1. Captioning sponsored byCopy !req
2. and REGENCY TELEVISIONCopy !req
3. America, we've had someCopy !req
4. good times together, right?Copy !req
5. So now you know me.Copy !req
6. Even with the television show,Copy !req
7. I'm still Bernie Mac.Copy !req
8. I still say the thingsCopy !req
9. you want to say, but you can't.Copy !req
10. I'm not saying it's easy.Copy !req
11. See, every week somebody'sCopy !req
12. in my face, talking aboutCopy !req
13. "Bernie Mac, you can't say this.Copy !req
14. Bernie Mac, you can't say that."Copy !req
15. I told you televisionCopy !req
16. was not going to change meCopy !req
17. and it hasn't.Copy !req
18. I still say what I want.Copy !req
19. You hear me?Copy !req
20. I'm still not sureCopy !req
21. what the problem is.Copy !req
22. Is Bryana hurt?Copy !req
23. Oh, something she said.Copy !req
24. Well, what did she say?Copy !req
25. You don't want to discuss itCopy !req
26. over the phone?Copy !req
27. Okay, I'm on my way.Copy !req
28. What did baby girl say?Copy !req
29. I thought in the timeCopy !req
30. it would take you to get hereCopy !req
31. I would have the courageCopy !req
32. to repeat it.Copy !req
33. But, um...Copy !req
34. You can't say it?Copy !req
35. Well, can you write it down?Copy !req
36. I already did.Copy !req
37. Baby girl said this?Copy !req
38. Now, see, whatCopy !req
39. I cannot understand, Mr. MacCopy !req
40. is where she could haveCopy !req
41. heard it.Copy !req
42. I mean, who would have saidCopy !req
43. such an ugly,Copy !req
44. hateful, angry thing?Copy !req
45. Hey, baby?Copy !req
46. Hmm?Copy !req
47. The phone bill'sCopy !req
48. kind of high this month.Copy !req
49. Look at that.Copy !req
50. Oh, Vanessa wasCopy !req
51. doing good in schoolCopy !req
52. so I let herCopy !req
53. call some friends.Copy !req
54. Nessa?Copy !req
55. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
56. You still gotCopy !req
57. to watch her, baby.Copy !req
58. I mean, she alreadyCopy !req
59. thinks we're rich.Copy !req
60. Well, compared toCopy !req
61. where she's from...Copy !req
62. Yeah, but she thinksCopy !req
63. we're all country club rich.Copy !req
64. Old money rich.Copy !req
65. Shoot, we're justCopy !req
66. Nigga rich.Copy !req
67. What?Copy !req
68. Look at that.Copy !req
69. I don't mean to talkCopy !req
70. out of turnCopy !req
71. but we here at WellingtonCopy !req
72. don't consider this to beCopy !req
73. appropriate language.Copy !req
74. You know, I agreeCopy !req
75. and I'm going to talkCopy !req
76. to baby girlCopy !req
77. and I guarantee you she willCopy !req
78. never use that word again.Copy !req
79. Well, that's great.Copy !req
80. But, Mr. Mac?Copy !req
81. Yes?Copy !req
82. I don't mean to talkCopy !req
83. out of turn againCopy !req
84. but I'm not sure thatCopy !req
85. it's appropriateCopy !req
86. for anyone to say.Copy !req
87. Well, it's...Copy !req
88. Look, I don't mean to overstep.Copy !req
89. No, no, no. Step.Copy !req
90. I mean, maybe I'm not inCopy !req
91. a position to say...Copy !req
92. No, no, you're in a position.Copy !req
93. If I'm speaking out of turn...Copy !req
94. It's your turn to speak.Copy !req
95. But isn't this such an uglyCopy !req
96. hateful,Copy !req
97. angry word?Copy !req
98. You know, let me explain.Copy !req
99. I'm not quite sureCopy !req
100. I really know how to explainCopy !req
101. but when I was growing upCopy !req
102. we used this wordCopy !req
103. in many different waysCopy !req
104. and we didn't reallyCopy !req
105. mean anything by it.Copy !req
106. For example, if someoneCopy !req
107. did something ridiculousCopy !req
108. we would say,Copy !req
109. "Look at that crazy..."Copy !req
110. Or if a brotherCopy !req
111. was real toughCopy !req
112. we'd say,Copy !req
113. "That's one bad..."Copy !req
