1. I'm going down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time,
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2. Friendly faces everywhere,
humble folks without temptation,
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3. I'm going down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind,
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4. Ample parking day or night,
people spouting howdy neighbor,
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5. I'm heading out to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind,
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6. I like girls with big vagina,
I like girls with big fat titties,
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7. So come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine,
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8. Imaginationland
used to be a happy place.
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9. But then the terrorists attacked.
And so many of us were killed.
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10. The Barrier came down
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11. and all the most evil imaginary
characters were unleashed.
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12. Now our final battle
will take place.
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13. The evil characters
are marching toward us.
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14. With the intent
to wipe us all out.
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15. This is
gonna be fun, huh?
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16. We prepare for a battle
we cannot win.
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17. Sweet and cuddly
imagninary characters,
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18. many who have never held a weapon,
must now fight for their very lives.
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19. We are too few in number,
but we have one hope.
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20. That is where you come in, young boy.
Only you can help us win this battle.
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21. What can I do?
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22. You have a power here
that you have yet to understand.
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23. Help!
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24. Back it up!
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25. Look!
Right there!
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26. See that?
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27. Help!
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28. What does that
look like to you?
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29. It's man-bear pig!
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30. I told you it was real!
Look again!
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31. There! Half man,
half bear, and half pig!
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32. Do you see it?
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33. Yes, we see it, Mr. Gore.
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34. Something big is going on
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35. and the American people
need to know what! I'm off!
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36. He is recovering, but there's been
some trauma to his brain.
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37. The boy says he's been hearing
imaginary voices.
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38. Hello?
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39. Hello? Anybody?
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40. Stan?
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41. Hello?
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42. Stan?
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43. Good morning, Kyle.
How are we feeling?
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44. Cartman, what's happened?
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45. What's happened?
Well, let's see:
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46. You bet me that I couldn't prove
leprechauns were real.
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47. And if I could prove it,
you had to suck my balls, I believe.
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48. No, I mean what happened
at the Pentagon?
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49. You just rest, Kyle.
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50. Look what I made for you.
A sundae.
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51. It has hot fudge and whipped cream
and a cherry.
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52. But I feel like something
is missing. Don't you, Kyle?
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53. What else belongs on a sundae besides
hot fudge and whipped cream.
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54. Hot fudge, whipped cream.
What else belongs on a sundae, Kyle?
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55. What else goes on a sundae besides
hot fudge, whipped cream, and...
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56. Oh, that's right!
My balls!
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57. Cartman, what is going on out there?
What happened to Stan?
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58. Oh, he got sucked
through that portal thing
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59. and they're gonna
nuke it now.
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60. So are you all set for
your big photo shoot, Kyle?
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61. Wait, what do you mean?
Stan's in danger?
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62. Don't try
to change the subject, Kyle.
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63. You've done a really good job
of trying to get out of this bet,
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64. but it's finally time
to settle.
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65. Get ready for your sundae, Kyle.
With extra nuts.
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66. Aslan, the evil characters
are almost here!
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67. Get everyone to the battlefield!
Defend the castle walls!
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68. Quickly, young boy.
We need your powers now!
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69. - What powers? I don't understand.
- You are real. You are a Creator.
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70. That means you can imagine things
into existence here.
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71. I—I can?
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72. Santa Claus was killed
in the terrorist attack.
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73. The first thing we need is for you
to bring him back.
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74. How?
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75. You just have
to focus your mind.
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76. Imagine Santa
and nothing else.
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77. How am I supposed to focus
with all this crap going on?
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78. Think only of one thing.
Imagine it. Believe in it.
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79. Whatever is most prominent
in your mind will come to be.
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80. Butters! You are grounded, mister!
You hear me?
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81. Grounded!
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82. No, no, no!
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83. - What are you doing? We need Santa!
- I'm trying!
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84. Come on, kid, imagine Santa!
Believe in Santa!
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85. - You must believe in Santa!
- Believe in Santa! Right now!
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86. Kevin, can I get some
more bounce off that too, okay?
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87. Let's just go
with a 5 6 8 split.
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88. Cartman, will you shut up?
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89. I'm trying to find out
what's going on.
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90. A new terrorist attack
seems to have taken place.
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91. This time,
in our imagination.
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92. Al Gore brought this video to
the public's attention,
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93. sparking demands by everyone who
wants to know exactly what's going on.
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94. We were hoping to keep this quiet
until it was all over,
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95. but, two days ago, there was
a terrorist attack on our imagination,
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96. and now our imaginations
are running wild.
