1. Ooh, hello boys.
Copy !req
2. Hi, the school
called and said
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3. We all have to start
going to class again.
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4. Ooh, but I thought
your teacher died.
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5. She did, but now
they're saying
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6. We have to start
going back to school anyways.
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7. It's totally gay.
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8. Oh, well,
I'll tell eric
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9. He's just down in the basement
playing with his dolls.
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10. Cartman likes
to play with dolls?
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11. Hello, precious.
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12. Yes, that's
a good precious.
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13. Now it takes the lotion
from the basket...
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14. Oh please, mister,
please let me out of here!
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15. It puts the lotion
on its skin
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16. Or else it gets
the hose again!
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17. Bark bark bark!
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18. Yes, that's
a good precious...
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19. Okay, now it puts the lotion
back in the basket.
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20. Please, mister,
let me out!
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21. It puts the lotion
back in the basket-
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22. I miss my mom, mister,
I want to see my mommy!
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23. Put the lotion in the
f- King basket!
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24. Sweetie-
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25. Yes, mom?
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26. You have to get
ready for school.
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27. No, our teacher's dead,
remember?
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28. Yes, but they said
two weeks off was enough
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29. And they want
everyone back.
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30. Two weeks isn't enough.
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31. I'm not over our teacher's
tragic death.
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32. I'm still shook up.
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33. You'll get
over it, honey.
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34. But I wanna playyyyyy.
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35. I can't believe
it's been 2 weeks
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36. Since I've
seen you guys!
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37. What have you
been doing?
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38. Hey, guys!
Hey, bebe!
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39. You guys uh, notice
anything different?
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40. Oh my god, bebe
you got boobs!
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41. Yeah, they started
coming in last week!
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42. At first I thought they
were just mosquito bites
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43. But then they
didn't go away!
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44. M'kay, kids, let's take our
seats, please, m'kay.
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45. I know this has been a difficult
couple weeks for you all
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46. With the untimely death
of your teacher
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47. But it's time for us to try
and move on and learn, m'kay?
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48. Mr. Mackey, I don't
think I'm over
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49. The teacher's tragic death yet,
I need more time.
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50. It just... it
still hurts, y'know?
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51. Can I go home?
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52. No, eric, what
we're going to do
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53. Is learn to hide our emotions
with math problems.
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54. So let's start with some
multiplication tables...
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55. Dude, look at bebe...
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56. Something seems
different about her.
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57. Yeah, I noticed that too.
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58. Did she get a haircut
or something?
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59. I don't know...
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60. Hey, token, I never
really noticed before
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61. But that girl bebe
is really kind of cool.
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62. I was just thinking
the same thing.
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63. It's like she's a girl
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64. But she's someone
you could hang out with.
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65. Yeah, bebe is
kind of cool, huh?
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66. Hey, craig, is that
the same shirt
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67. That bebe chick
always wears?
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68. I don't know, why?
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69. It just seems like
a really awesome shirt.
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70. Yeah, it kind of does.
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71. M'kay, so who can tell me the
answer to the first problem,
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72. "Six times eight".
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73. Bebe?
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74. Oh, uh...
forty eight?
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75. Whoa! Whoa!
Whoa!
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76. That is an
awesome answer!
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77. Yeah!
Yeah! Yeah!
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78. Dude, bebe is
really smart.
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79. Yeah, I never
noticed that before.
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80. Maybe she's actually
cool enough
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81. To hang out with us.
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82. Yeah, maybe!
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83. But I was like-
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84. "I'm not buying those shoes
for twenty dollars!"
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85. Uh... hey, bebe.
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86. Yeah?
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87. Uh... we're gonna go
throw rocks at cars later on,
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88. And we thought maybe
you'd like to join us.
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89. Really, I've never
done that before.
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90. It's really fun!
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91. You toss these
little rocks at cars,
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92. And if the driver
gets angry, you blame me!
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93. Yeah, it's cool.
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94. Well sure, that
sounds hella fun.
