1. Good morning, Metropolis.
I'm your host, Lois Lane.
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2. And I'm your co-host, Clark Kent.
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3. And we're here to help make
the start of your day...
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4. just a little bit brighter. Right, Clark?
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5. Right. A little less brighter.
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6. Could we start over?
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7. No problem,
let me know when you're ready.
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8. Great.
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9. I appreciate you helping me audition.
I'm angry you didn't tell me...
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10. how badly Oliver was doing,
but you're here.
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11. So don't make me wish you weren't.
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12. It's okay. You don't need
to get all worked up like you usually do.
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13. Excuse me, Mr. I'm-Slow-And-Steady
And-Know-What's-Best-For-Everyone.
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14. This happens to be important to me.
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15. With newspapers
on the endangered-species list...
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16. news television
is my only backup plan.
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17. Don't you think you can be a little
less dramatic with this whole thing?
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18. You could be more passionate
with this whole thing.
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19. But not you,
not mild-mannered Clark Kent.
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20. - Do you even care if I get this job?
- Of course. I bought a new tie.
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21. - Oh, well, I bought a whole new outfit.
- Yeah, you look great.
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22. - Don't do that.
Do what?
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23. Don't you dare reassure me right now.
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24. Lois, I'm only doing this for you.
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25. How else am I gonna get
that second date?
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26. You should have thought about that
before you stood me up the first time.
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27. Work lights, please.
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28. Thanks guys, that'll do.
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29. Oh, I'm sorry, we weren't...
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30. Really, one more time would be great.
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31. That's it for today.
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32. What do you say you come back
early Monday and give it another whirl?
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33. - You got the job. Congratulations.
- Great.
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34. I guess this means you forgive me?
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35. Well, let's just say I won't forget
about you when I go national.
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36. Actually, we want you both.
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37. I'm sorry?
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38. Oh, no, he's just here to help me.
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39. I am a behind-the-scenes kind of guy.
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40. That's good. That's real.
That's what people want nowadays.
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41. Besides, you two have great chemistry.
Like Hepburn and Tracy, Regis and Kelly.
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42. It's a package deal, guys.
Either you both stay or you both go.
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43. Hey.
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44. From the look on your face, I'm guessing
Good Morning, Metropolis wasn't good.
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45. - Did Lois get the job?
- Yeah. So did I.
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46. They'd only hire us as a team.
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47. How do I get myself into these things?
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48. - So, what's your first story?
- Online dating.
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49. They want us to tape ourselves
on dates set up through the Internet...
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50. - ... then coffee-talk about them on the show.
- Wow.
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51. Tackling morning television
to get back into Lois' good graces.
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52. This has gotta be
one of your bravest moves yet.
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53. As much as I care about Lois,
there's nothing more important...
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54. - ... than finding the Kandorians.
- Clark.
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55. You've been galloping
around the globe...
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56. tracking down every
Kryptonian crop circle we've found.
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57. And every time, the Kandorian
who came with it was long gone.
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58. Doesn't mean I'm gonna stop looking.
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59. I think it's time
to start looking a little closer to home.
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60. Tess has been reinforcing her firewalls.
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61. She cut the feed
to her security cameras.
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62. Given her attraction to all things alien...
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63. You think she's building
her own Area 51.
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64. Let me use Watchtower
to peek at her files.
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65. - I'll see what I can find on my end.
- Clark, you've done everything you can.
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66. You chose to come back to your
Daily Planet double life as a cover.
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67. That's what you need to focus on.
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68. Just for today,
leave the Kandorians to me.
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69. What are these?
- Release forms from KZXP.
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70. They want us to fill them out
before we go on our dates.
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71. I have to get a date.
I'm still filling out my online profile.
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72. If you want matchmakers
to pick a winner...
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73. you really have to be careful
to choose just the right words.
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74. I filled mine out in 10 minutes
this morning.
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75. I guarantee that's the only 10
you're getting out of it.
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76. Well, let's see what you wrote.
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77. All right.
Under "likes" you have the theater.
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78. You mean movie theater.
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79. Details.
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80. Favorite drinks, you have bubbly.
Yeah, if it comes in a six-pack.
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81. I do like a six-pack.
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82. There's nothing about monster trucks.
You love monster-truck rallies.
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83. This is morning television, Clark.
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84. Monster trucks
are not gonna guarantee me a guy...
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85. who will impress the home viewers.