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97. Our imaginations are running wild
and we weren't told?
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98. By attacking our imagination,
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99. the terrorists have found
our most vulnerable spot.
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100. And we've determined that
the best course of action
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101. is to nuke our imagination.
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102. Is nuking our imagination
really prudent?
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103. Aren't there other more peaceful ways
to get our imagination under control?
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104. Couldn't we trying sending
Kurt Russell into a portal
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105. to our imagination to try
and reason with the—
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106. We tried that! And Kurt Russell
was raped by Christmas Critters!
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107. Ouch.
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108. The Pentagon claims that because
imaginary things are not real,
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109. the military doesn't need Senate
approval to nuke them.
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110. That's bullcrap, man!
You can't nuke our imagination!
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111. Don't nuke
our imagination, bro!
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112. Mike, does the military have
the authority to nuke our imagination?
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113. Clearly they don't, Steven,
and they're gonna have a big problem,
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114. because state government
has already set
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115. a precedent that imaginary
characters are real.
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116. I cite a famous court case
of Cartman v. Broflovski,
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117. in which a U.S. found for the plaintiff
who saw a leprechaun.
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118. Yes, I believe the defendant had to suck
the plaintiff's balls in that case.
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119. That's right, Steven,
yeah.
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120. Oh for the love of God!
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121. Hello?
Can anybody hear me?
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122. Stan!
Dude, is that you?
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123. Kyle? Where are you?
I don't see you.
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124. No, I'm not there. I'm at a hospital.
I'm hearing you in my imagination.
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125. Oh that makes sense.
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126. Dude, what's happening?
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127. I'm in like
a gumdrop forest.
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128. I just saw Strawberry Shortcake tied up
and dead with pee in her eye.
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129. Wait, hang on. I think something
really big is about to go down.
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130. - The evil characters are here.
- Defend Castle Sunshine.
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131. There's no time left! You have
to get control of your imagination,
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132. and bring Santa back now!
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133. Santa. Santa.
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134. Think. Jolly old Santa.
Red suit, white beard.
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135. Red suit, white beard.
Santa!
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136. How does that look?
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137. Can you see my balls
and the sundae in frame?
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138. A shocking new development in
the nuking of imagination!
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139. The Supreme Court has ruled
with the military
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140. that imaginary things
are officially not real,
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141. and therefore no approval
is needed to nuke them.
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142. - Thank you.
- Oh no.
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143. This of course overturns any
imagination-based verdicts in the past,
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144. including the famous
Cartman v. Broflovski ballsucking case.
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145. What?
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146. So it appears the military is ready
to proceed with its operation,
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147. one they are calling
"Operation Nuke the Imagination
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148. "Through the Imagination Doorway."
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149. Kyle?
What's happening?
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150. The government is
gonna nuke Imaginationland.
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151. What? You can't
let them do that!
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152. - What am I supposed to do?
- Dude, you have to stall them!
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153. What is that? Hey!
Get out of here! Leave me alone!
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154. Stan? Stan?
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155. Where are you going?
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156. I'm going to try to save Stan
and Butters from getting nuked!
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157. Okay, okay, but you have
to suck my balls first real quick.
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158. No, I don't!
The decision was overturned.
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159. - We had a deal, Kyle!
- Yeah, that leprechauns were real!
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160. And the government just declared they
aren't technically real, so I was right!
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161. It's over! I don't have
to suck your balls!
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162. It isn't over!
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163. It isn't over, Kyle!
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164. I have not waited this long to see
you weasel your way out of this bet!
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165. Go ahead and go.
But I swear on my life!
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166. Before this day is over!
You will suck my balls!
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167. I swear it!
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168. We need more spinach
for Popeye.
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169. - I got one. I got him.
- Hey there.
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170. We're losing the battle!
There are simply too many of them!
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171. - Then the day is lost.
- Wait! Aslan, look!
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172. - What? What happened?
- You did it, kid!
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173. Quickly, Santa!
They need you on the battlefield!
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174. Oh, all right.
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175. Make way for Santa!
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176. Now you see your potential,
young Creator.
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177. But there is still much more we need
from you if we are to win this day!
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178. This area is restricted,
little boy.
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179. Please, I need to talk
to the people inside.
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180. They can't set off
that nuke.
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181. Get behind the line
with the other protesters.
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182. No nukes
in our imagination, bro!
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183. You don't understand!
My friend is in Imaginationland.
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184. I can hear him
in my head!
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185. You pot-smoking hippies aren't
getting through here, so back off!
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186. - Stop that nuke!
- Stop that nuke!
