1. What's the point of cleaning
under the bed?
It's like cleaning a dumpster!Copy !req
2. It's designed to be filthy!
Because this room smells
like dog burp.Copy !req
3. Ugh!
What is this?
Oh.Copy !req
4. That's a glass of milk.
Cheese — t-that's a glass ofCopy !req
5. cheese.
Aah!Copy !req
6. Stone — that's a
glass of stone.Copy !req
7. Are you kidding me?
That milk had to be at least 10
years old.Copy !req
8. Well, at least
there's nothing alive under
there.Copy !req
9. Aah!Copy !req
10. Ehh.
Darwin I?Copy !req
11. So that's where you were hiding.
Wait.Copy !req
12. I thought you said that Darwin I
left to live a happier life on a
farm with other fishes.Copy !req
13. He did.
Uh... He did.Copy !req
14. Uhhh...
Hey!
Look what I found!Copy !req
15. The game you made.
Hey, gum, I'm not 3
anymore.Copy !req
16. You're not gonna distract me
with — what the what?Copy !req
17. Dodj or daar.
It's calling us.
No!Copy !req
18. We swore we'd never play that
game again!Copy !req
19. We have to destroy
that game.Copy !req
20. Wait!
don't throw the dice!Copy !req
21. You don't know what you're
doing!
Yeah, 'cause you didn'tCopy !req
22. write any instructions.
And what you did write
is spelled wrong.Copy !req
23. "Dodj or daar"?
Sounds like an alien choosing a
baby name.Copy !req
24. Let's just pack it away.
No! You can't stop!
Once you start dodj or daar...Copy !req
25. It has to be
finished.Copy !req
26. Okay, so, the rules are pretty
simple.
You roll the dice, then take aCopy !req
27. daar card.
If you do the daar, then you
move forward that many spaces.Copy !req
28. If you don't, then you have to
take a dodj card and move half
the spaces.Copy !req
29. Okay.
And how do you win?
YouCopy !req
30. don't win.
You survive.
O... Kay.Copy !req
31. But how do you actually win?
Oh.
You have to roll an exact numberCopy !req
32. to land on the last square.
Dad, you're up.Copy !req
33. I feel sorry for whoever's got
to do this one.Copy !req
34. Officer, please!
I need to report a theft!Copy !req
35. Yes! Finally!
What did the thief look like?
Well, he was wearing aCopy !req
36. monocle.
Uh-huh. Uh —
o... Kay.Copy !req
37. Uh... Anything else?
Yes — he had a big,
furry mustache.Copy !req
38. Uh-huh, big furry musta—
okay.
Any other distinguishingCopy !req
39. features?
Yes — he was dressed as
a yodeler.Copy !req
40. Aren't you gonna write that
down?
Just testing something.Copy !req
41. Yaaah!
And what did that man steal?Copy !req
42. A kiss.
You actually did it?Copy !req
43. Oh, yeah.
That's how it always starts —Copy !req
44. with the laughing and the daars,
and then later...
The horror and fear!Copy !req
45. My go!
Hm.
"Order a prank pizza."Copy !req
46. Uh-huh.
And what's the address?Copy !req
47. 420 grove street.
Oh, and could you add some
Turkey gizzards?Copy !req
48. As well as the ice cream,
pig's foot, and oysters?
Yes, I-it's an oldCopy !req
49. family recipe I-invented by my
grandfather...
Old Joe windypants!Copy !req
50. Oh, man.
I wish I could be there to seeCopy !req
51. that pizza arrive.
Okay, 420 grove street.
Here we go.Copy !req
52. Pizza guy!
What are you talking about?
I sell pizzas.Copy !req
53. Why would I buy one?
Well, someone's gotta pay for
this.Copy !req
54. I'm not paying for something I
didn't order!
What am I supposed to do withCopy !req
55. this now?
Give it to me! I'll show ya!
Hyah!Copy !req
56. I think all these jobs areCopy !req
57. messing with my head.
I'm now
wearing...Copy !req
58. Everything...
In the house.
