1. Good.
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2. I can't even taste my own tears
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3. They fall into
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4. An even sadder bastard's eyes
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5. Yeah, I'm… I'm a TV on the road
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6. Yeah, I'm… I'm getting up to leave
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7. You don't know what it means to me that
you've all welcomed me into your family,
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8. and I just want to say thank you.
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9. And, um…
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10. Nothing. I just…
I hope you can forgive me.
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11. I don't really play with toys
like this anymore.
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12. I want a video camera. A nice one.
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13. Oh, well, I don't…
It was just more of a… a gesture.
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14. Write it in a card instead.
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15. That's actually a good idea.
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16. There's card stock in the junk drawer.
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17. Thanks.
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18. Sorry, ma'am.
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19. Holy fuck!
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20. Hi. Who are you talking to?
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21. I'm just on hold with, um, neurosurgery
at Johns Hopkins.
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22. I talked to this guy at UCSF.
He was, like, a total dick.
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23. But there's this world-renowned surgeon
in Paris I'm gonna try next.
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24. - He's done promising new research.
- Why?
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25. To help my mom.
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26. Honey, I don't think
she's looking for help.
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27. You know what I realized?
It's a brain tumor.
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28. You know, I think the tumor,
it's, like, messing with her head.
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29. It's, uh…
it's, like, clouding her judgment.
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30. You know, I just… It makes total sense.
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31. You know, she's doing fine.
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32. She seems like herself,
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33. except for this one insane decision
she's made, and I just…
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34. She doesn't need to die.
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35. She needs the best neurosurgeon
in the world.
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36. And I don't know why
Jules isn't calling everyone he knows.
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37. Actually, he might know someone
who knows this doctor at Sinai.
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38. - Take a shower and get dressed.
- I'm in the middle of something.
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39. - This is important!
- Nicky.
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40. This is the most important thing to me.
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41. Let's postpone the wedding.
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42. Are you serious?
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43. No, so you can focus
on the most important thing to you.
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44. I didn't mean it like that. I…
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45. I don't mean it like that either. I mean
that your mom dropped a huge bomb on you,
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46. and yeah, it is more important
than the wedding. And…
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47. I don't know. Maybe we don't want
to get married under these circumstances.
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48. Come here.
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49. Who's that?
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50. Mmm?
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51. Who's that little guy?
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52. Oh…
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53. This is my dumb apology for, like,
tactlessly unearthing your family secret.
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54. We can have the wedding
as planned this week.
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55. This doesn't change anything for us.
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56. Yeah.
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57. But it does, like…
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58. It does change a lot.
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59. I'm not gonna let it
get in the way of our wedding.
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60. I'm with you.
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61. - Really?
- Mm-hmm. I'm with you.
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62. 4ever?
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63. 4ever.
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64. - What?
- Oh! Portia!
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65. Where's the dress? It needs to be altered.
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66. I have 500 things I have to do.
Nicky, stop touching her!
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67. The table man delivered eight tables—
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68. - Nicky, stop. Ew!
- I'm helping.
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69. - The caterer needs the menu finalized.
- Okay, let me help you.
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70. What?
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71. Let me help you.
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72. The dress is in there.
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73. Nicky's suit is in there.
What else do you need?
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74. By the way, I haven't gotten
to say thank you, Portia, for—
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75. I saw your cake.
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76. - Oh, yeah.
- And I read your card.
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77. You know what's weird?
I have to ask you something.
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78. You thought we were gonna kill you?
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79. No offense, but that's kind of
an insane conclusion to draw.
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80. Did someone try to kill you once
or something?
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81. - No. No.
- Then why did you think that?
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82. It's just how my brain works.
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83. Like, right now, I… I feel like
there's someone standing behind this door.
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84. I googled you, you know.
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85. It's like you don't even exist.
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86. No social media, no Linkedln,
not even, like, high school sports stats.
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87. Either you didn't play sports,
or you weren't good.
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88. I was homeschooled, actually.
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89. So I played the sport of, like,
trying not to be a total freak.
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90. But I don't think that it worked.
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91. Yeah, I'm like the opposite.
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92. I never thought anyone
was trying to kill me.
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93. - Whoa, when did all this happen?
- Hey. Hey.
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94. What is this?
It's supposed to be live-edge cedar.
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95. These are like sticks.
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96. This is a tasteful wedding,
not the Blair Witch Project.
