1. Mrph rmhmhm rm!
Mrph rmhmhm rm!Copy !req
2. Yes?
Oh, hello, boys.Copy !req
3. Hello, sir.
South Park Junior Detectives.Copy !req
4. We were wondering
if you have any crimesCopy !req
5. you need solved for a dollar.Copy !req
6. Ooh, little crime stoppers,
huh?Copy !req
7. Well, I'm afraid I don't have
any crimesCopy !req
8. I need solved right now.Copy !req
9. Aw, shit.Copy !req
10. All right, sir. Well, please
call us if you need anything.Copy !req
11. I'll do that.
Have fun, boys.Copy !req
12. Stupid assholes.Copy !req
13. How come nobody has a crime
to solve?Copy !req
14. Maybe starting a detective club
isn't such a great idea.Copy !req
15. It's a great idea. We just have
to keep working at it.Copy !req
16. Oh, hello there, boys!Copy !req
17. Hello, ma'am. We're detectives
with the South Park Crime Unit.Copy !req
18. Do you have any crimes
you need solved for a dollar?Copy !req
19. Ooh.
Neighborhood detectives, huh?Copy !req
20. Well, let me th—
Ooh, yes!Copy !req
21. There is something!
- Really?Copy !req
22. Yes — two days ago, I put
a fresh-baked cherry pieCopy !req
23. out on my windowsill to cool.Copy !req
24. And later, when I went
to get it, it was gone.Copy !req
25. My God.Copy !req
26. Have you reported this
to any other authorities?Copy !req
27. No, but I think it's
a perfect case for you kids.Copy !req
28. Cool! We'll see what
we can find, ma'am!Copy !req
29. We're on the case.Copy !req
30. What have you got, Marsh?Copy !req
31. Detective McCormick found
something interesting.Copy !req
32. Jesus.
We're too late.Copy !req
33. I think we can piece
this case together now.Copy !req
34. Seen for the first time
on HBC...Copy !req
35. My pie tin! Ooh, but what
happened to the pie?Copy !req
36. Well, we've all
talked it through,Copy !req
37. and we've come up with a theory.Copy !req
38. What do you think happened,
little detectives?Copy !req
39. You said you set the pie
on the windowsill,Copy !req
40. where it must have sat
for some time.Copy !req
41. But its sweet smell attracted
the attention of somebody.Copy !req
42. Your husband!Copy !req
43. He wanted that pie badly,Copy !req
44. but he knew that he was
not allowed to eat it yet.Copy !req
45. Slowly, the rage built
inside his mind.Copy !req
46. "Why won't she let me eat
that pie?Copy !req
47. Why does she always stop me
from doing what I want to do?"Copy !req
48. His only solution became
obvious — kill her.Copy !req
49. His plan was to use a hammer.Copy !req
50. Bash, bash, bash your
skull in, causing instant death.Copy !req
51. To make it impossible
for police to identify the body,Copy !req
52. he would use a shovel
to remove your head...Copy !req
53. Then saw off the arms and legs.Copy !req
54. The torso,
he would dump into the lake.Copy !req
55. The arms and legs,
he would dissolveCopy !req
56. with acid and lye
in the bathtub.Copy !req
57. And then, finally,
he'd be able to eat that pie.Copy !req
58. But before he could
go through with his entire plan,Copy !req
59. he discovered that the pie
had already been eaten —Copy !req
60. by your dog.Copy !req
61. Looks like the game is over,
old man!Copy !req
62. Oh my God!Copy !req
63. What kind of television
have you kids been watching?Copy !req
64. Just the news.Copy !req
65. All right, all right.
You — You boys run along now!Copy !req
66. Hey, you owe us a dollar, lady!Copy !req
67. Fine! Here!
Just go!Copy !req
68. Wow! Look, you guys!
Our first dollar!Copy !req
69. We're in business.Copy !req
70. Kenny, you got the F.A.G.
on that perp in Washington?Copy !req
71. Boys, you have a little visitor.Copy !req
72. Is this
the South Park Crime Unit?Copy !req
73. Oh!Copy !req
74. Yes, it is!Copy !req
75. I lost my dolly.Copy !req
76. Thank you, Miss secretary.
That will be all.Copy !req
77. And get us some more cookies
and coffee!Copy !req
78. We're not paying you
to sit on your ass!Copy !req
79. Do you know
