Strangers with Candy 2x4

Directed by Peter Lauer

Roberto Gari as Guy Blank • Deborah Rush as Sara Blank • Larc Spies as Derrick Blank • Orlando Pabotoy as Orlando Pinatubo • Maria Christina Thayer as Tammi Littlenut

Jerri suffers a devastating loss and can find no sympathy for her grief, though Mr. Jellineck chips in with his special blend of self-important empathy. The Father-Daughter Sack Race plays a pivotal role in this Very Special Episode.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

2. WAY TO GO, MR. PINATUBO!

3. YOU TWO ARE LIKE A COUPLE OF CHIMPS!

4. WE'RE GONNA BE HARD TO BEAT AT THIS YEAR'S

5. INTER-SCHOOL FATHER-STUDENT RACE.

7. SUCK MY D, YOU MANGY DOGS!

8. DAMN THOSE MOUNT VALLEY RABID DOGS!

9. THEY BEAT US EVERY YEAR,

10. BUT NOT THIS YEAR!

11. UH-HUH.

12. GREAT SACK, ORLANDO!

13. YEAH, MY FATHER BOUGHT IT FOR ME.

14. LOOKS LIKE YOU CAN USE A NEW ONE.

15. I'M SURE MY DADDY WILL GET ME A NEW SACK.

16. WHERE'S YOUR DAD, JERRI?

17. AREN'T YOU TWO SUPPOSE TO PRACTICE?

18. HE'S NOT HERE YET.

19. AGAIN, JERRI?

20. HE'LL SHOW UP.

21. UNLESS HE GOT RUN DOWN BY A TRUCK.

22.

23. DADDY!

24. DADDY'S HERE!

25. OH DADDY, I KNOW WE HAVEN'T SPENT MUCH TIME TOGETHER LATELY,

26. WHAT WITH YOU WORKING SO HARD

27. AND ME RUNNING AWAY FOR 32 YEARS,

28. BUT ALL THAT'S GONNA CHANGE WITH THIS RACE!

29. BOY, I'M THIRSTY...

30. I'M GONNA GO GET A HOT DOG.

31. WHY DON'T YOU PRACTICE HOPPING AROUND BY YOURSELF.

32. WHEW!

33. HEY, GIVE ME A DIABLO DOG,

34. DRAG IT THROUGH THE SALT,

35. AND DON'T BE STINGY WITH THE BACON BITS...

36. TODAY!

37. GEE, I UH...

38. I'M FRESH OUT OF CASH...

39. I WONDER HOW I'LL PAY YOU FOR THIS?

40. ( tires screeching, horn honking )

41. DADDY!

42. OH!

43.

44. DADDY!

45. DADDY, NOOOOOOOOOOO!

46.

47. HELLO, I'M JERRI BLANK.

48. 32 YEARS AGO I DROPPED OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL

49. AND RAN AWAY FROM HOME.

50. OH, I MADE A LOT OF FRIENDS,

51. DID A LOT OF TIME.

52. I WAS A BOOZER, A USER, AND A LOSER.

53. I STOLE THE TV.

54. DID SOME MORE TIME.

55. BUT NOW I'M BACK IN SCHOOL!

56. AND THOUGH THE FACES MAY HAVE CHANGED...

57. THE HASSLES ARE JUST THE SAME.

58. MRS. BLANK, KIDS.

59. AH, DOCTOR, I HOPE YOU HAVE SOME GOOD NEWS ABOUT MY HUSBAND.

60. THIS IS THE HARDEST PART OF MY JOB.

61. I'VE DONE IT A THOUSAND TIMES

62. AND IT JUST KEEPS GETTING EASIER.

63. WHAT'S LEFT OF YOUR HUSBAND IS DEAD.

64. OH MY...

65.

66. YYYELLO?

67. YEAH, THIS IS HE.

68. WHAT!

69. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!

