1. - The Beverly Hillbillies.Copy !req
2. - You know something, Granny?Copy !req
3. I feel sorry for Mr. Drysdale.Copy !req
4. Why, that poor man
might as well be single,Copy !req
5. with his wife gone all the time.Copy !req
6. - He's a lost soul, Jed.Copy !req
7. I was glad you invited him
over for supper last night,Copy !req
8. but even my cooking didn't cheer him up.Copy !req
9. - Yeah, I noticed.Copy !req
10. He hardly touched his plate
of grits and possum belly.Copy !req
11. - Even when I spooned
on some gopher gravy.Copy !req
12. - Yeah, he didn't perk
up 'til after supper,Copy !req
13. and Pearl started a playin' and singin'.Copy !req
14. - Don't tell me he
liked Pearl's bellerin'.Copy !req
15. - That wasn't bellerin',
that was yodelin'.Copy !req
16. - Well, it curdled the milk
clean out to the kitchen.Copy !req
17. Oh, I've throwed shoes at tomcatsCopy !req
18. that made purdier music than Pearl.Copy !req
19. - I sure wish you two women
would get along together.Copy !req
20. - We ain't gonna get along togetherCopy !req
21. until she learns to
stay out of my kitchen.Copy !req
22. I bet she's in there right now,Copy !req
23. sticking her long nose
into my pots and pans.Copy !req
24. By-dingy.Copy !req
25. If she is!Copy !req
26. - Now, Granny, you just cool down.Copy !req
27. - Pa?Copy !req
28. - Elly May, Jethrine,Copy !req
29. what in the world you been doing?Copy !req
30. - Playing ball with some
fellas down in the pasture.Copy !req
31. - What's that thing?Copy !req
32. - Well, this here's what
you call a football helmet.Copy !req
33. - Elly May, I'm purt near positiveCopy !req
34. that a ball gown ain't
for playing ball in.Copy !req
35. - Well, the fellas seemed to like it,Copy !req
36. didn't they, Jethrine?Copy !req
37. - They sure do, Uncle Jed.Copy !req
38. They's waitin' for us right nowCopy !req
39. to get some money to buy a new football.Copy !req
40. - What happened to that one?Copy !req
41. - Well, Jethrine was
gonna throw me a pass-Copy !req
42. - But I grabbed it too hard and it busted.Copy !req
43. - I ain't gonna give you
the money for another one.Copy !req
44. - Ah, heck.Copy !req
45. - Well, that's all right, Jethrine.Copy !req
46. Remember, they said they'd be just as gladCopy !req
47. to play with us without a football.Copy !req
48. Come on!Copy !req
49. - I warned you to stay out of my kitchen!Copy !req
50. - Oh Jethro, save your ma!Copy !req
51. Protect me from that wild woman!Copy !req
52. - Hold her, Jethro, so I can paddle her!Copy !req
53. - Granny, a thing like that could smart.Copy !req
54. - I'll show ya'!Copy !req
55. Put me down, you big overgrown.Copy !req
56. Put me down!
- Hey, what's going on here?Copy !req
57. Jethro, put your granny down.Copy !req
58. - Put me down!