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187. Stop that nuke!
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188. What's going on here?
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189. The military
has to do this!
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190. It's their only way
to kill man-bear-pig.
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191. Good, Butters. Now imagine some
more archers on the castle walls!
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192. Aslan!
We're losing the battle!
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193. We managed to fight off the vampires
and werewolves, but...
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194. Now our troops are being shot down
by the Cavity Creeps.
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195. Cavity Creeps?
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196. We make holes in teeth!
We make holes in teeth!
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197. - What can destroy the Cavity Creeps?
- Only Crest Gel with Tartar Control.
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198. Quickly! You must imagine
a giant Crest Gel!
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199. Yes!
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200. His powers are getting stronger.
We might just have a chance here.
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201. Aslan, we've captured
a spy!
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202. He was sneaking around
the Gumdrop Forest!
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203. Stan!
Hey look, I imagined Stan here!
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204. No, no! I got sucked through Project
Imagination Doorway at the Pentagon.
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205. Project Imagination Doorway?
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206. Nevermind! The battle is almost won!
We can deal with him later.
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207. No, no, you don't understand.
There's a nuke.
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208. The government is about to level
this entire place.
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209. What?
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210. Why would they nuke
Imaginationland?
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211. So the terrorists can't ever
use it against us again.
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212. We can get Imaginationland
under control.
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213. The Chosen One
just needs more time!
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214. - The Chosen One?
- Yeah, it turns out I'm the Key.
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215. Missile launch sequence
initiated.
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216. All right, people,
I want this nuking done by the books.
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217. - Sir, we have a security breach!
- What?
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218. There's an Unauthorized Entry Alert, sir.
It's coming from sector two!
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219. Sector two?
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220. What the hell do you think you're doing,
declaring leprechauns aren't real?
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221. What?
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222. You just can't declare that
imaginary things aren't real!
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223. Who are you to say
what's real?
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224. Think about it: Is blue real?
Is love really real?
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225. Imaginary things are things made up
by people, like Santa and Rudolph.
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226. Yeah and they detract
from real things, like Jesus.
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227. Maybe Jesus
is imaginary too.
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228. Oh, you'd better not say that!
You'll go to Hell!
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229. It's possible that
Hell is also imaginary.
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230. So then,
we're about to nuke Hell...
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231. That's a good thing, right?
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232. Hell yeah,
that's a good thing, yeah.
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233. What if Heaven is imaginary?
We'd be nuking Heaven.
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234. - Yeah, but it wouldn't be real.
- So it'd be all right.
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235. Look, maybe they're all part
of the same thing.
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236. Santa and Jesus
and Hell and leprechauns.
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237. Maybe they're all real
in the same way, right?
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238. Santa Claus and leprechauns
are imaginary,
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239. but Jesus and Hell are real!
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240. - Well then, what about Buddha?
- Well of course, he's imaginary!
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241. Aw, see? Now you're being
intolerant, Tom.
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242. Am I real?
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243. All right, enough!
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244. Keep that kid out of the way and
let's get back to the nuking at hand!
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245. No! Leprechauns are real,
goddamnit!
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246. Kyle?
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247. Kyle, what happened?
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248. Nothing.
- What?
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249. Nothing happened!
There's nothing I can do!
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250. Dude, you can't let the government
fire off that nuke!
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251. They say they can do whatever they want
because imaginary things aren't real!
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252. Well, you have to convince them
they are real!
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253. No way, dude, then I'd have
to suck Cartman's balls.
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254. Whatever it takes,
you have to do it, all right?
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255. Hang on, Kyle,
Jesus wants to talk to you.
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256. - Hello, Kyle? This is Jesus.
- Oh boy...
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257. What seems to be
the problem, my child?
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258. Jesus, I can't do anything.
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259. I'm just a fourth grader going
against the entire government.
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260. Hello? Jesus?
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261. No. Hey, Kyle.
This is Luke Skywalker.
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262. Look, I know this seems like
an impossible task,
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263. but do you remember when
I brought down the Death Star?
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264. I mean, that seemed
impossible too, right?
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265. Yeah, I guess.
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266. Okay. Now hold on,
because Superman is here
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267. and he wants
to say something.
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268. - Kyle, this is Superman.
- Hi, Superman.
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269. I know that saving people can
be a big responsibility,
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270. but no matter what it takes,
it's worth it.
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271. I know.
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272. You can do this, Kyle.
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273. Now hang on, because Hercules
wants to talk to you.
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274. Oh God.
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275. Yes, God is here too.
