The Beverly Hillbillies 1x11

Directed by Richard Whorf

Bea Benaderet as Cousin Pearl Bodine • Louis Nye as Sonny Drysdale • Phil Gordon as Jasper "Jazzbo" Depew • Linda Henning as Jethrine Bodine (voice)

When Sonny Drysdale promises to give Elly May a ring, Granny thinks he's going to propose and becomes a matchmaker. Cousin Pearl can't stand the idea that Elly May will get married before Jethrine, so she sets to matchmaking Jethrine with Jasper Depew.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. 🎵 I'm going to listen to my story.🎵

2. 🎵 About a man named Jed.🎵

3. 🎵 A poor Mountaineer barely🎵

4. 🎵 kept his family fed.🎵

5. 🎵 And then one day he was shooting up some food🎵

6. 🎵 and up through the ground, come a bumbling crud🎵

7. 🎵 Oil that is, black gold Texas tea.🎵

8. 🎵 Well, the first thing you know, old jibs🎵

9. 🎵 a millionaire the kin folk said,

10. 🎵 Jed, move away from there🎵

11. 🎵 said California is a place you ought to be.🎵

12. 🎵 so they loaded up the truck and moved to Beverly,🎵

13. 🎵 Hills,🎵

14. 🎵 that is.🎵

15. 🎵 swimming pools, movie stars.🎵

16. 🎵 The Beverly hillbillies.🎵

17. - Oh hi there Granny, whatchu looking at?

18. - Oh, I'm looking at these pictures

19. that Mr. guysdale took of Sonny and Ellie.

20. - Oh yeah,

21. he is right good ain't he?

22. - Dandy?

23. - Jed,I reckon we'll be having a wedding

24. around here pretty soon.

25. - How'd you know?

26. - Sonny's giving Ally a ring this morning.

27. I uh ..i couldn't get to sleep last night.

28. And I heard them talking

29. down by the door.

30. - All the way from your bedroom?

31. - Well, my window was open.

32. - That's still a powerful long ways to hear.

33. - Nah, that'd be to climb out

34. into a tree and shimmy down aways.

35. - (indistinctly) Sonny asking Ellie to get engaged?

36. - Plain as day.

37. Sonny said Ellie,' You're going to be home in the morning?'

38. And Ellie said yes.

39. Sonny said I'll give you a ring at 10 o'clock.

40. - (exclaims)well doggies.

41. - Well, It's pretty near straight after 10 right now.

42. - Hello?

43. Oh, morning Son,i mean uh Sonny.

44. Yeah Ellie's here. Why don't you come on over?

45. Oh you want to talk to her on the telephone?

46. Wait just a minute.

47. Can't give a girl no ring on the telephone.

48. Telephone Ellie.

49. Okay pop.I'll get it up here.

50. - Granny. You hadn't ought to be listening.

51. - Well, it's a lot easier than

52. shimming down a tree in the dark.

53. I tore my nightgown.

54. - We should send a bunch of these back home to cousin Pearl.

55. - What her?

56. - Yeah. You know how she was always bragging

57. about her daughter Jatherine

58. going to the beat Ellie-Mae to the altar.

59. - Yeah (laughs)

60. I sure would like to see the look on Pearl's face,

61. When she sees this.

62. - Jatherine, look at this.

63. And I always bragged

64. that you could beat Ellie-Mae to the altar.

65. - I can Ma,

66. I can outrun any man.

67. My legs is long.

68. - Look we gotta get busy.

69. Now what times that Jasper fella coming to court you?

70. - 6 o'clock.

71. He's taking me out in his car.

72. - Oh no he ain't.

73. He's courting you right here in my parlor.

74. Where I can see to it, that he gets to the point.

75. - Well, that's where he's taking me Ma.

76. Parking point.

77. There's a barn dance there.

78. - I'm talking about the point of proposing to you.

79. Don't You want to get yourself a husband?

80. - Yes.

81. - Jatherine why couldn't you have been born with

82. some of my brains instead of just my beauty?

83. - Of course I got admit that

84. you ain't quite as pretty is Ellie-Mae.

85. - I ain't even as pretty as her fella.

86. - You are so.

87. Hi Sonny.

88. - Hi stepdad.

89. - Well, how are you and Ellie-Mae Clavin getting along?

90. - Marvelously. She's mad about me.

91. - Oh!

92. how do you feel?

93. - The same.

94. - Really?

95. - I'm mad about me too.

96. - No, How you feel about her?

97. - Oh She's fun Stepdad. I like a lot.

98. I'm going over there now and take her for a drive.

99. - Good. Good.

100. - Her father has $25 million in my bank you know.

101. - Yes. I know.

102. - She's uh quite a beautiful girl. Don't you think?

103. - Oh ravishing.