70. YES, THAT'S NOTHING SHORT OF A MIRACLE!

71. OHHH!

72. THE MUSTANGS WON!

73. I HAD A LOT OF MONEY DOWN.

74. NOW WHERE WERE WE?

75. OH, RIGHT... UH, YOUR HUSBAND IS DEAD.

76. AND WHAT ARE THE ODDS HE MIGHT RECOVER?

77. A MILLION TO ZERO, JERRI.

78. YOUR FATHER IS GONE.

79. WELL, HE'S GOT TO RECOVER!

80. THIS WAS OUR TIME TO GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER.

81. THE ONLY THING YOU NEED TO KNOW

82. IS THAT HE'S DEAD.

83. I'M SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.

84. DOCTOR, CAN'T YOU FIX MY DADDY?

85. LITTLE GIRL, I WISH I COULD.

86. YOUR FATHER WAS DEAD ON ARRIVAL.

87. NO MATTER WHAT I DID

88. HE JUST KEPT GETTING DEADER.

89. WELL, MAYBE THERE'S A MISTAKE.

90. JERRI, I— I MAY NOT KNOW HOW TO CURE PEOPLE,

91. BUT I DO KNOW DEATH WHEN I SEE IT.

92. I OUGHT TO...

93. I'M AN ORTHODONTIST.

94. I CAN'T WAIT TO GO HEAD-TO-HEAD

95. WITH MOUNT VALLEY IN THE SACK RACE.

96. OH, I CAN JUST TASTE THAT GOLDEN SACK.

97. IT'S GONNA FIT NICELY IN MY TROPHY CASE.

98. YOU KNOW, SPEAKING OF MOUNT VALLEY,

99. EVIDENTLY, JERRI BLANK'S FATHER

100. WAS EATEN BY A PACK OF RABID DOGS.

101. FOR SOME REASON SHE'S NOT TAKING IT WELL.

102. WHAT!

103. I HOPE THAT GRIEVING STUDENT HAD THE GOOD SENSE

104. TO KEEP IT TO HERSELF.

105. WE NEED OUR SCHOOL SPIRIT!

106. CASSIE, YOU'RE OUR STUDENT COUNSELOR,

107. WHAT DO YOU THINK?

108. WELL, NATURALLY, AS STUDENT COUNSELOR,

109. MY FIRST RESPONSIBILITY IS TO THE TEACHERS.

110. I THINK THEY'RE GOING TO BE O.K.

111. WELL, GOOD, BUT KEEP AN EYE ON THE SITUATION.

112. I DON'T WANT MY STUDENTS WORRIED ABOUT

113. WHOSE DADDY IS GOING TO DROP NEXT.

114. GRIEF IS THE SORT OF THING

115. THAT SPREADS LIKE V.D. AT SUMMER CAMP.

116. WHY CAN'T THESE THINGS HAPPEN OVER THE BREAK?

117. DAMN, MY BOYS ARE COOKING!

118.

