1. Um, uh, Eric, um, hi.
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2. I-I-I'm Moltar, I-I-I'm Moltar,
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3. and, um, I—I really like your show,
you know, that chips show?
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4. You know, that chips show?
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5. Where you guys, like, wreck all that stuff,
all the cars... Got any Rouge?
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6. Connie! Get in there and get that man some Rouge!
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7. This is Erik estrada, for crying out loud!
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8. I've got to do it all around here.
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9. Yup, I'm the captain of this show.
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10. That's enough, Connie, he's not a clown.
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11. Thank you.
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12. Hi, Moltar.
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13. Ha ha ha ha ha!
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14. You're the man, Erik.
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15. You and me, we got a thing going.
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16. We like each other.
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17. Yeah, right.
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18. Ha ha ha ha!
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19. Ha ha ha ha!
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20. Greetings! I'm space g— Go to the desk!
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21. Ok.
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22. What now?
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23. Erik estrada! Poncherello!
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24. The ch master!
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25. Here he is now!
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26. All riiiight!
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27. Whoo hoo hoo.
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28. Cut it out, Moltar, that music guy is first.
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29. Uh-uh! Ponch is first!
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30. Music guy! Erik!
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31. Music guy! Erik!
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32. Hey! Where's zorak?
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33. I was just... Doing something.
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34. Down there.
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35. Without you.
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36. Music guy!
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37. Erik, Erik, Erik, Erik, Erik!
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38. Hey—my show! My show!
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39. Now just settle down, we'll get to Erik.
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40. When the earth cools.
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41. Ladies and gentlemen, Dr. funkenstein
himself, Mr. George Clinton.
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42. Roof, roof, roof, how you doing?
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43. That was great, bring on Erik.
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44. Hey! I just started here.
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45. I thought you were done.
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46. Give me back George Clinton.
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47. No. I dropped him.
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48. Good move.
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49. And he broke. So there.
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50. And he broke. So there.
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51. Aren't you busy with something?
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52. Oh, yeah. Thanks for reminding me.
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53. See you later.
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54. What's he doing?
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55. Mmmm... Look at all that human hair.
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56. Cool.
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57. Who owns that dog?
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58. And where's that music guy?
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59. Send him out, Moltar. No.
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60. Send him out, Moltar. No.
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61. Send him out, Moltar! No.
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62. Send him out, Moltar! No.
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63. Send him out, Moltar! No.
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64. I'm not going to tell you again!
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65. I'm telling you— I'm not going to tell you again!
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66. I am telling you— no.
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67. I am not going to tell you again!
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68. No, no, no, no, no!
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69. Time out!
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70. Aw, man!
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71. And you will stay in time out until
I'm done with the funkmaster.
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72. I'm really sorry, George.
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73. Moltar's got this estrada problem.
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74. Yeah, he wants to shake his hand
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75. and then pull it up to his mouth
real quick, so he can kiss it.
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76. That's zorak.
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77. Oh, I was wondering who was that guy.
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78. Look at him, he's got a full head of hair.
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79. Yeah, that toupee looks funny.
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80. What toupee?
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81. This is my natural hair.
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82. Oh, I figured that was fake.
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83. This is the ancient hair from a young king's tomb.
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84. It gives me... The power.
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85. The power to do what?
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86. Uh... Stuff.
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87. What kind of stuff?
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88. Powerful stuff.
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89. Oh, he has a good illusion on
something on top of his head.
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90. That's a nice trick.
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91. No trick zorak plays is ever nice.
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92. Watch as I destroy him!
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93. I kind of figured you would.
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94. I paid $40 for that rug!
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95. And look what it got you.
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96. The king will be very disappointed.
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97. King like that don't need hair.
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98. Speaking of hair, what's up with your 'do?
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99. Oh, my 'do.
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100. Well, what comes around went that way.
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101. And I can get around, you know what I'm saying?
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102. No. I wear a hood.
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103. You wear a hood? I liv in the 'hood.
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104. I have a 'hood dwelling,
but how would I wear a 'hood?
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105. It's not hard.
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106. I take an entire neighborhood,
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107. put it on my head, and dance around
where the neighborhood used to be.
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108. Where the neighborhood used to be.
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109. The people who live in the neighborhood
are terrified by my hopping,
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110. and some of them fall off my head and are trampled.
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111. It is then that the dance
becomes a dance of sadness.
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112. Why are you telling me this?
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113. Because I care about the innocent
victims of my ill-advised dance of joy.
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114. Oh.
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115. Fries don't come with that deadly shake.
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116. Shake like that don't need fries.
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117. Can I come out now? I've been very good.
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118. Have you learned your lesson?
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119. You mean don't go stripping in the woods?
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120. That's a good lesson, Moltar,
albeit not exactly the lesson I had hoped.
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121. I'm coming out.
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122. Oh, all right.
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123. What's this joker still doing here?
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124. Go forth and funk, my child.
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125. Funk this, you wookie!
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126. This is nuts.
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127. Bring him back, Moltar.
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128. Let go of the lever.
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129. Let go of the lever.
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130. You let go of the lever!
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131. I'm serious. Let go.
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132. I'm serious. Let go.
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133. No, let go! I said let go!
