1. South Park - Season 11 Episode 10 "Imaginationland"Copy !req
2. All right, let's try over here.Copy !req
3. Set up traps there, and there as well.Copy !req
4. Last time I saw him he ran right through here.Copy !req
5. This is so retarded, Cartman.Copy !req
6. You've got everyone believing your stupid story.Copy !req
7. It isn't a story, it's true!Copy !req
8. I saw a leprechaun.Copy !req
9. I've seen him come through here three days in a row now.Copy !req
10. Hawk Eyes, this is Dragon Wind. Do you copy?Copy !req
11. This is Hawk Eyes.Copy !req
12. We've set up the net and we're standing by.Copy !req
13. Copy that, Hawk Eyes. Keep surveillance tag Alpha Niner.Copy !req
14. Dragon Wind out.Copy !req
15. Just admit you were lying, Cartman, so that everyone can go home!Copy !req
16. Oh no! We have a deal, Kyle!Copy !req
17. If I can prove there's a leprechain, you have to suck my balls, remember?Copy !req
18. Dragon Wind to Blackie: What's your six, Blackei?Copy !req
19. I don't want the code name Blackie.Copy !req
20. Code names are what they are, Blackie!Copy !req
21. Check your six and alert when in position!Copy !req
22. This is fucking retarded!Copy !req
23. Hahaha, getting nervous, Kyle?Copy !req
24. When that leprechaus shows up you must suck my balls!Copy !req
25. Don't forget I have a signed contract from you.Copy !req
26. Yeah, and if you couldn't prove there was a leprechaun,Copy !req
27. you have to give me ten dollars!Copy !req
28. Now just pay up and stop being stupid!Copy !req
29. Goddamnit, why hasn't it shown up yet?Copy !req
30. Dragon Wind to Faggot! Come in, Faggot!Copy !req
31. This is faggot.Copy !req
32. Go ahead.Copy !req
33. Faggot I need you to keep surveillance North to North East. Check back in five.Copy !req
34. Okay, will do.Copy !req
35. Faggot out.Copy !req
36. Okay, that's enough. Everybody!Copy !req
37. Cartman is just pulling one of his stupid tricks on everyone,Copy !req
38. because he's trying to get out of a deal he made!Copy !req
39. It was here, I swear it!Copy !req
40. I don't know why it's not showin' up this time!Copy !req
41. You didn't see a leprechaun, fatass!Copy !req
42. If you could prove it, I had to suck your balls, but if you couldn't,Copy !req
43. you had to pay me ten dollars! Pay up!Copy !req
44. Uh, I got somethin'! I got it!Copy !req
45. It's uh... Oh jeez I thnk it's a leprechaun!Copy !req
46. Set off diversion track C!Copy !req
47. Dude...Copy !req
48. Fuh, fuck me, it's a leprechaun.Copy !req
49. Get it!Copy !req
50. Get that fucking leprechaun! I want it alive!Copy !req
51. Wow. Cool. No way. Whoa. Wow.Copy !req
52. Eugh! Uh, move aside! Move aside!Copy !req
53. All right, butthole, where's the gold?Copy !req
54. You lads don't know what you're doin'. I need to deliver an important message!Copy !req
55. There's goin' to be an attack!Copy !req
56. Tell me where the gold is or you die! Slow!Copy !req
57. Where'd he go?Copy !req
58. I was sent to warn of a terrorist attack,Copy !req
59. but you boys have made me late.Copy !req
60. Now the terrorists will prevail! The end is near!Copy !req
61. Dude.Copy !req
62. Kyle,Copy !req
63. suck my balls.Copy !req
64. Dad, where do leprechauns come from?Copy !req
65. From Ireland.Copy !req
66. So... why would one come to America to warn us about a terrorist attack.Copy !req
67. Kyle, leprechauns aren't real. You're almost nine now;Copy !req
68. you need to understand the difference beween real and imaginary.Copy !req
69. I thought I did.Copy !req
70. Ohhh, Ms. Broflovski, how are you this fine evening?Copy !req
71. Oh, hello Eric.Copy !req
72. Kyle, your friend is here.Copy !req
73. Hello, Mr. Broflovski, Ike.Copy !req
74. Nice evening, isn't it?Copy !req
75. Well Kyle, shall we go up to your room for a few minutes.Copy !req
76. Get out of here, Cartman, we're eating dinner!Copy !req
77. Uhh, Kyle, I believe a certain someoneCopy !req
