1. Hello, sir.
My name is Red,Copy !req
2. and I go to
South Park Elementary.Copy !req
3. Would you like to sign
my petition?Copy !req
4. Why sure, little girl.Copy !req
5. What's your petition for?Copy !req
6. It's to try and get everyone
to smell my farts.Copy !req
7. Whoa, whoa, whoa!
What's going on here?Copy !req
8. Oh, wow, Santa Claus!Copy !req
9. You've been a bad girl, Red,Copy !req
10. so I'm gonna piss
in your face now.Copy !req
11. Oh, no, you better not,
Santa!Copy !req
12. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!Copy !req
13. - Ew!
- Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!Copy !req
14. See?Copy !req
15. And then Santa Claus pisses
in her face!Copy !req
16. There, now you smell
like Santa's piss.Copy !req
17. Wow, that looks pretty real.Copy !req
18. Hey, fellas!Copy !req
19. Fellas, check this out!Copy !req
20. Me and Kenny made
a generative AI videoCopy !req
21. of Red getting pissed on
by Santa Claus.Copy !req
22. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!Copy !req
23. Aw, dude.Copy !req
24. It's really easy,
you can make the videos online.Copy !req
25. We made one
of Red eating dog shit,Copy !req
26. and one of Red
barfing up tampons.Copy !req
27. Dude, that's not cool.Copy !req
28. Yeah, why would you guys
do this to her?Copy !req
29. 'Cause Red's a bitch!
