1. So...Copy !req
2. Couldn't help but notice
none of you rsvp'dCopy !req
3. To my murder mystery
dinner party.Copy !req
4. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
5. We were meaning
to do that.Copy !req
6. No, you weren't
because it was a week agoCopy !req
7. And nobody came!Copy !req
8. So, if you want to solve
the mystery of who stabbedCopy !req
9. Koothrappali in the back
with the weapon of indifference,Copy !req
10. It was all of you.Copy !req
11. I don't think that
qualifies as a mystery.Copy !req
12. We all knew what
we were doing.Copy !req
13. We're sorry, rajesh.Copy !req
14. Maybe we can do it next week.Copy !req
15. Whoa, whoa, we're
not that sorry.Copy !req
16. Don't worry, I can take a hint.Copy !req
17. No more murder mystery parties.Copy !req
18. Great.
Thank you.
Hallelujah.Copy !req
19. Because I've got something
even better planned.Copy !req
20. Aw!
Why?
Come on.Copy !req
21. Just hear me out.Copy !req
22. I'm going to make you guysCopy !req
23. A scavenger hunt
like they have at m.I.T.Copy !req
24. Oh...Copy !req
25. I loved those.Copy !req
26. I did them every year there.Copy !req
27. We did them at princeton, too.Copy !req
28. Oh, that's cute.Copy !req
29. Like it's a real college.Copy !req
30. That's amusing— I was going
to say that about m.I.T.,Copy !req
31. But it works for princeton, too.Copy !req
32. Scavenger hunts at harvard
were really tough.Copy !req
33. I always got stuck on
the first challenge—Copy !req
34. Trying to find someone
to be on a team with me.Copy !req
35. I guess that story's
more sad than funny.Copy !req
36. I love scavenger hunts.Copy !req
37. My friends and I had them
all the time.Copy !req
38. Oh, these are a
little different.Copy !req
39. There's a tradition
at elite universities.Copy !req
40. And princeton.Copy !req
41. A tradition of huntsCopy !req
42. Full of puzzles
that rely on logicCopy !req
43. And obscure knowledge, science.Copy !req
44. Oh, in ours we would just run
around town looking for a storeCopy !req
45. That would sell us beer.Copy !req
46. So, uh, who's in?Copy !req
47. I think it sounds fun.
Yeah, me, too.Copy !req
48. I'm in.
Let's do it.Copy !req
49. I'm sorry.
Are we really doing thisCopy !req
50. Or are we tricking
koothrappali againCopy !req
51. Like with the dinner party?Copy !req
52. What's all this?Copy !req
53. Oh, everything
I could possibly needCopy !req
54. To win the scavenger hunt.Copy !req
55. You really think he's gonna
send us to a bowling alley?Copy !req
56. Well, if he does,Copy !req
57. Do you know how filthy
those rental balls are?Copy !req
58. They might as well
stand on the cornerCopy !req
59. And give away free rectal exams.Copy !req
60. Okay, everybody.Copy !req
61. Who's ready for a...Copy !req
62. Scavenger
Hunt?Copy !req
63. Somewhere...Copy !req
64. In the city of pasadena,Copy !req
65. I've hiddenCopy !req
66. A golden coin.Copy !req
67. Oh!Copy !req
68. You will be faced with a totalCopy !req
69. Of ten puzzles!Copy !req
70. Each p...Copy !req
71. Each...Copy !req
72. Each puzzle will lead youCopy !req
73. To the location of the next.Copy !req
74. The last of whichCopy !req
75. Will lead you to the coin.Copy !req
76. The first team that finds it...Copy !req
77. Wins!Copy !req
78. He is a born showman.Copy !req
79. Any questions?Copy !req
80. Yes, to be fair, do peopleCopy !req
81. Who went to princeton
get a head start?Copy !req
82. That's not funny.Copy !req
83. Oh, it actually is
if you get the joke.Copy !req
84. It's based on the premiseCopy !req
85. That princeton isn't
a very good school.Copy !req
86. Ha-ha.Copy !req
87. Oh, see? Now he gets it.Copy !req
88. Okay, guys, go aheadCopy !req
89. And divide yourselves
into teams of two.Copy !req
90. Should we just do couples?Copy !req