78. is supposed to put a certain set of balls in their mouth.Copy !req
79. - I'm not doing it, fatass! - Doing what?Copy !req
80. We had a deal, Kyle!Copy !req
81. Just get out of here!Copy !req
82. You signed an agreement, Kyle!Copy !req
83. I don't care if I signed an agreement!Copy !req
84. Ah hey now Kyle, if you made a deal with somebody, you have to stick by it.Copy !req
85. Thank you, Mr. Broflovski.Copy !req
86. What was the agreement?Copy !req
87. That if he could prove leprechauns exist, I would suck his balls.Copy !req
88. Whatwhatwhat?Copy !req
89. And there was a leprechaun! You saw it, Kyle!Copy !req
90. Hey dudes.Copy !req
91. Hey Kyle.Copy !req
92. So, how was it?Copy !req
93. How was what?Copy !req
94. Sucking Cartman's b-balls.Copy !req
95. I didn't suck his balls, all right?Copy !req
96. And and I'm not going to!Copy !req
97. Dude, why did you ever agree to suck his balls in the first place.Copy !req
98. I didn't think there would actually be a leprechaun! And I still don't!Copy !req
99. Why would a leprechaun be warning us of a terrorist attack?Copy !req
100. There's another explanation for all this.Copy !req
101. Excuse me.Copy !req
102. Have you boys seen a leprechaun anywhere lately?Copy !req
103. What do you know about the leprechaun?Copy !req
104. Ooooo, then you did see him.Copy !req
105. That's splendiferous!Copy !req
106. I want you to tell me everything he said.Copy !req
107. Where was he? What was he doing?Copy !req
108. All right I've had enough!Copy !req
109. Leprechauns are imaginary!Copy !req
110. Well of course they are.Copy !req
111. But just because they're imaginary doesn't mean they're not real.Copy !req
112. Haven't you boys ever used your imagination?Copy !req
113. You, young man!Copy !req
114. How would you like to be a cowboy? Or a swashbuckling pirate?Copy !req
115. And you! How would you like to be an astronaut, faaar out in space?Copy !req
116. All it takes is a little... imagination.Copy !req
117. - Who the hell are you? - Still not convinced, eh?Copy !req
118. I tell you what, boys.Copy !req
119. What say we all take a ride on my... Imagination Flying Machine?Copy !req
120. Dude.Copy !req
121. Hop aboard, kids. I have something to show you.Copy !req
122. Uhhh, are you gonna rap us?Copy !req
123. no?Copy !req
124. Ah all right then.Copy !req
125. Come on, guys.Copy !req
126. Watch it, fellas. I'm pretty sure this guy wants to rape us.Copy !req
127. All aboard the Imagination Balloon!Copy !req
128. Some people feel imagination isn't real,Copy !req
129. but I tell them that they're wrong,Copy !req
130. 'cause whenever I want to play and pretend,Copy !req
131. I just sing the Imagination SooongCopy !req
132. Imagination...Copy !req
133. Imagination...Copy !req
134. Imagination...Copy !req
135. Imagination...Copy !req
136. Imagination...Copy !req
137. Imagination...Copy !req
138. Imagination...Copy !req
139. Imagination...Copy !req
140. Imagination... Imagination... Imagination...Copy !req
141. Imagination... Imagination...Copy !req
142. Are you gonna take us somewhere or not?Copy !req
143. But my boy,Copy !req
144. we're already here.Copy !req
145. What is this place?Copy !req
146. This... is Imaginationland.Copy !req
147. It's where all the wonderful and goofy thingsCopy !req
148. that humans have made up over the years live together.Copy !req
149. Shitishens of Imaginationland!Copy !req
150. We have distinguished guests from the world beyond!Copy !req
151. Hello.Copy !req
152. Welcome to Imaginationland. I am the Lollipop King.Copy !req
153. We are honored to have Creators in our kingdom.Copy !req
154. Now, good news, everyone!Copy !req
155. These boys did see the leprechaun!Copy !req
156. What did he tell you? Did he have any news?Copy !req
157. Well he said there was gonna be a-Copy !req
158. that there was... gonna be a-Copy !req
159. ALLAH!Copy !req
160. OH FUCK NO!Copy !req