119. AHHH...

120. POOR JERRI, WHAT MUST IT BE LIKE TO LOSE YOUR FATHER?

121. OH HEY, KIDS, HOW ARE YA DOING?

122. AND HOW AM I?

123. YOU LOOK OKAY.

124. NO, I'M JUST PUTTING UP A BRAVE SHELL.

125. IT'S JUST... YOU KNOW.

126. THIS WHOLE THING IS MAKING ME THINK ABOUT MY DADDY

127. AND WHEN HE...

128. DROPPED ME OFF TODAY WE WERE TALKING ABOUT HIS FATHER—

129. MY GRAND DAD— AND HOW UPSET HE IS ABOUT HIS FATHER,

130. MY GREAT-GRAND PAPA.

131. EVIDENTLY HE ISN'T DOING SO WELL.

132. HE'S GETTING SO OLD.

133. IT'S OKAY, MR. JELLINECK.

134. NO!

135. I AM GONNA FEEL THESE FEELINGS!

136. HI, EVERYBODY!

137. OH HEY, JERRI, WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT ME.

138. OH, AND HOW ARE YOU DOING?

139. HOW DO I LOOK?

140. JERRI, I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT WHEN YOU EXPERIENCE LOSS,

141. IT'S IMPORTANT TO FEEL.

142. GRIEVE, JERRI, IT'S O.K.

143. I AM GRIEVING.

144. NO...

145. THIS— THIS IS GRIEVING.

146. RIGHT.

147. SAY, ORLANDO, DO YOU WANT TO COME WITH ME?

148. I HAVE TO SIGN UP FOR THE FATHER/STUDENT SACK RACE.

149. I DON'T MEAN TO SEEM INSENSITIVE,

150. BUT WASN'T YOUR FATHER TORN TO SHREDS BY WILD DOGS?

151. BUT HE PROMISED ME THAT WE'D SPEND SOME MORE TIME TOGETHER.

152. JERRI, YOU'RE IN DENIAL.

153. YOUR DADDY IS DEAD.

154.

155. MAYBE I AM IN DENIAL.

156. UNLESS, OF COURSE...

157. HE'S ALIVE!

158. OH, UH, PRINCIPAL BLACKMAN!

159. WHAT BRINGS YOU TO OUR CELEBRATORY WAKE?

160. MY MOTHER PREPARED THIS JELLO MOLD,

161. IT WOULD MEAN A LOT TO HER IF YOU ATE IT.

162. I'LL PUT IT WITH THE OTHER JELLO'S.

163.

164. I JUST WANTED TO SAY I'M REALLY ADMIRING

165. THE WAY JERRI HAS BEEN IGNORING THIS WHOLE... BUSINESS.

166. THANK YOU FOR YOUR LOVELY SENTIMENTS, MR. BLACKMAN,

167. BUT I SHOULD TELL YOU THAT GUY'S LAST WISH

168. WAS THAT NO... DARKIES ATTEND HIS WAKE.

169. I UNDERSTAND.

170. I KNEW YOU WOULD.

171. MY GOD, GEOFFERY, PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER.

172. HEY, THEY'VE GOT CHOW.

173. HOW CAN YOU THINK ABOUT FOOD WHEN I'M IN THIS MUCH PAIN?

174. THIS IS HOW I DEAL WITH YOUR GRIEF, GEOFFREY, I EAT.

175. NOW IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME,

176. I'M GONNA GO DISCUSS YOUR SADNESS

177. WITH THAT PORK LOIN.

178. HEY!

179. YOU DID A WONDERFUL JOB ON MY GUY.

180. OH, HE WAS DEFINITELY A CHALLENGE.

181. WHEN I GOT HIM, HE LOOKED LIKE

182. A BLIND MAN'S JACK-O'-LANTERN.

183. SO I TOOK A DEEP BREATH,

184. GRABBED A TUB OF PUTTY AND A TROWEL,

185. AND FROM THERE... IT WAS SIMPLY SHARPEI!

186. SHARPEI!

187. JERRI!

188. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ALONE?

189. JUST MENDING MY SACK FOR THE BIG RACE.

190. LISTEN TO ME, JERRI...

191. I WAS JUST PAWING AT YOUR DEAD FATHER A MOMENT AGO,

192. AND IT REALLY HELPED.

193. YOU KNOW, I THINK I SAW HIM TODAY.

194. HE WAS WAITING FOR A BUS AND I SCREAMED,

195. "DADDY, DADDY, YOU'RE NOT DEAD!"

