1. Hey, you guys! Great news!
Copy !req
2. I was walking around
Halverson's Department Store...
Copy !req
3. and the owner comes right up to me,
and he offered me a modeling job.
Copy !req
4. Yeah. Whoo!
Copy !req
5. Wait, wait.
He just offered you a modeling job?
Copy !req
6. Yeah, sounds
a little suspicious.
Copy !req
7. I mean, how do you know
it was the owner?
Copy !req
8. Because it was
Mr. Halverson.
Copy !req
9. How do you know
it was Mr. Halverson?
Copy !req
10. Because I said,
"Aren't you Mr. Halverson?"
Copy !req
11. And he said, "Yeah."
Copy !req
12. - Hey, Hyde, aren't you Mr. Halverson?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
13. See? Look, Michael. I've been in
that store over a hundred times...
Copy !req
14. and Mr. Halverson never asked me
to be a model.
Copy !req
15. And if Mr. Halverson never
asked me to be a model...
Copy !req
16. then there's
no Mr. Halverson.
Copy !req
17. It's a scam.
Copy !req
18. I don't know.
It doesn't sound like a scam to me.
Copy !req
19. - Thank you, Donna.
- Sounds like Mr. Halverson wants you for his lover.
Copy !req
20. Either way,
I'm flattered.
Copy !req
21. Hyde, will you teach me
how to drive the El Camino?
Copy !req
22. Rhonda's car is a stick
and until I learn to drive it...
Copy !req
23. I have to sit
in the lady seat.
Copy !req
24. No way, man.
The Camino's cherry.
Copy !req
25. - Please?
- No.
Copy !req
26. Please, please, please?
Copy !req
27. No.
Copy !req
28. Please, please, please,
please, please, please...
Copy !req
29. please, please, please, please, please,
please, please, please, please.
Copy !req
30. Please, please, please, please, please,
please, please, please, please...
Copy !req
31. please, please, please,
please, please, please...
Copy !req
32. - please, please, please, please, please, please, pl...
- All right! All right!
Copy !req
33. You can use the El Camino.
Copy !req
34. But you have to
be careful, all right?
Copy !req
35. I don't want anything
to happen to my baby.
Copy !req
36. Aw, thanks for your concern,
Hyde, but I'll be fine.
Copy !req
37. And let out the clutch
gently, okay?
Copy !req
38. - 'Cause this car's very powerful.
- Hyde!
Copy !req
39. We've been sitting here
for half an hour.
Copy !req
40. Will you just shut your hole
and let me drive?
Copy !req
41. Okay, you're clear.
Copy !req
42. In front of you.
Copy !req
43. Man, I picked a bad place
to take a nap.
Copy !req
44. Hey, Todd, I'm gonna
take my break now.
Copy !req
45. - Michael's stopping by.
- Still dating that guy?
Copy !req
46. I guess that's fine
if you like the handsome type.
Copy !req
47. But does he have a picture of himself
with the guy who played Chewbacca?
Copy !req
48. 'Cause I do.
Copy !req
49. Hey, Jackie!
More great modeling news.
Copy !req
50. They're startin' me in underwear.
Copy !req
51. Look, I got a W-4
and a body-waxing kit and everything.
Copy !req
52. Oh. So you're really
an underwear model?
Copy !req
53. No, not just underwear... briefs.
Copy !req
54. I mean, usually, you have to spend
a year cutting your teeth in boxers...
Copy !req
55. before you even get
into the tight stuff.
Copy !req
56. You know what?
I don't have time for this right now.
Copy !req
57. It just isn't important.
Copy !req
58. - But, Jackie...
- Hey, maybe you didn't hear the lady.
Copy !req
59. She's busy.
So hit the road, guy.
Copy !req
60. I'm her boyfriend, guy.
Copy !req
61. Nuh-uh.
When she works here...
Copy !req
62. her boyfriend is every man, woman
and child that walks in here for cheese.
Copy !req
63. Well, I don't have
any money for cheese.
Copy !req
64. But I'm going to go get some,
and then we'll see whose boyfriend is whose.
Copy !req
65. Let me tell you
something, Jackie.
Copy !req
66. As a roving associate junior manager
for Cheese Palace, Incorporated...
Copy !req
67. I've seen
a lot of things...
Copy !req
68. some I can't talk about.
Copy !req
69. But I will
tell you two things.
Copy !req
70. With the German population
that this town has...
Copy !req
71. we should be moving
a lot more sausage.