114. You know, or ifCopy !req
115. a cat smelled real badCopy !req
116. we would say,Copy !req
117. "Old stinkin'..."Copy !req
118. Okay. Thank you, Mr. Mac.Copy !req
119. I understand your point.Copy !req
120. Now hold up, America.Copy !req
121. See, Bernie Mac is not condoningCopy !req
122. the use of this word.Copy !req
123. I'm just trying to explainCopy !req
124. to herCopy !req
125. how I used it in the pastCopy !req
126. and I'm quite sureCopy !req
127. some of you...Copy !req
128. But that's all right.Copy !req
129. Bernie Mac ain't mad at you.Copy !req
130. Anyway, I've used it, too.Copy !req
131. See, I'm just being truthfulCopy !req
132. so before y'all startCopy !req
133. casting stonesCopy !req
134. let's move on.Copy !req
135. Let me sh...Copy !req
136. No, y'all don't need to seeCopy !req
137. everything.Copy !req
138. You don't need to knowCopy !req
139. everything.Copy !req
140. She said, "N..."Copy !req
141. ( talking whileCopy !req
142. brushing teeth )Copy !req
143. everybody watching meCopy !req
144. and I ain't got no privacy.Copy !req
145. I understand, baby.Copy !req
146. But we should watchCopy !req
147. what we say in frontCopy !req
148. of Bryana, though.Copy !req
149. Honestly, sweetheartCopy !req
150. I didn't knowCopy !req
151. she was over there.Copy !req
152. I wasn't tryingCopy !req
153. to hurt nobody.Copy !req
154. She alreadyCopy !req
155. eavesdropping.Copy !req
156. Honey...Copy !req
157. I think it's moreCopy !req
158. than that, you know?Copy !req
159. When it was justCopy !req
160. you and me in the houseCopy !req
161. there were certain thingsCopy !req
162. that we could doCopy !req
163. certain thingsCopy !req
164. that we could sayCopy !req
165. and now we haveCopy !req
166. a house full of kids.Copy !req
167. We're role models now.Copy !req
168. Role models!Copy !req
169. Role model?Copy !req
170. Huh. I'm already a role model.Copy !req
171. Oh, come on, America.Copy !req
172. Y'all see me every week.Copy !req
173. I feed those kids,Copy !req
174. I keep them in lineCopy !req
175. I put a roof over their headCopy !req
176. and you're going to tell meCopy !req
177. I'm not a role model?Copy !req
178. Please. That's not granted.Copy !req
179. Sometimes my methods areCopy !req
180. a little coarseCopy !req
181. but I don't have anyCopy !req
182. outside kidsCopy !req
183. you know what I'm saying?Copy !req
184. Now, see, Bernie Mac,Copy !req
185. he's one of those...Copy !req
186. Uncle Bernie?Copy !req
187. Did I say something bad?Copy !req
188. Come here, baby girl.Copy !req
189. Oh...Copy !req
190. You know...Copy !req
191. I said something badCopy !req
192. and I shouldn'tCopy !req
193. have said it.Copy !req
194. My big mouth.Copy !req
195. And I don't ever want youCopy !req
196. to say it again, okay?Copy !req
197. Okay.Copy !req
198. Uncle Bernie?Copy !req
199. Hmm?Copy !req
200. Are you goingCopy !req
201. to say it anymore?Copy !req
202. I'm going to tryCopy !req
203. my best not toCopy !req
204. and I want you to pray forCopy !req
205. your Uncle Bernie, okay?Copy !req
206. Okay.Copy !req
207. Now do me a favor.Copy !req
208. I want you to goCopy !req
209. in the kitchenCopy !req
210. pour yourselfCopy !req
211. some chocolate milkCopy !req
212. and I'm goingCopy !req
213. to come in thereCopy !req
214. and we're going to haveCopy !req
215. some together, okay?Copy !req
216. Okay.Copy !req
217. Hey, I love you.Copy !req
218. You didn't say nothing back.Copy !req
219. There you have it, America.Copy !req
220. I guess Bernie MacCopy !req
221. can't say whatever he wants.Copy !req
222. All right, I learned my lesson.Copy !req
223. End of story.Copy !req
224. Sorry, America,Copy !req
225. I guess it's a short one tonightCopy !req
226. and I don't thinkCopy !req
227. I need to tie up any loose endsCopy !req
