SpongeBob SquarePants 3x17

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Mr. Krabs has SpongeBob and Patrick paint the inside of his house, with a strict rule not to get paint on anything besides the wall because the paint is permanent. But they accidentally spill paint on Mr. Krabs' first dollar.

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1. Are you ready, kids?

2. Aye, aye, Captain!

3. I can't hear you.

4. Aye, aye, Captain!

5. Captioning sponsored by THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

6. and NICKELODEON

7. Ah...

8. I don't know how you do it, Gar Bear.

9. But that's the best cup of French toast I've ever had.

10. Well, time to punch that clock.

11. But not before checking

12. my motivational quote-a-day calendar.

13. "You are a winner."

14. And today's the first day of summer.

15. Happy first day of summer, Squidward.

16. Care to join me for solstice caroling?

17. I'm not much of a summer person, SpongeBob.

18. Davy Jones on the jib!

19. Do my ears deceive me?

20. Is it really the first day of summer?

21. Is it?

22. Yeah.

23. Oo-whee-hoo!

24. Gee, Mr. K, you sure have

25. a scorching case of summer fever.

26. What is it about summertime

27. that makes us so happy?

28. The firefly-lit nights?

29. The intoxicating aroma of a charcoal briquette?

30. The hypnotic sound of a lawn mower running over a flip-flop?

31. The money.

32. The money?

33. Er, uh, I mean, uh... the children.

34. Oh.

35. You see, boy, during the summer

36. the children are excused from their classes.

37. A recess commonly

38. referred to as summer break.

39. Tell me more about summer break.

40. Well, during the summer break

41. the children wander Bikini Bottom unsupervised

42. their pockets lined with allowance

43. free to spend their money

44. without any parental guidance whatsoever.

45. I guess that's what I like best.

46. Sure I suppose some would try

47. and take advantage of this situation

48. by selling them toys or candy.

49. But I sleep well at night with the knowledge

50. that I'm providing them with something they need—

51. a nutritious meal.

52. Come here, you little piggies!

53. I've been taught the true meaning of summer.

54. Almost closing time, Mr. K.

55. What?

56. But that's impossible!

57. What about the money?

58. I mean, uh... uh, what about the children?

59. I guess summer isn't coming this year.

60. Hey, maybe they're all at that new playground over there.

61. Playground?

62. Luring away me young customers?

63. Warm up the boat, SpongeBob.

64. See anything, Mr. Krabs?

65. Oh, they're here all right.

66. Just look at them, SpongeBob.

67. So weak and malnourished

68. with nobody trying to sell them nothing.

69. Breaks me heart.

70. No!

71. I got nothing to live for, SpongeBob.

72. The way you drove the boat

73. belying on the ground was kind of cool.

74. True.

75. But that's not going to get these munchkins

76. away from this playground.

77. Unless...

78. Hmm.

79. See you tomorrow, boy.

80. Got a lot of work to do.

81. You got it, Mr. Krabs.

82. Hey!

83. Another day, another dollar.

84. Gee, I wonder what Mr. Krabs has been up to since I saw him last

85. and then went home to do nothing of particular interest

86. till this very moment.

87. Huh?

88. SpongeBob.

89. You're just in time for the grand unveiling of...

90. Krabby Land.

91. Krabby Land, sir?

92. Yes, Krabby Land.

93. Where a kid can have fun.

94. For the right price.

95. Welcome to the Krusty Krab, young man.

96. What's your name?

97. Monroe.

98. Nice to meet you, Monroe.

99. Whee!

100. Aha.

101. Okay, Money...

102. I mean, uh, children.

103. It's time for the grand unveiling of Money!

104. I mean, Krabby Land!

105. Yay!

106. Okay, kids, now promise Uncle Krabs

107. that if you get hungry while you're playing

108. you'll come inside for some delicious

109. nutritious Krabby Patties.

