1. Oh, hey.
Look, I can't tell youCopy !req
2. what happened last week
on Shameless.Copy !req
3. I'm dealing with a bit
of a plumbing issue.Copy !req
4. - Fuck!Copy !req
5. Debbie!
Hey, get up here, all right?Copy !req
6. Franny tried to flush
a Care BearCopy !req
7. down the toilet again.Copy !req
8. Dementia?Copy !req
9. Motherfucker!Copy !req
10. How did I get here?
Fiona? Lip?Copy !req
11. Terry's coming home today.Copy !req
12. They sending him home
with a nurseCopy !req
13. - or something at least?
- I don't think so.Copy !req
14. Can I help?Copy !req
15. My mom's moving to Louisville.Copy !req
16. She says there's no community
here for her anymore.Copy !req
17. I just wanna crawl into bed
and cry myself to sleep.Copy !req
18. Look, we sell
the stuff from Born Free,Copy !req
19. - that'll carry us for a while.
- Can't use my garage.Copy !req
20. Yeah, we couldn't
use that anyway.Copy !req
21. You know, it's the first place
cops would look.Copy !req
22. - The cops?
- Yeah, they might comeCopy !req
23. pokin' around.Copy !req
24. Hey, did you hear
Born FreeCopy !req
25. - got broken into last—
Brad and I broke in.Copy !req
26. I just—I needed to do
something.Copy !req
27. And if you get caught
and go to jail,Copy !req
28. what is that gonna fix?Copy !req
29. So why didn't you
tell me you abandoned a kid?Copy !req
30. You ran out on people
who needed youCopy !req
31. because you wanted to
go do your own shit.Copy !req
32. You are piling all your
abandonment issues on me.Copy !req
33. Monica ran out on you,Copy !req
34. and now the rest of them
wanna run out on you too.Copy !req
35. Fuck!Copy !req
36. What the fuck
are you doing?Copy !req
37. - We're selling!
- No!Copy !req
38. Does
Philip Gallagher live here?Copy !req
39. He's inside.
Just be careful.Copy !req
40. He's got a sledgehammer.Copy !req
41. Psst!Copy !req
42. Psst!Copy !req
43. Hey!Copy !req
44. Psst! Psst!Copy !req
45. You wanna watch me jerk off?Copy !req
46. Thanks, but fuck no.Copy !req
47. Hey, you got any updates
on what's goin' on?Copy !req
48. When the detectives
are ready for you,Copy !req
49. - they'll let ya know.
- All right, could I getCopy !req
50. - a sandwich or somethin'?
- Legally don't gotta provideCopy !req
51. any food, 'cause legally
you're not under arrest.Copy !req
52. All right, so legally,
I can just go.Copy !req
53. Sure, but you try to leave,
they probably will arrest youCopy !req
54. and bring you right back in.Copy !req
55. Psst!Copy !req
56. - Is Lip okay?
Ah, he'll be all right.Copy !req
57. It's not his first time
getting questioned.Copy !req
58. He can handle an interrogation.Copy !req
59. You can't just use your cop
"get outta jail free" card?Copy !req
60. When I get in,
I'm gonna try toCopy !req
61. grease the wheels
of justice.Copy !req
62. Do we have
any triple-A batteries?Copy !req
63. That's a big hole.Copy !req
64. Coulda just said
he wanted to renovate.Copy !req
65. Your brother's
a fuckin' drama queen, man.Copy !req
66. Hey, scarf that shit down.
I wanna go check on Terry.Copy !req
67. We have a lotta pick-ups today.
I don't know if we have time.Copy !req
68. We would if you stopped yappin'
and started eatin'.Copy !req
69. You guys remember I have
a thing after school, right?Copy !req
70. Yeah, of course.Copy !req
71. Wouldn't miss it, buddy.Copy !req
72. What thing?
Don't ya want your dad there,Copy !req
73. - cheerin' you on?
- Mm... not really.Copy !req
74. Well, what is it, anyway?Copy !req
75. A contest to pick a new name
for my school.Copy !req
76. The winner
gets a free iPad.Copy !req
77. Why does your school
need a new name?Copy !req
78. 'Cause it's named
after Dennis Hastert.Copy !req
79. Fuck is Dennis Hastert?Copy !req
80. Former speaker of
the House of Representative.Copy !req
81. - Native Chicagoan.
- And a child molester.Copy !req
82. He's canceled.Copy !req
83. Canceled?
You can't cancel history.Copy !req
84. It's already happened.Copy !req
85. Political correctness
is gonna kill this country.Copy !req
86. He diddled kids.Copy !req
87. Uh, beside the point.Copy !req
88. We can't be applying
today's sexual standardsCopy !req
89. to... molesters of yesteryear.Copy !req
90. Molesting used to be okay?Copy !req
91. Dennis Hastert
brought a lotta federal dollarsCopy !req
92. to Illinois.Copy !req
93. I don't think
I can just stand byCopy !req
94. while the PC police
erase his legacy.Copy !req
95. This is the hill
you wanna die on, Frank?Copy !req
96. - Defending a pedo?
Defending tradition,Copy !req
97. defending our shared history?