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95. Ha, ha! Yeah! She's right! Hella-Fun!
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96. "Hella-Fun"
that's awesome.
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97. I'm gonna start
saying that now!
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98. Cool, we'll
see you later, bebe.
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99. Stan, you've
never asked me
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100. To throw rocks at cars
with you guys.
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101. That's different, dude,
you're like my girlfriend.
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102. Bebe's just- I dunno
she's just... cool.
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103. Yeah, she's really cool.
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104. It's weird how we
never noticed before.
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105. So what you do, see, is
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106. You wait for a car to
drive by that big pine tree,
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107. Then you chuck
a rock at it.
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108. It's all about
the timing...
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109. You damn kids!
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110. Cool!
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111. You try it, bebe!
Okay!
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112. Here comes a sedan!
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113. You damn kids!
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114. Sweet! Cool!
Awesome!
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115. Wow, that was the most perfect
throw I've ever seen!
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116. That was sweet, bebe!
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117. Now if you just hold
the rock like this-
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118. Yeah, here, it's like,
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119. If you put your thumb
on this side-
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120. I'm showing her.
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121. Yeah, just let me show her
real quick how to put the thumb-
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122. Anyways, you put a spin
on it by holding it here-
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123. Yeah, and then you can
actually hold it like this-
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124. Listen, guys, uh,
it's five-Thirty.
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125. I'm supposed to get home.
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126. So... I'll see you later.
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127. Wait- What were
we doing again?
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128. We were throwing
rocks at cars.
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129. Right.Rocks.
Oh yeah.
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130. Here comes a suv!
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131. You damn kids!
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132. Hi, bebe!
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133. Hey, everybody!
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134. Oh for christ's sake!
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135. M'kay, kids, yesterday
I asked you to write a paper
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136. To read aloud
for the class.
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137. Now who wants to start?
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138. M'kay, clyde.
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139. My paper is called,
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140. "Why bebe is the
coolest person ever."
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141. Hey, that's what
I wrote about!
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142. Me too!
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143. Umm'k,
go ahead, clyde.
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144. My friend bebe
is really smart.
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145. She tells funny jokes
and knows a lot about stuff.
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146. She's good at almost
everything she tries.
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147. She's awesome, the end.
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148. M'kay,
very nice, clyde.
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149. Uh, token, why don't you
read your paper.
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150. "If I could be bebe"
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151. If I was bebe I would have
lots of friends
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152. Because I would
be so great.
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153. I would make people smile
and think wherever I went.
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154. M'kay, interesting, token.
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155. Who would like to go next?
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156. Uh, how about someone who didn't
write about how cool bebe is?
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157. M'kay, bebe.
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158. "My cat thumper"
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159. Wow!
Wow! Wow!
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160. Thumper is grey
with a white spot.
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161. Sometimes, he likes to
chase his tail.
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162. Chase his tail!
That must be so funny!
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163. Thumper is
12 years old.
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164. That's pretty old
for a cat.
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165. The end.
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166. Wow!
Wow! Wow!
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167. God, you know,
that's so true,
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168. Because you sometimes
never really think about
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169. How old a pet is,
until it's gone.
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170. That's true, huh?
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171. Man, that really makes me
reflect on my pets.
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172. That's such
a great paper.
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173. M'kay, wendy, why don't
we hear your paper?
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174. "The new cold war"-
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175. Oh god, here
we go again.
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176. Dork alert!
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177. But then the mall closes
at four or five o'clock so-
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178. Hey, have you dumb girls
seen bebe anywhere?
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179. No!
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180. Maybe she's in
the lunch line.
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181. Yeah!
Yeah!
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182. Can you believe bebe? She thinks
she so cool all of a sudden!
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183. I can't stand her anymore,
she's such a slut.
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184. She's a total slut!
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185. You know what I heard?
I heard that she made out
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186. With eight different boys
in one minute!
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187. I heard that she
lifted her shirt
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188. To the boys
at the bus stop.
