1. Today is a tragic day
for Canada.Copy !req
2. Thousands of Canadians
have gathered to mournCopy !req
3. the passing
of their beloved mother.Copy !req
4. The Queen is dead.Copy !req
5. Every Canadian everywhereCopy !req
6. is feeling absolute emptiness
right now.Copy !req
7. And now the casket
is brought down the aisleCopy !req
8. with the Queen inside.Copy !req
9. The Queen's body being carried
by the royal guard.Copy !req
10. What a horrible day for Canada
and therefore the world.Copy !req
11. Ike, the Queen died
like four months ago.Copy !req
12. You gotta let it go.Copy !req
13. And here comes
Canada's most beloved musician,Copy !req
14. Sir Smelly John.Copy !req
15. Yes, Smelly John
is sitting down at the pianoCopy !req
16. with a tribute
for the Queen, I believe.Copy !req
17. It's my turn
to use the computer.Copy !req
18. Ike, me and my friends are
playing "Darktide" right now.Copy !req
19. Get off!
Fuck you, Kyle!Copy !req
20. Oh, and now people
are starting to stare angrily.Copy !req
21. Y-Yes, it looks like
the Prince and his new wifeCopy !req
22. have just shown up.Copy !req
23. The Prince and his wife
have, of course,Copy !req
24. been bashing
the Canadian monarchy.Copy !req
25. A lot of Canadians
hate them now.Copy !req
26. Oh, and I belive
the Earl of HalifaxCopy !req
27. has just farted
on the Prince's wife's face!Copy !req
28. The Prince seems to have
taken offense to this.Copy !req
29. Oh, this is bad now.Copy !req
30. Ike, I'm playing "Darktide"
with my friends.Copy !req
31. No, get off me!Copy !req
32. Hey, guys.Copy !req
33. Kyle, dude,
where were you last night?Copy !req
34. Yeah, we were all waiting.Copy !req
35. I haven't been
showing up for things, but...Copy !req
36. But I got screwed
by my little brother.Copy !req
37. He just keeps crying
about the Queen.Copy !req
38. And then there's
this Prince and his wifeCopy !req
39. and they're bashing
the Canadian monarchy.Copy !req
40. I guess it's like people
don't even knowCopy !req
41. why they showed up
to the funeralCopy !req
42. But, anyway, I'm really sorry
I ruined game time for everyone.Copy !req
43. You didn't ruin it for anyone.
We played without you.Copy !req
44. What? Y-You guys, we... we said
we'd all level up together.Copy !req
45. Well, yeah, we're
all like level 12 now.Copy !req
46. We got some sweet drip, dude.Copy !req
47. Mrph rmhmhm rm!Copy !req
48. But this isn't fair,
it wasn't my fault.Copy !req
49. Hey, guys. Did you get
to upgrade your rifle, Stan?Copy !req
50. Yeah, it's got
a lot better range now.Copy !req
51. What about you?Copy !req
52. I kept the same gun,
but I got some sweet drip.Copy !req
53. Nice, sweet drip, dude.Copy !req
54. It stinks, doesn't it?Copy !req
55. What stinks?Copy !req
56. When people make certain
judgements about you.Copy !req
57. I've been watching you, Kyle,Copy !req
58. and I can see you're having
some problems with your brand.Copy !req
59. My brand?Copy !req
60. Some kids call it
your credibilityCopy !req
61. or your reputation,Copy !req
62. but those things
are just little partsCopy !req
63. of something
much more important...Copy !req
64. Your brand.Copy !req
65. Think about it, Kyle.Copy !req
66. Who are you?Copy !req
67. I'm just... I-I'm just me.Copy !req
68. See? You don't know
what your brand is.Copy !req
69. So how is anyone else
supposed to know?Copy !req
70. It's like a commercial for Kyle,Copy !req
71. but you're not putting
a label on the jar.Copy !req
72. Butters, this seems
very out of character for you.Copy !req
