1. You think
you're good at walking?
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2. Yes.
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3. You're
good at walking?
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4. I bet I can walk
circles around you.
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5. I bet you can.
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6. Fantastic.
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7. I'm fantastic.
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8. I'm so fantastic I can walk
circles around you, literally.
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9. Literally.
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10. I bet I can walk
circles around you.
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11. Okay.
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12. Oh, fast.
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13. Mwah.
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14. I bet I can walk
circles around you.
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15. No!
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16. No!
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17. I need this!
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18. I need this!
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19. Yes, I would like to order a
big bouquet of pretty flowers.
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20. Hey, where have you been?
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21. Hey, come in.
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22. Oh, you're late.
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23. What are you wearing?
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24. You wore that to your wedding,
are you kidding me?
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25. I know he's late.
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26. I—
Ugh, here.
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27. Do you have the ring?
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28. Do you, Herbie Johnson, take
this lovely wife to be your
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29. lawfully wedded wife?
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30. Money okay?
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31. Yeah, it's your
wedding day, man.
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32. You're supposed to be happy.
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33. Come on, come on back.
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34. You can't back out now.
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35. Come on, she's
lovely, look at her.
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36. Don't cry.
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37. You made her cry.
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38. Don't cry.
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39. What are you doing?
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40. Hey, come here.
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41. Ah, he's a stupid deadbeat
anyway.
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42. Who needs him?
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43. And zoom, the panda ate
the sheriff's brains
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44. with a pair of chopsticks
and was crowned the
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45. most beautiful animal
in the whole room.
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46. The end.
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47. My autobiography is finally
finished.
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48. Time to cool off.
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49. No!
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50. Aah, all my hard work!
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51. My hard work!
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52. I gotta start from scratch.
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53. "The Andy Milonakis Story."
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54. Ooh.
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55. Ah.
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56. I must find this boy.
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57. Uh...
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58. Hi.
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59. I'm a big-time publisher.
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60. Are you Andy Milonakis?
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61. Yes.
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62. Your book was brilliant!
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63. Oh, thanks.
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64. Oh!
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65. Why did you do that?
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66. Because I don't accept
unsolicited materials!
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67. But Unsolicited Materials
is the name of
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68. my autobiography and
you requested it.
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69. Ahh.
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70. Ah, I miss you.
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71. Oh, run, it's a monster.
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72. What are you doing?
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73. Where?
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74. Run, fast, fast.
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75. Where?
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76. It's Godzilla.
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77. Where are you pointing?
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78. I don't see
where you're pointing.
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79. What are you doing?
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80. Get away.
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81. What are you looking at?
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82. You get away now.
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83. You get away now, boy.
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84. You get away now, boy.
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85. Get away, it's a monster.
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86. Still don't see it.
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87. Ow.
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88. I feel better now.
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89. This looks way too hot.
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90. Ralphie, can you test this to
make sure it's not too hot?
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91. Just fine, Andy.
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92. Thank you.
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93. Ugh.
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94. Ralphie, can you test this apple
to see if it's rotten?
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95. Andy, this
apple's mad rotten.
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96. Now what
am I gonna eat, huh?
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97. Andy, I miss my family.
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98. Can I go home soon?
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99. What, you don't like
living in my closet and testing
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100. things for me?
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101. Huh? Huh?
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102. I kidnapped you fair and square.
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103. Now test this battery and tell
me if there's any juice left.
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104. Ahh. Ahh. Ahh.
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105. Yeah, it's good.
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106. This article
is so depressing.
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107. What's so
depressing about it?
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108. It's about
the homeless.
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109. It's horrible.
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110. Sometime all I wish is
that I could be homeless.
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111. Who would ever
wish for homelessness?
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112. Living with homes
can be a nightmare.
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113. Ew, that's gross.
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114. Oh, that's Billy's house.
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115. Can Billy come out and play?
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116. Hey, don't touch my homes.
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117. Sorry.
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118. It's:
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119. Starring:
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120. And a:
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121. I could spend all day looking
at this handsome devil.
