1. Summer's almost over.Copy !req
2. They gave me everything,
and now they're taking it all away.Copy !req
3. - Who's they?
- I don't know!Copy !req
4. School.Copy !req
5. Son of a bitch.Copy !req
6. I haven't even started my summer reading,
so I'm reading one line from each book.Copy !req
7. "Big Brother is watching you."Copy !req
8. Okay. So it's about a perv. Next.Copy !req
9. Hang on, there's a lot to love
about starting a new school year.Copy !req
10. New homerooms,
the smell of fresh textbooks,Copy !req
11. getting up early to learn.Copy !req
12. Boo!Copy !req
13. Hey! Go easy on her.Copy !req
14. School is cool.Copy !req
15. I mean, we learn stuff,
and there's lockers, and…Copy !req
16. I'm sorry, babe. My heart's not in it.Copy !req
17. "Once you stop learning, you start dying."Copy !req
18. You know who said that? Einstein.Copy !req
19. - Einstein the bear?
- I'm done.Copy !req
20. I am so screwed.Copy !req
21. I was supposed to be working out
all summer for football. But instead,Copy !req
22. I didn't.Copy !req
23. Bro, come to my gym. I'll get you ripped.Copy !req
24. Here, check it out.Copy !req
25. It's like a snake ate a big rat,
and it hasn't digested it yet.Copy !req
26. I want snake arms. Let's do this.Copy !req
27. Sweet.Copy !req
28. Oh, since it's your last weekend,
I traded shifts at workCopy !req
29. so we can spend tomorrow together.Copy !req
30. I wanna take you
to my special place in the woods.Copy !req
31. And that was the last time
anyone saw her alive.Copy !req
32. No, for a picnic.Copy !req
33. I want to show you this overlook
with an amazing view.Copy !req
34. That's so romantic.Copy !req
35. There's this rock up there,
and it looks like two people doin' it.Copy !req
36. They call it the bone stone.Copy !req
37. Slightly less romantic…
But I can't wait.Copy !req
38. See you tomorrow.Copy !req
39. What the hell? You're blowing me off?Copy !req
40. We're supposed to sneak
into the country club tomorrow.Copy !req
41. Oh crap. I totally blanked.Copy !req
42. But Jay's right.
It's our last Saturday together.Copy !req
43. Dude, but it's our
last Saturday together too.Copy !req
44. A bunch of rich people put up a fence
to keep us out?Copy !req
45. Screw them. They're not better than us.
Right, Ozzie?Copy !req
46. I mean…Copy !req
47. No. I'll cancel with Jay.Copy !req
48. Nice.Copy !req
49. The revolution starts tomorrow.Copy !req
50. I'm gonna go see if my mom can drive us.Copy !req
51. So you're canceling
the romantic picnic with snake arms?Copy !req
52. Um…Copy !req
53. - You're gonna ditch your best friend?