Copy !req
72. You're a stone-cold fox.
Copy !req
73. I've said too much.
I'll be in the cooler.
Copy !req
74. Now, if your gown
falls open again...
Copy !req
75. there's no need
to ring the little buzzer.
Copy !req
76. You can just cover up
by yourself.
Copy !req
77. Okay, um, I'll be right back
with your "blankie."
Copy !req
78. "Thankie."
Copy !req
79. Leo, I'm so sorry
I hurt you.
Copy !req
80. Ah, that's all right, man.
I'll be fine.
Copy !req
81. Least I still got it
all up here.
Copy !req
82. But that's
just good genes, man.
Copy !req
83. My father had
a good hairline too.
Copy !req
84. Well, nice job, Fez.
Copy !req
85. The fender's dented, the taillight's shot,
so you owe me 80 bucks.
Copy !req
86. Okay, good luck with that.
Copy !req
87. - I'm broke.
- Well, like my mom used to tell me...
Copy !req
88. "Shut up and give me
some money."
Copy !req
89. Hey, you guys,
I was just next door...
Copy !req
90. and you know that weird kid from school
who's always saying he can fly?
Copy !req
91. Yeah, he can't.
Copy !req
92. So, Leo,
how's the hospital?
Copy !req
93. Oh, it's great, man.
Copy !req
94. Cable TV, free parking...
Copy !req
95. don't have to get out of bed
to take a pee.
Copy !req
96. It's just like a hotel.
Copy !req
97. And Nurse Kitty and I
have had some good times.
Copy !req
98. Okay, Leo,
I'm going to get you a surprise dessert.
Copy !req
99. It jiggles...
Copy !req
100. and it rhymes
with "jerry chello."
Copy !req
101. I love you too, Kitty.
Copy !req
102. I love you too.
Copy !req
103. Hey, Eric,
um, where's Donna?
Copy !req
104. Oh, she's out
with Kelso's brother.
Copy !req
105. Which means it's only a matter of time
before she calls us from the holding cell.
Copy !req
106. Well, I need
a woman's opinion.
Copy !req
107. Eh, you're close enough.
Look.
Copy !req
108. I'm just really upset
about Michael modeling.
Copy !req
109. I mean, that was
our dream... together.
Copy !req
110. But for me!
Copy !req
111. Wait, so, um,
in your dream...
Copy !req
112. you're a model,
and Kelso's, um, not there.
Copy !req
113. Whereas in real life,
Kelso's a model...
Copy !req
114. and you, um, sell cheese.
Copy !req
115. That is... delightful.
Copy !req
116. Hey, Red.
Copy !req
117. Could you give these
to your wife, please?
Copy !req
118. And tell her I love her.
Copy !req
119. I'll give her the message.
Copy !req
120. Thank you.
Copy !req
121. Oh, boy!
Copy !req
122. You got a date
for the Stoners' Ball.
Copy !req
123. "Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
Copy !req
124. Milk, eggs, coffee."
Copy !req
125. Who's the most handsome man
on earth?
Copy !req
126. U-R.
Copy !req
127. Michael, I've thought about your
modeling job, and I came to a decision.
Copy !req
128. I can't let you take
your pants off in public.
Copy !req
129. But I take my pants off
in public all the time.
Copy !req
130. You never said
anything before.
Copy !req
131. Because before you weren't doing it
for your glamorous new career.
Copy !req
132. You were doing it for the love
of being pantsless.
Copy !req
133. So, now promise me
you won't do it.
Copy !req
134. - Michael?
- Fine.
Copy !req
135. I "plomise."
Copy !req
136. I heard that.
Copy !req
137. You said, "I plomise."
Copy !req
138. There is no "L"
in promise.
Copy !req
139. Michael, promise me
with an "R."
Copy !req
140. Fine!
Copy !req
141. I pr-o-o-mise.
Copy !req
142. Okay, you promise
to what?
Copy !req
143. I promise I won't model
my "undelwear."
Copy !req
144. Michael!
Copy !req
145. Oh, fine!
Copy !req
146. That jerk.
Copy !req
147. He really is a jerk.
Copy !req
148. And you smell nice.
Copy !req
149. So?
Copy !req
150. Does it make you
wanna buy underwear?
Copy !req
151. No, it makes me wonder who
this guy is you're massaging.
Copy !req
152. That's Daryl.
Copy !req
153. I'm not massaging.
It's posing.
