The Boondocks 2x9

1. On August 29, 2005,

2. Hurricane Katrina

3. struck the Gulf Coast of the United States.

4. Several hours later,

5. residents of New Orleans' Lower Ninth Ward

6. reported hearing a loud explosion.

7. Then the flood came.

8. In the days and weeks that followed,

9. the nation watched and wondered:

10. how could it have all gone so wrong?

11. ♪ Good food, good food

12. Boy, see who that is.

13. Jericho Freeman.

14. Oh, lookie here, this is Cousin Jericho.

15. Man, I haven't talked to Cousin Jericho

16. in a long time.

17. Aren't you gonna answer it? Y'all don't know

18. that part of the family. They live down in Louisiana.

19. He was in New Orleans when that flood hit.

20. I'm telling you,

21. it was a crime how they treated those folks down there.

22. Took their land.

23. I heard they didn't even pay people's insurance.

24. And don't nobody even talk about it anymore.

25. You see how short people's memories are?

26. Man, I wish there was something I could do for 'em.

27. Boy, get the door.

28. Not just give 'em money, but actually do something.

29. It's Jericho Freeman. Tell him we're not here!

30. If there were just

31. anything at all that I could do, anything to help.

32. I'm a good man.

33. Hey, Robert. Guess who?

34. Hey, uh, Jericho, is it?

35. I don't want no handshake.

36. You get here and give Cousin Jericho a hug.

37. How are you, cous-boy? How long it been?

38. It been, what, four, five years?

39. More like 34 years. Could be 40.

40. Well, shoot. What the difference, huh?

41. We family, right, cousin? Ha, ha.

42. We family. We're cousins.

43. If you say so, second cousin.

44. Yeah, me and the gang

45. we just passing through ya'll neck of the woods—

46. Hi.

47. —and thought it would just be too rude of us

48. if we didn't stop by.

49. You know, we've been pretty much moving around

50. from place to place since, uh, you know.

51. You don't say. Well, great catching up.

52. Thanks for stopping by. Cheers.

53. Look, Robert, don't let the chrome rims fool you, okay?

54. The— The old Jericho Freeman clan, we ain't doing so great.

55. You know, we almost didn't make it up here.

56. A lot of folks didn't make it out at all.

57. Mm-hm.

58. Yes, we— We blessed to escape the deadly waters

59. of Hurricane Katrina with our lives.

60. And, uh, virtually nothing else.

61. Praise Jesus.

62. Well, you know, the important thing is everyone is okay.

63. Yeah, we lost everything.

64. Everything!

65. Yeah, material things can be replaced.

66. We don't have no place to go.

67. Mm-hm. Nothing like the open road. Seeing the country.

68. Trees and lakes and things.

69. And maybe a deer.

70. You know, it's, uh— It's hardest on the kids.

71. Yeah, well, you know, kids are strong.

72. You know, kids fight wars in some countries.

73. Nowhere for 'em to call home.

74. Well, home is where the heart is.

75. Yep. Yes, sir.

76. Phew.

77. Yeah, well, you know,

78. my diabetes been acting up again.

79. All right! All right! You can stay!

80. What?

81. Oh, Robert, would you do that for us?

82. Well, what a surprise.

83. Come on, y'all, he said it's cool.

84. Come on, y'all.

85. Oh, this is a pretty house.

86. Much better than the last place. Praise Jesus.

87. Robert, you remember the family, don't you?

88. This is my mama, Jericha, and my wife, Leona Ray.

89. Uh, our daughter Rolanda and her four kids,

90. named Bobby, Robby and Ricky.

91. Well, Whitley, Mitley and Missy.

92. And my son Nique and his pregnant girlfriend,

93. Diana Ross DuValle.

94. Mm. Hope you got air conditioning.

95. Ooh, this place is filthy.

96. Don't nobody clean up this house?

97. I hope you don't have bugs, because I can't stand bugs.

98. Locusts and stuff.

99. Shoot, I could have stayed in Louisiana for this.

100. Nana. Nana.

101. I'm going to get you.

102. Oh, man. Y'all up here doing it real big and shit, huh.

103. Yeah, I see y'all niggas, y'all living, huh.

104. Yeah, y'all got some real nice stuff up in here.

105. Wait. Oh, what's that, the PSP right there? Man.

106. You got more shit than a nigga need in here.

107. Damn. I bet these vases

108. cost y'all an arm and a leg, huh?

