1. Nothing is wrong with
your television.Copy !req
2. Do not attempt to change the channel.Copy !req
3. Your regularly scheduled program
will not be seen...Copy !req
4. because I am controlling
the transmission.Copy !req
5. I control the horizontal.Copy !req
6. I control the vertical.Copy !req
7. Those buttons on your remote
that don't seem to do anything...Copy !req
8. I know what they're for.Copy !req
9. From this moment on,
your television belongs to me...Copy !req
10. Control Freak.Copy !req
11. Uh, guys?Copy !req
12. In here. Hurry. Now.Copy !req
13. Beast Boy, what's the problem?Copy !req
14. The Mijo and Tito Show was a rerun, so I
flipped over to watch Danger Team Five.Copy !req
15. But it wasn't on because there was
this little blue dot and this: Beep!Copy !req
16. And this voice is like,
"I control the vertical."Copy !req
17. Then the dot got real big
and Control Freak has taken over our TV.Copy !req
18. Um...Copy !req
19. Welcome back to Bass Nabbers.Copy !req
20. Today we gonna catch us some fish.Copy !req
21. Dude, where did he go?Copy !req
22. He was right there
with the big face and...Copy !req
23. Uh, Beast Boy, maybe you've just been
watching a little too much television.Copy !req
24. TV rots your brains.Copy !req
25. Yeah, man. When was the last time
you turned off the tube?Copy !req
26. Um, I think I went out to the movies
three weeks ago.Copy !req
27. I wish to remind you that you did not
actually go to the movies...Copy !req
28. but merely observed a television program
about a person who went to the movies.Copy !req
29. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
30. That was cool.Copy !req
31. Right. Look, Beast Boy,
Control Freak can't be on TV.Copy !req
32. He's locked up in jail
where he belongs, remember?Copy !req
33. We interrupt this program
for breaking news.Copy !req
34. Authorities have just discovered
that the dangerous criminal...Copy !req
35. known as Control Freak
has escaped from prison.Copy !req
36. What did I say?Copy !req
37. Reports are coming in
from all over the city.Copy !req
38. Control Freak has been spotted on more
than a dozen TV screens in the last half hour.Copy !req
39. We need to find out where
he's broadcasting from and pull the plug.Copy !req
40. We've got a lock.Copy !req
41. Welcome home, dear.
Dinner's on the table.Copy !req
42. Shall I fetch your newspaper
and slippers?Copy !req
43. Golly, hon, that would be swell.Copy !req
44. But Rebecca...Copy !req
45. I'm still in love with your
reincarnated, evil half-sister.Copy !req
46. Oh, Joaquim.Copy !req
47. I must find my pet hippo.Copy !req
48. Please tell me where he went.Copy !req
49. Is he skipping through a meadow?Copy !req
50. Or camping in a tent?Copy !req
51. Dude, Clash of the Planets.
This is a classic.Copy !req
52. I don't care how powerful you are,
Baron Ryang.Copy !req
53. I won't let you win.Copy !req
54. Foolish human.Copy !req
55. Have you forgotten
that I control this star system?Copy !req
56. Have you forgotten that soon,
I shall control the entire universe.Copy !req
57. - Hello.
- Aah!Copy !req
58. Enjoying the show, Titans?Copy !req
59. Might as well just sit back and watch...Copy !req
60. because you're never gonna catch me.Copy !req
61. We will find out where you're hiding.Copy !req
62. It's only a matter of time.Copy !req
63. Who's hiding? I'm right here.
Heh, heh, heh.Copy !req
64. Or am I here? Or here?Copy !req
65. Or over here?Copy !req
66. Or maybe here?Copy !req
67. The Control Freak is a dork, yes?Copy !req
68. He's in the building. Find him.Copy !req
69. He's not inside the building.Copy !req
70. He's inside the TVs.Copy !req
71. We have the technology.Copy !req
72. Yes! Control Freak is on the air.
A- ha, ha, ha, ha!Copy !req
73. Well, that's one way
to break into television.Copy !req
74. He turned himself into
a broadcast waveform...Copy !req
75. and he's flipping
from channel to channel.Copy !req
76. Control Freak hasn't just escaped
from jail.Copy !req
77. - He's escaped from reality.
