1. Forman, your bachelor party's tonight.
We're going to a strip club,
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2. so don't forget your inhaler.
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3. Come on, Hyde.
I don't need a silly bachelor party.
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4. Oh, come on, man. Be one last night of the finest
debauchery that Point Place has to offer.
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5. Hyde, all I need is my sweetie
here for the rest of my life.
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6. - It's all right, Eric. You can go.
- All right! I'm gonna see nudies!
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7. Oh, Eric, you're not going to one of those
hoochie mama shows, are you?
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8. Don't worry, Mrs. Forman.
I'll return your son in the same
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9. slightly girly condition that he leaves in.
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10. So, Donna, you and the gals getting
together for a big shindig?
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11. Well, Jackie might be planning..
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12. No, wait. She doesn't do things
for other people.
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13. Well, let me plan your
bachelorette party.
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14. Oh, we went absolutely
bonkers at mine.
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15. All my girlfriends came over for a
sewing bee, and then my friend Gloria
gave me my first sip of hard cider.
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16. Boy, you girls are crazy.
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17. Well, back then, we had some morals,
not like you girls today.
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18. loose, throwing it around
town like the paperboy.
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19. Donna, why am I blindfolded?
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20. Because I have a big surprise for you.
Okay, you ready?
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21. Isn't it awesome?
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22. We're gonna spray-paint our
names on a trailer? All right!
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23. No, I put a deposit on it so we can live here.
Eric, it's gonna be our very own.
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24. Oh, how romantic. I can just see Donna
carrying you over that threshold.
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25. So come on.
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26. I know you always dreamed
about having a home of your own.
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27. Well, I guess I should have
been more specific.
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28. Um, no, no. You know what?
This is nice. It's nice.
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29. Donna, this is great!
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30. Steven, if you ever rent me a trailer,
I will dump you in a second.
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31. Good to know.
I need an exit strategy.
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32. See, now if we all turn this way...
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33. There. See?
Room for everybody.
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34. See? Now this is the closeness
I've been craving.
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35. Whose hand is that?
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36. - Mine. - Mine.
- Mine.
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37. Oh, man. Look at this tiny shower.
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38. Donna, I don't think there's room in there
for you to soap your chest like we like.
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39. Donna...
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40. are you sure you want to live in Point Place?
I always thought you wanted to leave town.
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41. Well, Eric, that's when I was single. But now
that we're getting married, I want to settle
down and start our lives together.
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42. Yeah, but I always thought...
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43. - You smell pretty.
- Okay.
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44. Look, can we do this in private?
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45. Bathroom's free.
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46. Um, actually, I was just, uh,
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47. heading there.
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48. Excuse me.
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49. Pardon me.
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50. Excuse me.
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51. Let me just get the, uh, curtain.
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52. Okay, I can't do this with
all you listening.
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53. Somebody's gonna have to sing.
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54. - Fez, you sing.
- I can't do both at the same time.
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55. Please hurry!
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56. On the good ship lollipop
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57. it's a sweet trip to the candy shop
where the bonbons play...
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58. I had a large soda.
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59. On the sunny beach of
peppermint bay
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60. So it's ours starting today.
I signed the lease for a year.
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61. Donna, all you ever talked about
was seeing the world, and
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62. And my dad's better now.
I mean, we can get out.
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63. Well, I don't wanna get out. I just want to focus
on doing this marriage thing right,
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64. And I think that means curling up every
night next to you on that dining room
table that doubles as a bed.
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65. Well, the good news is,
if you guys do decide to travel,
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66. You can always drive your house
to any number of vacation destinations.
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67. Yeah, and if you ever want to rearrange your
furniture, all you gotta do is slam on the brakes.
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68. Hold everything.
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69. I believe that is the ice cream man.
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70. Oh, wait. Look, he's turning around!
No! No,
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71. Come back! We're not from here!
We won't rob you!
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72. Oh...
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73. I mean, it's pretty here.
There's lots of open space.
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74. I'm coming in, Tracy! There better
not be anyone in there with ya!
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75. Hey, the neighbors seem really nice.
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76. Just tell him you're naked 'cause.. I don't know.
That's why I'm climbing out the window.
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77. Casey Kelso?
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78. Hey! Pinciotti.
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79. Casey, I thought you left town after
going out with Donna and then breaking up
with her so she had to settle for Eric.
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80. Yeah, well, I found my way back.
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81. Hey, For-play.
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82. - You been working out?
- Oh, um,
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83. - Well, yeah, a few days a week.
- Oh, man, I'm just kidding.
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84. Well, it's not funny. He's huge.
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85. Things are great.
Eric and I are getting married.
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86. I'm on the radio.."Hot Donna."
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87. You might've heard people talking,
wishing they could date me, that kind of stuff.
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88. Yeah, I mean, Donna hasn't thought
about you at all,
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89. although Eric's mom still asks about you.
Then she kind of giggles and fans herself.
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90. You! You get back here!
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91. Hey, little advice.. never answer the phone
when you're with a married lady.
