The Amazing World of Gumball 2x17

1. Quick! We have to get dressed, eat

2. breakfast, and get to school on time, or mom's gonna kick our butts!

3. Good thing I slept in my clothes!

4. Hey! Those are my clothes!

5. No time to change! You put on mine! Dude! Wait up!

6. I can't walk here! Whoa! Aaaah!

7. Huh. That worked out better than I expected.

8. You're wasting time! We have to go faster!

9. Spread the toothpaste on the toast, put the cartoons on fast-forward, and give me a milk

10. shower!

11. Aw. Yay!

12. Dude, it's Saturday. [ Beethoven's "ode to joy" plays ]

13. Yes, dad is looking

14. after us.

15. I was hoping you'd do that.

16. I love hanging out at the mall with Mr. Dad. I know, right?

17. You stay in your pajamas, eat junk food all day, and get anything you ask for.

18. It's like a really trashy Christmas. Hey, dad, can I

19. have 20 bucks to get my eyebrow pierced? First I need to ask you

20. one question, young man — are you ready for the responsibility of how awesomely cool this is

21. going to make you? Yes, father. I am. Then take this $20, and

22. may radness illuminate your path. Uh, are you seriously letting

23. your child get one of his eyebrows pierced? You're right.

24. Take $40. Do both — that's much cooler. Thanks, dad.

25. Come on, Harold. Let's go. Harold!

26. Dad! Can we get this tape? Why?

27. To fix stuff. But nothing's broken. Yeah, but Darwin also

28. wants to get this hammer. I'm not buying you a hammer.

29. Until we've tested how much fun it's gonna be first!

30. Wait. Aren't we gonna have to pay for all this?

31. We don't have to. They're free samples. Oh!

32. Whooooooo! Whooooooo! Where's your piercing?

33. I got the anti-wrinkle injections instead. Really?

34. Bah!

35. Whooooo! I'm bored now. Let's go home. What about the

36. groceries?

37. Hey! That's my shopping! Oh, I'm sorry. Did you pay for this?

38. Uh... No. Then it's not yours, is it?

39. Eh — eh — eh — eh — oh. Boop... Boop... Boop...

40. Boooop! Whooooooo!

41. Whooooooo! Hey! You can't do that!

42. Of course we can! Everything is allowed with my dad!

43. Ooh! ♪ I pick up ham and chocolate chips and stick them

44. in the bread ♪ Ooh! ♪ it need a little

45. sauce, I say maple and red ♪ Boom! Dude, have you

46. noticed that your voice has changed? What, you mean how I

47. sound like a man and you squeal like a piglet on helium? You take that back!

48. Sure, when you ask me like a man.

49. I am a man! Really?

50. 'Cause right now, you sound like a mouse whose parachute won't open.

51. [ Shouting increases in pitch ]

52. You have won this antique crystal decanter worth over ten-thous—

53. Ugh! Okay! Okay! I take it back! Man, my ears are still ringing!

54. Lord watterson, the word on the streets of elmore is that yours is a house with no rules.

55. I humbly request asylum in your palace of freedom. What?

56. Everyone in elmore is talking about how

57. laid-back you guys are. Can I hang out at your house? I'm not allowed to be myself at

58. home. I hereby Grant thee thy fairest

59. and most cherished wish. What? That

60. means yes.

61. I'm starting to see why your family won't let you be yourself.

62. I like touching things. To be honest, I'm more annoyed with the others.

63. Turn it up! This house is

64. great! Normally, I'm not allowed to shout!

65. I work in the library, you see? Yeah, they don't judge here, which is great, 'cause usually

66. judges don't like me. Finally! A place where I'm not pressured

67. by society to be beautiful. You don't look that different.

68. I haven't taken off my makeup yet. Ahh!

69. How about you? I just came here 'cause people don't like it when I'm

70. naked. You know that was only covering your back, right?

71. Ye-a-a-a-ah. Mmm! Oh, yeah!

72. Oh! Oh! Oh, oh, oh, oh! I thought you were some kind of vegetarian eco-warrior.

73. Only so I can get that rush of superiority from making other people feel guilty.

74. Hey, dude. I hope you don't mind, but I've invited a few friends to the

75. party. Uh, before we open that door, please define "a

76. few." Like... A bunch. And by that, you

77. mean... You know — some. Give me a ballpark

78. I'm sure that's fine. Whoa!

79. We need to talk. You're too nice, dad.

80. It was fun when it was just the three of us abusing how easygoing you are, but this has

81. gone too far. Hey! Go poke yourself! Gumball is right.