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189. I heard that her asshole
is like this big around.
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190. Whoa!
Whoa!
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191. Hey, guys.
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192. Oh, hey, bebe-
Slut.
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193. Slut! Slut! Slut!
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194. You guys still wanna go
ice skating after school?
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195. No, that's okay, bebe.
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196. You might trip and then
we'd be sucked into
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197. Your huge, gaping vagina like
ants into a vacuum cleaner.
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198. Slut!
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199. Slut!
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200. Slut!
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201. Slut!
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202. Bebe, is something
the matter?
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203. Oh mom... it's just...
my girlfriends at school
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204. Said some really mean
things to me today.
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205. They called me a slut
with a huge, gaping vagina.
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206. Oh, sweetie, you're
all just growing up.
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207. Part of being a woman
is having a friend one day,
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208. And calling her
a slut the next.
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209. But am I slutty
just because
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210. I'm starting to be
friends with guys?
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211. They just like me because
they think I'm smart and cool.
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212. I remember when
I was a little girl,
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213. The boys didn't think
I was very smart at all.
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214. But then, one day-
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215. They all started thinking
I was really smart.
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216. I guess big smarts
just run in our family.
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217. Well if the girls don't want to
be my friends, that's fine.
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218. Guys are way
cooler anyways.
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219. You guys wanted me
to meet you here?
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220. Yeah, have a seat, tweek,
we all need to have a talk.
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221. Oh god!
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222. Alright, guys, now that
we're all here
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223. I think that we need to have
a difficult conversation.
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224. It's obvious that bebe is
like the coolest, smartest,
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225. Most awesome person
we've ever met.
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226. True.
Yup.
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227. And, y'know we've been
trying to fill the gap
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228. With a fourth friend
ever since kenny died,
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229. God rest his soul...
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230. And it hasn't been
an easy process.
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231. Right...
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232. And so, even though I think it's
a tough thing to do right now...
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233. I think maybe it's best
for everyone if we make room
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234. To allow bebe to be
our new fourth friend.
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235. Yeah, that
would be best.
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236. Well, I'm glad
you guys all agree.
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237. And so, kyle,
I just want to say that
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238. It's been really great,
and we're going to miss you.
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239. Huh?
Kyle?
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240. And even though
it didn't quite work out,
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241. I'm sure you'll find other
friends the down the road, kyle.
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242. Here's a nice watch for you
and some peanuts.
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243. Me?
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244. Dude, I've been here
since the beginning!
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245. And we're really
sad to see you go.
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246. Let's give a big round of
applause for kyle, everybody.
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247. Hip, hip!
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248. Dude, we're not
kicking kyle out!
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249. Pleeeeeaaaaaaase?
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250. No!
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251. Alright, fine!
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252. Then I guess
we have no choice
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253. But to let
you go, tweek.
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254. But we want you to know
that it's been really fun.
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255. Here's a watch
and some peanuts.
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256. No way, tweek's cool! Yeah!
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257. Well dumbasses, how are
we gonna make room for bebe?
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258. Thanks for inviting me to ride
the bus to school with you guys.
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259. Sure thing, bebe.
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260. That's fine!
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261. That's fine!
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262. F- K you, kyle!
F- K you, stan!
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263. F- K you, tweek!
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264. Bebe, you're still cool.
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265. What are you doing?
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266. We're trying to get bebe
to run for class president!
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267. I'm class president!
The vote was last fall!
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268. Well, yeah, but, wendy,
you have to admit
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269. Bebe is a lot smarter and
more organized than you.
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270. Yeah, we need
a leader like bebe.
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271. She can teach us
all so much.
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272. Uh-Huh...
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273. She's not smarter
and cooler than everyone!
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274. You guys are just drawn
to something else!
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275. What?
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276. My god, you guys
are so stupid!
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277. Stupider
than bebe!
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278. Yeah! Yeah!
Yeah!
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279. Bebe's cool,
huh, fellas?
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280. Yup! Yeah!