109. Yeah, I see y'all. Y'all like me, though:

110. I like having things too, you hear me?

111. I got to have it, you dig?

112. I'm a do-what-it-takes kind of nigga, man.

113. I get it how I live, and live how I get it, you feel me?

114. That's what real niggas do.

115. Granddad, I can't believe you let them niggas stay here.

116. That's messed up, Riley. That's family.

117. Family? I ain't never seen them niggas before in my life.

118. Far as I'm concerned, them niggas is the homeless.

119. They were left to drown. Yeah, that's real messed up.

120. Poor them. Why don't they take their homeless asses home?

121. They have nothing to go home to.

122. We let them niggas stay here,

123. we won't have nothing to go home to.

124. Everybody knows New Orleans niggas are grimy.

125. Yep. Thanks, wardy. That's my hat.

126. Both of you shut up. They'll stay.

127. Good for you, Granddad.

128. We can't even imagine what they've lost.

129. Please. I've seen that raggedy piece-of-shit house.

130. That nigga ain't lost that damn much.

131. Bob, I'm in Woodcrest,

132. the very small community with a very big heart.

133. Robert Freeman, a local resident here,

134. has decided to open his home

135. to Katrinian refugees.

136. Why is the news here? Well, I called the news

137. and told them what you did for us.

138. What the hell you do that for? Don't be modest. It's okay.

139. It's not okay. Now every damn Katrina victim for 100 miles

140. gonna be coming here. Hello.

141. Mr. Freeman, what makes a man

142. open his home to complete strangers?

143. Oh, no. These are not complete strangers. This is family.

144. Ah, yes, the human family. Oh, no, no, no.

145. This is my actual family. This is my second cousin.

146. Because we're all cousins and brothers and sisters

147. in the eyes of God? Well, not exactly. See—

148. What do you hope to get out of helping these people?

149. Not a damn thing.

150. Wow. So selfless. Bob.

151. Mama, Cousin Granddad kicked me.

152. Hey, we hear you was helping people from New Orleans.

153. We used to live right close to—

154. Well, I had a girlfriend in Katrina.

155. And I'm hungry— No.

156. Goddamn it, Jericho.

157. I told you this was going to happen.

158. Heh-heh. Price of fame.

159. I ask you to bless him, Lord,

160. and keep providing for him, Lord,

161. so that he may keep providing for us, Lord.

162. Jesus, amen. As we walk in your glory.

163. Get off of me, woman.

164. Whoo-ee. Boy, I hope you got some spray.

165. It smell like the circus in town up in there.

166. You— You gonna need a gas mask

167. and galoshes to go in there.

168. A HAZMAT suit.

169. Maybe something crawled up my ass and died, man.

170. Damn. These niggas don't do nothing

171. but watch TV and eat.

172. Man, stop complaining.

173. They're not gonna be here forever.

174. Y'all might as well stop making that Kool-Aid right now,

175. 'cause I don't even drink grape.

176. I only drink cherry and strawberry.

177. When y'all going to the store too?

178. I don't eat that shit y'all got up in here.

179. Y'all ain't got no butterbeans, no scrimps, no hogballs.

180. Y'all ain't got shit.

181. Hey, ho— Hold it there, little Missy.

182. That's Granddad's fresh-squeezed orange juice.

183. You do not want that.

184. Now, this here is the orange-flavored drink

185. for the guests. Mm-mm-mm.

186. Orange-Aid. With vitamin C.

187. It's okay. When we were trapped,

188. we didn't have anything to drink at all.

189. So I don't mind drinking the cheap stuff.

190. I'm just glad I have a place to sleep.

191. Do I still have to eat the cheap lunchmeat?

192. Yes.

193. You know, what hurt us was losing all that mattress money.

194. There was four or five accounts in there.

195. My retirement, the 401(k),

196. and the money for the record label I started in the basement.

197. You were in construction, right?

198. They're doing a lot of building in New Orleans right now.

199. I seen it on television. That's what I thought.

200. I heard Halliburton was hiring

201. right after the flood, so I showed up.