82. You need to show some authority and tell these people to go. We learned a lesson today.

83. Freedom is a beautiful thing, but too much of it I— hold on a second.

84. And stop poking pe— blah! You need to learn how

85. to be less cool. Practice on gumball. Hey, dad.

86. Can I have a flare gun? Remember — you have to say no.

87. Mrralo! Brlig nah! Hnnnnnngh-um mugh br-br-br!

88. Heyaaah yehberberal! Yoiyoiyoi hngnknknk! Yoioioioi!

89. Hargh br-br-br-br ah-ah! Yoiyoiyoiyoi brbrbrbr! I think we can

90. safely say it's not in his nature to say no.

91. Aah!

92. Hey! Those are my clothes! Not anymore!

93. Everybody, stop! I said stop!

94. Stop! Shut up! The kid has something to say!

95. Thank you. Now, what I wanted to say —

96. pay attention, everyone! This might be important!

97. Uh, as I was saying — listen closely! He's about to speak!

98. I just want to s— any minute now!

99. Do you mind? Okay, I know it's — sorry!

100. I know it feels great to be allowed to do whatever you want.

101. Until now, I hated rules, like all of you. Freedom is beautiful, but the

102. problem is, with too much freedom — this little tyrant is trying

103. to steal our freedom!

104. You can't throw us out!

105. This is our house! Not anymore! That's it!

106. I'm calling the police! Hi, police? Gumball watterson calling.

107. A bunch of people just stole our house and won't let us in! Sorry!

108. I can't hear you! I'm at a party at the wattersons' house!

109. You should come! There's no rules here!

110. It seems the police won't be of much help.

111. Come on, dad! Go and get our house back!

112. I'm gonna do this! I'm gonna run through that door! I am not a bunny!

113. I am a cannonb-a-a-a-a-a-a-all! Who am I kidding?

114. That's a solid-oak front door. It's like trying to break a tree with my face.

115. Half an hour of heavy breathing and pep-talking for this?

116. Just use me as a ram, guys. Aaaaaaaaaaaah!

117. This is all my fault! It's because I have no

118. authority. If I wasn't such an lenient slacker, none of this would have

119. happened!

120. Yeah, that's true. Uh-huh. Yep.

121. Aw, come on! You're supposed to say, "No, dad!

122. We're all responsible!" Then we would hug, and I would feel less

123. guilty! Hmm... Nah. This one's definitely on you.

124. What the what? Oh, oh, ohhh!

125. Oh, oh, ohhh! Hello, sir? I would like to order 2,000

126. pizzas, please. Hey! Give that back!

127. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah— I just don't have it in me. Hold on.

128. I think that guy gave me an idea.

129. Here's your receipt. Uh... You can keep it.

130. Humph! Hnngh! Huunnnnnnnnnnngh!

131. Please allow us —

132. Uhh! Me! Please let me help you with

133. that. Wait a minute — how come

134. this is so heavy? These boxes are empty.

135. Surprise! In your sausage face!

136. We're getting our house back, thrashing-style! Come on! Be cool, man!

137. Please let us hang out. Well, I suppose since you're asking nicely —

138. Mm. But I'll have to say nuh.

139. I'll have to say nnnuuuh! I'll have to say n-nnnuuuuuuh —

140. I'll have to say no! A man's house is his castle, and

141. this is my house! My castle! So get out of here!

142. Get out of my house! Or what? Mnh...

143. I don't understand.

144. We did everything right. Yeah, you turned responsible and showed some

145. backbone. I don't get it. Hmm.

146. Something's missing — some kind of ruthless ruler. Yeah.

147. A wrathful divinity that could crush this joyful chaos with one hit from its iron fist.

148. Someone like —

149. You're going to clean this place until it looks

150. better than when you arrived. Then you will leave and never come back.

151. Or what?

152. Oh, Nigel! Oh, hello, miss simian. Here's that cup of pig sweat

153. you asked for. Mmm! My favorite! Now, I've been meaning to

154. talk to you about how very ugly you are. Oh, really?

155. I used to think that you were just regular ugly, but now that I'm up this close, I see that

156. you're full-on mega-gross. Makes me want to kiss you. Mwah! Mmm!