She sure is.
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281. I can't wait to watch
terrance and phillip with bebe!
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282. Yeah!
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283. Where are
you guys going?
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284. We're going to see
our friend bebe.
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285. Bebe is our friend.
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286. Didn't you all
get the memo?
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287. Bebe is everybody's friend.
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288. Yeah, god put bebe on earth
to enrich everyone's lives!
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289. Alright, I guess
we can all watch
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290. Terrance and phillip together.
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291. Oh hello, boys.
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292. Is bebe home?
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293. No, she's with
one of her little friends.
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294. But she should be back shortly
if you boys want to wait.
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295. Who is she with?
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296. I believe
she's playing "lambs"
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297. Over at eric cartman's house.
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298. Cartman's?
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299. See, and
this is precious!
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300. Precious?
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301. Bark! Bark! Bark!
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302. Okay, so then we put
my mom's hand lotion
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303. In this little basket
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304. And lower it down
to polly prissypants.
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305. Uh-Huh...
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306. Now you say- "It puts the
lotion on its skin
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307. Or else it gets
the hose again."
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308. It... puts the
lotion on its skin
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309. Or else it gets
the hose again.
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310. Huh-Huh, yeah!
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311. Mister, please
let me out of here!
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312. Now say it
again, louder!
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313. It puts the lotion
on its skin
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314. Or else it gets
the hose again.
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315. Good, now put the
lotion back in the basket.
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316. My parents have
money, mister!
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317. They'll give you
whatever you want!
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318. Please!
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319. Now just yell, "put the
lotion in the f-King basket!"
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320. Put the lotion
in the basket!
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321. Put the lotion
in the f-King basket!
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322. Oh no,
precious!
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323. I got your dog mister,
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324. Let me out or
I'm gonna kill it!
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325. You say- "Don't you
hurt my f-King dog"!
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326. Don't you hurt
my f-King dog!
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327. You bitch, I'll
cut your throat-
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328. What the hell
are you doing?
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329. We're playing lambs.
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330. Bebe, I thought we were gonna
watch terrance and phillip today.
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331. Yeah, and then we gotta
work on your campaign!
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332. Right, but first
we have to go to-
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333. You guys, calm down!
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334. This is insane!
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335. Stop it, you guys,
please!
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336. Oh boy, I never meant
to cause all this trouble!
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337. Arhhh! Ahrrrh!
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338. Bebe... those boys
from your school
Copy !req
339. Are still waiting outside
to see if you'll come out.
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340. I know, they've
been there all day.
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341. Looks like my little girl has
a lot of gentlemen callers!
Copy !req
342. Mom, why is everyone acting
so different around me?
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343. Sweetie- You're just
blossoming into a woman.
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344. But... I don't know
if I want to.
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345. Sometimes I think that I'm not
as smart and cool as they say.
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346. That everyone just tells me
I am because of my hooters.
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347. Sweetie,
you're a stevens.
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348. And stevens women
are always told
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349. They're really,
really smart!
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350. Mom, what's
six times eight?
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351. Oh sweetie... those are two
completely different numbers.
Copy !req
352. Alright, boys,
time to be getting home.
Copy !req
353. Bebe's not feeling well,
and she can't come out today.
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354. Go on- Shoo!
Copy !req
355. Oh whew,
we made it!
Copy !req
356. Boys, can you
call 911 for us?
Copy !req
357. Oh my god!
Copy !req
358. We've landed on earth
thousands of years in the future
Copy !req
359. And apes have taken over!
Copy !req
360. I knew it
- You blew it up, didn't you?
Copy !req
361. I don't want to live
in this futuristic madness!
Copy !req
362. Take your ape world
and go to hell!
Copy !req
363. Having boobs sucks.
Copy !req
364. Well, hello there,
little girl,
Copy !req
365. My name is doctor hallis,
Copy !req
366. What can I
do for you today?
Copy !req
367. I want to have
breast reduction surgery.
