1. Hello, camera person!Copy !req
2. Waiter of Amanda, please!Copy !req
3. Who are you?Copy !req
4. My name is Penelope Tate.Copy !req
5. I'm Amanda's number one fan, please!Copy !req
6. I have my own Amanda website,
www.amandaplease.com.Copy !req
7. That's nice, but I got work to do.Copy !req
8. Stay!Copy !req
9. Have you ever met Amanda?Copy !req
10. Sure, lots of times.Copy !req
11. Amanda gave me this.Copy !req
12. That looks like the actual gavel Amanda
uses when she plays Judge Schroody!Copy !req
13. That's right.Copy !req
14. That prop is a piece
of television history!Copy !req
15. Give it... Hey, clams off!Copy !req
16. This is mine.Copy !req
17. You get your own prop.Copy !req
18. I must have a prop
from the Amanda show!Copy !req
19. That's it, please!Copy !req
20. I must have the A which
symbolizes a man, please!Copy !req
21. Here I come, A!Copy !req
22. You'll soon be mine!Copy !req
23. Mother, the A is mine!Copy !req
24. I'd better get my A out of here!Copy !req
25. Please!Copy !req
26. Boring!Copy !req
27. Look at that shine!Copy !req
28. Bye!Copy !req
29. Hey!Copy !req
30. Like, like!Copy !req
31. Shaboom!Copy !req
32. Howdy, actors!Copy !req
33. Gimme!Copy !req
34. See ya!Copy !req
35. Hammer time!Copy !req
36. Shaboom!Copy !req
37. Cool guy!Copy !req
38. Love ya, Dan!Copy !req
39. Hey!Copy !req
40. NowCopy !req
41. we have a freakishly good
show for you guys tonight!Copy !req
42. You guys are gonna
get to see a lot of...Copy !req
43. We're wearing the same dress!Copy !req
44. I know, this is really...Copy !req
45. Embarrassing!Copy !req
46. I know.Copy !req
47. Maybe we should go... Amanda!Copy !req
48. Wait!Copy !req
49. No!Copy !req
50. I was watching the
show on the monitor.Copy !req
51. I can't believe we are
wearing the same dress!Copy !req
52. Neither can I!Copy !req
53. What are the odds?Copy !req
54. Hey, Amanda Joyner!Copy !req
55. You guys, we gotta check
with each other before theCopy !req
56. show so we don't wind up
wearing the same thing.Copy !req
57. No, look!Copy !req
58. No, this can't be happening!Copy !req
59. Not the cameraman too!Copy !req
60. Okay, we're all gonna change.Copy !req
61. Stick around!Copy !req
62. We'll be back in a second!Copy !req
63. Have you kids finished your homework?Copy !req
64. Not yet, Mom.Copy !req
65. Can't we watch TV?Copy !req
66. Not until your homework's finished!Copy !req
67. I don't wanna do homework!Copy !req
68. Who does?Copy !req
69. Hey, let's call Homework Hut!Copy !req
70. Homework Hut!Copy !req
71. Homework Hut!Copy !req
72. Yeah!Copy !req
73. Homework Hut!Copy !req
74. Hi!Copy !req
75. And how would you like that?Copy !req
76. Make it a B plus?Copy !req
77. Alright!Copy !req
78. Anything else with that?Copy !req
79. I need a paper on Abraham Lincoln,
500 words, and make it an A minus.Copy !req
80. Yeah!Copy !req
81. No problem!Copy !req
82. We'll have your homework
there in 30 minutes or less!Copy !req
83. Alright!Copy !req
84. Alright!Copy !req
85. Here's your homework!Copy !req
86. Thanks, Homework Hut guys!Copy !req
87. Alright!Copy !req
88. Kids?Copy !req
89. Did you get your homework done?Copy !req
90. We sure did!Copy !req
91. Homework Hut!Copy !req
92. 30 minutes or less,
or your next A is free!Copy !req
93. Alright!Copy !req
94. And then you let go...Copy !req
95. Hi there!Copy !req
96. Hello!Copy !req
97. I'd like to order some soup.Copy !req
98. We're no longer a soup restaurant!Copy !req
99. We realized that soup
really wasn't our thing!Copy !req
100. Now we sell sushi!Copy !req
101. That's right!Copy !req
102. We're Sushi People!Copy !req
103. Okay, I'll try some sushi!Copy !req
104. Great!Copy !req
105. Here you go!Copy !req
106. Hey!Copy !req
107. What?Copy !req
108. Well, I guess you didn't know
that sushi was raw fish on rice!Copy !req
109. Well, I know what sushi is,
but that fish is still wiggling!Copy !req
