1. AHEM!
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2. GREETINGS, CITIZEN,
AND WELCOME TO MY SHOW.
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3. WELL, THANKS FOR HAVING ME
HERE, SPACE GHOST.
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4. PLEASE IDENTIFY YOURSELF
TO THE UNIVERSE.
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5. MY NAME
IS MICHAEL MOORE,
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6. AND, UM, I'M—
I'M REALLY NOBODY.
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7. HA HA HA!
THAT CAN'T BE TRUE.
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8. I WOULDN'T HAVE
NOBODY ON MY SHOW.
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9. HEY, CAN WE STOP
FOR A SECOND?
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10. WELL, OF COURSE.
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11. OK.
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12. YOU'RE NOT ACTUALLY
SPACE GHOST, ARE YOU?
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13. I WASN'T PREPARED FOR—
I THOUGHT IT WAS ACTUALLY
GOING TO BE THE CHARACTER.
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14. YES, SIR.
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15. YOU'RE LIKE
A REALLY BAD READER
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16. THAT'S READING
THE SCRIPT.
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17. WELL, ACTUALLY,
I'M AN INTERN, AND—
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18. FORMER INTERN!
I THOUGHT I TO—
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19. YOU BETTER RUN, JOEY!
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20. CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP
AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
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21. MOLTAR!
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22. UH, I WASN'T READY.
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23. UH! I'LL DO IT AGAIN.
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24. TIME?
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25. 4.2.
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26. UH!
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27. TIME?
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28. UM, 3.9.
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29. AGAIN!
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30. TIME.
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31. OH! 5.8.
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32. OH. ONE MORE.
ONCE MORE.
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33. THE GUEST
IS WAITING.
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34. LET HIM WAIT!
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35. I NEED TO GET THAT TIME
DOWN TO 3.5 BY 6:00 SUNDAY,
OR I'M A DEAD MAN!
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36. OH, DID I SAY 5.8?
I MEANT... 2.3.
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37. YES! I'M SAVED!
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38. NICE GOING, SIR.
CONGRATULATIONS.
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39. MOLTAR, DIDN'T I ORDER
YOU TO REVOKE JOEY'S
SECURITY CLEARANCE?
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40. GET OFF MY BACK.
I'M NOT YOUR SLAVE.
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41. YES, YOU ARE.
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42. I AM? UH, WELL, WHAT
WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?
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43. NEVER MIND.
IT'S TOO LATE.
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44. THE ONE THEY CALL
JOEY WALKS AMONG US.
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45. HE JUST WANTS A JOB.
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46. THAT'S JUST WHAT
HE WANTS YOU TO THINK.
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47. WELL, IT'S WORKING.
HA HA.
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48. MOLTAR, SEND IN
MY FIRST GUEST.
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49. HI, MIKE.
UH, SORRY ABOUT ALL
THE TROUBLE BEFORE.
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50. THAT PUNK WAS
SUPPOSED TO BE BANNED
FROM THE PREMISES.
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51. NO, NO, IT'S OK.
YOU'RE FINE.
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52. IT JUST THREW ME.
THAT'S ALL.
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53. IF YOU JUST WANT
TO GO BACK TO BED,
I'LL UNDERSTAND.
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54. THAT'S OK.
WE CAN START AGAIN.
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55. FROM THE TOP?
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56. YES.
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57. STOP TAPE.
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58. UH, SPACE GHOST, UH,
I THINK YOU MIGHT—
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59. AND ROLL TAPE.
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60. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
PLEASE WELCOME
MICHAEL MOORE!
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61. THANKS
FOR HAVING ME HERE.
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62. IT'S, UH,
IT'S REALLY GREAT.
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63. SO, MIKE, HAVE YOU
EVER ACTUALLY
WATCHED MY SHOW?
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64. YEAH, YEAH.
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65. REALLY?
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66. ALL THE TIME.
EVERY WEEK, IN FACT.
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67. YOU'RE KIDDING.