202. Name.

203. Are you serious?

204. Yo quiero Taco Bell.

205. Next.

206. My lamp.

207. The Lord will provide

208. another lamp. Praise Jesus.

209. Don't worry about it. Tally up a bill for it.

210. Uh, let me see here. Uh, thumbera.

211. This is a quick estimate, um,

212. factoring in the food, utilities—

213. Didn't have time to put the lamp in.

214. And all the toilet paper your mama using.

215. This is great. This is exactly what I need.

216. 'Cause I'm gonna make sure I pay you back every penny.

217. With interest. Well, thank you, Jericho.

218. Just as soon as my FEMA check arrives.

219. Ha, ha. Oh, shit, nigga.

220. Y'all got the 100-inch-screen TV too.

221. That digital cable right there?

222. Damn, cousin Rob got the system too.

223. Ooh, I bet this bitch got some knock, huh?

224. Damn, nigga.

225. Yeah, this bitch got some bass, boy.

226. Y'all got the new Xbox too. Oh, shit.

227. Hey, what you doing?

228. Oh! Let me serve this, nigga, you hear me?

229. You don't even want— Huey don't want none.

230. Boy, I'm telling y'all. Boy, y'all lucky we kin.

231. If I was a different type of nigga,

232. I'd tidy up out here with everything.

233. Clean up out this bitch

234. with nobody knowing nothing.

235. What happened to your insurance? Oh, I had insurance.

236. I had rain insurance, I had flood insurance.

237. But the damn insurance company

238. said I didn't have no wind insurance.

239. So I couldn't get no money.

240. Can you believe that? Wind insurance?

241. Ain't that the biggest ripoff you ever heard?

242. So I— I said to the guy, "What kind of shit is this?"

243. He said—

244. Hey there, darkies.

245. I heard there was some Katrinians in town.

246. So I brought out my old violin that only plays sad songs.

247. Boo-hoo-hoo, nigga.

248. It ain't the white man's fault you dumb niggas

249. don't know that there's wind in a hurricane.

250. Who is this? Long story.

251. Oh, but Mr. Charlie stayed one step ahead, don't he?

252. I can see 'em now:

253. "Guess what? I just saved a bunch of money

254. "on my insurance 'cause these dumb niggas didn't know

255. there was wind in a hurricane."

256. Oh, what? What, you got some more sad songs, huh?

257. That what you got for me?

258. Are you mad 'cause your Katrina welfare check

259. ain't showed up yet?

260. Hell, y'all niggas wasn't making

261. but $3 an hour before Katrina.

262. Now each of y'all want 300,000, huh.

263. Ain't that some bullshit? You. Come here.

264. Somebody call the police.

265. In the news today, violent crime is on the rise,

266. only a few days into the arrival

267. of Katrinian refugees to Woodcrest.

268. Police responded to an assault call on Timid Deer Lane.

269. Authorities don't yet know

270. if the violence was drug-related.

271. Y'all keep asking for help. I'll help.

272. I'll go down there and help blow up some more levees.

273. You better shut your mouth

274. before I beat your monkey ass up again.

275. A-ha! The proof is in the pudding.

276. Officer, did you hear that? Did you hear him confess?

277. I wanna press full charges.

278. Look, Jericho, you're Robert's family,

279. and we all know you guys have had it rough,

280. so we're gonna let it slide this time.

281. Oh, I— I get it. Okay, well, I don't have no cash on me now,

282. but when I get my FEMA check, you know,

283. I'll break you off a few stacks, playa. Heh-heh.

284. No, you don't have to bribe me. Ha. I'm just looking out.

285. No, no, no, no, no. I know how it go down.

286. You know, maybe we can work out something

287. where I look out for you,

288. you keep looking out for me, we look out for each other.

289. No! Stop trying to bribe me. I'm not for sale.

290. Hey, everything's for sale. Stop!

291. Man, I've just about had it.

292. I'm sorry the levees broke,

293. but if they don't get their black asses out of my house,

294. I'm 'a be broke. Great news, everybody.

295. Just got off the phone with FEMA

296. and we've got our final approval,

297. and the check is on the way.

298. Oh, praise the Lord.

299. And the best part is,

300. it's only gonna take three months.