110. Yep, our sushi is very fresh!Copy !req
111. Your sushi is alive!Copy !req
112. Alive!Copy !req
113. I'llCopy !req
114. finish her sushi!Copy !req
115. Don't fret, baby!Copy !req
116. I guess some people just
don't appreciate fresh sushi!Copy !req
117. Hey there!Copy !req
118. Ohayo!Copy !req
119. Ohayo!Copy !req
120. Ohayo!Copy !req
121. Welcome to Sushi Dooper!Copy !req
122. What kind of sushi would you like?Copy !req
123. I'll have a tuna roll.Copy !req
124. We don't have that,
but we have other rolls!Copy !req
125. We have fingernail roll!Copy !req
126. Raccoon roll!Copy !req
127. We have thumbtack roll!Copy !req
128. Thumbtack roll?Copy !req
129. Grandpa wants thumbtack roll!Copy !req
130. What'd you say?Copy !req
131. What's happening?Copy !req
132. We need a thumbtack roll,
you crazy old man!Copy !req
133. Watch your mouth, boy!Copy !req
134. I'm not too old to
show you what's what!Copy !req
135. Tuna roll!Copy !req
136. You old prune!Copy !req
137. Hey!Copy !req
138. Hey, hey, come on!Copy !req
139. What kind of sushi restaurant is this?Copy !req
140. There's no such thing as a
thumbtack roll, that's dangerous!Copy !req
141. Well, you could try another roll!Copy !req
142. We have phlegm roll!Copy !req
143. Phlegm?Copy !req
144. Hairball roll?Copy !req
145. You're a failure!Copy !req
146. Get off my back!Copy !req
147. What are you going to do about it,
failure boy?Copy !req
148. Come on, you old coot!Copy !req
149. Daddy!Copy !req
150. Look, you people don't know the
first thing about sushi, do you?Copy !req
151. Do ya?Copy !req
152. The young man's right!Copy !req
153. I know!Copy !req
154. We're not sushi people!Copy !req
155. Daddy, the Japanese!Copy !req
156. Cheese!Copy !req
157. Come on, don't cry.Copy !req
158. I'm sure there's something
here that's good.Copy !req
159. Well, you could try our samurai roll!Copy !req
160. Well, okay.Copy !req
161. Hey!Copy !req
162. One samurai roll coming up!Copy !req
163. Here ya go!Copy !req
164. This is good,
but why do you call it a samurai roll?Copy !req
165. Get it!Copy !req
166. Get it!Copy !req
167. People are nuts!Copy !req
168. Crazy!Copy !req
169. Crazy!Copy !req
170. Daddy?Copy !req
171. Of course, pumpkin.Copy !req
172. I think he really enjoyed himself.Copy !req
173. So we really are sushi people?Copy !req
174. I think so, baby.Copy !req
175. I think so.Copy !req
176. I'm out of pills!Copy !req
177. Spare me, old man!Copy !req
178. Failure!Copy !req
179. Hey, whatcha got, Dad?Copy !req
180. New TV set!Copy !req
181. Enjoy!Copy !req
182. New TV!Copy !req
183. Let's turn it on!Copy !req
184. And Kobe Beef has the ball.Copy !req
185. He passes it left and...Copy !req
186. That ball's going flying
right out of bounds!Copy !req
187. And during the wintertime,
these pigeons will fly south.Copy !req
188. See?Copy !req
189. Look at those pigeons fly!Copy !req
190. Yeah!Copy !req
191. And Tiger Berkowitz with a
long shot to the fairway.Copy !req
192. Here comes the swing and...Copy !req
193. And the firemen are still trying
to put out the fire, which is hot.Copy !req
194. They're spraying the
water now with a hose.Copy !req
195. My goodness!Copy !req
196. It seems a tornado
has hit the Southland!Copy !req
197. And it's not just a
little bitty tornado.Copy !req
198. It's a big tornado!Copy !req
199. Come here.Copy !req
200. The television bandit has struck
in neighborhoods all over the city.Copy !req
201. This bandit has stolen over
300 television sets thus far.Copy !req
202. So please be on the lookout
for this television thief!Copy !req
203. I'm the bandit.Copy !req
204. Howdy, bandit.Copy !req
205. I'm gonna steal your TV.Copy !req
206. Say, what happened to our new TV set?Copy !req
207. Dad, get a job.Copy !req
208. Kyle, sit.Copy !req
209. What's up, dude?Copy !req
210. Kyle, I have asked you a thousand
