1. Are you ready, kids?Copy !req
2. Aye, aye, captain!Copy !req
3. I can't hear you.Copy !req
4. Aye, aye, captain!Copy !req
5. and NICKELODEON]Copy !req
6. Order up, Squidward!Copy !req
7. Hey, hey, Squidward,
did you see me?Copy !req
8. Okay, see you later,
Squidinater.Copy !req
9. Good morning,
Mr. Squidward.Copy !req
10. So, are you ready?Copy !req
11. To go home?Copy !req
12. No, to exchange
giftsCopy !req
13. for Employee
Brotherhood Day.Copy !req
14. Mr. Krabs, you pay meCopy !req
15. to stand behind
this registerCopy !req
16. and take orders
and give changeCopy !req
17. but you could never
pay me enoughCopy !req
18. to act brotherly toward...Copy !req
19. that guy!Copy !req
20. Hmm.Copy !req
21. That attitude of yoursCopy !req
22. is precisely why
we're having this
little shenanigan.Copy !req
23. Now, pay attention!Copy !req
24. The lad's got
a surprise for you.Copy !req
25. Squidward, in honor
of employee brotherhoodCopy !req
26. I present to you a gift...Copy !req
27. Ta-dah!Copy !req
28. "I heart you."Copy !req
29. Try it on,
Mr. Squidward!Copy !req
30. It's got you
written all over it.Copy !req
31. I wasn't sure how bigCopy !req
32. to make the hole
for the headCopy !req
33. so I used a watermelon
for size.Copy !req
34. Do you love it?Copy !req
35. It's a little itchy.Copy !req
36. What's this thing made of?Copy !req
37. Eyelashes!Copy !req
38. Now, may I resume
my minimum-wage duties?Copy !req
39. After you present
yourbrotherhood gift.Copy !req
40. I'll buy the little twerp
a gumball.Copy !req
41. Oh, no, no, no, lad;
you know the rules—Copy !req
42. you have to make
the gift.Copy !req
43. The only thing I'm making
is for the exit.Copy !req
44. Is this any better,
Squidward?Copy !req
45. I made this one with my tears.Copy !req
46. I knew you'd come around, boy.Copy !req
47. Make something nice.Copy !req
48. Why can't I just buy something
for the little weirdo?Copy !req
49. Heave ho!Copy !req
50. If you drop one single
slice of me bootyCopy !req
51. I'll have... your booty!Copy !req
52. Hi, there.Copy !req
53. Those homemade pies
sure look good.Copy !req
54. Oh, these aren't homemade.Copy !req
55. They were made in a factory...Copy !req
56. a bomb factory.Copy !req
57. They're bombs.Copy !req
58. Oh, well, that's too bad.Copy !req
59. I thought they were pies
and I wanted to buy one.Copy !req
60. Wait!Copy !req
61. We were just kiddingCopy !req
62. about all that
bomb stuff.Copy !req
63. That'll be
25 bucks, please.Copy !req
64. So, what flavor is it?Copy !req
65. Cherry.
Apple.