Yeah.Copy !req
98. I'll die on this hill.Copy !req
99. This is a hill
we all should die on together.Copy !req
100. Come on.
Hey, let's go.Copy !req
101. I wanna make sure they're
takin' care of fuckin' TerryCopy !req
102. over there.Copy !req
103. That one has an Uber
coming for him in ten,Copy !req
104. and that one isn't my problem.Copy !req
105. Where's Debbie?
- Since when am I in chargeCopy !req
106. of keeping track of Debbie?Copy !req
107. Aren't you in, like,
a committedCopy !req
108. lesbian scissoring thing?Copy !req
109. You mean a relationship?Copy !req
110. I don't know.
We never defined it.Copy !req
111. But, uh, since she didn't come
home last night, I guess not.Copy !req
112. What are supposed to do
with Franny?Copy !req
113. - We gotta get to work.
- She's not my fucking problem.Copy !req
114. None of this shit is,
your sister included.Copy !req
115. Okay, come on, Franny.Copy !req
116. I will drop you off at school
on my way to work.Copy !req
117. Okay, hey, uh, let me knowCopy !req
118. when you find out about Lip,
all right?Copy !req
119. Yeah.Copy !req
120. Uh, what's that guy doing?Copy !req
121. This goddamn thing
doesn't work!Copy !req
122. - Shit!Copy !req
123. Mm—
All right, my love,Copy !req
124. I let ya sleep in.
I even turned a blind eyeCopy !req
125. when you moved from the bed
to the couchCopy !req
126. and slept some more.Copy !req
127. But now it's time
to carpet denim.Copy !req
128. What?
- Carpet denim.Copy !req
129. It's Latin for wake up!Copy !req
130. Oh, I just wanna sleep.
Please.Copy !req
131. You wanna talk about it?Copy !req
132. My mama's moving.
She's abandoning us.Copy !req
133. - What's there to talk about?
- Oh, we can go visitCopy !req
134. for holidays and stuff.Copy !req
135. Who doesn't wanna spend
Christmas in Kentucky?Copy !req
136. V, if you don't get up,Copy !req
137. we're gonna be late
opening the Alibi.Copy !req
138. - Who cares?
- What about the girls?Copy !req
139. We gotta get them ready—
you don't want meCopy !req
140. - doing their hair, do you?
- Who cares?Copy !req
141. V, you're the one
who always saysCopy !req
142. that a white woman
can take her daughter to schoolCopy !req
143. lookin' any old way,
but if a Black woman does it,Copy !req
144. people start to question
whether she's a fit mother—Copy !req
145. Go away!Copy !req
146. Is there anything I can do
to get you up?Copy !req
147. - Okay, fine.
- Oh.Copy !req
148. I'm up.
- Okay, great!Copy !req
149. I'm goin' back
upstairs and gettin' into bed.Copy !req
150. You keep botherin' me,
I'ma stab your ass.Copy !req
151. Watch.Copy !req
152. How'd you sleep?Copy !req
153. Not great.Copy !req
154. Seriously, who the fuck
do they think they are?Copy !req
155. I'm sorry, I don't know
who we're talking about.Copy !req
156. My family.
Sandy, her...Copy !req
157. fucking husband,
and her secret child.Copy !req
158. Thanks for letting me crash,
by the way.Copy !req
159. Feel bad
I put you outta your bed.Copy !req
160. - Couch is pretty comfortable.
- I mean, we could have shared.Copy !req
161. Under normal circumstances,
I would have loved that.Copy !req
162. But I can tell
you're pretty emotional,Copy !req
163. and I didn't wanna
take advantage.Copy !req
164. You got plans today?Copy !req
165. Work.Copy !req
166. - Too bad.
But...Copy !req
167. I'm the boss.
You wanna come?Copy !req
168. See, I was at home
with my lady and my kid.Copy !req
169. All right?
She'll vouch for me.Copy !req
170. The kid, he can't talk yet,
but if he could,Copy !req
171. he'd say Daddy was home
all night.Copy !req
172. We have
your juvenile arrest records,Copy !req
173. okay?Copy !req
174. So you can drop
the choir boy act.Copy !req
175. No, you see, tha-that's
the old me, all right?Copy !req
176. I'm reformed now.
I'm sober, even.Copy !req
177. You know, I'm not sayin'
I'm a saint but, uh,Copy !req
178. I'm a family man,
makin' an honest living.Copy !req
179. Okay, asshole,Copy !req
180. we know that you were involved
with the robbery,Copy !req
181. so you can either cooperate,
or we can make you cooperate.Copy !req
182. All right, first of all,
if you knew I was involvedCopy !req
183. in the robbery,
I'd be in cuffs right now,Copy !req
184. and second of all,
I am cooperating.Copy !req
185. What am I doing
if I'm not cooperating?Copy !req
186. Look, make it easy on yourself.Copy !req
187. Tell us where the bikes are,
who helped you,Copy !req
188. and maybe we can recommend
you avoid doin' real time.Copy !req
189. Hey, can I go?Copy !req
190. Oh, motherfucker, when's the
last time that got changed?Copy !req
191. Fuck do I know?
I can't see it.Copy !req
192. - You can smell it, though.
- We don't have time for this.Copy !req
193. We're behind schedule,
and we have to wrap up earlyCopy !req
194. for Liam's thing.