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276. He's gonna talk to you
right after Captain Crunch.
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277. Popeye,
I need some help here!
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278. Popeye is being killed by
Christmas Critters.
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279. Get off of me!
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280. Hey, what is that?
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281. More spinach for Popeye!
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282. Imagine an M60
for Jesus!
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283. All right!
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284. The boy is doing it!
Everything is going to be okay!
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285. Missile launch
in one minute.
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286. Goddammit, you stupid assholes
are going to ruin everything!
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287. - Prepare for launch.
- Sir, we have a security breach!
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288. - What?
- There's an Unauthorized Entry Alert.
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289. - It's coming from sector two!
- Sector two?
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290. Kyle?
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291. - The hell are you doing back here?
- Listen, you don't have to do this!
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292. Our imaginations
aren't running wild anymore.
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293. Why is it so easy for children
to break into the Pentagon?
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294. You have to stop!
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295. If I'm not mistaken, you're the one
who bet that leprechauns weren't real.
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296. - So why do you care what happens?
- Because I...
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297. Because I think
they are real.
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298. It's all real.
Think about it.
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299. Haven't Luke Skywalker
and Santa Claus
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300. affected your lives more than
most real people in this room?
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301. I mean, whether
Jesus is real or not,
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302. he's had a bigger impact on the world
than any of us have.
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303. And the same could be said of Bugs Bunny
and Superman and Harry Potter.
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304. They've changed my life,
changed the way I act on the Earth.
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305. Doesn't that make them
kind of "real."
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306. They might be imaginary,
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307. but they're more important
than most of us here.
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308. And they're all gonna be around
long after we're dead.
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309. So in a way, those things are
more realer than any of us.
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310. Abort the sequence.
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311. So Kyle, imaginary things
are real, huh?
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312. Guess that means I did
win the bet after all.
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313. And you know
what that means, Kyle.
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314. Just let it go with your
fucking balls already,
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315. you fucking asshole!
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316. Your friends have been
in danger
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317. and all you care about
is this stupid bet!
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318. Well I've decided, Cartman.
Even if we had a bet,
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319. that I am never sucking your balls,
you got that?
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320. They can throw me in jail
for the rest of my life,
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321. but I am never going to suck
your balls, ever! So there!
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322. What happened?
Why hasn't the missile gone off?
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323. - There's been an abort, Mr. Gore.
- No! Man-bear-pig has to die!
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324. Oh Jesus, no!
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325. That's it, Aslan!
The evil characters have fled!
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326. The day is ours!
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327. - Kyle!
- Fellas! Where'd you come from?
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328. What is that?
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329. He did it!
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330. Oh look, I'm back!
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331. Nice going, kid.
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332. The evil characters!
They're all back behind the wall again.
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333. - Dude! How did you do that, Butters?
- Well, I just used my imagination.
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334. You know, I really have learned
a lot, you guys.
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335. What Kyle said about
imaginary things being real
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336. and Butters using
his imagination?
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337. It makes me think that...
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338. Well maybe we all have the power
to make things a reality.
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339. Oh why look, it's me.
And...
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340. And there's Kyle.
And what's Kyle about to do?
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341. Cartman, don't!
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342. Oh Kyle! What are you doing
to my balls?
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343. Oh, look!
It's Kyle sucking my balls!
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344. - Dude.
- Oh my God.
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345. Oh Kyle, you are gobbling those balls,
aren't you?
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346. I told you you would suck my balls
before this was over, didn't I, Kyle?
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347. I'm not sucking your balls.
That's imaginary!
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348. No, Kyle, I believe you said
that imaginary things are real.
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349. That's true. You did.
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350. Oh, look at you go, Kyle!
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351. Oh, you dirty girl!
You love those balls.
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352. Okay, Kyle, that's enough ballsucking.
We need to get you boys home.
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353. I am not sucking
Cartman's balls!
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354. Whatever you imagine
to be real, is real.
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355. Butters? Butters!
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356. What?
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357. Oh, it was all just
a dream.
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358. - Come on, Butters, time to get up.
- Oh Dad! I had the craziest dream!
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359. I saved all of Imaginationland from
running wild after a terrorist attack!
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360. You were in Imaginationland, Butters!
We've read all about it in the paper!
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361. The question is:
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362. What were you doing
in Imaginationland
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363. when you were supposed to be helping
your mother clean up the basement?
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364. You are grounded, mister!
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365. - Wait, I'm not grounded.
- Oh yes, you are!
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366. Oh yeah?
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367. That only works in Imaginationland.
You're grounded!
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368. Ah shit.
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