1. Wow, what a great episode.Copy !req
2. And what great timing.Copy !req
3. Our Western Idaho
bacon casserole is ready.Copy !req
4. Now, that looks
baconlicious.Copy !req
5. Now all we have to do
is dish it outCopy !req
6. and garnish with
a side of bacon.Copy !req
7. Oh, Macon, feels left out.
He needs some bacon.Copy !req
8. All right.Copy !req
9. Who loves bacon?
Who loves bacon?Copy !req
10. Who loves bacon?Copy !req
11. Who loves bacon?Copy !req
12. Who loves bacon?Copy !req
13. Who loves bacon?
Yeah.Copy !req
14. Now, we can't let all this
bacon grease go to waste.Copy !req
15. So this time, we're going to
pour it into a mold...Copy !req
16. And that makes
a fabulous dessert.Copy !req
17. Well, not it's time
for our favorite episodeCopy !req
18. of "South Park."
It's called "Clubhouses."Copy !req
19. This is about that innocent
time in every kid's lifeCopy !req
20. where they play Truth or Dare
for the first time.Copy !req
21. The first time
I played Truth or DareCopy !req
22. was with my Uncle Steve.Copy !req
23. Well, this episode
is also aboutCopy !req
24. the nasty business of divorceCopy !req
25. Divorce is a terrible thing.Copy !req
26. Both Matt's parents
and my parentsCopy !req
27. are still married,
and that's the main reasonCopy !req
28. we turned out to be
such nice guys.Copy !req
29. Have some more bacon, pig.Copy !req
30. So now we're going to enjoyCopy !req
31. some Western Idaho
bacon casserole,Copy !req
32. and you all enjoy
"Clubhouses."Copy !req
33. Sgt. Stanley Marsh is trapped
behind enemy lines.Copy !req
34. His only chance of survival
is to sneak pastCopy !req
35. the Bosnian guard
who stands watch.Copy !req
36. Sgt. Marsh knows
it's now or never.Copy !req
37. He must make a run for it.Copy !req
38. The American base
is only a few feet away...Copy !req
39. It will take more than
your weakCopy !req
40. American weapons to destroy me.Copy !req
41. Cartman, we shot
your Bosnian fat ass!Copy !req
42. Yeah, you're dead!Copy !req
43. I have class 4 Armour onCopy !req
44. that, uh, it
- No, you don't!Copy !req
45. Special armor
that's impenetrableCopy !req
46. to American bullets.Copy !req
47. Dude, every time we play
Americans vs. Bosnians,Copy !req
48. you cheat!
- Yeah Cartman, you suck.Copy !req
49. If you want to play
Americans vs. Bosnians anymore,Copy !req
50. you can just
play with yourself.Copy !req
51. That's fine,
I like playing with myself.Copy !req
52. I'll play with myself
all day long.Copy !req
53. What?Copy !req
54. Well, now what are
we going to do?Copy !req
55. I don't know.
- Hi, Stan.Copy !req
56. Hi, Wendy.
- Kyle, doesn't BebeCopy !req
57. look pretty today?
- I don't know.Copy !req
58. She does, she looks
very pretty.Copy !req
59. Okay.
- Stan, can I talk to youCopy !req
60. for a second?Copy !req
61. Stan, wouldn't it be fun
if we fixedCopy !req
62. Kyle up with Bebe?
- No.Copy !req
63. If Bebe and Kyle
were a couple, then we couldCopy !req
64. invite them over
to your clubhouse for dinner,Copy !req
65. and play parlor games and
have meaningful conversationsCopy !req
66. and sip cognac
by the fireplace.Copy !req
67. We could?
- Yes, Stan!Copy !req
68. But, dude, I don't
have a clubhouse.Copy !req
69. You don't? I thought
all guys had clubhouses.Copy !req
70. Just how many guys'
clubhouses have you been in?Copy !req
71. Cartman don Cartman has ways
of making you talk.Copy !req
72. Stan, you have to
build a clubhouse,Copy !req
73. then all four of us could
sit in it and playCopy !req
74. "Truth or Dare."Copy !req
75. Truth or Dare, wow!
Come on, Kyle,Copy !req
76. we've got work to do.
We do?Copy !req
77. We're gonna build
a clubhouse.Copy !req
78. I have to ask
my dad for help.Copy !req
79. Did it work?
- I think it did, Bebe.Copy !req
80. If all goes as planned,
Kyle will beCopy !req
81. your new boyfriend!
