Judy Greer and Adam Rippon, and befriends a lost rat on the subway, trying to find its original owner. Also - beer chugging musical guest Anderson Six .Paak!

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!req The Eric Andre Show 5x1 [02:32]
!req The Eric Andre Show 5x1 [The Eric Andre Show 5x1]
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For quotes, now you can request by index (e.g !req The Eric Andre Show 5x1 [10-11]; !req The Eric Andre Show 5x1 [20] [24]). Keep in mind, though, that index numbers might change at any time.
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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. Ladies and gentlemen, it's "The Eric Andre Show"!

2. Welcome to the fifth season of "The Eric Andre Show"!

3. We got a new band!

4. Yes!

5. We got a new guy!

6. Hannibal Buress is back, baby!

7. I'm so disappointed in you right now.

8. What? Why?

9. - What is all this? - It's decadence.

10. Why are some of them black?

11. - I needed to see the vibe. - Where's your hair?

12. It's gone, baby. I don't need it anymore.

13. I do not like it as a bald.

14. What about like a Vin Diesel kind of thing?

15. No. You don't think I could be a bouncer?

16. For what? The Grease Shop?

17. There's no such think as a grease shop.

18. There is a grease shop!

19. There's no grease shop, Hannibal!

20. They will create one because you'd be perfect for the job!

21. Power to the ranch.

22. Unh! Dude, I like what I see.

23. Can you burn this CD for me?

24. It's the secret recipe for Crystal Pepsi.

25. I like your style, dude. Are you hardened?

26. Do you want to blaze this synthetic weed?

27. It gave Demi Moore a seizure.

28. You seem mellow. You mind if I dance?

29. Dance for me, baby!

30. - Wow, dude! - Why? What's —

31. I knew I recognized you.

32. Dude, we docked dicks at the Lollapalooza Cruise.

33. You're Benedick Popcorn, right?

34. What's up, Benedick?

35. Dude, I took this reiki class with Dave Navarro.

36. He left this one heckler speechless.

37. Whoa! You're Woke Wendy!

38. You're the CEO of Game Gear.

39. Do you got steroid rage or something, dude?

40. You wanna burn some Jared Kush Nerd?

41. What's up, Jared Kush Nerd?

42. Let me hear your British accent. Give me a sentence.

43. Quid. Two quid. Mate.

44. Ladies and gentlemen, one of my favorite actresses,

45. Judy Greer!

46. Judy!

47. Sit your beautiful black ass down, Judy.

48. This is low.

49. - Are you from Detroit? - Yes.

50. I can tell by your... eight smile.

51. - Ohh! - Booooooo!

52. What do you mean "boo"? That was good!

53. What are you talking about? Boo!

54. - Hey. Ohh! - Oh, my God! That was so loud.

55. Did you want a hot dog?

56. I don't eat hot dogs.

57. - Oh, really? - I mean, not those.

58. Well, you got to eat some dogs, baby!

59. - You seem on edge.

60. Aah!

61. Thank God. I am starving.

62. - You want a hot dog? - I don't.

63. You want any food?

64. No.

65. Oh. Oh! The coffee!

66. Oh. Yeah.

67. Aah!

68. Oh. Christ.

69. Let's switch this whole interview up, Johnny Depp style.

70. You know what I mean? Oh. Okay.

71. Ohh!

72. You have to claim everything

73. when you go through Australian customs.

74. I save every rat I find out there.

75. I don't have the heart to see 'em die.

76. - I found this rat on the train. What?

77. I rescued it. A rat from the subway.

78. Isn't it cute? Come on, man!

79. He was dying, and I pushed on his chest to resuscitate him.

80. How you got it on you and shit?

81. I'm trying to find the original owner.

82. He's pissin' and shittin' all down my collar.

83. He's big, and he's clawing.

84. Look at these frat guys. They always pass our drunk.

85. Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

86. - What the? - It's my last day.

87. It's gonna be your last meal if you don't stop that shit!

88. Hey, what if a pregnant woman comes on?

89. Well, she don't want to see that little shit you got, either!

90. When you just leave "Catcher in the Rye"

91. next to 'em, cops think they're cuckoo when they wake up.

92. The wrong with you?

93. - You got a husband? - You say something about —

94. Okay, alright, alright. Hey, hey, hey.

95. You want a problem, you gonna get one.

96. Sorry. I think you're beautiful. I have a crush on you.

97. Secret's out. Okay.

98. Are you one of the most emotionally stable actors?

99. 'Cause most actors are like, "Blblb! Where's my medicine?"