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86. There are a lot of things about you
that would attract a lot of great guys.
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87. Really? Like what?
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88. Uh...
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89. You're Lois.
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90. Thanks, Clark,
but I already filled out my name.
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91. Good luck on your date.
I'm sure you'll sweep her off her feet.
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92. In the face!
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93. Hit him, baby.
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94. Come on.
Hey. Hey.
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95. That's right.
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96. Yeah, all right.
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97. Why you gotta keep making me
hunt you down, Mia?
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98. How are you supposed to pay me back
if you keep running away?
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99. - Rick.
Yeah, come on.
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100. We wouldn't want anything to happen
to that pretty face.
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101. That's your money-maker, baby.
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102. Nice wheels.
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103. Nice leather.
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104. Still, nothing compares
to Aston Martin's original V8 Vantage.
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105. You know your cars.
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106. - Whoo!
- Whoa!
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107. Take it easy, Speedy. I'm trying
to stay away from life in the fast lane.
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108. So why you cruising for company?
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109. I'm not cruising for company, actually.
I was looking for you.
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110. I've seen you fight.
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111. You got speed, strength.
You're talented.
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112. Why do you care?
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113. I'm just somebody
trying to help you fix your life.
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114. That last guy was twice your size.
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115. He kept on beating you down,
you kept coming back after him.
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116. I don't bruise that easily.
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117. Well, maybe not on the outside.
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118. I know what I'm talking about, Mia,
I used to fight for the same reason.
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119. It never mattered
who was standing across from me.
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120. The real battle was with myself.
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121. I can train you.
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122. I can teach you
how to overcome your fear...
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123. all that hate in your heart,
and get you off the streets.
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124. Oh, my hero.
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125. So, what's this help gonna cost me,
hero?
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126. Just a little time.
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127. Time enough for me to prove to you
that you can trust me.
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128. Look, I can handle any hacker, okay?
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129. But you should know, someone's
trying to get through to us right now...
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130. - ... and I think they're pretty good, so...
- Then be better.
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131. Fix the situation, Stuart.
Or I'll have you terminated.
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132. Okay, by "terminated" though,
you mean fired, right?
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133. Right?
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134. Thank you all for coming today.
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135. For years,
I've tried to steer LuthorCorp...
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136. towards more
environmentally-conscious projects.
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137. I just had to prove that going green...
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138. also meant going up
on the stock exchange.
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139. Thanks to cutting-edge technology
we've acquired...
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140. through our new partnership
with RAO Incorporated...
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141. I believe this project
will put LuthorCorp on top...
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142. Metropolis on the map
and our planet back on course.
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143. I give you the world's first
completely self-sustaining solar tower.
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144. This one tower will generate enough
clean energy to power all of Metropolis.
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145. Bravo, Tess.
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146. Congratulations on
an exceptionally well-realized effort.
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147. Mr. Zod.
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148. I never expected to see you here.
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149. Oh, interesting.
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150. Seeing as I am now chairman
and CEO of RAO.
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151. Please, please. Hold your applause.
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152. Save it for the real hero,
our stunning hostess, Tess Mercer.
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153. And by taking on this project,
she is making my simple dream...
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154. of harnessing the powers of the sun
a reality.
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155. So here's to Tess Mercer...
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156. Hear, hear.
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157. I swear to you all,
this tower will change the world.
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158. Okay, Clark, sound check time.
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159. Say, "One, two, three."
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160. One, two, three?
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161. Put it in your ear first, big guy.
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162. Tap it once to turn it on.
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163. One, two, three.
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164. Thanks.
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165. Wow, Smallville, talk about green.
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166. Like your first day at the Daily Planet
all over again.
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167. This mean I'm about to hear
Lois Lane's rules of online dating?
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168. There really is only one rule
when it comes to dating, Clark...
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169. show up. Like after you ask someone
to a monster-truck rally...
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170. it's a good idea
to show up to the date.
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171. Maybe we should talk about this
when we're not being taped.
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172. Okay, Clark,
let's talk about something else.
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173. - Like your online dating profile.
- But that was supposed to be private.
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174. Well, I'll give you this,
you definitely were honest.
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175. Admitting you grew up on a farm...
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176. is either going to get you
a date with country mouse...
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177. or a cougar
looking for her next meal.
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178. Hi, Clark. Uh, I'm Catherine.
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179. Or not.
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180. - Hello, Catherine.
- Hi.
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181. - Uh, have a seat.
Okay.