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97. This is what you ordered.
Rustic beechwood.
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98. Rustic beechwood.
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99. Look around you, man.
I don't see a fucking beach. Um…
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100. The wedding theme is forest of love.
Could I talk to Dominick?
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101. He doesn't do consults after
his work's been approved. You approved.
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102. Well, no, I didn't approve this.
This is not my vision.
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103. Hey, Portia. Come here. Look.
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104. I… I think that this…
this is actually gonna look really nice.
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105. - No.
- Yeah, it is. It is.
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106. They're gonna do that thing here.
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107. And I think, I mean, they have a plan.
You guys have a plan.
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108. Of course we have a plan.
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109. This stick goes there,
that stick goes there.
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110. - I'm not tipping him.
- It makes an arch.
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111. Portia, I think the flowers
look really nice.
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112. - I think that's gonna look nice too—
- These aren't the flowers, Rachel.
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113. Mmm… What?
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114. Well, they're fake. They're fake.
The real ones come day of.
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115. What? Portia, that's crazy.
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116. These are… these are perfectly arranged.
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117. They're ready to go.
Why don't we just use these?
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118. We obviously need real flowers, Rachel.
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119. Do you want your wedding
to look like a hospital waiting room?
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120. God, I did this arrangement in advance
so I could actually see it.
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121. We've always envisioned
a winter wedding at Somerhouse.
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122. Went back and forth
about the color scheme.
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123. Rust, sage, evergreen, and white.
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124. But there is just too much rust
and not enough sage. Here, take these.
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125. I think it's…
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126. They look pretty perfect to me.
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127. You can't be trusted with flowers.
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128. You brought white lilies, funeral flowers.
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129. - Fuck.
- Of course you didn't know.
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130. Apparently you grew up homeschooled
in some ditch or something.
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131. Whoa.
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132. - Thanks.
- You know, I don't understand you at all.
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133. Who's your maid of honor?
What's your walk song?
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134. Do you have anyone
to walk you down the aisle?
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135. It's okay, Portia. You really… You…
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136. - You don't have to worry about this.
- I do have to worry about it.
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137. Because you're not worried,
and someone has to fucking worry.
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138. Okay.
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139. Okay. I will
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140. walk myself down the aisle.
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141. I don't know. I don't know what song yet,
but I promise you I will… I will pick one.
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142. Okay?
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143. Will you be my maid of honor?
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144. Would you do that for me?
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145. The caterer called, and they don't have
everyone's final meal choice, so…
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146. Okay. Great.
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147. Then I will ask everyone here
what they want. What are the options?
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148. Chicken or fish.
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149. - Okay. And veggie option?
- I will light you on fire.
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150. Come in. You can help me.
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151. Which do you think best captures…
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152. Oh my God.
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153. …his spirit?
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154. He's so cute.
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155. This one.
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156. Oh! Oh, I don't have one of you.
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157. - Oh, no. Don't worry. That's totally fine.
- Mm-mm, mm-mm.
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158. Oh, no, no, no, no. Please. I don't…
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159. I don't want to disturb you.
I just wanted to ask you if…
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160. if you wanted
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161. chicken or fish for the wedding?
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162. I want to be buried with my whole family.
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163. Do you want it?
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164. I'm… I'm getting rid of my attachment
to all things.
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165. - Thanks.
- Mm-hmm.
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166. Do you know where Dr. Cunningham is?
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167. He's probably in his dungeon
working on the dog.
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168. Now that he's finished the grave,
he needs something else to fixate on.
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169. Oh, and that's all right if that's how
he wants to spend his last days with me.
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170. Can I ask you something?
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171. Do you think that everyone
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172. is dealing okay? I mean, with…
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173. …with your death?
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174. Well… …how could they be? I mean…
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175. Well, you know, they could be talking
to each other about it.
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176. They could be leaning on each other.
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177. They could be processing it all with you.
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178. There are doulas for these situations,
someone who can help you—
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179. Have you dealt with it?
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180. With what? With your death?
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181. With yours. Your mother's, I mean.
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182. My mother died before I knew her.
There was nothing left to deal with.
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183. Well, I know that
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184. you grew up without a mother.
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185. But it would be naive to think that
just because you didn't know your mother,
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186. you don't have to deal with all this.
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187. It doesn't go away
if you close your eyes real tight.
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188. You didn't just suddenly exist.