228. you know what I mean?Copy !req
229. So, what can I possibly sayCopy !req
230. right now?Copy !req
231. What could be said?Copy !req
232. Come on, Mr. Cooley.Copy !req
233. What do you meanCopy !req
234. we got a problem?Copy !req
235. No, I saidCopy !req
236. "potential problem."Copy !req
237. Potential problem?Copy !req
238. Well, Mr. MacCopy !req
239. the teacher doesn't wantCopy !req
240. to talk out of turnCopy !req
241. but she's concerned aboutCopy !req
242. your choice of wordsCopy !req
243. around the children.Copy !req
244. They seem hostile to her.Copy !req
245. Hostile? Cooley, I ain't saidCopy !req
246. nothing hostile to those kids.Copy !req
247. Well, weren't you angryCopy !req
248. about a phone bill?Copy !req
249. Yeah, I was ang...Copy !req
250. I mean, I wasn't angryCopy !req
251. when I said...Copy !req
252. Um...Copy !req
253. I know she told youCopy !req
254. what I said.Copy !req
255. Once again, she didn't wantCopy !req
256. to talk out of turn.Copy !req
257. For somebody who doesn't wantCopy !req
258. to talk out of turnCopy !req
259. she sure is bumping her gums.Copy !req
260. Mr. Mac...Copy !req
261. Come on!Copy !req
262. You've known meCopy !req
263. for a while now.Copy !req
264. I'm a good person.Copy !req
265. I do good by those kids, man.Copy !req
266. You know, and I mean,Copy !req
267. to some other kidCopy !req
268. I'd probably be a role model.Copy !req
269. I'm not going to file a report.Copy !req
270. This was obviouslyCopy !req
271. a misunderstanding.Copy !req
272. All right, fine, that'sCopy !req
273. what I'm talking about.Copy !req
274. So we're cool again, right?Copy !req
275. Just one word in advice.Copy !req
276. I know her kind.Copy !req
277. She's one of thoseCopy !req
278. touchy-feely Berkeley types.Copy !req
279. Just be extra-carefulCopy !req
280. what you say around herCopy !req
281. especially in anger.Copy !req
282. Oh, come on now,Copy !req
283. Cooley, come on...Copy !req
284. Then you won't haveCopy !req
285. to have somebody like meCopy !req
286. coming aroundCopy !req
287. and wasting your time.Copy !req
288. I want to go play.Copy !req
289. No, you don't.Copy !req
290. You're going to sitCopy !req
291. right thereCopy !req
292. and you're going toCopy !req
293. wait on your sister.Copy !req
294. Come on, Uncle Bernie.Copy !req
295. Jordan, I said sit thereCopy !req
296. and wait on your sister.Copy !req
297. That's what I mean.Copy !req
298. You want to race?Copy !req
299. No, I don't want to race.Copy !req
300. I just want to sit right hereCopy !req
301. and wait on your sister.Copy !req
302. There she is.Copy !req
303. Jordan! No, you don't.Copy !req
304. You better not haveCopy !req
305. put a dent in my car, I swear.Copy !req
306. There's a dent,Copy !req
307. I'll put your handCopy !req
308. right in the door and smash it.Copy !req
309. I'm not kidding.Copy !req
310. Every time I try to tell youCopy !req
311. something...Copy !req
312. Oh, Jordan!Copy !req
313. What's wrong with you?Copy !req
314. Are you blind?Copy !req
315. Huh?Copy !req
316. What do I have to do to putCopy !req
317. some sense in your head,Copy !req
318. Jordan?Copy !req
319. Beat you in the headCopy !req
320. with a dictionary?Copy !req
321. It ain't goingCopy !req
322. to do no goodCopy !req
323. 'cause you ain'tCopy !req
324. going to see it comingCopy !req
325. your big, thick pop-bottleCopy !req
326. glasses you got on.Copy !req
327. Jordan, I swear,Copy !req
328. you make me soCopy !req
329. doggone angryCopy !req
330. I just want to wring your neck,Copy !req
331. you stupid little beetle!Copy !req
332. You...Copy !req
333. Hi, Uncle Bernie!Copy !req
334. Stupid little beetle?Copy !req
335. Oh, Lord...Copy !req
336. Hi.Copy !req
337. The boy dented my car, Cooley.Copy !req
338. I'm not saying thatCopy !req