- She was fixing to whomp ma.Copy !req
59. - I'll whomp her.Copy !req
60. - Here, ma, now it's a fair fight.Copy !req
61. - Oh, nobody gonna whomp nobody.Copy !req
62. - Well, then, you tell PearlCopy !req
63. the next time she sticks her noseCopy !req
64. in one of my pots, I'm gonna cook it.Copy !req
65. - It is my bond and duty as a motherCopy !req
66. to supervise the vittles
of my growing children.Copy !req
67. - Don't tell me they is still growing.Copy !req
68. - The Clampett side of the familyCopy !req
69. has always been big,
strong, strapping folks.Copy !req
70. It's your family that
brought in the runts.Copy !req
71. - Who you callin' a runt?Copy !req
72. - I think she meant you, Granny.Copy !req
73. - Well, he's about as helpfulCopy !req
74. as a high wind in a prairie fire.Copy !req
75. Come on, Pearl, you and
me's gonna have a talk.Copy !req
76. Jethro, you stay here and
help your granny cool down.Copy !req
77. - Okay, Uncle Jed.Copy !req
78. Now Granny, would you rather I held youCopy !req
79. under the faucet here to cool off,Copy !req
80. or took you out to the
cement pond and dunked ya?Copy !req
81. - Try either one, and I'll bash youCopy !req
82. flatter than a gander's arch.Copy !req
83. (pot clangs)
There.Copy !req
84. - Now, Pearl-Copy !req
85. - Cousin Jed, I know just
what you're gonna say.Copy !req
86. You're gonna say, "Pearl,
stay out of the kitchen."Copy !req
87. You're gonna say,
"That's Granny's kitchen,Copy !req
88. and it's none of your business."Copy !req
89. You're gonna say,Copy !req
90. "Stay in your room where you belong."Copy !req
91. That's what you're gonna say, ain't it?Copy !req
92. - Ain't nothing like it at all.Copy !req
93. What I was gonna say was,Copy !req
94. it seems to me that a handsome widow-womanCopy !req
95. in the prime of lifeCopy !req
96. ought not to be hiding herselfCopy !req
97. in the back part of the house,Copy !req
98. working over steamin' pots and pans,Copy !req
99. and dippin' her piani playing fingersCopy !req
100. into soapy water,Copy !req
101. and hoarsenin' up her
beautiful singin' voiceCopy !req
102. yellin' at Granny.Copy !req
103. That's what I was gonna say.Copy !req
104. - Praise be.Copy !req
105. Why don't I keep my big
mouth shut and just listen?Copy !req
106. - You know, Pearl,Copy !req
107. you got the gift of makin' music.Copy !req
108. And I reckon there ain't nothingCopy !req
109. these city fellas likes better than that.Copy !req
110. - Really, Jed?Copy !req
111. - Yeah, remember last night,
when Mr. Drysdale was here,Copy !req
112. and you was playin' and
singin' and yodelin' for him?Copy !req
113. - Yeah.Copy !req
114. - You brung that poor, lonesome manCopy !req
115. a lot of happiness.Copy !req
116. - Jed, you ain't a-greenin' me, are ya?Copy !req
117. - I give you my word.Copy !req
118. Remember that song you sung,Copy !req
119. "The Flowers that Bloom
in the Spring Tra-la?"Copy !req
120. - Yeah.Copy !req
121. - Well, you had Mr. Drysdale
believin' it was spring.Copy !req
122. - No.
- Yeah.Copy !req
123. While you was still singin',Copy !req
124. he went and flung open the window,Copy !req
125. stuck his head out,Copy !req
126. and started takin' deep breaths,Copy !req
127. just like he was really
smellin' them flowers.Copy !req
128. - Do you reckon he liked my yodelin'?Copy !req
129. - Pearl, he like to went wild.Copy !req
130. I reckon them city fellasCopy !req
131. don't get a chance to hear much yodelin',Copy !req
132. 'cause when you throwed your
head back and cut loose,Copy !req
133. it really grabbed a hold of him.Copy !req
134. - It did?Copy !req
135. - He gripped the arms of his chairCopy !req
136. 'til his knuckles turned white.Copy !req
137. Then he commenced to rocking
back and forth and moanin'Copy !req
138. like he was under some kind of a spell.Copy !req
139. And his eyes commenced
to circlin' in his head,Copy !req
140. and real tears run down his cheeks.Copy !req
141. Before you got done, he
was limp as a dishrag.Copy !req
142. I had to help him to the door.Copy !req
143. - Uncle Jed,Copy !req
144. I can't seem to do nothing
to cool Granny off.Copy !req
145. - Ain't no need to, Jethro.Copy !req
146. Your pretty, young, piani playin' ma,Copy !req
147. has decided not to hide herself awayCopy !req
148. out in the kitchen.Copy !req
149. - That's a good idea, Ma,Copy !req
150. 'cause Granny, she'd find ya and whomp ya.Copy !req
151. - Well, we'll see about that.Copy !req
152. - Now, Pearl, will you stay out hereCopy !req
153. and practice playin' and
singin' and yodelin'?Copy !req
154. I'll take care of Granny.Copy !req
155. - I wonder if I shoulda told Uncle JedCopy !req
156. that Granny's waitin' behind
the door with a skilletCopy !req
157. to whomp the first person that sets footCopy !req