91. Couples sounds great.Copy !req
92. Or we could mix things up.Copy !req
93. Maybe pick names out of a hat.Copy !req
94. Whatever.Copy !req
95. Whoa, whoa...Copy !req
96. Whoa.Copy !req
97. Why don't you just admitCopy !req
98. You don't want to be
on a team with me.Copy !req
99. I just said,
"couples sound great."Copy !req
100. Mm-hmm, yeah, you don't
think I'm smart enough.Copy !req
101. You think I'm gonna
be a liability.Copy !req
102. Even though I
totally just usedCopy !req
103. The word "liability"
correctlyCopy !req
104. In a sentence.Copy !req
105. Yeah.Copy !req
106. All right,
let's-let's do couples.Copy !req
107. I want to.Copy !req
108. No, no, no.Copy !req
109. Let's mix things up.Copy !req
110. I choose sheldon,
and we're gonna kick your ass!Copy !req
111. Yeah... Really?Copy !req
112. The only time I'm ever
picked first for a teamCopy !req
113. And I'm stuck
with the liability?Copy !req
114. Stop that.
Penny is not a liability.Copy !req
115. Thank you. Do you want
to be on my team?Copy !req
116. Maybe we pick names
out of a hat.Copy !req
117. All right, hurry up
and close the doorCopy !req
118. So they can't hear us.Copy !req
119. Would you stop pouting?Copy !req
120. So, you picked my name.Copy !req
121. Get over it.Copy !req
122. Yes, and do you know
what the odds areCopy !req
123. I'd pick your name?Copy !req
124. No.Copy !req
125. It's not hard— one in five.Copy !req
126. Now you know why I'm pouting.Copy !req
127. Koothrappali
(over walkie-
All right, teams.Copy !req
128. Get ready to open
your first puzzle.Copy !req
129. Go!Copy !req
130. Do you see what I did?Copy !req
131. The first puzzle is a puzzle!Copy !req
132. Oh, my god,
how adorable is that?Copy !req
133. I wish I had a friend like me.Copy !req
134. What are you doing?Copy !req
135. You have to start
with the edges.Copy !req
136. Well, there's
no right way, sheldon.Copy !req
137. I already found
a few pieces that fit.Copy !req
138. Yeah, well, take them apart
and start with the edges.Copy !req
139. And stop wasting time.Copy !req
140. Wow, you're really
good at puzzles.Copy !req
141. I did them all
the time as a kid.Copy !req
142. As my mom used to say,Copy !req
143. "when you're doing a puzzle,Copy !req
144. It's like having a
thousand friends."Copy !req
145. She was full of fun
lies like that.Copy !req
146. If it makes you feel
any better,Copy !req
147. My mom's just full
of pound cake.Copy !req
148. I'm sorry you got
stuck with me.Copy !req
149. I bet you wanted to
be with bernadette.Copy !req
150. Have you ever played
a game with bernadette?Copy !req
151. No.Copy !req
152. Have you ever goneCopy !req
153. Into a steel cage
with a wolverine?Copy !req
154. Faster, faster, faster!Copy !req
155. Do you not know that word?Copy !req
156. It means "more fast"!Copy !req
157. Stop yelling at me.Copy !req
158. Hey!Copy !req
159. You'll know when
I'm yelling at you.Copy !req
160. Ooh, ooh, it's
the comic book store!Copy !req
161. All right, come on.Copy !req
162. That's where we have to go.Copy !req
163. But we haven't
finished the puzzle.Copy !req
164. Well, it-it doesn't matter!Copy !req
165. We know the answer!Copy !req
166. Come on.
You think you know the answer.Copy !req
167. But it could be a trick.Copy !req
168. What if when
the puzzle's complete,Copy !req
169. There's a sign
in the window that says,Copy !req
170. "go to the train store"?Copy !req
171. Okay, it's not gonna say that.Copy !req
172. Well, I hope you're wrong.Copy !req
173. I really want to go
to the train store.Copy !req
174. It's the comic book store.Copy !req
175. Let's go!Copy !req
176. Come on, numb nuts,
it's the comic book store!Copy !req
177. It's the comic book store,
it's the comic book store,Copy !req
178. It's the comic book store!Copy !req