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182. Uh...
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183. I've seen these blind-date shows
on television before...
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184. but I never actually thought
I would go on one.
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185. This isn't live, is it?
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186. Uh, they're taping it
to air it some other time.
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187. If you can't take the heat, sister,
get out of the café.
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188. Sorry, I have this really annoying
ringing in my ear.
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189. Oh, I understand.
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190. I'm nervous too. I can barely hear
anything over my own heartbeat.
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191. Oh, please.
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192. Just try to treat this
like any other date.
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193. That's the problem, I'm kind of busy
so I don't go on dates much.
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194. What is it that keeps you so busy?
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195. Well, until recently, I was overseas.
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196. Skiing in Switzerland,
modeling in Milan.
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197. Where I was working
in the Peace Corps.
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198. But then I decided to come to Metropolis
to take my Ph.D.
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199. I couldn't decide between sociology
or social justice.
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200. So I'm doing both.
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201. Is she for real?
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202. Congratulations, Clark...
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203. you're dating Mother Teresa
in 6-inch heels.
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204. Great.
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205. You're welcome.
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206. I didn't thank you.
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207. Well, you should.
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208. Because while your teams were out
scouring the globe, failing to find us...
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209. I was using our considerably evolved
intelligence to make LuthorCorp...
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210. the most technologically-advanced
company on Earth.
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211. The question is,
what do you want in return?
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212. Someone who betrayed us.
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213. The one you call the Blur.
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214. I'm flattered you think
of the people on this planet...
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215. that I'd know how to find the Blur,
but...
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216. Hmm...
You disappoint me, Tess.
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217. But I'll play your game.
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218. The Blur's blood
was used as an antidote...
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219. to a virus that swept through
Metropolis weeks ago.
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220. We were able to get a sample
of that blood.
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221. We took it to the lab to be tested.
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222. Instead,
every last drop had been destroyed.
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223. At your request.
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224. What are you talking about?
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225. Since you chose
to destroy the Blur's blood samples...
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226. I'm guessing
you're trying to protect him.
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227. Maybe for some altruistic reasons...
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228. or maybe you wanted to use him
as a bargaining chip.
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229. I helped free your people
from that orb...
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230. because I'd hoped
you'd save humanity from itself.
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231. But the only way I can make sure
that happens is if we're equal partners.
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232. No human will ever stand
on equal footing with a Kandorian.
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233. Make her tell you where this Blur is...
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234. or kill her.
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235. Yes, major.
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236. - Ollie, I need your help.
- Not a good time, Lois.
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237. You know how Clark and I have this side
job hosting Good Morning, Metropolis?
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238. Uh, Clark Kent's hosting
morning television?
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239. I can't wait to watch him
show me how to bake a cake.
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240. Well, our first report does has some heat
but it's not about baking.
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241. They've set us both up on blind dates.
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242. Clark's on a blind date?
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243. Talk about footage of a train wreck.
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244. Well, you might wanna save the space
on your DVR, because here's the kicker.
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245. He did great.
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246. You wanna be better.
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247. That's why I'm here.
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248. - I need you to tell me my red flags.
- Red flags?
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249. Anything about me that annoyed you
while we were together.
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250. I bought a dress,
reserved the Ace of Clubs...
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251. but if I don't identify
my deal-breakers...
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252. they're gonna cancel
before it gets to air.
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253. Call it selective memory,
or a short attention span...
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254. but I only remember
the good things.
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255. Like how you used to brush your hair
back when you were nervous...
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256. or used to call out football plays
in your sleep.
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257. Thanks for the workout, Ollie,
but time's up.
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258. Do you think you could pay me
in smaller bills?
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259. Nice towel, honey.
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260. Where will she put the money?
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261. Um...
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262. See the thing is,
we were just sparring.
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263. Don't worry, I'm not here to judge.
I just kind of hoped...
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264. you'd spend more than one week clean
before you got back in the gutter.
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265. - Uh...
- Sorry I interrupted your sparring.
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266. It's... Lois.
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267. Finally.
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268. Another firewall?
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269. That's right, my hapless hacker,
you have been served.
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270. What? Already? Damn, you are fast.
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271. Okay,
I see your anonymous proxy filter...
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272. with your reinforced
protocol encryption...
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273. and I raise you one rewritten ACL.
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274. Denied.
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275. Okay. Now you've made me angry.
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276. - You said no strings attached.
- I'm not trying to sleep with you.