Copy !req
154. Shut up.
Copy !req
155. God, he's got a girlfriend.
I've got a girlfriend.
Copy !req
156. Yeah, and her name
is Daryl.
Copy !req
157. Hey, Fez.
Copy !req
158. Got that 80 bucks yet
for the El Camino?
Copy !req
159. As a matter of fact,
I do happen to not have it yet.
Copy !req
160. Well, why don't I hold
on to this until you do.
Copy !req
161. My candy.
Copy !req
162. You'll get your 80 bucks...
in hell!
Copy !req
163. Hey, Jackie,
how's it going?
Copy !req
164. You know, Michael,
not so good.
Copy !req
165. You lied to me
and you stole my dream.
Copy !req
166. How's it going
besides that?
Copy !req
167. You knew I always
wanted to be a model...
Copy !req
168. and you took
the job anyways.
Copy !req
169. I mean, if Mr. Halverson had
offered me a job as a spaceman...
Copy !req
170. I would have said no,
'cause that's your dream.
Copy !req
171. I thought
that out of everyone...
Copy !req
172. that you would be the one to be happy for me,
'cause you're supposed to love me.
Copy !req
173. Well, if that's what you
expected from me...
Copy !req
174. then obviously
you don't know me very well.
Copy !req
175. Okay. Well, when you're
ready to apologize...
Copy !req
176. I'll be downstairs
modeling stuff.
Copy !req
177. But, Michael!
Copy !req
178. Damn!
Copy !req
179. Man, if I was
your boyfriend...
Copy !req
180. I'd be giving up modeling for you,
and then taking it back up again...
Copy !req
181. just so I could
give it up again.
Copy !req
182. Well, I'm off
to the Fotohut.
Copy !req
183. Hope my new boyfriend
doesn't try to make a pass at me.
Copy !req
184. I... I don't think we have
to worry about that.
Copy !req
185. I see.
Copy !req
186. Kitty, I just mean
the whole thing is so... silly.
Copy !req
187. It's just so silly.
Copy !req
188. It's silly.
Copy !req
189. Well, it didn't
used to be silly.
Copy !req
190. I remember a time when you'd
beat up a guy just for looking at me.
Copy !req
191. Oh. Come on, Kitty.
I'm not worried about you and other guys.
Copy !req
192. I mean, you're
a little old for crushes.
Copy !req
193. What?
Copy !req
194. Oh, I didn't mean old.
Copy !req
195. I meant advanced in... beauty.
Copy !req
196. Hey. Michael and I
had a fight.
Copy !req
197. Maybe if we pretend she's not here,
she'll just... go away.
Copy !req
198. - I've tried. It doesn't work.
- Mm.
Copy !req
199. Look, he actually
stood up to me.
Copy !req
200. Things are changing between us.
I just don't know how to keep 'em the same.
Copy !req
201. I mean, he's not just modeling.
He's, like, leaving me behind.
Copy !req
202. Look, Jackie, you just...
You can't keep trying to control him.
Copy !req
203. Yeah, that's how Eric
ran me off.
Copy !req
204. Yeah, that's...
Copy !req
205. Thank you.
Uh, thank you for that.
Copy !req
206. Look, Jackie.
Copy !req
207. Take it from a guy
who pretty much...
Copy !req
208. hasn't been to second base
in over two months.
Copy !req
209. You gotta let him
have his own life.
Copy !req
210. You know,
maybe you guys are right.
Copy !req
211. Maybe the only way to keep
someone you love is by letting them go.
Copy !req
212. You know, a teacher
told me that once.
Copy !req
213. But she had grown-up braces,
so I didn't listen.
Copy !req
214. Oh, no.
Copy !req
215. Yup, it's me.
Copy !req
216. Hey, is my lady around?
Copy !req
217. Leo, buddy,
we gotta talk.
Copy !req
218. You're getting me
in a lot of trouble around here.
Copy !req
219. - Now, I'm begging you...
- Who is it, Red?
Copy !req
220. Listen, hophead!
Copy !req
221. I love that woman
with a... fiery passion...
Copy !req
222. that consumes my soul!
Copy !req
223. That's right!
So you can either...
Copy !req
224. walk outta here
on your own...
Copy !req
225. or you can hop outta here
with my boot in your ass!
Copy !req
226. Okay, I choose the one
with nothing in my ass.
Copy !req
227. Good choice!
Copy !req
228. Well, Red...
Copy !req
229. that was a pretty good show
you put on there.