110. We promise.

111. All right, here we go.

112. I give you... Krabby Land!

113. Yay!

114. Whoa! Ooh!

115. Where am I?

116. Uh... that reminds me.

117. I forgot to give you these coloring books

118. slash liability waivers.

119. Everyone who hands theirs back

120. gets to meet the one and only Krabby the Clown.

121. Yay! Yay!

122. Have fun. And don't forget to eat plenty

123. of vitamin-enriched Krabby Patties—

124. Krabby the Clown's favorite meal.

125. We want Krabby! We want Krabby!

126. Where is Krabby, Mr. Krabs?

127. He'll be here after I count their money.

128. Just stall them.

129. Stall them? How do I do that?

130. I don't know, be entertaining.

131. Duh-uh... duh.

132. Hey, kids.

133. You're not Krabby the Clown.

134. No, I'm not. I'm, uh...

135. I'm Krabby's beloved sidekick

136. the Krabby Patty... Burglar.

137. Lame.

138. Krabby will be here soon.

139. He, uh, had to take the bus.

140. But in the meantime, let's have some fun!

141. You kids like bubbles?

142. No.

143. Well, you've never seen my bubbles.

144. Voila!

145. A bubble shaped like a jellyfish.

146. How about that?

147. Still lame.

148. Okay.

149. Prepare to be blown back on your tail fins.

150. Ta-dah!

151. Uh. Uh.

152. You stink!

153. Bring on the clown!

154. Okay.

155. Now for a finale.

156. Boo! Boo! Boo!

157. Boo!

158. Boo!

159. Boo!

160. Boo!

161. My eyes!

162. Whoa-oh-oh!

163. They seem to respond to me being in pain.

164. They enjoy other people's misery.

165. Hey, kids. Check this out.

166. I've got them right where I want them.

167. Aah!

168. Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

169. Ooh! Yow! Ow! Ooh! Yow!

170. Mr. Krabs

171. I can't take much more of this stalling stuff.

172. Always thinking about yourself.

173. Get out there and stall!

174. What happened to your arms and legs, boy?

175. The kids are using them as boomerangs.

176. Boomerangs?

177. Oh, no! They might break my windows.

178. What are we going to do?

179. Well, now that all their money's counted

180. tell them Krabby has just arrived.

181. Really? He's here?

182. Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy...

183. Get out there and tell them!

184. Listen, everybody.

185. Krabby the Clown is in the building!

186. Who do you want?

187. Krabby!

188. When do you want him?

189. Now!

190. Krabby! Krabby!

191. Krabby! Krabby! Hooray!

192. Hey, kids.

193. Are you ready to meet Krabby the Clown?

194. Yay!

195. All right. Here you go!

196. Hey, kids.

197. Uh, thank you all for coming.

198. Thank you.

199. Eat plenty of Krabby Patties.

200. Ah, Krabs, you'd done it again.

201. I'll say you have.

202. SpongeBob?

203. How could you, Mr. Krabs?

204. You promised these children Krabby the Clown.

205. But all I saw up there was...

206. Cheapy the Cheapskate.

207. Hey, I ain't cheap.

208. Now take this tomato back to the kitchen before it spoils.

209. But what about the true meaning of summer?

210. What about the children?

211. The children?

212. I don't care about the children.

213. I just care about their parents' money.

214. Ah, the fact that their feeble minds are easily manipulated

215. by cheap playgrounds and talentless clowns

216. is no skin off my nose.

217. Survival of the fittest, SpongeBob.

218. Survival of the fittest. Heh-heh.

219. Oh. Hey, kids.

220. Uh... Uncle Krabs has to go to the bank now.

221. Get him!

222. I suppose I'll never know the true meaning of summer.

223. I thought I knew it once

224. but that was a long, long time ago.

225. You mean this morning?

226. Yeah.

227. Come outside, Mr. Squarepants.

228. It's a summer miracle.

229. Hoorah!

230. Wow, thousands of dollars fluttering in the breeze.

231. I guess that's the true meaning of summer.

232. Where's Mr. Krabs?

233. He's missing out on all the summer fun.

234. Let me go!

235. I got to get some of that green stuff.

236. No!

237. Not that green stuff!

238. No!

239. Ah, finally, the weekend is here

240. and this isn't just any old weekend.