- Huh?Copy !req
78. Uh, guys?Copy !req
79. Cool.Copy !req
80. Got enough high-end equipment here
to break half the laws of physics.Copy !req
81. Can you reverse the process?
Pull him back out?Copy !req
82. Think so.
I just need a little time to... Aah!Copy !req
83. Aah!Copy !req
84. Well, hey, there, everybody.Copy !req
85. Hope you're as excited as I am,
because you're the next contestants on...Copy !req
86. Quiz Monkey.Copy !req
87. My bad.Copy !req
88. Okay. We need to find Control Freak
and get back out of... Aah!Copy !req
89. All right, young lady,
15 seconds on the clock.Copy !req
90. Each correct answer
wins a fabulous prize.Copy !req
91. Zero answers puts you in the cage
with the quiz monkey.Copy !req
92. - What's the capital of Liechtenstein?
- Uh...Copy !req
93. - When did Hannibal cross the Alps?
- Uh...Copy !req
94. - What was Spiro Agnew's middle name?
- Hmm...Copy !req
95. How many atoms in
1 kilogram of oxygen?Copy !req
96. Ah! 3.7625 times 10 to the 25th.Copy !req
97. That is correct.
You've just won a new car.Copy !req
98. Alrighty then, Titans.Copy !req
99. You followed me in.
Now let's see if you can keep up.Copy !req
100. Titans, go.Copy !req
101. In other news... Hey.Copy !req
102. Booyah energy drink.Copy !req
103. You're scaring the fish.Copy !req
104. End of the road.Copy !req
105. Tell that to them Hooten Boys.Copy !req
106. Waa-hoo!Copy !req
107. Don't move.Copy !req
108. Uh-oh. I'm still moving.Copy !req
109. Isn't there some word the good guys
are supposed to yell to make me stop?Copy !req
110. Freeze.Copy !req
111. Freeze?
That's today's sloppy mess word.Copy !req
112. And you know what that mean, kids.Copy !req
113. Oatmeal!Copy !req
114. I wouldn't stand there if I were you.Copy !req
115. Agent 257 to base.Copy !req
116. I have the Reynaldi device.Copy !req
117. Huh?Copy !req
118. Take him down.Copy !req
119. Face it, Titans. In the real world,
I may be just another geek...Copy !req
120. but in here, I'm the coolest.Copy !req
121. Where did he go?Copy !req
122. Perhaps he has flown away to someplace
less creepy and bad-smelling.Copy !req
123. Yeah. What kind of nasty old show
is this, anyhow?Copy !req
124. Ah...Copy !req
125. It Came From Jones Lake.
Dudes, I've seen this before.Copy !req
126. We're not in a TV show...Copy !req
127. we're in a monster movie.Copy !req
128. Chill out, y'all. This is TV.Copy !req
129. The monster's not real.
It's just some dude in a costume.Copy !req
130. That's not a costume.
Ah!Copy !req
131. That thing may be fake
in the real world...Copy !req
132. But it's way real in here.Copy !req
133. Then it's a good thing
he's not our target.Copy !req
134. We need to find Control Freak.Copy !req
135. Split up.Copy !req
136. The creature from Jones
Lake, 7Gorn 7 and the Off-world Outlaw.Copy !req
137. The most notorious villains
in television history.Copy !req
138. I suppose you're wondering
why I've brought you all here.Copy !req
139. The answer is quite simple.
Using all of your awesome powers...Copy !req
140. I command you to seek out
the Teen Titans...Copy !req
141. and annihilate them.Copy !req
142. So cool.Copy !req
143. Master Hagadesch of the classic
mini-series Invasion X.Copy !req
144. I am ready to begin the training.Copy !req
145. I already told you,
I don't have time for this.Copy !req
146. Don't chicken out now, mate.Copy !req
147. The world's watching Stuntfest
to see eye-popping stunts...Copy !req
148. and that's just what they're gonna get.