73. That's because
I've been workin' on my brand.Copy !req
74. My parents saw that my brand
wasn't working with peopleCopy !req
75. so they sent me
to brand management.Copy !req
76. Brand management?Copy !req
77. Hi, Mr. Davis.Copy !req
78. Well, Butters Stotch.
How you doing there, Butters?Copy !req
79. How's the brand going?Copy !req
80. I made two new friends,
and a girl asked meCopy !req
81. to help her with her homework.Copy !req
82. Well, there ya go there, Butters.Copy !req
83. My friend Kyle here was thinking
of reworking his brand a bit,Copy !req
84. and I told him
maybe you could help.Copy !req
85. Oh, well, sure there, Kyle,Copy !req
86. let's just get you to fill out
a CumHammer survey,Copy !req
87. and then we'll go in the backCopy !req
88. and come up
with some options for ya.Copy !req
89. It's "Good Morning, Canada."Copy !req
90. It has been several months nowCopy !req
91. since our beloved Queen
has died.Copy !req
92. All Canadians are finding
it hard to go on.Copy !req
93. All Canadians, that is,
except for our first guests,Copy !req
94. The Prince and his wife.Copy !req
95. We want privacy!
We want privacy!Copy !req
96. Thanks for having us
on the show.Copy !req
97. It's so awesome to be here.
It's great.Copy !req
98. So let me start with you, sir.Copy !req
99. You lived a life
with the royal family,Copy !req
100. you had everything handed to youCopy !req
101. but you say your life
has been hard,Copy !req
102. and you've written all aboot
it in your new book, "Waaagh."Copy !req
103. Yes that's right, fwiend.Copy !req
104. You see, my wife and I are...Copy !req
105. I was totally like,
"You should write a bookCopy !req
106. 'cause you're family's,
like, stupid,Copy !req
107. and then so are, like,
journalists."Copy !req
108. So you hate journalists?Copy !req
109. That's right.Copy !req
110. That reports on the lives
of the royal family.Copy !req
111. Right.Copy !req
112. So you're a journalist.Copy !req
113. We just want
to be normal people.Copy !req
114. All this attention is so hard.Copy !req
115. Isn't it true, sir,
that your questionable wifeCopy !req
116. has her own TV show
and hangs out with celebritiesCopy !req
117. and does fashion magazines?Copy !req
118. What are you suggesting?Copy !req
119. Well, I just think some
people might sayCopy !req
120. that your Instagram-loving
bitch wifeCopy !req
121. actually doesn't
want her privacy.Copy !req
122. How dare you, sir!Copy !req
123. My Instagram-loving bitch wife
has always wanted her privacy!Copy !req
124. And you know what else?
To hell with Canada.Copy !req
125. We are leaving.Copy !req
126. We'll go find some quiet placeCopy !req
127. where we can be normal people.Copy !req
128. Come on, wife.Copy !req
129. We want privacy!
We want privacy!Copy !req
130. We want privacy!
We want privacy!Copy !req
131. We want privacy!
We want privacy!Copy !req
132. We want privacy!
We want privacy!Copy !req
133. Alright there, Kyle,
we got your survey answers,Copy !req
134. and I think we've put together
some great ideas for your brand.Copy !req
135. I understand you want people
to like you moreCopy !req
136. and think you're cool.Copy !req
137. Is that right?Copy !req
138. Alright, well, let's see
how this brand works for you.Copy !req
139. We got... Kyle... Rugged. Vegan.
Compassionate. Victim.Copy !req
140. I... I don't think
that's really me.Copy !req
141. Well, that's fine 'cause
there's a lot of differentCopy !req
142. brands people are attracted to.