104. - Hmm. You know I understand

105. these country girls make perfectly wonderful wives.

106. Strong, healthy

107. not afraid of a little work.

108. - So I understand.

109. - You know, Sonny, I have a position

110. opening down at my bank.

111. Oh It's not much to start with,

112. but advancement could be rapid with my help.

113. Certainly, it would be enough to rent a nice apartment.

114. Settle down,

115. take up housekeeping.

116. Why don't you think it over and discuss it with Ellie-Mae?

117. - Alright.

118. But with all the money her father has.

119. I doubt seriously if she'd want to work at your bank.

120. - You got something to show us Ellie-Mae?

121. - Here hold out your hand, let us take a look.

122. - Washed clean pop, I washed it with soap.

123. - No ring?

124. - No granny, I washed them all the way up to here.

125. - Sonny Guysdale didn't give you no engagement ring?

126. - Shucks no Pa.

127. Why'd he want to do that?

128. He's going to take me driving.

129. - That's bad.

130. Out driving in broad daylight.

131. Ain't no way to get engaged.

132. - What are you talking about.

133. I proposed to your daughter out driving.

134. - In a horse and buggy.

135. That's a heap different.

136. - Besides, that old mare of yours

137. knew right where she was going.

138. That way you could turn your attention on Rose Allen.

139. - That's a true.

140. - But out driving in an automobile

141. in city traffic with all them cars trying to hit you.

142. By the time you turn your head to say, will you?

143. Somebody has.

144. There's no two ways about it. (claps)

145. That child is going to need help

146. to track that Sonny Guysdale.

147. - Ellie-Mae don't need to trap

148. no man, to get him.

149. - Every man that ever got get was get that way.

150. - Not me.

151. We just happened to stop under a shady Elm tree.

152. And I propose your daughter on spur of the moment.

153. - That spur the moment of yours

154. took us six months, scheming and planning.

155. Why we even trained that old mare of yours

156. to stop under that shady old elm tree.

157. - Well, any trapping will have to be up to you, granny.

158. I wouldn't know what to do.

159. Except when I held the shotgun on Sonny

160. - Well.

161. I'll study on it.

162. Them city fellas might be different.

163. - Jed,

164. you reckon we'll ever find out where that music comes from?

165. - I reckon if we keep looking.

166. - You're wasting your time looking for that there music.

167. I've looked for it a dozen times.

168. And before you can find it,

169. somebody will come a rapping at the door.

170. See, told ya.

171. - Oh Hi Sonny.

172. - Greetings all.

173. Is Ella-Mae ready?

174. - She sure is, she's been ready since she's been 14.

175. - I beg your pardon?

176. - (yells) Well Mae, Sonny's here.

177. - What we want to know is,

178. Are you ready?

179. - Well, I sure hope you young folks have a dandy drive.

180. - Oh, we shall.

181. I plan to take Ellie on a socially significant drive

182. through Brentwood and Bel air to show her

183. Hi Sonny.

184. - Ellie Mae! You look positively divine.

185. - So do you Sonny.

186. - I know.

187. - Don't you bite me.

188. - Ellie Mae, a kiss on the hand is a very proper greeting.

189. - Oh!(kisses hand) Come on everybody, kiss Sonny's hand.

190. - Please, come on, out of my way.

191. - Well have a nice drive y'all.

192. - And if you pass under a shady elm tree

193. it wont hurt nun to stop for a still.

194. (engine revs)There they go.

195. Quick Jethrow start up the truck while I get my tools.

196. - Where are you going?

197. - To follow em.

198. - Now Hold on you two.

199. You can't follow Sonny. He'll see you.

200. - They won't know who we are.

201. We will be wearing dark glasses.

202. - He'll think we are a couple of Beverly Hills

203. movies stars out for a drive.

204. - Come on off that truck.

205. Come on.

206. - Jatherine, did you pour out the fudge out to cool?

207. yeah, Ma.

208. - but I'm afraid it ain't going to get hard.

209. - Well, if it don't, you and Jasper can eat it

210. with spoons and I'll tell him I made it.

211. you done dressing?

212. Yeah, Ma.

213. - Well, come on in here and let me see how you look.

214. Turn around let me see your sachet.

215. Let me get the bow straight.

216. Now, I want you to bring out them pillowcases.

217. You've been embroidering for your hope chest.

218. The ones with his and hers working French knots.

219. Never hurt nun, let a beau see you're handy with a needle.

220. - But I ain't.

221. I always stick myself.

222. - Well if you do, don't bleed on the pillowcase

223. where he will see it.

224. Now, when you are showing the stereopticon pictures,

225. These is the ones I've picked out for you.

226. They'll put him in the right mood.

227. Niagara falls by Moonlight, wedding under the Bauer,

228. the stolen kiss (laughs)

229. - (hits playfully) Lillian rosalyn tights

230. Oh never mind.

231. Now, what are you gonna play on the pump organ

232. for him to show off your music talent?

