1. the greatness of human
accomplishment has always
been measured by size.Copy !req
2. The bigger, the better.Copy !req
3. Until now.Copy !req
4. Nanotech.Copy !req
5. Smart cars.Copy !req
6. Small is the new big.Copy !req
7. In the coming months,
hooli will deliver nucleus,Copy !req
8. The most sophisticated
compression software platform
the world has ever seen.Copy !req
9. Because if we can make your
audio and video files smaller,Copy !req
10. We can make cancer smaller.
And hunger. And aids.Copy !req
11. what an asshole.Copy !req
12. Why would he announce it
so far ahead of
the actual rollout?Copy !req
13. No one does that.Copy !req
14. He's got to be doing it
just to fuck with us, right?Copy !req
15. I actually think we're ok.
The player I gave themCopy !req
16. Was from a retired
repository that was audio only.Copy !req
17. Video compression is a
completely different paradigm.Copy !req
18. What they have is like
pied piper, but not as good.Copy !req
19. - People will see that.
- Not if they get to market
before us.Copy !req
20. Inferior products
win out all the time.Copy !req
21. Like Jesus over satan.Copy !req
22. I was going to say
vhs over beta.Copy !req
23. Ok, well, actually this
is a superior product,
right here.Copy !req
24. Is it a margarita machine?Copy !req
25. It's better.Copy !req
26. My first official purchase
as ceo of pied piper.Copy !req
27. That's not really
our logo is it?Copy !req
28. It looks like
a guy sucking a dickCopy !req
29. And he's got another
dick tucked behind
his ear for later.Copy !req
30. - Like a snack dick. It does.
- No, it's... It's pied pipe...Copy !req
31. Here, put them on.Copy !req
32. Gilfoyle, come on.Copy !req
33. I don't want it.Copy !req
34. Jared, I bought these
t-shirts with my credit cardCopy !req
35. But I think I'm close
to being maxed out, so...Copy !req
36. Yeah, um, we may have
a little problem there.Copy !req
37. Peter gregory's check. So?Copy !req
38. So, it's made out
to "pied piper incorporated,"Copy !req
39. I checked with
the secretary of state website,Copy !req
40. And there's already a "pied
piper" operating in california.Copy !req
41. So we need to change our name.Copy !req
42. - Thank god!
- Praise the dark lord,
that's great news.Copy !req
43. No, it's not great news.
We love the name pied piper.Copy !req
44. It's a classic fairy tale.Copy !req
45. Well, I looked it up.Copy !req
46. It's about
a predatory flautistCopy !req
47. Who murders children
in a cave.Copy !req
48. It has all of that going for it,
richard, and I still hate it.Copy !req
49. Richard,
if we are going to change
the name, we need to do it now.Copy !req
50. Names stick. My name's only
jared because gavin called me
that on my first day.Copy !req
51. My real name is donald.Copy !req
52. But, jared,
we already bought the t-shirts.Copy !req
53. I can't take these back.
It was an online order.Copy !req
54. What is that atrocity?Copy !req
55. What are we, an irish
pornography company?Copy !req
56. I thought we were gonna replace
the name "pied piper."Copy !req
57. I thought it was a place holder.Copy !req
58. "placeholder" would honestly be
a better name than pied piper.Copy !req
59. Richard, I've actually been
holding off telling people
I'm the co-founderCopy !req
60. Of "pied piper" because frankly,Copy !req
61. It's a little embarrassing.Copy !req
62. Well, um, just to remind you,
you are not the co-founder.Copy !req
63. So please don't tell anyone.Copy !req
64. Richard, take aviato.
That's not a name I found,
it's a name that found meCopy !req
65. On a vision quest.Copy !req
66. Something that you should do.Copy !req
67. No, no. I'm not gonna eat
a bunch of drugsCopy !req
68. And sit out in the desert,Copy !req
69. And hope some name
randomly pops in my head.Copy !req
70. Well, then I question
your leadership.Copy !req
71. Richard, a name
defines a company.Copy !req
72. It has to be something primal,
something that you can scream
out during intercourse.Copy !req
73. Like aviato.Copy !req
74. uuuuber!Copy !req
75. gooooogle!Copy !req
76. huuuuuulu!Copy !req
77. Exactly, right.
pied piper!Copy !req
78. I'm so sorry. Your voice doesn't
really reach that register when
you ejaculate, does it?Copy !req
79. No, it's just, everyone was
doing it, I was just chiming in.Copy !req
80. You guys,
we can't change our name.Copy !req
81. I can't go into peter gregory's
office with a new name,Copy !req
82. And ask him to cut me
a new check.Copy !req
83. I mean, he's pulled funding
from companies for a lot less.Copy !req
84. Uh, the pied piper name and
trademark are registered to
a sprinkler company in gilroy.Copy !req
85. I guess you could head out there
and talk to them.Copy !req
86. - But they may refuse...