Okay.Copy !req
59. Can someone move me forward?
I meant my piece on the —Copy !req
60. So, that's six spaces,
putting you ahead of gumball,Copy !req
61. Darwin, dad, and... Me.
Although, of course,
technically, this card saysCopy !req
62. every "thing" in the house.
I am wearing
everything — even dad'sCopy !req
63. fat-camp girdle!
Every "thing," anais,
not just clothes.Copy !req
64. The couch is a thing.
Are you wearing that?
What?Copy !req
65. Tut-tut-tut-tut!
No arguing, young lady.
You need to learn to be a goodCopy !req
66. loser.
Now take your dodj.
"The floor is now red-hot lava."Copy !req
67. I actually felt that through six
pairs of shoes!
It's starting!Copy !req
68. We have to finish the game
quickly before it gets ahold of
us and destroys us all!Copy !req
69. Dude, keep it
together.Copy !req
70. Get a grip on
yourself!
You're underreacting!Copy !req
71. Thanks, man!
I needed that!
I got a bit calm for a second,Copy !req
72. but now I realize how serious
this is!Copy !req
73. Aaaah!
Daar!
"Run past a dog wearing a suitCopy !req
74. of ham!"
That doesn't sound too bad.
Really?Copy !req
75. don't you remember when I got
that one?Copy !req
76. Waaaaaaah!Copy !req
77. The worst part is,
it took four weeks to stitchCopy !req
78. that suit, and it was gone in
under a minute.Copy !req
79. Um... I'll take a dodj.
"Your left arm must do what theCopy !req
80. player to your right's arm does,
and vice versa."
What does that mean?Copy !req
81. Means I can do this!
Hey!Copy !req
82. Hey!Copy !req
83. Hey!Copy !req
84. Ow!
Daar — "take aCopy !req
85. dodj."
Oh, man!
"C.S.D."Copy !req
86. What's c.S.D.?
Compulsive singing
disorder.Copy !req
87. "Eat 100 hot dogs in
under a minute."
That's not a daar!Copy !req
88. That's Tuesday!Copy !req
89. Ohh...
Wob-wob-wob-wob-wob-wob-wob...
Wobwobwobwobwobwobwobwobwobwob!Copy !req
90. I think he stopped.
Aw, dude!Copy !req
91. He's drinking the brine!
Boys, I'm not using
spray cheese instead ofCopy !req
92. deodorant.
Give me a dodj card.
"From now on, you'll doubt everyCopy !req
93. thought you have."
That's ridiculous.
There's no way a board game canCopy !req
94. make that happen.
Or can it?Copy !req
95. Is that head real?
It's as real as youCopy !req
96. believe it is — until the game
ends.
Maybe now you'reCopy !req
97. that came out way less ominous
than I was hoping for.
Give me the dice.Copy !req
98. Aah!
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!Copy !req
99. Why is it still burning?
We told you —
nothing stops until you finishCopy !req
100. the game.
Well, then I'm finishing
the game right now!Copy !req
101. Or are you?
Every sentence you say is goingCopy !req
102. to start with "or," isn't it?
Or is it?
I'll take that as a yes.Copy !req
103. Or will —
Yes!
It won't make anyCopy !req
104. difference, mom.
The game's too powerful.
The only power this gameCopy !req
105. has is the power you give it.
Then why is my hand
moving again?Copy !req
106. The game's finished,
Richard!
But these pickled eggsCopy !req
107. aren't!Copy !req
108. Ohh!Copy !req
109. Rainbow complaints
office.
How can I help you?Copy !req
110. This sounds like a very simple
problem.Copy !req
111. Or is it?
Zip it, you goblin-faced
lump!Copy !req
112. Oh!
No, sir, of course I wasn'tCopy !req
113. talking to you.
I'm sure you're a very handsome
man.Copy !req
114. Or is he?
don't you think it's
hard enough to deal with idiotsCopy !req
115. all day without you pestering
me, too?Copy !req
116. Oh. Heh. Sorry!
Yes, sir.
I-I suppose some of that wasCopy !req
117. directed at you.
Yes, of course I'll putCopy !req
118. you through to my supervisor.
Or will you?