Raspberry.Copy !req
66. Well, if it gets
old man Krabs
off my back.Copy !req
67. Okay, here it is,
Mr. KrabsCopy !req
68. fresh from the oven.Copy !req
69. I'll be returning
to my life now.Copy !req
70. Not yet!Copy !req
71. I got to make sure
you did it right.Copy !req
72. Wait a second...Copy !req
73. this would got great
with some milk.Copy !req
74. Oop.Copy !req
75. So, you tried to kill meCopy !req
76. over a little new-age
management, eh?Copy !req
77. But Mr. Krabs,
I had no idea.Copy !req
78. I can explain.Copy !req
79. Mr. Krabs, are you okay?Copy !req
80. I heard a... wow!Copy !req
81. A pie!Copy !req
82. It's from Squidward.Copy !req
83. "To SpongeBob...Copy !req
84. Well, here you go."Copy !req
85. And that's what happened.Copy !req
86. 25 dollars?Copy !req
87. A bomb?Copy !req
88. In the Krusty Krab?Copy !req
89. That's where
you left it.Copy !req
90. It's not there.Copy !req
91. Hey, guys.Copy !req
92. Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm.Copy !req
93. Thanks for the pie, Squidward.Copy !req
94. You had to kill him.Copy !req
95. The boy cries you
a sweater of tearsCopy !req
96. and you kill him.Copy !req
97. How are you going
to live with yourself?Copy !req
98. Kill him?Copy !req
99. Here's your order, sir.Copy !req
100. Thanks.Copy !req
101. No, no, what we got...Copy !req
102. we got to call the hospital.Copy !req
103. Won't do any good—
I've seen this before.Copy !req
104. When that pie
goes up to bat—Copy !req
105. I mean, hits his
lower intestine—Copy !req
106. boom!Copy !req
107. You've seen this before?Copy !req
108. 11 times, as
a matter of fact.Copy !req
109. Yes, hello,
doctor? Hospital?Copy !req
110. It won't do any good?Copy !req
111. Eleven times?Copy !req
112. Oh!Copy !req
113. Oh, he's a goner.Copy !req
114. How do we tell him?Copy !req
115. Don't tell him—Copy !req
116. that'll only make him
feel worse.Copy !req
117. The way I see it,
he's only got till sunset.Copy !req
118. Why ruin his
last day on Earth?Copy !req
119. The lad deserves
to enjoy his final hours.Copy !req
120. You're right, Mr. Krabs!Copy !req
121. I'm going to make
SpongeBob's final hoursCopy !req
122. the best he's ever had.Copy !req
123. And this time,
there's going to be love—Copy !req
124. so much he's going
to drown in it!Copy !req
125. Drown in it!Copy !req
126. "Note to self:
Watch out for Squidward."Copy !req
127. Uh, SpongeBob?Copy !req
128. I forgot to tell youCopy !req
129. there's a part two
to your gift.Copy !req
130. "Part two"?Copy !req
131. Part two, part two,
part two...Copy !req
132. Uh, please
don't do that.Copy !req
133. What's for part two?Copy !req
134. Well, what's the most fun thing
you can think of?Copy !req
135. Actually,
I keep a listCopy !req
136. of the most fun things
I like to do.Copy !req
137. I call it my
"friendship list."Copy !req
138. Great...Copy !req
139. Uh, let me see it.Copy !req
140. The things
that are extra funCopy !req
141. I've written in red.Copy !req
142. Everything's in red.Copy !req
143. Yeah, I know.Copy !req
144. We'd better start nowCopy !req
145. if want to get
through this listCopy !req
146. before you die...
of anticipation.Copy !req
147. Then let's roll!Copy !req
148. Bye, Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
149. Heads up, Squidward—Copy !req
150. looks like they're
going to replace you.Copy !req
151. Yeah.Copy !req
152. Uh, now let's have
a look at that list.Copy !req
153. Well, the first thing
I want to doCopy !req
154. is show my best friend,
SquidwardCopy !req
155. to everybody in town.Copy !req
156. Hi there, this is
my best friend, Squidward.Copy !req
157. Hey, kids, check it out:Copy !req
158. This is my best friend,
Squidward.Copy !req
159. Hi, I want to show you
my best friend, Squidward.Copy !req
160. Hey, Frank.Copy !req
161. Glad that's over.Copy !req
162. Good, 'cause we're on