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277. But if you think a pebble in your shoe
is painful...
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278. wait till you feel
what a $50,000 watch will do.
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279. Thank you.
Why don't you look around?
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280. Why would you wanna
go back on the streets?
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281. You don't get it.
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282. If I can finish paying off
what I owe Rick, I'm done. I'm free.
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283. Well, how much do you owe Rick?
I'll cover it.
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284. And then I'd owe you.
I don't think so.
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285. - I'm not that kind of guy...
- Don't tell me about types, okay?
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286. I know them all. Rick's type, your type,
political types, twisted types.
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287. And I'm sick of all of you.
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288. Well, I'm not gonna
trap you here, Mia.
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289. I would just like to see you do something
with your life that you can be proud of.
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290. Why would you help someone like me?
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291. Because I know what it feels like
to be stuck in a place...
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292. that you feel
there's no escape from.
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293. And my friends...
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294. helped me find the way out.
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295. If I stay...
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296. it's gonna cost you.
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297. Way ahead of you.
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298. I went ahead and had my staff
buy you some clothes.
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299. I'm sure you'll find
something in there you like.
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300. Oh, and hey,
hope you dress as fast as you drive...
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301. because I'm gonna need you
to drop me off somewhere.
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302. - You got anything stronger?
- Of course.
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303. The last thing you need is a drink, Lois.
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304. Thanks, Clark. You sound like
my mother on prom night.
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305. How do I look?
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306. If this were a prom,
you'd be crowned queen.
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307. Your date's a lucky man.
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308. Do I detect a note of jealousy
from the notoriously nice Clark Kent?
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309. Careful my date doesn't hear you.
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310. He might have to take you down.
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311. I'd like to see him try.
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312. You know what they say,
all's fair in love and war.
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313. What's it gonna be for us, Lois,
love or war?
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314. Clark, it sounds like you're asking me out
on another date.
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315. If I was, would you say yes?
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316. I'll tell you what I'd say...
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317. Oliver?
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318. What are you doing?
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319. Well, you wanted this television
tryst to make an impression, right, Lois?
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320. My blind date is with you?
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321. Well, technically your blind date's leaving
in the elevator.
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322. I paid him to go seek
his 15 minutes of fame somewhere else.
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323. You tell Smiley,
he shows up late one more time...
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324. he's gonna go home in a box.
You understand me?
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325. Yeah, I got it.
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326. I wasn't sure you'd show up, princess.
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327. This should finish paying off
what I owe you.
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328. It belongs to Oliver Queen.
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329. He's probably got 20 of these things.
Guy's richer than the Luthors.
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330. Safe bet says he's got a safe
stuffed with cash someplace.
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331. Which is why I want you to show us
where you dropped him off tonight.
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332. - Rick...
- You honestly think I would let you go?
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333. Mia, honey,
you're my top earner, baby.
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334. So you remember,
you run, I will find you.
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335. You move to another city,
my friends will hunt you down.
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336. No second chances, okay?
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337. Wow, uh...
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338. I always kind of took you
for a beer girl.
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339. No, no, only the finer things in life
for Lois Lane.
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340. Oh, yes. Right. Of course.
Then a toast.
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341. Let's not.
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342. Oliver, it's bad enough that I catch you
dragging yourself through the mud again.
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343. But now you're bound and determined
to ruin my date?
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344. Okay, that meeting you walked in on?
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345. That was someone
I was actually helping.
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346. Well, you obviously helped her
out of her clothes.
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347. Very funny.
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348. I'm not here to sabotage you, I thought
your audience might want a date...
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349. with Metropolis' most eligible
billionaire bachelor. That'd be me.
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350. I guess it wouldn't hurt the ratings.
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351. Okay, you've got 10 minutes
to explain yourself.
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352. Well, I'm only gonna need one.
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353. Because there's really only one reason
why I came here.
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354. I never finished saying
what it is that I loved about you.
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355. Oh, okay.
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356. Lois, what's going on?
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357. I don't know.
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358. Let me just skip to the end.
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359. The thing I love about you the most
is that you're still in my life.
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360. Because you're still in my heart.
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361. Check, please.
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362. Lois? Lois?
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363. Sorry, Clark.
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364. Couldn't this have waited
until the cameras were off?
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365. No. I'm not hiding my feelings
anymore, Lois.
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366. I figured by saying all that stuff with the
cameras on, I could prove that to you.