I'm gonna pop you,Copy !req
119. you —Copy !req
120. And so, in
conclusion, if earth temperatureCopy !req
121. were to rise by just one degree,
average sea levels would rise,
leading to a...Copy !req
122. thought global warming was such
a laughing matter.
Three hours' detention.Copy !req
123. Now, who would like to volunteer
for my outdoor meditation
retreat instead of having aCopy !req
124. summer vacation?
What the —Copy !req
125. Come on.
Oh, very good, Darwin.
And who wants to take the vow ofCopy !req
126. silence, as well?
Come
on!Copy !req
127. You won't regret it.
And finally, we also need aCopy !req
128. volunteer for the eco protest
this weekend where we chain
ourselves to a doomed tree forCopy !req
129. 48 hours.
Are you sure, Darwin?Copy !req
130. I'm not gonna lie to ya, buddy.
We're gonna get
maced.Copy !req
131. Aah!Copy !req
132. We have to finish
the game!
Just roll the cards andCopy !req
133. pick the dice!
Just get on with it!
Okay.Copy !req
134. We need maximum rolls every
turn, which means no dodjes, no
matter how bad the daars are.Copy !req
135. Agreed?
Dodj.
What happened toCopy !req
136. taking every daar?
Do you really want
to see me clean myself with myCopy !req
137. tongue?
Ew!
Dodj! Dodj! Dodj!Copy !req
138. "Dramatic music will
play until the end of the game."Copy !req
139. Daar — "juggle flaming
knives."
Come on, Richard!Copy !req
140. You can do it!Copy !req
141. Never mind!
We'll deal with that later!
"Drive the car from the backCopy !req
142. seat."
I can do it! I can do it!Copy !req
143. Or can you?
Shut up, will you?Copy !req
144. Dodj bomb.
What's that?
♪ everyone, take aCopy !req
145. dodj card! ♪
"Freeze frame."Copy !req
146. Does that mean I'll —
See?
That's what we told you!Copy !req
147. If we all get stuck by a dodj,
we'll remain like this forever!
"Movie earthquake."Copy !req
148. Wh-o-o-o-o-oa!
Wh-o-o-o-o-oa!
"Gravity is your enemy"?Copy !req
149. What does that —
"Giant hands."Copy !req
150. Or are they?
Inverted mermaid!Copy !req
151. Nothing happened.
Well, I'm kind of
that already.Copy !req
152. Fish head... Legs...
Come on! Roll the dice!
"Date a sheep."Copy !req
153. I'll have the lamb.
I meant chicken!Copy !req
154. I meant the check!
Bathtub sle-e-e-dge.
Waaaaaaaaaah!Copy !req
155. We're nearly there!
Now we need to land on the last
square with an exact roll!Copy !req
156. Here we go.
5!
Oh, no! Dodj bomb again!Copy !req
157. "No one is allowed to breathe
until the game is over!"
Or are they?Copy !req
158. Please,
be a 6.Copy !req
159. Are you kidding me?Copy !req
160. Yes! We survived!
All the effects of the game have
been reversed!Copy !req
161. Almost.Copy !req
162. Mom, instead of milk,
can we have chocolate milk?
No.Copy !req
163. Instead of eggs, can
we have chocolate eggs?
No.Copy !req
164. Instead of bread,
can we have chocolate bread?
No!Copy !req
165. Richard, can I get a little help
here, please?Copy !req
166. Sure.
Here, kids.
Stop bothering your mother andCopy !req
167. eat this chocolate.Copy !req
168. What the —
well, what's the point in
dragging us here if we're notCopy !req
169. getting some kind of treat?
Because
we're having a nice familyCopy !req
170. outing, and that should be
reward enough.Copy !req
171. don't you dare.Copy !req
172. Mommy, I
want some chocolate.
I'm sorry,Copy !req
173. little sausage, but you've had
too much candy this week.
Wah, wah, wah,Copy !req
174. blah, blah, blah!
Now all theCopy !req
175. little sausages are punished and
going to have to wait in the
car.Copy !req
176. This is the face
she's gonna get when she comes
back.Copy !req
177. Eh, pretty good, butCopy !req
178. this is how you do a sulky face.
It's all in theCopy !req
179. detail.