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122. Your face looks like God himself
carved it from expensive marble
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123. and sent it down to Earth on the
back of a magical luck dragon.
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124. If the whole world looked as
good as you, there would be
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125. no more wars.
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126. In fact, the pure beauty that
emitted from your porcelain
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127. complexion would cure all
disease and famine as well.
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128. I love you.
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129. I said, "The freakin'
apartment is on fire!"
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130. Stop looking at yourself in the
mirror, and start panicking
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131. with the rest of us.
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132. Friggin' jerk.
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133. I'll be back for you later.
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134. Free samples.
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135. Have some free samples.
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136. Okay.
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137. Take a bite.
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138. Good.
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139. Yeah.
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140. You know, you just ate
the last unicorn's heart.
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141. Uh-oh.
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142. Can I have one?
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143. That's
one, that's good.
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144. You just ate the joy of
about 10,000 kids.
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145. Now they're all sad,
they're crying.
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146. Tastes good though, kind of, to
be mean like that, right?
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147. It's yummy.
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148. Have some free samples.
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149. Oh, yeah.
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150. Hey, thanks.
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151. You know what that is?
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152. Uh-uh.
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153. You just ate the
ability of a young pigeon.
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154. Now it can't coo.
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155. Coo.
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156. I killed him?
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157. It can't coo no more.
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158. Duh, that's not the way
you grow a palm tree.
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159. I'm not trying to grow
a palm tree, Ralphie.
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160. I'm hiding my coconuts from
you, you fat bitch.
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161. I resemble that remark.
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162. Hi, I'd like to make
a delivery order please.
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163. Come inside, please.
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164. Hey, come inside, thanks.
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165. What are you doing, man?
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166. Let me see this.
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167. What happened?
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168. They didn't like it?
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169. Oh, they didn't like it?
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170. Here, fix this one.
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171. Didn't you use the black
truffles?
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172. Why didn't he like the food?
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173. Yeah, why is that?
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174. How was
table five doing?
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175. Were they doing okay?
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176. Make it better.
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177. Make it better.
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178. Make it better.
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179. Why didn't he like the food?
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180. We put the rat feces in.
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181. We put the pig's blood in.
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182. We put the imported truffles in.
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183. Why didn't he like it?
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184. Get out!
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185. Shut up!
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186. Shut up?
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187. Oh,
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188. Going—
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189. Shut up!
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190. Shut up!
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191. Ugh, come on, stupid remote.
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192. Ugh.
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193. Rifka, can you turn the TV on
for me please?
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194. Okay, Andy.
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195. Thanks, Rifka.
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196. That'll be 50¢.
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197. Let me out of here.
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198. Get me out of this
stinkin' thing that
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199. I'm not really stuck in.
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200. Get me out of this stupid thing.
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201. This is stupid.
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202. You're all stupid.
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203. Our plan worked.
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204. Now we can really get down.
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205. Yee-haw!
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206. Well, I don't know, I mean—
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207. Yeah, I want to go to the park,
but I mean, I do have some
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208. things to do today.
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209. All right.
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210. Yeah well, maybe I'll meet you
later then.
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211. Okay.
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212. All right.
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213. Okay, bye.
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214. Hey, Ralphie.
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215. What you got there?
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216. I found it in the closet.
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217. It's a bag of pleasure.
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218. Well, open 'er up.
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219. Okay, okay.
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220. Ah-la-la-la-la-la.
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221. I don't get it.
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222. Let me try.
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223. La-la-la-la-la.
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224. Ah-la-la-la-la-la.
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225. Ah-la-la-la-la-la.
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226. Wow, this
really is pleasure.
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227. Ha-ha-ha-ha.
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228. Pleasure is pleasant.
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229. Ah-la-la-la-la.
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230. Oh, my head.
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231. Where's my pleasure?
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232. Where's my pleasure?
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233. Andy, give me back my pleasure.
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234. Andy, give me back my pleasure.