Mickey—Copy !req
195. What the fuck are you—
Hey, get—Copy !req
196. Come on, man.Copy !req
197. Aah.
What the hell, Mick?Copy !req
198. Terry duty, asshole.
Get up!Copy !req
199. Naw, no way, man.
I took care of him on Tuesday.Copy !req
200. - It's not my turn—
- Empty his shit bag,Copy !req
201. or I empty your skull—
your choice.Copy !req
202. Uh, hey, could you
look up somethingCopy !req
203. related to a recent arrest
for me?Copy !req
204. Sure.
What's the name of the perp?Copy !req
205. Um... Philip Gallagher.Copy !req
206. Rookie,
are you really asking meCopy !req
207. to break every protocol
in the book so you canCopy !req
208. potentially interfere
with an ongoing investigationCopy !req
209. involving one
of your family members?Copy !req
210. Uh...Copy !req
211. I'm fuckin' with you.Copy !req
212. I misuse this system
all the time.Copy !req
213. One of the perks of the job.Copy !req
214. G-A-L-L-ACopy !req
215. G-H-E-R.Copy !req
216. Hmm.
No arrest yet,Copy !req
217. but they are seeking
a warrant for his house.Copy !req
218. Just waitin' on
a judge's signature.Copy !req
219. Shit.Copy !req
220. Gallagher.
- Ah, ma'am.Copy !req
221. Do you know who my new
training officer's gonna be?Copy !req
222. Training officer?Copy !req
223. That's not gonna happen.Copy !req
224. No one wants to work with you
on account of the Carl Curse.Copy !req
225. Ma'am?Copy !req
226. The Carl Curse.Copy !req
227. Everyone who trained you
ends up injured.Copy !req
228. You ever heard of
a lucky rabbit's foot?Copy !req
229. Yeah.Copy !req
230. You're the opposite of that.Copy !req
231. Now, not all bad news.Copy !req
232. - I got you a new assignment.
- What is it?Copy !req
233. They just walked in.Copy !req
234. and meet us outside.Copy !req
235. You're with Vice now.Copy !req
236. Hell, yeah!Copy !req
237. God, how cool are they?Copy !req
238. - Damn it.Copy !req
239. Oh, shit.
Bad word!Copy !req
240. I'm sorry, girls—I just got
an email from the Man.Copy !req
241. What do you think—
taxes, jury duty?Copy !req
242. Unpaid parking tickets?Copy !req
243. - Maybe it's a pizza party.
Life lesson.Copy !req
244. Emails from the government
are never awesome.Copy !req
245. They always suck.Copy !req
246. Here goes.Copy !req
247. Is it a pizza party?Copy !req
248. Even better.Copy !req
249. A surprise for Mommy.Copy !req
250. Come on.Copy !req
251. Shit.Copy !req
252. Shit!Copy !req
253. Fuck.Copy !req
254. Tami, hey, it's Lip.Copy !req
255. We got a big fuckin' problem,
all right?Copy !req
256. Carl just told me that, um...Copy !req
257. Can you believe it?Copy !req
258. Uh... you know what?
Never mind.Copy !req
259. I'll just, uh...
I'll see ya at home.Copy !req
260. All right?
Bye.Copy !req
261. We're just goin' to my bar.Copy !req
262. You can wear
what you already have on.Copy !req
263. I wore this yesterday.Copy !req
264. If you don't like
anything I have...Copy !req
265. No! It's not that, I just—
I don't know.Copy !req
266. I wanna dress up a little.Copy !req
267. Always makes me feel better,Copy !req
268. which could definitely
help right now,Copy !req
269. considering my mood
borders on...Copy !req
270. homicidal rage.Copy !req
271. You wanna talk about it?Copy !req
272. What's to talk about?Copy !req
273. My life might be
a dumpster fire,Copy !req
274. but it doesn't mean
I can't look good.Copy !req
275. Hey, what's this?Copy !req
276. It's my ex, Haley's, old stuff.Copy !req
277. Can I borrow some of it?Copy !req
278. Sure.Copy !req
279. Sweet.Copy !req
280. These are yours?Copy !req
281. Sure does look like it.
Get in.Copy !req
282. Can I drive?Copy !req
283. No.Copy !req
284. Hey, can you at least
tell me what we're doin'?Copy !req
285. - Hey, you're up.
- Headed to my mom's.Copy !req
286. - Why?
- I'm gonna help her pack.Copy !req
287. Oh. You feelin' better
about her movin'?Copy !req
288. Uh, no. I'm gonna go steal
the keys to her U-Haul.Copy !req
289. Really?Copy !req
290. I should.Copy !req
291. But I decided to be
a supportive daughter instead.Copy !req
292. Gonna approach her leaving
with a positive attitude.Copy !req
293. Oh, positive.Copy !req
294. Yes, asshole.Copy !req
295. Positive, mature.
A ray of fucking sunshine.Copy !req
296. Why shouldn't I be?Copy !req
297. My mom's moving
halfway across the world.Copy !req
298. - Kentucky's not that far.
- Bye, Kev.Copy !req
299. Well, I was hoping we could
spend the afternoon together.Copy !req
300. I have the rest of my miserable
life to spend with you.Copy !req
301. - My mom leaves in two days.
