Tales from the Crypt 4x9

Directed by Joel Silver

Burt Young as Gambler • Jacqueline Alexandra Citron as April Dobbs Blair • Kristen Amber Citron as June Echeson Blair • Heidi Thomas as Prostitute • Michael Klastorin as Cashier

Stetson is a con man who likes to date twins. He finds himself in the arms of twin sisters and creates a twin of his own. He weds both of them and decides to knock them off. Little does he know these twins share alike.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.

2. AH HA HA HA HA HA!

3. STELLA!

4. STELLA!

5. OH! HELLO, PLAGUE GOERS.

6. I WAS JUST REHEARSING WITH MY LITTLE THEATER GROUP.

7. I JUST LOVE THE SLIMELIGHT.

8. FOR TONIGHT'S DREARY DRAMA,

9. I THOUGHT WE'D TRY AN EXSCARIMENTAL PIECE

10. ABOUT A RETIRED DRAG RACER

11. WHO'S AFRAID OF GETTING TO THE FINISHED LINE

12. A LITTLE SOONER THAN HE WANTS.

13. I CALL THIS NASTY NUGGET...

14. KING OF THE ROAD.

15. OH, YEAH!

16. HEY, HEY! REV IT, MAN!

17. WHOO HOO HOO HOO!

18. SEE YOU LATER, DADDY.

19. WILL YOU BE BY TONIGHT?

20. PROBABLY. YOU GOT A RIDE HOME?

21. NO, BUT I WILL.

22. HELLO, DOWN THERE.

23. I'M TRYING TO TRACK DOWN THIS OLD BOY

24. SUPPOSED TO LIVE AROUND HERE.

25. WHO IS THAT?

26. I HAVEN'T ACTUALLY MET HIM YET.

27. BEEN KIND OF HARD TO TRACK DOWN.

28. SWEET CAR. IS THIS YOURS?

29. IT'S MY DAUGHTER'S. MINE'S OUT IN THE FRONT.

30. YOU'RE PUTTING SOME MUSCLE INTO THIS SWEETHEART,

31. I LIKE THAT.

32. I BEST BE HITTIN' THE ROAD, I APPRECIATE YOUR TIME.

33. YOU DIDN'T TELL ME WHO YOU'RE LOOKING FOR.

34. WELL, HE'S A REAL SMART GUY,

35. REAL FAST GUY.

36. SO THEY SAY.

37. WHAT'S HIS NAME?

38. ICEMAN.

39. HI, DADDY.

40. HI, SWEETIE.

41. THE USUAL?

42. YEAH. THANKS, SWEETHEART.

43. BE BACK IN A MINUTE.

44. O.K., BABY.

45. I'LL BE A SNAKE ON SUNDAY.

46. POP IN HERE, WHO I DO I SEE? THE ICEMAN.

47. HOW YOU DOING?

48. YOU GOT SOME NAMES AND FACES CONFUSED, COWBOY.

49. THE NAME'S JOE...

50. JOE GARRETT.

51. YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE MODEST, ICEMAN.

52. YOU... YOU'RE A LEGEND.

53. I'VE HEARD STORIES ABOUT YOU.

54. NEVER LOST A RACE, EIGHT YEARS STRAIGHT.

55. KING OF THE ROAD.

56. TOO BAD IT HAD TO END THE WAY IT DID.

57. I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

58. BUT I DON'T LIKE YOU.

59. HEY, I DON'T MEAN NOTHING BY IT.

60. I'M SORRY.

61. BUT, YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE SO COOL?

62. IF I COULD GET A CHANCE TO SHARE SOME ROAD WITH YOU,

63. A STRAIGHT QUARTER-MILE.

64. YOU GOT THE WRONG GUY.

65. UNIT 14, SEE THE MAN,

66. MAIN AND SIXTH. CODE 3.

67. HI.

68. HI.

69. HE HAD TO TAKE OFF.

70. IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME.

71. WHY DON'T YOU TAKE IT?

72. YOU GOT YOUR DAD'S EYES.

73. WILL YOU COME BY TOMORROW?

74. YEAH, I'LL COME.

75. ON THE HOUSE.

76. GUESS I OWE YOU ONE.

77. GUESS YOU DO.

78. COMIN' TONIGHT?

79. MMHM.

80. COME ON, ICEMAN.

81. WHERE ARE YOU?

82. I'M IN PURSUIT OF A 1969 CHEVY,

83. I-V-B-N-5-3-6.

84. GIVE ME A MAKE.

85. ROGER, UNIT 14.

86. SUSPECT IS WILLIAM H. DRAKE. LIVES IN TACKFORD.

87. HAS A LONG RAP SHEET...

88. RECKLESS DRIVING, ASSAULT,

89. AND A MANSLAUGHTER CHARGE THAT DIDN'T STICK.

90. HE'S THE HOTTEST STREET RACER THERE.

91. YOU NEED ANY BACKUP, GARRETT?

92. NEGATIVE. THIS ONE'S MINE.

93. ROGER, UNIT 14.

94. YOU'RE A 10-7 AT THAT LOCATION.

95. HAVE A NICE DAY OFF, GARRETT.

96. CAREY?

97. DADDY!

98. HI, JOE.

99. UH!

100. DADDY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

101. STAY AWAY FROM HIM, CAREY.

102. NO! WHY ARE YOU HITTING HIM?

103. NOTHING HAPPENED! I BROUGHT HER HOME.

104. THAT'S ALL!

105. DON'T HIT HIM AGAIN!

106. GET OUT OF MY WAY! HE'S USING YOU.

107. COME ON, JOE. THAT'S IT!

108. GO TO YOUR ROOM.

109. IT'S ALL RIGHT, CAREY, I'LL GO.