- I hope so, Wendy.Copy !req
82. He's got such a hot ass!Copy !req
83. Hey, Phillip,
pull my finger.Copy !req
84. All right,
Terrence.Copy !req
85. Oh, wait,
wait, wait, pull harder.Copy !req
86. Well, all right.Copy !req
87. Damn it, pull really
hard, Phillip.Copy !req
88. - Okay.
- Wait.Copy !req
89. Aah!
Oh, boy!Copy !req
90. Wait, wait.Copy !req
91. Got you there.Copy !req
92. Uh, oh.Copy !req
93. Oh, you got me, Terrence.Copy !req
94. Yes, I sure did.Copy !req
95. Whoa, dude,
your dad is watchingCopy !req
96. Terrence and Phillip.
No, I was just, uh,Copy !req
97. flipping through the channels.Copy !req
98. Hey, Dad, we need to
build a clubhouse.Copy !req
99. Okay.
- How do we do it?Copy !req
100. You just get
a hammer and some wood.Copy !req
101. What? Do some girls
want to playCopy !req
102. Truth or Dare or something?Copy !req
103. Yeah, dude! How did you know?
- How do you thinkCopy !req
104. I met your mother?
- Randy, my wedding ring.Copy !req
105. I lost it down
the garbage disposal!Copy !req
106. Oh, brother.Copy !req
107. Stanley, I thought
I told you not to watchCopy !req
108. this horrible cartoon.Copy !req
109. Yeah, Stanley,
you should know better.Copy !req
110. Dude!
- Here, Stanley,Copy !req
111. you watch nice
cartoons like "Fat Abbot".Copy !req
112. Randy, will you pleaseCopy !req
113. come get my wedding ring
out of sink!Copy !req
114. Okay, okay.
Hey, hey, hey,Copy !req
115. what's going on, Rudy?Copy !req
116. Man, Fat Abbot,
you need to lose weight.Copy !req
117. I lose weight when
I feel like it, bitch!Copy !req
118. Shut your
bitchass mouth, ho'!Copy !req
119. Bitch?
I'll kick your ass!Copy !req
120. Whoa dude!
- Sweet!Copy !req
121. You think you're slick,
you punkass,Copy !req
122. blasphemous, dopefiend, bitch.Copy !req
123. I had my jimmy wacked
seven times last week.Copy !req
124. I'll bust a cap
in your.Copy !req
125. Wow, cartoons are
getting really dirty.Copy !req
126. Did you find it?
Give me a second, would you?Copy !req
127. Don't snap at me!
- I didn't snap at you.Copy !req
128. You snapped at me!
- Whatever.Copy !req
129. "Whatever"?