How about this one?Copy !req
143. Kyle... Sensitive. Outdoorsy.
Frugal. Victim.Copy !req
144. I'm not...
I'm not that outdoorsy.Copy !req
145. Okay, well,
remember there, Kyle,Copy !req
146. it's not so much about
who you are as much as it isCopy !req
147. about what people
are attracted to, okay?Copy !req
148. So let's see, how about this?Copy !req
149. Kyle... Wealthy. Handsome.Copy !req
150. Multi-talented
Grammy Award-Winning. Victim.Copy !req
151. Oh, that... that one's
taken already.Copy !req
152. Sorry. Hold on.Copy !req
153. Just a minute, Kyle.Copy !req
154. We're gonna find
a good one here for you.Copy !req
155. You'll see, Kyle.Copy !req
156. When you have your brand up
and runnin, 'Copy !req
157. no one can stop you.Copy !req
158. Look at this town.
There's just something about it.Copy !req
159. Oh, darling.
I think this might be the place.Copy !req
160. You really think so?Copy !req
161. It's so quiet and empty here.Copy !req
162. If we moved here,
then people would thinkCopy !req
163. we're really serious
about wanting to be normal.Copy !req
164. It does seem perfect,
doesn't it?Copy !req
165. We can have a fresh start here.Copy !req
166. Lead a normal life
and have babies.Copy !req
167. Can we? Can we really move here
and finally have our privacy?Copy !req
168. My love, I will do anything
for your privacy.Copy !req
169. The couch goes
in the first room!Copy !req
170. Ay, be careful
with that TV, buddy!Copy !req
171. Drum set goes
on the second floor.Copy !req
172. Wait. Put it down.Copy !req
173. I want to make sure
it isn't damaged.Copy !req
174. What the hell?Copy !req
175. Hey!
Hey, you!Copy !req
176. Hey, what are you looking at?Copy !req
177. You ever heard of privacy?Copy !req
178. What?Copy !req
179. You guys, I am so sorry.Copy !req
180. I totally was going to play
with you guys onlineCopy !req
181. but the Prince of Canada
and his wifeCopy !req
182. moved in across
the street from me.Copy !req
183. They have this huge jet
parked in front of my houseCopy !req
184. and then they kept trying to
get me to buy their stupid bookCopy !req
185. and... and, anyway, I'm sorry
I messed up another game night.Copy !req
186. It's okay, dude,
we had a great time.Copy !req
187. Yeah, we are literally
dripping with drip.Copy !req
188. Well, I just want
you guys to knowCopy !req
189. that I am a reliable,
fun-loving, punctual victim.Copy !req
190. 'Kay, well,
we gotta get to class.Copy !req
191. I'm really working on myself!Copy !req
192. You're gonna like what you see!Copy !req
193. As a child, you see the world
in a different way.Copy !req
194. You see the wonder in nature,
and you're starting to learnCopy !req
195. more about yourself
all the time.Copy !req
196. And you're learning that
there's something more importantCopy !req
197. than you ever thought...