- Ehh…Copy !req
54. You're a dirty double-booker!Copy !req
55. I don't know what else to do,
but I think I can make it work, right?Copy !req
56. I mean…Copy !req
57. - One, two, three, four!Copy !req
58. Hello, Wisconsin!Copy !req
59. Are you finished with the finance section?Copy !req
60. Why are you here?Copy !req
61. I can't be in the basement anymore.Copy !req
62. Those kids are idiots.Copy !req
63. I like you!Copy !req
64. Okay, 3:00 p.m., great. I will be there.Copy !req
65. Red, that was Penny McFadden.Copy !req
66. Penny McFadden?Copy !req
67. Yeah!Copy !req
68. I have no idea who that is.Copy !req
69. From the high school.Copy !req
70. Their school nurse didn't know
she was pregnant,Copy !req
71. and just had her baby in the LensCrafters.Copy !req
72. Eww!Copy !req
73. That's where I get my contacts.Copy !req
74. Well, she is taking
an extended maternity leave,Copy !req
75. and I have an interview tomorrow
to replace her.Copy !req
76. Kitty, why would you
want to go back to work?Copy !req
77. You know what's there, don't you?Copy !req
78. Work.Copy !req
79. Leia will be leaving soon, and I really
enjoyed being around the kids.Copy !req
80. Yeah, but you're forgetting about the part
where there's some jerk thereCopy !req
81. bossing you around.Copy !req
82. By the way, I could use a refill.Copy !req
83. Don't listen to him.
I think it's a great idea, Mrs. Forman.Copy !req
84. I don't like you anymore.Copy !req
85. Think about it.Copy !req
86. You haven't worked in years.Copy !req
87. You've gotten older and slower and softer.Copy !req
88. Uh-huh?Copy !req
89. You might need another refill.Copy !req
90. How long have you been married?Copy !req
91. 'Cause that was a rookie mistake.Copy !req
92. Bro.Copy !req
93. Are you ready to shred?Copy !req
94. Call me a block of mozzarella
and grate me over a pizza.Copy !req
95. That's what I'm talking about.Copy !req
96. - Bro!
- Bro!Copy !req
97. - Bro!
- Let's go!Copy !req
98. Let's go!Copy !req
99. You are so sweet
to help me with my résumé.Copy !req
100. Some people are not so supportive.Copy !req
101. Oh, I meant "softer" in a good way!Copy !req
102. You know, like an old pillow.Copy !req
103. I got it.Copy !req
104. - Okay, tell me about your last job.
- I was a head nurse.Copy !req
105. Perfect. Do you have any references?Copy !req
106. Oh, my bosses all loved me.Copy !req
107. But they are dead.Copy !req
108. Come on, slowpoke.
Don't make me have to carry you.Copy !req
109. Wait, hang on.Copy !req
110. Look at the way
the sunlight is hitting those branches.Copy !req
111. Nature can be so overwhelming.Copy !req
112. Cool. Clocked it. Moving on.Copy !req
113. Hey.Copy !req
114. What's the rush? We've got all day.Copy !req
115. About that, um…Copy !req
116. I didn't want to tell you this,
but I might have to leave a little early.Copy !req
117. - Why? Do you have something else to do?
- No, no, it's just, um…Copy !req
118. I want to start getting back
on Chicago time before I move home.Copy !req
119. - Isn't it the same time there?
- No. It's… It's way different.Copy !req
120. Because of the, um…
the gravitational pull of the lake.Copy !req
121. That makes sense.Copy !req
122. Those lakes are doing
more than we think they're doing.Copy !req
123. Yeah. So are we almost there?Copy !req
124. Uh…Copy !req
125. - Actually, I'm kinda turned around.