Eh, it would be
better if it throbbed.Copy !req
180. No problem.Copy !req
181. I can't believe we
wasted a day at the mall withoutCopy !req
182. getting anything.
You know what we
should do?Copy !req
183. We should make full-sized paper
models of ourselves, set the car
on fire, and push it off a cliffCopy !req
184. to teach mom a lesson.
Uh...
I... Think I have a better,Copy !req
185. less-horrific idea.
Customer announcement — asCopy !req
186. part of our campaign,
huggy bites are offering a
lifetime supply of jelly beansCopy !req
187. to the first man to hug the
blue lady in aisle 3.
Huh?Copy !req
188. Huggy bites — more
love than you can chew.Copy !req
189. No!
Get your hands off her!Copy !req
190. That's my wife!
Whew. Th—Copy !req
191. If anyone should win
those huggy bites, it's me!Copy !req
192. Hey!
What is going on here?Copy !req
193. Please don't tell!
You should be ashamed ofCopy !req
194. yourselves!
What would your poor mother
think about this kind ofCopy !req
195. behavior?
What would it take to
make all this go away?Copy !req
196. 80%-20%.
And throw in some huggy bites,
as well, for tricking me andCopy !req
197. those poor customers.
That's it! I'm telling!Copy !req
198. Mrs. Mom, we came up with this
really clever idea to get candy
behind your back, but Mr. DadCopy !req
199. caught us, and now he wants a
cut of it.
And... It's back to the car.Copy !req
200. "Your
children deserve a better
example!"Copy !req
201. "You need to grow up!"
"don't forget your appointment
at the cardiologist!"Copy !req
202. Boring!
Ha! Discipline.
I'm not a punisher — I'm aCopy !req
203. fun... Isher!
And she's not the boss of me!
Have you ever toldCopy !req
204. her this?
Yeah! Lots of times!
In my head.Copy !req
205. What about to her
face?
Nah, kid.Copy !req
206. She'd snap me like a twig.
Okay, I think we
need to work on this.Copy !req
207. Let's go through it one last
time!
Who are you?Copy !req
208. I'm the man!
And what does a man
do?Copy !req
209. Whatever the heck he
wants!
And why?Copy !req
210. Because I'm a beautiful,
powerful animal!
Then let me hear youCopy !req
211. roar!
Now suck that gutCopy !req
212. in!
Clench those pecs!Copy !req
213. Uh...
And how do you feel?Copy !req
214. Man-tastic!
Good!
Now go and get us some candy!Copy !req
215. Hey, woman!
You're gonna listen to me, andCopy !req
216. you're gonna listen good!
I'm calling the shots now!Copy !req
217. Hey!
You listen to the man when he's
talking!Copy !req
218. I've got an idea!
All right, let'sCopy !req
219. hear it.
Supermarkets are
designed to sell you stuff youCopy !req
220. didn't even know you wanted.
Everything counts.
Hm!Copy !req
221. From the height of the
product to what it's placed next
to.Copy !req
222. Huh.
I want a cheese sandwich!
The music isCopy !req
223. important, too.
But more than anything, you wantCopy !req
224. to make them think it's a
bargain.
Ahh!Copy !req
225. You paranoid nutbar.
That stuff doesn't work.
Then why are youCopy !req
226. holding a basketful of lipstick?
Three colors — $5.
It'd be stupid not to buy it.Copy !req
227. This... Is... Perfect!
If we use those tricks on mom,
we can get anything we want!Copy !req
228. Excuse me, madam, but maybe
you'd like to try —
Maybe what?Copy !req
229. Maybe you know better about
disciplining my family than I
do?Copy !req
230. Maybe I shouldn't be screaming
like a lunatic in the mall?
No, no, no, no, no!Copy !req
231. I just thought maybe you'd be
interested in a —
What?Copy !req
232. free relaxing massage on
aisle 13?
Well, maybe I am!Copy !req
233. Thank you for the kind offer!Copy !req
234. Oh, yeah.
After the day I've had, that'sCopy !req
235. just what I needed —Copy !req
236. I can't move!
What did you do?