to our next activity.Copy !req
163. Which is...?Copy !req
164. I'm going to showCopy !req
165. my best friend,
SquidwardCopy !req
166. to everyone in town
wearing a salmon suit.Copy !req
167. You're going to be
wearing a salmon suit?Copy !req
168. That's a good one,
Squidward!Copy !req
169. Next!Copy !req
170. Knock-knock jokes.Copy !req
171. Hey, Squid, knock-knock.Copy !req
172. Who's there?Copy !req
173. I am!Copy !req
174. Oh, yeah...Copy !req
175. Look out, everyone,
friends in reverse!Copy !req
176. Oo...Copy !req
177. Turn left, and... stop.Copy !req
178. See, that's what
it would be likeCopy !req
179. if you had me
for a face.Copy !req
180. I can't breathe.Copy !req
181. Are you sure
you should beCopy !req
182. poking it like that?Copy !req
183. Who's the doctor here?Copy !req
184. The last thing
on the list is...Copy !req
185. Does it involve
more dismemberment?Copy !req
186. "Watch the sunset
with Squidward"Copy !req
187. "Sunset"?Copy !req
188. The way I see it,
the lad's got
until sunsetCopy !req
189. before that bomb hits
his lower intestine.Copy !req
190. Hey, it's Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
191. Hi, Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
192. Okay, see you later.Copy !req
193. Come on, buddy—Copy !req
194. You want a sunset,
you'll get a sunset.Copy !req
195. Ah... underwater sunsetsCopy !req
196. sure are beautiful
eh, Squidward?Copy !req
197. Yeah.Copy !req
198. Yeah, this is greatCopy !req
199. just the three of us—
you, meCopy !req
200. and this brick wall
you built between us.Copy !req
201. Yeah...Copy !req
202. Sunsets remind me
of bowls of fruit.Copy !req
203. What do they make you think of,
Squidward?Copy !req
204. Explosions.Copy !req
205. I mean, erosion.Copy !req
206. You know, if I
were to die right nowCopy !req
207. in some sort of fiery explosionCopy !req
208. due to the carelessness
of a friendCopy !req
209. well, that would just be okay.Copy !req
210. Wow, if feels like somethingCopy !req
211. just dropped
into my lower intestine.Copy !req
212. Hey, smells like cherry.Copy !req
213. Or maybe grape.Copy !req
214. Blueberry?Copy !req
215. Here it is, the sunset!Copy !req
216. I always love
to count it down.Copy !req
217. Five!Copy !req
218. You do the rest, buddy!Copy !req
219. Uh, four...Copy !req
220. three...Copy !req
221. t-two...Copy !req
222. One!Copy !req
223. I guess we started too early.Copy !req
224. Let's start again.Copy !req
225. Five, four, three...Copy !req
226. Two...Copy !req
227. One...Copy !req
228. Well, at least I was ableCopy !req
229. to make his last few hours
meaningful.Copy !req
230. I am such a good person.Copy !req
231. Hey, Squidward,
check this out.Copy !req
232. Squidward, we already played
"babble like an idiot."Copy !req
233. Why are you still here?Copy !req
234. Since we finished everything on
the list, I made a new one.Copy !req
235. I already filled up
this book with ideas.Copy !req
236. We should be able
to finish by January.Copy !req
237. Forget the book!Copy !req
238. I spent the whole day with youCopy !req
239. doing all kinds
of ridiculous thingsCopy !req
240. because you
were supposed to explode!Copy !req
241. You want me to explode?Copy !req
242. Yes! that's what
I've been waiting for!Copy !req
243. Um... okay, I'll try.Copy !req
244. Gary! You are going
to finish your dessertCopy !req
245. and you are going to like it!Copy !req
246. Now, it's your turn.Copy !req
247. That's not what I meant,
you barnacle head!Copy !req
248. Oo, good one.Copy !req
249. No, you're supposed
to explodeCopy !req
250. into a million pieces.Copy !req
251. Why would I do that?Copy !req
252. Because the pie you ate
was a bomb!Copy !req
253. What pie?Copy !req
254. The one I leftCopy !req
255. on the counter todayCopy !req
256. that I bought
from piratesCopy !req