158. in her kitchen.Copy !req
159. Yeah, I reckon I shoulda.Copy !req
160. - Oh!Copy !req
161. Oh, Jed, I'm sorry.Copy !req
162. I thought it was Pearl a-comin' in.Copy !req
163. - Granny, you done shortened me.Copy !req
164. - I'll make a poultice for
your head right away now, Jed.Copy !req
165. Right away.Copy !req
166. - I'm telling you, Granny,Copy !req
167. you don't have to worry no more aboutCopy !req
168. Pearl coming in your kitchen.Copy !req
169. She's gonna be spending her timeCopy !req
170. getting herself a husband
with her singin' and yodelin'.Copy !req
171. - Jed, it ain't legalCopy !req
172. to torture a man into marryin' ya.Copy !req
173. - You just don't realize the powerCopy !req
174. of Pearl's yodelin's got over a man.Copy !req
175. Last night, Mr. Drysdale
like to went wild.Copy !req
176. - Purt near drove me crazy, too.Copy !req
177. - He loved it, Granny.Copy !req
178. I bet you he's got that yodelin'Copy !req
179. ringin' in his ears right now.Copy !req
180. - I can still hear it.Copy !req
181. That unearthly screeching.Copy !req
182. - Now, chief, surely, it wasn't that bad.Copy !req
183. - Well, I can best describe itCopy !req
184. as the sound a woman might makeCopy !req
185. if she were having her appendix removedCopy !req
186. without an anesthetic.Copy !req
187. - Milburn, darling.Copy !req
188. - Margaret.Copy !req
189. I'm so glad to have you back, dear.Copy !req
190. - A becoming hat, dear, is it new?Copy !req
191. - Huh? Oh. (chuckles)Copy !req
192. - Welcome home, Mrs. Drysdale.Copy !req
193. - Thank you.Copy !req
194. Milburn, I have the most marvelous news.Copy !req
195. I'm going to a health farm in Arizona.Copy !req
196. - What?Copy !req
197. - Some women were talking
about it on the plane.Copy !req
198. It's terribly chic, quite expensive,Copy !req
199. and you don't need any willpower.Copy !req
200. They just force you to be healthy.Copy !req
201. The doctors are all deliciously mean.Copy !req
202. - But, Margaret, you are healthy.Copy !req
203. Every doctor in the United
States says you're healthy.Copy !req
204. - But, dear, this is different.Copy !req
205. They reduce you, as well.Copy !req
206. - Margaret, if you want to lose weight,Copy !req
207. just stay home and we'll have dinnerCopy !req
208. at the Clampett's every night.Copy !req
209. Now, you can't eat the food,Copy !req
210. but you won't leave hungry,Copy !req
211. because cousin Pearl will
yodel your appetite away.Copy !req
212. - But, Milburn,Copy !req
213. it's so fashionable to
go to a health farm.Copy !req
214. - Oh, Margaret, please stay homeCopy !req
215. and run the place for a while.Copy !req
216. - You have plenty of servants.Copy !req
217. - Yes, but we have no
one to manage the place.Copy !req
218. And with both of us away most of the time,Copy !req
219. the servants are asleep on the job.Copy !req
220. - Well, just hire a good,
efficient housekeeper.Copy !req
221. - Oh yes, just try and find one.Copy !req
222. Oh, Margaret, please stay home.Copy !req
223. - All right, if that's the way you feel.Copy !req
224. Miss Hathaway!Copy !req
225. I'll stay home, just as you wish.Copy !req
226. - That's my darling.Copy !req
227. - Yes, Mrs. Drysdale?Copy !req
228. - Telephone the pharmacyCopy !req
229. and have all my prescriptions refilled.Copy !req
230. And call my psychiatrist, my neurologist,Copy !req
231. my internist, and my osteopathCopy !req
232. and have them come over.Copy !req
233. Oh, and I'll need nurses around the clock.Copy !req
234. I just know the servant problem'sCopy !req
235. going to bring on a nervous breakdown.Copy !req
236. - Oh, all right, all right,
go to the health farm.Copy !req
237. - No, no.Copy !req
238. My place is at home.Copy !req
239. - Please go to the health farm.Copy !req
240. - All right, if you're
sure that's what you want.Copy !req
241. - Oh, I want it, I want it, I want it.Copy !req
242. - Milburn, I promise to
come back a new woman.Copy !req
243. Goodbye.Copy !req
244. Just think, Milburn,Copy !req
245. you'll have a young, glamorous wife,Copy !req
246. slim, trim and beautiful.Copy !req
247. - All right, start looking
for a new housekeeper.Copy !req
248. - Won't do any good, chief,
we've been through this.Copy !req
249. Mr. Drysdale's office.Copy !req
250. Who's calling, please?Copy !req
251. - Tell him it's a surprise.Copy !req
252. - A surprise?Copy !req
253. - That's what she says.Copy !req
254. - Milburn Drysdale speaking.Copy !req
255. - What in the world is that?Copy !req
256. - That is Pearl Bodine yodeling.Copy !req
257. Now, when she comes up for air,Copy !req
258. tell her I was drafted.Copy !req
259. - Chief, she might be the answerCopy !req
260. to your housekeeping problem.Copy !req
261. - What?