- What time ya comin' back?Copy !req
302. When I feel like it!Copy !req
303. Askin' so many damn questions.Copy !req
304. But why now?Copy !req
305. He touched those boys
decades ago.Copy !req
306. Doesn't cancel culture have
a statute of limitations?Copy !req
307. Mr. Gallagher, Dennis Hastert
no longer reflects our values.Copy !req
308. The hell he doesn't!Copy !req
309. He was speaker of the House,Copy !req
310. third in line
for the presidency.Copy !req
311. He was a wrestling coach!Copy !req
312. How else are wrestling coaches
supposed to demonstrate holdsCopy !req
313. if they don't...
grope some boys?Copy !req
314. - Context matters.
- Please keep your voice down.Copy !req
315. Can I go to class?
- Yes.Copy !req
316. And...
w-why are youCopy !req
317. leaving it to the kids?
Kids are stupid.Copy !req
318. The school board
wanted the childrenCopy !req
319. to feel ownership and pride
in the new name.Copy !req
320. That's why the contest has been
limited to current studentsCopy !req
321. and alumni.Copy !req
322. Alumni?Copy !req
323. I'm an alumnus!Copy !req
324. You are?
Hell, yes!Copy !req
325. Back when it was still
J. Edgar Hoover.Copy !req
326. Go, Feds.Copy !req
327. No, fuck you! F—Copy !req
328. Tough talk on the other end
of a phone, bitch.Copy !req
329. No, no, no, no—Michigan,
fuckin' China.Copy !req
330. It doesn't matter
where you hide out.Copy !req
331. I am gonna hunt you down.Copy !req
332. I'm gonna empty Terry's
shit bag in your fuckin' mouth,Copy !req
333. you piece of shit!Copy !req
334. Cousin Joey?Copy !req
335. Dickhead just decided
to run off.Copy !req
336. Hidin' out with one of his
scumbag friends in Michigan,Copy !req
337. all so he can avoid
taking care of Terry.Copy !req
338. Fuckin' believe that?Copy !req
339. I mean, it is Terry.Copy !req
340. Obviously, we can't rely
on family for this.Copy !req
341. We're gonna have to hire
someone to do it.Copy !req
342. Like with money?Copy !req
343. Yeah, get one of those
house nurses or whatever.Copy !req
344. You wanna hire a nurse?Copy !req
345. I thought we were saving up
for our own place.Copy !req
346. Well, shit shifted.Copy !req
347. Shit shifted to Terry.Copy !req
348. I have to worry about you?
The whole loyalty department?Copy !req
349. What?Copy !req
350. Yeah, when I'm too old
to wipe my own ass,Copy !req
351. you're gonna be over there
counting fuckin' pennies,Copy !req
352. decidin' whether or not
you can take care of me?Copy !req
353. - That's different.
- Family's family.Copy !req
354. Fine.
We'll find a fucking nurse.Copy !req
355. [Ian, under breath]
Wipe your ass.Copy !req
356. Ah.
I'll go for another.Copy !req
357. Hey, it's five o'clock
somewhere.Copy !req
358. Ha.Copy !req
359. Anyone at home wondering
where you might be all day?Copy !req
360. Trust me,
they don't give a shit.Copy !req
361. Hey, guys.Copy !req
362. Uh, sit anywhere you like.
I'll be right with you.Copy !req
363. You boys celebrating something?Copy !req
364. Uh... we're taking an extendedCopy !req
365. and hopefully very boozy
lunch breakCopy !req
366. so we can commemorate the day
this ugly bastard was born.Copy !req
367. That's so nice.Copy !req
368. How 'bout some shots
on the house?Copy !req
369. On the house?
No.Copy !req
370. I can do Happy Hour price
in honor of the birthday boy.Copy !req
371. Will you two do a shot
with us?Copy !req
372. I'm on the clock.Copy !req
373. Red?Copy !req
374. Pour 'em up.Copy !req
375. Tam!Copy !req
376. Yo, we gotta clear out
the boxes!Copy !req
377. Police.
Open up!Copy !req
378. All right,
all right, all right!Copy !req
379. Philip Gallagher,
we have a warrantCopy !req
380. to search the premises.Copy !req
381. Yeah, well, come on in.Copy !req
382. You know,
if I was a lifetime criminalCopy !req
383. motorcycle mechanic
who just stoleCopy !req
384. a shitload of motorcycles,Copy !req
385. I might just be dumb enoughCopy !req
386. to keep them in
the most obvious place.Copy !req
387. Where's your garage?Copy !req
388. Well, shit,Copy !req
389. look, sorry, no stolen bikes,Copy !req
390. but, uh, you're welcome to takeCopy !req
391. one of those
Christmas tree stands.Copy !req
392. I don't know
how we ended up with two.Copy !req
393. - Keep these, right?
- Oh, no. Give away pile.Copy !req
394. What?
I love these.Copy !req
395. It's not Christmas
without these plates.Copy !req
396. Girl, they have been
in that box since 2007,Copy !req
397. which, coincidentally,
is the last timeCopy !req
398. that we had dinner
at my house.Copy !req
399. What am I gonna do with
a Santa table setting for 12Copy !req
400. - in Louisville, huh?
- You are literallyCopy !req
401. throwin' away everything.
What's the point?Copy !req
402. We should just back
a garbage truck in hereCopy !req
403. and shovel everything in it.Copy !req
404. - Yeah, that's not a bad idea.