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68. OF COURSE I'M KIDDING.
HA HA HA!
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69. I'VE NEVER SEEN
THIS SHOW.
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70. WHAT PART
DO YOU LIKE BEST?
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71. NO, NO. YOU'RE NOT
LISTENING, SPACE GHOST.
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72. I'VE NEVER SEEN
THIS SHOW.
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73. DO YOU PREFER THE COMEDY
OR THE INTERVIEWS
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74. OR BOTH?
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75. NO, SPACE GHOST.
HELLO? HELLO!
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76. I'VE SEEN
ALL YOUR STUFF, TOO.
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77. OK, GIVE ME
AN EXAMPLE.
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78. GIVE YOU AN EXAMPLE.
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79. YEAH.
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80. OK.
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81. NOW?
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82. YES, SPACE GHOST.
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83. DO I HAVE TO?
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84. ALL RIGHT.
UH, I REMEMBER
YOU WERE THERE...
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85. MM-HMM.
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86. AND YOU WERE TALKING
TO THE MAN...
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87. UH-HUH.
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88. THE MAN—
WHAT WAS IT—RAMBO.
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89. NO. NO.
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90. AND THERE WERE
THESE THINGS—
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91. THINGS? YOU HAVEN'T
SEEN ANY OF MY STUFF,
SPACE GHOST.
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92. SEEN ALL OF IT.
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93. OH, YEAH, YOU KNOW—
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94. Joey, whispering:
Excuse me, Zorak... sir.
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95. EHH...
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96. Down here.
Did you get
a chance
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97. to read those
scripts that
I sent you?
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98. NO! GO AWAY.
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99. I'll just leave
my resume here
for you.
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100. GET OUT OF HERE!
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101. JOEY! UHH!
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102. AAH!
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103. ZORAK, HOW ARE YOU
DOING OVER THERE?
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104. I'M BLEEDING.
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105. HE'S FINE, MIKE.
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106. MOLTAR IS OVER THERE.
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107. HEY, HOW ARE YOU
DOING, MOLTAR?
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108. I'M BEING EXPLOITED.
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109. HE'S FINE, TOO, MIKE.
NOW TELL ME MORE
ABOUT TEXAS.
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110. SPACE GHOST IS A MONSTER.
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111. YOU SHOULD REALLY
BLOW THE COVER OFF
THIS RAT HOLE.
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112. MOLTAR!
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113. HELP ME!
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114. MOLTAR, MICHAEL DOESN'T
WANT TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR
SILLY PERSONAL PROBLEMS.
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115. HE'S MUCH MORE
INTERESTED
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116. IN DOING ONE OF HIS
IRREVERENT DOCU-COMEDIES
ABOUT ME.
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117. RIGHT, MIKE?
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118. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?
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119. AM I SUPPOSED
TO FOLLOW YOU AROUND
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120. OR FIND OUT WHO
YOUR CORPORATE OWNERS ARE?
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121. SURE, FOLLOW ME AROUND.
WHAT DO I CARE?
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122. SO WHO ARE YOUR CORPORATE
OWNERS, SPACE GHOST?
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123. IT'S COMPLICATED,
BUT BASICALLY,
I BELONG TO GOD.
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124. OHH.
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125. THAT'S RIGHT, MIKE.
GOD OWNS ME.
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126. HE SPEAKS TO ME
THROUGH HIS SUBSIDIARY
TIME-WARNER.
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127. YES, YOU KNOW,
THEY OWN ROGER & ME.
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128. UH, ROGER AND I, MIKE.
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129. YES, SO WE'RE SORT OF LIKE
CORPORATE BRETHREN HERE.
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130. ROGER'S YOUR BROTHER.
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131. OOH, I GET IT.
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132. LET'S SAY HI TO ALL
OUR FRIENDS AT TIME-WARNER.
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133. HELLO, FRIENDS.
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134. I LOVE BEANS?
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135. YOU KNOW, THAT SONG
MEANS SO MUCH TO ME.