161. STAN, WE HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE!Copy !req
162. Quickly boys! Get on my back!Copy !req
163. Fellas! Fellas wait!Copy !req
164. Hold on, fellas!Copy !req
165. Butters.Copy !req
166. Don't leave me, fellas! Come back!Copy !req
167. Dude!Copy !req
168. Hey guys!Copy !req
169. BUTTEEEEERS!Copy !req
170. Wha? Where...?Copy !req
171. Oh. Oh dude.Copy !req
172. Oh, it was just a dream.Copy !req
173. It was all just a crazy dream.Copy !req
174. Huh, oh my God.Copy !req
175. Hello?Copy !req
176. Dude, did you finish your math homework?Copy !req
177. I kind of lost track of time last night.Copy !req
178. No no I I hardly got any sleep.Copy !req
179. I had this whole messed up dream about some gay Mayor guyCopy !req
180. taking us to Imaginationland where all these imaginary characters live?Copy !req
181. And then it got attacked by terrorists?Copy !req
182. Yeah! How'd you know?Copy !req
183. Dude! I had the same dream!Copy !req
184. We jumped on a dragon's back and, and Butters got left behind!Copy !req
185. Stan? Stanley?Copy !req
186. You haven't seen your little friend Butters, have you?Copy !req
187. Why?Copy !req
188. Our darling Butters never came home last night.Copy !req
189. What did they say?Copy !req
190. We don't wanna jump to conclusions, but...Copy !req
191. we're worried that maybe somebody kidnapped Butters,Copy !req
192. sodomized him over and over again, and then fed his genitals to wild animals.Copy !req
193. There there, darling.Copy !req
194. Dude...Copy !req
195. Laides and gentlemen, I have dire news.Copy !req
196. Yesterday, at approximately 18:00 hours,Copy !req
197. terrorists successfully attacked...Copy !req
198. our imagination.Copy !req
199. Our imagnation?Copy !req
200. How?Copy !req
201. The imaginary attack appears to have been in the works for years.Copy !req
202. The effects of the attack are so far... unimaginable.Copy !req
203. We've intercepted this videotape the terrorists made for broadcast.Copy !req
204. Luckily we've kept it from being broadcast to the public.Copy !req
205. No! It's just a Care Bear!Copy !req
206. Oh my God.Copy !req
207. Later in the video we can see another imaginary hostage;Copy !req
208. this one reading a forced statement.Copy !req
209. Praise to the mighty Allah.Copy !req
210. His divine grace a-and will have brought forth this day.Copy !req
211. Oh jeez!Copy !req
212. Uhhh, nnow see, your safety is at our whim.Copy !req
213. This is the price you pay, America!Copy !req
214. You have defiled Allah,Copy !req
215. and now we will turn your imagination against you!Copy !req
216. Death to the Infidels!Copy !req
217. Can I go now?Copy !req
218. Stan! Kyle!Copy !req
219. Could you could you get me out of here?Copy !req
220. Gentlemen, the terrorists appear to have complete control of our imagination.Copy !req
221. It's only a matter of time before...Copy !req
222. our imaginations start running wild.Copy !req
223. I believe a serious blow to democracy has just been dealt.Copy !req
224. A travesty has occurred, and I want justice!Copy !req
225. Kyle Broflovski did willingly and knowinglyCopy !req
226. sign a contract, and yet, to date,Copy !req
227. he has made no effort, nor does he show any intention,Copy !req
228. of ever sucking my balls!Copy !req
229. I've given him ample time to fulfill his obligation, and he has thus refused.Copy !req
230. I stand before you with dry balls, Your Honor.Copy !req
231. I've provided witnesses, collected testimonials,Copy !req
232. and still, my balls remain dry.Copy !req
233. I want what I'm entitled to!Copy !req
234. Mr. Broflovski,Copy !req
235. did you agree to orally imbibe Mr. Cartman's scrotum and testicles?Copy !req
236. I...Copy !req
237. Is this not your signature on the contract?Copy !req
238. but...Copy !req
239. Come o- come on! Really?Copy !req