233. - How about Roussillon Springs?

234. - That's a dandy!

235. Full of runs and trills.

236. And then there's the part where you cross your hands.

237. Oh, I tell you Jatherine, that's one place

238. You got it over your cousin Ellie Mae,

239. Them hands can stretch part near two.

240. And them feet is made for pumping.

241. It's almost time for Jasper to get here.

242. How do you feel darling?

243. - I feel like I'm going to throw up.

244. - Now Jed.

245. Ellie and Stephanie will be here on the settee.

246. And when he gets on his knees and proposes to her

247. and Ellie says, yes, you'll come on running from that door.

248. I'll come on running from that door.

249. SOs we'll be having to be twitched us

250. And he can't back out.

251. - Granny, I don't want to be listening at no door.

252. And I don't think you at outta neither.

253. - Jed Clampett.

254. - No wonder your daughter's crowding 18

255. and still an old maid.

256. Why if we don't get busy.

257. Her cousin Jatherine will beat her to the alter by a mile.

258. She won't neither Ellie-Mae is a lot Prettier in Jatherine.

259. - Looks ain't everything.

260. Besides, Jatherine has Pearl helping her and Pearl's parlor.

261. And that's the styliest

262. and best court in parlor in the whole County.

263. - I don't see nothing wrong with this parlor.

264. - Oh, that's cause you're a man.

265. This ain't got no style to it.

266. Ain't got no lace curtains.

267. Ain't got no port tears.

268. Ain't no tidies or doilies.

269. Ain't even got a pump organ.

270. - Got a piano.

271. - A piano ain't enough.

272. With a pump organ, when it comes to courting,

273. he's got a quiver tort

274. Just drives a man wild.

275. And there ain't nothing that stirs a man

276. like seeing a woman pumping a pump organ.

277. - I wish Sonny and Ellie-Mae would get back.

278. Wonder what's keeping them?

279. - My baby shoes.

280. Aren't they cunning?

281. - (knocks them together) awfully stiff.

282. I don't see how you ever walked in em.

283. - But I had them brazed.

284. - Didn't help much, they're still still.

285. - What's this say?

286. - Oh, that's my Teddy bear.

287. His name is poo.

288. Would you like to kiss him?

289. - Well not especially.

290. - I guess you'd rather kiss me.

291. - I'll kiss the bear.

292. - Uh I guess you're not in a very romantic mood.

293. A little music will remedy that.

294. Do you like to dance?

295. - I ain't never tried.

296. - Well, you're in for the buying experience.

297. I'll teach you.

298. Now watch.

299. - How do I look?

300. - Like something's a hurting you.

301. Maybe some rose thorns is stuck in your gum.

302. - (switches off music) Enough of this preliminaries.

303. Come here.

304. My dear.

305. Are you frightened?

306. - No. Had I oughta be?

307. Yes.

308. You're in great danger.

309. - How come?

310. - You're in a man's room alone.

311. - No mind, you're here.

312. - You are not playing the game.

313. - You're feeling sick to your stomach darling?

314. - Yeah, Ma.

315. Well, I went out to seller

316. and I drawled off some homemade elderberry wine.

317. Ain't nothing in the world better

318. for settling a queasy stomach.

319. Of course according to the rules,

320. You shouldn't touch spirits

321. Until your wedding day, but I guess

322. in case of an emergency, a little swallow won't hurt.

323. I know its might bitter tasting.

324. But try and force a little down, it'll make you feel better.

325. Now just a little more Jatherine.

326. Do it for your Ma.

327. Jeff will be here any minute now.

328. Feeling better?

329. - A little.

330. - I got it figured how we get you to play

331. The pump organ for you.

332. I know just what he'll say when he walks in.

333. Cause everybody does.

334. He'll say,

335. 'Why i declare,

336. that's a mighty fancy pump organ you got there.'

337. And I'll say,' why thank you.'

338. I'm mighty parts of the pump organ music.'

339. And then you say, ' why I'll play something.'

340. And then you sit down.

341. And you play like you've never played before.

342. You understand?

343. - Yes.

344. (doorbell rings) there he is.

345. - You ain't gon throw up? Are you?

346. - I'm fine now.

347. - Evening Miss Boldine.

348. - Why Jasper Depute, what a surprise.

349. - Jetherine hunny, look who's here.

350. - Evening Jetherine.

351. - Jetherine got a little nervous offset.

352. I reckon it's the strain

353. of all those bows that cover cotton.

354. I swear i got a sweet model

355. Of this bottle every day.

356. - Hey that's a mighty fancy pump organ you got there, man.

357. - Why thank you.