196. BUT I THINK HE HAD TO GO SOMEWHERE,

197. BECAUSE HE RAN AWAY REALLY FAST.

198. JERRI!

199. MOST OF YOUR DADDY IS IN THE BELLY OF A DOG.

200. IF I COULD ACCEPT YOUR FATHER'S DEATH

201. WHY CAN'T YOU?

202. GOTTA FINISH THIS SACK...

203. WOULD YOU TAKE ONE, TAMMI...

204. CAN I GET SOME GRAVY FOR THESE POTATOES?

205. THEY'RE A LITTLE DRY.

206. SHHH!

207. WELL, THEY ARE!

208. I CAN'T DO THIS.

209. I SHAN'T.

210. YOU CAN, YOU MUST.

211. NO... !

212. NO...

213. OH, THE SKIN—

214. IT'S SO COLD AND SCALY.

215. THE VEINS ARE LIKE EARTHWORMS BATTLING FOR ATTENTION.

216. THE CLAWS, THEY'RE—

217. OH, THAT'S MY HAND.

218. IT'S JUST A LITTLE DRY.

219. OH DADDY!

220. DADDY, YOU'RE DEAD!

221. AND NOW I'LL NEVER REALLY KNOW YOU!

222.

223. HMMM...

224. OH...

225. AHHH...

226. THESE DON'T TELL ME ANYTHING ABOUT HIM.

227.

228.

229.

230.

231. HA HA! HA HA! HA HA!

232. THANKS.

233. AS YOU CAN SEE, THROUGHOUT HISTORY

234. WHAT THE CLOWN DOES IS HE TAKES SOMETHING TRAGIC

235. SUCH AS—

236. JERRI, YOU'RE LATE.

237. I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD EXCUSE.

238. MY DADDY DIED.

239. WHOSE DIDN'T, JERRI?

240. HAVE A SEAT.

241. WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT MIRTH AND MERRIMENT.

242.

243. HA HA! HA HA! HA HA!

244. THE CLASSIC HARLEQUIN CLOWN WAS THE MISCHIEVOUS TRICKSTER,

245. ALWAYS STIRRING UP THE POT.

246. NOW I'M SURE YOU'VE ALL HAD

247. SOME PRETTY AMUSING EXPERIENCES WITH CLOWNS.

248. ANYONE CARE TO SHARE ONE?

249. THERE WAS THIS ONE TIME

250. I WAS GOING TO THE ANNUAL DANCE DANCE,

251. THE THEME THAT YEAR WAS DANCING, AND MY DADDY WAS GONNA CHAPERON

252. BUT HE HAD TO WORK LATE.

253. THE POINT IS HE NEVER SHOWED UP,

254. AND NOW HE'S NEVER GONNA.

255. OKAY, ANYBODY ELSE CARE TO SHARE?

256. MAYBE A STORY INVOLVING CLOWNS?

257. THIS ONE TIME, DADDY AND I WENT TO THE CIRCUS,

258. AND JUST WHEN WE ENTERED THE BIG TOP,

259. THIS GUY WIRE CAME LOOSE AND SNAPPED AROUND LIKE A BULL WHIP

260. SLICING THIS ONE CLOWN, "BOGGLES," IN TWO.

261. AND JUST BEFORE HE DIED, HIS TOP HALF SAID,

262. "LET ME SEE MY WIFE AND CHILDREN."

263. LIFE'S LIKE THAT—

264. ONE MOMENT YOU'RE PLANNING ON SPENDING

265. SOME QUALITY TIME WITH YOUR DADDY,

266. AND THE NEXT MINUTE YOU'RE WATCHING TWO SMALL DEAD CLOWNS.

267. JERRI, CAN I SEE YOU IN THE HALLWAY PLEASE?

268.