339. you're not justified.Copy !req
340. What you saying, then?Copy !req
341. I get peeved myself.Copy !req
342. You're not a bad man.Copy !req
343. It's just the words you chose.Copy !req
344. Cooley...Copy !req
345. Look...Copy !req
346. it's not like I'm hereCopy !req
347. to take away the kids.Copy !req
348. You know what, Cooley?Copy !req
349. That's not a bad idea.Copy !req
350. That's a solution.Copy !req
351. You need to take away the kids.Copy !req
352. I'm a bad man, Cooley.Copy !req
353. Okay, Mr. Mac, if ICopy !req
354. thought you were seriousCopy !req
355. I'd be worriedCopy !req
356. but I know that heart'sCopy !req
357. in the right place, okay?Copy !req
358. Okay, man, that's it.Copy !req
359. Well, not quite.Copy !req
360. I'm going to have toCopy !req
361. visit you periodicallyCopy !req
362. over the next weekCopy !req
363. for observation.Copy !req
364. What?Copy !req
365. Just to make sureCopy !req
366. this isn't a hostileCopy !req
367. environment.Copy !req
368. See, Cooley,Copy !req
369. there you go againCopy !req
370. with that doggone wordCopy !req
371. "hostile."Copy !req
372. What do you mean by "hostile"?Copy !req
373. Well, it's justCopy !req
374. standard procedure.Copy !req
375. Oh, Cooley, you...Copy !req
376. Mr. Mac...Copy !req
377. this is nothing to beCopy !req
378. overly concerned about.Copy !req
379. Just watch your words.Copy !req
380. Watch my words.Copy !req
381. Come on, America, how am ICopy !req
382. suppose to watch my words?Copy !req
383. What the hell is this?Copy !req
384. Let's move on.Copy !req
385. What?Copy !req
386. Did you remember to signCopy !req
387. my permission slipCopy !req
388. for the Covina meet?Copy !req
389. You do your homework?Copy !req
390. Yeah.Copy !req
391. All of it? Your math?Copy !req
392. Yeah.Copy !req
393. Well, Nessa, if youCopy !req
394. did your homeworkCopy !req
395. you'd know thatCopy !req
396. your permission slipCopy !req
397. inside your math book.Copy !req
398. Nessa, you justCopy !req
399. lied to me.Copy !req
400. Just for thatCopy !req
401. you spend two daysCopy !req
402. in your room.Copy !req
403. Two days? That's not fair.Copy !req
404. You know what? You're right.Copy !req
405. Let's make it three.Copy !req
406. Two plus one is three.Copy !req
407. You'd know that ifCopy !req
408. you did your math.Copy !req
409. But...Copy !req
410. But nothing.Copy !req
411. What you mean "but"?Copy !req
412. You keep on talking, youCopy !req
413. get a life sentence.Copy !req
414. You'll never see the sun.Copy !req
415. Now, go to yourCopy !req
416. room, Nessa.Copy !req
417. You little liar.Copy !req
418. Baby girl, come on,Copy !req
419. put some clothes on.Copy !req
420. But I'm Beach Barbie.Copy !req
421. Baby... baby girl, look.Copy !req
422. Look.Copy !req
423. It's too cold for youCopy !req
424. to wear that.Copy !req
425. You going to mess around,Copy !req
426. you're going to get sick.Copy !req
427. But Beach BarbieCopy !req
428. wears a bikini.Copy !req
429. But Beach BarbieCopy !req
430. can't catch a cold, baby.Copy !req
431. Okay, you want to wear thatCopy !req
432. you're going to catch the flue.Copy !req
433. And if you catch the flueCopy !req
434. and start throwing upCopy !req
435. I'm not going to do nothing.Copy !req
436. And if you start throwing up,Copy !req
437. I'm going to make you lie in it.Copy !req
438. Now, you want to do that?Copy !req
439. No.Copy !req
440. Baby girl, could you pleaseCopy !req
441. put on some clothes?Copy !req
442. Okay.Copy !req
443. Thank you.Copy !req
444. Now, that's good parenting.Copy !req
445. Jordan, put that ice cream up.Copy !req
446. You're about to eat dinnerCopy !req
447. in a few minutes.Copy !req
448. Oh, but I'm hungry now.Copy !req
449. I didn't ask you that.Copy !req
450. I said put it up.Copy !req