She totally used me.Copy !req
30. Red pretended she liked me
to get me to buy her a Labubu.Copy !req
31. That bitch deserves it.Copy !req
32. You shouldn't be using AI to
make revenge porn, Butters.Copy !req
33. That's gonna totally backfire.Copy !req
34. Ah, what's gonna happen?Copy !req
35. Ho, ho, ho, ho.Copy !req
36. That little shit!
Ho, ho, ho, ho!Copy !req
37. That little shit!Copy !req
38. It's already
all over the school.Copy !req
39. Butters is trying
to humiliate you.Copy !req
40. What the hell
did I do to him?Copy !req
41. Well, you did kind of
use him.Copy !req
42. I didn't use him.Copy !req
43. He wanted to buy me a Labubu.Copy !req
44. You should go tell
the principal, Red.Copy !req
45. They said if anyone made
these kind of videosCopy !req
46. of other students,
they'd call the police.Copy !req
47. I don't need to tell
the principal.Copy !req
48. There's gonna be a big assembly
this afternoon.Copy !req
49. I'll get Butters back myself.Copy !req
50. All right, everyone,
listen up.Copy !req
51. As you know, most of your
brains have been sucked voidCopy !req
52. of common sense
by the woke radical left.Copy !req
53. And so today's topic is about
having some prideCopy !req
54. in America's heritage!Copy !req
55. Pay attention.Copy !req
56. America.Copy !req
57. It was built on a dream.Copy !req
58. An idea that almost all people
should be free.Copy !req
59. When our forefathers first
came to this great nation,Copy !req
60. they—-in the—
- Mayflower—Copy !req
61. Plymouth—Copy !req
62. Well, hey, everybody!Copy !req
63. It's me, Butters.Copy !req
64. And this is my friend, Totoro.Copy !req
65. And you know what I'm gonna do?Copy !req
66. I'm gonna fuck him.Copy !req
67. Yep, that's right,
I'm Butters,Copy !req
68. and I'm gonna have sex
with Totoro right now.Copy !req
69. Oh! Oh.Copy !req
70. Whoa!Copy !req
71. Oh, you bitch!Copy !req
72. What the hell is this?Copy !req
73. I told him.Copy !req
74. All right, Mrs. Cartman,
let me get this straight.Copy !req
75. You say the government...
took your child?Copy !req
76. Eric was very sick.Copy !req
77. The doctor said
he only hadCopy !req
78. another six or seven weeks
to live.Copy !req
79. And these people said
they could help himCopy !req
80. if they took him to Washington.Copy !req
81. And they didn't invite you
to go alone?Copy !req
82. Seems a little farfetched.Copy !req
83. It was all so confusing.Copy !req
84. They said it was about
national security.Copy !req
85. I've been getting updates
and emails,Copy !req
86. but I don't even know
what to believe anymore.Copy !req
87. Detective Harris, sir,Copy !req
88. we need to get down
to the school right away.Copy !req
89. What's the matter?Copy !req
90. There's a young boy there, sir.Copy !req
91. Appears he's been molested
by Totoro.Copy !req
92. Holy shit!
Sorry, Mrs. Cartman.Copy !req
93. We'll look into it for you
when we can.Copy !req
94. But what about Eric?Copy !req
95. All right, kid, you wanna
tell me what happened?Copy !req
96. I don't know nuttin'!Copy !req
97. We've seen the video, kid.Copy !req
98. How long have you and Totoro
been sexually active?Copy !req
99. What?Copy !req
100. I don't know nuttin'!Copy !req
101. Look, that forest-dwelling
piece of shitCopy !req
102. is just gonna keep doing this
to kidsCopy !req
103. unless you talk to us.Copy !req
104. I wanna know where
you met Totoro,Copy !req
105. and I want a description
of his penis.Copy !req
106. Sir, you better come
take a look at this.Copy !req
107. What is it?Copy !req
108. There's another young student
here at this schoolCopy !req
109. that appears to have just been
raped by Popeye.Copy !req
110. Popeye?
That son of a bitch!Copy !req
111. I don't know nuttin'!Copy !req
112. Huh, yuck, yuck, yuck,
yuck, yuck.Copy !req
113. Oh-ho, whoa!
Yuck...Copy !req
114. Jesus Christ.Copy !req
115. Yuck, yuck, yuck,
yuck, yuck, oh...Copy !req
116. Oh, my God!
What the hell is going on here?Copy !req
117. We think Totoro and Popeye
might somehowCopy !req
118. be working together, sir.Copy !req
119. This all has to be connected.Copy !req
120. A string of rapes,
the missing Cartman boy—Copy !req
121. South Park's going to shit
right before our eyes.Copy !req
122. Sir?Copy !req
123. There's something very wrong
going on here, Mitch,Copy !req
124. and I'm gonna find out what.Copy !req
125. Boss,Copy !req
126. please don't be mad at me.Copy !req
127. Everything I did...Copy !req
128. I did for you.Copy !req
129. You were manipulating me.Copy !req
130. This whole time, you've been
trying to get meCopy !req
131. to get rid of Satan's baby.Copy !req
132. Yes, because I know you want
to get rid of the baby, boss.Copy !req
133. I was just trying to help you.Copy !req
134. I would do anything for you.Copy !req
135. You...Copy !req
136. are the greatest bossCopy !req
137. I ever had.Copy !req
138. And I just want you
to be happy.Copy !req
139. Of course
I don't want the baby,Copy !req
140. but everyone's so excited.Copy !req
141. I can't get out of it.Copy !req
142. I have a guy, boss.Copy !req
143. He's in Colorado right now.Copy !req
144. He is an expert in all of this.Copy !req
145. Nobody's here to
embarrass you, all right son?Copy !req
146. We just wanna know what
happened between you and Popeye.Copy !req
147. You can't tell 'em
the girls did it to youCopy !req
148. 'cause you helped me
or they're gonna knowCopy !req
149. we did it to them first!Copy !req
150. We don't know nothing!Copy !req
151. Did Totoro tell you
to say that?Copy !req
152. You don't need
to protect these scumbags.Copy !req
153. Sir,
there's a Studio Ghibli hereCopy !req
154. that wants to talk to the kid.Copy !req
155. What's s Studio Ghibli?Copy !req
156. Some Japanese guys,
say they represent Totoro.Copy !req
157. You!Copy !req
158. You fuck Totoro!Copy !req
159. Totoro is Studio Ghibli IP!Copy !req
160. Ah, Totoro's already got
some lawyers, huh?Copy !req
161. It takes hundreds of artistsCopy !req
162. three years to make Totoro!Copy !req
163. And in two minutesCopy !req
164. you spit out you shitCopy !req
165. and fuck Totoro!Copy !req
166. Studio Ghibli no sakuhin!Copy !req
167. What?Copy !req
168. All right, I can't understand
a word anyone here is saying.Copy !req
169. You stop!Copy !req
170. This is a "shi-shu"
and "deshishto!"Copy !req
171. "Shi-shu" and "deshishto!"Copy !req
172. Mitch, get 'em outta here!Copy !req
173. Shimatta!Copy !req
174. Totoro no meiyo ga kegasareta!Copy !req
175. You cannot just do
whatever you wantCopy !req
176. with someone else's IP!Copy !req
177. Yo, what's up, Mom?
It's your boy, Eric,Copy !req
178. live from Washington, D.C.