In 15 years, you've never saidCopy !req
130. "whatever" to me.Copy !req
131. I don't want fight,
I'm sorry.Copy !req
132. I'm sorry, too.
I think I found it.Copy !req
133. That's not it, you idiot!
- Hey, back off, bitch!Copy !req
134. You just said the "C" word!
- Did I?Copy !req
135. This is a sweet spot
for a clubhouse.Copy !req
136. Yeah, hey, Stan,
what did your dad meanCopy !req
137. when he said we're gonna
play Truth or Dare?Copy !req
138. Oh, uh, just that maybe
when we're finished,Copy !req
139. Wendy and Bebe can
come over and play.Copy !req
140. Dude, what kind of
sick joke is that?Copy !req
141. Girls suck ass.Copy !req
142. Well, of course,
they do, but, uh...Copy !req
143. wouldn't it be sweet to play
Truth or Dare with them?Copy !req
144. What, why?
Because, dude,Copy !req
145. we could make them do really
gross stuff like eat bugs.Copy !req
146. Hey, yeah,
that would be sweet!Copy !req
147. We could totally
ruin their lives!Copy !req
148. What are you guys doing?Copy !req
149. We're building a clubhouse.Copy !req
150. A clubhouse?Copy !req
151. That's the lamest thing
I've ever heard.Copy !req
152. It's not lame,
it's sweet.Copy !req
153. After we build this clubhouse,
we're going to getCopy !req
154. girls to play Truth or Dare.Copy !req
155. Why?Copy !req
156. Because, dumb-ass,
we can dare them to doCopy !req
157. gross stuff and make them cry.Copy !req
158. What, were you born yesterday?Copy !req
159. Yeah, now beat it, you guys.
This clubhouse is private.Copy !req
160. That's fine.
We'll build our own clubhouse.Copy !req
161. Fine.
Fine, and then we'll getCopy !req
162. girls to play
Truth or Dare, too.Copy !req
163. Fine.
- Fine.Copy !req
164. Fine.Copy !req
165. Fine!
- Fine! That's fine!Copy !req
166. Fine!
- Fine!Copy !req
167. No, Kenny,
you can't look.Copy !req
168. I'm the foreman.Copy !req
169. Because, Kenny,
your family's poor.Copy !req
170. You have to be the worker.Copy !req
171. No, Kenny!Copy !req
172. How's the treehouse
coming along, hon?Copy !req
173. Mom, it's not a treehouse,
it's a clubhouse!Copy !req
174. Sorry, hon.Copy !req
175. Mom, can we pull up
the carpetingCopy !req
176. in the living room?
Well, I don't know, Eric.Copy !req
177. If you did that, then
the floors would be bare.Copy !req
178. But, Mom,
the blueprint saysCopy !req
179. we need carpeting
in the clubhouse!Copy !req
180. Well, all right.Copy !req
181. Kenny, my mom says you can
go get carpetingCopy !req
182. in the living room now.Copy !req
183. And stop your bitchin'!Copy !req
184. What are you
doing, sweetheart?Copy !req
185. Getting a cookie.
We're building a clubhouseCopy !req
186. and then we're—
- You men are all alike.Copy !req
187. First you get a cookie and then
you criticize the way I dressCopy !req
188. and then it's the way I cook.Copy !req
189. I suppose next
you'll be telling meCopy !req
190. that you need your spaceCopy !req
191. and that I'm sabotaging
your creativity.Copy !req
192. Go ahead, Stanley,
get your goddamn cookie!Copy !req
193. 'Kay.Copy !req
194. And so, children,
today we're going to focusCopy !req
195. on American history.
Right, Mr. Twig?Copy !req
196. That's right, Mr. Garrison.
American history is veryCopy !req
197. When is Mr. Hat coming back?
- What did you say?Copy !req
198. When is Mr. Hat coming back?Copy !req
199. I told you to never
to mention that nameCopy !req
200. in my classroom again.Copy !req
201. Mr. Hat is a
two-timing whore,Copy !req
202. and now we all
learn from Mr. Twig!Copy !req
203. - But Mr. Twig sucks.
- Yeah!Copy !req
204. That is enough!
Mr. Hat is goneCopy !req
205. and he isn't coming back!
and I don't want to hear it!Copy !req
206. Anyway, children,
let's turn our historyCopy !req
207. textbooks to page 105,
which would be right after...Copy !req
208. So, how's your lameass
clubhouse, Stan?Copy !req
209. Better than yours, fat boy.
- We'll see about that.Copy !req
210. Don't forget you need to
cut school earlyCopy !req
211. and wait for
the hot tub guy.Copy !req
212. Is the clubhouse ready?
- Almost.Copy !req
213. Stan,
are you paying attention?Copy !req
214. Yes, Mr. Garrison.
- Well then, Stanley,Copy !req
215. what did I just say?Copy !req
216. Um...Copy !req
217. You said that even though
Charo appeared 12 timesCopy !req
218. on "The Love Boat",
the episode withCopy !req
219. "Captain and Tennille"
got higher ratings.Copy !req
220. Well, okay, I suppose
you were paying attention.Copy !req
221. Anyway, children...
- Good guess, dude.Copy !req
222. Phew!Copy !req
223. Psst, pass this up.Copy !req
224. Pass this up.Copy !req
225. Pass this up.Copy !req
226. P-Pass this up.Copy !req
227. Stanley, are you
passing notes to Kyle?Copy !req
228. No, I just
- Don't lie, Stan,Copy !req
229. lying makes you sterile.Copy !req
230. I'm not lying,
someone just handed me—Copy !req
231. Stanley, if you think
it's so importantCopy !req
232. to keep interrupting
my class,Copy !req
233. then why don't you
come up to the frontCopy !req
234. and read your note to Kyle
for everyone to hear?Copy !req
235. But I didn't
write the note.Copy !req
236. Mr. Garrison,
Stan's behavior is havingCopy !req
237. an adverse affect
on my education.Copy !req
238. Shut up, Cartman!
- Stanley Marsh,Copy !req
239. you come up here right now
and read your note!Copy !req
240. Oh, man!Copy !req
241. "Dear Kyle, you have got
such a great ass.Copy !req
242. "I could sleep for days
on those perky cheeks,Copy !req
243. "let me tell you.