- Be nice to her.Copy !req
262. I'll explain.
- Hello, hello?Copy !req
263. - Hello, Mrs. Bodine.Copy !req
264. How nice to hear your voice again.Copy !req
265. You were saying?Copy !req
266. - Mr. Clampett saysCopy !req
267. that Pearl is such an
industrious housekeeper,Copy !req
268. that Granny is jealous.Copy !req
269. She might take over your house and hers,Copy !req
270. and solve both your problems.Copy !req
271. - What about that yodeling?Copy !req
272. - You won't be there.Copy !req
273. And I defy any servantsCopy !req
274. to sleep on the job with Pearl around.Copy !req
275. - Hello!Copy !req
276. - Hello, Mrs. Bodine.Copy !req
277. I wonder if I might come over
and talk to you for a while.Copy !req
278. - Oh, what, talk to me?Copy !req
279. Well, what about?Copy !req
280. - Well, I think
you may be just the womanCopy !req
281. I've been looking for.Copy !req
282. - Yeah?Copy !req
283. - Can you take over the
running of my house?Copy !req
284. - Well, well, yes.Copy !req
285. Come right ahead.Copy !req
286. - Shall we say three o'clock?Copy !req
287. - Let's say 2:00, goodbye. (yodeling)Copy !req
288. - Will you stop that infernal
caterwaulin' of yours?Copy !req
289. - It might be infernal
caterwaulin' to you,Copy !req
290. but it's pure catnip to men.Copy !req
291. Well, lookie there.Copy !req
292. I hit such a perfect
note, it busted the glass.Copy !req
293. - It wasn't your voice
that busted the glass,Copy !req
294. it was your face.Copy !req
295. - We'll see who gets the last laughCopy !req
296. when my sweetie comes.Copy !req
297. - What sweetie?Copy !req
298. - That's for me to know
and you to find out.Copy !req
299. Ha, ha, ha.Copy !req
300. - Ah!Copy !req
301. - Sure is nice of youCopy !req
302. to share your soap with Mrs. Drysdale.Copy !req
303. - Well, with my lye soap, she'll be happyCopy !req
304. to stay home and do her housework.Copy !req
305. - Granny, that's the most
powerful batch of soapCopy !req
306. that you ever made.Copy !req
307. Just a breeze blowing the back of meCopy !req
308. on the way over here has got me crying.Copy !req
309. - I make a big soap to do a big job.Copy !req
310. - Arrivederci, au revoir, toodle-loo!Copy !req
311. - Howdy, Mrs. Drysdale.
- Hello, hello.Copy !req
312. Goodbye, goodbye.Copy !req
313. - Where you goin'?Copy !req
314. - Milburn is sending me to a health farm.Copy !req
315. Martin, are we loaded?Copy !req
316. - Yes, ma'am.