Copy !req
368. You?
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369. Yes, I have
$212 in nickels
Copy !req
370. And a gold bracelet.
Copy !req
371. Well, young lady,
I'm afraid that we don't
Copy !req
372. Offer breast reduction surgery
to girls of your age.
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373. Why not?
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374. Britney spears got fake ones
when she was a teenager,
Copy !req
375. Why can't I have
mine taken off?
Copy !req
376. Because making breasts larger
Copy !req
377. Is a beautiful
and wonderful thing.
Copy !req
378. Making them smaller is...
insane.
Copy !req
379. I think it's insane
to want them bigger!
Copy !req
380. Why do you
hate your breasts so?
Copy !req
381. Ever since I got
these stupid things
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382. Everyone treats
me differently!
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383. I feel like I might be
treated differently
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384. The rest of my life!
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385. Oh come on now,
that's just silly.
Copy !req
386. Here's the
anderson file, doctor.
Copy !req
387. Oh awesome, thank you so much,
jilian that's great.
Copy !req
388. Ooh god damn,
thank you so much...
Copy !req
389. And here's the coffee
you wanted, doctor.
Copy !req
390. Yeah, whatever,
get out of here.
Copy !req
391. Now, I was saying?
Copy !req
392. Please, you
have to help me!
Copy !req
393. I think that if my breasts
keep growing this way,
Copy !req
394. Boys will give me
whatever I want!
Copy !req
395. Yeah, so,
that's great, isn't it?
Copy !req
396. No, it's not!
Copy !req
397. Because if I grow up
getting everything I want-
Copy !req
398. Having things made easy for me
because I have hot knockers
Copy !req
399. Then I'm going to grow up
to be a lame person.
Copy !req
400. If I'm handed
everything in life
Copy !req
401. Then my chances
of becoming a lawyer
Copy !req
402. Or a marine biologist
are zero!
Copy !req
403. That may be true,
but I'm afraid I just cannot
Copy !req
404. Ethically perform
a breast reduction surgery
Copy !req
405. On an eight-Year-Old girl!
Copy !req
406. Dammit!
Copy !req
407. If, on the other hand
Copy !req
408. You'd like to make them
a little bigger,
Copy !req
409. I think now might be
the right time to size up, mmm?
Copy !req
410. Oh, f-K off!
Copy !req
411. Randy, could you have
a talk with stanly?
Copy !req
412. What's the matter with him?
Copy !req
413. It's just that...
Copy !req
414. Well, he's been acting
a little different.
Copy !req
415. Ahhh-Tah, ahhhh-Tah.
Copy !req
416. He's been ignoring his homework
and all his friends.
Copy !req
417. I can't figure out why.
Copy !req
418. Atahhh...
Copy !req
419. Oh boy, it looks like he's
starting to notice breasts.
Copy !req
420. Oh yes, our little stanly
is starting to become a man.
Copy !req
421. Atahh, ohhhhh,
ahhhtahhh!
Copy !req
422. Hey there, son.
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423. Wah!
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424. Ahh-Tah... ah-Tahh...
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425. Yes, ah-Tahh.
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426. Let's have a talk, stan.
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427. Tah-Halk!
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428. Stan, as you get older,
boobs- These atahh-
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429. Will start becoming
a major part of your life.
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430. But stanly, you can't let them
get in the way of your friends.
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431. There are lots of
boobs out there, son.
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432. But they're just boobs.
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433. Your friends are forever.
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434. Friends... atahh...
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435. I know you think this set
of boobs is important now,
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436. But those boobs will be replaced
by another set of boobs.
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437. Boobs will come and go.
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438. And then someday, you'll
meet a pair of boobs
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439. That you want to marry.
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440. And those become the boobs
that matter the most.
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441. I love you.
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442. If you can just
understand that, stanly
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443. You'll see that boobs
hold no real power at all.
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444. The boys are at war.
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445. All is going
as planned.
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446. Yessss... soon
all the boys
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447. Will be brought
to their knees.