257. for 25 bucks, and I
didn't know was a bombCopy !req
258. and you ate it,
that pie!Copy !req
259. Pie?Copy !req
260. Oh, you mean this pie.Copy !req
261. I was saving it
in my pocketCopy !req
262. for us to share.Copy !req
263. Let's eat.Copy !req
264. Oops.Copy !req
265. Ouch...Copy !req
266. Ah, the Krusty KrabCopy !req
267. home of the Krabby Patty,
with its top secret formulaCopy !req
268. known only to those brave
enough and intelligent enoughCopy !req
269. to comprehend
its culinary complexity.Copy !req
270. Look, Mr. Krabs, I'm doing it,
I'm doing it!Copy !req
271. Quit fooling around, SpongeBob,
we've got customers.Copy !req
272. But wherever there is
a secret recipeCopy !req
273. there is someone
who wants to steal it.Copy !req
274. Ouch!Copy !req
275. And now for the final touch.Copy !req
276. Perfect!Copy !req
277. With this disguiseCopy !req
278. that formula is as good as mine.Copy !req
279. Are you SpongeBob
SquarePants?Copy !req
280. Why, yes—Copy !req
281. yes, I am.Copy !req
282. Then you've just won $1 million.Copy !req
283. You just have to answer
one question.Copy !req
284. What is the Krabby Patty
secret formula?Copy !req
285. Yes.Copy !req
286. Yes!Copy !req
287. Yes!Copy !req
288. The formula is
the sole propertyCopy !req
289. of the Krusty KrabCopy !req
290. and is only
to be discussed
with its creator.Copy !req
291. Duplication
is punishable
by law.Copy !req
292. Restrictions apply,
results may vary.Copy !req
293. That's it!Copy !req
294. You better cough up
that secret formula or else!Copy !req
295. Plankton!Copy !req
296. Krabs!Copy !req
297. Plankton!Copy !req
298. Krabs!Copy !req
299. SpongeBob.Copy !req
300. You can't do this to me, Krabs.Copy !req
301. I went to college!Copy !req
302. Ouch!Copy !req
303. That Plankton is
a clever beast.Copy !req
304. You've got to keep
a sharp eye out for
him, SpongeBob.Copy !req
305. The Krabby Patty law
must be enforced.Copy !req
306. The future of the Krusty Krab
depends on it.Copy !req
307. Don't worry, Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
308. As long as these pants
are squareCopy !req
309. and this sponge is Bob...Copy !req
310. I will not let you down!Copy !req
311. Uh, SpongeBob...Copy !req
312. could you let me down?Copy !req
313. Man, these patties
sure are delicious.Copy !req
314. I wonder what's in
that secret formula?Copy !req
315. Code 12, code 12.Copy !req
316. Your disguises can't fool me
this time, Plankton.Copy !req
317. Everyone at the Head
Enhancement ClinicCopy !req
318. said nobody would notice.Copy !req
319. SpongeBob!Copy !req
320. You're scaring away me money.Copy !req
321. Sorry, Mr. Krabs,
I'm just tryingCopy !req
322. to protect
the secret formula.Copy !req
323. That's no reason
to rip people's
heads off, boy.Copy !req
324. Just remember the most
important rule.Copy !req
325. No free napkins.Copy !req
326. No! The other
most important rule—Copy !req
327. regarding the secret formula.Copy !req
328. Only discuss the secret recipe
with Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
329. As long as you do that,
the secret is safe.Copy !req
330. I always thought
the most important rule wasCopy !req
331. "Why do today what you
can put off till tomorrow?"Copy !req
332. What is today but
yesterday's tomorrow?Copy !req
333. Huh?Copy !req
334. Today, I want you
to take inventoryCopy !req
335. on everything in here;Copy !req
336. every last pickle
and patty must be
accounted for.Copy !req
337. Aye, aye, captain.Copy !req
338. Two boxes of buns.Copy !req
339. Three pounds of patties.Copy !req
340. Mr. Squidward.Copy !req
341. What now, Mr. Krabs?Copy !req
342. That's right, I am Krabs...Copy !req
343. your boss, your rulerCopy !req
344. your master.Copy !req
345. Ha, ha, ha.Copy !req
346. You're not
Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
347. Hey, why don't