451. Oh, come on, Uncle Bernie.Copy !req
452. If I tell you again, JordanCopy !req
453. you're going toCopy !req
454. be holding the cartonCopy !req
455. to the lump I putCopy !req
456. on your head.Copy !req
457. Put it up.Copy !req
458. Aw...Copy !req
459. What's that you're writing,Copy !req
460. Jordan?Copy !req
461. Nothing.Copy !req
462. Let me see it.Copy !req
463. Move.Copy !req
464. "State of California,Copy !req
465. Department of Social Service."Copy !req
466. What the hell is this?Copy !req
467. That's a standardCopy !req
468. Social Services form.Copy !req
469. For what?Copy !req
470. Well, sometimes in ourCopy !req
471. passionate expressivenessCopy !req
472. we can be careless withCopy !req
473. the words we choose.Copy !req
474. And this is justCopy !req
475. a little exerciseCopy !req
476. to help us withCopy !req
477. our awareness.Copy !req
478. It's an awareness exercise.Copy !req
479. Oh, Cooley, I'm aware.Copy !req
480. I'm aware I got a coupleCopy !req
481. of stool pigeonsCopy !req
482. trying to send me downCopy !req
483. the doggone river, Cooley.Copy !req
484. No, Mr. Mac, they're justCopy !req
485. writing down your words.Copy !req
486. Uh, for instance,Copy !req
487. Vanessa said hereCopy !req
488. that you would lock herCopy !req
489. in her roomCopy !req
490. and she would never see the sun?Copy !req
491. Uh-uh, now-now,Copy !req
492. Cooley, Cooley, that wasCopy !req
493. that was taken out of context.Copy !req
494. Well, not seeing the sunCopy !req
495. in any context is harsh.Copy !req
496. Let's move on.Copy !req
497. Okay...Copy !req
498. Jordan said he'd haveCopy !req
499. to hold ice creamCopy !req
500. to the lump you gaveCopy !req
501. him on his head.Copy !req
502. No, no, no,Copy !req
503. I'm-I'm not going down for that.Copy !req
504. I was referringCopy !req
505. to the ice cream.Copy !req
506. Well, lump on a child'sCopy !req
507. head is hostile.Copy !req
508. Wh-Wh-What'd you suggest I say?Copy !req
509. Knot? Bump? Contusion?Copy !req
510. I'm just saying thatCopy !req
511. a head injury to a childCopy !req
512. is inappropriate.Copy !req
513. Oh... that's bull!Copy !req
514. "Bull."Copy !req
515. Can you believe this?Copy !req
516. They got the kids diming on me.Copy !req
517. All right, cool.Copy !req
518. Let them twist Bernie Mac wordsCopy !req
519. to sound like they're angryCopy !req
520. or hostile.Copy !req
521. I'm going to tell youCopy !req
522. what I'm going to do, America.Copy !req
523. I'm going to slap the tasteCopy !req
524. out of one of their mouths.Copy !req
525. That's right.Copy !req
526. I can see them nowCopy !req
527. "Uncle Bernie,Copy !req
528. I can't taste my breakfast."Copy !req
529. That's because Uncle BernieCopy !req
530. slapped the tasteCopy !req
531. out of your mouth.Copy !req
532. Did I go too far?Copy !req
533. Stool pigeon. Rats. Tricks.Copy !req
534. "How would you likeCopy !req
535. a four-knuckle tattoo"?Copy !req
536. No, no, no, no, now hold on.Copy !req
537. Hold on, now, Cooley.Copy !req
538. I never said nothing...Copy !req
539. Let's... let's move on.Copy !req
540. "Jump down your throatCopy !req
541. and stomp on your liver"?Copy !req
542. Hold... Cooley, hold on.Copy !req
543. Now, you know that's not evenCopy !req
544. physically possible.Copy !req
545. You know that, Cooley.Copy !req
546. "Nanny-nanny boo-boo.Copy !req
547. Stick your head in doo-doo."Copy !req
548. What? That's good, right?Copy !req
549. "I'm going shoppingCopy !req
550. for a tiny pink coffin"?Copy !req
551. Look... look here.Copy !req
552. I was talking aboutCopy !req
553. the little Barbie doll.Copy !req
554. There's no way in heckCopy !req
555. I was talking aboutCopy !req
556. little baby girl like that.Copy !req
557. Come on, you know I wouldn't sayCopy !req