- I'm not going to... Aah!Copy !req
149. Huh?Copy !req
150. Aah!Copy !req
151. Oh, Lance.Copy !req
152. I didn't mean to make you
fall madly in love with me.Copy !req
153. But ever since Joaquim left
with my evil half-sister...Copy !req
154. Yo, I don't love you,
my name's not Lance...Copy !req
155. and I just need to know if you've seen
a fat guy in an overcoat.Copy !req
156. Oh, Lance.Copy !req
157. What the...?Copy !req
158. Hello? Anybody?Copy !req
159. Nice.Copy !req
160. Oh! That had to hurt.
Let's look at the replay, Chuck.Copy !req
161. I'm not sure why a Teen Titan
is on the field in a championship game...Copy !req
162. but this is just a great defensive play
by the Steel City Tigers.Copy !req
163. Would you like some more flapjacks,
dear?Copy !req
164. Totally. I mean...Copy !req
165. gee whiz, Mom, that would be keen.Copy !req
166. Say, sport...Copy !req
167. it says in the paper that your schoolmates
are organizing a nifty sock hop.Copy !req
168. Oh, that must be the milkman.Copy !req
169. Jeepers.Copy !req
170. Oh, have you seen my hippo?
He hides and I must seek.Copy !req
171. I cannot play.Copy !req
172. Please, do you know a strange man
named Control Freak?Copy !req
173. He is big, not tall and nasty...Copy !req
174. and known for causing strife.Copy !req
175. He escaped into the TV.Copy !req
176. Hey, Star, run for your life!Copy !req
177. Next on Stuntfest.Copy !req
178. I'm gonna make this angry grizzly
give me a piggyback...Copy !req
179. Puh.Copy !req
180. - Thanks.