179. It's the comic book store.Copy !req
180. Do you think
penny's mad at me?Copy !req
181. Because you're
in the right laneCopy !req
182. Behind a bus
and you won't go around it?Copy !req
183. I'm sure
she finds it charming.Copy !req
184. No, because I didn't
want her on my team.Copy !req
185. I'm starting to think
she dodged a bullet.Copy !req
186. The slowest bullet in the world.Copy !req
187. Geez, I never realized
you were so competitive.Copy !req
188. Yeah, I know.Copy !req
189. It's-it's probably
because I grew upCopy !req
190. With five brothers and sistersCopy !req
191. So I had to fight for every...Copy !req
192. Oh, my god, you did not
just slow down for a bird!Copy !req
193. You know they fly, right?Copy !req
194. I think this is
the first time we've everCopy !req
195. Actually been alone together.Copy !req
196. Huh, I guess
you're right.Copy !req
197. Wonder why that is?Copy !req
198. Well, off the top of my head,
I'd say we don't have a lotCopy !req
199. In common except for the people
we're involved with.Copy !req
200. Plus, when we first met,
penny warned me neverCopy !req
201. To get into a car
alone with you.Copy !req
202. Yeah.Copy !req
203. You know, I bet you and I have
more in common than we think.Copy !req
204. Such as?Copy !req
205. I don't know.Copy !req
206. Tell me some things you like.Copy !req
207. Uh, let's see.Copy !req
208. I like harps,
little house on the prairie,Copy !req
209. Medieval poetry,
medieval literature...Copy !req
210. Hey, how about some music?Copy !req
211. Great.Copy !req
212. Sheldon never lets me
listen to music in the car.Copy !req
213. He doesn't want to be mistaken
for a gang member.Copy !req
214. Find something you like.Copy !req
215. Beatles, boring.Copy !req
216. Eminem, scary.Copy !req
217. Weird al?Copy !req
218. How old are you?Copy !req
219. Neil diamond?Copy !req
220. Yeah, I love neil diamond.Copy !req
221. I love neil diamond.Copy !req
222. ♪ sweet carolineCopy !req
223. Oh, hey, thanks
for letting me useCopy !req
224. The comic book store
as part of the scavenger hunt.Copy !req
225. Oh, my pleasure.Copy !req
226. Always happy to help out
with fun thingsCopy !req
227. That I wasn't invited
to be a part of.Copy !req
228. Oh, congratulations.Copy !req
229. You're the first team
to arrive.Copy !req
230. Yes! It's not a ruse
to make fun of me.Copy !req
231. It's a real game
and I'm winning it!Copy !req
232. Your next puzzle is a riddle.Copy !req
233. And who better
to give it to youCopy !req
234. Than the riddler?Copy !req
235. Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go,Copy !req
236. Go, go, go, go,
go, go, go!Copy !req
237. How am I faster than you?Copy !req
238. I'm wearing heels and I stopped
to take a phone call.Copy !req
239. I have asthma.Copy !req
240. Back off!Copy !req
241. "riddle me this.Copy !req
242. "arrah, arrah, and gather round,Copy !req
243. "the work of this hero
is legion-bound.Copy !req
244. "he multiplies n
by the number of he,Copy !req
245. And in this room
the thing you'll see."Copy !req
246. Good riddle, huh?
Yeah.Copy !req
247. So when you guys
plan fun activities,Copy !req
248. Does my name even...Copy !req
249. Come up, or...?Copy !req
250. I invited you to my
murder mystery party.Copy !req
251. No, you didn't.Copy !req
252. Oh.Copy !req
253. We're the last ones here,
hurry up!Copy !req
254. It is a marathon,
not a sprint.Copy !req
255. People run
in a marathon!Copy !req
256. Not with a bowling ball
on their back.Copy !req
257. Hey, penny, I just
wanted to say good luck,Copy !req
258. And I hope there's
no hard feelings.Copy !req
259. Hey, romeo!Copy !req
260. Repair your relationship
on your own time.Copy !req
261. Relax, it's
a hard puzzle.Copy !req
262. It's gonna take
a while to solve.Copy !req
263. "riddle me this..."