Day one, baby.Copy !req
179. Look,
that's a big pointy thing—Copy !req
180. uh, the Washington Monument.Copy !req
181. Whole reflection pool's
right there.Copy !req
182. It's like a giant bathtub,
but with ducks.Copy !req
183. Everything's great. Promise.Copy !req
184. Hey, Mom, it's me.
Just want you to knowCopy !req
185. I am totally safe
and in no danger whatsoever.Copy !req
186. Dude, there's a castle
at the end of the streetCopy !req
187. and everyone smells
like popcorn.Copy !req
188. This is unreal, forever.Copy !req
189. Just want to let everyone know
I'm safe and sound.Copy !req
190. No, kitty, that's my pot pie!Copy !req
191. I love Cheesy Poofs and—Copy !req
192. Rawr! Respect my authority!
Bye!Copy !req
193. Oh, Eric,Copy !req
194. Mommy misses you.Copy !req
195. "A boy from South ParkCopy !req
196. "tells his mom he's doing goodCopy !req
197. and he'll be home soon."Copy !req
198. Hey, dude, fuck you.Copy !req
199. That is totally not cool,
what you're doing.Copy !req
200. "The boy is fatCopy !req
201. and authoritative."Copy !req
202. Hey, Mom,
things are good here.Copy !req
203. I love Cheesy Poofs!Copy !req
204. I'm just stoked
to be feeling better,Copy !req
205. and I'll be home soon.
Respect my authority!Copy !req
206. Bro, everyone's gonna know
that's not really me.Copy !req
207. I haven't even talked
about Cheesy PoofsCopy !req
208. in, like, five years.Copy !req
209. You shut up!Copy !req
210. We'll be going
to Washington soon,Copy !req
211. and then you're gonna help meCopy !req
212. stop the antichrist
from being born.Copy !req
213. And we're gonna save the world.Copy !req
214. Not for free, dude!Copy !req
215. If you wanna use me, then you
gotta pay a motherfucker.Copy !req
216. You don't get to make me go do
a bunch of weird shitCopy !req
217. that I would normally never do.Copy !req
218. It's the world you live in, kid.Copy !req
219. Anyone can make you
do anything they want.Copy !req
220. No, kitty,
that's my authority!Copy !req
221. Pot pie!Copy !req
222. I word really hard.
You know?Copy !req
223. I just feel like I deserve
to relax a bit, guy.Copy !req
224. Of course you do, boss.Copy !req
225. This baby is too much for you.Copy !req
226. I tried abortion clinics,
Plan B,Copy !req
227. but this baby just won't die!Copy !req
228. And that is how my guy in
Colorado can help us, boss.Copy !req
229. Only he can stop the antichrist.Copy !req
230. If we bring him here,
to Washington, then we can—Copy !req
231. What are you guys doing?Copy !req
232. Hey, relax, guy!Copy !req
233. We're having
an important meeting!Copy !req
234. What are you talking about?Copy !req
235. It's government stuff, Satan.Copy !req
236. OK, so I guess
I'm going to the pediatricianCopy !req
237. by myself again.Copy !req
238. Hey, relax, guy!Copy !req
239. We have to do this.Copy !req
240. You're such a piece of shit.Copy !req
241. You see?
Always bitching at me.Copy !req
242. I should be treated better
than that.Copy !req
243. Yes, boss, you should.Copy !req
244. That's why you need to trust me.Copy !req
245. Nobody feels for you
the way that I do.Copy !req
246. Nobody, boss.Copy !req
247. Hey, Red, can we talk to you?Copy !req
248. Sure, Kyle.Copy !req
249. I'm here to help Butters
try to call a truce.Copy !req
250. What kind of truce?Copy !req
251. It's just all this Sora stuff
is kinda getting out of hand.Copy !req
252. I know Butters started it,Copy !req
253. so then you guys made one
of him,Copy !req
254. but then you guys made one
of Kenny,Copy !req
255. and I just think we all need
to respect each other more.Copy !req
256. You know what?
You're right, Kyle.Copy !req
257. You're really a smart guy.Copy !req
258. Thanks, Red.
I feel like a smart guy.Copy !req
259. It's 'cause I'm a Jew.Copy !req
260. Excuse me, is your name Kyle?Copy !req
261. Oh, wow, it's Droopy Dog!Copy !req
262. Hey, Droopy Dog.
Yeah, I'm Kyle.Copy !req
263. You know what?Copy !req
264. I'm gonna take a shit
in your mouth.Copy !req
265. Oh, no, Droopy Dog,
don't shit in my mouth!Copy !req
266. Bad dog!Copy !req
267. Here it comes.Copy !req
268. You like that, you dumb Jew?Copy !req
269. - Dude, what the hell?