I'd like to live with youCopy !req
244. and wear your ass
as a hat for all eternity."Copy !req
245. Whoa, dude!Copy !req
246. Now, young man,
school is a timeCopy !req
247. for learning, okay?
Not for immature skylarkings.Copy !req
248. What's "sky larkings"?Copy !req
249. You know,
like tomfooleries.Copy !req
250. Who?Copy !req
251. Oh, your
parents are here.Copy !req
252. Oh, no.
- Thank you for comingCopy !req
253. on such short notice.
I was just discipliningCopy !req
254. your son for his sky larkings.Copy !req
255. Stanley, I—
"sky larkings"?Copy !req
256. Okay?Copy !req
257. Stanley, I want you
to explain to meCopy !req
258. why you were
passing notes in school.Copy !req
259. Randy,
let me handle this.Copy !req
260. Now, Stanley,
I want you to explain to meCopy !req
261. why you were
passing notes in school.Copy !req
262. It wasn't my note, dude.
It was some girl's.Copy !req
263. Okay, Stanley, we're all here
to get to the rootCopy !req
264. of your behavior disorder.Copy !req
265. You really should
know better, Stanley.Copy !req
266. You need to
shape up, mister.Copy !req
267. Don't interrupt me.Copy !req
268. You always interrupt me
when I talk.Copy !req
269. Can't you see that—
—I don't interrupt you.Copy !req
270. There, you did it again.
He interrupted me again.Copy !req
271. Okay, perhaps you should
let your wifeCopy !req
272. finish talking, Mr. Marsh.
Now, Stan, I want you toCopy !req
273. Okay, I'm sorry to interrupt,
but she alwaysCopy !req
274. takes over
any conversation.Copy !req
275. Uh, taking over
any conversations bad?Copy !req
276. Like you're one to talk.
When's the last timeCopy !req
277. you really listened
to what I had to say?Copy !req
278. Uh, uh, okay.
- When was the last timeCopy !req
279. you had anything
interesting to say?Copy !req
280. It's always gossip
and stupid crap.Copy !req
281. Apparently,
we have a bit of aCopy !req
282. communication problem here.Copy !req
283. Mr. Marsh,
tell me how you're feeling.Copy !req
284. Well, I feel like
everything I do is wrong.Copy !req
285. It doesn't matter what I say.Copy !req
286. Okay, that's valid.
Now, Mrs. Marsh,Copy !req
287. how do you feel?
- Excuse me.Copy !req
288. Like I'm a ghost,Copy !req
289. like he sees right through me.
- Oh, please!Copy !req
290. Hello.
- Oh, please, yourself.Copy !req
291. Who tries to control
the marriage?Copy !req
292. And by that,
I mean who's dominatingCopy !req
293. the aspects
of the relationship?Copy !req
294. He is.
- No, she is.Copy !req
295. Oh, I'm sorry,
I guess I'm wrong again!Copy !req
296. Okay...Copy !req
297. Look at it, Kenny.Copy !req
298. It is the greatest
clubhouse ever built.Copy !req
299. Uhhuh.
- And we built it,Copy !req
300. with our own hands.Copy !req
301. Now all we need
is chicks, Kenny.Copy !req
302. - Yeah!
- All right,Copy !req
303. you go find chicks, Kenny.Copy !req
304. Because I have
to stay here and work.Copy !req
305. I still got
to shingle the roof,Copy !req
306. test the foundation,
run all kinds of inspections,Copy !req
307. I've got way too much to do,
and all you have to doCopy !req
308. is go find chicks.
Now, stop your bitchin'!Copy !req
309. Mom, can I watch
"American Gladiators"?Copy !req
310. Dude, where have you been?Copy !req
311. I've been waiting
all afternoon.Copy !req
312. I got in trouble
for that note Bebe was tryingCopy !req
313. to pass to you.