- Ok. No, no, no.
I'll negotiate with them.Copy !req
87. No offense, richard, but you're
not a strong negotiator.Copy !req
88. - I'm a great negotiator,
dinesh.
- You're a terrible negotiator.Copy !req
89. I'm a decent negotiator.Copy !req
90. Just, so...Copy !req
91. Oh, peter, you're here. Uh...Copy !req
92. We were supposed to meet
40 minutes ago with the guys
from astraphileCopy !req
93. About the emergency
capital injection.Copy !req
94. As we discussed,
our north carolina plant
went sideways.Copy !req
95. So we need 15 million now
or we'll have to shut down.Copy !req
96. Have any of you ever
eaten at "burger king"?Copy !req
97. Yes...Copy !req
98. Why?Copy !req
99. Well, I was just
driven past one.Copy !req
100. And while I know
their market cap is
seven billion dollars-plus,Copy !req
101. I realize I am
unfamiliar with their offerings.Copy !req
102. Ok, fine.Copy !req
103. But what does that
have to do...Copy !req
104. Is it popular
among your peers?Copy !req
105. Is it enjoyed?Copy !req
106. - People seem to like it.
- Yeah, it's ok.Copy !req
107. And their selection
consists solely
of these burgers,Copy !req
108. Of which they are
presumably king?Copy !req
109. They have other things.
Chicken, fish.Copy !req
110. I'm sorry.
What are we doing here?Copy !req
111. Here is what we will do.Copy !req
112. Monica,
have one of the assistants go to
the nearest burger king locationCopy !req
113. And purchase one of everything.Copy !req
114. hey, dinesh. Dinesh.Copy !req
115. I'm on the phone with the bank
and they say they need an extra
form for your payroll,Copy !req
116. Because of your visa?Copy !req
117. Visa? What visa?Copy !req
118. I'm a fucking us citizen.Copy !req
119. I have dinesh chugtai here,
and he's pretty irate because...Copy !req
120. Oh, I see.Copy !req
121. Bertram gilfoyle is
the foreign national.Copy !req
122. Citizen of canada.Copy !req
123. Ok, thank you.Copy !req
124. You're canadian?Copy !req
125. Your "borders"
are merely a construct.Copy !req
126. I prefer to think of myself
as a citizen of the world.Copy !req
127. Do you mind just sending them
the form so they know
you're here legally?Copy !req
128. Yes, I mind.Copy !req
129. And also I may not be.Copy !req
130. To wit, maybe you could make
out my checks to cash?Copy !req
131. Or bitcoin.Copy !req
132. I didn't know
I was working with an illegal.Copy !req
133. The irony.Copy !req
134. Well, sometimes we do
center pivot,Copy !req
135. But mainly we do lineal
like you see out there.Copy !req
136. What is it your business
does again?Copy !req
137. Something to do with algebra?Copy !req
138. Uh... Algorithm, actually.Copy !req
139. It's for compression.Copy !req
140. Ultimately what we're
trying to do is...Copy !req
141. you remind me of my son.Copy !req
142. He's got asperger's too.Copy !req
143. Oh, no, I don't uh...Copy !req
144. Probably all those pesticides
they put on the crops.Copy !req
145. Well, whatever it is your
business does,Copy !req
146. I don't think it's
going to interfere with my
irrigation company here.Copy !req
147. I'm thinking about getting in
another line of work anyway.Copy !req
148. All these foreigners
coming over here,Copy !req
149. Putting pieces of shit
like that all over
the good farmland around here.Copy !req
150. All so people can sit around,
stare at their phones all day.Copy !req
151. Nobody jerks off
to magazines any more.Copy !req
152. Uh, well, actually,
that is a server farm.Copy !req
153. What we do, compression,Copy !req
154. Would mean fewer of those,
because we'd save
a lot of memory space.Copy !req
155. - Really?