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367. I had no idea
you still had such strong feelings.
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368. You know,
I went to a really dark place, Lois.
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369. And I think it took going there
and coming back to realize...
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370. you're the best part of my life.
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371. I love you, Oliver...
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372. as a dear friend.
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373. Which is why
I have to be totally honest with you.
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374. Clark.
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375. Yes.
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376. I'm happy you know what you want.
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377. I guess it just hurts
knowing it's not me.
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378. I am so sorry.
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379. Good night, Lois.
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380. Oliver.
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381. Hi.
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382. I said I was your friend and I meant it.
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383. I am not going to let you wander
down any more dark alleys.
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384. Thank you.
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385. But you don't have to worry
about me, Lois.
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386. I'm all about embracing life right now.
I'm not trying to end it.
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387. - Good.
You know what I mean?
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388. Trying to take
the right kind of chances.
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389. You, my friend,
were definitely a chance worth taking.
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390. Thank you.
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391. Is towel girl your driver now?
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392. Maybe your plan B?
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393. Very funny. Uh, her name is Mia.
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394. And, come on, I'll introduce you.
For real this time.
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395. Mia.
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396. Hey, Mia.
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397. I'm sorry.
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398. Oliver.
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399. Ah, ah.
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400. What's your hurry?
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401. Oh, hey. Great work today.
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402. Have you seen the new marketing ad?
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403. I have high hopes for you two.
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404. So did I.
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405. You said you wouldn't hurt him.
Back in the car, Mia.
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406. Tell me you didn't pick
Prince Charming here over Oliver.
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407. Shut up and get in your carriage,
Cinderella.
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408. Get off of me!
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409. Pretty boy's worth billions,
but you're not worth the headache.
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410. I can't let you do this.
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411. Check this out,
streetwalker thinks she's a street fighter.
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412. - What are you gonna do, Mia?
- Stay where you are.
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413. You gonna gun me down?
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414. You don't have it in you.
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415. You're no hero.
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416. Go. Go.
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417. Come on, let's go. Go. Go.
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418. Oliver.
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419. Lois.
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420. Come on.
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421. You will respect me.
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422. Leave me alone.
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423. I'm afraid I can't do that.
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424. Excuse me?
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425. I had to wait until we were locked down
for the night...
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426. so we won't be interrupted.
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427. You're Kandorian?
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428. And I have a message from Major Zod.
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429. Tell me where the Blur is...
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430. or you die.
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431. - You find a lead on the Kandorian?
- I've run every play in my playbook...
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432. to try and access Tess' files but
she's got one hell of a defensive line.
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433. The good news is
I've only counted 100 firewalls...
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434. so I think
I'm actually about to score.
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435. Greetings,
estimable foe, whoever you are.
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436. Now, I'm guessing,
since you've made it this far...
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437. you probably haven't slept
and your fingers are getting cramped up.
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438. So I thought I would take it upon myself
to do you a big favor...
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439. and just say, "Give up."
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440. I can do this all day and all night.
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441. I'm sure you already get the picture.
So talk to the hand.
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442. Hello, hand.
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443. Stuart Campbell, graduate of MIT,
talk to these hands.
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444. Nice work, Chloe.
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445. So it looks like Stuart Campbell
is Tess' tech boy wonder.
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446. And he has done some pretty
heavyweight hacking of his own.
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447. Government databases, corporations.
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448. Wow, we could do a lot
with this kind of leverage.
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449. Maybe even get him to join us.
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450. You'd even match.
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451. Clark, this guy is so good, every time I'd
get close, he'd show up and block me.
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452. I know the feeling.
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453. Lois and Oliver. Seeing him with her,
it's been a long time...
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454. - ... since he looked that happy.
- Clark, just stop, okay?
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455. Your willingness to sacrifice yourself
for others is a great strength for sure.
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456. But when it comes to your own
happiness, it's a weakness.
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457. Oliver's been through a lot,
and we're friends.
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458. Lois is not up for auction.
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459. Look, for once,
try not to second guess things.
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460. All you have to do is ask yourself,
what do you want?
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461. - Lois.
- Did you hear?
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462. The brilliant brass at KZXP have decided
to go with someone else for their show.
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463. - Lois...
- After Ollie and I almost got killed...
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464. guess who they've decided
to go with.
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465. Apparently blonds test better
with morning viewers.
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466. - Lois.
- I'm sorry.
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467. I never should have tried out,
or dragged you there with me...
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