where your doll is?Copy !req
80. If I knew where it was,
it wouldn't be lost.Copy !req
81. All right, Sarah.
Come over here.Copy !req
82. I want you to describe
what the doll looks likeCopy !req
83. to our sketch artist, Kenny.Copy !req
84. She has curly blond hair...Copy !req
85. and a red dress...Copy !req
86. and a turned-up nose.Copy !req
87. And a blue bow in her hair.Copy !req
88. You got it, Ken?Copy !req
89. All right.
Let's see.Copy !req
90. Damn it, Kenny!
That's not what she said!Copy !req
91. Put that away, dude.Copy !req
92. Don't worry, ma'am.
We'll find your doll.Copy !req
93. No sign of forced entry.Copy !req
94. But the window isn't locked.Copy !req
95. Right, so it's possible
the thief sat out in that tree.Copy !req
96. He would have watched Sarah
with her doll,Copy !req
97. possibly while cutting the palms
of his hand with a large knife.Copy !req
98. The pain gave him sick pleasure.Copy !req
99. Disposing of the doll
wouldn't be easy.Copy !req
100. He would've brought a shovel
to decapitate it.Copy !req
101. We're going to need
semen samplesCopy !req
102. from everything in this room.Copy !req
103. All right.
Let's do this by the books.Copy !req
104. O'Donnell, get me smears of all
the places the doll used to be.Copy !req
105. Mitchell, run a tap
on the phone.Copy !req
106. Hey, kid, what are you doing?Copy !req
107. Agent Tucker, FBI.
And you?Copy !req
108. Detective Marsh.Copy !req
109. I'm in charge
of this investigation.Copy !req
110. Not anymore you're not.Copy !req
111. Hey, this is our case.
You can't come in and take over.Copy !req
112. Can't we?Copy !req
113. You guys are playing detectives.
We're playing FBI.Copy !req
114. That gives us jurisdiction
over you.Copy !req
115. Aw, crap!Copy !req
116. I want choppers on the roof
ready to go.Copy !req
117. Dude, we've been working
this case since 2:30.Copy !req
118. Good. Then you can help us by
telling me everything you know.Copy !req
119. Son of a bitch.
Stupid FBI.Copy !req
120. Well, I guess we can go back
to playing laundromat.Copy !req
121. No, we're not gonna stop
playing detectives.Copy !req
122. We've just got to find that doll
before those FBI guys do.Copy !req
123. Mrph.
- Yeah, but how?Copy !req
124. We're gonna have to start
bringing in peopleCopy !req
125. for questioning.
- Right.Copy !req
126. And I think I know
exactly where to start.Copy !req
127. Where were you this morning
at 9:00, Butters?Copy !req
128. I was at home.Copy !req
129. Your story is full of holes,
and I'm gonna beat your assCopy !req
130. if you don't start telling
the truth.Copy !req
131. Mrph, rmhmhm rm mrph rmh.Copy !req
132. Mrph rmhmhm rm, rmh.Copy !req
133. They've really gotten good
at this good-cop, bad-cop thing.Copy !req
134. You're going down, Butters.
You hear me?Copy !req
135. Mrph, rmh mrph rm.
Mrph rmhmhm rm.Copy !req
136. You're a worthless two-dollar
criminal, and you're lying!Copy !req
137. Mrph, rmhmhm rm
mrph rmh.Copy !req
138. I don't have nothing to confess.
Honestly!Copy !req
139. Fine.Copy !req
140. Then you won't mind giving us
a semen sample.Copy !req
141. How do I do that?Copy !req
142. You make the semen
come out of your bodyCopy !req
143. and put it in this cup!Copy !req
144. How do I make semen
come out of my body?Copy !req
145. Stop playing games!Copy !req
146. I'm not playing.
I really don't know.Copy !req
147. That does it.
Wait right here!Copy !req
148. You guys, did you hear that?Copy !req
149. Butters doesn't knowCopy !req
150. how you make semen come out
of your body.Copy !req
151. How do you make semen
come out?Copy !req
152. I don't know.
I was hoping you guys did.Copy !req
153. It's that thing we learned about
in schoolCopy !req
154. where you pull on your wiener
until white stuff comes out.Copy !req
155. Really?
- Oh, right.Copy !req
156. You're supposed to pull
and master-ber-nate your wienerCopy !req
157. really fast.