- To me?Copy !req
314. I mean, no,
not to you, forget it.Copy !req
315. Come on, dude, we have to
finish our clubhouse quick.Copy !req
316. The girls want to play
Truth or Dare, tomorrow.Copy !req
317. We should use nails, dude.Copy !req
318. My mom won't let us.Copy !req
319. Hi, guys, how's
the clubhouse coming?Copy !req
320. Pretty good,
we're almost done.Copy !req
321. Well hurry, we want to
play Truth or Dare.Copy !req
322. We're going
as fast as we can.Copy !req
323. Kyle, could you
turn around for a second?Copy !req
324. Thank you.Copy !req
325. Come on, dude,
we have to hammer faster.Copy !req
326. Hey, Stan, do you know how
to play Truth or Dare?Copy !req
327. No.
- Well, dude, how the hellCopy !req
328. are we supposed
to play it then?Copy !req
329. I didn't even
think about that!Copy !req
330. And then they'll
ask, "Truth or Dare?"Copy !req
331. And I say "dare."
- No, no, you say "truth."Copy !req
332. Truth?
But that's boring.Copy !req
333. I want to get
dared to kiss her.Copy !req
334. You have to say truth
the first few timesCopy !req
335. or else you'll seem to eager.
- Oh.Copy !req
336. You can't seem to eager.
You got to play it cool.Copy !req
337. Like you don't even
care what happens.Copy !req
338. Yeah.
Then after a few truths,Copy !req
339. you finally answer "dare."
- Dare!Copy !req
340. But not like that, son.
Like this:Copy !req
341. Dare...Copy !req
342. Oh.
And then her little friendCopy !req
343. will dare you to kiss Wendy.Copy !req
344. You really think so?
- Of course she will.Copy !req
345. They're women.Copy !req
346. They've had this
whole thing planned outCopy !req
347. months ahead of time.
- Wow!Copy !req
348. Hey, hey, hey,
what's going down, y'all?Copy !req
349. Man, Fat Abbot,
what are you doingCopy !req
350. on this side of the hood?Copy !req
351. You know something, Rudy,Copy !req
352. you're like school
in summertime.Copy !req
353. School in summertime?Copy !req
354. Yeah, bitch.
School in summertime.Copy !req
355. Open your
earsCopy !req
356. or I'll pop your
bitchass.Copy !req
357. I'lla popa youra bitcha
assa tooba, bitcha.Copy !req
358. What the hell is
going on in this cartoon?Copy !req
359. Oh, hey, Kenny,
did you find any chicksCopy !req
360. to come to the clubhouse?Copy !req
361. Uh-huh.Copy !req
362. Hi, we ran
away from home.Copy !req
363. Like, this kid told us
we might be able toCopy !req
364. crash at your clubhouse
for a couple of days.Copy !req
365. Holy crap!Copy !req
366. Behold, Ewok Village 2000!Copy !req
367. Oh, well, I guess
it beats living at home.Copy !req
368. Can I offer you ladies a cool
beverage or a tasty snack?Copy !req
369. Hello?Copy !req
370. How's the clubhouse coming,
Stan?Copy !req
371. We're working on it.Copy !req
372. Well,
I just thought I'd tell youCopy !req
373. that me and Kenny
have finished our clubhouse,Copy !req
374. and we already
have chicks over.Copy !req
375. No, you don't.Copy !req
376. Dude!
- It's only a matter of timeCopy !req
377. before we're playing
Truth or Dare with them.Copy !req
378. Good luck with your
pieceofcrap clubhouse.Copy !req
379. Asshole!
- Fat ass, fat hunk of fat.Copy !req
380. Mom,
will you please ask DadCopy !req
381. to come help me
build my clubhouse?Copy !req
382. Stanley,
I think you should knowCopy !req
383. that your father
has moved out.Copy !req
384. What!
Why?Copy !req
385. Because...
We're divorced, Stanley.Copy !req
386. Divorced, oh no!Copy !req
387. Does that mean you and Dad
don't love me anymore?Copy !req
388. This is all my fault,
isn't it?Copy !req
389. Yeah, kind of.Copy !req
390. Dude, you're not
supposed to say that.Copy !req
391. But I would like you to
meet your new stepfather, Roy.Copy !req
392. Hello, son.
- What?Copy !req
393. I'll leave you two alone
to get acquainted.Copy !req
394. Hello, Stanley.
I know this must beCopy !req
395. a very difficult period
for you right now,Copy !req
396. and the adjustment is
going to take some time,Copy !req
397. but I'd like
to be your friend.Copy !req
398. So when you're ready,
I want you to feel freeCopy !req
399. to come to me with
anything you might need,Copy !req
400. whether it's advice or just
someone to play catch with.Copy !req
401. You can count on me.Copy !req
402. This is happening
way too fast.Copy !req
403. Oh, Jesus,
when are you going to cut meCopy !req
404. some slack, huh?