100. Ohh. They're like, "Right this way, Mr. del Toro."

101. Would you like to, in the future, if you're...

102. Yeah. You'll be okay.

103. Everything okay. Don't worry.

104. Don't worry right now.

105. It's — Your future is okay.

106. Hey, you ever see that movie "Bird Box"?

107. Yeah.

108. Neither have I.

109. And we're back with Judy Greer.

110. I've been secretly videotaping

111. my nanny in my bathroom and I've been like

112. catching her sweet drippin's

113. in a secret jar

114. - Eww. - I built into my toilet.

115. Let's look at a clip of my nanny going

116. - Oh! - to the restroom.

117. You don't have that.

118. That's definitely illegal.

119. Check it out.

120. It's my nanny's natural bobas.

121. Ugh.

122. You ever punish yourself?

123. Uhh...

124. Okay, let me just check the receipt real quick. - Sure, go ahead.

125. Go for it.

126. Okay.

127. Let me just put some lo mein on these clothes.

128. Full disclosure... - Ah!

129. I made too much.

130. What are you doing?

131. I gotta get rid of this lo mein.

132. - What are you doing? - This is the store policy.

133. What are you talking about?

134. Why are you destroying the merchandise?

135. That's my grandmama's recipe, and it came

136. all the way from Sicily. - Are you kidding me?

137. Stop it! - Dude, don't blame me.

138. Blame social media. - No! Stop it!

139. Here, you want some cigarettes?

140. Get away from me! I don't want that!

141. - They're mentholated. - I don't smoke.

142. This guy is standing here with lo mein,

143. and he put lo mein in the bag

144. and, all of a sudden, he put lo mein in the bag.

145. It tastes great.

146. Ladies and gentlemen,

147. Olympic figure skater

148. Adam Rippon!

149. - Rippon.

150. Yeah.

151. What's up, Adam? You look great!

152. Thank you. I mean, you look great.

153. - Did you see "I, Tonya"? - I loved it.

154. What's your diet?

155. Did something fall?

156. Little bits of carpet.

157. Why was the carpet up there?

158. It's hard to say.

159. - What are you up to? - I just wrote a book.

160. How many pages?

161. Like 270.

162. Should it —

163. Hey, whether you're Eve or Steve,

164. this Adam is one juicy apple,

165. and I wouldn't mind to take a bite.

166. Yeah!

167. That was really good.

168. Oh! Holy! - Oh, my —

169. Shit. There's some shit underneath the couch.

170. - It's broken. - No. - You have spiked boots.

171. You're supposed to be fearless.

172. - You're a strange cat with spiked boots. - No. I can —

173. Spiked boots.

174. You're supposed to be fearless.

175. - You're supposed to be fearless. - Wait.

176. Oof. This coffee is

177. What the?

178. How long does this coffee go for?

179. What's wrong with this thing?

180. I told you to stop drinking that shit.

181. I'm still afraid to like sit in this chair.

182. It's all good. You're conquerin' your fears.

183. You livin' up to those spiked boots.

184. I heard they — No, no, no, no, no.

185. - Look. Spiked boots. - Spiked boots!

186. - Spiked boots. - Spiked boots steppin' it up!

187. I almost made this chair dirtier.

188. - Damn. - Oh, my God. I can't sit.

189. I can't — - Let's have Hannibal Buress

190. play some tubular bells for us, huh?

191. Aaah!

192. Aaaaaaah!

193. - Argh! - Ohhhhh!

194. And we are back with Adam Rippon.

195. Yeah!

196. What? Oh! Oh! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

197. Okay, I'm Spriked up.

198. Sprite building's right across the street.

199. Sprite.

200. Outta the way!

201. Yaah!

202. I tried to do a trick on a Citi Bike.

203. I-I'm gonna fall. - Oh, my God.

204. No, no, no, no, no. His leg is broken.

205. Help me! Help!

206. I tried to do a trick to get on Instagram,

207. to get a Sprite sponsorship to impress my son.

208. No, don't call the cops.

209. My son's calling me.

210. Can you just grab it? That's my son calling.

211. Okay. Hello?

212. I'm just trying to coparent in a difficult situation

213. right now with the stepdad, Dennis,

214. and it got in my head before the jump.

215. Don't move!

216. Aaaah!

217. Oh! Is he peeing on himself?

218. I shit blood.

219. Oh, thank God I got a Sprite.

220. You know, Sprite's a natural stringent.

221. Oh, dammit.

222. Help!

223. Sprite.

224. Ladies and gentlemen, Anderson Six Paak!

225. Hey, bruv.

226. Hey. Oh.

227. Bruv, is that my cantaloupe? Bruv?

228. What are you doing with my cantaloupe, bruv?

229. What the did you get into in England?

230. Ladies and gentlemen, Anderson Paakquiao!

231. I don't know.

232. I almost made this chair dirtier.