301. Oh, Jesus. Jesus.

302. Jesus. Jesus.

303. Boy, that Flavor Flav crazy.

304. He did doo-doo right on the floor.

305. That's hilarious.

306. I'm telling you right now: they got to go.

307. Man, I don't know if I can take another three months.

308. See, I told you, but, no, niggas think they know everything.

309. What are we gonna do, Riley? Kick them out?

310. What's wrong with the street?

311. Hey. What happened? What the—? Robert.

312. What's wrong the TV? Something wrong with the cable.

313. If we all have to be here for the next three months,

314. we have to make some cutbacks. Oh, this nigga tripping.

315. Well, if it's too much to handle,

316. you can always leave.

317. What? We's Ninth Ward Negroes. Survivors.

318. We used to going without. Mm-hm.

319. Oops. There go the lights.

320. And so the gauntlet was thrown

321. in the battle

322. of the selfish versus the lazy.

323. Somebody pay the light bill.

324. Damn.

325. Son, I can't take

326. this kind of heat.

327. Hotter than the devil pissin'.

328. I'm just too old for this.

329. ♪ Sandwich, sandwich

330. It's good.

331. Now, this don't make no sense.

332. Ah.

333. Man, this is so wrong.

334. Hey, let's roll by the house and see if they left yet.

335. Huh?

336. How is the TV back on?

337. And the lights?

338. What's going on here? Hey.

339. And the best part is, this don't cost you a dime.

340. Tom. You didn't.

341. I sure did.

342. When your cousin told everyone in the neighborhood

343. how broke you were,

344. well, I decided it was time to do my part.

345. I want your family here in Woodcrest

346. for as long as they want to stay.

347. Ha-ha-ha. Yeah.

348. Hurricane.

349. So we gotta evacuate.

350. It'll be here any second. Hurry.

351. Get in your car and drive far, far away. Quick.

352. Let's get out of here quick. Y'all go first.

353. Get the baby, come on.

354. This is not a drill.

355. Dag, that was easy.

356. Hey. Hey, Robert.

357. When you come up,

358. use the special escape route I created.

359. What special escape route?

360. You can come down, little baby. Ain't no hurricane.

361. You don't want us here, do you?

362. It's okay. I don't really want to be here.

363. I wanna go home.

364. But Daddy says white people are building hotels there now.

365. So we have to stay here. Why here? Why me?

366. Because Daddy says

367. you're really, really, really, really rich.

368. Okay, it's just that— I'm not rich. At all.

369. I live on a fixed income.

370. I can't afford to support everybody.

371. Come, now, Robert. I told you I'm gonna take care of you

372. when the FEMA check comes.

373. Praise Jesus. What if the check doesn't come?

374. You need to think about getting a full-time job.

375. Full-time job?

376. Trying to get this check from FEMA is a full-time job.

377. A full-time job is a full-time job.

378. Waiting on FEMA is what got you into this mess

379. in the first place.

380. Oh, so we just lazy refugees, huh?

381. You know what? You boojie.

382. You don't remember struggle.

383. Tomorrow, either you get a job or get out.

384. Him too. Oh, man.

385. The women and kids can stay,

386. but you two lazy niggas got to go.

387. The only grown-ass man in this house not working

388. is gonna be me.

389. What's that?

390. Just something to help get you going.

391. I don't need your charity.

392. I'll pay you back when my FEMA check arrives.

393. Yeah, whatever. Beat it.

394. That's right, Bob.

395. It seems as though

396. this Good Samaritan's patience has run out.

397. News got an anonymous tip that Robert Freeman,

398. who had agreed to take the family in

399. until their FEMA relief check arrived,

400. is now kicking them out early. Brutal.

401. Who are y'all? What are y'all doing here?

402. Why are you throwing children out into the street?

403. Get the hell outta here. Get that camera out my face.

404. Is it true that you hate

405. poor black people?

