Skylanders Academy 3x3

1. Yes! Ha, ha!

2. Welcome back to the 10th Annual Skylands Awards.

3. Once again, your host, Hugo.

4. - Thank you.

5. And now, for the final award of the day,

6. Protector of the Year.

7. The nominees are—

8. Gary Skylandersson for bravely staying home from work when he had a cold.

9. The Unknown Troll Comic for his charity stand-up special.

10. - And, of course, the Skylanders for...

11. well, just about everything they do.

12. And the winner is Gary Sky—

13. Oh, sorry, wrong card.

14. It's the Skylanders!

15. This is the 10th nomination

16. and 10th win for the Skylanders in this category.

17. In this time of uncertainty, with danger looming ahead,

18. it's good to know everyone still believes in the Skylanders.

19. And now, some excited words from the team.

20. This is really a great honor...

21. again.

22. I'm using the trophies from the first four wins as paperweights,

23. but I guess I could always use another.

24. To save time, here's my speech from last year.

25. Thanks.

26. What an honor.

27. I— I just have so many people I want to thank.

28. In alphabetical order,

29. - What? - Oh, sorry, Jet.

30. Sounds like they're playing you off. That's the music.

31. Listen, folks. Brass tacks. We're all only here for the after-party,

32. so let's wrap things up before I get hangry.

33. We appreciate the award,

34. and rest assured, so long as the Skylanders are here—

35. which, really, who knows how long that'll be for?

36. Ahem— but until then, the Skylands have nothing to be fearful of.

37. Uh, except for that.

38. I'd bet you anything this was the work of Bomb Shell.

39. That totally makes sense.

40. I mean, his name has the word "bomb" in it.

41. I wouldn't be so sure about that.

42. I analyzed this rock sample from the destroyed island

43. and found traces of ammonium nitrate.

44. But Bomb Shell is known for using traptanium as an incendiary.

45. How are you so knowledgeable about these things?

46. I am an explosives expert. Why do you think they call me "Kaboom"?

47. I always thought it was a family name.

48. We appreciate the input,

49. but I think the Protectors of the Year have got this.

50. Now last I heard, Bomb Shell was locked up in Cloudcracker Prison.

51. So this means he must've escaped.

52. Then let's get to Cloudcracker tout suite and investigate.

53. Spyro, you're on point.

54. You know, I'm...

55. I'm still not feeling a hundred percent.

56. So why don't you guys all leave and I'll stay at the Academy by myself?

57. - That is a great idea, Jet Vac. - Huh?

58. - Uh, yes. Why, thank you. - Hmm.

59. Well, we can't go on a mission like this one Skylander short.

60. I will accompany you.

61. Kaboom, you're a heck of a security guard, but maybe you should leave this one to us.

62. No, the last thing the Academy needs now is more security.

63. Kaboom will be an indispensable addition to the team.

64. Good thinking, Jet Vac.

65. Why, I am just full of good ideas today.

66. All right, Kaboom. I guess you're coming with us.

67. Whew!

68. I'm growing weary of asking you the same question.

69. Have you just been waiting in here for me all day?

70. Have you located the Map to Arkus yet?

71. Cool your evil heels, Stryks.

72. Those Sky-bland-ers are off on some foolhardy mission.

73. I've got the whole place to myself.

74. And you know what they say about what happens when the cat's away.

75. No.

76. Yeah, me neither. That's why I asked.

77. But in any event, there's only one place Eon can be keeping it.

78. The Relics Room.

79. A little dark magic to break down the door and the map is as good as mine.

80. Perfect. And then it will be as good as mine.

81. Stop wasting time and find a way into that room.

82. Maybe if there wasn't always a giant, disembodied head floating in my room,

83. I could get some work done.

84. Wha—?

85. Master Eon?

86. Hello-oo?

87. Time to open that Relics Room door.

88. Hmm. This is gonna be even easier than I thought.

89. Map to Arkus, here I come.

90. You've changed.

91. Oh, I'm the one who's changed?

92. Ever since you came back into— ah, Spyro!

93. Oh, I didn't see you there. Why, you look good.

94. Looks like someone left the door open.

95. What are you doing in here, Spyro?

96. Ah. You've been thinking about your ancestors again.

97. Yep. How'd you guess?

98. I can see from the tears in your eyes just how important finding them is to you.

99. No, you're stepping on my tail.

100. Oh, my bad.

101. Truthfully, I'm kind of over the whole "finding my ancestors" thing,

102. so I should probably be on my way.