240. I mean, aren't there more important things going on right now?Copy !req
241. From what I've been presented and the evidence put forth,Copy !req
242. the court has no choice but to order youCopy !req
243. to place Mr. Cartman's pubicle sac in your mouth,Copy !req
244. and draw upon it succulently for no less than 30 seconds.Copy !req
245. Yesss!Copy !req
246. You have twenty four hours to suck aforementioned balls.Copy !req
247. If after that time you still refuse,Copy !req
248. the court will be forced to arrest you for contempt. Next case!Copy !req
249. Thank you Your Honor.Copy !req
250. This isn't a victory for me, this is a victory for the justice system.Copy !req
251. And my balls.Copy !req
252. What I am about to tell you is highly classified.Copy !req
253. Two days ago, Muslim terrorists hijacked our imagination.Copy !req
254. Frankly we don't know what their next move is or how to stop them.Copy !req
255. In times like these the government often turns to Hollywood for help.Copy !req
256. You creative filmmakers can think of idea we just can't.Copy !req
257. That's why we've asked you here, M. Night Shyal-amalam.Copy !req
258. The Sixth Sense, Signs, The Village, all very clever films.Copy !req
259. But can you use your amazing idea brain nowCopy !req
260. to help us stop the terrorists?Copy !req
261. What if...Copy !req
262. What if it turns out they aren't terrorists?Copy !req
263. But they're actually werewolves? From the future?Copy !req
264. N, no. No, they're terrorists. They've been linked to Al Qaeda.Copy !req
265. But what if Al Qaeda, it turns out, is the group being terrorized? By aliens?Copy !req
266. No- No. That's not an idea, that's a twist.Copy !req
267. We need ideas.Copy !req
268. How about we make everyone think that terrorists attacked us?Copy !req
269. But really, we were all already dead.Copy !req
270. Get him out of here.Copy !req
271. Mr. Bay, can you thnk of any idea how to outwit these terrorists?Copy !req
272. I believe I can.Copy !req
273. We start... by making a big CG buildingCopy !req
274. and then we have a meteor go CROSSHH!Copy !req
275. and it, and it's all like CRAAWWWLLCopy !req
276. and motorcycles burst into flame while they jump over these helicopters, right?Copy !req
277. No no!Copy !req
278. We need ideas how to stop the terrorists!Copy !req
279. An eighteen-wheeler spins out of control and it's all like BROSSHHCopy !req
280. And then this huuuge tanker full of dyna-Copy !req
281. Those aren't ideas, those are special effects!Copy !req
282. I... don't understand the difference.Copy !req
283. I know you don't. Get him out of here!Copy !req
284. Aaand being that we are all big Mel Gibson film fans,Copy !req
285. we thought maybe you could help us.Copy !req
286. Ah, my nipples, they hurt!Copy !req
287. They hurt when I twist them!Copy !req
288. Yes, uh,Copy !req
289. I don't suppose you have any creative ideasCopy !req
290. how to fight these terrorists?Copy !req
291. How about this?Copy !req
292. You have that tape that the terrorists made, right?Copy !req
293. Well maybe if you did a background check on that videotape,Copy !req
294. you might find somebody who doesn't belong.Copy !req
295. Somebody who doesn't fit Imaginationland. Ohhh!Copy !req
296. Heyy... that's not a bad idea.Copy !req
297. Yeah. Say what you will about Mel Gibson,Copy !req
298. but the sonofabitch knows story structure.Copy !req
299. Get the videotape and do a background check on everyone in it!Copy !req
300. Oogh! Yess!Copy !req
301. All the imaginary characters in the tape were identified, sir.Copy !req
302. Count Chocula, Cinderella, Snarf from Thundercats,Copy !req
303. but hereCopy !req
304. Nothing in American folklore or storytalling match this kid.Copy !req
305. He appears to be...Copy !req
306. just some kid.Copy !req
307. Stan! Kyle! Could you could you get me out of here?Copy !req
308. I want digital imaging and resource magnification done stat!Copy !req