- Oh, okay.Copy !req
158. Okay, retard.Copy !req
159. You really don't know
how to make semen come out?Copy !req
160. No.
- Follow me to the bathroom.Copy !req
161. Mrph, rmhmhm rm.
Mrph rmh rmphm.Copy !req
162. Now, go sit on the toiletCopy !req
163. and pull and tug on your wiener
until white stuff comes out.Copy !req
164. Then put it in this cup.
- My wiener?Copy !req
165. Yes, retard,
semen comes from your wiener.Copy !req
166. Now, do it!Copy !req
167. Well, Butters?Copy !req
168. I'm pulling on my wiener,
but nothing's happening.Copy !req
169. Well, pull harder!Copy !req
170. Ow!Copy !req
171. Ow!Copy !req
172. It's not working.Copy !req
173. Try doing it faster.Copy !req
174. Ow. Ow.Copy !req
175. Ow. Ow, ow, ow, ow,
ow, ow, ow, ow.Copy !req
176. No. Nothing.Copy !req
177. Butters, you want to go to jail
for the rest of your life?Copy !req
178. No!Copy !req
179. Then you better get that sample
no matter how long it takes!Copy !req
180. Okay!Copy !req
181. Cartman! Cartman!Copy !req
182. We just got a tip that a doll
was found near Fosse's house!Copy !req
183. Let's go.Copy !req
184. Ow. Ow!Copy !req
185. Huh, okay,
Miss — Miss Jones, huh.Copy !req
186. Me and Dr. Flick here
just need to check your vagina.Copy !req
187. Huh huh huh.Copy !req
188. Huh. That's gay.
- Yeah, that's gay.Copy !req
189. Kyle.Copy !req
190. What?Copy !req
191. What?Copy !req
192. I see two guys inside.Copy !req
193. They have Sarah Peterson's doll,
you stupid Jew!Copy !req
194. They've got the doll.Copy !req
195. Okay. Okay.
Ready?Copy !req
196. Ring the doorbell.Copy !req
197. W-W-Who is it?Copy !req
198. South Park Junior Detectives.Copy !req
199. We know you have
Sarah Peterson's doll.Copy !req
200. Heh.
They're playing detective.Copy !req
201. Huh huh.
That's gay.Copy !req
202. Huh huh.
You're gay!Copy !req
203. What do we do now?Copy !req
204. I don't know.Copy !req
205. If they're not gonna give us
back the doll,Copy !req
206. we have no choice.Copy !req
207. Let's go tell on them.Copy !req
208. Dude, we can't just tell
on them.Copy !req
209. Why not?Copy !req
210. Because, dude,
we're playing detectives.Copy !req
211. Detectives don't just go tell
on people.Copy !req
212. H-Hey, detectives.Copy !req
213. Huh huh, if you
don't get out of here,Copy !req
214. we're gonna rip
the doll's head off.Copy !req
215. Huh huh huh.Copy !req
216. Huh huh. Yeah.Copy !req
217. We were playing gynecologist,
and now we're playing criminals.Copy !req
218. Huh huh. Yeah.
That's gay.Copy !req
219. Huh huh.
We're gay.Copy !req
220. Jesus. They're gonna kill her.
- We've got to do something.Copy !req
221. Time.
Time is what we need.Copy !req
222. But time is something
we ain't got!Copy !req
223. Attention!
You in the house!Copy !req
224. This is Agent Tucker
with the FBI.Copy !req
225. We have you surrounded —
sort of.Copy !req
226. Hey, you buttholes
can't play FBI here.Copy !req
227. Yeah.
This was our hot lead.Copy !req
228. And you did a great job
leading us here.Copy !req
229. Now you just stay out
of our way.Copy !req
230. The gig is up, Fosse.Copy !req
231. Bring out the doll
or we'll tell on you.Copy !req
232. We're going to charge
the front door and go get it.Copy !req
233. No, you're not.Copy !req
234. Damn it, man, this is not
the time for negotiations!Copy !req
235. There's a little doll about to
have her head twisted off!Copy !req
236. Climb off, kid.Copy !req