times to please not call me dude.Copy !req
211. Sorry, dude.Copy !req
212. I mean, Dude.Copy !req
213. I mean... Please be quiet, Kyle.Copy !req
214. I want to talk to you
about your book report.Copy !req
215. Okay.Copy !req
216. Do you remember what
your book report's about?Copy !req
217. A book?Copy !req
218. I'll remind you.Copy !req
219. Charlotte's Web by Kyle Rostenson.Copy !req
220. I wrote Charlotte's Web?Copy !req
221. No, you wrote the report!Copy !req
222. I knew I wrote something.Copy !req
223. Yes, and here's what you wrote.Copy !req
224. Charlotte was a spider dude.Copy !req
225. She, like, had a web.Copy !req
226. Spiders are totally rad.Copy !req
227. I like spiders.Copy !req
228. I also like donuts.Copy !req
229. No way!Copy !req
230. I love donuts, too!Copy !req
231. Obviously!Copy !req
232. Totally!Copy !req
233. Stop saying that!Copy !req
234. Hey, you want to play some Frisbee?Copy !req
235. Look, smiley, smiley!Copy !req
236. No!Copy !req
237. Kyle,
I just don't know what to do with you.Copy !req
238. That's why I've called
your parents here today.Copy !req
239. Mr. and Mrs. Rostenson!Copy !req
240. Hello.Copy !req
241. Please take a seat.Copy !req
242. It's nice to see you.Copy !req
243. Now, Mr. and Mrs. Rostenson,
I am very disappointed in Kyle's work.Copy !req
244. No way!Copy !req
245. Kyle, that is, like, so bogus, dude!Copy !req
246. Totally!Copy !req
247. Dude, I don't know why she's tripping.Copy !req
248. I did my report.Copy !req
249. You did?Copy !req
250. Did you, like, hand it in?Copy !req
251. Yeah, like, totally.Copy !req
252. So, like, what's her deal?Copy !req
253. Yeah, what's your deal?Copy !req
254. Well, perhaps Kyle should
read his book report to you.Copy !req
255. Okay, like, give it.Copy !req
256. Charlotte was a spider dude.Copy !req
257. She, like, had a web.Copy !req
258. Spiders are totally rad.Copy !req
259. I like spiders.Copy !req
260. I used to like donuts.Copy !req
261. Yeah, donuts are rad.Copy !req
262. Donuts rock!Copy !req
263. I know, dude.Copy !req
264. I don't know what her deal is.Copy !req
265. Yeah, like, what's your deal?Copy !req
266. Yeah, what's your deal?Copy !req
267. My deal?Copy !req
268. Mr. Rostenson, don't you think there's
something a little wrong with his book report?Copy !req
269. Okay, dude, I admit it.Copy !req
270. I helped him write it.Copy !req
271. You helped him?Copy !req
272. Okay, like,
I wrote the whole thing, okay?Copy !req
273. This is pathetic.Copy !req
274. I don't know what to do here.Copy !req
275. Hey, we could go get some donuts.Copy !req
276. I don't want any donuts.Copy !req
277. You wanna play frisbee?Copy !req
278. Smiley, smiley.Copy !req
279. No, I hate frisbee and I hate donuts.Copy !req
280. What is her deal?Copy !req
281. Yeah, what is her deal?Copy !req
282. What's your deal?Copy !req
283. There is no deal.Copy !req
284. Well, like, dude,
we can't hang out here all day.Copy !req
285. Yeah, like, my parents are in the car.Copy !req
286. No way, come on, clap for her.Copy !req
287. Jerry!Copy !req
288. What's taking so long, dude?Copy !req
289. Can we, like, go or what?Copy !req
290. Yeah, like, we've been sitting in the
van for, like, half an hour, dude.Copy !req
291. Time!Copy !req
292. Sorry, we gotta split.Copy !req
293. Fine!Copy !req
294. Split!Copy !req
295. Go eat donuts!Copy !req
296. Say totally!Copy !req
297. See if I care!Copy !req
298. What's her deal?Copy !req
299. What is her deal?Copy !req
300. I don't know what her deal is.Copy !req
301. Yeah, what's her deal?Copy !req
302. What's her deal?Copy !req
303. What was her deal?Copy !req
304. What was her deal?Copy !req
305. I don't know what her deal was.Copy !req
306. Yeah, like, what was her deal?Copy !req
307. What was her deal?Copy !req
308. What was her deal?Copy !req
309. What's your deal?Copy !req