558. nothing like that.Copy !req
559. Cooley, I swear. Come on.Copy !req
560. I can't eat... but I...Copy !req
561. See, that's...Copy !req
562. I can't say...Copy !req
563. All right, fine. Fine.Copy !req
564. I ain't saying nothing.Copy !req
565. No, you don't.Copy !req
566. Yes, I do!Copy !req
567. No, you don't.Copy !req
568. Be quiet!Copy !req
569. You baby, be quiet!Copy !req
570. You stupid jerk!Copy !req
571. Cut it out!Copy !req
572. Shut up!Copy !req
573. Leave me alone!Copy !req
574. You alwaysCopy !req
575. get your way.Copy !req
576. No, you don't.Copy !req
577. Yes, I do!Copy !req
578. No, I don't!Copy !req
579. Yes, you do!Copy !req
580. No, I don't!Copy !req
581. Yes, you do,Copy !req
582. little baby!Copy !req
583. No, I don't!Copy !req
584. Yes, you do,Copy !req
585. little ugly baby!Copy !req
586. So what happened?Copy !req
587. Yo, all kinds of stuff.Copy !req
588. She had this little paddle.Copy !req
589. Wanted me to act likeCopy !req
590. a naughty boy.Copy !req
591. This girl was fine,Copy !req
592. too, man.Copy !req
593. I'd take a spankingCopy !req
594. from her.Copy !req
595. Would you?Copy !req
596. Yeah, I would.Copy !req
597. Would you take one now?Copy !req
598. Give me all the chips,Copy !req
599. baby, all the chips.Copy !req
600. Yes, sir.Copy !req
601. Hey.Copy !req
602. I took five dollars offCopy !req
603. your dresser for nail polish.Copy !req
604. Oh, okay.Copy !req
605. Hey, man.Copy !req
606. Uh-huh.Copy !req
607. You all right?Copy !req
608. Yeah.Copy !req
609. Yeah, I'm fine.Copy !req
610. I think she said sheCopy !req
611. took your money, man.Copy !req
612. I heard her.Copy !req
613. Yo, yo, man, uhCopy !req
614. you want me toCopy !req
615. handle up on this?Copy !req
616. Look, fellas, I'm fine.Copy !req
617. Come on, I thought weCopy !req
618. were going to play cards.Copy !req
619. Okay, I'll deal, then.Copy !req
620. Yeah, well, justCopy !req
621. deal the cards.Copy !req
622. Bernie.Copy !req
623. You sure you'reCopy !req
624. all right, man?Copy !req
625. I'm fine.Copy !req
626. You all right?Copy !req
627. When the last timeCopy !req
628. you had a physical?Copy !req
629. Six months ago.Copy !req
630. You check your hearing?Copy !req
631. I said I'm fine.Copy !req
632. You fine?Copy !req
633. Deal the damn cards.Copy !req
634. Deal them.Copy !req
635. All right.Copy !req
636. Oh, go on, man.Copy !req
637. I'm fine.Copy !req
638. Damn. Let's play some cards.Copy !req
639. Ooh, Chewy Bears.Copy !req
640. Ugh, those are...Copy !req
641. I hate those.Copy !req
642. Hey!Copy !req
643. Jordan, baby girl,Copy !req
644. stop it, please.Copy !req
645. What you looking at?Copy !req
646. Did I say anything to youCopy !req
647. when you picked about, whatCopy !req
648. 15, 16 items?Copy !req
649. Don't turn your back on meCopy !req
650. when I'm talking to you.Copy !req
651. You the one started it.Copy !req
652. Yeah, you better walk away.Copy !req
653. Yeah, walk away and judgeCopy !req
654. somebody else's kids.Copy !req
655. That's right.Copy !req
656. What everybody looking at?Copy !req
657. Everybody all in my business.Copy !req
658. America, you knowCopy !req
659. what need to be done.Copy !req
660. You know what they need.Copy !req
661. I can't do nothing.Copy !req
662. My hands are tied.Copy !req
663. Look, they took thatCopy !req
664. away from me.Copy !req
665. America, I am truly sorryCopy !req
666. about that.Copy !req
667. I just couldn't hold it in.Copy !req
668. I shouldn't haveCopy !req
669. taken it out on her.Copy !req
670. If any one of you allCopy !req
671. know her out thereCopy !req
672. please tell her that Bernie MacCopy !req
673. is sorry, please.Copy !req
674. I know better than that.Copy !req
675. I was brought upCopy !req
676. better than that.Copy !req
677. Big Mama gave me home training.Copy !req
