1. Okay, don't mind us, girls, we
are just prettying up the room
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2. because we're showing
the house later today.
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3. The listing said "finished
basement" and finished!
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4. Well, we're not going
to be selling anything
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5. if we don't get rid of
all this clutter,
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6. so get the hell out.
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7. I can't leave yet.
I told Fez I'd meet him here.
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8. He went to
the airport to pick up
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9. his best friend from back home.
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10. Oh, great, another mocha
skinned weirdo in tight pants
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11. who can make any word sound
like boogadaboogadaboogada!
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12. You know he is
coming to cheer Fez up.
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13. The poor guy hasn't been
himself since you rejected him.
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14. You know it's weird, I actually
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15. miss his chocolaty stained
fingerprints on my bras.
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16. Yeah. Well, you know what?
I don't want to see Fez.
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17. I mean, he called me ugly
on the inside and the outside.
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18. I'm sorry, but he's just wrong
about the outside part.
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19. Holy crap, man!
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20. What?
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21. Listen to this
letter from my dad.
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22. "Dear valued Grooves employee,
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23. "your services
are no longer required.
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24. "I've sold the chain of stores
to a dry-cleaning corporation
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25. "for, frankly,
a butt load of money.
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26. "You should see the check,
whooee!
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27. "I thank you for your years
of dedicated service.
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28. "As of Friday,
you're trespassing."
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29. Can you believe this, man?
I'm out of a job!
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30. Well, how do you think
Leo feels?
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31. Well, probably how
he always feels. Stoned.
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32. Everyone, I'd like you to meet
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33. my best friend from
back home, Andrew Davis.
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34. How do you do? It's so
wonderful to be stateside.
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35. So you're Fez's friend
from wherever he's from?
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36. Yes, and I know
exactly who you are.
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37. You're a frigid,
unpleasant woman
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38. who enjoys stomping
on a man's heart for sport.
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39. You disgust me, Jackie.
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40. I'm not Jackie, I'm Donna.
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41. Oh, you are gorgeous.
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42. So, you guys are
from the same place?
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43. Of course not. He's from
the west side of the island.
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44. Hello, Wisconsin!
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45. You know what,
enough of this jibber jabber.
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46. I brought you folks
a gift from back home.
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47. Pretty good gift, eh?
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48. Take it easy, though,
a little goes a long way.
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49. You know what else
goes a long way, man? A lot!
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50. You know what else
goes a long way? Spiders.
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51. That little guy made it
all the way
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52. from the light bulb to the pipe.
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53. Way to go, Mr. Spider!
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54. Don't even think
about it, Andrew.
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55. Spiders here have
very little meat.
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56. Regardless, it's still
so exciting to be in America.
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57. It's true what they say.
The streets are paved!
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58. I'm starting to
feel weird, guys.
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59. My hair is tingly,
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60. my palms are sweating
and my pulse is racing.
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61. Oh, man, I think I overdid it!
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62. Stop jibber jabbering, old boy.
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63. I told you
the stuff was pretty strong.
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64. Just take a deep breath
and relax.
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65. Yes, I'm sure you'll be okay
after a few minutes.
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66. Until then, just continue
to sweat and grind your teeth.
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67. Or you can do what you usually
do when you've had too much,
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68. switch to beer.
Whoa, Hyde, are you okay?
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69. Of course I'm okay.
It's you that's not okay.
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70. But you're me.
So if you're not okay
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71. it means I'm not okay,
which means...
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72. I'm going out of my
freaking mind here!
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73. You're going to be fine. Do you
guys think I should change my hair?
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74. Okay, well,
the house is all set.
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75. Mr. and Mrs. Dubois
should be here any minute.
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76. Dubois? Kitty, I don't want
Germans moving in here!
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77. I think they're French.
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78. Yes, and if they buy the house,
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79. they'll give it up to the first
German who knocks at the door.
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80. Okay, well,
I have to get to work.
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81. Are you sure you can show
this house by yourself?
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82. Kitty, I showed a Japanese soldier
the inside of his own stomach,
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83. I think I can show a house.
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84. So, through there is the den,
back there is the kitchen,
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85. and upstairs are the bedrooms.
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86. Could we see them?
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87. Oh, so my word's
not good enough?
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88. Well, is there
a bathroom upstairs?
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89. No, we just whiz off the roof.
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90. In here you got the stove and
the fridge, both still under warranty.
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91. Oh, is this the kitchen?
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92. No, it's a petting zoo.
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93. There's the goat, pony ride.
Oh, there's the dumb ass!
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94. In here I built a whole
workbench against this wall
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95. so there is plenty of space
for all your tools.
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96. Actually I was thinking I
could turn it into a yoga studio.
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97. Really, and I was thinking I could
turn your ass into my foot studio.
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98. Randy, what are you doing here?
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99. Your dad invited me over.
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100. I figured if you two talked,
maybe you'd get back together.