I have taken you under my wingCopy !req
405. and done my best,
and all you ever doCopy !req
406. is whine and moan about it!
Now, for the last time,Copy !req
407. go cut some firewood!Copy !req
408. So I'm on my way
out the door and she goes,Copy !req
409. "Make sure you're
home before midnight."Copy !req
410. Oh, that's weak.
- And I go,Copy !req
411. "Listen, bitch,
I don't need my motherCopy !req
412. giving me no curfew."
- That's killer.Copy !req
413. And she goes, "If you're
not home before midnight,Copy !req
414. don't bother
coming home at all."Copy !req
415. That's totally weak.
- So I go,Copy !req
416. "Fine, I won't come home."
- Sweet.Copy !req
417. And then she goes,
"Fine don't come home."Copy !req
418. Getting all in my face and crap
and acting all tough and crap.Copy !req
419. - Killer weak sweet.
I'm 16,Copy !req
420. I should be able to do
what I want, when I want.Copy !req
421. I don't need her breathing down
my neck every two secondsCopy !req
422. telling me what
I can and cannot do.Copy !req
423. I had the same thing
with my mom the other day.Copy !req
424. I'm all like, "Hey,
I'm not a little kid anymore.Copy !req
425. "Mom, I'm eight years old,
and if I want to finger paint,Copy !req
426. then I'm going
to finger paint!"Copy !req
427. Okay, we're done.Copy !req
428. Dude, I don't think
this is very sturdy.Copy !req
429. It doesn't matter, dude.
It only has to lastCopy !req
430. long enough to play
Truth or Dare.Copy !req
431. I'm going to go
get the girls.Copy !req
432. Okay.Copy !req
433. Oh!
- Stanley, it's time to go!Copy !req
434. Go where?
- Your bastard fatherCopy !req
435. has visitation rights,
and this is his time with you.Copy !req
436. But, nah, I have to go
get the girls to come—Copy !req
437. Come on, Stanley.
- Weak!Copy !req
438. Dad?
- Hey, Stanley, hop in.Copy !req
439. Listen, Stanley,
I know all this changeCopy !req
440. must be tough on you,
but your mother and I thoughtCopy !req
441. it'd be best for all of us
if we split up.Copy !req
442. But I don't understand
why we have to—Copy !req
443. Well hello, ladies!Copy !req
444. Hi, handsome, we're gonna
be at Larry's Bar tonight.Copy !req
445. I'm already there.Copy !req
446. What were we talking about?
Oh, yeah.Copy !req
447. See, your mother and I still
care about you and your sister,Copy !req
448. but we just don't like being
around each other anymore.Copy !req
449. Well, I don't like being
around my sister anymore,Copy !req
450. does that mean I can
leave her, too?Copy !req
451. Well, no,
because you're family,Copy !req
452. you can't just leave family.
You have stickCopy !req
453. with family no matter what.
But you and mom are family,Copy !req
454. how come you can just split up?Copy !req
455. You know what I think?
I think that when you and momCopy !req
456. got married, you became family
and now that you are,Copy !req
457. you shouldn't be able
to leave her any more thanCopy !req
458. I can leave my sister.
Oh, Stan, you're so young.Copy !req
459. You just don't get it.Copy !req
460. Well anyway, have a nice day.
- What, that's it?Copy !req
461. Yeah, but I loved
our time together.Copy !req
462. I hate to see it end,
go on, get out.Copy !req
463. You know that nothing
is more important to meCopy !req
464. than you, right, Stan?
- I guess, but—Copy !req
465. The girls are gonna be here
to play Truth or Dare any minute.Copy !req
466. Stan, if I didn't
know you better,Copy !req
467. I'd almost think
you're doing this becauseCopy !req
468. you want to play with girls.
- No way, dude.Copy !req
469. Don't be silly.
- Come on, Wendy!Copy !req
470. We have to say "truth"
a couple of timesCopy !req
471. before we say "dare", right?