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136. WELL, YOU KNOW,
I WROTE THAT SONG
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137. WHILE I WAS EATING
SOME BEANS.
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138. THAT'S AWESOME.
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139. SO, MICHAEL,
WHAT DO YOU THINK
OF THE GHOST PLANET?
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140. IT'S—IT'S, UH...
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141. I'VE BEEN IN WORSE PLACES.
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142. NAME ONE.
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143. WELL, IT'S A KIDS' SHOW,
ISN'T IT?
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144. ACTUALLY, NO.
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145. MY AUDIENCE
IS COMPRISED LARGELY OF
RETIRED NAVAL OFFICERS.
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146. AHOY, GENTLEMEN.
I SALUTE YOU.
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147. MIKE, HAVE YOU EVER BEEN
TO THE CASPIAN SEA?
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148. NO.
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149. SOME PEOPLE THINK
IT'S A LAKE,
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150. BUT THEY'RE SO WRONG.
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151. IT'S A LAKE!
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152. IT'S A SEA!
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153. IT'S A LAKE!
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154. IT'S A SEA!
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155. WHAT, YOU
BEEN THERE?
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156. IT'S A SEA, MIKE.
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157. UH-HUH.
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158. AND WHERE ARE YOU
ACTUALLY PUT TOGETHER,
SPACE GHOST?
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159. LIKE, WHO DRAWS YOU?
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160. OH, A BUNCH OF GUYS.
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161. A BUNCH OF GUYS?
WHERE AT?
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162. UH, SOME KIDS
DO IT SOMEWHERE.
I'M NOT SURE.
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163. YEAH, IT PROBABLY—
IS THIS ANIMATION DONE
IN THE UNITED STATES?
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164. YEAH, I THINK SO.
IS THAT PART OF KOREA?
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165. NO.
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166. THEY DON'T MAKE
MUCH MONEY. I KNOW THAT.
HA HA HA!
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167. HEY, MOLTAR?
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168. WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
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169. WOULD YOU MIND IF I
JUST STOOD OVER HERE
AND WATCHED YOU WORK?
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170. ALL RIGHT,
BUT STAY OUT OF MY WAY!
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171. I CAN'T BE DISTRACTED.
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172. WHAT'S THE BUDGET
ON THIS SHOW, ANYWAYS?
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173. NOT MUCH,
I'LL TELL YOU THAT.
WANT TO KNOW WHY?
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174. I'LL LET YOU IN
ON A LITTLE SECRET,
MIKE.
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175. I DON'T PAY ANYBODY!
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176. MY STAFF HERE,
THEY WORK FOR FREE!
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177. OH, REALLY?
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178. YEAH. MY OVERHEAD
FOR THIS SHOW IS
VIRTUALLY NOTHING,
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179. EXCEPT FOR
AN OCCASIONAL—
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180. LISTEN, I'M GOING
TO TAKE A NAP.
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181. YOU STAY HERE,
AND IF ANYTHING GOES
WRONG, RUN AND GET ME.
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182. OH, YOU BET!
YOU CAN COUNT ON ME,
SIR. YOU JUST—
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183. DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING!
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184. THANK YOU!
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185. WELL, YEAH, I GUESS
I'D LIKE TO FIND OUT
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186. WHO PUT YOU UP TO THIS,
WHO CONTROLS YOU,
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187. AND BASICALLY, YOU KNOW,
HOW YOU'RE TREATING
YOUR EMPLOYEES HERE.
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188. OH, THEY'RE ENSLAVED.
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189. HMM. OK.
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190. OH, IT'S NOT THE KIND
YOU'RE THINKING OF.
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191. THIS IS THE GOOD KIND.
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192. LIES!
ALL OF IT!
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193. THE BANDLEADER OVER HERE
ISN'T SO SURE ABOUT THAT.
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194. SPACE GHOST!
WHAT, ZORAK?
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195. I NEED A 5-MINUTE
BREAK.