310. It's time for a He's Billing moment!Copy !req
311. Hey, hey, no, no!Copy !req
312. He's liar!Copy !req
313. He's monster!Copy !req
314. He's monster!Copy !req
315. I'm gonna hit you in the
head with that he's monster!Copy !req
316. That's good news!Copy !req
317. Hurry, taxi driver!Copy !req
318. I must get this A to my house, please!Copy !req
319. I'm telling you, kid,
it ain't gonna fit.Copy !req
320. Couldn't you have stolen an L
or maybe something lower case?Copy !req
321. There's no I in Amanda, please!Copy !req
322. Who is this Amanda?Copy !req
323. Who is Amanda?Copy !req
324. What are you, some kind of communist?Copy !req
325. Do you own a television, please?Copy !req
326. I thought as much.Copy !req
327. I will teach you the joys of
a man with my laptop computer.Copy !req
328. It hangs from my neck.Copy !req
329. I have them all on my neck.Copy !req
330. While I speak, view my website.Copy !req
331. It's www.amandaplease.com.Copy !req
332. Here, you see the homepage,
which I update frequently, please.Copy !req
333. This week, I am featuring a special new
clickable called the Dancing Lobster Gang.Copy !req
334. Click, please.Copy !req
335. Look at this freakish lobster dance.Copy !req
336. He's clearly got the music in him.Copy !req
337. If you visit www.amandaplease.com,
you can create memes.Copy !req
338. That website is impressive.Copy !req
339. It's excellent.Copy !req
340. Hey, where do you think
you're going with that big A?Copy !req
341. Wait!Copy !req
342. How did you do that?Copy !req
343. Never you mind.Copy !req
344. He'll be unconscious for
eight minutes, please.Copy !req
345. Now, put that in your trunk.Copy !req
346. It ain't gonna fit, kid.Copy !req
347. Very well.Copy !req
348. You stay here.Copy !req
349. I'll go fetch my bike.Copy !req
350. I'll be back, please.Copy !req
351. Bike?Copy !req
352. One time, I, like, woke up one morning,
and my hair was, like, all messy.Copy !req
353. So, like, I combed it,
but it was still messy.Copy !req
354. So, I used, like, a brush on me.Copy !req
355. But afterwards, it was still messy.Copy !req
356. So, I, like, put on a hat.Copy !req
357. That was totally cut!Copy !req
358. Excuse me.Copy !req
359. Hello.Copy !req
360. The Snipatorium welcomes your head.Copy !req
361. Do you do haircuts for guys here?Copy !req
362. The hairs of boys?Copy !req
363. Of course!Copy !req
364. And we have for you the best hairstyling
woman in the universe, Bernice.Copy !req
365. Bernice!Copy !req
366. Yeah, honey, you're cool!Copy !req
367. Can you snip away the
hairs of this gentle boy?Copy !req
368. Yeah, yeah, honey, come over here.Copy !req
369. Are you sure you have
enough time to cut my hair?Copy !req
370. For a cute monkey face like this,
make time, of course!Copy !req
371. Let me want Madam Gorgeous
over there for a shampoo.Copy !req
372. Sit down, handsome.Copy !req
373. Okay, lean back there, toots.Copy !req
374. Let me soak that precious
little head of yours.Copy !req
375. Bernice, darling,
the phone she rings sweetly for you.Copy !req
376. Whee!Copy !req
377. Yeah, this is Bernice.Copy !req
378. Who wants to know?Copy !req
379. It's you,
you adorable slab of manliness, you!Copy !req
380. Bernice, there is no hair on my chest!Copy !req
381. Okay, look, I'm on a call here,
can't you see me talking?Copy !req
382. Sorry, you're a zombie,
you're terrible!Copy !req
383. Why, I could eat you like yogurt!Copy !req
384. Plain complaint or get off.Copy !req
385. Gotta go, cupcake,Copy !req
386. Bernice, can I get a towel,
a squeegee, or something?Copy !req
387. Look, sweetheart,
talk less and shampoo yourself.Copy !req
388. Okay, sweet lumps,
how are those nails looking?Copy !req
389. Well, I think they're dry,
but they're kind of stuck to the tray.Copy !req
390. I got you covered, pancakes.Copy !req
391. Look at my nails!Copy !req
392. They're gorgeous!Copy !req