237. We say you can't charge
the front door,Copy !req
238. and you have to obey
what the FBI says.Copy !req
239. That's the rules.Copy !req
240. Just because your parents
can afford better toys than oursCopy !req
241. doesn't make you better than us.Copy !req
242. Yes, it does so.Copy !req
243. Mrph rmh rmphm?Copy !req
244. We go get the doll ourselves.Copy !req
245. But they said we can't charge
the front door.Copy !req
246. That's right.Copy !req
247. But they didn't say anything
about going in the back.Copy !req
248. Come on, guys.Copy !req
249. You don't want to hurt
that doll.Copy !req
250. Huh huh. Oh, crap.
They're coming in the back.Copy !req
251. Mrph. Mrph.Copy !req
252. Huh huh.Copy !req
253. Huh huh.
That's gay.Copy !req
254. Bang! Bang! Bang!
I got you, Fosse.Copy !req
255. Huh. No, you didn't.
- Did so!Copy !req
256. No, 'cause I got
special wizard armor on.Copy !req
257. We're not playing
Dungeons and Dragons, ass face!Copy !req
258. All right. That does it.Copy !req
259. Cover me.
I'm going slo-mo.Copy !req
260. Oh. He got me.Copy !req
261. Bleah. Huh.Copy !req
262. Bleah. Bleah.Copy !req
263. Huh huh.
Yeah.Copy !req
264. Ohh, ugh.
Ohh, ugh.Copy !req
265. Huh huh.
We're dead.Copy !req
266. Huh huh.
That's gay.Copy !req
267. We got it.Copy !req
268. Ms. Peterson,
is your daughter home?Copy !req
269. My dolly!Copy !req
270. We got her back safe. We lost a
lot of good men in the process.Copy !req
271. Well, you boys are
little heroes.Copy !req
272. I'm gonna call
the police departmentCopy !req
273. and let them know what brave
little detectives you are.Copy !req
274. Hello, there,
little crime stoppers.Copy !req
275. I'm Lieutenant Dawson
with the Park County police.Copy !req
276. I heard you did a great jobCopy !req
277. finding little Sarah Peterson's
doll.Copy !req
278. We do what we can, sir.Copy !req
279. Well, that's fantastic, kids.Copy !req
280. And for all your
terrific sleuth-solving,Copy !req
281. I'm hereby making you all
Junior Detectives.Copy !req
282. Wow.Copy !req
283. Awesome.
- Sweet.Copy !req
284. That means you boys are now an
official part of the department.Copy !req
285. Cool!Copy !req
286. All right. So, ready
for your first assignment?Copy !req
287. Sure.
- Okay.Copy !req
288. There's a meth lab
down at 567 Mala Vista.Copy !req
289. The operators are probably armed
to the hiltCopy !req
290. with illegal weapons.Copy !req
291. I want you to get down there
and see what you can find.Copy !req
292. Uh... a-a meth lab?Copy !req
293. I don't want any problems.
Just take 'em down by the books.Copy !req
294. Now, get over there.Copy !req
295. The mayor's all over my ass
on this one.Copy !req
296. Oh, and, deputies,
you screw this up,Copy !req
297. and I'll have you working
graveyard shift behind a desk.Copy !req
298. Move it!Copy !req
299. What is a meth lab, anyway?Copy !req
300. I don't know.
Let's just hurry up.Copy !req
301. I want to get home in time
to watch Crime Drama.Copy !req
302. Uh, police.
Open up.Copy !req
303. Oh, crap. Did you guys do
your math homework?Copy !req
304. Oh, dude.
I totally spaced it.Copy !req
305. You die, pigs!Copy !req
306. You want to die, huh?Copy !req
307. You won't take us alive!Copy !req
308. So long, coppers.Copy !req
309. Oh, shit!Copy !req
310. Damn.Copy !req
311. One UPS vehicle
valued at $25,000,Copy !req
312. one civilian vehicle
worth $16,000,Copy !req
313. the second floor