- Well, let's fly, fly, fly!Copy !req
317. - Just a minute, Mrs. Drysdale.Copy !req
318. Granny and me brung you something.Copy !req
319. - Yeah, honey, take a good whiff of this.Copy !req
320. - How nice of you.Copy !req
321. Tell the gardener to spade
it in around the rose bushes.Copy !req
322. - Mrs. Drysdale, um-Copy !req
323. - Toodle-loo.Copy !req
324. - Oh, just a minute, ma'am.Copy !req
325. Granny and me'd like to talk to you.Copy !req
326. - I haven't time.Copy !req
327. The sooner I go,Copy !req
328. the sooner Milburn will have his new wife.Copy !req
329. - Did you say "new wife?"Copy !req
330. - Completely new.Copy !req
331. Young, glamorous,Copy !req
332. slim, trim and beautiful.Copy !req
333. Oh, Martin, did we pack my medicine?Copy !req
334. - Sixteen bottles, Mrs. Drysdale.Copy !req
335. - Good, drive on.Copy !req
336. Toodle-loo.Copy !req
337. - How could a woman be so cheerfulCopy !req
338. about her husband getting a younger wife?Copy !req
339. - You heard her, she's loaded.Copy !req
340. - Yeah, both of 'em, stewed to the gills.Copy !req
341. - Who do you reckon is the
woman that busted 'em up?Copy !req
342. - Hard to tell, Granny.Copy !req
343. There's so many young,
beautiful women out here.Copy !req
344. - Yeah.Copy !req
345. Probably one of them
glamorous movie stars.Copy !req
346. - Hey, ma.Copy !req
347. You sure are all fancied up.Copy !req
348. - Do I look like one of
them glamorous movie stars?Copy !req
349. - Yeah, by golly, you do!Copy !req
350. - Which one?Copy !req
351. - Milton Sills.Copy !req
352. - Go on, get out of here.Copy !req
353. Now, listen, you find your sister JethrineCopy !req
354. and your cousin Elly May,Copy !req
355. and tell them to start practicingCopy !req
356. to be bridesmaids for my wedding.Copy !req
357. - Are you getting married, Ma?Copy !req
358. - Well, it ain't official yet,Copy !req
359. but I sure got him anxious.Copy !req
360. Now get going.Copy !req
361. - Pick me up in about 15 minutes.Copy !req
362. Oh, Mrs. Bodine.Copy !req
363. - Why, Mr. Drysdale, you
are anxious. (laughing)Copy !req
364. If I'd have had a little more notice,Copy !req
365. I'd have baked you a sweet potato pie.Copy !req
366. It's one of my specialties.
- Oh.Copy !req
367. - Won't you sit down.Copy !req
368. - Thank you.
- Here, I'll take your hat.Copy !req
369. Yes, sir, I just love to cookCopy !req
370. and I love to sew and
I love to keep house.Copy !req
371. - Yes, I've heard you're
an exceptional housekeeper.Copy !req
372. - But I ain't one of them fussy ones.Copy !req
373. No, sir, not me.Copy !req
374. I say a man's home is his castle,Copy !req
375. and it is the duty of a womanCopy !req
376. to make him comfortable.Copy !req
377. - Oh.
- Hmm, here we go.Copy !req
378. Yes, sir.
- Oh!Copy !req
379. - A man works hard all dayCopy !req
380. and when he gets home,Copy !req
381. he has a right to enjoy his self.Copy !req
382. Take off his shoes-
- Oh!Copy !req
383. - And relax, and listen
to some soothing musicCopy !req
384. to calm his jangled nerves.Copy !req
385. - Please, Mrs. Bodine, not right now.Copy !req
386. - Mr. Drysdale, I've got to ask youCopy !req
387. to keep a grip on yourself.Copy !req
388. We're all alone in the house.Copy !req
389. - Mrs. Bodine, if you want
me to keep a grip on myself,Copy !req
390. I must ask you not to
play or sing or yodel.Copy !req
391. - I understand.Copy !req
392. Kinda makes you go all to pieces.Copy !req
393. - Yes, it does.Copy !req
394. - Well, you can come on
back, and you set down.Copy !req
395. Why Mr. Drysdale, you're perspirin'.Copy !req
396. Why, you gotta get relaxed.
- Please.Copy !req
397. - A man can't say what's on his mind,Copy !req
398. unless he's restin' easy.Copy !req
399. - Oh.
- Land sakes.Copy !req
400. And with that tie and collar a-chokin' ya,Copy !req
401. it's a wonder you can talk at all.Copy !req
402. - Mrs. Bodine, I'll be
all right, really I will.Copy !req
403. - Mr. Drysdale, you've got
a hole in your stocking.Copy !req
404. - Oh!Copy !req
405. - Oh, it's nothing to be ashamed of.Copy !req
406. When a man ain't got a woman
around to care for him,Copy !req
407. them things is bound to happen.Copy !req
408. - Stop that!Copy !req
409. - I declare, Mr.
Drysdale, you're ticklish.Copy !req
410. Now, look, I'm gonna let you set easy,Copy !req
411. and I'm gonna darn that
up before you know it.Copy !req
412. - Oh, Mrs. Bodine, no
really, I can manage.Copy !req
413. - Now, now, now, now, I
ain't takin' orders yet.Copy !req
414. - No, please, give me back my sock.Copy !req
415. - Now, get your-
- Give me my sock!Copy !req
416. - Oh, I know how to handle you.Copy !req
417. - What? (laughing)Copy !req
418. Ah, don't!Copy !req
419. That's not fair!Copy !req
420. - Uncle Jed, Granny,
Ma's gonna get married.Copy !req
421. - What?