- Don't thank us yet.Copy !req
181. We brought a friend.Copy !req
182. The makers
of Azarath and Metrion...Copy !req
183. are proud to introduce Zinthos.Copy !req
184. New and improved Zinthos gives you
exactly what you need...Copy !req
185. exactly when you need it.Copy !req
186. And because it's blue,
Zinthos goes with everything.Copy !req
187. Zinthos isn't right for everyone.Copy !req
188. May cause bloating, cramping, hair loss,
visions, rage and growth of additional eyes.Copy !req
189. Children under 3 should not be exposed.Copy !req
190. Do not get wet,
and never feed it after midnight.Copy !req
191. Trouble meditating,
stop saying Zinthos...Copy !req
192. and consult your ancient scrolls
immediately.Copy !req
193. New blue Zinthos.Copy !req
194. Dude, those were three of the baddest
bad guys ever.Copy !req
195. And we totally kicked their butts.Copy !req
196. But we still haven't found Control Freak.Copy !req
197. True, grasshopper.
But I have found you.Copy !req
198. And guess what.Copy !req
199. I know kung fu. Whoa!Copy !req
200. I'm not just some nerd
you can push around anymore.Copy !req
201. Thanks to the magic of television,
I now possess a black belt in astro-jitsu...Copy !req
202. the Bionic Hero's rocket boots...Copy !req
203. Benthar's wristbands of power...Copy !req
204. and Captain Kaleel's
infamous gravoblaster.Copy !req
205. And in English?Copy !req
206. He's one seriously bad dude.Copy !req
207. Hasta la vista, Titans.Copy !req
208. And when the
chocolate has melted, we add the snails.Copy !req
209. I cannot work in these conditions.Copy !req
210. Oh, hippo, my hippo,
I have missed you so.Copy !req
211. Engage.Copy !req
212. Well, at least things can't get any worse.Copy !req
213. This just in.Copy !req
214. Interference by the criminal
Control Freak...Copy !req
215. has caused televisions
throughout the city...Copy !req
216. to emit harmful alpha-waves,
which disrupt the neural pathways...Copy !req
217. of anyone watching the broadcast.Copy !req
218. Huh?Copy !req
219. TV literally rots your brains.Copy !req
220. Told you.Copy !req
221. My guest tonight is Dr. Victor Payton...Copy !req
222. who has discovered the secret
to world peace.Copy !req
223. Tell me, doctor... Aah!Copy !req
224. Do not watch this program.Copy !req
225. It will liquefy your brain.Copy !req
226. An escaped criminal has tampered
with this transmission...Copy !req
227. and it is imperative that you turn off
your television right now.Copy !req
228. I'm serious. Stop watching this show.Copy !req
229. I don't think they're listening.Copy !req
230. Of course, they're not listening.
Breaking news, escaped criminals...Copy !req
231. a handsome green heartthrob.Copy !req
232. This stuff is ratings gold.Copy !req
233. If people won't turn off their TVs...Copy !req
234. there's only one way to save
millions of viewers.Copy !req
235. We've gotta stop Control Freak fast.Copy !req
236. But how are we to do this?Copy !req
237. Inside the television, he is more powerful
than Glorthrok the all-seeing.Copy !req
238. Yeah, the dude knows everything
in here.Copy !req
239. Hello.Copy !req
240. He's not the only one
who's watched too much TV.Copy !req
241. I've wasted my whole life in front
of the tube and it's about to pay off.Copy !req
242. Come on.Copy !req
243. - Five hundred channels.
- And still nothing on.Copy !req
244. He could be anywhere.Copy !req
245. There. The Space Network is having
a Clash of the Planets marathon.Copy !req
246. If I was Control Freak, and I am so glad
I'm not, that's where I'd be.Copy !req
247. Please, this Clash of the Planets is...?Copy !req
248. Only the greatest sci-fi series ever made.Copy !req
249. For an entire generation of fans,
it's not just a TV show...Copy !req
250. it's a way of life.Copy !req
251. Mura Kam has taught you well.Copy !req
252. This ends now.Copy !req
253. On the contrary...Copy !req
254. my reign of evil has just begun.Copy !req
255. I shall never be defeated. Nev...Copy !req
256. Who are you?Copy !req
257. I am Count Rol Freako...Copy !req
258. the 12th-level space samurai
who trained Baron Ryang.Copy !req
259. And I am your father.Copy !req
260. No!Copy !req
261. Hey, I remember this scene.Copy !req
262. We're in the first episode of Season 4.Copy !req
263. How do you know
we're going the right way?Copy !req
264. Because we just passed the engine core.
We're right below the detention level.Copy !req
265. All we have to do is follow
the main particle flux conduit...Copy !req
266. to the galactic command center.Copy !req
267. Frightening. Truly frightening.Copy !req
268. Identify yourselves.Copy !req
269. You don't need to see our identification.Copy !req
270. Worth a shot. Aah!Copy !req
271. Titans, go.Copy !req
272. There can be only one.Copy !req
273. Your powers are insignificant
next to the power of Control Freak.Copy !req
274. I don't care how tough you are, dude.Copy !req
275. There's no way I'm letting you win.Copy !req
276. Foolish, snot-colored human.Copy !req
277. Have you forgotten
that I am a 12th-level space samurai?Copy !req
278. Have you forgotten that in here
I control the universe?Copy !req
279. No, but I've seen every episode
of this show like 300 times.Copy !req
280. And I think you've forgotten
that a 12th-level space samurai...Copy !req
281. can be banished to the null dimensions
by the Hak Joon Chant.Copy !req
282. Aah! No!Copy !req
283. But... But...Copy !req
284. But this is my world.Copy !req
285. I'm cool here.Copy !req
286. - You guys can't win.
- Dude, this is television.Copy !req
287. The good guys always win.Copy !req
288. And you are so not the good guys.Copy !req
289. Please tell me you know
how to get us home.Copy !req
290. Well, I guess this whole experience proves
it really is bad to watch too much TV.Copy !req
291. But truthfully, we only prevailed because
Beast Boy watches too much the television.Copy !req
292. - So there really isn't a lesson here.
Yep.Copy !req
293. It was all completely meaningless.Copy !req