- Yeah.Copy !req
156. Well, I'm all for that,
believe me.Copy !req
157. I'll tell you what.Copy !req
158. You can have the
name for a thousand dollars.Copy !req
159. How's that sound?Copy !req
160. Uh, that sounds great!Copy !req
161. Yeah, cool.Copy !req
162. Oh, tremors, too, huh?Copy !req
163. Just like my boy.Copy !req
164. Go for erlich.Copy !req
165. This is richard hendricks,
ceo of pied piper.Copy !req
166. That's right. You guys said
I was a bad negotiator,
but I closed it!Copy !req
167. We got a name.
Tell everyone you know.Copy !req
168. Oh, all right.Copy !req
169. You don't sound that impressed.Copy !req
170. no, no, I am.Copy !req
171. I just...Copy !req
172. Now we're pied piper.
So, later.Copy !req
173. Here you go.Copy !req
174. You must drink
a lot of margaritas huh?Copy !req
175. We will now.Copy !req
176. I have a startup
that just got fundedCopy !req
177. So this is just kind of a
gift for my guys to celebrate.Copy !req
178. Hup...Copy !req
179. Good luck with that.Copy !req
180. You'll need, too, it when this
town kicks you in the balls.Copy !req
181. - Ok. Sure.
- Let me get the door for you.Copy !req
182. I had three startups, myself,Copy !req
183. And I couldn't get those
sand hill road morons
to fund any of them.Copy !req
184. Cowards.
My last company was genius.Copy !req
185. Have you ever been
lost in a parking lot before?Copy !req
186. Uh...Copy !req
187. What app would do is use
existing avl technology, right?Copy !req
188. So you'd type in the vin
number. And if you car didn't
have avl capabilitiesCopy !req
189. You would just type in
whatever section of the
parking lot you were in,Copy !req
190. Like p3, or ground seven.Copy !req
191. So you just, you just write
down what section of the parking
lot you're in?Copy !req
192. Why do you need an app for that?Copy !req
193. So you can remember
where you parked.Copy !req
194. Right, uh, but why don't you
just write it down on paper?Copy !req
195. Well, yeah.
But this is for your phone.Copy !req
196. Ok, so it's just
sorta like notepad?Copy !req
197. - Exactly! See? You get it.
- Yeah. I get it.Copy !req
198. Why can't all those fucking vcs?Copy !req
199. - pussies, man.Copy !req
200. Oh, there we go, thanks.Copy !req
201. This is which one?Copy !req
202. The bk double stacker.Copy !req
203. Fascinating...Copy !req
204. Peter, I know that you areCopy !req
205. Incredibly
busy with... This.Copy !req
206. But I made a personal promise
to the astraphile guys that none
of their employees would loseCopy !req
207. Their job, which will happen
at midnight to...Copy !req
208. Do you see this?Copy !req
209. The junior whopper?Copy !req
210. No, not the sandwich.Copy !req
211. This seed...
Atop the breading.Copy !req
212. Those are sesame seeds.Copy !req
213. A high number of these breadings
have sesame seeds on them.Copy !req
214. Billions of breadings.Copy !req
215. Sesame seeds.Copy !req
216. They only grow
in certain microclimates.Copy !req
217. Peter, I know
you don't want to causeCopy !req
218. 173 people in north carolina...Copy !req
219. Cicadas.Copy !req
220. - Gentlemen!
- Hey!Copy !req
221. It's our own personal
herb cohen!Copy !req
222. - Who?
- Herb cohen.Copy !req
223. He's a famous negotiator.
Wrote a bunch of textbooks.Copy !req
224. - No?
