The Eric Andre Show 4x7

Directed by

Raymond Cruz as Self • Amber Rose as Self • Thundercat as Self

Actor Raymond Cruz and television personality Amber Rose are interviewed; Thundercat performs.

Request examples:

!req The Eric Andre Show 4x7 [02:32]
!req The Eric Andre Show 4x7 [The Eric Andre Show 4x7]
Syntax: !req EPISODE [quote or timestamp] (max. 8 square brackets)

For quotes, now you can request by index (e.g !req The Eric Andre Show 4x7 [10-11]; !req The Eric Andre Show 4x7 [20] [24]). Keep in mind, though, that index numbers might change at any time.
You can also generate a copy command with the quotes. Hover the desired subtitle and enter the amount of lines you want to copy.

Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. Ladies and gentlemen, it's "The Eric Andre Show"!

2. Oh,

3. Thank you, CrossFit.

4. - Ahh!

5. Ahh!

6. Ahh!

7. I love you.

8. You saved my life, you son of a bitch.

9. I mean that. You saved me.

10. I mean that — [ Thud! ]

11. Don't you dare put a finger on me, you asshole.

12. That's assault and I will press charges, okay?

13. I'll take your ass to Ferguson, mother

14. I'm eating this chick's poon in public, man.

15. You got to swap in for me, yo.

16. Dick in my

17. I'm in over my head with this fetish thing.

18. - I'm gonna be sick.

19. I'm sucking the disease out of her, man.

20. She's on the moon cycle.

21. It's like a goddamn gravy cloud in my mouth,

22. and I'm loving it, you know what I mean?

23. You know the McDonald's slogan?

24. Okay, ladies and gentlemen, um...

25. - Hey, bro. - Hmm?

26. I got to bounce out, man.

27. - Oh, you — - I got to leave.

28. - Oh, okay. - Yeah.

29. - All right, I'll s— - I'm-a have the robot fill in.

30. Sure. Yeah, that's cool.

31. I'll see you.

32. - Hey, robot. See ya. - Later, man.

33. I'm Hannibal.

34. Ladies and gentlemen, you know him from "Breaking Bad".

35. Please welcome Raymond Cruz!

36. Hey.

37. What's going on, my friends?

38. - How are you?

39. Hello, black robot.

40. Black robot.

41. Hi, Raymond Cruz.

42. That's Hannibal 9,000.

43. Oh, awesome. The latest technology.

44. Welcome to the show.

45. Was gonna say, isn't he, like, in the '70s?

46. Hey, check this out.

47. That's cool, right?

48. That's — yeah.

49. I heard that you passed on "Breaking Bad".

50. I did. I passed on "Breaking Bad" three times. Why?

51. Or as they say, "¿Porque?" - ¿Porque?

52. Because when I first read it, it was just, like,

53. I knew exactly what I wanted to do with it

54. and I didn't think they would let me do it.

55. You played a character named Tuco Salamanca. Yes.

56. To quote Salman Rushdie, "I think India's pretty cool."

57. Hey, do you mind if I put this interview

58. on Cruz control?

59. Sure.

60. Malfunction, malfunction!

61. - You talking, or the robot?

62. Touch my body, please.

63. Malfunction.

64. Malfunction! Processing.

65. Hey, I'm tired.

66. Your robot's going crazy, man.

67. That's the Hannibal 9,000.

68. Don't touch my body, please.

69. - How old are you? - I'm 51.

70. - I just turned 51. - I'm 69, dude.

71. You are not, bro! You wish.

72. Hey, my co-host is here.

73. What's up, brother?

74. East L.A. Boyle Heights in the house, biatch.

75. Yeah, whoo-whoo!

76. Boyle Heights, East L.A.

77. yeah.

78. Let's pump some energy into this interview.

79. Shit! Shit! Shit!

80. Shit! you!

81. you!