got it.Copy !req
264. Hey, princeton,
look at that,Copy !req
265. Team community college
night school is in the lead.Copy !req
266. I thought we were
the lightning sharks.Copy !req
267. Hey, you know what
this could mean...Copy !req
268. Oh, oh, that's good.Copy !req
269. Then this
would be...Copy !req
270. That's it.Copy !req
271. To the neil mobile!Copy !req
272. I knew it,
we're gonna lose!Copy !req
273. Wait, I got it.
I got it!Copy !req
274. Congratulations,
you got it last.Copy !req
275. You're really mean,
you know that?Copy !req
276. So no one's gonna buy anything.Copy !req
277. Aha!Copy !req
278. Okay...Copy !req
279. Let's see.Copy !req
280. "to continue
on your quest,Copy !req
281. Leave no stone unturned."Copy !req
282. Ooh.Copy !req
283. The next clue
must be hiddenCopy !req
284. Under one of
these rocks.Copy !req
285. Oh. Okay.Copy !req
286. Sheldon,
I-I've got to ask.Copy !req
287. How did you figure out
that it was the geology lab?Copy !req
288. Oh, simple.Copy !req
289. The "arrah, arrah" in the
riddle meant jan arrah,Copy !req
290. A member of
the legion of superheroes,Copy !req
291. Known as element lad.Copy !req
292. And then
the word "he,"Copy !req
293. It wasn't
the masculine pronoun,Copy !req
294. But rather, "h-e,"Copy !req
295. The abbreviation for helium.Copy !req
296. See where I'm going with this?Copy !req
297. Yes.Copy !req
298. Nice try.Copy !req
299. Now, element
lad's abilityCopy !req
300. Is the power to transmute
chemical elements.Copy !req
301. Helium has
an atomic number of two.Copy !req
302. If you multiply that
by the atomic number of "n"--Copy !req
303. Nitrogen—Copy !req
304. You get 14, which is
the atomic number of...?Copy !req
305. I'm just funnin' you,
silicon.Copy !req
306. And that is
the most common elementCopy !req
307. In the earth's
surface.Copy !req
308. So that narrowed it downCopy !req
309. To the geology lab
or the chemistry lab.Copy !req
310. Wow.Copy !req
311. I can drink a beer underwater.Copy !req
312. And I'm sure
your parents are proud.Copy !req
313. Now, finally,Copy !req
314. The line "in this room
the thing you'll see"Copy !req
315. Was an obvious referenceCopy !req
316. To fantastic four member
the thing,Copy !req
317. Who's made entirely of...Copy !req
318. Shut up.Copy !req
319. I solved it.Copy !req
320. Those are map
coordinates.Copy !req
321. Got 'em.
Let's go.Copy !req
322. Well, wait.Copy !req
323. D-don't you want to know
how I figured it out?Copy !req
324. No one likes
a know-it-all, penny.Copy !req
325. Um, I'm okay with you
driving my car.Copy !req
326. I'm not okay
with you flying my car.Copy !req
327. Don't sweat it, my dad's a cop.
He can fix things.Copy !req
328. Uh-huh.Copy !req
329. Like death?Copy !req
330. Your kid may be
an honor studentCopy !req
331. But you're a moron!Copy !req
332. Penny's not answering my texts.Copy !req
333. Who cares?
Focus on the game.Copy !req
334. This stupid game is why
she's mad in the first place.Copy !req
335. I'm telling her I'm quitting.Copy !req
336. No!Copy !req
337. Quitting would be
the worst thingCopy !req
338. For your relationship.Copy !req
339. Why?Copy !req
340. Because it would
make you seem likeCopy !req
341. Something she already
thinks you are.Copy !req
342. What does she think I am?Copy !req
343. How do I put this?Copy !req
344. She's been known
to call you a nameCopy !req
345. That usually applies
to a lady part.Copy !req
346. Or a cat.Copy !req
347. Or a willow.Copy !req
348. I can't believe
she would say that about me.Copy !req
349. If you're gonna
cry about itCopy !req
350. There's tissues
in my purse.Copy !req
351. Unless you got some in yours.Copy !req
352. Big willow.Copy !req
353. Okay...
Another 30 feet.Copy !req
354. Okay.Copy !req
355. Oh.Copy !req
356. It's a bowling
alley.Copy !req
357. Yes.Copy !req
358. Yes!Copy !req
359. My brain is better
than everybody's!Copy !req
360. Call me a lady part.Copy !req
361. We'll see about that.Copy !req
362. Can you reach the clue?Copy !req
363. Almost.Copy !req
364. Hurry, sheldon and pennyCopy !req
365. Were right behind us
in the bowling alley.Copy !req
366. Got it!Copy !req
367. Great,
climb back up.Copy !req
368. Come on!Copy !req
369. Yeah, penny might
be onto something.Copy !req
370. To the planetarium!Copy !req
371. Let's go!Copy !req
372. To the tar pits!Copy !req
373. Let's go!Copy !req
374. There's a neil diamond
concert next month!Copy !req
375. Let's go!Copy !req
376. Three bags,
no one's opened 'em.Copy !req
377. We're the first ones here!Copy !req
378. It's dirty laundry.
You're up.