269. LISTEN, JERRI.

270. STUDENTS LOOK FORWARD TO MY CLOWN CLASS ALL YEAR LONG

271. AND I DON'T APPRECIATE YOU COMING IN THERE

272. AND PISSING ALL OVER MY GLEE.

273. NOW I KNOW YOU'RE UPSET, BUT IT'S BEEN TWO DAYS.

274. YOU NEED TO MOVE ON.

275. I CAN'T MOVE ON, MY DADDY'S DEAD,

276. AND I'LL NEVER GET TO KNOW HIM.

277. NEVER!

278. I KNOW YOU'VE LOST YOUR FATHER,

279. BUT EVERYBODY HAS LOST A FATHER.

280. OH, HAVE YOU LOST YOUR FATHER?

281. NO, DON'T EVEN JOKE ABOUT THAT!

282. MY DADDY WILL NEVER DIE!

283. DO YOU HEAR ME, GOD?

284. NEVER!

285. THEN HOW COULD YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH?

286. LOOK, JERRI, I'M NOT GONNA ARGUE WITH YOU—

287. I'M NOT DRESSED FOR IT.

288. NOW I DON'T WANT YOU BACK IN MY CLASS...

289. UNTIL...

290. UNTIL WHAT?

291. I DON'T WANT YOU BACK IN MY CLASS.

292. I'M SAD.

293. GOOD LORD!

294. IS THIS WHERE THEY EAT?

295. TELL ME THIS IS SOME SORT OF HOLDING CELL FOR MISCREANTS.

296. BLANK, BECAUSE OF YOUR RECENT OUTBURST IN NOBLET'S CLASS,

297. I'D LIKE FOR YOU TO HAVE A LITTLE CHAT

298. WITH OUR STUDENT COUNSELOR, MS. PINES.

299. CASSIE, DO YOUR THING!

300.