103. Now I know you're just saying that to make me feel better.

104. But with the two of us working together, never leaving each other's sides,

105. we'll find a way to them.

106. Didn't you hear him? He said it wasn't a big deal. Let it go.

107. Oh, and it's just so easy for you to let things go, isn't it? Mm-hmm?

108. Yeah, no, this is weird.

109. I'm... I'm gonna go.

110. No, no, no. Stay, stay.

111. Kaossandra and I are just having some difficulty

112. readjusting to life under the same roof again.

113. Ah— perhaps you could help settle an important argument.

114. What is the best way to get to Tuk's Emporium?

115. Now, I say you take Route 17 to the parkway to—

116. The parkway is always backed up before Exit 163.

117. Directions? That's the important argument?

118. Mm-hmm. What do you think?

119. I think that that's a pretty silly thing for two people to be arguing about.

120. You're right. What we need is a third person

121. to act as objective mediator. Brilliant idea.

122. Well, thank you for volunteering, Spyro.

123. Wait. No, no, no.

124. I don't know what you expect to find.

125. Ever since all the Doom Raiders were recaptured,

126. the prison's tightened security.

127. I even came out of retirement to help.

128. So if Bomb Shell had escaped, I think I'd know about it.

129. Nothing gets by me. Isn't that right, Berserker?

130. Here he is, still safe and sound.

131. I was sure Bomb Shell was behind the island explosion.

132. Oh— why not stay a while? I'm an explosives expert.

133. I can help on your case in exchange for some upgrades in here.

134. Like a toilet. I've been holding it in for months.

135. What do you think this is, Buckingham Palace?

136. So if it wasn't Bomb Shell, who could be responsible for this?

137. Thought you'd never ask.

138. I'm the one responsible for blowing that island into rubble.

139. But the game has only just begun.

140. To find the location of my next target, you must solve this riddle.

141. What has no beginning, no middle and no end?

142. And don't dawdle. The clock is ticking.

143. Metaphorically, I mean. I'm using a digital clock. It's silent.

144. Hmm. I'm stumped!

145. Something with no beginning, no middle, no end?

146. - Ah! A really bad movie. A circle.

147. Shh. Not now, Kaboom. We're trying to think.

148. - Hmm. What could it be? - A circle.

149. Maybe it's a trick question. Like, there is no real answer.

150. Oh, man. This riddle is unsolvable!

151. Circle.

152. - Why must you keep repeating that? - That's the answer. A circle.

153. Oh-hh!

154. I still don't get it.

155. How did you know that?

156. Being a security guard is very boring. I kill time by reading brainteasers.

157. I also enjoy historical romance novels.

158. That's it.

159. The next target is that fancy, new restaurant in town. Le Circle.

160. You know it's fancy because it has "Le" before the name.

161. Then, Skylanders, we're off to Le Circle.

162. We still have a deal, right? Hello?

163. We need to evacuate the restaurant.

164. Now, from my experience, it's best to do it calmly and quietly.

165. Let the pros handle this. I know just the trick.

166. Will you look at that? There's a cockroach in this man's soup.

167. I am so glad you are taken with our daily special.

168. Cockroach Bisque, a very expensive delicacy.

169. But nowhere near as expensive as the rest of our menu.

170. Ahem.

171. What do you mean you're not accepting coupons today?

172. - Aw, you're kidding. That's outrageous.

173. Oh, man. I'm never coming here again.

174. Congratulations, Skylanders. You've completed the first challenge.

175. Now here comes the second.

176. Oh, man. I didn't know math was gonna be involved.

177. Beneath this table is an explosive device

178. large enough to blow this restaurant to kingdom come.

179. That is, unless you can create a delicious meal

180. out of the following ingredients—

181. ketchup, shoelaces, baby powder, and Muenster cheese.

182. Ugh! I loathe Muenster.

183. You have two minutes, starting... now.

184. Okay, team, we've got this. I'll slice and dice.

185. - I'll add some seasoning. - And I'll cook it al dente.