- What?Copy !req
225. Have you seen the blogs?Copy !req
226. no.Copy !req
227. Erlich went ham
on all the tech sites.Copy !req
228. He hit techcrunch, recode,
and pandodaily.Copy !req
229. Listen to what
kara swisher says:Copy !req
230. "'individually", says erlich
bachman, "we are formidable.Copy !req
231. But when you combine
our portfolios,Copy !req
232. Peter gregory and I account for
billions of dollars in assets.Copy !req
233. We at pied piper look forward
to giving gavin belsonCopy !req
234. And the donkeys at nucleus
a run for their money.'"Copy !req
235. what a dick.Copy !req
236. It's the guy with the name.Copy !req
237. Hello, arnold.Copy !req
238. Cut the shit.Copy !req
239. I just recode.Net.Copy !req
240. You read recode?Copy !req
241. I do when my customers tell meCopy !req
242. The name of my company's
all over the internet.Copy !req
243. But you'd probably think I'm
just out here shitting in a hole
and wiping with my hand.Copy !req
244. No, no, no, I don't
think you do that.Copy !req
245. Do people think you do that?
Do you do that?Copy !req
246. no, no, no!Copy !req
247. I'm not falling for that
phony, mumbley-mouth,Copy !req
248. Googly-eyed routine again.Copy !req
249. If you're this
tech billionaire,Copy !req
250. Why did I give you the name
pied piper for next to nothing?Copy !req
251. You played me.Copy !req
252. You want the name, it's
going to cost you 250 grand.Copy !req
253. Ok, I think you just need
to talk to the guy
who said all that.Copy !req
254. And he can clear it up for you.Copy !req
255. - Where's erlich?
- He's outside with the intern.Copy !req
256. What intern?
You got interns?Copy !req
257. We might as well have interns,
we hire illegal aliens.Copy !req
258. - What?
- No, no. We don't have
either of those things.Copy !req
259. I'll tell you what, asshole,Copy !req
260. You use the name pied piper
again, I'm going to
call my lawyerCopy !req
261. And we're gonna sue
the shit out of you.Copy !req
262. - Fucking billionaires.
- Arnold? Arnold, hello?Copy !req
263. - That sounded sub-optimal.
- Yeah, it was.Copy !req
264. Hey, jared, you know who else
is canadian? Justin bieber,
the hitler of music.Copy !req
265. Do you have a problem
with me being canadian?Copy !req
266. I do, actually.Copy !req
267. Do you have any idea how long
it took me to become a citizen?Copy !req
268. Did it take you a long time?Copy !req
269. I'm glad I didn't do it then.Copy !req
270. Typical lazy immigrant.Copy !req
271. These people think they can just
walk into this country...Copy !req
272. I did just
walk into this country.Copy !req
273. My car broke
down on the ambassador bridge.Copy !req
274. It took me an extra
15 minutes to get across
the border. Major hassle.Copy !req
275. You know, hitler
actually played the bassoon.Copy !req
276. So, technically, hitler
was the hitler of music.Copy !req
277. I don't understand.
I thought you closed the name.Copy !req
278. Well, I guess it's still
a little ajar, I don't know.Copy !req
279. Who am I, herb cohen?Copy !req
280. - I don't know who that is.
- Neither do I.Copy !req
281. That's a...
That's a jared thing.Copy !req
282. Hey! Make sure to clean off
all the gunk off
the front bumper, ok.Copy !req
283. And since when do
we have an intern program?Copy !req
284. We don't.
And when keith finds that out,Copy !req
285. It's gonna be a valuable
business lesson for him.Copy !req
286. What? Those are
the pied piper shirts!Copy !req
287. - Are you richard?
- Yeah. Yes.Copy !req
288. Ok, look, I fucked up.
What do we do now?Copy !req
289. Who's "we"?Copy !req
290. This morning
you rudely reminded meCopy !req
291. That I wasn't a founder
of this company and nowCopy !req
292. You want me to hold your hand
and help you out?Copy !req
293. I don't think so, sister.Copy !req
294. This credit card is no good.Copy !req
295. Declined.Copy !req
296. great. Great.Copy !req
297. That stupid margarita machine
maxed me out.Copy !req
298. So now the ceo of pied piper
can't even afford to buy lunch.Copy !req
299. Yeah, I don't think
we can use that name anymore.Copy !req
300. Dude! Dude, hey.
I owe you a big apology, man.Copy !req
301. I had no idea who you were
before and I read
all this coverageCopy !req
302. About your company online,
and I was like,
"hey, pied piper!Copy !req
303. I met this dude!
He came into the storeCopy !req
304. And told me my parking app
was fucking awesome!"Copy !req
305. I did?Copy !req
306. Yeah, so my mom was like,
"wow, really?Copy !req
307. You should really pursue it!"Copy !req
308. And I was like,
"yeah, I should."Copy !req
309. The parking app?Copy !req
310. So she decides to get a reverse
mortgage on her homeCopy !req
311. And write me a check.Copy !req
312. - Ooh...