- So, what, we're lost?Copy !req
126. Wait, are we lost?Copy !req
127. No. No, no, no. I think we're close.Copy !req
128. Here, let me ask this guy if he knows.Copy !req
129. Excuse me?Copy !req
130. Do you know
where we can find the overlook?Copy !req
131. Yeah, you've got to find
the under-look, okay?Copy !req
132. And it's right above that.Copy !req
133. Wait, Leo?Copy !req
134. Good guess!Copy !req
135. Okay, let me try.Copy !req
136. Patricia?Copy !req
137. Yes. Patricia.Copy !req
138. I knew it.Copy !req
139. Um, but the overlook is up this way?Copy !req
140. Yeah, yeah. Just around the corner, man.Copy !req
141. Thanks.Copy !req
142. Wait, wait, wait!Copy !req
143. If you stand here, you can see
the very tip of the bone stone.Copy !req
144. Uh-huh.Copy !req
145. I am so sore.Copy !req
146. It took me 20 minutes
to get up your driveway.Copy !req
147. Why did you think you can do an entire
summer's worth of workouts in one day?Copy !req
148. He never thinks ahead.Copy !req
149. Now he's so sore
he can't even use a toilet.Copy !req
150. You're making me sound pathetic.Copy !req
151. I can use it.Copy !req
152. I just can't get up.Copy !req
153. Those cookies look good.Copy !req
154. Here.Copy !req
155. Now go downstairs. We're busy.Copy !req
156. Thanks, babe.Copy !req
157. You know what would help you, honey?Copy !req
158. Rub some Bengay on it.Copy !req
159. I use it on my shoulder when I go too hard
on a big bowl of scrambled eggs.Copy !req
160. Oh jeez.Copy !req
161. Maybe Red was right.Copy !req
162. If I get sore making breakfast,Copy !req
163. how can I keep up with
a bunch of high school kids?Copy !req
164. Grandma. I got a little paper cut
in math class.Copy !req
165. Oh, honey, let me get you a Band-Aid.Copy !req
166. Mrs. Forman, I'm having a problem
with my eye. It fell out.Copy !req
167. Oh dear. How did that happen?Copy !req
168. It's a long story. Do you really feel like
we have time for that?Copy !req
169. This paper cut's a gusher!Copy !req
170. Oh! Put… Put pressure on it!Copy !req
171. I need this kidney transferred
into my body before sixth period.Copy !req
172. Surgery?Copy !req
173. She's having a baby now!
She was gonna go to the hospital,Copy !req
174. but I said,
"No, let the school nurse handle it."Copy !req
175. - What do I do?
- Don't push!Copy !req
176. I pushed!Copy !req
177. I told you, you were in over your head.Copy !req
178. Wah!Copy !req
179. Wah! Wah!Copy !req
180. That could all happen.Copy !req
181. Hey, Mrs. Forman.Copy !req
182. Holy smokes! How cute are the two of you?Copy !req
183. You look like you just
came out of The Great Gatsby.Copy !req
184. I read a line from that book today.Copy !req
185. Where's Leia? We're supposed to hang out.Copy !req
186. Oh, she's not back yet.
She went on a picnic with Jay.Copy !req
187. She's with Jay?Copy !req
188. - Can you believe this?
- Yeah, she told me.Copy !req
189. Ozzie!Copy !req
190. A part of me thought
she could pull it off.Copy !req
191. The same foolish part of me that believedCopy !req
192. that Madonna and Dennis Rodman
would be together forever.Copy !req
193. Whatever. Tell Leia she can bite me.Copy !req
194. Okay, I'm just…
I'm gonna put my own spin on it.Copy !req
195. Hey! Be careful!Copy !req
196. Are you still here?Copy !req
197. Jay, why are we stopping?Copy !req
198. We have no idea where we are.Copy !req
199. I know.Copy !req
200. Let's just take a break
and have our picnic.Copy !req
201. Then I can start
working on the signal fire.Copy !req
202. A signal fire?
I was supposed to be done with you by now.Copy !req
203. Done with me?Copy !req
204. All right, you've been acting weird
since we got here.Copy !req
205. Is it 'cause I cried
when I saw that butterfly?Copy !req
206. The truth is, I…Copy !req
207. I made plans with Gwen today too.Copy !req
208. You're a dirty double-booker!Copy !req
209. I know. I'm not proud.Copy !req
210. Leia, you should have just told me.Copy !req
211. I mean, I know I don't let anyone
touch my hair,Copy !req
212. but other than that, I'm not unreasonable.Copy !req
213. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have lied. I…Copy !req
214. I didn't want to disappoint you,
and I didn't want to disappoint Gwen.Copy !req
215. - I messed up.
- And what about Chicago?Copy !req
216. It's the same time zone.Copy !req
217. That one hurt.Copy !req
218. - Leo?
