1. Go!
Copy !req
2. Hold it
right there, Calculator.
Copy !req
3. Well,
well, the Teen Titans.
Copy !req
4. Why are you all laughing?
Copy !req
5. I'm sorry.
I know we're supposed to keep
it together and everything,
Copy !req
6. but that outfit is ridiculous.
Copy !req
7. Yeah, man, you can't put on
a bunch of school supplies,
Copy !req
8. and expect us
to take you serious.
Copy !req
9. Well, you should, because I can
compute complex algorithms,
Copy !req
10. in the blink of an eye
using this solar powered
super suit.
Copy !req
11. So let me get this straight.
Copy !req
12. You built yourself a super suit
that only works during
the day?
Copy !req
13. Listen, I don't have
to take this.
Copy !req
14. I have an evil plan
to get back to.
Copy !req
15. Well, your plan stops here.
Copy !req
16. Now, hand over the stolen tech.
Copy !req
17. Don't make us
take you down, dude.
Copy !req
18. Ha! I'd like to say you try.
Copy !req
19. I can calculate
your every move.
Copy !req
20. Oh, yeah?
Copy !req
21. Then calculate this.
Copy !req
22. Calculating acceleration.
Copy !req
23. Calculate this!
Copy !req
24. Calculating angle of attack.
Copy !req
25. Eat magic fist.
Copy !req
26. Calculating velocity.
Copy !req
27. Argh!
Copy !req
28. Ooh. My bad.
Copy !req
29. Ha! Too easy.
Copy !req
30. Oh, yeah. Then let's see
if you can dodge these
heat seeking missiles.
Copy !req
31. Calculating trajectory.
Copy !req
32. Oh, mans.
We can'ts even
touch this guy.
Copy !req
33. That's because only math
can defeat him.
Copy !req
34. No problem. We got this.
Copy !req
35. Okay. So if he's traveling
at 13 miles per hour,
Copy !req
36. and we're traveling
at 15 miles per hour,
Copy !req
37. at which point do our fists
hit his face?
Copy !req
38. Hmm. One, two... Hold on.
Copy !req
39. I'm going to need
a pen and paper.
Copy !req
40. Hook me up with some of that
loose leaf too, mama.
Copy !req
41. Come on, Titans, Hurry it up.
Copy !req
42. We are going as fast
as we can, Robin.
Copy !req
43. Okay. Just gotta double check our work and got it!
Copy !req
44. Oh, no, he got away.
Copy !req
45. Listen up, Titans.
Copy !req
46. If we're going to stop
The Calculator,
Copy !req
47. we need to become better
at math than he is.
Copy !req
48. But how is we supposed
to do that?
Copy !req
49. The dude is literally
a calculator.
Copy !req
50. It's simple.
Copy !req
51. Today, I'm going
to be teaching you
a new, faster method,
Copy !req
52. for doing mathematics,
known as Common Core math.
Copy !req
53. You are teaching us
the belly math, Robin?
Copy !req
54. We don't needs
to learn that, fool.
Copy !req
55. 'Cause we already knows
we got them good
six packs going on.
Copy !req
56. Check it.
Copy !req
57. The wash board,
the cheese grater,
Copy !req
58. the packs on packs
on packs on packs.
Copy !req
59. No, Titans.
Copy !req
60. Common Core math
doesn't have to do
with your core muscles.
Copy !req
61. It's a method of learning
that will help you all
become better at math.
Copy !req
62. Wait a minute.
I know what Robin's
talking about now.
Copy !req
63. He's trying to teach us
that math
Copy !req
64. the government made up
just to confuse people.
Copy !req
65. What?
Copy !req
66. Is that the true?
Copy !req
67. Yes, it's true
that Common Core math
Copy !req
68. was developed by
government educators
Copy !req
69. and has been given
a bad reputation from parents,
Copy !req
70. who are confused
by its methodology.