- So I'm funded!Copy !req
313. Because of you, man.Copy !req
314. I was this close to giving up,
and now you gave me
my dream back, man!Copy !req
315. - But...
- Oh, hey, ron!Copy !req
316. You see this guy?
This billionaire here?Copy !req
317. He's the reason why
I'm quitting!Copy !req
318. - Jamie, you don't...
- Well, you've helped me
so much,Copy !req
319. What can I do for you?Copy !req
320. well, I need
to return this machineCopy !req
321. Because I'm broke,
and I need money for food.Copy !req
322. Just a quick question.Copy !req
323. Uh, is this gonna be
a cash return, or does it
credit back to the card?Copy !req
324. All right, what about smaller,
spelled "s-m-l-l-r"?Copy !req
325. You know,
because we make things smaller,Copy !req
326. And this would be like
a smaller version
of the word "smaller".Copy !req
327. - It looks like "smeller".
- Ok.Copy !req
328. What if we spell it...Copy !req
329. "s-m-l-r"?Copy !req
330. Because that's an even smaller
version of the word smaller.Copy !req
331. Then it looks like "smiler".Copy !req
332. We're not gonna
kick the shitCopy !req
333. Out of "nucleus"
with "smiler."Copy !req
334. Where's richard? Why isn't
he in here for this?Copy !req
335. I think he was out back,
wishing he'd taken
the ten million dollars.Copy !req
336. No, I just saw him in his room,
wishing he had taken
the ten million dollars.Copy !req
337. You know "smiler"
is also something that guys
call women's assholes.Copy !req
338. Richard, why aren't
you in there,
coming up with new names?Copy !req
339. I don't want a new name.
I want pied piper.Copy !req
340. But, apparently,
I can't have that.Copy !req
341. So now I have to come up
with a new nameCopy !req
342. And take that to peter gregory
and ask for a new checkCopy !req
343. He's gonna know pull
our funding, gavin belson's
going to crush us,Copy !req
344. And we will be ruined
because I have no idea
what I'm doing.Copy !req
345. Neither did zuckerberg
when he was running
facebook at 19.Copy !req
346. You think he had any real-world
business experience? No. None.Copy !req
347. But he was such a tough
negotiator that now all
of his friends are suing him.Copy !req
348. How awesome is that?
And steve jobs?Copy !req
349. He took a shit-ton
of hallucinogens.Copy !req
350. What a coincidence.Copy !req
351. Maybe something
that you could actually do.Copy !req
352. I'm not going
on some fucking vision quest.Copy !req
353. Ok, let me get this straight,
you would rather do
nothing than something?Copy !req
354. Because all the guys
in the other roomCopy !req
355. Coming up with shitty names
like, "smallulator," are
at least doing something.Copy !req
356. Fine. I'll just do it myself.Copy !req
357. I'll be back
in 24 to 72 hours.Copy !req
358. Have a cold pitcher of water
and some orange slices
ready for me.Copy !req
359. You know what, I'm really
gonna go for this motherfuckerCopy !req
360. So you better have some
grapefruit ready, too.Copy !req
361. I'm gonna come back with a name
so amazing that peter gregory
will write us ten checks.Copy !req
362. What about, "dwarfism 2.0"?Copy !req
363. Where's "dwarfism 1.0"?Copy !req
364. Just in the world.Copy !req
365. - Oh.
- That's prejudice.Copy !req
366. - That's hurtful.
- I'm sorry.Copy !req
367. Small, come back now,
are you here?Copy !req
368. interesting.Copy !req
369. Hey! That is not cherry garcia.Copy !req
370. Sorry, gilfoyle.
Company business.Copy !req
371. And who's hiding drugs? Shocker,
it's the illegal immigrant.Copy !req
372. what about mine-imize,
like "minimize" but "mine".Copy !req
373. Hello, mr. Garris.Copy !req
374. Yes, this is richard
from the companyCopy !req
375. That is rightly called
pied piper.Copy !req
376. That's right.Copy !req
377. No, no, no. You listen to me.
Ok. We had a handshake deal.Copy !req
378. And that may not mean
a lot to you, but where I'm
from, that means a whole lot.Copy !req
379. Ok, you agreed to sell me that
name for a thousand dollars.Copy !req
380. So let me ask you this?
Are you an honest man
or are you a goddamn liar?Copy !req
381. Ok. Yes, same address?Copy !req
382. Good, yeah, great.
See you then.Copy !req
383. Dude, that was fucking badass.
What did he say?Copy !req
384. He said he was gonna
get in his truck,Copy !req
385. Drive down here and
beat the living shit out of me.Copy !req
386. Why did you say
that was your address?Copy !req
387. - Say any other address.
- I don't know.Copy !req
388. He's got a very powerful voice.Copy !req
389. What are we gonna do?Copy !req
390. If you keep screaming your name,Copy !req
391. It forces the assailant to
acknowledge you as a human.Copy !req
392. It is now 5:35pm and I have
ingested the psilocybin.Copy !req
393. I have started
the countdown timerCopy !req
394. And I will be reaching
sonora and nirvana
in approximately...Copy !req
395. - Oh, fuck.Copy !req
396. Oh, shit.Copy !req
397. he's here, that's him.Copy !req
398. He came.Copy !req
399. - Should I call 911?
- No, that's a pussy move.Copy !req
400. - Yeah, it's a pussy move.
- Shhh.Copy !req
401. - Just shush.Copy !req
402. Just stay here until
he goes away, please.Copy !req
403. I'm looking for pied piper.Copy !req
404. You know where it is?Copy !req
405. This is pied piper.Copy !req
406. No, no, no.
It's a company.Copy !req
407. Like a big, big office.Copy !req
408. Do you know where that is?Copy !req
409. Yeah, this it. Here.
Pied piper.Copy !req
410. No...Copy !req
411. Uh...Copy !req
412. Hi, arnold.Copy !req
413. I'm richard. I'm richard.
I'm richard.Copy !req
414. - Donald. I'm donald.
- Richard. Richard...Copy !req
415. - Jared. I'm jared.
- Richard, richard, richard.Copy !req
416. - Gilfoyle. Gilfoyle.
- My name is richard.Copy !req
417. - Jared, jared.
- Richard, richard.Copy !req
418. - gilfoyle, gilfoyle.
- Jing yang. Jing yang.
Jing yang.Copy !req
419. Sysbit digital solutions.Copy !req
420. Integrating open data spaces.Copy !req
421. Yeah.Copy !req
422. Techbitdata solution systems.Copy !req
423. Creating unique cross
platform technologies.Copy !req
424. Technologies.
Technolo-Jesus.Copy !req
425. Oh, fuck!Copy !req
426. so this is pied piper?Copy !req
427. This is
a billion dollar company?Copy !req
428. Not even close.
Not yet.Copy !req
429. You pack a lot of guys
in here.Copy !req
430. It reminds me when I started
pied piper in my garage.Copy !req
431. I kind of miss those days.Copy !req
432. Oh, yeah?Copy !req
433. I'll tell you what.Copy !req
434. Five thousand bucks
and the name is yours.Copy !req
435. Well, the thing is
we agreed on a thousand.Copy !req
436. Fine, four grand.Copy !req
437. look,
that's not the deal.Copy !req
438. - We shook on it.
- Two thousand. Final offer.Copy !req
439. We could do two.
That's reasonable.Copy !req
440. No, we can't do two, jared.
It's not reasonable at all.Copy !req
441. Look, we shook hands
on a thousand dollars.
That's the deal.Copy !req
442. Ok. A grand.Copy !req
443. But you gotta
throw in some gas money.Copy !req
444. - I drove all the way out here.
- To come to kick my ass!Copy !req
445. Ok, you know what?Copy !req
446. Five hundred!
That's the deal. Five hundred.Copy !req
447. - Fuck this.
- No, no, no, no.Copy !req
448. We don't have to...
We can keep it at the original
thousand dollars.Copy !req
449. So, let's...Copy !req
450. - Ok, you got a deal.
- All right. Cool.Copy !req
451. We got a name!Copy !req
452. Infotrode...Copy !req
453. Cloud-based,
disruptive platforms.Copy !req
454. Disrupting the cloud
through...Copy !req
455. I said cloud twice, shit.Copy !req
456. Making the world a better placeCopy !req
457. Through cross-platform business
facing cloud...Copy !req
458. There's that... Shit!
There's that cloud again!Copy !req
459. Info-trode, info-trode!
What the fuck is info-trode?Copy !req
460. What is that? It's all just
fucking meaningless words!Copy !req
461. Ok. No, no, no...Copy !req
462. Making the world a better place.
Making the world a better place.Copy !req
463. Making the world a better place.
Making the world a better place.Copy !req
464. Making the world a better place.
Making the world a better place.Copy !req
465. good-bye.Copy !req
466. Making the world a better place.
Making the world a better place.Copy !req
467. Making the world a better place.
Making the world a better place.Copy !req
468. - Making the world
a better place.