You came from…
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189. somewhere, and when you die,
you will leave somewhere behind.
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190. "There was nothing left"?
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191. You are what's left.
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192. I'll have both.
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193. Chicken and fish. Why not?
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194. Baby, why am I missing you
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195. When I ought to be kissing you?
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196. Tell me our love has just begun
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197. You're my only one…
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198. You shouldn't sleep in the bathtub.
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199. I wasn't sleeping.
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200. I had to give a girl CPR once in college.
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201. I had to give her
chest compressions and everything.
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202. Yeah, that is what CPR is.
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203. The girl drowned, Jules.
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204. Guess how.
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205. She fell asleep in the bathtub.
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206. I know. You've told me that before.
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207. I already know everything
that's ever happened to you.
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208. Do you wanna know
why Rachel thought we were gonna kill her?
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209. I don't know. She's got something fucky
going on with her.
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210. I bet you like that, don't you?
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211. Your Sorry Man.
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212. Nell, what about me soaking quietly
in a bathtub makes you go,
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213. "Let me come in here and stab Jules
over and over again with a toothpick
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214. till he bleeds to death."
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215. That's what it's like with you.
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216. Portia's the one
who told her about The Sorry Man.
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217. Portia always has to be
the center of attention.
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218. Portia's the one who fucked everything up.
No one ever blames Portia for anything.
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219. Whatever.
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220. Whatever.
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221. And it's not my fault Nicky gets off
on damaged, self-absorbed girls.
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222. He's a simp for girls
who walk all over him.
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223. He thinks he's fixing them.
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224. I'm just trying to be at peace.
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225. Why are you disturbing my peace?
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226. It's bath time.
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227. You used to be nicer.
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228. Oh, baby, you want nice?
You should have married the other one.
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229. But that's the thing, Nellie.
You don't want nice.
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230. Because I hate to break it to you.
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231. You're not actually nice either.
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232. And you couldn't stand to watch Nicky
take the punches.
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233. You want someone who punches back.
It's true.
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234. Sometimes nice is nice.
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235. Well, I'm sometimes nice.
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236. What?
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237. Say it.
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238. Didn't we say that in our vows?
That we'd always be honest no matter what?
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239. Oh! We've really stuck to our vows,
haven't we?
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240. Say it.
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241. Say it.
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242. Say it.
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243. Say it.
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244. Or drown me.
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245. Drown me.
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246. Yeah. Yeah.
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247. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
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248. Oh, sorry. Oh my God.
Oh my God. Sorry. Sorry.
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249. No. Don't go. One moment.
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250. Okay. You want me to say it.
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251. Your mother will be gone in a month,
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252. and you haven't dealt with it.
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253. You've never really dealt with anything,
have you?
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254. Not your last failed marriage,
not this jealous brother bullshit,
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255. and not your maybe fictitious,
maybe real serial killer
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256. who's been haunting you
since you were Jude's age,
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257. which is exactly how old you were
when you stopped growing up.
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258. You need to deal with your shit, yeah?
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259. Because things will start slipping away
all around you.
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260. Are you who you want your son to be,
Julian?
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261. Yes! What do you want?
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262. Sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt.
I just… Uh, it's… it's really stupid.
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263. I didn't realize he was in the tub.
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264. That was really nice,
what you did with the cake.
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265. Really nice. Nellie likes 'em nice.
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266. Ignore him.
It's the key to a healthy marriage.
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267. It's actually stupid.
The caterer needs to know
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268. if you guys want chicken or fish
for the wedding.
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269. Uh, chicken.
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270. Rachel, have you written your vows?
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271. Uh, no, not yet. I…
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272. - I haven't.
- Here's the key to a healthy marriage.
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273. In our vows, Nellie and I promised to
always be honest, so I mean it when I say,
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274. "Baby, sometimes I fantasize
about hiring someone to kill you."
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275. Oh, babe.
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276. So even in your fantasies,
you don't do anything yourself?
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277. What's the fish,
and how's the chicken prepared?
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278. I don't know.
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279. You don't know? 'Cause I can't answer
until I have all the information.
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280. Don't be a dick. He'll have the fish.
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281. You should really write your vows.
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282. - Sorry.
- Sorry.
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283. What are you looking at?
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284. What's in here?
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285. Jude.
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286. I got you something.
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287. I think there's someone in here.
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288. - Huh?