you take the rest
of the day off?Copy !req
348. Well...Copy !req
349. whatever you say,
"Mr. Krabs."Copy !req
350. Whoopee!Copy !req
351. Hi, Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
352. Oh, sweet domination.Copy !req
353. This is it!Copy !req
354. No sign of Plankton yet.Copy !req
355. Gosh, Mr. Krabs, you
don't look so good.Copy !req
356. Ooh, you're so cold.Copy !req
357. That's just
my metal suit.Copy !req
358. I made it to protect
the formula.Copy !req
359. SpongeBob.Copy !req
360. SpongeBob!Copy !req
361. It's that thick-headed Krabs.Copy !req
362. He'll ruin everything.Copy !req
363. Look, a jellyfish.Copy !req
364. I got it, I got it.Copy !req
365. I got it, I got it.Copy !req
366. SpongeBob!Copy !req
367. Hey, Mr. Krabs,
what happenedCopy !req
368. to your
metal pants?Copy !req
369. Don't go all loopy
on me, boy.Copy !req
370. I need your help.Copy !req
371. And where in the high seas
is Squidward?Copy !req
372. You gave him
the day off.Copy !req
373. Day...Copy !req
374. I don't know the meaning
of them horrible words!Copy !req
375. Now quit your laying
around, SpongeBobCopy !req
376. and take out
that garbage.Copy !req
377. It's starting
to give me a rash.Copy !req
378. Yes, sir, Mr. Krabs, sir.Copy !req
379. Hey, Mr. Krabs, just
taking out that garbage.Copy !req
380. Never mind that— I
need to talk to you.Copy !req
381. Whoa-ho, Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
382. I didn't know
you had heat vision.Copy !req
383. Never mind, I need
you to tell me...Copy !req
384. SpongeBob!Copy !req
385. Yike!Copy !req
386. SpongeBob! I'm
not paying youCopy !req
387. to stand around.Copy !req
388. Get back to the kitchen.Copy !req
389. But you wanted
to ask a question.Copy !req
390. Yes... why aren't
you working harder?Copy !req
391. I don't know, Mr. Krabs...Copy !req
392. I don't know.Copy !req
393. I'll never get that formulaCopy !req
394. with that pest, Krabs,
popping in and out like that.Copy !req
395. I've got it!Copy !req
396. I been saving this
for a rainy day.Copy !req
397. It looks like
an ordinary penny...Copy !req
398. because it isan ordinary penny.Copy !req
399. That fool Krabs is too greedy
to ignore you, my little pretty.Copy !req
400. That sound, it sounds like...Copy !req
401. the pitter-patter of...Copy !req
402. money!Copy !req
403. Hey, where you going, beautiful?Copy !req
404. Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
405. Wha...Copy !req
406. Stop!Copy !req
407. Please!Copy !req
408. Wait!Copy !req
409. Nothing stands between me
and that secret formula now.Copy !req
410. Ouch!Copy !req
411. Hey, Mr. Krabs, just doing
a little scrubbing.Copy !req
412. Hello, SpongeBob,
it is me, Mr. Krabs...Copy !req
413. in the fleshCopy !req
414. standing right
in front of youCopy !req
415. with no one else around.Copy !req
416. I can see that, Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
417. I thought we might
discuss the Krabby Patty
secret formula.Copy !req
418. Isn't that
a microphone?Copy !req
419. What?Copy !req
420. Why, yes, it is.Copy !req
421. I must get this
shirt cleaned.Copy !req
422. All right, now tell me
the secret formula.Copy !req
423. But, sir, we haven't done
the secret handshake yet.Copy !req
424. Oh, yes, here,
let's shake.Copy !req
425. We don't shake
with our hands,
remember?Copy !req
426. Uh, right, why don't you start.Copy !req
427. We stand on one foot...Copy !req
428. balance a glass
of chocolate milk
on our headsCopy !req
429. and sing the Bikini Bottom
national anthem.Copy !req
430. ♪ Oh, Bikini BottomCopy !req
431. Formula time?Copy !req
432. Almost.Copy !req
433. Yum, yum, this spaghetti
sure is good.Copy !req
434. Belch.Copy !req
435. Meatball, meatball,
spaghetti underneathCopy !req
436. ravioli, ravioli,
Great Barrier Reef.Copy !req
437. Okay, now let's hear
that formula.Copy !req