of the post office,Copy !req
314. and a coffee shop
valued at $60,000.Copy !req
315. The mayor's gonna have my ass!Copy !req
316. Uh, sir, we just got
kind of blindsided by the —Copy !req
317. You got careless!Copy !req
318. Now, I don't know
how they do thingsCopy !req
319. down at that dog-and-pony show
they call the fourth grade,Copy !req
320. but here we have rules.Copy !req
321. Jesus, we don't even have guys
to question nowCopy !req
322. because you killed them all!Copy !req
323. We're sorry.Copy !req
324. One more slipup like that,
and I'll have your badges.Copy !req
325. You hear me?
Now, hit the showers.Copy !req
326. Well, well, well.
If it isn't the super cops.Copy !req
327. Hey, Murphy, think they'll
let me borrow their G.I. Joes?Copy !req
328. Come on, you guys.
Leave 'em alone.Copy !req
329. Relax, Hopkins.
All fun and games, right?Copy !req
330. So, tell us, rookies,Copy !req
331. you, uh, find yourself
a little bonus in that house?Copy !req
332. A bonus?Copy !req
333. Come on. We all skim a little
off the top.Copy !req
334. Oh.
Or are you too good for that?Copy !req
335. You think you're
gonna waltz in hereCopy !req
336. and clean up the system,
is that it?Copy !req
337. We just want to be
Junior Detectives.Copy !req
338. Look, we all work hard.Copy !req
339. And we deserve more than
the $30,000 a year we get paid.Copy !req
340. So what if we take in
a little on the side?Copy !req
341. Yeah. Who the hell are you
to change that?Copy !req
342. I said back off, Murphy.Copy !req
343. Why don't you and your
rookie friends make us?Copy !req
344. That's right! Come on!
- Yeah, that's right.Copy !req
345. Bring it!
- Let's go. Come on! Bring it!Copy !req
346. What the hell
is the problem here?Copy !req
347. No problem, sir.Copy !req
348. No problem at all.Copy !req
349. Then hit the showers,
all of you.Copy !req
350. Dude, I don't want to
play detective anymore.Copy !req
351. Me neither.
- It'll get better, you guys.Copy !req
352. Better how, dude?Copy !req
353. Look, we wanted to form a club
to protect and serve South Park.Copy !req
354. We put all this time into it.Copy !req
355. What do you guys want to do,
huh?Copy !req
356. Go back to playing car mechanics
or laundromat owners?Copy !req
357. We were happy playing
laundromat owners.Copy !req
358. I wasn't.Copy !req
359. We started playing detectiveCopy !req
360. because we wanted our playtime
to mean something.Copy !req
361. Or have you forgotten
why you joined the force?Copy !req
362. Hey, Broflovski's a good cop.Copy !req
363. You guys can go back to playing
laundromat owners if you want,Copy !req
364. but I'm not gonna give
those kids playing the FBICopy !req
365. a chance to laugh at us.Copy !req
366. I'll see you guys at school
tomorrow.Copy !req
367. Eric, where have you been?
It's 10:30.Copy !req
368. We had to take down a meth lab
on Mala Vista.Copy !req
369. Well, you should have
called Mommy.Copy !req
370. Will you get off my back?Copy !req
371. It's hard enough
I got to work the beat.Copy !req
372. Then I got to come home
to your nagging?Copy !req
373. Look. Look. I-I'm sorry.Copy !req
374. It's just this case and
the guys down at the station —Copy !req
375. I'm tired, all right?
I'm tired.Copy !req
376. Well, why don't you get ready
for snoogums' night-night,Copy !req
377. and I'll bring you some
toasty chocolate nummers?Copy !req
378. Okay.Copy !req
379. Oh! Ow.Copy !req
380. - Butters?