393. Gorgeous, gorgeous!Copy !req
394. Bernice!Copy !req
395. Okay, honey cheeks, let's get to it.Copy !req
396. Hey, what a shrub!Copy !req
397. Hey, hey, you got your
lollipop stuck in my hair!Copy !req
398. Don't worry, sweet cakes,
I got another one.Copy !req
399. Hello!Copy !req
400. Bernice, am I dry yet?Copy !req
401. I don't know, sweetie, let's check.Copy !req
402. You look pretty as a pickle!Copy !req
403. I do?Copy !req
404. Yes.Copy !req
405. Who's pretty like broccoli?Copy !req
406. You are, you are!Copy !req
407. I'm drooling!Copy !req
408. Bernice, I got soap in my eyes!Copy !req
409. On my way, chocolate cake,
here, bend over!Copy !req
410. Yeah, now that I can breathe!Copy !req
411. Good, I think you're getting a zit!Copy !req
412. Where?Copy !req
413. You ready there, butterball?Copy !req
414. You know, you seem so busy and
everything, why don't I just...Copy !req
415. Hold still, bubby,
I got work to do here!Copy !req
416. Yeah, but you know,
I think my appendix justCopy !req
417. exploded,
so why don't I just come back and...Copy !req
418. Sorry, cuteness,
I nipped you a little bit.Copy !req
419. Well, I can't... what?Copy !req
420. I can't hear you.Copy !req
421. Actually, I like it,
it helps shape your face!Copy !req
422. What?Copy !req
423. Hey, that's my ear, give it!Copy !req
424. Look at your head!Copy !req
425. Bernice, you're a genius, genius!Copy !req
426. Now, give me $400, please, boy.Copy !req
427. What?Copy !req
428. Hey, sex!Copy !req
429. Young boy, you forget your ear!Copy !req
430. Hello?Copy !req
431. Hello?Copy !req
432. What do we do with this one?Copy !req
433. Let's put it with the others.Copy !req
434. I told you I don't like children!Copy !req
435. Hello?Copy !req
436. Yes, this is the Lumina
Lumina Farm Company.Copy !req
437. Well, hello,
Lumina Lumina Farm Company.Copy !req
438. Why have you called me?Copy !req
439. What time do you want your,
zebras delivered?Copy !req
440. Zebras?Copy !req
441. I didn't order any zebras.Copy !req
442. They're black and white, sir.Copy !req
443. Well, I know their color scheme,
but I don't want any.Copy !req
444. Who do you want to speak to?Copy !req
445. What color is the hair on your foot?Copy !req
446. Well, I believe my foot hair
is a lovely brownish color,Copy !req
447. but what happened to our
discussion of the zebras?Copy !req
448. Quick, lick the phone!Copy !req
449. Pardon?Copy !req
450. Lick the phone!Copy !req
451. There, I've licked it,
but why did I do it?Copy !req
452. How did it taste, sir?Copy !req
453. Well, it tasted phone-flavored.Copy !req
454. But who do you want to talk to?Copy !req
455. Thank you.Copy !req
456. Thank me?Copy !req
457. But I've done nothing thank-worthy.Copy !req
458. You have the wrong number!Copy !req
459. May I take your order, sir?Copy !req
460. Order?Copy !req
461. You have the wrong number!Copy !req
462. Would you like some more spaghetti?Copy !req
463. Spaghetti?Copy !req
464. I can't digest the noodle!Copy !req
465. You have the wrong number!Copy !req
466. Please count to 10,000.Copy !req
467. 10,000?Copy !req
468. I'm not going to count to 10,000!Copy !req
469. One, two, three,
you have the wrong number!Copy !req
470. Four, five,
the number you've dialed is wrong!Copy !req
471. Six, seven, my dog hates me!Copy !req
472. Eight, nine, I'm afraid of my bathtub!Copy !req
473. Ten...Copy !req
474. Man, the show's about over,
but I still have a lot of energy left.Copy !req
475. Hey, I know,
you guys want to play tennis?Copy !req
476. Yeah!Copy !req
477. Thank you.Copy !req
478. You guys have rackets?Copy !req
479. Yeah!Copy !req
480. Okay, ready?Copy !req
481. Thanks for coming to our show.Copy !req
482. I've got to go to the White
House and meet the President!Copy !req
483. See ya!Copy !req
484. Hey, what happened to my neck?Copy !req
485. Hey!Copy !req