- Who to?Copy !req
422. - Well, she wouldn't tell me,Copy !req
423. but she was expecting him any minute.Copy !req
424. I reckon he's inside right now.Copy !req
425. - Let's go in and see who it is.Copy !req
426. - Stop it! (laughs)
(Pearl laughing)Copy !req
427. (laughs) No, no, please!
- You said it!Copy !req
428. - Oh no, please! (laughs)Copy !req
429. No, please! (laughs)Copy !req
430. No, no, Mrs. Bodine! (laughs)
(Pearl laughs)Copy !req
431. No, no! (laughs)Copy !req
432. Oh, no, please!Copy !req
433. - It's Mr. Drysdale.Copy !req
434. - I reckon Pearl is the
young beautiful womanCopy !req
435. that busted up his marriage.Copy !req
436. - Ma?Copy !req
437. - It musta been her singin' and yodelin'Copy !req
438. that drove him to it.Copy !req
439. - (laughing) No, stop it!Copy !req
440. - Mr. Drysdale!Copy !req
441. - Mr. Clampett, I was just, uh,Copy !req
442. your cousin and I were...Copy !req
443. Oh, no, no, we weren't!Copy !req
444. - Jethro, leave the room.Copy !req
445. - Leave the house.Copy !req
446. - Did you have to come back right now?Copy !req
447. We was just going great.Copy !req
448. - Pearl, what's the matter with you?Copy !req
449. - Man crazy, always was.Copy !req
450. - Mr. Drysdale,Copy !req
451. get yourself decent, I'll
be back to talk to you.Copy !req
452. - Shame on ya!Copy !req
453. You too, Pearl, you home wrecker!Copy !req
454. - I don't know what you're talking about.Copy !req
455. You told me that Mr. DrysdaleCopy !req
456. was crazy about my yodelin',Copy !req
457. so I called him at the bank, and I yodeledCopy !req
458. and he come a runnin' over here to see me.Copy !req
459. - Pearl, you done yodeled your wayCopy !req
460. 'twixt Mr. Drysdale and his wife.Copy !req
461. - Wife? I didn't know he had a wife.Copy !req
462. - Well, he has.Copy !req
463. The sweetest, kindest, nicest,Copy !req
464. drunkenest woman you ever saw.Copy !req
465. - He done sent her to the farm,Copy !req
466. put her out to pasture,
so he can marry you.Copy !req
467. - We seen her leavin'.Copy !req
468. Oh, she knows about you, Pearl.Copy !req
469. Said her husband was gonna get a new wife.Copy !req
470. Young, glamorous, slim, beautiful.Copy !req
471. Jed, that can't be Pearl.Copy !req
472. - You're forgetting what a powerful spellCopy !req
473. her voice throws on a man.Copy !req
474. Now, Pearl, I'm going back in thereCopy !req
475. and try to talk some
sense to Mr. Drysdale.Copy !req
476. Whatever you do, don't yodel.Copy !req
477. - Oh, Mr. Clampett, I'm
terribly embarrassedCopy !req
478. about the picture we must have presentedCopy !req
479. when you came in,Copy !req
480. but I assure you, I wasn't at fault.Copy !req
481. Yes, your cousin, Pearl,
is one of the most—Copy !req
482. - Yeah, my cousin Pearl admittedCopy !req
483. that she called you on the telephoneCopy !req
484. and stirred you up.Copy !req
485. But she didn't know you was
gonna send your wife awayCopy !req
486. to make room for her.Copy !req
487. - Oh, but I didn't.Copy !req
488. In the first place, my wife is never home.Copy !req
489. In the second place,
if she does come home,Copy !req
490. there's still plenty of
room for both of them.Copy !req
491. - Mr. Drysdale, I hear a
tell that you folks out hereCopy !req
492. behaves a mite different
than we's used to.Copy !req
493. I know you're carrying a heavy loadCopy !req
494. on account of your wife,Copy !req
495. but I just can't let my cousin PearlCopy !req
496. get mixed up in any kinda
goin's-on like that.Copy !req
497. - Well, then, if I can't have Pearl,Copy !req
498. can I have Granny?Copy !req
499. - Lord love ya, you're a desperate man.Copy !req
500. - What are they sayin'?Copy !req
501. - How can I hear when
you keep pestering me?Copy !req
502. - Hi, ma.