- Right, why?Copy !req
472. Because if we don't,
we'll seem too eager.Copy !req
473. Too eager to what?Copy !req
474. To say dare,
dumb-ass, geez.Copy !req
475. Hi guys.Copy !req
476. Oh, hi, Wendy,
what's up?Copy !req
477. Don't you guys still
want to play Truth or Dare?Copy !req
478. Yeah!
I mean... Sure, whatever.Copy !req
479. Then come on!Copy !req
480. Remember truth the
first couple of times.Copy !req
481. Okay.
- Who wants to go first?Copy !req
482. I will. Kyle?
- Yeah?Copy !req
483. Truth or Dare?
- Um, dare?Copy !req
484. Dude!
- What?Copy !req
485. Kiss Bebe on the lips.Copy !req
486. What? Sick, dude!
I'm not kissing a girl!Copy !req
487. What's the matter, Kyle?Copy !req
488. It's just wrong,
that's all!Copy !req
489. Don't be a chicken, dude.
Just close your eyes.Copy !req
490. What the hell have
you gotten me into!Copy !req
491. Dude, Cartman
is in his clubhouseCopy !req
492. playing Truth or Dare
with girls right now.Copy !req
493. Do you really want him
to beat us?Copy !req
494. Oh, boy.Copy !req
495. Sick!
Ah, fucking sickening!Copy !req
496. Wow, look at that ass.
Shake it, baby!Copy !req
497. Your turn, Bebe.Copy !req
498. Okay, Stan, Truth or Dare?Copy !req
499. Stan, Truth or Dare?Copy !req
500. Dare.Copy !req
501. Son, could you please come
help me with the firewood?Copy !req
502. Dude, we cut firewood
all day yesterday.Copy !req
503. We have enough
to last 12 years.Copy !req
504. When will you let me in,
let me love you!Copy !req
505. Now get your ass
out here and help me.Copy !req
506. Bye, Stan.
Hopefully we can playCopy !req
507. Truth or Dare tomorrow.
- Crap!Copy !req
508. I think you should be
able to move outCopy !req
509. legally when you're 14.Copy !req
510. Our moms won't even
let us smoke.Copy !req
511. Yeah, it's my body.Copy !req
512. My mom always gives me shit
for smoking, but it's my body.Copy !req
513. I should be able to do
whatever I want with it.Copy !req
514. Totally. My mom gives
me shit sometimes,Copy !req
515. and I tell her to
shut her holeCopy !req
516. before I kick her in the nuts.Copy !req
517. Eric, Pookums,
it's time for mommyCopy !req
518. to tuck you into your
snuggle bed for nightnight.Copy !req
519. Eric, are you out there
in your clubhouse?Copy !req
520. Coming, Mom.Copy !req
521. Okay, we have to play
Truth or Dare, quick!Copy !req
522. What's up?
- Hey, girls.Copy !req
523. Oh, hey, Scott.Copy !req
524. Who the hell are you?Copy !req
525. Oh, we invited
some people over.Copy !req
526. - Hope you don't mind.