678. I just act like I drankCopy !req
679. or something. I don't...Copy !req
680. Ignorant.Copy !req
681. God, dog!Copy !req
682. Huh!Copy !req
683. Wanda!Copy !req
684. What's wrong, baby?Copy !req
685. Come here.Copy !req
686. Bernie, you all right?Copy !req
687. No, I ain't all right.Copy !req
688. I almost brokeCopy !req
689. my doggone neckCopy !req
690. because you got a millionCopy !req
691. pair of shoes up in here.Copy !req
692. Why you got so many shoes?Copy !req
693. You only got two feet.Copy !req
694. Bernie, I'm not goingCopy !req
695. to argue with youCopy !req
696. about these shoes.Copy !req
697. I'm not arguing, Wanda.Copy !req
698. I'm just telling youCopy !req
699. how I feel.Copy !req
700. What's going on?Copy !req
701. Wanda, I can't take it.Copy !req
702. I swear I can't take it.Copy !req
703. I keep biting my tongueCopy !req
704. around these kidsCopy !req
705. I'm going to pop,Copy !req
706. I'm going to lose it.Copy !req
707. I can't be myself,Copy !req
708. I can't be Bernie Mac.Copy !req
709. And if I can't beCopy !req
710. Bernie MacCopy !req
711. this is how it'sCopy !req
712. going to come out.Copy !req
713. Somebody gotCopy !req
714. to pay the price.Copy !req
715. You all I got.Copy !req
716. Can you hold me, baby?Copy !req
717. I'm pitiful, Wanda.Copy !req
718. That's okay, baby.Copy !req
719. Jordan says you gave himCopy !req
720. a threatening look.Copy !req
721. But I'm not goingCopy !req
722. to put that down.Copy !req
723. And Vanessa saysCopy !req
724. that you mumbledCopy !req
725. something incoherently.Copy !req
726. That's not a big deal.Copy !req
727. So it seems like thingsCopy !req
728. have gotten a lot better.Copy !req
729. Yeah, Uncle Bernie's beenCopy !req
730. on excellent behavior.Copy !req
731. His word choiceCopy !req
732. has been phenomenal.Copy !req
733. I learned that.Copy !req
734. Heh, heh, heh.Copy !req
735. Yeah, he's much moreCopy !req
736. pleasant to be around.Copy !req
737. Great. Okay.Copy !req
738. Mr. Mac, you haveCopy !req
739. anything to add?Copy !req
740. Nothing?Copy !req
741. For what, Cooley?Copy !req
742. Anything I say is goingCopy !req
743. to get twisted aroundCopy !req
744. and you're going to writeCopy !req
745. down in that little pad.Copy !req
746. Actually, no.Copy !req
747. Anything that's saidCopy !req
748. within this meetingCopy !req
749. is between usCopy !req
750. and goes no further.Copy !req
751. It's completely confidential.Copy !req
752. Completely confidential?Copy !req
753. Yes, like an attorney-Copy !req
754. client privilege.Copy !req
755. Really?Copy !req
756. Yes.Copy !req
757. So I can say anythingCopy !req
758. I want, right?Copy !req
759. As long as it's withinCopy !req
760. the context of this meeting.Copy !req
761. So I can talk about grabbingCopy !req
762. somebody by the ponytailCopy !req
763. shaking their head tillCopy !req
764. they're damn near dizzyCopy !req
765. till water startCopy !req
766. pouring out their eyesCopy !req
767. you know whatCopy !req
768. I mean, Nessa?Copy !req
769. I can talk aboutCopy !req
770. that, can't I?Copy !req
771. And you, Jordan,Copy !req
772. you know doggone wellCopy !req
773. you're not supposedCopy !req
774. to throw no candy.Copy !req
775. As a matter of fact,Copy !req
776. you're not supposedCopy !req
777. to throw anything.Copy !req
778. I should've put a dentCopy !req
779. in your head the sameCopy !req
780. way you did in my car.Copy !req
781. It's all right for meCopy !req
782. to do that, Cooley?Copy !req
783. And you, baby girl, yeah.Copy !req
784. You're just too cute.Copy !req
785. That's the only wayCopy !req
786. you get away with it.Copy !req
787. But that's not going to last.Copy !req
788. It'll lastCopy !req
789. till you're around six.Copy !req
790. What are you,Copy !req