Can you undo what you just did?Copy !req
237. Uh... Actually, I — I need to
go speak to my manager, 'cause I
normally work on the deliCopy !req
238. counter, and I...
I gotta go!
What?Copy !req
239. You can't leave me like this!
Huh?Copy !req
240. Why aren't you in the car?
Well, here's the
thing — we've all been throughCopy !req
241. a lot today, and...
I was thinking —
wouldn't it be better if youCopy !req
242. just bought us a treat from the
supermarket?
Never!Copy !req
243. Hmm. I see.
Then how about...
A free makeover session?Copy !req
244. No!
No!
Not the eyebrows!Copy !req
245. It's nothing
personal, mom!
It's just business.Copy !req
246. Rrrrrrrrrrrrrr— unh!Copy !req
247. I can't believe it ended up like
this!
A whole afternoonCopy !req
248. wasted!
The important thing
is, we tried —Copy !req
249. No!
It's not over!
There's one more thing we canCopy !req
250. do, but you have to do exactly
what I say.
I-I —Copy !req
251. Come on, son! Eat it!
I just can't take
stuff without paying for it!Copy !req
252. I've been raised too well.
Oh, come on!Copy !req
253. It's not that difficult!
You open the bag, you eat the
candy...Copy !req
254. You put the bag back where it
was, and no one will ever know.Copy !req
255. Let me get this
straight.Copy !req
256. I asked you to finally step up
as a father and set a good
example for your children, andCopy !req
257. the way you interpreted that was
to take them shoplifting?Copy !req
258. That's it.
I think you've all done it.Copy !req
259. You've finally pushed me over.Copy !req
260. Over what?
The limit!Copy !req
261. Does that mean we can
get a candy bar?Copy !req
262. You need to...Copy !req
263. Run!
Now!
What's wrong withCopy !req
264. mom?
That's not your mother
anymore!Copy !req
265. It's a whirlwind of fury!
Get out of the way!Copy !req
266. She's out of control!Copy !req
267. Whoa!Copy !req
268. Gumball!
I don't want the
candy anymore!Copy !req
269. Huh?
Aah!Copy !req
270. Watch out, dad!
It's you she wants!Copy !req
271. Somebody please help me!
Freeze, ma'am!Copy !req
272. Please — don't make me do
this.Copy !req
273. Wh-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oa...Copy !req
274. Aaaaaaaaaaah!
I wasn't trained for this.Copy !req
275. Please — somebody help me.
You need help?
Yes, please. Please!Copy !req
276. I'd do anything!Copy !req
277. Aaah!Copy !req
278. Aaaaah!
Aaaaaaaaa...Copy !req
279. Aaaaaaaaah!
Free samples here!Copy !req
280. Ooh!
Aah!Copy !req
281. Hyah!
Huh.Copy !req
282. Aah! I'm finished!
Take flight, Mr. Dad!Copy !req
283. Dad, can I have someCopy !req
284. candy?
Sure, son.
Just don't tell your mother.Copy !req
285. Richa-a-a-a-a-a-rd!
Dad, stop sweating!Copy !req
286. You're gonna give it away!
Easy for you to say!Copy !req
287. It's not you she's after!Copy !req
288. Darwin, anais! Now!Copy !req
289. Sorry, mom.
We just need you to cool downCopy !req
290. for a minute.
Yeah.
What kind of example are youCopy !req
291. giving the kids?Copy !req
292. Oh... My... Gosh.Copy !req
293. What am I doing?
I am so sorry.
I completely overreacted.Copy !req
294. What kind of mother am I?
No!
It was me!Copy !req
295. What kind of father am I?
A fat man-child!
A chubby Peter Pan!Copy !req
296. We didn't respect your
authority, mom.
We know you're only doing it forCopy !req
297. our own good.
And when a parent
says "no," they mean "no."Copy !req
298. I hope you can forgive us.Copy !req
299. Of course, sweetie.
Every child tests the limit from
time to time, and most husbandsCopy !req
300. do that all the time.
Let's go home. I'm exhausted.Copy !req
301. Has she gone?
Depends.
Do you have what you promised?Copy !req
302. Thanks.
Thank you.
Thanks.Copy !req
303. Please — never come back.Copy !req