- You see?Copy !req
270. The girls did one
about you now.Copy !req
271. What the hell did I do?Copy !req
272. It don't matter, I told you!Copy !req
273. Red's just a bitch.Copy !req
274. You like that hot shit
in your Jew mouth?Copy !req
275. I mean, you got to admit
it's pretty impressive.Copy !req
276. It looks really real.Copy !req
277. It's not impressive!
It's fucked up.Copy !req
278. How is this even legal?Copy !req
279. Nothing's sacred, Kyle.Copy !req
280. All you can do is fight fire
with fire.Copy !req
281. Well, then let's see
how Red likes itCopy !req
282. when we make one of her
and Bluey.Copy !req
283. Yeah!Copy !req
284. We've had 12 new cases
in the past 14 hours,Copy !req
285. and you're telling me we can't
get one kid to testify?Copy !req
286. None of the kids will talk, sir.Copy !req
287. We're running out of time
here, people.Copy !req
288. These predators are all gonna
start lawyering upCopy !req
289. like Totoro did.Copy !req
290. We're not lawyer!Copy !req
291. Studio Ghibli make TotoroCopy !req
292. with pencil and paint,Copy !req
293. not by typing sentence
on stupid Sora app!Copy !req
294. Nobody can understand
anything you're saying,Copy !req
295. so I don't know
what to tell you, buddy.Copy !req
296. We're just getting
no cooperation.Copy !req
297. Every kid we interview,
we get the same thing.Copy !req
298. "That's not me.
Someone else did that."Copy !req
299. That's the South Park
we're living in, Mitch.Copy !req
300. Kids won't talk to a cop,Copy !req
301. but they'll do anything Rocky
and Bullwinkle tell 'em to do.Copy !req
302. That's it.Copy !req
303. We gotta go undercover
as a couple of these predatorsCopy !req
304. and gain a little kid's trust.Copy !req
305. Yeah. What's going on?Copy !req
306. Everything is OK.Copy !req
307. We have Trump's approval now.Copy !req
308. The president knows
of our plans?Copy !req
309. Yes.Copy !req
310. He and I are on the same page.Copy !req
311. What's he say?Copy !req
312. But we cannot proceed
just yet.Copy !req
313. Can you keep the child on ice
a little longer?Copy !req
314. No problem—with Sora 2,Copy !req
315. I can make the South Park kid
do just about anything.Copy !req
316. Dude, fuck you.Copy !req
317. That is so lame.Copy !req
318. But boss, what about Satan?Copy !req
319. Oh, boss, it's so big.Copy !req
320. Oh, boss!Copy !req
321. Boss!Copy !req
322. Yes, boss!Copy !req
323. How much longer we gotta do
this shit, Mitch?Copy !req
324. You remember
when things made sense?Copy !req
325. You put your time in.
You did the work.Copy !req
326. But now this stuff
we're seeing,Copy !req
327. it's like someone shook
the snow globe and said,Copy !req
328. "Here you go,
make sense of this."Copy !req
329. I don't understand it much
either, sir.Copy !req
330. Maybe we're just too old.Copy !req
331. We used to go after
normal criminals.Copy !req
332. But now the criminals have
faces that can just startCopy !req
333. turning into oranges
that eat other oranges.Copy !req
334. That's when you realizeCopy !req
335. maybe the job doesn't need you
anymore.Copy !req
336. Hey, look.
Kid's coming out.Copy !req
337. Let's do this.Copy !req
338. Hey there, little girl.
It's Rocky and Bullwinkle.Copy !req
339. You looking for a good time?Copy !req
340. The South Park Police
Department had to go undercoverCopy !req
341. in order to finally get
to the truth in this case.Copy !req
342. And what the evidence will showCopy !req
343. is that an innocent girl
was humiliatedCopy !req
344. by the actions of these boys.Copy !req
345. All right, little girl,
you say the boys just used you.Copy !req
346. Is that right?Copy !req
347. That's right.Copy !req
348. They made me do things
I would normally never do.Copy !req
349. Exactly what kinds of things?Copy !req
350. They made me
go to the bathroomCopy !req
351. in a very, very bad place.Copy !req
352. And did the suspects
offer youCopy !req
353. any kind of compensation?Copy !req
354. I didn't make one cent!Copy !req
355. What the hell is going on?Copy !req
356. They're turning the kids
into the victims?Copy !req
357. This whole thing stinks!Copy !req
358. Why don't you go fuck yourself,
Bluey?Copy !req
359. Order! Order!Copy !req
360. My client has been
misrepresented,Copy !req
361. and these boys are going
to jail!Copy !req
362. It wasn't their fault,
all right?Copy !req
363. It's all my fault!Copy !req