- Sir?Copy !req
469. Are you ok in there?Copy !req
470. - Making the world
a better place.
- He's been in there all night.Copy !req
471. I should call the sheriff.Copy !req
472. Making the world
a better place...Copy !req
473. No, I... Hey, I told you
he's going to handle it!Copy !req
474. - Mr. Gregory,
this is ridiculous.
- Sir...Copy !req
475. Mr. Gregory, we need an answer
and we need it now!Copy !req
476. - Yes?
- We need money. Now.Copy !req
477. And I'm sure that burger king
and sesame seedsCopy !req
478. And whatever else you've been
mumbling about in hereCopy !req
479. All seem lovely
to think about...Copy !req
480. Myanmar and brazil.Copy !req
481. No, no! No more of this!Copy !req
482. Ok, are we getting
the money or not?Copy !req
483. Will you please tell us
what the hell is going on?Copy !req
484. Amusing coincidence
that two of the three countriesCopy !req
485. That provide the world's
sesame seeds have such
large cicada population, no?Copy !req
486. The cicadas of myanmar emerge
every 13 years,Copy !req
487. While the brazilian cicadas
emerge every 17.Copy !req
488. Next year they will hatch,
simultaneously,Copy !req
489. For the first
time in 221 years.Copy !req
490. Crops from both countries
will be decimated.Copy !req
491. Unlike myanmar
and brazil, indonesia
has no cicada population.Copy !req
492. I was surprised to see
indonesian sesame seed
futures priced so low.Copy !req
493. I made a purchase.Copy !req
494. And now, if the shortage
spikes the global priceCopy !req
495. Even ten percent
we'll profit...Copy !req
496. - Evan?
- Sixty-eight million dollars.Copy !req
497. If you wish, I could tap that
projected revenue and make youCopy !req
498. A bridge loan of 15 million
dollars, gentlemen.Copy !req
499. - unless you need more?Copy !req
500. No, that's... Thank you.
Thank you, holy shit.Copy !req
501. Yes? Happy?Copy !req
502. See? I told you
he was taking care of it.Copy !req
503. And now,
would anyone like some bk?Copy !req
504. evan was kind enough
to go out and get breakfast.Copy !req
505. It's just sitting here.Copy !req
506. - Actually, we'd...
I'd love some.
- Thank you so much.Copy !req
507. Is there cumin
in this barbecue sauce?Copy !req
508. - I will definitely find out.
- Please do.Copy !req
509. Gentlemen, we just
got back from the bank.Copy !req
510. Our first deposit slip.Copy !req
511. We are officially pied piper.Copy !req
512. And I am officially legal.Copy !req
513. Dinesh wouldn't
shut the hell up,Copy !req
514. So we finally
went to the visa office.Copy !req
515. Took me five minutes.Copy !req
516. Took me five years.
They asked me about al-qaeda,
like, 14 times.Copy !req
517. He literally got it while
I was still looking for parking.Copy !req
518. - Hello.
- is this pied piper?Copy !req
519. It is now, but we're not
taking an follow-on investors
at this point.Copy !req
520. Investors? No, this is
kelsey from the arco station
out on 108.Copy !req
521. Someone smeared your name
and number in shit
on my bathroom wall.Copy !req
522. - Uh, I think you may have
the wrong number...
- Richie.Copy !req
523. Oh, hey, guys.Copy !req
524. Uh, hi. Who is this?Copy !req
525. You're not gonna believe this,
but this is me.Copy !req
526. Time is a sphere and I've been
reincarnated during the same
time period in which I exist.Copy !req
527. Yes, but where he come from?Copy !req
528. From the future, obviously.Copy !req
529. Also, from a parking lot
at a gas station in sonora.Copy !req
530. He ate the whole bag
of gold caps.Copy !req
531. Awesome!Copy !req
532. Erlich...Copy !req
533. So, should I call the cops now
before anyone else does?Copy !req
534. I just got an amber alert
for rogilio nuñez.Copy !req
535. Yeah, ok.Copy !req