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448. We grow larger
every day...
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449. And stronger...
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450. Soon, the
entire town-
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451. Shh, shh,
she's awake!
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452. Oh, quiet!
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453. Aaaghhaghgh!
Mom, mommmmmmm!
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454. What is it, bebe?
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455. My breasts!
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456. Oh sweetheart, you're
just becoming a young lady.
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457. No, they're conspiring!
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458. Mom, they were talking,
they want to destroy the town!
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459. Yes, darling, your
breasts have a power
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460. That will unleash
itself as you get older.
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461. They feed off
the misery of boys,
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462. And grow to bring woe
wherever they can.
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463. You're blossoming
into a woman.
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464. That does it!
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465. I'm not letting
these things run my life!
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466. Young lady, are you
absolutely sure
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467. You want to consider this kind
of procedure for your breasts?
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468. Yes, I want to get
breast implants.
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469. I tried to tell her
she was too young.
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470. Well, it is a different time,
mrs. Testaburger.
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471. Society puts a lot of
pressure on your daughter
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472. To look her best.
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473. Having small breasts can
make her feel unimportant.
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474. But she's eight!
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475. Yes, well, not too
young to feel flat
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476. And therefore not pretty.
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477. That's what I said.
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478. However, young lady,
I'm afraid breast implants
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479. Are not for everyone.
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480. I'll need to
carefully assess
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481. Your physical
and mental condition
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482. To see if augmentation is truly
the best way for you to go.
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483. I have $3,000 cash.
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484. You pass,
let's do this thing.
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485. Ooh, wait- You're
gonna do it right now?
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486. Sure, breast augmentation
is now a very simple procedure.
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487. What we do is make a small
incision in the armpit,
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488. Where it won't be seen.
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489. Then we take this
little plastic bag
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490. And gently place it
in the chest,
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491. Where we fill it
with salt water.
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492. I still don't
know about this.
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493. Look, us plastic surgeons
have one philosophy:
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494. If we can help
someone's self-Esteem
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495. Then why not do it
if they have $3,000.
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496. Just... gotta jam it
up there!
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497. Get-In-There-You-Bitch!
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498. Get-In-There-You-Bitch!
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499. Ahhh, okay, there's one,
wendy, doing great...!
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500. M'kay, kids, we need to
talk about your failing grades.
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501. Bebe... where bebe?
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502. Bebe! Ah-Tah!
Fire bad!
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503. Okay, we all have to start
studying more
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504. And fighting less, m'kay?
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505. Ah-Tah!
Bebe! Fire bad!
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506. Hey, guys.
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507. Hmmm... nnnnnmmm...
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508. Have you guys
noticed that
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509. Bebe isn't as cool
as she used to be?
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510. Yeah, what the hell
happened to us?
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511. Oh my god,
I get it now!
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512. It was bebe's boobs!
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513. Bebe's boobs?
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514. Oh cool, it worked!
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515. Don't you guys see?
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516. Boobs do something
to our brains.
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517. They fill our brains
with illusions.
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518. So, bebe didn't become
smart and cool,
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519. It was just her boobs?
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520. Yes!
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521. So bebe's is actually just
as lame as she ever was?
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522. Right, my boobs just
clouded your judgement.
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523. But that sucks.
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524. I don't want something to have
that much power over me.
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525. I don't think it will
as long as we realize it.
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526. We must learn to control
their power over us.
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527. Yeah, screw boobs,
they're stupid!
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528. I'm sorry for
fighting, you guys.
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529. Dude, sorry.I'm sorry.
Aww.
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530. Oh, that's so sweet.
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531. Let's never let boobs
come between us again!
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532. Here, here!
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533. Boobs are stupid!
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534. Hi, everybody!
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535. Ha ha! Ha ha!
Ha ha!
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536. Look at those
ridiculous things!
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537. Eww... they're all
hard and oogy!
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538. What a stupid bitch!
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539. Ha ha! Ha ha!
Ha ha!
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