438. Sorry, no can do,
Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
439. Wha-a-a-a-t?Copy !req
440. But we did everything you said.Copy !req
441. I followed all the rules.Copy !req
442. I even ate 105 black licorice
jelly beans through a straw.Copy !req
443. Now, why can't you tell me
the formula?Copy !req
444. It's your rule—Copy !req
445. never speak the formula.Copy !req
446. You told me to keep it in...Copy !req
447. this bottle.Copy !req
448. This is it, Plankton.Copy !req
449. Gently, now.Copy !req
450. Gasp!Copy !req
451. How could you, SpongeBob?Copy !req
452. Giving me secret formula
to this... impostor?Copy !req
453. Don't listen
to him, SpongeBob.Copy !req
454. Remember— ravioli,
ravioli, give me
the formuoli.Copy !req
455. SpongeBob, no,
don't listen to him.Copy !req
456. I'm the realMr. Krabs.Copy !req
457. Don't listen
to him, he's
obviously a robot.Copy !req
458. Well, if I was a robot,
which I'm notCopy !req
459. at least, I'm
well put togetherCopy !req
460. not some rusted-out,
steam-driven
pile of junk.Copy !req
461. Who you calling
"steam-driven?"Copy !req
462. QUIET!Copy !req
463. Until I know who the real
Mr. Krabs is, nobody movesCopy !req
464. nobody gets hurt.Copy !req
465. Tartar sauce?Copy !req
466. Take it easy
with that thing.Copy !req
467. I'll do the talking
around here.Copy !req
468. I think I'll just ask you two
a couple of questions;Copy !req
469. questions only the real
Mr. Krabs could answer.Copy !req
470. Okay, then.Copy !req
471. First question:
what time does
the Krusty Krab open?Copy !req
472. 9:30 AM.Copy !req
473. Right.Copy !req
474. That's one strike,
"Mr. Fake."Copy !req
475. But...Copy !req
476. Uh, uh, I'm running
this quiz showCopy !req
477. I'll ask
the questions.Copy !req
478. If there's going
to be any "buts"Copy !req
479. there going
to be from me.Copy !req
480. Okay, question number two:Copy !req
481. How much does
a Krabby Patty cost?Copy !req
482. $2.99.Copy !req
483. On Wednesday.Copy !req
484. 99 cents.Copy !req
485. Right again.Copy !req
486. You're starting
to look pretty phonyCopy !req
487. right about now.Copy !req
488. I'd be nervous
if I were you.Copy !req
489. Now, only the really real
Mr. Krabs could answer this—Copy !req
490. if we're discussing
the secret formulaCopy !req
491. on the third Wednesday
in JanuaryCopy !req
492. and it's not
raining outsideCopy !req
493. after we gargle
with pudding,
what do we do?Copy !req
494. That's an easy one.Copy !req
495. You just... just...
let's see, if it's a...Copy !req
496. if it's January with...Copy !req
497. with vanilla pudding,
you... uh...Copy !req
498. pass.Copy !req
499. Wait!Copy !req
500. SpongeBob!Copy !req
501. Give me another chance.Copy !req
502. So long,
imitation Krabs.Copy !req
503. Bye-bye.Copy !req
504. I knew it was you
all along, Mr. Krabs.Copy !req
505. Here you go.Copy !req
506. Thank you,
Sponge-Dupe.Copy !req
507. Whoop.Copy !req
508. Don't forget
your lucky penny.Copy !req
509. Yoicks.Copy !req
510. This must be
your lucky day.Copy !req
511. The self-destruct coin slot
has been activated.Copy !req
512. Ten seconds till detonation.Copy !req
513. "Coin-operated self-destruct?"Copy !req
514. Not one of my better ideas.Copy !req
515. Help!Copy !req
516. Ouch.Copy !req
517. If that was
Plankton...Copy !req
518. uh-oh.Copy !req
519. Help...Copy !req
520. Yah, Mr. Krabs!Copy !req
521. Ooh, yum, yum.Copy !req
522. Back, you hungry
hand, back.Copy !req
523. Help!Copy !req
524. Gee, Mr. Krabs,
I'm sorry.Copy !req
525. I thought you
were a phony.Copy !req
526. Hoo, that's okay,
me lad.Copy !req
527. Long as the secret
formula's safe again.Copy !req
528. However, that penny's
coming out of
your paycheck.Copy !req
529. Really?Copy !req
530. [Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATIONCopy !req
531. and NICKELODEON]Copy !req