301. SO, JERRI, I UNDERSTAND YOU HAVE A LITTLE PROBLEM.

302. IF BY LITTLE YOU MEAN MY DEAD DADDY, THEN YEAH,

303. I GUESS IT'S TINY.

304. YOU KNOW, THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE

305. ARE DEVOURED BY HIGH SCHOOL MASCOTS EVERY DAY.

306. IS THAT TRUE?

307. PROBABLY.

308. I DON'T KNOW.

309. NO.

310. OKAY, I'M GONNA SAY THIS QUICKLY

311. BECAUSE I'M STARTING TO FADE, HERE.

312. GRANTED, YOU MAY NEVER JUMP IN A SACK

313. WITH YOUR FATHER AGAIN.

314. BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN'T GET TO KNOW HIM.

315. GO HOME.

316. FIND OUT ABOUT HIM.

317. I ALREADY DID TRY TO FIND OUT ABOUT HIM.

318. I SUPPOSE THE KEY WORDS IN MY LAST STATEMENT WERE "GO HOME."

319. ARE YOU BORED?

320. GOD, I'M BORED.

321. I SHOULD HAVE BROUGHT A BOOK.

322. WELL, WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOUR DADDY DIED?

323. HEY!

324. YOU'D LOVE THAT, WOULDN'T YOU?

325. JUST BECAUSE YOUR DAD WAS KILLED IN SOME FREAK ACCIDENT

326. NOBODY CAN HAVE ONE?

327. I'LL TELL YA SOMETHIN':

328. MY DADDY'S ALIVE AND YOURS IS DEAD,

329. AND AIN'T NOTHIN' GONNA CHANGE THAT!

330. I BETTER GO CALL HIM.

331. DADDY... WHO ARE YOU?

332. WHERE'S MY TEAM, NOBLET?

333. WHERE'S MY TEAM?

334. IT'S ALMOST RACE TIME

335. AND MY BOYS ARE STARTING TO SWEAT.

336. WHERE ARE THEY, NOBLET!

337. I DON'T KNOW... DO YOU THINK MY DAD'S OKAY?

338. I DON'T CARE!

339. WELL, LOOK WHO DECIDED TO CUT IT CLOSE.

340. GET IN THE SACKS— WHERE'S YOUR FATHERS?

341. OUR FATHERS DIDN'T COME.

342. WE AND THE REST OF THE KIDS DECIDED NOT TO RACE.

343. WHAT?

344. NOBLET, TELL ME WHAT MY EARS ARE HEARING!

345. I DON'T KNOW.

346. PRINCIPAL BLACKMAN, IN LIGHT OF WHAT HAPPENED TO JERRI BLANK

347. WE FEEL IT WOULD BE INSENSITIVE TO BE IN THIS RACE.

348. DAMN THOSE DOGS!

349. HELLO, DEAD DADDY.

350. THERE'S SO MUCH LEFT UNKNOWN.

351. WHO WERE YOU?

352. DID YOU LOVE ME?

353. WHAT WAS GOING THROUGH YOUR HEAD

354. AS THOSE RABID DOGS GNAWED ON IT?

355. DID YOU SEE ME EATIN' THE HOT DOG?

356. MAYBE THE ANSWERS ARE HERE.

357. DADDY'S CLOSET.

358. OH MY GOD!

359. I NEVER KNEW HE GOLFED.

360. BUT SO WHAT.

361. WHO WERE YOU, AND DID YA LOVE ME?

362. I GUESS I'LL NEVER KNOW.

363. WHA— WHAT'S THIS?

364. "BLAH BLAH, JERRI... LOVE, DADDY."

365. A NEW SACK!

366. THAT'S WHO YOU WERE:

367. A FATHER WHO LOVED HIS LITTLE GIRL.

368. SO WHAT'S THE 411, ONYX?

369. ARE WE GONNA RUN THIS RACE OR ARE YOU PLANNING TO FORFEIT?

370. I'LL TAKE THAT GOLDEN SACK ANYWAY I CAN GET IT.

371. YOU KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF OF MY SACK!

372. YOU HAVE FIVE MINUTES, OR I'LL HAVE TO CALL A FORFEIT.

373. NOBLET!

374. HOP IN THIS SACK AND CALL ME DADDY!

375. I DON'T KNOW.

376. WE'RE DOOMED!

377. DAMN THOSE DOGS!

378. LOOK!

379. PRINCIPAL BLACKMAN, I'M BACK IN THE RACE!

380. DON'T BE SILLY, BLANK.

381. IT'S A FATHER/STUDENT RACE.

382. YOUR THE ONLY STUDENT AT FLATPOINT

383. WHO DOESN'T HAVE A FATHER!

384. OH YES I DO!

385. AND IT'S A FATHER WHO LOVES ME!

386. HEY, WHAT IS THIS!

387. THIS IS CRAP!

388. LET THE HOPPING BEGIN!

389. YES!

390. LET'S DO THIS, DADDY!

391. GO!

392. GO!

393. GET UP!

394. BIGGER STEPS!

395. GET UP!

396. GO!

397. YES!

398. YOU DID IT, JERRI!

399. YES!

400.

401. HOLD ON.

402. I'M AFRAID YOU'VE BEEN DISQUALIFIED.

403. BUT WHY?

404. WE CLEARLY WON!

405. ACCORDING TO SECTION THREE, PARAGRAPH 4 OF THE RULE BOOK,

406. 50% OF THE PARENT MUST CROSS THE FINISH LINE.

407. LOOKS LIKE YOU'VE LEFT ABOUT 75% OF DADDY ON THE TRACK.

408. THE TROPHY GOES TO MOUNT VALLEY!

409. AHHHHH!

410. WOOF WOOF WOOF!

411. STUPID!

412. THAT'S OKAY, BLANK.

413. YOU DID YOUR BEST.

414. YOU KNOW SOMETHING, CHIEF,

415. I MAY NOT HAVE WON THE TROPHY,

416. BUT I LEARNED SOMETHING A LOT MORE VALUABLE.

417. YOU NEVER REALLY LOSE YOUR PARENTS

418. UNLESS OF COURSE THEY DIE, AND THEN THEY'RE GONE FOREVER

419. AND NOTHING WILL BRING THEM BACK.

420. RIGHT, DADDY... ? SEE, NO RESPONSE.

421. THAT WAS A BOLD RAMBLE

422. TO COME FROM SUCH A LOSER, JERRI BLANK,

423. BOLD.

424.

425.