186. Guys, it would be much faster if you just let me defuse the bomb.

187. Uh-uh. We Skylanders go by the book.

188. And now for the final taste test. The maître d' will do the honors.

189. Hmm. It's weird.

190. It's pretentious.

191. It barely even resembles food.

192. I love it!

193. - You've completed the challenge. Whoo!

194. Now for your next challenge...

195. Something about this doesn't seem right. It's a little too easy.

196. It's not too easy. We're just that good.

197. Also, we'll take this to go.

198. And don't even get him started on laundry.

199. You know why? Because he never starts it.

200. If you want, I can stop doing my laundry altogether.

201. You'd like that, wouldn't you?

202. This way, you can spend more time on your fantasy sheepball league.

203. Why don't we ask our mediator? What do you think, Spyro?

204. Me? Uh, well, I think...

205. we should try a teambuilding exercise.

206. It's called "Has Anyone Seen the Map to Arkus?"

207. Eon, you go first.

208. No thanks. I don't really like to exercise.

209. Of course you don't.

210. Just like you don't really like to empty the dishwasher.

211. Or really like to clean up your beard trimmings.

212. You leave my beard out of this.

213. Face it. You're just upset because I don't agree with you about Kaos.

214. - That's what this is really about. - That's what this is really about?

215. If you just listened to me, you would realize I broke through to him.

216. The way you stick up for him, it's like he's hypnotized you.

217. That's it. I know exactly how to get to the bottom of this.

218. Hypnotherapy.

219. I'll induce hypnosis by using a trigger word

220. to get to the root of your problems.

221. I'm sorry, "trigger word"?

222. It's a word you use to put someone into another state of mind.

223. One time at the county fair, I saw this hypnotist bring a guy on stage.

224. And just by saying the word "sheep,"

225. he triggered the guy into thinking he actually was a sheep.

226. I also ate my weight in funnel cake.

227. Trigger words, states of mind, funnel cake?

228. How fascinating!

229. Okay, Spyro, work your magic on us.

230. When I say the word "release," you will both fall into a deep hypnotic state.

231. Ready?

232. Release.

233. Good.

234. Now that you're under my command, I want you to bring me the Map to Arkus.

235. Here you are, the magic carpet.

236. No, not a magic carpet. The Map to Arkus.

237. Not matching parkas. The Map to Arkus.

238. "What's black when you buy it, red when you use it,

239. and gray when you throw it away?"

240. Uh, guys, have you noticed that—?

241. One second, Kaboom. We're trying to concentrate.

242. Oh, I've got it. It's—

243. - Charcoal!

244. - I was going to answer that. Hmm.

245. You know you look just like charcoal when you get mad?

246. If this coconut measures three cups, and this one measures five cups,

247. we need to pour water from this one into this one.

248. Doesn't it seem like we're moving further and further away from the Academy?

249. - Almost like we're being lured. Oh, I got it.

250. Pour the three-cup coconut into the five, then we refill the three.

251. Pour two into the five, which leaves one cup left.

252. Then empty all five cups and pour the one from the three into the five.

253. Refill the three again and pour into the five,

254. bringing the total cups of water in that coconut to...

255. - Uh...?

256. - Four cups. Huh?

257. "What disappears the moment you say its name?"

258. My father.

259. Stealth Elf! She's always disappearing.

260. I'm a teleporter. That's what I do.

261. - Hey, guys, I really think we should— - Well, that's it. We're done for.

262. - Kaboom, we need you to defuse the bomb. - No thanks. I'll pass.

263. What do you mean you'll pass?

264. You guys have been ignoring me all day

265. because you're too caught up with winning that award to ask for help.

266. If I were you, I'd duck.

267. Well, I hate to say "I told you so," but I love to say "See?"

268. You knew the bomb wasn't real?

269. - How? - Because I'm an expert.

270. I was trying to tell you there was no fuse on the device.

271. Also, silence!

272. No one said anything.

273. No, that was the answer to the riddle. "Silence."

274. Oh-hh!

275. Looks like you're going home with another award.

276. Suckers of the Year!

277. Yes, it is I, your favorite bad guy.

278. And guess what?

279. I made you jump through every one of my little hoops,

280. and it was all just a distraction.