406. Is it true? Did Bill Cosby put you up to this, Mr. Freeman?

407. I swear to you, Robert, I didn't call them.

408. I would never do something like that.

409. But I am so touched you decided to let us stay.

410. In Jesus' name we praise Jesus.

411. And don't you worry, when this FEMA check comes in,

412. I'm gonna remember this.

413. You know, as a matter of fact,

414. I might just build an addition to your house.

415. All on old Cousin Jericho. How about that, huh?

416. I mean, maybe an indoor pool.

417. Bowling alley, with Jacuzzis and silk sheets.

418. How about that, huh?

419. Conservatory and a small kitchenette—

420. Granddad had lost this battle,

421. but he had far from surrendered

422. the next three months of his life.

423. —big-screen TV sitting on top of a TV.

424. Robert, all the phones are dead.

425. Yeah. Can't afford it.

426. What if FEMA calls about the check?

427. Tough titty.

428. Uh, excuse me, I have to make a call.

429. You taking it too far now, Robert. Quit playing.

430. Hey! Hey! Hey, brother man, get off my phone.

431. I've had it. I'm about to give you a Category 5 ass whupping.

432. It's just been upgraded from a Category 3.

433. Get off me.

434. I want it. I want it.

435. Oh, shit. You keep talking, I'm gonna give you a Category 7.

436. Out. Robert, wait. Robert.

437. What would your momma say if she knew you was kicking out family?

438. She'd say, "Get them broke-ass niggas the fuck out."

439. Um, Jericho Freeman?

440. Yes?

441. This is it. They said it was gonna take three months,

442. but it took shorter time.

443. That's what I'm talking about.

444. Jesus, Lord and savior.

445. Believe that. Who makes all checks possible.

446. That right, that right. We thank you, Jesus.

447. Good times, baby.

448. "Having reviewed your records, we have determined

449. "that you have not submitted

450. Proof of Non-Residence Form 3595-768-5."

451. What kind of mess is this?

452. "Your check could

453. not be processed.

454. "Fill out the enclosed form and your check

455. "should be mailed out

456. in the next six months."

457. What mess is this? Y'all filled out wrong forms, or what?

458. Why do you hate us, Father? What have we done to you, Jesus?

459. I just don't know where we gonna go now.

460. Why don't you go back to New Orleans?

461. You been there your whole life.

462. Don't let 'em take your home away.

463. Not without a fight.

464. Mm-hm. You— You know, Huey, you right.

465. That's right. That's what we really want to do is go home.

466. Ain't that right, gang?

467. Yeah. The Lord is going to provide.

468. Then let's go. Come on, everybody, get your stuff.

469. So you really bought that "go home" shit?

470. Shit, we just got a check for 200 G's. Nigga, let's roll.

471. Jericho, look, I'm sorry.

472. Now, now. You ain't got to start all that apologizing.

473. We was both raised better.

474. I'm still gonna break you a piece of that FEMA check

475. when it show up. If you still want it.

476. Uh, don't worry. Are you sure, Robert?

477. The money gonna be here in no time.

478. I mean, it be in my pocket sooner than you think.

479. Aw, that's okay. Whoa, now, Robert,

480. gonna be a whole lot of money.

481. Uh, you know, you need it more than me.

482. I get it, I get it.

483. If you don't want none, I understand.

484. I understand completely.

485. I wouldn't want to give you something you don't want.

486. That right, nobody need

487. to give you something you don't need.

488. If you don't want it, I won't force you.

489. You just such a philanthropologist.

490. You're such a good giver.

491. You like a saint. You like Saint Robert.

492. There should be a little school.

493. Dressed up— Ask people to wear a uniform

494. and they come there and they pray to you every day.

495. I just tell you—

496. All right. Yeah, yeah. Thank you.

497. It wasn't much, but thank you.

498. I'll pray for you.

499. Thank you.

500. Just do it very, very far away.

501. We're going to New Orleans.

502. That's it, go back. Sayonara, you sorry niggas.

503. White man brought in the whole Gulf of Mexico

504. to wash y'all niggas away, but go on back.

505. You niggas ain't too good at taking a hint,

506. now, are ya? Go on, save New Orleans.

507. What they got down there worth saving? What, jazz?

508. Jazz music? I hate jazz music.

509. Sounds like a long car accident involving some cats.

510. Hey, y'all seen that movie When the Levees Broke?

511. I got a documentary called

512. When the Levees Gonna Break Again?

513. I'm gonna get me a dog. Name him Levee.

514. I'm gonna kick him every time it rain.