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92. See, Forman? Now at the bachelor
party you can hold a beer
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93. even after you've lost
the ability to hold a beer
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94. from drinking all the beer.
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95. I like it.
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96. Kind of makes me wonder why god didn't just
make us this way from the start, you know?
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97. Don't worry, man.
Evolution will take care of it.
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98. Hey, Steven, I took out all the $1 bills
from your wallet, so now you have
nothing to tip the strippers with.
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99. All I have left is this $20?
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100. Jeez, I'll never be able to
get change for this.
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101. Sorry I'm late, guys. I spent
all afternoon in front of the mirror.
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102. Then I realized it was
time to get dressed.
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103. Fez, you don't have to look nice, all right?
Strippers like everybody.
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104. They're raised that way on
special farms out west.
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105. Okay, Eric, I talked to my boss down at the radio
station, and I told him we were staying in town,
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106. and I said that if he wanted to keep me,
he would have to put me on the air full-time,
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107. - And he went for it! "Hot Donna"
every day on WFDP.
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108. Oh, Donna, that's amazing.
All you had to do is ask?
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109. Oh, and I tied my shirt up
in one of those sexy knots.
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110. Yeah, Jackie does that.
We have never paid to get into Six Flags.
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111. - Wait. But, Donna, if you take this job,
how are you gonna..
- Why are you waving a mug at me?
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112. I'm sorry. How are you gonna
find time for college?
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113. I don't know. I'll just stop going.
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114. Eric, I'm a DJ. I already have the
kind of job I was going to college to get.
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115. Yeah, college sucks anyways. It's all smart people,
and none of them are as pretty as me.
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116. Yeah, that's true. Half the people in this
room ought to be in magazines.
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117. Only half, though, and the rest of you
know who you are.
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118. Eric, we both have jobs.
We have a great place to live.
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119. - We're gonna have the perfect
life in Point Place. - Huh.
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120. That's funny. I've never heard the words
"perfect life" and "Point Place"
used in the same sentence...
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121. oh, except when separated by the phrase
"as soon as I get the hell out of."
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122. All right. We gentlemen
have a place to be.
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123. So unless you ladies are gonna finally
take your clothes off to music...
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124. Last chance?
No? Okay.
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125. Wow, Mrs. Forman, you can really
whip up a party in no time.
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126. And we have activities.
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127. Okay, now watch.
You tie the ribbon in a bow,
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128. and voil�, decorative
bags of almonds.
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129. We'll make 300 to pass out
at the wedding.
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130. Wait, this is Donna's
bachelorette party?
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131. What other manual
laborare we gonna do?
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132. Huh, scrub a toilet,
dig a trench, write a book?
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133. Well, if we don't do this,
who will?
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134. I can't believe you invited me over
and you don't have any dip.
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135. Red, we're having a girl's night out. I need you
to bag all the almonds and tie 'em with a bow.
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136. - Why me?
- 'Cause I said so.
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137. - I don't want to.
- Well, you have to.
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138. - Fine.
- Good.
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139. Since you're getting married,
I'll teach you how to do that.
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140. - To Forman and Donna.
- TO FORMAN AND DONNA!
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141. Where is Forman?
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142. - Who cares?
- WHO CARES?
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143. How did I not know
about this place?
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144. I spent my whole life trying to get girls
to take their clothes off,
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145. and all I needed was $10.
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146. You know, I don't understand why chicks
don't like guys to look at strippers.
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147. I mean, these women are artists.
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148. It's like Leonardo.. or da Vinci.
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149. - Bravo.
- Bravo. Bravo.
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150. Forman, where's your beer hand?
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151. I chewed off the tape
in the men's room.
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152. Wait, that was you makin'
those sounds?
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153. Hey, you know, forget what I said about
there being a mummy in the bathroom.
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154. I can't stop thinking about
what Donna's doing.
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155. The only reason she's still in
Point Place is 'cause of me.
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156. If it weren't for me, she'd probably be
on the other side of the World by now.
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157. Hey, I grew up on that
side of the world,
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158. and it's no picnic.
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159. Although when you eat
every meal on the ground,
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160. I suppose, technically it is a picnic.
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161. Look, all I know is
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162. if I let Donna stay in Point Place,
she's gonna miss out on all those
great things she wanted to do,
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163. and it'll be all my fault.
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164. Forman, would you quit whining?
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165. Donna's gonna marry you. From where I'm sittin',
what's on your plate looks pretty good.
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166. You don't cut open the sausage,
Forman. You just eat it.
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167. Well, I wish it were that easy, Hyde,
but it's a complex emotional issue...
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168. Hey, Phil Donahue, live nudes.
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169. Oh, well, now this looks like a good place
for a bachelorette party.
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170. Yeah, did you see that neon sign out front?
It had a naked man with an arrow pointing this way.
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171. Um, I don't think that was an arrow.
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172. Welcome to the little boy's room where every night
is ladies' night.. everybody's pants come off.
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173. Well, that's a catchy slogan.