791. five and three-quarters?Copy !req
792. Yeah, and then you'll beCopy !req
793. right along with them.Copy !req
794. And you know what,Copy !req
795. when you get with themCopy !req
796. POW! Slap allCopy !req
797. three of y'all.Copy !req
798. Boy, I feel so much better,Copy !req
799. Cooley.Copy !req
800. See, the beauty of itCopy !req
801. you all ain't hearCopy !req
802. the real Bernie MacCopy !req
803. two-piece. Pow-pow!Copy !req
804. So you ain't goingCopy !req
805. to see the second oneCopy !req
806. 'cause the first oneCopy !req
807. knocked you out.Copy !req
808. Mr. Mac, I can no longer beCopy !req
809. a party to this abusive tirade.Copy !req
810. No, come on, CooleyCopy !req
811. I can't keepCopy !req
812. watching what I sayCopy !req
813. in front of these kids.Copy !req
814. It's going to comeCopy !req
815. out like this.Copy !req
816. You leave meCopy !req
817. no other choice.Copy !req
818. Jordan, you gotCopy !req
819. one more timeCopy !req
820. to sit at that breakfast tableCopy !req
821. and chew your foodCopy !req
822. with your mouth openCopy !req
823. breathing through your nose.Copy !req
824. I'm going to give you a jabCopy !req
825. in the bread basket.Copy !req
826. I swear that'll clear upCopy !req
827. your sinuses.Copy !req
828. Oh, Mr. Mac.Copy !req
829. No, you not there,Copy !req
830. Cooley.Copy !req
831. You don't see himCopy !req
832. every morning—Copy !req
833. This has got to stop.Copy !req
834. This has been going onCopy !req
835. for over an hour.Copy !req
836. Look here, CooleyCopy !req
837. I'm just startingCopy !req
838. to enjoy myself.Copy !req
839. I ask you, you goingCopy !req
840. to come tomorrow?Copy !req
841. I wasn't planning to.Copy !req
842. Well, come on, hey, kidsCopy !req
843. don't y'all want to seeCopy !req
844. Brad Cooley tomorrow?Copy !req
845. Say yeah.Copy !req
846. Please, Mr. Cooley,Copy !req
847. make him stop.Copy !req
848. Very good, Mr. Mac.Copy !req
849. Very good.Copy !req
850. Bernie Mac is back, baby.Copy !req
851. I can say what I want again.Copy !req
852. Well, for the most part.Copy !req
853. But you knowCopy !req
854. what I'm talking about.Copy !req
855. Life is good, America.Copy !req
856. Life is good.Copy !req
857. These kids taking meCopy !req
858. through all that.Copy !req
859. They're just a pain in the ass.Copy !req
860. That's what they are, America,Copy !req
861. just a pain in the ass.Copy !req
862. Y'all got kids, you know.Copy !req
863. I just deal with mine up front.Copy !req
864. I don't go behind the curtain,Copy !req
865. you know.Copy !req
866. Just a pain in the ass.Copy !req
867. Ooh, every time you knowCopy !req
868. it's a kid around.Copy !req
869. When your booty start hurting,Copy !req
870. it's a kid around.Copy !req
871. A kid is close.Copy !req
872. Ooh, my booty hurt.Copy !req
873. It's a kid somewhere.Copy !req
874. Ow!Copy !req
875. It's children.Copy !req
876. Bryana, what did youCopy !req
877. just say Billy was?Copy !req
878. I said BillyCopy !req
879. was a pain the...Copy !req
880. Ass?Copy !req
881. I understand, baby.Copy !req
882. We should watchCopy !req
883. what we say in frontCopy !req
884. of Bryana though.Copy !req
885. Honestly, baby, I didn'tCopy !req
886. know she was over there.Copy !req
887. I didn't mean nothing by it.Copy !req
888. She over there eavesdropping.Copy !req
889. Honey, I thinkCopy !req
890. it's more than that.Copy !req
891. You know, when it was justCopy !req
892. you and me in the houseCopy !req
893. certain thingsCopy !req
894. we could doCopy !req
895. certain thingsCopy !req
896. we could say.Copy !req
897. But we have a houseCopy !req
898. full of kids where...Copy !req
899. Cut!Copy !req
900. Did you pay the bill?Copy !req
901. Captioned byCopy !req
902. Media Access Group at WGBHCopy !req