1. Why? I don't understand.
Is it something I've done?
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2. It's just not going to work. OK?
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3. It's five years! Five years!
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4. I was drunk.
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5. We had fun. We had good times.
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6. To be honest,
I don't remember much.
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7. I don't under... Give me a reason.
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8. You think I'm unemotional.
I can be emotional.
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9. I cried at the end of Terminator 2.
With the thumb and the molten...
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10. Is there someone else?
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11. Sort of.
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12. What?
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13. My boyfriend.
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14. That bastard! I bloody knew it.
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15. I'm sorry. I really am.
It was just a bit of fun.
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16. Just doesn't feel right. OK?
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17. Fine.
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18. All right?
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19. Here's a bit of change.
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20. Sarah, please don't do this.
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21. Leave your stuff
until you find somewhere.
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22. I love you.
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23. (ECHOING) 'The weekend starts here.'
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24. Excuse me. Mind if I sit here?
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25. Er, no.
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26. Thanks.
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27. What you looking for?
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28. What have you got?
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29. Hm?
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30. No, what are you looking for?
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31. Sorry.
Thought you were a drug dealer.
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32. Oh, thanks.
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33. That's all right. I'm flat-hunting.
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34. Oh, right.
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35. Yeah.
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36. I'm staying with mates, not really
mates, people I met in a squat,
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37. ..I moved in with them, which was
fine... Are you really interested?
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38. Anyway, there was this guy and...
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39. ..I didn't really know, well, really
what happened was, the thing is,
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40. .. rather confront, I thought...
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41. Skip to the end.
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42. So I'm moving out.
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43. I hate flat-hunting.
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44. I do not envy you at all.
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45. Could I borrow that after you?
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46. Mind if I sit here?
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47. No.
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48. Any luck?
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49. No. It's early days yet. So...
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50. ♪ Getting to know
you, getting to know all about you
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51. Hi.
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52. Hi. How's it going?
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53. Same as always.
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54. That bad, huh?
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55. (SOBBING) I can't do this any more.
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56. Whoa, there, Pickle.
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57. Every morning it's the same, I buy
the paper and I circle them all
and I phone them,
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58. .. only to discover they've been
taken by a bunch of fucking psychics
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59. You've only looked at a few.
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60. They've all been infested rat holes.
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61. I'm in the same boat.
You don't see me crying.
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62. Hang on. Didn't see that one.
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63. "Spacious 2-bedroom apartment,
fully furnished, £90 a week."
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64. "Professional couple only."
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65. (SOBBING) Why? Why? Why?
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66. You could always pretend.
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67. What do you mean?
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68. Got any homeless male friends?
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69. (CLEARS THROAT) Well, I do have
one homeless male friend.
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70. Who?
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71. 'You were born in Highgate to John
and Julia Bisley, 17 September 1974'
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72. Your sister Katy used your Batman
comics to decorate her cardboard car
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73. You drove the car into the pond,
hitting your head on the fountain,
thus getting your scar.
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74. Your best friend Mike
is a weapons expert.
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75. MIAOW
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76. Yes!
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77. Er, yeah.
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78. You have a potentially fatal allergy
to Brazil nuts.
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79. Yes, I have no memory of Christmas
1979. Or Christmas 1994 either.
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80. Why not?
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81. I don't know.
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82. You're an aspiring graphic artist
hoping to work for Dark Star Comics.
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83. You did a sleeve for your sister's
boyfriend's brother's band.
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84. You supplement that £50 by working
part time in a comic shop
called Fantasy Bazaar.
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85. I'm the assistant manager.
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86. How many people work for you?
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87. It's just me and Bilbo.
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88. 'Who's Bilbo?'
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89. 'He's the manager.'
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90. You're not a sci-fi nerd?
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91. Discussing The X-Files
on the Internet?
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92. The speculations of
contemporary authors were probably
never closer to the truth.
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93. Your preferred transport
is skateboarding.
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94. 'You masturbate over
Gillian Anderson.'
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95. Who told you that?
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96. It was a joke.
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97. FHM voted her Most Sexy Woman in 1996
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98. What about you? I wasn't placed.
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99. You split with your girlfriend,
who got off with your friend Dwayne.
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100. He's not my friend.
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101. We don't need to talk about that.
It obviously hit you hard.
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102. You prefer a tight-legged
cotton pant to the boxer.
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103. Is this necessary?
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104. What if we're asked intimate
questions? We're a couple. Do me.
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105. 'OK. You were born in Richmond
in 1975 to Ben and Emily Steiner.'
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106. You have a brother and sister,
older and younger.
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107. You graduated from Kingston Poly...
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108. University.
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109. Whatever, in 1996 with a degree
in Humanities - a Third.
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110. It's what I expected. Michelle
from EastEnders got a Third.
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111. It's not the grade that matters,
it's being there.
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112. Your boyfriend Richard
is studying in hell.
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113. Hull.
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114. You want to be a journalist,
but you haven't tried that yet.
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115. Your best friend's called Twist
and she works in fashion.
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116. You've got no skincare routine.
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117. You're scared of mice and spiders
but oh so much greater is your fear
they will crossbreed...
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118. ..to form mice-spiders, immobilising
humans in giant webs to steal cheese.
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119. I never said that.
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120. That'd be good though.
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121. That's it.
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122. By the way, my name's Daisy.
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123. All right, I'm Tim, hi.
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124. Hey! What's that for?
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125. In that film with Andie MacDowell
and Gerard Depardieu, they get
married so he gets a US work
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