Copy !req
71. But I assure you, Titans,
you can handle it!
Copy !req
72. After all, six-year-olds
can understand
Common Core math.
Copy !req
73. And to demonstrate
how easy it is,
we shall start with the most
Copy !req
74. basic Common Core lesson,
the ten frame.
Copy !req
75. Ten frame? Like in bowling?
Copy !req
76. Bowling is the best, yo.
Copy !req
77. This isn't about bowling!
Copy !req
78. The ten frame is simply
a two by five rectangular grid,
Copy !req
79. into which circular counters
are drawn to demonstrate
Copy !req
80. numbers less than
or equal to ten.
Copy !req
81. Man, that's some straight up
gobbledygook right there.
Copy !req
82. I too, am confused
by the gooking of the gobbley.
Copy !req
83. So instead of us using numbers
we're supposed to draw circles?
Copy !req
84. I thoughts we were doing math,
not arts and crafts.
Copy !req
85. Don't get hung up
on the circles.
Copy !req
86. They're only there
to represent number values,
Copy !req
87. and can be whatever shape
you want them to be.
Copy !req
88. Oh, really?
Copy !req
89. Then can we change them
to your baby hands?
Copy !req
90. Ha, ha, ha.
Copy !req
91. No, you cannot change them
into baby hands.
Copy !req
92. But you said they could be
whatevers we wants.
Copy !req
93. And we choose the baby hands.
Copy !req
94. Baby hands!
Baby hands! Baby hands!
Copy !req
95. Stop! Gimme that!
Copy !req
96. We're just having
some fun, Robin.
Copy !req
97. Common Core math
isn't supposed to be fun.
Copy !req
98. It's supposed to be boring
and educational.
Copy !req
99. Now, let's forget about
the ten frame and move on.
Copy !req
100. But we still
haven't learned nothing, yo.
Copy !req
101. That's okay,
because I guarantee
you'll understand
Copy !req
102. this next Common Core lesson,
which uses line segments
as anchors.
Copy !req
103. Anchors? Like the ones
the pirates use?
Copy !req
104. Ooh! Robin is teaching us
pirate math.
Copy !req
105. Yeah, boy!
Copy !req
106. Argh! Let's use our pirate math
to divide up this treasure.
Copy !req
107. Here you go, lads.
One for you.
Copy !req
108. One for you and one for me.
Copy !req
109. Avast, the two doubloons do not
equal the shimmery necklace.
Copy !req
110. Argh! Are you trying
to cheat us, matey?
Copy !req
111. Nay! I would never
even dream of cheating
the likes of you.
Copy !req
112. Cheating you, he is!
Copy !req
113. We shall run you
through for this!
Copy !req
114. Stop, stop stop!
Copy !req
115. This lesson doesn't involve
filthy pirates!
Copy !req
116. These anchors are simply used
to break big numbers,
Copy !req
117. into smaller number bonds,
to simplify the problem.
Copy !req
118. Well, that problem doesn't
look simplified to me.
Copy !req
119. Indeed, it looks
the way more complicated.
Copy !req
120. Yeah, man, you can't be
adding in a bunch of numbers
all willy nilly like that.
Copy !req
121. It's super confusing, yo.
Copy !req
122. Look, the point of this lesson
is to help your brain visualize
number relationships.
Copy !req
123. Relationships?
Copy !req
124. So you want us
to date numbers now?
Copy !req
125. I would consider dating the two
but not the three.
Copy !req
126. Girlfriend!
Copy !req
127. For the three
is the odd number.
Copy !req
128. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Copy !req
129. Listen, Titans!
Copy !req
130. If you want to stop
The Calculator,
Copy !req
131. you need to take
this Common Core
math stuff seriously.
Copy !req
132. But we are taking it
the seriously, Robin.
Copy !req
133. Then why aren't you guys
getting this?
Copy !req
134. Because this math
is overly complicated
and way too confusing.