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101. I mean, it didn't work
for your mom and me
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102. but that was mostly because
of sleeping with strangers.
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103. Oh, so all of a sudden
Aunt Jenny is a stranger?
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104. Donna, I'm sure you probably
don't even want to see me right now,
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105. but I never had a chance
to tell you how I feel.
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106. Straight from the heart,
my own words.
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107. So I made you this mix tape.
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108. "Grandma's last words."
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109. Oh, I taped over that.
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110. You really couldn't hear
over the respirator anyway.
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111. Oh, Red, how did it go
showing the house?
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112. Why don't you ask all the dumb
asses that came through here?
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113. So, poorly then.
Maybe I should show the house.
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114. I heard that
you're supposed to make
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115. a home feel warm and
friendly and inviting.
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116. So you should probably leave.
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117. Yeah, I just don't have
the patience for these people.
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118. I hate to admit it,
but I wish they were all dead.
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119. I'm telling you, Leo,
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120. yesterday in the basement I
had the worst trip I've ever had.
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121. Hey, I don't care
how bad your trip was, man,
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122. you better have brought me
back a snow globe or something.
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123. It was a total freak out, man.
I had this hallucination
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124. that everyone else
turned into me.
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125. It was me and
a whole bunch of mes!
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126. Was I there?
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127. No.
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128. That's it, Leo. You know what,
I'm quitting the circle, man.
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129. And I feel really good about it.
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130. In fact,
this calls for a celebration!
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131. I have no idea what to do.
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132. How can I turn down
Jackie Burkhart?
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133. I don't even hang up
on wrong numbers.
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134. Look, since there's no chance
of anything with her,
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135. why are you even sticking
around here any more?
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136. Well, where else would I go?
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137. Home, old boy! Come home!
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138. Home?
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139. Yeah, that's a good idea!
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140. I'll go back to Brazil and then,
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141. I'll catch
a flight home from there.
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142. Oh, coming!
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143. Oh, hello there,
I'm Kitty Forman.
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144. I'm so excited to
show you my home.
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145. Okay, now,
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146. this is the living room where I
have spent many happy hours.
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147. Not "happy hours" like at a bar.
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148. Although, I would be lying if I said I
didn't try to start that up around here.
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149. No, but I have spent many
wonderful times with the kids in here.
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150. Before they moved so very far
away. Oh, sad! Okay, follow me.
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151. And this is my kitchen.
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152. And this is the table where
Eric would do his homework
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153. and Laurie would do her nails.
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154. You know, some people
used to call her a tramp
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155. but that's not fair, there is
nothing wrong with being friendly.
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156. You know, I guess the four of us
will never sit here together again.
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157. Okay, let's move on.
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158. Now, this is the dining room
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159. where we'd have
all our special dinners
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160. and Red's mother
used to always tell me
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161. my pot roast was too dry. But what
does she know, she's in hell now.
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162. You know, I always thought
that I would serve
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163. dinner to my
grandchildren in here.
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164. Oh, my gosh,
I'm just choking up.
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165. Okay and here,
okay, this is the den.
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166. Oh!
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167. And these are the marks
on the wall where
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168. we measured the kids' height
when they were growing up.
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169. But you'll probably...
You'll just paint over this.
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170. You unfeeling bastards! Yeah!
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171. You will get this house when you
pry it from my cold, dead fingers.
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172. Oh, in fact, let me show you
one more thing, the door!
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173. Hey, Steven, what are you doing?
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174. I'm painting this
model I just finished.
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175. I have a lot more free time
now that I quit the circle.
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176. What, you quit the circle?
What are you, high?
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177. I don't do that any more,
Jackie. I don't need to.
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178. Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'm gonna go for a jog.
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179. Oh, and if you see
Mrs. Forman,
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180. can you let her know that I'll
be making the salad tonight?
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181. Oh! It's you.
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182. I'm here to get some things belonging
to the man whose heart you broke.
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183. Because he's
packing and leaving.
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184. Now, who is this Kitty
and where is her underwear?
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185. Wait, Fez is leaving?
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186. - Hmm.
- Why?
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187. Oh, because of you.
He is in bad shape, Jackie.
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188. What? He hurt me first!
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189. Do you know what he told me?
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190. He said that if he could go back
in time and take back five words,
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191. those words would be, "Now
you're ugly on the outside,
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192. "just like
you are on the inside."
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193. That's more than five words.
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194. All his words run together,
he doesn't know.
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195. So I said to him,
"Why would you want to
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196. "take those words back?"
He said to me,
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197. so he wouldn't have
to go through life
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198. knowing he'd hurt
the woman he loved.
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199. Oh.
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200. And you broke his heart.
You disgust me!
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201. I frankly don't
understand why any man
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202. would ever want to be with you!
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203. So, want to make out?
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204. So, what do you think?
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205. Look, I just... I think we both
need to move on with our lives.
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206. I'm sorry.