- Yes?Copy !req
381. Are you still trying to give
a semen sample?Copy !req
382. I'm trying,
but nothing's coming out.Copy !req
383. Well, keep trying, Butters.Copy !req
384. Okay.Copy !req
385. Ow.
Ow!Copy !req
386. And so you can see, children,Copy !req
387. that the women's movement
of the late '50s and early '60sCopy !req
388. had a profound effect on
feminism in America — Uh, boys?Copy !req
389. Would it trouble you terribly
not to sleep in my class?Copy !req
390. Oh, we weren't sleeping,
Mr. Garrison.Copy !req
391. Oh, well, then maybe you can
tell me who was in chargeCopy !req
392. of the feminist movement
of the early '60s.Copy !req
393. A bunch of fat old skanks
on their periods?Copy !req
394. Right, but who was the fattest,
oldest skank on her period?Copy !req
395. That's what I thought.
Now, pay attention!Copy !req
396. Okay, children,
now the biggest skank of allCopy !req
397. was an old fat ass
by the name of —Copy !req
398. Marsh! Broflovski!
McCormick! Cartman!Copy !req
399. In my office!Copy !req
400. Looks like that meth lab
you took downCopy !req
401. was just the tip of the iceberg.Copy !req
402. They found a paper trail
leading all the wayCopy !req
403. to the biggest crime syndicate
in Colorado.Copy !req
404. Uh-oh.Copy !req
405. The operators apparently
run their businessCopy !req
406. out of a sleazy strip joint
down in Englewood.Copy !req
407. They're all cop killers, so I'm
sending you in undercover.Copy !req
408. Uh, sir, I have a lot
of homework to do tonight,Copy !req
409. and I was —
- What?Copy !req
410. Now, you listen to me.Copy !req
411. I'm giving you one last chance.Copy !req
412. You're good cops, but you let
your emotions get in the way.Copy !req
413. And your little shoot-first,
ask-questions-later techniqueCopy !req
414. has no place in this century!Copy !req
415. Now, you get down
to that strip joint,Copy !req
416. and you do it by the books,
you got it?Copy !req
417. The mayor is — my ass —
Blah blah blah!Copy !req
418. So, what did you boys
have to say to the lieutenant?Copy !req
419. Nothing. He just told us
a bunch of stuff.Copy !req
420. Maybe you decided you needed to
tell him about our...Copy !req
421. bonus money.Copy !req
422. No.Copy !req
423. They're lying.Copy !req
424. They're dead.Copy !req
425. Dude, if my mom
knew I was in here,Copy !req
426. I would be in super-big trouble.Copy !req
427. Mrph rmh!Copy !req
428. Would you like a dance?Copy !req
429. No, thanks.Copy !req
430. Dance?
Anyone like a dance?Copy !req
431. All right, guys.
put your hands together.Copy !req
432. Be sure to tip the dancers.Copy !req
433. All right.
Now let's hear it for Candy.Copy !req
434. Whoa. Whoa. What the hell
are you kids doing in here?Copy !req
435. This isn't an appropriate place
for children.Copy !req
436. Dance?Copy !req
437. Anyone like a dance?Copy !req
438. Uh, it's okay.
We know the owner.Copy !req
439. Oh, really?
Let's go see.Copy !req
440. We'll have to start having the
McCormicks make our meth again.Copy !req
441. Hey, Gino, these kids
say they know you.Copy !req
442. What?
I don't know no kids.Copy !req
443. I didn't think so.
All right, you kids.Copy !req
444. Hey, wait a minute.Copy !req
445. These kids might be
just what we needCopy !req
446. to get our drugs past
the security at D.I.A.Copy !req
447. how would you like to join
our family?Copy !req
448. Yo, Gino, I know I seen
these kids before, man.Copy !req
449. These kids are five-o.
- What?Copy !req
450. These kids are cops, man!Copy !req
451. Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!Copy !req
452. Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!
- Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!Copy !req
453. Mrph rmh.
Mrph rmh.Copy !req
454. Kenny, it doesn't go
"peekew-peekew."Copy !req
455. It goes "Bang! Bang! Bang!"Copy !req
456. God damn it!Copy !req
457. Those Junior Detectives and
their heroically reckless ways.Copy !req
458. Murphy, Jenkins, Hopkins,
get in there!Copy !req
459. Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!
Bang! Bang!Copy !req
460. Da-a-a-nce?
Anybody like a da-a-a-a-nce?Copy !req
461. Freeze!
South Park detectives!Copy !req
462. Great job, boys.
You found the meth boss.Copy !req
463. Detective Murphy. Jenkins.
What the hell are you doing?Copy !req
464. We had a deal!Copy !req
465. A deal?Copy !req
466. That's right. We're partners
in the drug business.Copy !req
467. Everything was fine until these
super cops joined the force.Copy !req
468. Now we got to kill you all.Copy !req
469. Boys! Down!Copy !req
470. All right, guys.
Put your hands together.Copy !req
471. Lot of shootin'
and killin' going on.Copy !req
472. But be sure to tip
your waitress.Copy !req
473. Let's hear it for Rebecca.Copy !req
474. Christ! Those Junior Detectives
have no regard for the law.Copy !req
475. Get me a hard line to the phone.
And I want choppers on the roof!Copy !req
476. Who the hell are you?Copy !req
477. Agent Fields, FBI.Copy !req
478. Hey, I'm in charge
of this investigation.Copy !req
479. Not anymore you're not.Copy !req
480. But that's not fair!Copy !req
481. Is so!
Is so!Copy !req
482. Aah!Copy !req
483. Sorry, Detective Hopkins.Copy !req
484. We can't let anybody know
about our partnership.Copy !req
485. That's right.
We split it all, 50-50!Copy !req
486. That's right.Copy !req
487. I think we'll take 100% now.Copy !req
488. Huh huh. Yeah.Copy !req
489. Sorry, Gino,
but in business like this,Copy !req
490. sometimes partnerships
need to end.Copy !req
491. That's right.Copy !req
492. Sometimes partnerships
need to end.Copy !req
493. Well, super cops,Copy !req
494. looks like I'll be taking in
all the money now.Copy !req
495. I'm in business alone.Copy !req
496. And that means that the only
person that I can't trust...Copy !req
497. is myself.Copy !req
498. Looks like Murphy and Jenkins
got what they deserved.Copy !req
499. If it weren't for you boys,Copy !req
500. we would've never cleaned up
the department.Copy !req
501. All right, detectives.
Let's get one thing straight.Copy !req
502. I do not agree
with your methods.Copy !req
503. You're uncontrolled
and you're negligent!Copy !req
504. But, by God,
you get the job done.Copy !req
505. Congratulations.Copy !req
506. Thanks.Copy !req
507. I'm probably gonna regret this,
but, well,Copy !req
508. I'm promoting you
to full detectives.Copy !req
509. There'll be lots more actionCopy !req
510. and that big paycheck
you've always wanted.Copy !req
511. I think I have a better idea.Copy !req
512. Hello, sir. Welcome to
the Broflovski Laundromat.Copy !req
513. Yes. I have a suit I need
dry-cleaned and pressed, please.Copy !req
514. Certainly.Copy !req
515. Here you are, Mr. McCormick.Copy !req
516. Your laundry is all done
and folded.Copy !req
517. That will be $9.95.Copy !req
518. On your American Express.Copy !req
519. Fellas! Hey, fellas!
I got it!Copy !req
520. - I-I got my semen sample!
- You did?Copy !req
521. Yeah. I was up there pounding
my wiener for two days straight.Copy !req
522. A-And finally I thought about
Stan's mom's boobs,Copy !req
523. and this little tiny spooge
of this white stuff came out.Copy !req
524. That's great, but we're not
playing detective anymore.Copy !req
525. We're playing laundromat owners.Copy !req
526. Would you like those
pants cleaned for $4.95?Copy !req