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196. NO BREAKS.
GET BACK TO WORK!
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197. THEN I'LL NEED
A SPIT TROUGH.
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198. SORRY. WE'RE OVER BUDGET
AS IT IS.
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199. MY 6-WEEK "HUMOR
ON THE RHINE" JUNKET
NEARLY BUSTED US.
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200. AND HOW ABOUT
A PIANO BENCH?
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201. I'VE BEEN SQUATTING
FOR 4 YEARS!
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202. SIT DOWN ON YOUR OWN TIME.
I DON'T PAY YOU TO SIT.
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203. YOU DON'T PAY ME
AT ALL!
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204. YOU'LL GET WHAT
I GIVE YOU AND LIKE IT!
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205. YOU SEE, MIKE,
HERE IN SPACE,
WE'RE ALL EQUALS...
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206. EXCEPT FOR MOLTAR
AND ZORAK.
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207. ISN'T THAT GREAT?
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208. WANT HIM TO DO ANYTHING
FOR YOU, MIKE?
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209. SHALL HE DANCE
FOR YOUR PLEASURE?
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210. DANCE, MANTIS!
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211. DANCE FOR MICHAEL'S
PLEASURE!
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212. AAH! HEY, MY FOOT! OW!
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213. HEY!
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214. HEY, MIKE, AREN'T YOU
IMPRESSED BY MY POWER
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215. OVER MY LOWLY
SUBORDINATES?
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216. OH, COME ON.
THEY'RE HELPING YOU
DO THIS SHOW HERE.
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217. THEY'RE NOT WORTH
THE PAPER I LINE
THEIR FILTHY CAGES WITH.
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218. YOU MAKE ME SLEEP
IN MY OWN DEBRIS!
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219. EXCUSE ME.
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220. AAH!
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221. EH!
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222. YOU ARE DOWN ON HIM
TODAY.
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223. I'M DOWN ON HIM
EVERY DAY.
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224. HE'S MORALLY BANKRUPT.
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225. HE'S THE GLUE THAT HOLDS
THIS SHOW TOGETHER HERE.
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226. OH, PLEASE.
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227. THE MAN, HE GIVES
AND GIVES AND GIVES
FOR YOU ON THIS SHOW.
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228. IT'S BEST NOT TO
MAKE NICE WITH ZORAK.
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229. HE'LL EAT YOU FASTER
THAN A SWISS BLACKSMITH
AT A CORKBOARD CONVENTION.
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230. I PROBABLY LOOK
LIKE A MONTH-LONG MEAL
TO HIM, DON'T I?
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231. STAY AWAY.
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232. UH-OH.
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233. WE JUST LOST OUR CAMERA.
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234. WHAT'S HAPPENING THERE?
MOLTAR! MOLTAR!
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235. JOEY!
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236. I'M SORRY, SIR.
IT'LL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
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237. YOU GOT THAT
STRAIGHT, SON.
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238. TAKE THAT!
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239. WHOA! WHAT'S
GOING ON IN HERE?
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240. JOEY MESSED UP
MY SHOW,
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241. SO I MESSED UP HIS FACE.
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242. YOU DIDN'T USE
YOUR POWER BANDS
ON HIM, DID YOU?
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243. YEAH. HA HA HA!
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244. ISN'T THAT RIGHT,
JOEY?
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245. JOEY?
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246. HE DOESN'T LOOK
SO GOOD.
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247. I DON'T KNOW.
HE LOOKS OK TO ME.
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248. BIG CRYBABY.
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249. GET RID OF HIM.
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250. YOU GET RID OF HIM.
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251. THIS COULD COST ME
MY CAREER.
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252. WAY TO GO, JOEY!
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253. CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP
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254. AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
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255. CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY
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256. THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING
INSTITUTE, INC.
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257. Space Ghost: GREAT SHOW,
EVERYBODY. SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.
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258. HA HA HA!
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259. I HATE THAT GUY.
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