82. Piece of shit!

83. I'm a suicide bonger.

84. Leave the boys at home and the wife in the morgue.

85. It's dude's night. Buzz me.

86. You want to hit some Ranch?

87. No, not a chance.

88. - I'm sorry, dude. - It's okay.

89. I wasn't even talking to you this whole time.

90. I got virtual reality on the back of my sunglasses.

91. I'm in the middle of "Call of Duty",

92. and I have to say, sir, you're a Call of Cutie.

93. Yo!

94. You seem pretty simple.

95. You got the Trader Joe's newsletter?

96. Ooh!

97. You mind if I air-deejay in your personal space?

98. Sorry dude, I just deejayed Woodstock '99

99. like 4:20 minutes ago.

100. And when you get killed off in a movie...

101. Yes, it's an honor.

102. Oh, I thought that means, like,

103. the director didn't like your performance.

104. No, that's not what it means.

105. You want some of my food?

106. No, I'm good.

107. You want to hold this?

108. What is this?

109. Some kind of tuna sandwich.

110. Where you from, or, where'd — how'd you get your start?

111. Your desk just had a baby.

112. Oh, aww.

113. Baby desk.

114. Aw.

115. Isn't that sweet?

116. It's a boy. It's got wood.

117. Uh, I am not the father.

118. I'm just kidding. I am. I raped my desk.

119. And now I'm gonna rape my guest!

120. Come here!

121. "The Eric Andre Show" is filmed

122. in front of a live studio audience.

123. I dropped my doughnut.

124. Get over here, Basquiat, and hold this thing.

125. Oh!

126. I'm stuck!

127. Someone get some butter and butter me out!

128. I slipped delivering mail and I got stuck.

129. Someone get me out of this thing.

130. Help! Get it out of my face!

131. I'm Hannibal.

132. Ladies and gentlemen, Amber Rose!

133. Come here!

134. - Can I sit? Is that okay? - Yeah, sit.

135. Welcome to the show.

136. That's Hannibal 9,000.

137. I'm Hannibal.

138. What's going on with you, boo?

139. I have my SlutWalk coming up.

140. What? What's your phone number?

141. Um...

142. - You got a boyfriend? - No.

143. Well, you single and you ready to mingle?

144. You got to get washed, bro.

145. No, I'll take a bath in front of you.

146. I'll take a dump in front of you.

147. That's how comfortable I am.

148. Now you said on Twitter, "Ching chong, ching chong.

149. Go back to your country."

150. That is a lie.

151. I've never said that.

152. Why would you say something so controversial yet so brave?

153. You're insane, 'cause I would never write that.

154. - Should I ask you? - Sweat.

155. Can I shave male-pattern baldness into your hair?

156. It'll be like a fashion statement.

157. Um, I don't think so.

158. I speak Spanish.

159. - You got a new song out. - No, I don't sing.

160. It's like, shit, piss, you, shit,

161. and suck a shit out some piss."

162. That's not my song.

163. What's that say?

164. Okay, that's not — that's not my song.

165. How did you get your start?

166. I started — [ Sloop! ]

167. Hey, Amber.

168. It's me, Desky!

169. Yah! Ow!

170. Jesus Christ, this thing scared the goddamn shit out of me.

171. Ranch.

172. Ranch it up.

173. Holy shit, you're Ranch DuBois.

174. What's up, Ranch DuBois?

175. - Okay.

176. You want some energy pizza?

177. You got to gnosh your moth meat around this energy pizza.

178. Here comes the airplane.

179. [ Whap! ] It's a 9/11 in your mouth.

180. You want to get a tetanus shot later?

181. Ladies and gentlemen, here to have a good,

182. old-fashioned bass-off — Thunder Cat!

183. Versus Hannibal's robot!

184. Thunder Cat!

185. Hannibal's robot!

186. Thunder Cat!

187. Whatever was going on between you guys, enough's enough.

188. Families stay together.

189. Yeah. Shh.

190. Close together.

191. Eh — ugh.