241. This is the weekend SpongeBob and Patrick go camping.

242. Wouldn't it be great if they got lost in the woods

243. and never came back?

244. Patrick, I'm scared.

245. Ho-ho, that would be great.

246. You've waited a long time for this.

247. A soft bed...

248. Warm tea...

249. A good book...

250. And two whole days with no.

251. What the...?

252. SpongeBob— aren't you two

253. supposed to be camping?

254. We arecamping.

255. SpongeBob, it's not camping

256. if you're ten feet from your house.

257. It doesn't matter where you are

258. as long as you're outdoors.

259. While all those soft city folk are safe in their beds

260. reading books, we're out here pitting ourselves

261. against the formidable forces of nature.

262. You want to join us?

263. No.

264. Okay. Have fun inside.

265. What do you mean, have fun inside?

266. Just... have fun inside.

267. See you tomorrow.

268. Oh. Bye.

269. You little sneak.

270. I see what you're doing. What?

271. Don't think I can't see what you're doing.

272. What?

273. You're saying I can't take it.

274. But all I...

275. You're saying I'm soft.

276. You think your little "have fun inside" challenge

277. is going to make me come camping with you

278. but that is never going to happen.

279. There's no way I'm going to sit out here all night

280. with you two losers.

281. So get used to it.

282. Okay.

283. Have fun inside.

284. That's it! I'm in!

285. I'll show you camping.

286. Squidward's going to come camping with us.

287. Now you'll see how a real...

288. outdoorsman does it.

289. Here we are— my remote-controlled

290. self-assembling tent.

291. Watch and learn.

292. That was great, Squidward

293. but how do you get inside?

294. Yeah, it's all crushy-looking.

295. It isn't put up yet, you idiots.

296. Customization.

297. Genius.

298. He's tenderizing the ground.

299. Of course.

300. Write that down, write that down!

301. Huh?

302. Voila.

303. But what could compare to just lying out under the stars?

304. Well, I worked up an appetite

305. as big as all outdoors.

306. Time for a little grub.

307. I suppose you two are going to stew up

308. some twigs and rocks, right?

309. No, we got something even better—

310. Marshmallows.

311. Mmm-mm.

312. Just like the astronauts eat.

313. Patrick to SpongeBob. Patrick to SpongeBob.

314. Do you read me? Over.

315. SpongeBob to Patrick.

316. I read you. Over.

317. Patrick to SpongeBob.

318. I like going

319. Over.

320. SpongeBob to Patrick.

321. Me, too.

322. SpongeBob to Patrick, help yourself. Over.

323. Yummy.

324. Patrick to SpongeBob.

325. The deliciousness has landed.

326. Well, you two astronauts can eat marshmallows.

327. I'm going to have a can

328. of Swedish barnacle balls... just as soon

329. as I can get my can opener.

330. But, Squidward

331. didn't you take a can opener

332. when you hiked out here?

333. Why would I bother?

334. We're ten feet from my house.

335. But this is the wilderness.

336. It just doesn't seem to fit the camping spirit.

337. Pretty weenie.

338. All right, all right.

339. Give me a marshmallow.

340. Ha-ha-ha.

341. Ha-ha-ha.

342. Okay, besides spitting molten foodstuffs at me

343. what else do you do for fun?

344. Well... after a long day of camping

345. it's nice to unwind with a nice, relaxing campfire song.

346. I call this one "The Campfire Song Song."

347. Squidward.

348. Good.

349. Now, wasn't that relaxing?

350. No.

351. Thisis relaxing.

352. Oh, no!

353. I'll save you, Squidward.

354. Squidward, are you all right?

355. That's it.

356. Chew... chew... and swallow.

357. There. Better?

358. Better?

359. I was just fine until you launched

360. that ballistic junk food into my windpipe!