Copy !req
135. All them parents was right.
Copy !req
136. No, they're not.
Copy !req
137. Six-year-olds can understand
Common Core math.
Copy !req
138. Wait a second.
Copy !req
139. Ah, that's it.
Copy !req
140. - What's it?
- You guys just need six-year-old brains.
Copy !req
141. - I can make that happen.
- Great.
Copy !req
142. Oh! I can talk like the goat.
Copy !req
143. The baa! The baa!
Copy !req
144. Look, look, look, look
how fast I can run!
Copy !req
145. Check out my dance!
Check out my dance! Hey!
Copy !req
146. What? I'm not touching you.
Copy !req
147. I'm not touching you.
Copy !req
148. See? I'm not touching you.
Copy !req
149. Ooh, look an apple.
Copy !req
150. High energy,
short attention spans.
Copy !req
151. Yup. You definitely have
the minds of six-year-olds.
Copy !req
152. Now let's see if you can learn
Common Core math.
Copy !req
153. Congratulations,
Titans!
Copy !req
154. You now have the one thing
no parent in America has.
Copy !req
155. A basic understanding
of Common Core math.
Copy !req
156. And it's turned
our six-year-old brains
into calcumalators.
Copy !req
157. Quick, Quick.
Give me the math problem.
Copy !req
158. Okay, Star.
Copy !req
159. What's the square root
of 2,130?
Copy !req
160. It's 46.15192304.
Copy !req
161. That's right!
Copy !req
162. Uh-oh. Crime alert.
Copy !req
163. What is it? What is it?
Copy !req
164. The Calculator has just been
spotted downtown.
Copy !req
165. Titans go.
Copy !req
166. Your number is up, Calculator.
Copy !req
167. Oh, good.
Copy !req
168. You Titans have arrived
just in time for the unveiling
of my master plan.
Copy !req
169. Behold.
Copy !req
170. The Earth Brake.
Copy !req
171. With this device,
Copy !req
172. I will stop the Earth
from rotating,
Copy !req
173. causing the sun to shine
endlessly on Jump City,
Copy !req
174. making my solar powered
suit unstoppable!
Copy !req
175. But if you do that,
temperatures will
skyrocket like...
Copy !req
176. And half of the Earth
will be the covered
in the darkness.
Copy !req
177. Those are calculated risks
I'm willing to take.
Copy !req
178. Well, you can forget it.
Copy !req
179. Please. You zeroes couldn't
stop me before.
Copy !req
180. What makes you think
you can stop me now?
Copy !req
181. Because now we got some
good six-year-old brains.
Copy !req
182. Which have totally made us
hard core for the Common Core.
Copy !req
183. Titans, go!
Calculate our attack.
Copy !req
184. Okay, okay, first I'll measure
the wind speed so I can
distract him with a spit ball.
Copy !req
185. Ooh, and then I shall calculate
his reaction time,
Copy !req
186. so I can blind him
with my stickers.
Copy !req
187. Oh, oh, oh, then on, then on,
then on my turn,
Copy !req
188. I'll figure out his distance
so I can hit him with
some water balloons.
Copy !req
189. And... And I'll determine
the force I need,
Copy !req
190. to trip him
with my toy car.
Copy !req
191. Finally, I'll finish him off
with a perfectly timed
flying kick.
Copy !req
192. Ha! Nice try.
Copy !req
193. But you're going to have to do
better than that to defeat me.
Copy !req
194. Those moves weren't meant
to defeat you.
Copy !req
195. No, they were only meant
to get you in the shade,
Copy !req
196. to power down your solar suit.
Copy !req
197. Ha. What?
Copy !req
198. No!
Copy !req
199. So what do we do with him now?
Copy !req
200. Oh, I know.
Copy !req
201. Look, look.
Copy !req
202. He's a bozo
Copy !req
203. Cut that out!
Copy !req
204. It's not funny.
Copy !req