157. You taste like garbage quiche. I'm sorry. I didn't catch that.

158. I was distracted by your rancid breath. So long, sucker!

159. "Chim-pan-see you later."

160. Oh. Let's do those guys. He

161. was an ordinary guy who was never good at anything until he found out he could...

162. Jump! I've already lost your brother to jumping!

163. I am not gonna lose you! Boom! He had all of the talent, but

164. none of the discipline. I'm just a kid from lower east elmore.

165. I don't know nothin' about jumpin'. Then don't jump, kid.

166. Just push the world away. "Jump" — coming soon to a

167. playground near you. Rated pg-13. Would you guys quit it?

168. You're throwing me off my game! Well, excuse us for trying to add some drama to your

169. life.

170. Pff.

171. "A wicked chicken wrote a check for a wall?" Bzzh.

172. You, uh, "licked the bricks you didn't fix"?

173. Okay, I'll try and say this politely, but you're

174. gonna need to read between the lines. Due to personal circumstances, I

175. am unable to commit sufficient resources to resolve this communication problem.

176. Hey! Show some understanding! He's doing his best to

177. communicate. That... Just sounded

178. like you said you were running from the butt police.

179. I think we need to find out what he wants before he chokes on his tape.

180. Too late.

181. Okay, I'm gonna use the online translator. So, what language do you speak?

182. Come on. At least make an effort to speak to him in a way he can

183. understand. What... Language... Do you speak?

184. Uhp! Please try and articulate this time.

185. I'm gonna type that the way I heard it.

186. Elmore search says, "do you need medical help?"

187. I'm tempted to say yes. Gumball, you're not being very constructive.

188. What... Country... Do you come from? don't worry.

189. I got this. "What country do boom-box-heads come from?"

190. Gumball! Uh, uh, what my ignorant friend here is trying to say is,

191. "where do bi-speakered, parallelepipedic electrical leisure appliances come from?"

192. Ugh. You make it sound like a disease.

193. Ah! Boomboxenburg. Home.

194. That's right — home, where you have over 500 different words for "disco."

195. But only discovered fire in 1992.

196. Oh, don't blame me. Blame your cavemen.

197. Of course. Why didn't we think of that? You can just write what you want

198. to say. what the —

199. Pbht! Dude, you need to type words,

200. not cockroach noises. hmm.

201. There's no direct translation for this in English. But it will translate into

202. French, which will translate into Spanish, which will translate into Japanese, which

203. will translate in Swahili, then Chinese, then Indian, Portuguese, Danish, and then

204. back to English. Simple.

205. "The reign of the ape is no more"?

206. Miss simian's retired! Oh! Oh!

207. And you've won this amazing new car!

208. Elmore wings — we might not have the legroom, but there's plenty of seats.

209. The majestic cheetah — fastest land mammal on earth, capable of speeds of up to —

210. Aah! I think I've finally watched too

211. much TV! Maybe I should read a book. "Chapter 1 — gumball and Darwin

212. ran through the living room, screaming"?

213. Simian's retired!

214. School's over! Number one — I have not

215. retired! And number two — if I was retiring, you'd still have to go

216. to school! And what are you doing out here?

217. Um, I felt sure it was a fire drill, and, uh, I was gonna...

218. All you kids back inside! You hear me? Good job, watterson.

219. Curse word. Why would anyone think I was

220. retiring? Well, you are kind of old. And bald.

221. Bald? Not bald, my petal. It's just, gravity has turned

222. your hair... Into a beard. I've got a beard? Hmm.

223. The only honorable way out of this is to turn my embarrassment into anger.

224. Detention for both of you!

225. That's the last time I try and help —

226. What's that? Little Timmy fell down the well?

227. No?

228. You found the treasure, and now we can save the town from the evil contractors?

229. No? Then I suggest you go to the

230. library and learn some English, dude, 'cause I'm officially giving up on you.

231. you know, I speak a little "beatbox." Of course you do.

232. I bet you learned it while parachuting carbon-neutral aid parcels to orphan polar bears.

233. Uh, no. I just learned some because I

234. wanted to make juke feel welcome in our school.

235. What did you say? I asked the way to the beach

236. and "how much is this taco?" What? I don't know.

237. It's the only words I know how to say. But I think he kept saying

238. "grobblefest." Grobblefest? What does that mean?

239. Well, I could try and ask —

240. Principal brown! I'm sorry. What? No, no. I'm —

241. Oh. That's what happens when you

242. mess with static.