- I think there's someone in there.
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289. Hey. No, it's okay.
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290. I… I know the feeling,
but there's… there's no one back there.
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291. Why would it be locked?
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292. Here.
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293. See?
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294. I don't know, but sometimes
it's better not to open a locked door,
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295. because there might be something in there
that's not meant for you. Hey, look.
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296. Hey?
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297. Yeah?
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298. I mean, it's not new or nice,
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299. but it was once considered
new and nice. So…
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300. Let's go, buddy.
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301. That's something.
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302. She's not thinking clearly
because of the brain tumor.
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303. You're giving up? That's it?
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304. - Throw in the towel…
- Sorry.
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305. …on a 40-year marriage, on a human life,
on Mom's life, on your family.
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306. You're just… you're done. You give up.
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307. I am not giving up, Nicky.
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308. Uh… in my marriage,
we make decisions together.
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309. I'm not a witness to
your mother's decision. I am a part of it.
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310. I'm standing by my wife.
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311. I'm embracing my last moments with her,
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312. continuing a tradition
that was established by her father.
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313. Sorry, by skinning a dog?
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314. Rachel.
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315. You got engaged.
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316. You called us.
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317. You didn't want to have a big wedding.
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318. You just wanted to do something here
with the family.
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319. Your mother was happy.
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320. She didn't want to ruin your wedding,
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321. so she planned this
for after your wedding.
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322. It is so difficult to get family together,
and this is to be her final celebration.
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323. It is, uh… her dying wish.
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324. And you two are not gonna ruin it for her.
Understood?
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325. This involves all of us.
It's not just her decision.
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326. - Understood?
- Okay, how do I call a family meeting?
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327. - A what?
- A family meeting. How do I call one?
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328. Can I do that?
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329. Again, I'm so sorry
for my misunderstanding.
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330. And maybe I am totally out of line
by doing this,
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331. but I imagine that close families like you
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332. can talk to each other
about your feelings.
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333. I know that I'm new to the family dynamic,
but I've… I've realized that
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334. it was your plan to use our wedding
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335. as a surrogate living funeral.
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336. But because most of you
haven't done much processing,
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337. the wedding has now become
a highly pressurized distraction
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338. from what is really going on.
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339. And I think that maybe we should do
something about it, or else…
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340. we shouldn't have a wedding at all.
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341. Um, she can't do that.
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342. I knew this would happen.
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343. Just let her talk.
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344. It doesn't make sense
to carry on like it's no big deal.
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345. Couching your death inside of our wedding
without talking about it,
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346. it's… it's not going to be what you want.
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347. What do you think? Can we do something
to process all of this? Can we…
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348. Can we try it?
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349. Yeah.
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350. Yeah, let's, um… let's try it, guys.
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351. I don't understand what she's getting at.
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352. Are you suggesting you cancel the wedding
because of our dying mother?
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353. Because that seems a little unfair.
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354. Okay, good.
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355. Uh, no, I'm… I'm not saying that.
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356. I'm saying that I think that we need
a forum for you to say what you feel
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357. ahead of the wedding
so it's not a disaster
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358. and you can all actually
have some peace around it.
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359. I think that was a good start.
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360. - Thank you.
- You're welcome.
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361. You want us to do family therapy
led by you.
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362. No offense, but a stranger, basically.
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363. Well, isn't that what a therapist is?
A stranger?
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364. Are you a therapist?
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365. - She's getting her doctorate.
- Oh, in what?
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366. - Behavioral psychology.
- You're a therapist?
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367. No, I'm a behavioral psychologist.
Uh, almost.
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368. - Have you studied your own behavior?
- Jules…
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369. - Be respectful.
- I am being respectful.
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370. What… what are we gonna do, Rachel?
Sit in a circle and hold hands and cry?
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371. Well, that…
that would be better than nothing. Yeah.
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372. Where are you getting your doctorate?
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373. U of I.
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374. - Oh, I went to Northwestern.
- Cool.
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375. So is there something
you wanna say to your mother
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376. before you no longer have
the opportunity to?
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377. Um… Um…
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378. Go ahead.
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379. Uh…
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380. No.
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381. Okay.
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382. So is there anything
anyone wants to say to Mrs. Cunningham
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383. before she's no longer with us?
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384. Why don't we… why don't we do this?
Why don't we all take some time alone?
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385. Really… really alone. Sit with yourself.