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174. These guys have been doing some hard time,
and they're dyin' to meet some ladies.
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175. Well, now he.. he looks like
he's been a bad boy!
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176. Take it off! Take it off!
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177. Is that how we do this? I'm not sure
how to be naughty in public.
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178. Ooh!
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179. These guys are goin' back to jail
for assault with a sexy weapon.
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180. Oh, my god, Casey?
Oh, my god, Casey!
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181. it's just,
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182. Donna's giving up everything
she ever wanted.
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183. I can't help but feel like
I'm holding her back, you know?
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184. Okay, just so you know,
I make most my money on tips.
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185. I'm sorry.
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186. Here, you.. y.. y..
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187. - You should probably just take this.
- Thanks.
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188. Forman, would you quit
depressing the strippers?
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189. When you depress the strippers,
they go like this.
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190. Yeah, this isn't some hole in the wall where
hopeless losers blow their money on people
who don't care about their problems.
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191. This is a strip joint.
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192. Yes, it is, Eric.
You're ruining the romance.
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193. You, dance for my money!
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194. And the rabbit runs around...
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195. and then back in the hole.
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196. Hey, Red, what do ya
think of my nut bag?
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197. Ha ha, Bob.
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198. I'm done with this.
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199. This is not man's work.
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200. I mean, if Kitty wanted me to shoot the almonds
at some communists, that I could do.
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201. Oh, you're a big talker
now that she's gone.
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202. I'm not afraid of her,
and I'm not doin' this,
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203. and I don't care if it means I have to sit
through another one of her silent breakfasts.
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204. - What, she just sits there?
- I talk, she just ignores me.
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205. I had to buy a bottle of
Mrs. Butterworth's
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206. just so that someone
would smile at me.
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207. You can always call me, Red.
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208. I'd rather talk to syrup.
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209. - So workin' at a strip club.
- Yeah.
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210. I finally found a way to cash in on my good
looks without having to humiliate myself.
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211. No, you're not humiliating yourself.
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212. I mean, you're not the naked guy.
You're the guy who introduces the naked guy.
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213. Yeah.
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214. So I'm surprised to see you're still in town. You know,
you'd always talked about gettin' outta here.
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215. I always thought you'd
be some place more
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216. glamorous by now,
like Paris or Reno.
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217. Well, I've got Eric and my job
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218. and a great place to live in
and/or pull behind a car.
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219. I mean, it's not what I expected,
but it's definitely the right thing to do.
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220. You know,
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221. that trailer is tiny, and
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222. I need room to roam.
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223. born free
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224. as free as the.. something free
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225. you know, this town is so small,
I don't even know what free is.
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226. Yeah. Look, listen, I've been other places,
and it's not that great.
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227. I mean, since I came back here,
I've got it made..
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228. free drinks, I can borrow any of these
freaky costumes when I want.
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229. Plus, you know,
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230. - It's showbiz.
- Yeah.
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231. So
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232. You're happy here.
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233. Yeah, and you will be, too.
And don't worry, you know,
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234. by the time you have a few kids,
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235. you'll probably be livin' in
a much bigger trailer.
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236. Hi. You home already?
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237. I thought those boys would take your clothes
and leave you naked in Indiana.
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238. You kids.. you just don't
know how to do anything.
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239. Listen, dad,
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240. Donna wants to stay in Point Place
after we get married. I..
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241. how can that be a good idea?
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242. Son, in this relationship,
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243. you're gonna have one instinct,
and Donna's gonna have another.
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244. Always go with hers.
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245. If history has taught us anything,
it's that you're always wrong.
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246. What about the time that I...
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247. oh, yeah, I got nothin'.
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248. You know, being with your mother
has taught me one thing.
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249. A man can only rise to the level
of the woman that he's with.
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250. hey, what's up?
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251. I saw a naked man's butt.
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252. Donna, happy fifth anniversary!
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253. Hey, I want you to put on your best dress,
because there's another sequel to "Star Wars."
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254. And Mr. and Mrs. Eric Forman
are gonna be first in line.
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255. What's goin' on?
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256. I'm leaving you, Eric.
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257. What? Wh..
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258. We could see the new
Jane Fonda movie instead.
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259. Eric, I'm miserable.
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260. How can you let me settle for this?
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261. But you said this is
what you wanted.
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262. Well, I was wrong. I guess I was just trying
to make you happy, and I forgot about myself.
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263. I mean, I wanted to see the world,
not the inside of a trailer.
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264. But, Donna, I love you.
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265. I love you, too, but it's not enough.
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266. Good-bye, Eric.
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267. - I'm sorry... Yes,
- Can you just take that?
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268. - You can just squeeze through there.
- Thank you.
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269. Hey, For-play.
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270. - Casey?
- Yeah,
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271. your mom said I could bunk here.
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272. But don't worry, bud, as soon as everybody's asleep,
I'm gonna head over to your sister's room.
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273. So beautiful morning, huh?
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274. Boy, these waffles look great.
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