Your brand.Copy !req
198. It's what defines you.Copy !req
199. And with brand management,
you can make sureCopy !req
200. others see you
the way they want to see you.Copy !req
201. Welcome to your
CumHammer Work tutorial.Copy !req
202. You are taking the first steps
to making your brandCopy !req
203. a great one.Copy !req
204. By now you've received
your workbookCopy !req
205. and also your brand slide toolCopy !req
206. and CumHammer social-media driveCopy !req
207. which will be used
in this video.Copy !req
208. Now, if you're ready,
let's start the exercisesCopy !req
209. on page five of your workbook.Copy !req
210. Yeah!Copy !req
211. Respect our privacy!Copy !req
212. Leave us alone!Copy !req
213. Down with the monarchy!Copy !req
214. We just want our privacy!Copy !req
215. God, fuck these people!Copy !req
216. Why are we so mad today?Copy !req
217. Because we want our privacy!Copy !req
218. Park County Police Station.
What's your emergency?Copy !req
219. Yeah, the neighbors across the
street are setting off fireworksCopy !req
220. and it's
10:30 at night!Copy !req
221. Oh, is it the Prince of Canada
and his wife,Copy !req
222. who just want to be left alone?Copy !req
223. Yes.Copy !req
224. They're being super loud, and
I'm trying to work on my brand!Copy !req
225. Oh, God damn it.Copy !req
226. Now the prince
is playing polo on the lawn!Copy !req
227. We are here because privacy
is a basic human right.Copy !req
228. How many more princes
and his wivesCopy !req
229. have to live in this nightmare?Copy !req
230. Hey, can you two
fucking keep it down?Copy !req
231. Oy!Copy !req
232. You ever heard of a thing
called "privacy"?Copy !req
233. Yeah, nobody gives a shit.Copy !req
234. Will you two just shut up,
and go away?Copy !req
235. It seriously is
driving me crazy!Copy !req
236. The prince plays drums all day.
I don't think he even has a job.Copy !req
237. And I don't know what the hell
she does.Copy !req
238. Why they even left Canada
is beyond me.Copy !req
239. And, like, she seems to just
boss him around,Copy !req
240. and make him do
whatever she wants.Copy !req
241. I mean, why did they even
leave CanadaCopy !req
242. and move to South Park, anyway?Copy !req
243. Stan, are you gonna
say something?Copy !req
244. You say it.Copy !req
245. Say what?Copy !req
246. Look, Kyle...Copy !req
247. We just kinda don't care
about some dumb princeCopy !req
248. and his stupid wife.Copy !req
249. I don't care about them either!Copy !req
250. So, then why do you talk
about them all the time?Copy !req
251. Dude, we're just kind of
sick of hearing about them.Copy !req
252. I'm sick of hearing about them!Copy !req
253. But I can't get away from them!Copy !req
254. They're everywhere!
In my fucking face!Copy !req
255. Yeah, and now you're putting 'em
in our fucking face.Copy !req
256. Fine, I won't talk
about them anymore.Copy !req
257. Thank you.Copy !req
258. Okay, just one last thing...
Did you know the prince sleeps-Copy !req
259. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry!Copy !req
260. The problem with you is you
want results without the work.Copy !req
261. You can't just say
you're a certain thing,Copy !req
262. and then expect people
to just like your brand.Copy !req
263. You gotta work it,
sell people on it.Copy !req
264. But I just don't feel
like my brandCopy !req
265. is who I really am
on the inside.Copy !req
266. You know, Kyle,
some people thinkCopy !req
267. it's what's inside you
that matters.Copy !req
268. But people can't see inside you.Copy !req
269. They can only see what kind of
drink you're drinking.Copy !req
270. That's what matters.Copy !req
271. I guess so.Copy !req
272. Now, I'm gonna help you
with a new brand,Copy !req
273. but you've got to work on it.Copy !req
274. What do you want your friends
to think about you?Copy !req
275. I want them to think I'm not
gonna complain about things,Copy !req
276. I'm more thick-skinned.Copy !req
277. Okay. This is good.
This is good.Copy !req
278. And I want people to think
I'm stronger, mentally,Copy !req
279. than I probably am.Copy !req
280. Okay. Okay.
I think we got it.Copy !req
281. People are gonna love this.Copy !req
282. Kyle... he's a thick-skinned,
super cool,Copy !req
283. nothing bothers him victim.Copy !req
284. I just don't know if I can...Copy !req
285. You're goin' off brand already!Copy !req
286. Remember, no matter what,
nothing bothers you.Copy !req
287. I don't care.
Don't care.Copy !req
288. What the hell?
What'd he just say?Copy !req
289. He victimized me!Copy !req
290. It's because I'm
an ethnic woman!Copy !req
291. He can't do that!
I'll see...Copy !req
292. Wait, you're ethnic?
This is an outrage!Copy !req
293. We'll just see how he deals
with my blue penis!Copy !req
294. Hey!Copy !req
295. Have some respect
for this privacy!Copy !req
296. Don't worry, my love,Copy !req
297. he's not gonna
get away with this.Copy !req
298. Hey, guys!
How you doin?Copy !req
299. Good.
How are you?Copy !req
300. I'm great.
Got some good sleep last night.Copy !req
301. Just letting' things roll
right off my back, you know?Copy !req
302. 'Cause that's the kind of guy
I am.Copy !req
303. Cool.Copy !req
304. Hey, do you guys wanna play
Darktide after school?Copy !req
305. Or if not, whatever.
I'm cool either way.Copy !req
306. Yeah, I'm sure we can
figure that out.Copy !req
307. Cool. Whatever.
I'm care-free and unflappable.Copy !req
308. I'll catch you guys at lunch!Copy !req
309. Wow, Kyle,
you seem really different.Copy !req
310. Do you like it?Copy !req