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235. Andy, give me back my pleasure.
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236. Ooh.
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237. Andy, no!
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238. Aah!
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239. Can I help you with your TPS
reports, Mr. Gilson?
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240. Bah!
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241. We-de-de-de-de-de.
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242. Blue chips.
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243. Can I interest you in
some blue chips?
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244. A-ling-ling-ling-ling-ling.
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245. Remember kids, never mix
business with pleasure.
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246. Got to go to the bank
and open some accounts.
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247. Yay-woo-bop-boo.
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248. Ah.
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249. Ah.
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250. Ah. Ah. Ah.
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251. It's so good though.
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252. Ahh!
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253. What?
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254. Stop judging me, machine!
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255. Are you sick and tired of
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256. animal attack videos that are
boring and wimpy?
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257. Yes!
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258. Don't you wish you could buy
an animal attack video that was
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259. gross, brutal, and disgusting?
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260. I sure do.
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261. Then do I have the animal
attack video for you.
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262. When Andy Attacksis the most
gruesome and shocking video
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263. you'll ever see.
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264. Watch Andy attack a lamp.
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265. Watch Andy attack a TV.
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266. Watch Andy attack a couch.
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267. So for only 17 relatively large
payments of—
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268. Help me, announcer, I
can't breathe.
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269. I can't help you, Andy.
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270. The voiceover was pre-recorded
ten years ago.
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271. I'm probably retired by now.
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272. So buy When Andy Attackstoday.
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273. It'll probably be the
last one ever.
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274. I mean, it will be the last one
ever.
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275. Buy it!
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276. Buy it!
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277. Mmm.
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278. Hey dude, you wanna
help me fold my sheet?
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279. All right, but
only if you let me
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280. criticize everything you do.
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281. You got yourself a
deal, lady.
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282. Don't wrinkle it!
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283. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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284. "Yeah, yeah, yeah."
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285. Here!
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286. Good.
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287. You walk at an abnormal clip.
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288. Your shoes have shoddy
construction.
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289. You have terrible taste in
bedroom decor.
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290. Your draperies contain 0%
imagination.
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291. You hold your head crooked when
you watch the set.
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292. Your ear's got a
pink tinge to it.
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293. The fella that cuts your hair
rushes the job.
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294. I get the point.
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295. Stop nitpicking.
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296. Why are you even here?
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297. Leave me alone!
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298. Just leave me alone!
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299. You got guts, kid,
and I'm proud of you.
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300. Bow Wow, despite
previous warnings,
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301. you have continued to behave
in a cool and awesome manner.
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302. You are hereby sentenced to
hang out with Andy Milonakis
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303. so that you learn to
be lame like us.
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304. Come on, man,
anything but this dude.
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305. Yeah!
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306. Beam him in.
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307. Wow, Bow-Wow, we're gonna be,
like, awesome friends, right?
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308. Make him eat lame food
that isn't good.
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309. All
righty-dighty-do, here we go.
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310. Aw, man, I'm not eatin' that.
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311. Look at that, man, it's Spam
and colored marshmallows
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312. and trees and—
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313. Make him play lame games that
aren't good either.
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314. I got the neato-ist
video games ever.
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315. A'ight, cool.
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316. Okay, I got Silently
Reading to Yourself Part 2,
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317. Mellow Marbles, and
Carrot Peeler Daytona.
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318. I just got 10,000
points on that.
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319. Which one you wanna play?
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320. Them aren't
even video games, dawg.
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321. They're VHS tapes.
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322. Stupid!
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323. Aah!
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324. Come on, bud, relax.
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325. Stupid.
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326. Dude, chill, hey—
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327. Oh, I do
have one cool thing.
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328. Dang, man, what is that, man?
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329. I don't know, it's a
cool toy I found.
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330. I call it "Bark-bark."
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331. I have no idea why.
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332. No, the evil ones have
returned, and it's all that
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333. Milonakis kid's fault.
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334. Just for that I'm going to blow
up the world for some reason.
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