281. A distraction from what?

282. Snapshot.

283. Skylanders, we need your help.

284. Cloudcracker is under attack by Kaos.

285. And he's in some kind of pirate ship.

286. Kaboom was right. This mission was just a decoy

287. to get us as far away from Cloudcracker as possible.

288. - We'll be there as soon as we can. - As far away as we are now...

289. I'm afraid that won't be soon enough.

290. I don't care that you got that cap from Marcus.

291. I am looking for the Map to Arkus!

292. All right, Kaossandra, you're excused.

293. Go reward yourself with a nice, long nap.

294. And when you wake up, you won't remember any of this.

295. Now, listen to me.

296. There is a map that leads to the Island of Arkus.

297. That map is somewhere in the Academy. Where is the map?

298. Oh, the Map to Arkus.

299. Why didn't you say that in the first place?

300. So you know where it is?

301. The map was hidden by King Pen's long line of Master Senseis,

302. so I am not privy to its location.

303. Of course you're not.

304. But I'd wager if the map is anywhere, it's in the vault.

305. Wait, there's a vault?

306. It's where all the most precious items in the Academy are kept.

307. Here, I'll show you.

308. Oh, yes, yes.

309. The vault is voice-activated

310. and can only be opened when I recite the password.

311. - Uh-huh. And the password is? - My favorite nursery rhyme.

312. "Little Miss Muffet."

313. That poor girl.

314. She just wanted to eat her curds and whey in peace.

315. I have to say I prefer "Baa Baa Black Sheep" myself.

316. - But, hey, whatever it takes to open—

317. - Oh, no. Trigger word.

318. Wait, come back!

319. Just one quick "Little Miss Muffet" and then you can go graze with the flock!

320. You're too late. The guards went after him.

321. But Kaos sprung all the Doom Raiders from their cells.

322. Well, he left Broccoli Guy. But who could blame him?

323. - Hey, we lost Kaboom.

324. It's been fun, Skylanders. Thanks for playing.

325. - And here's your consolation prize.

326. Where's the bathroom?

327. I've gotta say, this is a pretty crummy prize.

328. "Protectors of the Year"? We couldn't even protect ourselves.

329. Well, if we're going down, we're going down swinging.

330. - Okay, everybody, freeze.

331. This is a highly volatile explosive device.

332. I'm prepared to let it go off and take us all out,

333. unless you get back in your cells right now.

334. - Oh, you don't believe me?

335. Go ahead, make your move.

336. Then it's hasta la vista, Mabu.

337. Pleasure doing business with you.

338. That was some quick thinking, Kaboom.

339. Yeah, we totally would've been dog meat if not for you.

340. Sorry we kept ignoring your help all day.

341. I guess maybe winning that award went to our heads.

342. That was so cool

343. how you made them think that dud was a real bomb.

344. Yeah, just happy to help.

345. Whoops.

346. The last thing I remember was being on the couch with Kaossandra

347. and then, nothing.

348. All I know is I have an intense craving for grass.

349. Yeah, don't know anything about that.

350. I'm sorry for how awkward it's been since I've returned.

351. From now on, if there's something bothering me,

352. I'm just going to be upfront and talk to you about it.

353. Kaossandra, please. I'm the one who should be apologizing.

354. I know what Kaos means to you.

355. And if you think he can be turned to the side of good,

356. then by my holy beard, I believe he can, too.

357. There. See? Progress.

358. I'm proud of the both of you.

359. And you know what I think would be the perfect cap to this day?

360. Tour of the vault inside the Relics Room.

361. What do you say, Master Eon?

362. Well, it seems rather unorthodox to allow anyone else in there, but—

363. Master Eon, we have some grave news.

364. - Kaos was behind the explosion.

365. He broke all the Doom Raiders out of Cloudcracker Prison

366. to work as a crew on his pirate ship.

367. My Kaos is a pirate now?

368. I guess this means I was right all along.

369. Kaos still is on the side of evil.

370. It's not about who's right and who's wrong.

371. It's about saving Kaos!

372. I know that. Don't you think I know that?

373. How do I know what you know? Can I see inside your head?

374. - What's going on? - You don't wanna know.

375. You talk in your sleep. "I wish he'd trim his beard.

376. I wish he'd trim his beard." Well, I'm not trimming my beard!