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207. Oh, well. I gave it a shot.
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208. But you're making a big mistake,
because I am the best thing
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209. that is ever going
to happen to you!
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210. Really? Still nothing?
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211. So, friends then? All right.
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212. Hey, guys.
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213. What's going on?
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214. Steven, we need to talk, man.
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215. We're here because we're
your friends and we love you.
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216. But ever since you quit
the circle, you've changed.
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217. I mean, what's this I hear
about you eating a vegetable?
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218. Look at you. Your eyes
are clear, your shirt is clean.
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219. I hardly recognize you.
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220. You have
a problem with drugs, man.
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221. I don't have a problem!
I can start any time I want!
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222. Oh, yeah? Then why
don't you start right now?
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223. Or don't you have the guts?
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224. You guys don't understand.
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225. The last time I was in the
circle, I totally freaked out!
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226. I know why you freaked out,
man. All your friends are leaving
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227. and the record store is closing.
Your life is changing, man.
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228. See, it's not the circle that's the
problem. It's that your life is crap.
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229. Oh, my God. I've been
using sobriety as a crutch.
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230. I need help!
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231. We're here for you.
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232. Hold out your hands, man.
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233. I love you, guys!
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234. Red, I have bad news.
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235. The people I showed the house
to, they just weren't interested.
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236. I have no idea why.
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237. It doesn't matter. The clown
who does yoga made an offer.
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238. So I said, "It's a deal, you
downward-facing dumb ass."
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239. Isn't it great? A month
from now, we'll be in Florida.
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240. Yeah. Far away from all
our family and friends.
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241. Jeez, Kitty, put it like that,
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242. we should leave tonight!
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243. Hey, there, son.
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244. WB.
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245. I guess you heard the news.
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246. Yeah.
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247. Well, I got some
more great news for you.
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248. I bought a Corvette!
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249. Good for you, man. You know,
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250. you didn't have to come all the
way down here to tell me that,
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251. you could have just
sent it in a form letter.
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252. "Dear employee,
bought a Corvette. Whooee!"
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253. Listen, Steven,
that letter was just for
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254. the faceless employees
that I don't care about.
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255. Hey, thanks for the letter, man.
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256. Look, I wanted to come here
personally to tell you the big news.
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257. I'm giving you this store.
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258. Yes, you're the proud owner
of the last remaining Grooves.
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259. Holy crap, I own this place?
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260. Yep.
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261. You can even
rename it something more
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262. appropriate to this
lily-white community.
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263. You can call it Rhythmless
or Snap at the Wrong Time.
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264. Wow, man!
It's, like, the nicest thing
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265. any one of my dads
has ever done for me.
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266. You know,
it just goes to show you,
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267. if you sit on your ass long
enough, good stuff will happen.
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268. Yup! That is some good stuff.
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269. I've missed you, Hyde.
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270. Just like they always say,
"Hey, Leo, how's it going?"
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271. Son, if this is how
you're going to run
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272. this store now that it's yours,
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273. I got to tell you, I'm going to
be stopping by a lot more often.
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274. Oh, Fez, I'm so
glad you're still here.
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275. Yes, I wanted to
take one last look
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276. at the basement before I leave.
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277. Look, Fez, Andrew told me
what you said.
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278. And now that I know,
I can't let you leave.
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279. I'm sorry, Jackie,
it's too late. I'm leaving.
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280. And there's nothing anybody
can say to get me to stay.
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281. I want to be your girlfriend.
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282. - I'll stay.
- You will?
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283. Yes! But I don't want to be
just some rebound for you.
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284. And I need to know that
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285. you're not going to leave me
when something better comes along.
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286. Fez, there is no one
better for me than you!
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287. I'm just sorry that it took
me so long to figure that out.
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288. You really mean that?
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289. Of course!
Fez, I want to be with you.
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290. And I'm so happy that
we can finally be together.
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291. Wow!
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292. I've been waiting so long
to hear those three words.
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293. Man, I can't believe
I'm not going
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294. to be around to
see you two together.
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295. It's going to go
one of two ways.
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296. It could be
a disaster or a catastrophe.
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297. Blah, blah, blah! You always say
you're leaving, but you never do.
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298. I am serious, I'm finally
going to get out of this town
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299. and do something with my life.
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300. Eric called, he's coming home!
He's coming home!
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301. Yeah, you're not going anywhere.
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302. So you grew up with Fez, huh?
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303. You know, we've been wondering
something for a long time.
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304. Where the hell
are you guys from?
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305. Isn't it obvious?
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306. Okay, just tell us
what's the name
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307. of your country?
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308. Well, that depends
on whether you ask
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309. the British or the Dutch.
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310. Okay, so what if
we ask the British?
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311. Oh, no, no, no, no!
They wouldn't tell you.
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312. They hate us.
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313. So, what if we ask the Dutch?
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314. Oh, who can understand
a word they say?
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315. http://hiqve.com/
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