243. Uh, uh, uh, oh, no! No, no, no! Nooooooooo!

244. I'm sorry, dude, but I don't understand what you

245. want. Bye.

246. Stay!

247. Ah!

248. Apparently, grobblefest is this huge coming-of-age ritual that's been celebrated by his country

249. for generations. If it's so big, how come I

250. haven't heard of it? Uh, mount Everest? Huh?

251. The Atlantic ocean? W-what? Thursday?

252. You can make up as many words as you like, but it's not gonna prove whatever point

253. you're trying to make. But this is what juke's been wanting us to do the

254. whole time — celebrate grobblefest! It's really important to his

255. people. It's a ritual about becoming a man.

256. They love it! It makes them feel like this.

257. Yeah, well, this is how much I care.

258. What is wrong with you? You called juke a boom-box-head,

259. you insulted his culture, and when he asked you for some help and understanding, you tie him

260. up to a pipe like a dog. You know what you are? You're a bad friend, like this

261. guy! Okay, buddy. I gotcha.

262. Aw... You're right. I've been a thunder jerk! But don't worry — I'm gonna

263. overcompensate for my guilt in the most extreme way possible. Darwin, print out those

264. coming-of-age rituals. I'm gonna throw juke the most hard-core grobblefest there's

265. ever been! Okay, dude, it's time to swim the lake of boyhood and

266. emerge... A man. Happy grobblefest!

267. You should be ashamed!

268. What? This is what I read on the Internet.

269. Besides, we got the stick. We can pull him out any time. It's not that — it's

270. because you're just doing this out of guilt! Wha—

271. why else are you supposed to help people?

272. Hold this for me, buddy. Look, you help someone because you have to show the right

273. example to people. So, that's what it's all about, huh?

274. Feeling superior! It's not about feeling superior — it's about

275. doing the right thing. Well, you might want to pull him out, then.

276. Aaaaaaaaah! Help! Help! Help! Help! Help!

277. Help! Help! Come on, now, buddy — second part of the

278. ritual! Time to be a man! You don't want to be a

279. come on, man! You can do it! Eat it! Eat it!

280. Come on, you can do it, buddy! You're almost there! Has it occurred to

281. you that maybe you got this wrong? Has it occurred to

282. you that you might hurt your neck looking down on people all the time?

283. This is the best I can do. You're welcome to go to the zoo and steal a crocodile if you

284. really want to do it by the book. Come on, dude! Man up!

285. All right! I'll show you. What's so hard about this?

286. Mm.

287. You know, if you think about it, a cow is better than a squirrel. I mean, it's a pretty powerful

288. animal. If you had the strength of a cow, that'd be pretty hard-core.

289. Okay, now that your soul is cleansed and your body is full of the sacred power of the

290. cheeseburger, it is time... For the ritual grobblefight!

291. This is pathetic. What? This is perfect!

292. It's just as good as a sword and shield and bow and arrow. It's all there in spirit.

293. Okay, let's get started. 3... 2...

294. 1... Grobblefight!

295. You're making a mockery of his culture —

296. hmph! Ptoo!

297. Come on! Make an effort! It's for juke! You still don't get

298. it, do you? Oh, I get it, all right!

299. You're a finger-pointer, and now I'm doing the right thing, you can't point your pointy little

300. flipper at me anymore, and that's why you're so butt-hurt! But the truth is, I'm actually

301. doing something, and you're not helping at all! I am helping!

302. Ow! Right in the...

303. The switch. You finally flicked the switch!

304. I've been trying to explain this for two years! My arms are too short to reach

305. it! Guys! Guys! You can stop fighting.

306. I appreciate the effort, but I have no idea what this grobblefest thing is.

307. Boomboxenburg is a continent. There's more than one country, you know — scratchistan,

308. lipsembourg, rapvia, the Democratic Republic of rhythm — Be quiet, juke!

309. We're trying to help you! Yeah, but you're just helping in a half-baked way to

310. feel better about yourself! Hang on! We're both trying to do good

311. here! There's no reason to be fighting!

312. I agree! I'm sorry for making you feel bad!

313. And I'm sorry for fighting with you! Well, you could stop

314. slapping me, then. Well, at least we

315. made someone happy today. Happy grobblefest,

316. dude! Oh, no! Guys, guys! Wait!

317. Look at that. You try and help people, and

318. that's what you get.