- Oh!Copy !req
503. - Jed told you not to yodel.Copy !req
504. - I was screamin'.Copy !req
505. - I can't tell the difference.Copy !req
506. - What in the world happened to ya?Copy !req
507. - We was playin' football with some boys.Copy !req
508. - Yeah, and they sure was dumb.Copy !req
509. Jethrine was a-totin' the ball,Copy !req
510. and they kept a-tacklin' me!Copy !req
511. - Go get cleaned up, both of you.Copy !req
512. - Jethro says you want
us to be bridesmaidsCopy !req
513. at your wedding.Copy !req
514. - Yeah, who ya marryin', Aunt Pearl?Copy !req
515. - What's his name, Ma?Copy !req
516. - Puddin' and Tame.Copy !req
517. Ask me again, and I'll tell you the same.Copy !req
518. Now, get upstairs.Copy !req
519. - That's a funny name, Puddin' 'n Tame.Copy !req
520. - Oh, Ma don't care.Copy !req
521. She once said she'd marry Humpty Dumpty.Copy !req
522. - Well, I like Jethrine Tame
better than Jethrine Dumpty.Copy !req
523. - Upstairs, both of you!Copy !req
524. - That poor man in thereCopy !req
525. is so sick of his drinkin' wife,Copy !req
526. he is wanting to marry
either one of you two.Copy !req
527. - Last one in is an old maid! (laughs)Copy !req
528. - Granny, we's trying
to save the marriage,Copy !req
529. not bust it up,Copy !req
530. and I think I got an idea that'll do it.Copy !req
531. I want you two to wait in the kitchen,Copy !req
532. and when I bring Mr. Drysdale in,Copy !req
533. I want the two of you...Copy !req
534. Yes, sir, Mr. Drysdale.Copy !req
535. Both them fine, hardworkin', good cookin',Copy !req
536. housekeepin' women is
in the kitchen there.Copy !req
537. All you have to do is go in thereCopy !req
538. and take your pick.Copy !req
539. - Oh, this is marvelous of you.Copy !req
540. And they took the pledge.Copy !req
541. - Pearl, Granny!Copy !req
542. - Well, look who's here.Copy !req
543. It's old Jed himself. (laughs)Copy !req
544. - And there's Milburn baby.Copy !req
545. - You fellas want to dance?Copy !req
546. Come on, let's have a little dance.Copy !req
547. Come on, now. (laughs)Copy !req
548. - We can't dance in here.Copy !req
549. - Why not?Copy !req
550. - It's all downhill.Copy !req
551. - Take your pick now, Mr. Drysdale,Copy !req
552. while they can still
walk over to your house.Copy !req
553. - Oh, he's gonna pick me,
ain't ya, sweetie, Milbie?Copy !req
554. - Oh, no, he ain't.Copy !req
555. He's gonna take me, ain't ya?Copy !req
556. - You get your banker
grabbin' hands off a him!Copy !req
557. - Who you shovin'?Copy !req
558. Who you shovin', fella?Copy !req
559. Who you think your shovin', huh?Copy !req
560. I'll show you who yer shovin'.Copy !req
561. - How about taking both
of 'em, Mr. Drysdale?Copy !req
562. - No, thanks.Copy !req
563. - You done it, girls, bless ya both.Copy !req
564. - Pearl, you were just great.Copy !req
565. - So was you, Granny, darlin'.Copy !req
566. - Together, you saved that man's home,Copy !req
567. and you saved his marriage.Copy !req
568. Now, don't it give you a good feelin'?Copy !req
569. - Yeah.Copy !req
570. Well, I'm kinda winded.Copy !req
571. I think I'll go upstairs and rest.Copy !req
572. Call me when lunch is ready, Granny.Copy !req
573. - Oh, now, just a minute, Pearl, honey.Copy !req
574. We got a lot of mess to clean up here.Copy !req
575. - But Granny, darlin',Copy !req
576. you give me strict orders
to stay out of your kitchen.Copy !req
577. Remember?Copy !req
578. - Why, you low-down, no good-Copy !req
579. - Here we go again.Copy !req