358. - I'm mighty partial to pump organ music.

359. In fact, I'd just love to hear some pump organ music.

360. Right now.

361. - I'll play you some ma'am.

362. - Jed.

363. Its plum past dark and Sonny and Ellie ain't home yet.

364. Where could they be?

365. What are they doing?

366. Are they engaged?

367. Why don't we hear something?

368. Oh that poor sweet innocent Ellie-Mae.

369. Out there in the dark with a man.

370. - Jed maybe something happened now maybe something..

371. - (interrupts) Granny, calm down.

372. Ellie can take care of herself.

373. - I reckon you ain't nervous. Huh?

374. - Heck no just sitting here whittling.

375. - Well what you're whittling on

376. used to be the arm of that chair.

377. - Reckon,I am a might nervous at that.

378. - Now Jet, when they do get home.

379. You and me have got to see

380. that Sonny don't get away without being proper engaged.

381. - Granny, maybe we is rushing things.

382. Maybe Sonny ain't ready to get married.

383. - Jed.

384. No man is ready to get married.

385. You gotta get him ready.

386. Like you get a steer ready for slaughter.

387. - Can't you find something else to compare it to.

388. Well, Here we are.

389. - I reckon it's time to say good night.

390. I sure do thank you for the nice ride Sonny.

391. My pleasure Ellie-Mae.

392. I'll give you a ring in the morning.

393. Promises. Promises.

394. - Would you like to take another drive tomorrow?

395. - I sure would.

396. Where shall we go?

397. - To the preachers.

398. - Any place you say Sonny.

399. - Well, See you tomorrow then.

400. - Oh,(sings)here comes the bride, here comes the bride.

401. [Ellie-Mae] Howdy granny?

402. - Well damn, look who's here.

403. Jed.

404. Come say hello to Sonny.

405. - Don't bother Mr. Clampett. I'm leaving.

406. - I'll show you a shortcut.

407. - Howdy Sonny.

408. - Good evening Mr. Clampett.

409. - Jed.

410. Now's the time to have that talk with Sonny.

411. - What talk?

412. - About Ellie Mae.

413. - I got nothing to talk to Sonny about Ellie.

414. - Oh that's right.

415. I'm the one that's going to talk to Sonny.

416. You talk to Ellie Mae.

417. - Did you have something to tell me, pop?

418. - Well I hadn't planned on it.

419. - But uh maybe now's a good time.

420. Sit down.

421. Ellie.

422. - Yeah Pa.

423. - Women folks like uh your granny

424. and your aunt Pearl seem to set Grid store

425. by matchmaking.

426. They just can't rest easy till everybody's paired up.

427. And the sooner, the better.

428. Now your granny,

429. Wants you to marry up with Sonny drivedeal.

430. - Do you want me to marry up with him Pa?

431. - Ellie Mae.

432. There's only one thing in the world

433. I want for you and that's to be happy.

434. - Do you reckon I'd be happy, married up to Sonny.

435. - Only if you love him.

436. - Well, how do you know if you love somebody?

437. - Well I can't exactly explain how you know,

438. But when it happens you'll' know.

439. You don't nobody to shove you.

440. You just can't wait to get married.

441. Now do feel that way about you Sonny?

442. - Well I ain't sure.

443. Do you reckon he feels that way about me?

444. - Now tell me, how do you feel about getting married

445. and settling down and raising a family?

446. - I find the notion completely repugnant.

447. - Oh that's good.

448. - One man who simply cannot be monogamous.

449. - Fine and dandy.

450. - How do you feel about Ellie?

451. - I find her beautiful, charming, refreshingly different

452. but somewhat lacking in the social graces.

453. - What's that mean?

454. - Well, for example, she can't dance.

455. - Ellie Mae Clampett why she's got dancing in her soul.

456. I am her grand maw and I want you to know

457. I was the best dog gone dancers

458. that ever came out of the Tennessee Hills.

459. And hall park and I'll stomp a riled up mule.

460. Cmon city boy.

461. Us clappers is going to set your shoes to smoking.

462. - By the way you young people today.

463. - Not me. I'll go for some of that fudge.

464. - (snaps fingers)

465. - C'mon hunny lets dance.

466. - (stammers) I'll ..I'll turn on the controllers for you.

467. - C'mon sweetie, let's dance.

468. - Light on her feet ain't she?

469. - You'd never know sh was moving em.

470. - (music plays)

471. - Cmon. lets go

472. - (cheers) go go go.

473. - Yeehaw.

474. - Hey, what are y'all dancing for?

475. - We are celebrating your cousin Ellie-Mae getting married.

476. - Is Ellie getting married?

477. - She sure is.

478. - Really? Who is she marrying?

479. - You.

480. - Me.

481. - That's right.

482. - (yells in frustration) Mother!

483. Mother!