1. Grrr!
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2. Breaking news!
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3. An epidemic is spreading
across the globe.
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4. Beaver Fever!
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5. I'm not talking about
an actual disease, of course.
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6. I'm colourfully describing
the mania
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7. surrounding teen
singing sensation Justin Beaver.
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8. Girls everywhere are going gaga
for this teen heart-throb.
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9. They can't get enough of him.
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10. And suddenly Dad the anchor-bird
isn't cool any more.
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11. Maybe Justin Beaver will
foot the bill for private school
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12. instead of buying
those golf clubs he wanted.
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13. Just what this world needs.
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14. Another cookie-cutter pop star
force-fed to us by the man.
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15. You're right,
this Beaver Fever thing
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16. is clearly a marketing ploy
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17. to sell sub-standard music
to gullible teenage girls.
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18. Who could possibly fall for it?
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19. Isn't Justin great?
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20. When I heard his first song,
"Girl, I Like You",
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21. I wasn't sure if Justin was
actually talking about me.
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22. But then
his next song was titled
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23. "Yes, I'm Actually
Talking About You"
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24. and I totally freaked out!
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25. How can you allow yourself
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26. to become a pawn
of the corporate fat cats?
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27. Before you judge,
just listen to one track.
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28. I don't want to over-hype it,
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29. but he's the greatest
entertainer who ever lived!
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30. Ugh! That was terrible.
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31. I finally have a soundtrack
for my nightmares.
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32. I... love it!
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33. I knew I could rely on Sticks
to be the voice of reason.
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34. We're through
the looking glass here.
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35. White is black
and black is white.
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36. Wait till you hear the rest!
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37. Sticks, we still on
for rock climbing?
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38. Uh, sure, whatever.
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39. Hello? Sticks? You ready to go?
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40. What happened in here?
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41. I turned my burrow into a
totes adorbs tribute to Justin.
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42. Oh, is that
what's going on here?
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43. Sticks! Sticks! Sticks!
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44. You are not gonna believe it.
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45. Justin Beaver is in town
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46. and he's doing a signing
at the music shop right now!
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47. And he's performing a concert
at Village Centre this weekend!
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48. You really need
to stop doing that.
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49. What should we wear?
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50. I'm thinking of wearing
the one outfit I own.
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51. - Me too.
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52. I can understand Amy
fan-girling out, but Sticks?
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53. There's something fishy
about this Beaver Fever.
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54. We need to investigate.
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55. I hope you ladies are ready,
because here he is.
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56. The boy
who'd sweep you off your feet
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57. if he didn't have
such tiny little arms.
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58. Your favourite global pop
phenomenon, Justin Beaver!
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59. You're the only fan
I care about.
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60. You're the only fan
I care about.
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61. You're the only fan
I care about.
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62. Be my baby! Ohh!
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63. Just step over her.
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64. We're not selling
enough merch. Turn it up.
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65. Whatever's going on,
that guy's behind it.
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66. Music industry professionals
only.
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67. Don't worry, I got this.
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68. How are we gonna convince
this guy we're in the music biz?
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69. I know just what to do...
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70. we'll form
our very own boy band.
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71. Did you have to bring us down
here to finish that sentence?
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72. A boy band?
We'll lose our street cred.
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73. What about our machismo?
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74. Mmm... cheese-mo.
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75. I know, but to find out
what's going on with the girls
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76. we're going to have to man up.
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77. And by "man up" you mean
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78. rehearse a choreographed dance
routine in sequined outfits?
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79. Exactly. It'll take a lot of
work so we'd better get started.
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80. - Easier than I thought.
- We just have to pick a name.
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81. We've still got
a little montage time left.
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82. Knuckles! Stop tearing pages
off that calendar.
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83. - OK, fine.
- We need to think of names.
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84. I was saving this name
for if I ever formed a band,
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85. but how about... Dude-itude?
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86. Too awesome-sounding. It needs
to be soft and inoffensive.
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87. - Something like...
- Dreamboat Express?
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88. Eww!
- It's perfect.
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89. Music industry professionals
only.
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90. We are
music industry professionals.
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91. We're Justin's opening act.
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92. Mm-mm.
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93. I guess this is the end
of Dreamboat Express.
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94. Dreamboat Express?
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95. With a name like that, you must
be professionals. Come on in.
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96. There he is. Now
to find out his evil scheme.
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97. Your 3 p.m. Got moved to 6 p.m.,
your 6 p.m. Got moved to 4 p.m.
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98. I guess it makes sense
he wouldn't reveal his evil scheme
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99. the exact moment
we happened to be listening.
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100. Shifting gears, how's
our evil scheme coming along?
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101. Looking good.
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102. Tonight
Justin will debut his new single
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103. which has 50% more mind control.
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104. Perfect!
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105. Any female
within a five-mile radius
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106. will be turned into
a mindless consumer zombie,
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107. and I'll be reaping the profits.
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108. Mind control. That explains it.
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109. Intruders! Get them!
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110. Mind control?
That's preposterous.
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111. Justin would never do that.
He and I have a special bond.
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112. Us too. He even
wrote a song only about me.
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113. It's called "Every Single Girl
I've Ever Met".
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114. But it's true!
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115. Justin's producer conveniently
revealed the whole scheme
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116. right in front of us.
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117. Talk about lazy writing!
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118. Trust us, guys,
we're not under mind control.
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119. Let's get to that concert
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120. and spend our life savings
on Justin Beaver merchandise.
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121. Don't worry,
I know just what to do...
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122. since the mind control
is embedded in the music track,
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123. there must be an opposite
sound frequency to counter it.
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124. We just need to find it.
Thus, the Measure-ometer!
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125. It's fun to bring people
a long way to finish a sentence.
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126. It really is.
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127. And now here he is,
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128. the nocturnal, semi-aquatic
rodent of your dreams,
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129. Justin Beaver!
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130. For me to calibrate
the Measure-ometer,
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131. we need to get on that stage
without being seen.
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132. - Hey, you there!
Huh!
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133. The show's starting.
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134. The opening act needs to be
up on that stage.
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135. Man, I'm good at my job.
What would they do without me?
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136. Has it discovered
the counter-frequency?
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137. Not yet.
We have to stall Justin.
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138. - Who are you?
- Dreamboat Express!
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139. Ugh, I hate that name.
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140. And we challenge you
to a sing-off.
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141. What are they doing here?
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142. Wow, they're pretty good.
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143. I'd love to meet those guys
some day.
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144. He's talking about me!
In your face!
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145. The counter-frequency!
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146. Of course.
I should have known all along.
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147. - Drop that generic fat beat!
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148. Not rock and roll!
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149. Ladies and... uh... ladies,
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150. prepare for the bad boy musical
stylings of... Dude-itude!
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151. - Ugh!
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152. What happened? Where are we?
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153. I don't know, but listen
to that sweet guitar solo.
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154. Your power rock has freed me
from the evil of mind control.
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155. I can move into an industry
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156. where I won't be exploited
by unscrupulous producers.
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157. Hello, humiliating
reality TV series!
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158. I'm ruined! I'm ruined!
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159. - We're here!
We're Dude-itude!
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160. Eclair Media
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