- Ma...Copy !req
405. this is my entire childhood,
all of our memories.Copy !req
406. Throw away the damn plates, V!Copy !req
407. Thought helping you,
hangin' out might be fun,Copy !req
408. but this shit is awful.Copy !req
409. - I thought we would talk!
- Excuse me.Copy !req
410. Had you asked instead of just
inviting yourself over,Copy !req
411. I would've told you that I'm
too busy to hang out and talk.Copy !req
412. Oh, shit... I gotta get
over to my storage unit.Copy !req
413. - I'll go with.
- Uh, no, thanks.Copy !req
414. - Why not?
- Because I've had enoughCopy !req
415. of your company today.Copy !req
416. Look, I'm excited
about Louisville,Copy !req
417. and you killin' my vibe.Copy !req
418. I'm not dyin'.
I'm just movin'.Copy !req
419. So what?
Get over it.Copy !req
420. If it isn't
my favorite vice detectives.Copy !req
421. Man, you know I had to
bring you some dogsCopy !req
422. from downtown for later—
extra relish,Copy !req
423. - extra celery sauce.
- Aw... muah!Copy !req
424. You gentlemen are heroes.Copy !req
425. I can never make it all the way
downtown to get these.Copy !req
426. How're these fine machines
treatin' ya?Copy !req
427. Uh, she rides just
a little rough,Copy !req
428. but tell me what the story is
on that Viper over there.Copy !req
429. I need a few days
before I canCopy !req
430. - let ya take that one.
What's wrong with it?Copy !req
431. Belonged to
a parks commissionerCopy !req
432. accused
of embezzling city funds.Copy !req
433. Blew his brains out
in the front seat.Copy !req
434. Still a mess on the dashboard.Copy !req
435. Yo, wait.Copy !req
436. So you guys just come here
and take whatever you want?Copy !req
437. As long as it helps aidCopy !req
438. an ongoin' investigation.Copy !req
439. Or if we think it looks cool.
Ya got anything new?Copy !req
440. Glad you asked.
I been able toCopy !req
441. squirrel away a few things
for you gents.Copy !req
442. Act now,
before it's logged as evidence.Copy !req
443. Hey, barkeep!
Another.Copy !req
444. Let's make these your last.Copy !req
445. What? The day's young!Copy !req
446. I have some coke,Copy !req
447. if you're interested.Copy !req
448. All clear.Copy !req
449. Hey. Hey, buddy.
- Hey.Copy !req
450. Uh, what's goin' on?Copy !req
451. They think
I robbed Born Free.Copy !req
452. What? Ha.
Wait—you?Copy !req
453. No.Copy !req
454. Yeah.
Checked the whole house.Copy !req
455. But came up empty-handed,
'cause...Copy !req
456. I didn't do it.Copy !req
457. Go ahead.Copy !req
458. Hey, and, uh, good luck,
you know,Copy !req
459. finding the real criminals,
guys.Copy !req
460. Lip, we need to talk, okay?Copy !req
461. - You cannot just—
- Shh, shh, shh.Copy !req
462. You moved all the boxes
outta the garage?Copy !req
463. Well, they didn't move
themselves.Copy !req
464. Where'd you put 'em?Copy !req
465. Uh,
in my dad's basement.Copy !req
466. Hey.Copy !req
467. Lip.Copy !req
468. Y-you can't put our family
in danger like this.Copy !req
469. You have Fred to think about.
You have me to think about.Copy !req
470. We can't have the cops just
showing up at our house and...Copy !req
471. hello!Copy !req
472. Are you even listening
to a word that I'm saying?Copy !req
473. Kay, why are you staring
at me like that?Copy !req
474. Sorry, sorry.
It's just, um...Copy !req
475. uh, I-I guess
this whole Gallagher thingCopy !req
476. is finally rubbin' off on ya.Copy !req
477. I didn't know
you had it in you.Copy !req
478. Well...Copy !req
479. yeah, I...Copy !req
480. I didn't know I had it
in me either.Copy !req
481. You know, Carl called,Copy !req
482. told me about the warrant,
and I just...Copy !req
483. I just acted.Copy !req
484. It was like
something clicked in my brain,Copy !req
485. and I just went on autopilot.Copy !req
486. Does this make me
an accomplice?Copy !req
487. Accessory after the fact.Copy !req
488. Oh.Copy !req
489. It's kinda hot.Copy !req
490. Yeah, it is.Copy !req
491. I thought being
a criminal would be exciting,Copy !req
492. but I didn't know
that it would be...Copy !req
493. sexually exciting.Copy !req
494. - What about Fred?
He's out like a light.Copy !req
495. We'll be quiet.Copy !req
496. You? I doubt it.Copy !req
497. I'll just bite your shoulder
when I get the urge to scream.Copy !req
498. I don't need a fuckin' nurse.Copy !req
499. You can't walk, Terry.Copy !req
500. You can't feed yourself.
You can't bathe yourself.Copy !req
501. You shit in a bag.
Stop me when any of thisCopy !req
502. sounds like someone who doesn't
need a fuckin' nurse.Copy !req
503. Then just take me to the park.Copy !req
504. Leave me there
and let me die in peace.Copy !req
505. Oh, see, viable option.
Even Terry thinks so.Copy !req
506. - Hi.