361. But I had to. It's too dangerous

362. to play the clarinet badly out here in the wilderness.

363. It might attract...

364. a sea bear.

365. A sea bear?

366. You mean like the ones that... don't exist?

367. What are you saying?

368. There's no such thing.

369. They're just a myth.

370. Oh, no, Squidward.

371. Sea bears are all too real.

372. It says so in the Bikini Bottom Inquirer.

373. "I married a Sea Bear"?

374. Yeah, and Fake Science Monthly.

375. "Sea Bears and Fairytales Are Real"?

376. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

377. Well, maybe it isstupid

378. but it's also dumb.

379. Patrick's right, Squidward—

380. Sea Bears are no laughing matter.

381. Why, once I met this guy who knew this guy

382. who knew this guy who knew this guy

383. who knew this guy who knew this guy

384. who knew this guy

385. who knew this guy who knew this guy

386. who knew this guy who knew this guy

387. who knew this guy who knew this guy

388. who knew this guy who knew this guy

389. who knew this guy's cousin...

390. You're right!

391. I should be more careful.

392. In fact, why don't you tell me

393. all of the things I shouldn't do

394. if I want to keep the sea bears away.

395. Okay, that's easy.

396. First off, don't play the clarinet.

397. Okay, then what?

398. Never wave your flashlight back and forth really fast.

399. Flashlights are their natural prey.

400. You're kidding.

401. Don't stomp around— they take that

402. as a challenge. Yeah.

403. Go on.

404. Don't ever eat cheese.

405. Sliced or cubed?

406. Cubed. Sliced is fine.

407. Yeah, yeah. And?

408. Never wear a sombrero... in a goofy fashion.

409. Or clown shoes. Or a hoop skirt.

410. And never... Ever...

411. Ever! Duh!

412. Screech like a chimpanzee!

413. Wow. It's amazing

414. how many things can set a sea bear off.

415. They're horrible.

416. And... and suddenly, I have the sense

417. we're all in danger.

418. Why? Why?

419. I don't know...

420. Just a feeling!

421. No.

422. Yes.

423. No.

424. Squidward, please don't.

425. SpongeBob, what are we going to do?

426. A sea bear is sure to come and eat us.

427. Don't worry, Patrick.

428. I'll draw us an anti-sea bear circle in the dirt.

429. Good thinking.

430. All the experts say

431. it's the only defense against a sea bear attack.

432. Ha-ha-ha-ha. You guys are so gullible.

433. See? I did everything that attracts a sea bear

434. and nothing happened.

435. If sea bears really exist, why didn't one show up?

436. Maybe it's because you're not wearing

437. your sombrero in a goofy fashion.

438. Oh, pfft. Sorry.

439. How silly of me.

440. You mean like this?

441. No. Like that.

442. Squidward, are you okay?

443. No.

444. Quick. Jump inside our anti-sea bear circle

445. before he comes back.

446. Yeah. Sea bears often attack more than once.

447. Are you crazy?

448. A dirt circle won't stop that monster.

449. I'm running for my life.

450. No!

451. Don't run! Sea bears hate that.

452. Thanks for the tip.

453. I guess I'll just limp home, then.

454. No!

455. They hate limping more than running!

456. Well, I guess I'll just have...

457. I should have warned you about crawling.

458. What did I do that time?

459. I don't know. I guess he just doesn't like you.

460. Pretend to be somebody else.

461. Here, draw a circle.

462. Okay.

463. That was an oval!

464. It has to be a circle!

465. Move over!

466. Hey. It worked.

467. You guys saved my life.

468. Yeah. I'm glad it was just a sea bear.

469. This circle would never hold back a sea rhinoceros.

470. What attracts them?

471. The sound of a sea bear attack.

472. Huh. Good thing we're all wearing

473. our anti-sea rhinoceros undergarments.

474. Right, Squidward?

475. Uh-huh.

476. Captioning sponsored by THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

477. and NICKELODEON