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386. Think about what you want to say
or write it down or be prepared to say it.
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387. Do what you need to do, and then we can…
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388. We can all come back together. Yeah?
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389. That was good. Okay.
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390. Nell, can you come with me?
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391. Yeah.
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392. That was more impressive than you realize.
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393. It's not. It's just very obvious
that they're failing to cope.
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394. No. I meant stealing the spotlight
from Queen V.
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395. I didn't steal it.
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396. Yes. You've only been here two days,
and everyone's doing everything you ask.
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397. She's like…
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398. …sort of a narcissist, isn't she?
Copy !req
399. Sort of? Didn't she just turn your wedding
into her funeral?
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400. Right.
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401. Yeah.
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402. What?
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403. You don't take compliments well.
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404. Sorry, what part of that was a compliment?
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405. - The funeral wedding?
- When I said you were impressive!
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406. Oh my God, that's… Uh…
Who… who does take compliments well?
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407. I take compliments well.
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408. Go ahead.
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409. I don't know, it's, like, kind of a
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410. bad omen to get married
during a death ceremony, so…
Copy !req
411. - Good thing you're not superstitious then.
- Yeah, good thing, good thing.
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412. Good thing I haven't had
this awful feeling ever since I got here
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413. that something bad is gonna happen.
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414. Yeah, but this is a bad thing, isn't it?
Victoria's death.
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415. No, it's… it's something else.
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416. - Okay.
- The feeling hasn't… gone away.
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417. I'll keep an eye out for other bad things.
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418. - There's one.
- Oh.
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419. What?
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420. I was worried that you'd be,
like, an evil bitch who hated me
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421. for marrying your ex, but you're not. So…
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422. Okay.
You don't give compliments well either.
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423. - Thank you.
- You're welcome.
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424. So what the fuck
are we gonna do with this?
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425. Sometimes it's easier to speak truthfully
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426. if you don't have to look
someone in the eye.
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427. - So you will talk to that.
- Gotta be quiet. They're having a meeting.
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428. You'll each go around
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429. and tell it how you feel,
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430. and it will absorb your pain
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431. and grief, and
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432. then we will release it.
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433. Okay.
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434. Who wants to go first?
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435. I can go.
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436. "Victoria."
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437. "You're an incredible woman."
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438. "You are the Cunningham family,
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439. and you will leave a hole in this family
that shouldn't be filled,
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440. not only because it would be impossible
but because this is the end of an era
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441. and it should be honored as one."
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442. "Your presence, strength,
and unwavering courage
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443. have shaped us in ways
we will carry forever."
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444. Um…
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445. I've always, uh, revered you and Dad
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446. and your life together and your marriage
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447. and the way you…
devote yourselves to each other.
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448. And I always wanted
to follow in your footsteps,
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449. and I hope I'm doing that,
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450. because I see the way
that you protect each other,
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451. and you've taught me the value
in understanding someone so well
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452. you know how to shield them from pain.
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453. I know we haven't always
seen eye to eye. Um…
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454. I hope you love me
for my flaws and missteps.
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455. I, uh… I have found a way
to love you for yours.
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456. I love you, Mom, and… and I'll miss you.
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457. The time we missed two days in Santorini
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458. because of my failure to admit
that I'd been wrong…
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459. and missing your 32nd birthday
for an inconsequential business trip.
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460. I am
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461. terribly, terribly sorry.
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462. I will make sure that
my future children know you.
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463. I will make sure
to keep family traditions alive.
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464. I will take care of Somerhouse.
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465. I will make sure
you live on forever in our hearts
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466. and in the hearts of those who knew you.
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467. I know that we only just met, and…
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468. …I'm very sorry to lose you.
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469. You've been such a great mother to Nicky,
and, you know,
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470. I think it's… it's true
what you said about
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471. children absorbing their mothers
and vice versa.
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472. This is the cake Rachel bought
to say sorry
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473. for thinking we're a family of murderers.
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474. Nicky is so loving because of you.
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475. And he's so lucky
that he had you and Dr. Cunningham
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476. to show him where he came from
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477. and how to love and how to be loved.
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478. Why… why is this door open?
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479. I'm so glad
that Nicky absorbed that from you
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480. and that he got to grow up
with this unconditional love.
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481. I can't imagine what that's like.
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482. This is where Papa
honors the dead animals.
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483. He says the dogs can see.
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