- Hi, I'm Jasmine.Copy !req
507. - You must be...
- Ian, yeah.Copy !req
508. Come on in.Copy !req
509. Mickey, Terry, this is Jasmine,Copy !req
510. Terry's in-home health aide.Copy !req
511. You got me a n—Copy !req
512. [Mickey, cheerfully] Nah—Copy !req
513. Nice lady to watch you
while we head to work.Copy !req
514. Yeah. You fuck this up,
I'ma cut your dick off.Copy !req
515. I wouldn't feel it anyway.Copy !req
516. Don't you all worry.Copy !req
517. I'm gonna take good care
of Dad here.Copy !req
518. Thanks. I know dealin' with
Terry is a pain in the ass.Copy !req
519. Fuckin' expensive,
but now I don't haveCopy !req
520. to worry about anything.
I can focus on work—Copy !req
521. Just forgot something
in my car.Copy !req
522. She's probably comin'
right back.Copy !req
523. Yeah.Copy !req
524. Gallagher, look alive.Copy !req
525. All right, look,
I want you toCopy !req
526. make a buy off this guy,
all right?Copy !req
527. Quarter bag.
Ask for it "dusty."Copy !req
528. All right.
But I don't have any money.Copy !req
529. Here.
All right?Copy !req
530. Hurry up.Copy !req
531. Look both ways
before you cross the street.Copy !req
532. Hey, man, I need a cop.Copy !req
533. Loud or reggie?Copy !req
534. Reggie. Quarter.
Make it dusty.Copy !req
535. 60.Copy !req
536. Freeze, fucker!
You're under arrest.Copy !req
537. - Turn around.
- You're a cop?Copy !req
538. Hands on your head.
Face the wall!Copy !req
539. What the fuck
are you doing, kid?Copy !req
540. Making the arrest
like you said to.Copy !req
541. No, stupid asshole!
We told you to make a buy.Copy !req
542. No one said anything
about making an arrest.Copy !req
543. Apologize to this guy.Copy !req
544. Uh, I'm... sorry?Copy !req
545. Keep the drugs, Gallagher.Copy !req
546. Let's get outta here, man.Copy !req
547. Come on!
Pulling guns out and shit!Copy !req
548. Oh, God, coke is fantastic.Copy !req
549. I know, right?Copy !req
550. Yeah. I can see why people
become junkiesCopy !req
551. and run away
from their responsibilities.Copy !req
552. - You know, for me,Copy !req
553. when it comes to drugs
versus, like, a job... pffft.Copy !req
554. Drugs win.Copy !req
555. What kinda jobs have you had?Copy !req
556. Ah!
Let's see, uh, I was a nurse.Copy !req
557. I was
an elementary school teacher.Copy !req
558. Addiction counselor.Copy !req
559. That was fun.
Ha ha.Copy !req
560. Uh, and now,Copy !req
561. the, uh, assistant manager
at the illustriousCopy !req
562. Mailbox Unlimited
Copy and Shipping Center.Copy !req
563. Oh!
Impressive.Copy !req
564. Is coke supposed to
make you horny?Copy !req
565. 'Cause I feel like
I need to...Copy !req
566. hump that box right there.Copy !req
567. Ahem.Copy !req
568. I'm... gay.Copy !req
569. Me too!Copy !req
570. Well, I haven't... been
with a girl since high school.Copy !req
571. It's like riding a bike.Copy !req
572. So all I gotta do
is put these decorations up,Copy !req
573. and I get free beer
for a week?Copy !req
574. Ha. Nice try.
Two days.Copy !req
575. I don't know, man.
There's a lotta stuff in here.Copy !req
576. - Week seems reasonable.
- All right, fine.Copy !req
577. You know what?
I'll just ask Kermit.Copy !req
578. - He'll probably do it for free.
- Fine!Copy !req
579. I accept your lowball offer.Copy !req
580. Hey, babe!Copy !req
581. How are you?
You doin' good?Copy !req
582. Feelin' better
that you saw your mom?Copy !req
583. No. She had to get something
from storage,Copy !req
584. - so might as well work.
- Okay, well,Copy !req
585. how 'bout we get outta here,
do something to cheer you up?Copy !req
586. No, thanks.
Here to work.Copy !req
587. How 'bout Ron Popeil?Copy !req
588. Ronco HQ was right down
the street.Copy !req
589. That's a great idea.Copy !req
590. Hugh Hefner Middle School, huh?Copy !req
591. - Think about it.
- Fellas. Ditka.Copy !req
592. Mike Ditka Middle School.
Contest over.Copy !req
593. - Ooh!
- What are you foolsCopy !req
594. talkin' about?Copy !req
595. Frank's trying to name
his old junior high.Copy !req
596. Why does it need a new name?Copy !req
597. It doesn't.
That's the point.Copy !req
598. It was fine the way it was.Copy !req
599. - Hear, hear.
- Nevertheless,Copy !req
600. I need a surefire winnerCopy !req
601. so it doesn't get cooptedCopy !req
602. by a bunch of politically
correct millennial activists.Copy !req
603. Last thing I need
is my son attendingCopy !req
604. Tofu Middle School of
Multicultural Granola Studies.Copy !req
605. What's it called now?Copy !req
606. Dennis Hastert Middle School.Copy !req
607. - The child molester?