Copy !req
230. You poured it on with a
"fiery passion that consumed your soul."
Copy !req
231. Hey, if you think
I'm puttin' on a show...
Copy !req
232. to get out of the doghouse...
Copy !req
233. you're way off base.
Copy !req
234. If I wanted to get out of trouble,
I'd just tell you how pretty you look.
Copy !req
235. Which I've been meaning to tell you.
You do.
Copy !req
236. - Oh, stow it.
- Oh, fine.
Copy !req
237. But, Kitty,
you gotta understand.
Copy !req
238. If I got mad at every guy that looked at you,
I'd drive myself crazy.
Copy !req
239. I don't even wanna think about
all those patients down at the hospital...
Copy !req
240. making googly eyes at you.
Copy !req
241. Not to mention the doctors.
Copy !req
242. Don't get me started
on those perverts!
Copy !req
243. They think the nursing staff is
their own personal dating service.
Copy !req
244. Glorified plumbers!
Copy !req
245. Okay. All right, Red.
You're getting very upset.
Copy !req
246. In fact, you look
downright miserable.
Copy !req
247. That makes me so happy.
Copy !req
248. Hey, Donna.
I just went to the store.
Copy !req
249. Check out my new...
Copy !req
250. empty bag.
Copy !req
251. Empty bag, huh?
Copy !req
252. If it's empty,
why are you so excited?
Copy !req
253. Well, because of its
amazing potential for storage.
Copy !req
254. Storage, huh?
Copy !req
255. It better be storing
an El Camino taillight.
Copy !req
256. Candy again?
Copy !req
257. You sick bastard!
Copy !req
258. You keep your distance,
scalawag.
Copy !req
259. Hey! If you guys
don't shut up...
Copy !req
260. the phrase "empty bag" is gonna take on
a whole new meaning for you.
Copy !req
261. - Huh?
- What?
Copy !req
262. It's a thinker.
Copy !req
263. But trust me,
you don't want it to happen.
Copy !req
264. Now, Hyde, you want money.
Fez doesn't have it.
Copy !req
265. So we just need to think of something
Fez can give you that's worth 80 bucks.
Copy !req
266. Eighteen dollars is your change.
Have a nice day.
Copy !req
267. Now, I know totally nude Fez
isn't original...
Copy !req
268. but everyone
seems to be happy.
Copy !req
269. I'm happy.
Copy !req
270. I'm happy too.
Copy !req
271. Hey, man, remember
the three-foot rule.
Copy !req
272. All right.
I'll stay right over here.
Copy !req
273. Great.
Okay, the ball's your best friend.
Copy !req
274. Give it a big smile. Great.
Now you're mad at the ball.
Copy !req
275. Oh, I hate you.
Bad ball. Great.
Copy !req
276. Huh.
Copy !req
277. Didn't expect
to see you here.
Copy !req
278. Well, I didn't
expect to come.
Copy !req
279. But I did a lot
of thinking, and...
Copy !req
280. No, no. Wh-What is it now?
You want me to drop out of high school?
Copy !req
281. Join the Salvation Army
and go off and fight wars?
Copy !req
282. I came here to talk to you
about your modeling, and...
Copy !req
283. Yeah, Jackie,
I don't have time for it right now.
Copy !req
284. It just isn't important.
Copy !req
285. Sound familiar?
Oh, yeah.
Copy !req
286. - You should go now.
- Wait, but...
Copy !req
287. Okay. Hey, let's build
a sand castle.
Copy !req
288. Oh, and it's your favorite thing
in the world.
Copy !req
289. Great! Hey, some jerk just kicked it over.
Boo-hoo-hoo. Great.
Copy !req
290. Todd, what are you
doing here?
Copy !req
291. I saw you fighting with Michael.
I thought there might be a problem.
Copy !req
292. Even though I really hope there's
not a problem. Is there a problem?
Copy !req
293. Yeah, I think so.
Copy !req
294. Well, you know what would
make you feel better?
Copy !req
295. Coming to see
a movie with me.
Copy !req
296. You know what? Yeah.
Copy !req
297. Yeah. Let's go.
Copy !req
298. Mr. Forman, Mrs. Forman.
How may I help you?
Copy !req
299. You could help me
by getting some pants on.
Copy !req
300. And for the lady?
Copy !req
301. I'll have what he's having.
Copy !req
302. Say, don't come
to my house anymore.
Copy !req
303. Go, honey, go!
Copy !req