110. THEN I'M COMING WITH YOU.

111. THE HELL YOU ARE, MOVE!

112. BILLY!

113. AH, COME ON, JOE!

114. COME ON THIS IS GETTING OLD.

115. YOU CAN'T ARREST ME, MAN.

116. COME ON!

117. DO YOU KNOW HOW BAD IT WILL BE

118. WHEN MIDDLETON FINDS OUT ONE OF ITS FINEST

119. HAS BEEN DODGING A MANSLAUGHTER CHARGE

120. FOR 27 YEARS, JOE?

121. HUH?

122. A SINGLE PARENT, TOO, JOE.

123. IF YOU GET 5 TO 10...

124. WHO'S GOING TO TAKE CARE OF CAREY?

125. AW, DON'T LOOK SO DOWN, JOE.

126. YOU'RE TEARING ME UP, HERE.

127. YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN

128. I'D COME ALONG SOONER OR LATER.

129. BE A MAN ABOUT IT.

130. JUST...

131. JUST THINK OF ME AS YOUR KARMA, JOE.

132. HA HA HA!

133. KARMA?

134. O.K.

135. JUST YOU AND ME ON THE STARTING LINE, JOE.

136. THAT'S ALL.

137. YEAH.

138. THAT'S ALL.

139. BILLY, WAIT.

140. I'M COMING WITH YOU.

141. HOP IN, BEAUTIFUL.

142. HOW YOU DOING, BILLY?

143. GLAD YOU COULD MAKE IT, JOE.

144. YOU WANT TO RACE, BILLY?

145. YOU NAME THE PLACE. I'LL NAME THE TIME.

146. ALL RIGHT.

147. AIRSTRIP OUTSIDE OF TOWN.

148. TOMORROW NIGHT.

149. MIDNIGHT.

150. NOW, WHERE'S MY DAUGHTER?

151. OH, YOUR DAUGHTER.

152. WELL, JOE,

153. TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR DAUGHTER.

154. SHE WAS STARTING TO GET A REAL BAD ATTITUDE.

155. WOMEN, HUH?

156. WELL, IT DON'T MATTER.

157. NOTHING A FEW CHAINS COULDN'T HANDLE.

158. FITS PERFECTLY BACK THERE,

159. JUST LIKE A LITTLE SPARE TIRE.

160. WHOA!

161. NOW'S NOT THE TIME TO LOSE OUR COOL, ICEMAN.

162. WON'T DO ANY OF US ANY GOOD.

163. AH, JOE, I HATE TO TREAT YOU LIKE THIS.

164. YOU THINK I'M JUST GOING TO HAND HER OVER TO YOU

165. EXPECTING YOU TO SHOW UP.

166. I CAN'T SEE IT.

167. WHAT ARE YOU SAYING, BILLY?

168. I'M SAYS SHE'S THE STAKES.

169. YOU WIN, YOU GET HER BACK.

170. AND IF I LOSE.

171. I'LL HAVE TO KILL HER WON'T I.

172. AND JOE, I WOULDN'T GO TO ANY OF YOUR COP BUDDIES.

173. BECAUSE I'M NOT ONLY SMART

174. BUT I'M CRAZY.

175. HEY, OLD BUDDY.

176. HOLY MOSES!

177. I DON'T BELIEVE IT.

178. JOE, IS IT REALLY YOU?

179. IT'S ME, MAN.

180. HA HA HA!

181. EIGHT BALLS IN HELL I KNEW YOU'D COME BACK.

182. ONE DAY I SAID HE'S GONE COME RIDING OUT OF OBLIVION,

183. JUST LIKE SHANE, AND THAT ROAD IS GONNA BURN!

184. MOE, I GOTTA KNOW, IS SHE STILL THERE?

185. I POLISHED HER UP EVERY SIX MONTHS LIKE CLOCKWORK,

186. THINKING YOU MIGHT COME BACK.

187. KEPT HER TUNED UP, TOO!

188. NEXT IN LINE.

189. JOE, YOU OLD DOG.

190. I KNEW YOU HAD THIS PUPPY STOWED SOMEWHERE.

191. YOU READY, BILLY?

192. OH, YEAH.

193. HAD SOME FUN, DIDN'T WE, SWEETHEART?

194. GO ON.

195. GIVE IT TO CAREY.

196. NO, CAREY.

197. GET IN FRONT OF THE CARS.

198. WHEN WE FLASH OUR BRIGHTS,

199. RAISE THE GUN AND FIRE ONCE IN THE AIR.

200. DADDY, ARE YOU CRAZY?

201. DO IT.

202. YOU KNOW, BILLY, YOU WIN, YOU GO FREE.

203. AND IF I LOSE?

204. I'LL KILL YOU.

205. I RESPECT YOU, JOE.

206. NO!

207. LOOKS LIKE YOU WIN, ICEMAN.

208. WRONG.

209. WELL, THAT CERTAINLY GIVES NEW MEANING

210. TO THE TERM "BURN RUBBER." HEE HEE HEE!

211. AS FOR ME, I'VE GOT TO GET BACK TO WORK.

212. THE GROUP HAS DECIDED TO DO SOMETHING CLASSICAL.

213. WE'RE TRYING TO CHOOSE

214. BETWEEN A MIDSUMMER-NIGHT'S SCREAM

215. AND GHOULIUS CAESAR.

216. HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE!

217. CARE TO WATCH FROM HACKSTAGE?

218. AH HA HA HA HA!

219. YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, KIDDIES...

220. THE SLAY'S THE THING.

221. AH HA HA HA HA HA!

222. CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.

223. CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE... www.ncicap.org...

224. PUBLIC PERFORMANCE OF CAPTIONS PROHIBITED WITHOUT

225. PERMISSION OF NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE