1. Episode 11x12
"Imaginationland Episode III"Copy !req
2. I'm going out to South Park
gonna have myself a timeCopy !req
3. Friendly faces everywhere
humble folks without temptationCopy !req
4. I'm goin out to south park
gonna leave my woes behindCopy !req
5. Ample parking day or night
people spouting howdy neighborCopy !req
6. I'm heading out to south park
to see if I cant unwindCopy !req
7. I like girls with big fat titties
really big fat tittiesCopy !req
8. So come on out to south park
and meet some friends of mineCopy !req
9. Imaginationland used to be a happy place.Copy !req
10. But then the terrorists attacked.
And so many of us were killed.Copy !req
11. The Barrier came down and all the most
evil imaginary characters were unleashed.Copy !req
12. Now our final battle will take place.Copy !req
13. The evil characters are marching toward us.Copy !req
14. With the intent to wipe us all out.Copy !req
15. This is gonna be fun, huh?Copy !req
16. We prepare for a battle we cannot win.Copy !req
17. Sweet and cuddely imagninary characters,Copy !req
18. many who have never held a weapon,
must now fight for their very lives.Copy !req
19. We are too few in number,
but we have one hope.Copy !req
20. That is where you come in, young boy.
Only you can help us win this battle.Copy !req
21. What can I do?Copy !req
22. You have a power here
that you have yet to understand.Copy !req
23. Episode IIICopy !req
24. Help!Copy !req
25. Back it up!Copy !req
26. Look!
Right there!Copy !req
27. See that?Copy !req
28. Help!Copy !req
29. What does that look like to you?Copy !req
30. It's ManBearPig!Copy !req
31. I told you it was real!
Look again!Copy !req
32. There! half man, half bear, and half pig!
Do you see it?Copy !req
33. Yes, we see it, Mr. Gore.Copy !req
34. Something big is going on and the American
people need to know what! I'm off!Copy !req
35. Washington D.C.
Memorial HospitalCopy !req
36. He's recovering, but there's been
some trauma to his brain.Copy !req
37. The boy says he's been hearing
imaginary voices.Copy !req
38. Hello?Copy !req
39. Hello? Anybody?Copy !req
40. Stan?Copy !req
41. Hello?Copy !req
42. Stan?Copy !req
43. Good morning, Kyle. How are we feeling?
- Cartman, what's happened?Copy !req
44. What's happened?
Well, let's see:Copy !req
45. You bet me that I couldn't prove
that leprechauns were real.Copy !req
46. And if I could prove it,
you had to suck my balls, I believe.Copy !req
47. No, I mean what happened at the Pentagon?
- You just rest, Kyle.Copy !req
48. Look what I made for you. A sundae.Copy !req
49. It has hot fudge and whipped cream
and a cherry.Copy !req
50. But I feel like something
is missing don't you, Kyle?Copy !req
51. What else belongs on a sundae besides
hot fudge and whipped cream, let's see.Copy !req
52. Hot fudge, whipped cream,
what else belongs on a sundae, Kyle?Copy !req
53. What else goes on a sundae besides
hot fudge, whipped cream, and...Copy !req
54. Oh, that's right!
My balls!Copy !req
55. Cartman, what is going on out there?
What happened to Stan?Copy !req
56. Oh, he got sucked through that portal thing
and they're gonna nuke it now.Copy !req
57. So are you all set for
your big photo shoot, Kyle?Copy !req
58. Wait, what do you mean?
Stan's in danger?Copy !req
59. Don't try to change the subject, Kyle.Copy !req
60. You've done a really good job of getting out
of this bet, but it's finally time to settle.Copy !req
61. Get ready for your sundae, Kyle.
With extra nuts.Copy !req
62. Aslan, the evil characters are almost here!Copy !req
63. Get everyone to the battlefield!
Defend the castle walls!Copy !req
64. Quickly young boy, we need your powers now!Copy !req
65. What powers? I don't understand.
- You are real. You are a creator.Copy !req
66. That means you can imagine things
into existence here.Copy !req
67. I can?Copy !req
68. Santa Claus was killed in the terrorist attack.Copy !req
69. The first thing we need is for you
to bring him back.Copy !req
70. How?
- You just have to focus your mind.Copy !req
71. Imagine Santa and nothing else.Copy !req
72. How am I supposed to focus with
all this crap going on?Copy !req
73. Think only of one thing.
Imagine it. Believe in it.Copy !req
74. Whatever is most prominent in your mind
will come to be.Copy !req
75. Butters! You are grounded, mister!
You hear me?Copy !req
76. Grounded!Copy !req
77. No, no, no!Copy !req
78. What are you doing? We need Santa!
- I'm trying!Copy !req
79. Come on, kid, imagine Santa!
Believe in Santa!Copy !req
80. You must believe in Santa!
- Believe in Santa! Right now!Copy !req
81. Kevin, can I get some more bounce off that
too, okay? Let's just go with a 5 6 8 split.Copy !req
82. Cartman, will you shut up? I'm trying
to find out what's going on.Copy !req
83. A new terrorist attack seems to have
taken place. This time, in our imagination.Copy !req
84. Al Gore brought this video to
the public's attention,Copy !req
85. sparking demands by everyone who
wants to know exactly what's going on.Copy !req
86. We were hoping to keep this quiet
until it was all over,Copy !req
87. but, two days ago there was
a terrorist attack on our imagination,Copy !req
88. and now our imaginations are running wild.Copy !req
89. Our imaginations are running wild
and we weren't told?Copy !req
90. By attacking our imagination the terrorists
have found our most vulnerable spot.Copy !req
91. And we've determined that the best course
of action is to nuke our imagination.Copy !req
92. Is nuking our imagination really prudent?Copy !req
93. Aren't there other, more peaceful ways
to get our imagination under control?Copy !req
94. Couldn't we trying sending
Kurt Russell into a portalCopy !req
95. to our imagination to try
and reason with the-Copy !req
96. We tried that! And Kurt Russell
was raped by Christmas Critters!Copy !req
97. Ouch.Copy !req
98. The Pentagon claims that because
imaginary things are not real,Copy !req
99. the military doesn't need Senate
approval to nuke them.Copy !req
100. That's bullcrap, man!
You can't nuke our imagination!Copy !req
101. Don't nuke our imagination bro!Copy !req
102. Mike, does the military have
the authority to nuke our imagination?Copy !req
103. Clearly they don't, Steven
and they're gonna have a big problem,Copy !req
104. because state government has already set
a precedent that imaginary characters are real.Copy !req
105. I cite a famous case of Cartman v Broflovski.Copy !req
106. In which a U.S. found for the plaintiff
who saw a leprechaun.Copy !req
107. Yes, I believe the defendant had to suck
the plaintiff's balls in that case.Copy !req
108. That's right, Steven, yeah.Copy !req
109. Oh for the love of God!Copy !req
110. Hello? Can anybody hear me?Copy !req
111. Stan! Dude, is that you?Copy !req
112. Kyle? Where are you? I don't see you.Copy !req
113. No, I'm not there. I'm at a hospital.
I'm hearing you in my imagination.Copy !req
114. Oh that makes sense.Copy !req
115. Dude, what's happening?Copy !req
116. I'm in like a gumdrop forest.Copy !req
117. I just saw Strawberry Shortcake tied up
and dead with pee in her eye.Copy !req
118. Wait, hang on. I think something
really big is about to go down.Copy !req
119. The evil characters are here.
- There are so many of them.Copy !req
120. There's no time left! You have
to get control of your imagination,Copy !req
121. and bring Santa back now!Copy !req
122. Santa. Santa.Copy !req
123. Think. Jolly old Santa.
Red suit, white beard.Copy !req
124. Red suit, white beard. Santa!Copy !req
125. How does that look? Can you see my balls
and the sundae in frame?Copy !req
126. A shocking new development in
the nuking of imagination!Copy !req
127. The Supreme Court has ruled with the military
that imaginary things are officially not real,Copy !req
128. and therefore no approval is needed
to nuke them.Copy !req
129. Thank you.
- Oh no.Copy !req
130. This of course overturns any
imagination-based verdicts in the past,Copy !req
131. including the famous Cartman
v Broflovski ballsucking case.Copy !req
132. What?Copy !req
133. So it appears the military is ready
to proceed with its operation,Copy !req
134. one they are calling "Operation Nuke the
Imagination Through the Imagination Doorway."Copy !req
135. Kyle? What's happening?Copy !req
136. The government is gonna nuke Imaginationland.
- What? You can't let them do that!Copy !req
137. What am I supposed to do?
- Dude you have to stall them!Copy !req
138. What is that? Hey!
Get out of here! Leave me alone!Copy !req
139. Stan?Copy !req
140. Where are you going?Copy !req
141. I'm going to try to save Stan
and Butters from getting nuked!Copy !req
142. Okay, but you you have
to suck my balls first real quick.Copy !req
143. No, I don't! The decision was overturned.Copy !req
144. We had a deal, Kyle!
- Yeah, that leprechauns were real!Copy !req
145. And the government just declared they
aren't technically real, so I was right!Copy !req
146. It's over! I don't have to suck your balls!Copy !req
147. It isn't over!Copy !req
148. It isn't over, Kyle!Copy !req
149. I have not waited this long to see
you weasel your way out of this bet!Copy !req
150. Go ahead and go. But I swear on my life!Copy !req
151. Before this day is over!
You, will, suck my balls!Copy !req
152. I swear it!Copy !req
153. We need more spinach for Popeye!Copy !req
154. I got one. I got him.
- Hey there.Copy !req
155. We're losing the battle!
There are simply too many of them!Copy !req
156. Then the day is lost.
- Wait! Aslan, look!Copy !req
157. What? What happened?
- You did it, kid!Copy !req
158. Quickly Santa!
They need you on the battlefield!Copy !req
159. Oh, all right.Copy !req
160. Make way for Santa!Copy !req
161. Now you see your potential, young creator.Copy !req
162. But there is still much more we need
from you if we are to win this day!Copy !req
163. This area is restricted, little boy.Copy !req
164. Please, I need to talk to the people inside.
They can't set off that nuke.Copy !req
165. Get behind the line with the other protesters!Copy !req
166. No nukes in our imagination, bro!Copy !req
167. You don't understand! My friend is in
Imaginationland! I can hear him in my head!Copy !req
168. You pot-smoking hippies aren't
getting through here, so back off!Copy !req
169. Stop that nuke!
- Stop that nuke!Copy !req
170. Stop that nuke!Copy !req
171. What's going on here?Copy !req
172. The military has to do this!
It's their only way to kill ManBearPig.Copy !req
173. Good, Butters. Now imagine some
more archers on the castle walls!Copy !req
174. Aslan! We're losing the battle!Copy !req
175. We managed to fight off the vampires
and werewolves, but...Copy !req
176. now our troops are being shot down
by the Cavity Creeps.Copy !req
177. Cavity Creeps?Copy !req
178. We make holes in teeth!Copy !req
179. What can destroy the Cavity Creeps?
- Only Crest Gel with Tartar Control.Copy !req
180. Quickly! You must imagine a giant Crest Gel!Copy !req
181. Yes!Copy !req
182. His powers are getting stronger.
We might just have a chance here.Copy !req
183. Aslan, we've captured a spy!
He was sneaking around the Gumdrop Forest!Copy !req
184. Stan!
Hey look, I imagined Stan here!Copy !req
185. No, no! I got sucked through Operation
Imagination Doorway at the Pentagon.Copy !req
186. Project Imagination Doorway?Copy !req
187. Nevermind! The battle is almost won!
We can deal with him later.Copy !req
188. No, you don't understand. There's a nuke.Copy !req
189. The government is about to level
this entire place.Copy !req
190. What?
- Why would they nuke Imaginationland?Copy !req
191. So the terrorists can't ever use
it against us again.Copy !req
192. We can get Imaginationland under control.
The Chosen One just needs more time!Copy !req
193. The Chosen One?
- Yeah, it turns out I'm the Key.Copy !req
194. Missile launch sequence initiated.Copy !req
195. All right, people,
I want this nuking done by the books.Copy !req
196. Sir, we have a security breach!
- What?Copy !req
197. There's an Unauthorized Entry Alert, sir.
It's coming from Sector Two!Copy !req
198. Sector 2?Copy !req
199. What the hell do you think you're doing
declaring leprechauns aren't real?Copy !req
200. What?Copy !req
201. You just can't declare that imaginary things
aren't real! Who are you to say what's real?Copy !req
202. Think about it: is blue real?
Is love really real?Copy !req
203. Imaginary things are things made up
by people, like Santa and Rudolph.Copy !req
204. Yeah and they detract from real things,
like Jesus.Copy !req
205. Maybe Jesus is imaginary too.
- You'd better not say that! You'll go to hell!Copy !req
206. It's possible that hell is also imaginary.
- So then, we're about to nuke hell...Copy !req
207. That's a good thing, right?Copy !req
208. Hell yeah, that's a good thing, yeah.Copy !req
209. What if heaven is imaginary?
We'd be nuking heaven.Copy !req
210. Yeah, but it wouldn't be real.
- So it'd be all right.Copy !req
211. Look, maybe they're all part of the same
thing. Santa, Jesus, hell and leprechauns.Copy !req
212. Maybe they're all real in the same way, right?Copy !req
213. Santa Claus and leprechauns are imaginary,
but Jesus and hell are real!Copy !req
214. Well then, what about Buddha?
- Well of course he's imaginary!Copy !req
215. Aw, see? Now you're being intolerant, Tom.
- Am I real?Copy !req
216. All right, enough! Keep that kid out of the
way and let's get back to the nuking at hand!Copy !req
217. No! Leprechauns are real, Goddamnit!Copy !req
218. Kyle?Copy !req
219. Kyle, what happened?Copy !req
220. Nothing.
- What?Copy !req
221. Nothing happened!
There's nothing I can do!Copy !req
222. Dude, you can't let the government
fire off that nuke!Copy !req
223. They say they can do whatever they want
because imaginary things aren't real!Copy !req
224. Well you have to convince them they are real!Copy !req
225. No way, dude, then I'd have
to suck Cartman's balls.Copy !req
226. Whatever it takes,
you have to do it, all right?Copy !req
227. Hang on, Kyle, Jesus wants to talk to you.Copy !req
228. Hello, Kyle? This is Jesus.
- Oh boy...Copy !req
229. What seems to be the problem, my child?Copy !req
230. Jesus, I can't do anything. I'm just a fourth
grader going against the entire government.Copy !req
231. Hello? Jesus?Copy !req
232. No, hey Kyle, this is Luke Skywalker.Copy !req
233. Look, I know this seems like
an impossible task,Copy !req
234. but do you remember when
I brought down the Death Star.Copy !req
235. I mean, that seemed impossible too, right?Copy !req
236. Yeah, I guess.Copy !req
237. Okay, now hold on, because Superman
is here and he wants to say something.Copy !req
238. Kyle, this is Superman.
- Hi Superman.Copy !req
239. I know that saving people can
be a big responsibility,Copy !req
240. but no matter what it takes, it's worth it.
- I know.Copy !req
241. You can do this, Kyle. Now hang on,
because Hercules wants to talk to you.Copy !req
242. Oh God.Copy !req
243. Yes, God is here too. He's gonna
talk to you right after Captain Crunch.Copy !req
244. Popeye, I need some help here!Copy !req
245. Popeye is being killed by Christmas Critters.Copy !req
246. Get off of me!Copy !req
247. Hey, what is that?Copy !req
248. More spinach for Popeye!Copy !req
249. Imagine an M60 for Jesus!Copy !req
250. All right!Copy !req
251. The boy is doing it!
Everything is going to be okay!Copy !req
252. Missile launch in one minute.Copy !req
253. Goddamnit, you stupid assholes
are going to ruin everything!Copy !req
254. Prepare for launch.
- Sir, we have a security breach!Copy !req
255. What?
- There's an Unauthorized Entry Alert.Copy !req
256. It's coming from Sector Two!
- Sector 2?Copy !req
257. Kyle?Copy !req
258. The hell are you doing back here?
- Listen, you don't have to do this!Copy !req
259. Our imaginations aren't running wild anymore.Copy !req
260. Why is it so easy for children to break
into the Pentagon?Copy !req
261. You have to stop!Copy !req
262. If I'm not mistaken, you're the one
who bet that leprechauns weren't real.Copy !req
263. So why do you care what happens?
- Because I...Copy !req
264. Because I think they are real.Copy !req
265. It's all real. Think about it.Copy !req
266. Haven't Luke Skywalker and Santa Claus
affected your livesCopy !req
267. more than most real people in this room?Copy !req
268. I mean, whether Jesus is real or not,Copy !req
269. he's had a bigger impact on the world
than any of us have.Copy !req
270. And the same could be said of Bugs Bunny
and Superman and Harry Potter.Copy !req
271. They've changed my life, changed
the way I act on the Earth.Copy !req
272. Doesn't that make them kind of "real."Copy !req
273. They might be imaginary, but they're
more important than most of us here.Copy !req
274. And they're all gonna be around
long after we're dead.Copy !req
275. So in a way, those things are
more realer than any of us.Copy !req
276. Abort the sequence.Copy !req
277. So Kyle, imaginary things are real, huh?
Guess that means I did win the bet after all.Copy !req
278. And you know what that means, Kyle.Copy !req
279. Just let it go with your fucking balls,
you fucking asshole!Copy !req
280. Your friends have been in danger
and all you care about it this stupid bet!Copy !req
281. Well I've decided, Cartman,
even if we had a bet,Copy !req
282. that I am never sucking your balls,
you got that?Copy !req
283. They can throw me in jail for
the rest of my life,Copy !req
284. but I am never going to suck
your balls, never! So there!Copy !req
285. What happened?
Why hasn't the missile gone off?Copy !req
286. There's been an abort, Mr. Gore.
- No! ManBearPig has to die!Copy !req
287. Oh Jesus no!Copy !req
288. That's it, Aslan!
The evil characters have fled!Copy !req
289. The day is ours!Copy !req
290. Kyle!
- Fellas! Where'd you come from?Copy !req
291. What is that?Copy !req
292. He did it!Copy !req
293. Oh look, I'm back!Copy !req
294. Nice going, kid.Copy !req
295. The evil characters!
They're all behind the wall again.Copy !req
296. Dude! How did you do that, Butters?
- Well I just used my imagination.Copy !req
297. You know, I really have learned a lot,
you guys.Copy !req
298. What Kyle said about imaginary things
being real and Butters using his imagination?Copy !req
299. It makes me think that well maybe we all
have the power to make things a reality.Copy !req
300. Oh why look, it's me.
And...Copy !req
301. And there's Kyle.
And what's Kyle about to do?Copy !req
302. Cartman, don't!Copy !req
303. Oh Kyle! What are you doing to my balls?
Oh, look! It's Kyle sucking my balls!Copy !req
304. Dude.
- Oh my God.Copy !req
305. Oh Kyle, you are gobbling those balls,
aren't you?Copy !req
306. I told you you would suck my balls
before this was over, didn't I, Kyle?Copy !req
307. I'm not sucking your balls, that's imaginary!Copy !req
308. No, Kyle, I believe you said
that imaginary things are real.Copy !req
309. That's true. You did.Copy !req
310. Oh, look at you go, Kyle!
Oh, you dirty girl! You love those balls.Copy !req
311. Okay, Kyle, that's enough ballsucking.
We need to get you boys home.Copy !req
312. I am not sucking Cartman's balls!
- Whatever you imagine to be real, is real.Copy !req
313. Butters? Butters!Copy !req
314. What?Copy !req
315. It was all just a dream.Copy !req
316. Come on, Butters, time to get up.
- Oh Dad! I had the craziest dream!Copy !req
317. I saved all of Imaginationland from
running wild after a terrorist attack!Copy !req
318. You were in Imaginationland, Butters!
We've read all about it in the paper!Copy !req
319. The question is,
what were you doing in ImaginationlandCopy !req
320. when you were supposed to be helping
your mother clean up the basement?Copy !req
321. You are grounded, mister!Copy !req
322. Wait, I'm not grounded.
- Oh yes you are!Copy !req
323. Oh yeah?Copy !req
324. That only works in Imaginationland!
You're grounded!Copy !req
325. Ah, shit.Copy !req