309. If that kid isn't imaginary I want to know who he is,Copy !req
310. where he's from, and who his friends are!Copy !req
311. Yes sir!Copy !req
312. Who are you?Copy !req
313. Uh, excuse me? Uh Mr. Terrorist, sir?Copy !req
314. Uh, I'm actually not imaginary,Copy !req
315. a-and um, my p-my parents are gonna ground me if I don't get back-Copy !req
316. Aaah! Okay, sorry. Uh sorry.Copy !req
317. Can you tell what the terrorists are doing?Copy !req
318. They're going something to Rockety Rocket.Copy !req
319. No!Copy !req
320. Leave me alone! Haaa!Copy !req
321. It doesn't make sense. What do they want with Rockety?Copy !req
322. The only reason they would-Copy !req
323. Oh my God.Copy !req
324. They're gonna blow up the Barrier!Copy !req
325. Uh what's the Barrier?Copy !req
326. The wall!Copy !req
327. The wall which separates the evil side of Imaginationland from the good side!Copy !req
328. No! No you can't blow up the barrier!Copy !req
329. Are you insane?Copy !req
330. We can't let this happen.Copy !req
331. It will be the end of Imaginationland.Copy !req
332. Yeah. You have to stop them, kid.Copy !req
333. Me? Woo, what am I supposed to do?Copy !req
334. Don't you get it?Copy !req
335. If the terrorists blow that barrier,Copy !req
336. all the most evil things ever imagined are gonna pour outCopy !req
337. and take over Imaginationland for good!Copy !req
338. YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING!Copy !req
339. Thanks for coming, everyone.Copy !req
340. The big moment is almost here, as soon as Kyle arrives.Copy !req
341. He's not gonna show up to suck your balls dude.Copy !req
342. He has to. He's been ordered by the court.Copy !req
343. Hey, he's here.Copy !req
344. What? Move aside, move aside!Copy !req
345. Dude, do you really have to do it?Copy !req
346. Let's just get this over with!Copy !req
347. Yes, come on in, peasant Kyle, and pay homage to this sultan's balls.Copy !req
348. God damnit!Copy !req
349. Yehehehesss. Yehhhs!Copy !req
350. That's them, sir. Stan Marsh and Kyle Broflovski.Copy !req
351. You boys need to come with us on a matter of national security.Copy !req
352. Who are you?Copy !req
353. There's no time! You need to come with us right now!Copy !req
354. Hey, let go of him!Copy !req
355. We aren't going to hurt your little friends. We just need information.Copy !req
356. No! No, he has to suck my balls!Copy !req
357. NO!Copy !req
358. KYYYYLE!Copy !req
359. Allah akbar!Copy !req
360. No! Noooo!Copy !req
361. Hold on! Hold on a second!Copy !req
362. Now, you really should think about this. I mean, uh,Copy !req
363. I know you think attacking our imagination will get you somewhere,Copy !req
364. but will it really?Copy !req
365. If you destroy that wall,Copy !req
366. all the most evil parts of our imagination are gonna break loose,Copy !req
367. but... will it really make you terrorists feel better?Copy !req
368. Maybe it's time for us all to just... get along.Copy !req
369. ALLAH!Copy !req
370. Jesus Christ, no!Copy !req
371. That was your plan to stop them?Copy !req
372. Y-yeah, and that's not a heartfelt speech?Copy !req
373. That's fucking stupid!Copy !req
374. They are coming...Copy !req
375. To be continuedCopy !req
376. Glad I picked you up, kid.Copy !req
377. It's dangerous for someone your age to be hitchhikin'Copy !req
378. Yeah well, when a man has been wronged...Copy !req
379. he no longer cares about danger.Copy !req
380. You goin' to Washington to visit family?Copy !req
381. I've got unfinished business.Copy !req
382. You go through life being told there's justice,Copy !req
383. then you learn that the only real justcie...Copy !req
384. is the justice you take.Copy !req
385. Make no mistake, Kyle.Copy !req
386. Before this is over, you will suck my balls.Copy !req
387. Team SouthParkNews.Net Transcript: South Park ScriptoriumCopy !req