- Former Speaker of the House.Copy !req
608. Why are you guys worried
about trying to protectCopy !req
609. some meaningless,
symbolic name anyway?Copy !req
610. How 'bout you try to protect
the real Chicago,Copy !req
611. the real South Side,Copy !req
612. the people and institutions
who make this town great?Copy !req
613. If you hadn't noticed, they're
being shut down every day.Copy !req
614. Because this renaming trend
is bullshit.Copy !req
615. It's just another way
for societyCopy !req
616. to erase the hard work
of white guys.Copy !req
617. Because at some point,
and who knows why,Copy !req
618. being a white guy
suddenly became uncool.Copy !req
619. Or maybe white guys are finally
being held accountableCopy !req
620. for all of the horrible stuff
they've done,Copy !req
621. like child molestation,
for example.Copy !req
622. And you, in particular,
don't have to worry aboutCopy !req
623. when white men became uncool,
'cause as far as I can tell,Copy !req
624. you've always been...
whatever this is.Copy !req
625. - Ha ha ha.
Ho ho ho!Copy !req
626. And, Frank,
why waste your time?Copy !req
627. Liam's gonna be outta that
school and on to a high schoolCopy !req
628. with an equally problematic
name in no time.Copy !req
629. They're trying to erase
the history of white menCopy !req
630. who built this great country.Copy !req
631. How far back are we goingCopy !req
632. with this revisionist
history crusade?Copy !req
633. Do we have to reexamine AdamCopy !req
634. at the Garden of Eden?Copy !req
635. You think Adam was white?Copy !req
636. Ha ha ha.Copy !req
637. The point is,
I went to that school.Copy !req
638. Best years of my life
in those halls,Copy !req
639. in those classrooms.Copy !req
640. Year I played baseball,
we had a bully on the team.Copy !req
641. Johnny Wisneiwski.Copy !req
642. A big, fat bruiser.
He could hit a ball...Copy !req
643. almost a mile.Copy !req
644. If you made an error
in the game,Copy !req
645. Johnny was sure to use
the wet end of his towelCopy !req
646. to rattail your genitals
in the showerCopy !req
647. to remind you of how useless
you were.Copy !req
648. Everybody was scared to death
of big, fat Johnny Wisneiwski.Copy !req
649. Well, one day, he thwacked
my naked wet assCopy !req
650. with that towel,
and I blew up.Copy !req
651. I pantsed him.
What do you think we saw?Copy !req
652. His dick.
I'm guessing you saw his dick.Copy !req
653. Not just any dick.Copy !req
654. The tiniest little button
of a pink dickCopy !req
655. you've ever laid your eyes on.Copy !req
656. And Johnny Wisneiwski's
reign of terrorCopy !req
657. ended that very day,
thanks to yours truly.Copy !req
658. I was king after that.Copy !req
659. And all my kids went there.Copy !req
660. There are Gallagher memoriesCopy !req
661. embedded in every inch
of that school.Copy !req
662. Should probably be called—Copy !req
663. No.Copy !req
664. It should definitely
be calledCopy !req
665. Gallagher Middle School.Copy !req
666. Gallagher Middle School.Copy !req
667. Outstan—
Gallagher Middle School!Copy !req
668. Jesus! Of course!Copy !req
669. Whadda ya say we do this:Copy !req
670. we go pick up the girls,
we stop for expensive froyoCopy !req
671. with all the fancy toppings,
huh?Copy !req
672. How many times I have to
tell you I'm not in the mood?Copy !req
673. I know, but I think today
could be really specialCopy !req
674. if we let it be.
It would make me happy,Copy !req
675. and I'm pretty sure
it could make you happy too.Copy !req
676. Please.
For me.Copy !req
677. The love of your life.Copy !req
678. Fuckin' froyo.Copy !req
679. Ohh...Copy !req
680. Hey, I'm gonna take a shower.Copy !req
681. And while I'm in there...Copy !req
682. Yep?Copy !req
683. Think up our next caper.Copy !req
684. - Caper?Copy !req
685. You a Batman villain?
- Uh, more like Bonnie.Copy !req
686. You know, Bonnie and Clyde?Copy !req
687. Yeah.
Think I mighta heard of them.Copy !req
688. Something where
we almost get caughtCopy !req
689. but then we get away with it.Copy !req
690. We could...Copy !req
691. - pull a bank robbery.
- Or a jewel heist.Copy !req
692. I mean...Copy !req
693. I would consider
murder for hire.Copy !req
694. Hey, uh,Copy !req
695. gotta go to this thing Liam's
doing at his school later.Copy !req
696. - Mm-hmm.
Wanna come?Copy !req
697. Yeah, yeah, I suppose
I can pretend to beCopy !req
698. a law-abiding citizen
for the night.Copy !req
699. Oh.Copy !req
700. Hey, Cami.Copy !req
701. Oh, wait.
Wait, wait, wait.Copy !req
702. Slow down.Copy !req
703. He was crying?
About what?Copy !req
704. - I'm confused.
What?Copy !req
705. The cops?Copy !req
706. They want Brad to come in
for questioning? When?Copy !req
707. No, no, he's gonna crack.Copy !req
708. He's on his way
to the station now?Copy !req
709. - Uh, when did he leave?