- How many people?Copy !req
527. Kyle, can I talk to you?
- Okay.Copy !req
528. Kyle, this is
very difficult for me.Copy !req
529. I think we need time apart.
- Huh?Copy !req
530. I'm just feeling
really trapped.Copy !req
531. I can't go on with
this codependency.Copy !req
532. Okay, that's fine.
- No, no, don't speak.Copy !req
533. Just try and understand.
It has to be this way.Copy !req
534. But I don't care.Copy !req
535. Please, just remember
the good times we had.Copy !req
536. I'll never forget you.
Never.Copy !req
537. Okay, Clyde, we can go now.
- Bitchin'.Copy !req
538. These are cafe curtains
that require no sewingCopy !req
539. and I know
you all love that!Copy !req
540. Do you mind
if I watch cartoons?Copy !req
541. I've had a rough day.Copy !req
542. What?
- Chores. Do chores.Copy !req
543. My dad lets me
watch cartoons.Copy !req
544. Well, I'm not your dad,
okay?Copy !req
545. I'm not your dad!Copy !req
546. You can't just go around
playing games with my emotions.Copy !req
547. Stanley,Copy !req
548. what did you do to Roy?Copy !req
549. Roy's a dick.
He ruined my chancesCopy !req
550. with Wendy in the clubhouse.Copy !req
551. Stanley,
you know you're the mostCopy !req
552. important thing to me, right?Copy !req
553. If that's true, then get back
together with Dad for me.Copy !req
554. Now, Stanley, you have to
understand how divorce works.Copy !req
555. When I say you're the most
important thing to me,Copy !req
556. what I mean is, you're the most
important thing after me,Copy !req
557. and my happiness
and my new romances.Copy !req
558. Oh.
- Bye now. Roy?Copy !req
559. Divorce is stupid.Copy !req
560. Hey, hey, hey.
Hey, Yolanda,Copy !req
561. why's your eye all black
and blue and?Copy !req
562. Man, Fat Abbot, my stepdad
popped me in my eye.Copy !req
563. Stepdad?
You got to off his ass.Copy !req
564. Really?
- Yeah, bitch!Copy !req
565. Snatch his ass
in a bear trap.Copy !req
566. Leave that swinging
from a tree so high,Copy !req
567. nobody finds him for days.Copy !req
568. Glockglock,
you know what I'm saying?Copy !req
569. Dumbass,
pulling, damn!Copy !req
570. You're right,
Fat Abbot, thanks!Copy !req
571. No problem, ho'.
Maybe later you canCopy !req
572. suck my,
bitch ho'.Copy !req
573. Well, Fat Abbot
and the gang sure didCopy !req
574. learn something today.Copy !req
575. If you have a stepdad
riding your ass,Copy !req
576. just snatch his ass
in a bear trap.Copy !req
577. Crack, no more stepdad.Copy !req
578. See you next time,
eating the pudding.Copy !req
579. Yeah, yeah, I think I'll
write a little note for Roy.Copy !req
580. Hey, kid, give me
some of those.Copy !req
581. Hey, when are we
gonna play Truth or Dare?Copy !req
582. What?
That game's for kids.Copy !req
583. This is bullcrap!
- Oh, boy, it's getting late.Copy !req
584. I'm gonna have
to leave this party.Copy !req
585. This sucks, Kenny.Copy !req
586. I wish we'd never
built a clubhouse.Copy !req
587. Mosh pit!Copy !req
588. Hmm?Copy !req
589. Oh, my God,
they killed Kenny!Copy !req
590. You bastards!Copy !req
591. Stanley, your father is
coming over for visitation.Copy !req
592. Stan?Copy !req
593. "Meet me in
the clubhouse."Copy !req
594. Sharon, Sharon, have you seen
my copy of "Harper's"?Copy !req
595. "Meet me at the clubhouse."Copy !req
596. Oh, Randy, what are
you doing here?Copy !req
597. I, uh, got a note
from StanleyCopy !req
598. to come out
to the clubhouse.Copy !req
599. Oh, I thought
that note was for me.Copy !req
600. Oh, maybe it was.Copy !req
601. Well, it looks like
our little StanleyCopy !req
602. has built himself
quite a clubhouse here.Copy !req
603. I remember not too long ago
we were just kidsCopy !req
604. playing kissing games
in my clubhouse.Copy !req
605. Good night.Copy !req
606. Sharon?
- Yes?Copy !req
607. Truth or Dare.
- It's too late for games.Copy !req
608. No, I'm serious, please.
Truth or Dare?Copy !req
609. Truth.
- Do you still love me?Copy !req
610. Oh, Randy, I do love you,
but now I'm so confused.Copy !req
611. I'm living with Roy,
and I don't knowCopy !req
612. how to
break it off with him.Copy !req
613. Sharon?Copy !req
614. Well, you never know.Copy !req
615. Maybe things will work out.Copy !req
616. Hello?
- Maybe.Copy !req
617. I guess it's my turn.
- Truth or Dare?Copy !req
618. - Sharon?
- Dare...Copy !req
619. Do me,
right here in the clubhouse.Copy !req
620. Hello, hello?Copy !req
621. Can somebody cut me—
Hello?Copy !req
622. Wow, clubhouses are magical.Copy !req
623. Okay, it's my turn.
Stan, Truth or Dare?Copy !req
624. Dare.Copy !req
625. Take this stick
and jam it up your peehole.Copy !req
626. What!
- Wow, that sucks!Copy !req
627. Do you think it'll hurt?Copy !req
628. Hello?Copy !req
629. I sure am hungry.Copy !req
630. Anybody?Copy !req
631. It certainly does
suck right here.Copy !req
632. Hello?Copy !req
633. Sh-Sh-Sharon?Copy !req
634. Sharon, hello?Copy !req