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134. I said let go!
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135. I said let go!
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136. I said it, too!
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137. Give me that lever,
I'm going to... The breach of peace,
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138. The breach of peace,
fueled by a sprinkle of pandemonium.
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139. The vultures have come.
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140. If you don't let go of that lever right now,
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141. I'm going to punch you in the nose!
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142. I don't have a nose!
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143. Eww, you don't?
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144. I have a cadmium alloy inhalant receptacle.
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145. Oh, well, uh, then... I'll kick you in the hands!
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146. No, please, not the hands!
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147. Here I go, kicking you in the hands!
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148. Put your hands down here!
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149. Come on, pretty boy! How's that feel?
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150. You like that?
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151. To the death, you toads!
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152. Spread the hatred far and wide!
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153. You're hurting me.
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154. But I'm giving you my hands.
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155. Not fair, let go of my cape.
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156. I'll take your mask off.
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157. Not the mask! Not the mask!
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158. Well, Moltar, I... Guess I lost the fight.
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159. No, Space Ghost, I lost the fight.
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160. We both lost,
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161. therefore we both won.
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162. I apologize.
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163. Ahh, you big lug.
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164. I love you, too.
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165. Give me a big ol' hug.
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166. Oh, yeah... Frack!
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167. Hello, everybody!
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168. And now, back to the show.
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169. Pinhead!
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170. What?
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171. Nothing. Moltworm.
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172. Nothing. Moltworm.
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173. What did you just say, just then?
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174. Nothing!
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175. Snapdragon.
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176. I heard that, you said snapdragon.
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177. Did not! Did too!
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178. Did not!
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179. That's creepy, isn't it?
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180. And now, let's welcome Erik estrada.
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181. Hang on a second.
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182. I wrote some questions for him.
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183. Well, hurry up!
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184. Here!
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185. Welcome to the show, citizen.
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186. Thank you.
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187. Hi, Moltar.
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188. You're the man! Whoo hoo! Yeah!
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189. You're the man! Whoo hoo! Yeah!
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190. Going to stand there all day?
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191. I'm not hurting anything. Just talk.
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192. I'm not hurting anything. Just talk.
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193. Don't worry, I'll read your stupid questions.
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194. You better.
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195. Moltar's first question... Well,
it's not really a question,
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196. it just says, "Moltar is your number-one fan."
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197. Yeah, I know, we're buds.
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198. You are the man!
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199. Question t— whoo!
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200. Question two says, "how do you
handle the pressures of being
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201. an international sex symbol?"
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202. Ohhhh, how do I handle it?
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203. Well, you just have to just say,
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204. "ok, thank you, I take that as a compliment."
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205. Ok, thank you, I take that as a compliment.
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206. And don't get offended by it,
or don't think that it gives you a license
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207. to practice... Sex... With just anybody.
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208. Ok.
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209. Oh, the sounds of happiness fester in my brain!
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210. Let me ask a question.
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211. Sure. Go on, molt.
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212. We know each other, I can call him molt.
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213. Whoo, doggie!
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214. Shut up!
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215. You and me, zorak, after the show!
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216. You and me, zorak, after the show!
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217. You name the time, scab!
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218. I thought I just did!
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219. Oh, right.
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220. After the show.
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221. What am I becoming?
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222. Ask your question!
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223. Ok!
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224. Erik, why was sergeant getraer always so mean?
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225. Well, the sergeant never got
out of the station much.
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226. Well, the sergeant never got
out of the station much.
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227. He didn't get to ride and meet the people,
meet all the children—
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228. or maybe your pants were too tight.
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229. Or maybe— oh... Ahem.
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230. Hey, remember the episode where
you saved Heather Locklear
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231. from the biker gang?
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232. Yes.
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233. Ooh, and remember the time
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234. when the skateboarder grabbed onto
the back of that Chevy Malibu?
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235. When the skateboarder grabbed onto
the back of that Chevy Malibu?
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236. Right, right.
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237. And kept on skating? That was so cool!
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238. That wasn't very smart, that wasn't really cool.
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239. Well, that's what I meant.
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240. That was totally uncool!
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241. Let the power of ponch compel you!
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242. Shut, up, zorak!
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243. Zorak? Who's zorak?
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244. That thing over there.
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245. He's pretty mean.
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246. Let the power of ponch compel you!
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247. I said, shut up!
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248. You're wrecking my interview!
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249. Let the power of ponch compel you!
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250. Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up!
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251. Stop yelling!
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252. Ok...
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253. Let the— shut up!
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254. Hey, Baker, this is 7-Mary-3.
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255. We got a 9-11 in progress.
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256. I need you over here.
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257. Drop that burrito and get over here.
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258. A 911 in progress?
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259. Up and away!
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260. Let the power of ponch compel you!
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261. You're ruining my chance of a lifetime!
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262. Shut up! Shut up!
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263. Erik? Just give me a second, I can fix it.
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264. Noooooooo!
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265. Oh, no.
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266. "It's a 911, better hurry! 911!"
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267. I hate this job.
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268. Hey, it's hot in here.
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269. Wonder if the air conditioner's broke—
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270. I'm here for you— to make children smile,
to make profits rise.
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271. I am the subservient of the network.
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