364. This all started with me,Copy !req
365. because my heart was broken.Copy !req
366. I made the first videos
using Sora 2.Copy !req
367. I saw the ones
Eric Cartman madeCopy !req
368. to get out of going to school,
and I thoughtCopy !req
369. I could make these about Red
'cause the bitch deserves it.Copy !req
370. But it was just me.Copy !req
371. Wait, you're saying
that the Eric Cartman videosCopy !req
372. are all being created
by someoneCopy !req
373. to distort the truth?Copy !req
374. That's gotta be Totoro!Copy !req
375. Trace the IP address, and let's
get the son of a bitch!Copy !req
376. Ah!Copy !req
377. Freeze!Copy !req
378. We got the kid, sir.Copy !req
379. You're making a big mistake.Copy !req
380. I have powerful connections.Copy !req
381. Oh, I know you do.Copy !req
382. But no magical Catbus is gonnaCopy !req
383. whisk you away from justice
this time.Copy !req
384. Mom!Copy !req
385. Oh, Eric, you're safe!Copy !req
386. How the hell did it take you
this longCopy !req
387. to figure out
those videos of me were fake?Copy !req
388. Oh, well, they looked
so real, sweetie.Copy !req
389. When is the last time I even
ate a pot pie, you dumb bitch?Copy !req
390. Get him out of here.Copy !req
391. Lock him up
with the Japanese lawyers.Copy !req
392. Well, Mitch, looks like
we just busted a huge communityCopy !req
393. of online rapists
called Sora 2.Copy !req
394. Great job, sir.Copy !req
395. Detective Harris,
you better take a look at this.Copy !req
396. This guy didn't just
make videos.Copy !req
397. He also has
surveillance equipmentCopy !req
398. all over the White House.Copy !req
399. - White House?
- Yeah.Copy !req
400. He's got this video
of the presidentCopy !req
401. in the Lincoln Bedroom.Copy !req
402. Oh, boss!Copy !req
403. Boss!Copy !req
404. Jesus Christ.
Yes, boss!Copy !req
405. Yes, boss!Copy !req
406. Oh, my God, what the hell
is going on here?Copy !req
407. Oh, boy.Copy !req
408. When Fox News sees this,
they are not gonna be happy.Copy !req
409. This is a...
Fox News...Copy !req
410. special alert.Copy !req
411. Some, uh, very troubling news
from the White House today.Copy !req
412. Apparently, a security camera
in the Lincoln BedroomCopy !req
413. has caught President Trump
having... relationsCopy !req
414. with Vice President Vance.Copy !req
415. Fox News is live
at the White House.Copy !req
416. Yeah, hey.Copy !req
417. Definitely disheartening news
here.Copy !req
418. Why the president would do this
to SatanCopy !req
419. with a baby on the way,
we don't know.Copy !req
420. Guess it's anyone's guess why—Copy !req
421. Sorry, sorry, we gotta
interrupt you there.Copy !req
422. Uh, we just got word
that the president isCopy !req
423. calling in to "Fox & Friends."Copy !req
424. Are you there, sir?Copy !req
425. Hello?
Hi? Hello?Copy !req
426. Yes. Mr. President,
what is going on?Copy !req
427. Oh, we're doing
some great things here.Copy !req
428. More than Sleepy Joe Biden
ever did!Copy !req
429. Everything's great!Copy !req
430. Well, what about you
and the vice president?Copy !req
431. Hey, relax, guy!Copy !req
432. We're trying to relax, sir,Copy !req
433. but we've all seen
the security footage.Copy !req
434. No, that's fake!Copy !req
435. That's all—it's all Sora 2.Copy !req
436. It's fake?Copy !req
437. Yeah, guy,
that's all Sora 2!Copy !req
438. That's all fake!Copy !req
439. Oh, it's fake!
Oh, thank God!Copy !req
440. Of course it was fake.
How could we have doubted it?Copy !req
441. This is a Fox News
fake news alert.Copy !req
442. Totally fake news todayCopy !req
443. as the president did not have
sex with the vice president.Copy !req
444. You swear on everything
that video was fake.Copy !req
445. Of course it's fake, Satan!Copy !req
446. OK, 'cause it looks
really real.Copy !req
447. Satan, I swear on the baby.Copy !req
448. I wouldn't do that to you.Copy !req
449. Relax, guy.Copy !req
450. - OK.
- Great.Copy !req
451. Well, I gotta go get a snack.Copy !req
452. You want anything
from downstairs?Copy !req
453. No, I'm good.Copy !req
454. All right,
what's the situation?Copy !req
455. The detective in Colorado
is very stubborn, boss.Copy !req
456. He will not give us
Peter Thiel.Copy !req
457. How can he not hand him over?Copy !req
458. I'm the president!Copy !req
459. Don't worry, boss.Copy !req
460. We will not let that town
get in the wayCopy !req
461. of our plans together.Copy !req