- Hey! Great guess, man.Copy !req
219. Hey, I got a question.Copy !req
220. You guys know how to get to the overlook?Copy !req
221. You just gave us
directions to the overlook.Copy !req
222. Oh good. What did I say?Copy !req
223. Great, we're all lost.Copy !req
224. Just a heads-up.Copy !req
225. There's a squirrel
that's been picking on me, man.Copy !req
226. Tells me a joke and then he runs away
before he gets to the punch line.Copy !req
227. Not cool.Copy !req
228. How are we ever getting home?Copy !req
229. Hey. Why don't you use my car?Copy !req
230. Yeah. It's parked on the road
that goes right into town.Copy !req
231. Knock-knock what, you jerk?Copy !req
232. I'm so pissed at Leia right now.Copy !req
233. Yeah, yeah. She's a monster.Copy !req
234. I have bigger problems.Copy !req
235. Um, excuse me.Copy !req
236. I'd like to send this lemonade back.
I can taste the can.Copy !req
237. I want freshly squeezed,
and I want it pronto.Copy !req
238. Okay. May I have your member number?Copy !req
239. May I have your unemployment number?Copy !req
240. I'm so sorry.
I'll be right back with your drink.Copy !req
241. And bring some nachos for the lady!Copy !req
242. I'm here. I know I'm a little late,
but I can explain.Copy !req
243. Oh my God, I can't wait to hear.Copy !req
244. Oh wait. Don't care.Copy !req
245. You know what I went through to get here?
I risked my life.Copy !req
246. I just rode in a car where the seat belt
was a dried-out rattlesnake.Copy !req
247. - Do you want to split a cheese plate?
- I got you.Copy !req
248. Cheese plate!Copy !req
249. Gwen, are you serious? You're ignoring me?Copy !req
250. You knew how important this was to me,
and you still blew me off for Jay.Copy !req
251. Just forget it.Copy !req
252. - Forget what?
- Everything.Copy !req
253. Go back to Chicago and leave me alone.Copy !req
254. What? No, I'm not leaving
until we talk about this.Copy !req
255. Excuse me?Copy !req
256. Oh, good idea. Order some food,Copy !req
257. and we'll have
that heart-to-heart we need.Copy !req
258. She's not a member.Copy !req
259. Gwen, you don't have to do this.Copy !req
260. At least let me try the cheese plate!Copy !req
261. They are just letting
anyone in these days.Copy !req
262. Thank you for coming for moral support.Copy !req
263. I hope it wasn't
too much of an inconvenience.Copy !req
264. Are you kidding?Copy !req
265. Being inside of the school before everyone
else is giving me such an adrenaline rush.Copy !req
266. I feel like I can flip over a car.Copy !req
267. Oh no.Copy !req
268. Where is my résumé? It's not here.Copy !req
269. A can of tuna?Copy !req
270. Yeah, I put that on top of my résumé
so I wouldn't forget it.Copy !req
271. "To not" forget your résumé.Copy !req
272. - But you forgot it.
- Okay, why am I on trial here?Copy !req
273. Maybe this is a sign.
I have no business going back to work.Copy !req
274. Red was right.Copy !req
275. Well, I like the sound of that.Copy !req
276. Red, what are you doing here?Copy !req
277. - You forgot your résumé.Copy !req
278. And your wallet.Copy !req
279. And I found a slipper in the microwave.Copy !req
280. Yeah, yeah. I was… I was a little nervous.Copy !req
281. Yeah.Copy !req
282. And now that I'm here,
I think I'm losing my nerve.Copy !req
283. I mean, look how young they are.Copy !req
284. I bet none of them even remember
the days when you could smoke in the ER.Copy !req
285. Look.Copy !req
286. Any time that you have set your mind
to something, you have done it.Copy !req
287. I mean, I only wanted one kid,
and you talked me into Eric.Copy !req
288. And that turned out…Copy !req
289. So don't give up.Copy !req
290. You're a damn good nurse.Copy !req
291. Go on in there and get this job.Copy !req
292. Thank you.Copy !req
293. They are not gonna know what hit them.Copy !req
294. They'll call me when it's my turn.Copy !req
295. Nate? Are you okay?Copy !req
296. I'm so thirsty.Copy !req
297. Can you reach that water for me?Copy !req
298. And bring it to my lips?Copy !req
299. And tip it in my mouth? I'll do the rest.Copy !req
300. I thought you were
at the country club with Gwen.Copy !req
301. We got in a fight.Copy !req
302. She went off on me
for being a little late.Copy !req