What? You...Copy !req
379. Why me?Copy !req
380. Because you've
been trainingCopy !req
381. For this
your whole life.Copy !req
382. You live in a pile
of dirty laundry.Copy !req
383. They're here first.Copy !req
384. This is because you made me slow
down for that blind guy.Copy !req
385. Okay, the clue
must be in the bag.Copy !req
386. The clue must be
in the bag.Copy !req
387. What's... It's just
a bunch of pants.Copy !req
388. It's just
a bunch of pants.Copy !req
389. You know,
I'm surprisedCopy !req
390. You want to copy
my answersCopy !req
391. Since I'm not even smart
enough to be on your team.Copy !req
392. Well, why would
you want to be
on someone's teamCopy !req
393. Who you like
to call a...Copy !req
394. I can't even say it
in front of sheldon.Copy !req
395. What are you talking about?Copy !req
396. You know exactly what
I'm talking about.Copy !req
397. No, she doesn't.Copy !req
398. I just made
that up.Copy !req
399. Why would you do that?Copy !req
400. Because you were about
to quit like a big—Copy !req
401. Sheldon, cover your ears.Copy !req
402. I'm not a child.Copy !req
403. I know the word "ninny."Copy !req
404. Yeah, well, you
should have quitCopy !req
405. 'cause I'm still
gonna beat your ass.Copy !req
406. Wish I had a man
like her on my team.Copy !req
407. Hey, I-I am every bitCopy !req
408. As much of
a man as penny.Copy !req
409. Now, let's do this!Copy !req
410. Wait, it's not all pants,
there's one shirt.Copy !req
411. Oh.Copy !req
412. hey, that's my shirt.Copy !req
413. This one is, too.
No, no,
that's not mine.Copy !req
414. That has a big
spot on it.Copy !req
415. But wait.Copy !req
416. So does this one.Copy !req
417. Maybe the spot's
the clue.Copy !req
418. "sheldon's spot."Copy !req
419. The coin is in your spot!Copy !req
420. Oh, that's clever.Copy !req
421. Hurry!Copy !req
422. Be there in a minute.Copy !req
423. I just have to pre-soak these!Copy !req
424. Stop her, leonard!
Stop her!Copy !req
425. Well, where the
hell's the coin?Copy !req
426. Wasn't the answer
sheldon's spot?Copy !req
427. Oh, yes, leonard.Copy !req
428. Yes, it was.Copy !req
429. Then where's the coin?Copy !req
430. Yes, exactly.Copy !req
431. Where is the coin?Copy !req
432. Why don't you look
in your pockets?Copy !req
433. I slipped them in there
earlier today.Copy !req
434. I don't get it.Copy !req
435. Don't you see?Copy !req
436. When we're all
having fun together,Copy !req
437. We're already winners.Copy !req
438. Oh, look.Copy !req
439. See?Copy !req
440. Even I'm a winner.Copy !req
441. Are you
kidding me?Copy !req
442. That is the stupidest
thing I've ever heard.Copy !req
443. You suck so hard.Copy !req
444. Well, I thought...Copy !req
445. Come on,
I didn't want anyoneCopy !req
446. To feel bad at the end
of the game.Copy !req
447. And some of those puzzles
were really hardCopy !req
448. And I didn't know
who was gonna get penny.Copy !req
449. Run.Copy !req
450. Okay, okay,
that-that came out wrong,Copy !req
451. But you have to admit,Copy !req
452. You all had a wonderful time.Copy !req
453. Run to india.Copy !req
454. I just wanted to do
something beautiful!Copy !req
455. Hey, look.Copy !req
456. I won.Copy !req
457. Captioning sponsored by
cbs, warner bros. TelevisionCopy !req
458. And toyota.Copy !req