311. Uh, Sure.Copy !req
312. Thanks, Jimmy.Copy !req
313. But you know, I really need
to thank a good friend.Copy !req
314. He introduced me to a way of
becoming a more stable person.Copy !req
315. Have you seen Butters?Copy !req
316. Butters?
Oh, sure.Copy !req
317. He's out on the playground,Copy !req
318. getting the shit
beat out of him by Bebe.Copy !req
319. What?Copy !req
320. Mother! Fucker!Copy !req
321. Don't ever say that shit again!Copy !req
322. Hey!
Whoa, whoa, whoa.Copy !req
323. What the hell is going on?Copy !req
324. I wasn't even doing anything,
and he came up,Copy !req
325. and started talking shit to me!Copy !req
326. Yeah, everyone likes a guy
that's strong and assertive,Copy !req
327. so I told Bebe
to go fuck herself.Copy !req
328. Who do you even think you are?Copy !req
329. You want some more of this,
you dumb slut?Copy !req
330. Butters, what are you doing?Copy !req
331. This isn't you.Copy !req
332. Hey, Kyle, will you relax.Copy !req
333. You're kind of fucking up
my brand.Copy !req
334. Okay, that does it...
Come on, Butters.Copy !req
335. You're going back to CumHammer.Copy !req
336. You're lucky he saved your ass!Copy !req
337. Fuck you, you fucking bitch!Copy !req
338. The most important thing about
your brand is being flexible.Copy !req
339. We want to make sure
you're completely satisfied.Copy !req
340. You say you're having
some problems?Copy !req
341. That's right!Copy !req
342. There's this horrible spyCopy !req
343. who lives
across the street from us,Copy !req
344. and we're gonna get him back
by changing our brand!Copy !req
345. All right.Copy !req
346. And I do see
you're in our database,Copy !req
347. but you didn't first get help
at this CumHammer location?Copy !req
348. No.Copy !req
349. My wife went to one
in California as a child.Copy !req
350. Ah. Okay.Copy !req
351. Then you must be in
the national system.Copy !req
352. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Is this you?Copy !req
353. "Sorority girl, Actress,
Influencer, Victim."Copy !req
354. Yeah.
That's totally me.Copy !req
355. Okay. I see.Copy !req
356. And then, you added your husbandCopy !req
357. to your Friends and Family account.Copy !req
358. You must be the
"Royal prince, millionaire,Copy !req
359. world traveler,
victim."Copy !req
360. That's right.Copy !req
361. Come on, Butters.Copy !req
362. Hello?Copy !req
363. Oh, hey there.
Just gimme a minute.Copy !req
364. I'm with some other clients
right now, there, Kyle.Copy !req
365. Uh, no.
This is an emergency.Copy !req
366. We need to talk to...Copy !req
367. Oy! Do you mind!
Stop invading...Copy !req
368. It's him!Copy !req
369. What the hell
are you doing here?Copy !req
370. You just can't
leave us alone, can you!Copy !req
371. Oh, my God,
he's so obsessed with us.Copy !req
372. I'm not obsessed with you.Copy !req
373. It's this stupid place!Copy !req
374. Don't you see, Butters?Copy !req
375. Teaching people
to think of their brandCopy !req
376. just makes
more people like them.Copy !req
377. This whole thing is wrong.Copy !req
378. They're telling you guys to
reduce yourselves into productsCopy !req
379. instead of people to be truly
understood and loved.Copy !req
380. Don't you guys want people
to like you for youCopy !req
381. instead of who they
want you to be?Copy !req
382. Look, we all have our faults.
God knows I do.Copy !req
383. But if we just try to present
and control an image of usCopy !req
384. for people to see, then,
we're just performersCopy !req
385. instead of human beings.Copy !req
386. He's right.Copy !req
387. Trying to make ourselves
into a brandCopy !req
388. just turned us into products.Copy !req
389. We don't need to be
a brand, do we?Copy !req
390. If it's truly what we want,Copy !req
391. then we really can
get away from it all.Copy !req
392. No more magazines
and Netflix shows.Copy !req
393. We really can
live a normal life.Copy !req
394. Yes, I'm sure you agree, darling.Copy !req
395. We can be the people
we talked about being,Copy !req
396. with no more worries
about how we lookCopy !req
397. or the image
we project to people.Copy !req
398. What matters is what
we have on the inside.Copy !req
399. Hello?Copy !req
400. Come on, Butters.
Time to go home.Copy !req
401. Yeah.Copy !req
402. - Yeah.
- Yeah.Copy !req
403. Now, hey.Copy !req
404. Don't make a decision
you might all regret.Copy !req
405. Yeah, come on, honey.
We don't need this place.Copy !req
406. Honey?Copy !req
407. The queen is dead.Copy !req
408. What a sad day for Canada...
And therefore, the world.Copy !req
409. Ike, I need to use the...Copy !req
410. Oh no, not again.Copy !req
411. She's still dead.Copy !req
412. Ike, I have to get on
the computer.Copy !req
413. The Queen's been dead
a long time.Copy !req
414. Ike, I have to get on
with my friends!Copy !req
415. If I don't,
they're gonna think I'm...Copy !req
416. It's okay.Copy !req
417. Things get to you.Copy !req
418. It's who you are.Copy !req
419. Oh. Hey, guys.Copy !req
420. Hey, dude. Uh...Copy !req
421. We thought maybe you could do
with a little outside time.Copy !req
422. Really?Copy !req
423. We just thought it'd be good
to get you out of the house.Copy !req
424. You seem to bee going through
a lot lately.Copy !req
425. Yeah.
Yeah, I have.Copy !req
426. Thanks, guys.
I'd love to play.Copy !req
427. Oy! Oy!Copy !req
428. Could, uh...Copy !req
429. Could I play?Copy !req
430. Sure.
You can play.Copy !req
431. Great!Copy !req
432. >>oakislandtk<<<<<
www.opensubtitles.orgCopy !req