303. She said some really mean things.Copy !req
304. Did she say you had dog nipples too?Copy !req
305. Um… no.Copy !req
306. Yeah.Copy !req
307. Me neither.Copy !req
308. Look. Whatever she said,
you gotta let it roll off your back.Copy !req
309. She gets like this. I mean…Copy !req
310. You're leaving soon.Copy !req
311. But I don't understand.Copy !req
312. I'm the one who has to go back to Chicago
and be invisible again.Copy !req
313. Gwen's gonna be all busy doing cool stuff,
hanging out with friends at school.Copy !req
314. Look, I know Gwen is like "Gwen" to you,Copy !req
315. but… it's different at school.Copy !req
316. A lot of people don't get her.Copy !req
317. I think she's gonna miss you
a lot more than you realize.Copy !req
318. She wasn't acting like it today.Copy !req
319. She got me tossed out of the country club.Copy !req
320. Tossed.Copy !req
321. Like DJ Jazzy Jeff.Copy !req
322. I don't know,Copy !req
323. but… it's probably just Gwen's
messed-up way of dealing with losing you.Copy !req
324. She's not.Copy !req
325. I'm gonna call and… and write
and visit whenever I can.Copy !req
326. She's my best friend.Copy !req
327. Can't imagine my life without her.Copy !req
328. Have you told her that?Copy !req
329. Maybe not enough.Copy !req
330. Thanks, Nate. You're really smart.Copy !req
331. No one's ever called me smart before.Copy !req
332. It sounds weird.Copy !req
333. Aw, Nate.Copy !req
334. Ow, ow, ow, ow!Copy !req
335. I got the job!Copy !req
336. Attagirl! I knew you would.Copy !req
337. They were so impressed
with my knowledge and my experience.Copy !req
338. And the woman who was interviewing me
forgot her lunch,Copy !req
339. so I gave her my can of tuna.Copy !req
340. Sealed the deal.Copy !req
341. Well, as long as you're happy,
I am happy for you.Copy !req
342. I am.Copy !req
343. I can't believe it.
I'm going back to work.Copy !req
344. It happened again.
I'm not cut out for woodshop.Copy !req
345. Neat. Guess I'll be having those
all the time now.Copy !req
346. I know you're there.Copy !req
347. Hey, buddy.Copy !req
348. - Don't.
- Oh, I'm gonna.Copy !req
349. Look. Sometimes distance
can bring you closer.Copy !req
350. Have you ever made someone laugh
from thousands of miles away?Copy !req
351. Or… or… faxed your friend a recipeCopy !req
352. from the beach?Copy !req
353. That's from an AT&T commercial.Copy !req
354. I'm trying here.Copy !req
355. You can try all you want,
but I'm not doing this.Copy !req
356. Yes, we are doing this.Copy !req
357. You think I'm gonna leave
and never talk to you again?Copy !req
358. That's not an option.
You have to talk to me.Copy !req
359. Because, with AT&T's
new long-distance plan,Copy !req
360. you can't afford not to.Copy !req
361. Gwen, for real, you're my best friend,
and nothing will ever change that.Copy !req
362. If I'm in Chicago, I'm here for you.Copy !req
363. If I'm on the moon, I'm here for you.Copy !req
364. When we die,
my ghost will haunt your ghost.Copy !req
365. So get used to it,
because you're stuck with me.Copy !req
366. I'm gonna miss you.Copy !req
367. I'll miss you even more.Copy !req
368. You're listening to Michael Bolton?Copy !req
369. You really were
in a dark place.Copy !req
370. If you tell anyone, I'll kill you.Copy !req
371. Come on. You got this.Copy !req
372. Push. Push, Nate!Copy !req
373. Nice.Copy !req
374. You're an animal.Copy !req
375. Thanks, bro.Copy !req
376. This time tomorrow,
I'll be able to use a fork.Copy !req
377. Hey. Sorry I wasn't here to help you out.Copy !req
378. That's okay. Nikki wasn't either.Copy !req
379. I think she was pretty annoyed.Copy !req
380. But you know who did help me out? Leia.Copy !req
381. You lucked out, man. She's pretty great.Copy !req
382. Yeah, when she's here.Copy !req
383. What do you mean?Copy !req
384. Well…Copy !req
385. How am I supposed to make this work
with Leia when she leaves?Copy !req
386. I mean, yesterday was a mess,Copy !req
387. and it's only gonna get more complicated
when she's all the way in Chicago.Copy !req
388. I'm kinda freaked out.Copy !req
389. - I think we need to have a serious talk.
- We are having a serious talk.Copy !req
390. I meant me and Leia.Copy !req
391. Oh.Copy !req
392. Oh!Copy !req