Shit, shit! Fuck!Copy !req
710. This lady should work.Copy !req
711. Terry doesn't have a problem
with Asian people, does he?Copy !req
712. I mean, I don't know.Copy !req
713. He likes a lot of Chinese food
and Bruce Lee movies.Copy !req
714. Found his porn stash once
when we were kids.Copy !req
715. Had a pretty decent amount
of Asian chicks in it.Copy !req
716. Then we got nothin'
to worry about.Copy !req
717. We should just get goin'.Copy !req
718. All right, the agency
said this one's tough?Copy !req
719. Yeah. Said she's one of those
Vietnamese boat people.Copy !req
720. Doesn't get much tougher
than that.Copy !req
721. Maybe I should ask the agencyCopy !req
722. for somebody white
this time, huh?Copy !req
723. Yep.Copy !req
724. This place is legal.
Yeah, it is.Copy !req
725. So then why you want me
to buy from them, then?Copy !req
726. Listen, this detailCopy !req
727. is a golden elevator.Copy !req
728. It'll take you
right to the top,Copy !req
729. wherever you wanna go.Copy !req
730. What're you thinking?Copy !req
731. - SWAT?
Oh, shit.Copy !req
732. Grenades?
Assault rifles?Copy !req
733. - I love SWAT.
- That's only gonna happenCopy !req
734. if we give you
a good recommendation,Copy !req
735. and we're only gonna do thatCopy !req
736. if you do what we say,
no questions.Copy !req
737. You wanna ride that golden
elevator, don't you?Copy !req
738. Yes, sir, I do.Copy !req
739. Good boy.Copy !req
740. Go make the buy.Copy !req
741. Uh, sirs, quick question.
Why me?Copy !req
742. You know, like, out of
all the rookies in the city,Copy !req
743. why pick me?Copy !req
744. While your personal
assessment indicatesCopy !req
745. that you might ask
a lotta fuckin' questions,Copy !req
746. you're likely to accept
anything we tell you is true.Copy !req
747. Huh.Copy !req
748. Roger that.Copy !req
749. Hey, have you guys
seen my friend Debbie?Copy !req
750. Redhead, had a little
too much to drink?Copy !req
751. Debbie?Copy !req
752. Jared?
What the fuck?Copy !req
753. - Who is that?
- My husband.Copy !req
754. Debbie, wait.
Come inside.Copy !req
755. Let's talk.
Debbie!Copy !req
756. Where'd
your butt buddy go?Copy !req
757. To pick up your next victim.Copy !req
758. - I don't need no nurse.
- Well, maybe if you weren'tCopy !req
759. such a ragin' asshole,
your family'd take care of you,Copy !req
760. and we wouldn't have to pay
someone to be nice to ya.Copy !req
761. Ugh.Copy !req
762. - That tastes like dog food!
- Keep complainin',Copy !req
763. I will feed you dog food
for real.Copy !req
764. Ugh.Copy !req
765. Oh, no, no—Copy !req
766. - Come—
- Mm-mm.Copy !req
767. You woulda probably made
a half-decent sonCopy !req
768. if it wasn't for
that whole fudge packer thing.Copy !req
769. Well, you probably woulda made
a half-decent dadCopy !req
770. if it weren't for the whole...Copy !req
771. racist, homophobic, beatin'
the shit outta me thing.Copy !req
772. Have a good one.Copy !req
773. Good work, kid.Copy !req
774. Oh, wait—there's
a lotta street weed in there.Copy !req
775. You contaminated
the evidence now.Copy !req
776. - You're mixing it up!
- Naw, man!Copy !req
777. Your eyes is playin'
tricks on you, kid.Copy !req
778. You're literally
doing it on purpose.Copy !req
779. Why?
Oh, come on.Copy !req
780. I deserve to know
what I'm involved in.Copy !req
781. The weed you bought
on the streetCopy !req
782. was laced with angel dust.Copy !req
783. Now the dispensary weed is too.Copy !req
784. So now we can file criminal
charges against the dispensary.Copy !req
785. Why?Copy !req
786. Because the legal weed is
cutting into our bottom line.Copy !req
787. If legal dispensaries put all
the street dealers outta work,Copy !req
788. what's left for us, huh?Copy !req
789. You know how much we make
off of kickback in bribesCopy !req
790. - from street dealers?
- But isn't that wrong?Copy !req
791. Paid for my boat.Copy !req
792. It paid for
my second mistress'sCopy !req
793. first Brazilian butt lift.Copy !req
794. We frame legal shops,
we shut 'em down,Copy !req
795. we get more illegal weed
back on the street.Copy !req
796. More illegal weed
equals more dealers,Copy !req
797. more dealers equals
more cash in our pockets.Copy !req
798. So, really, it's up to you,
Gallagher.Copy !req
799. You want some kickbacks?Copy !req
800. Or you wanna spend
the rest of your careerCopy !req
801. bustin' your hump,
poundin' a beat?Copy !req
802. Fine.
Let me help.Copy !req
803. Good. So how many more
dispensariesCopy !req
804. do we gotta put
outta business today?Copy !req
805. Uh looks like five.Copy !req
806. Next up is Dank Dorm,Copy !req
807. then New Leaf Collective,
Heavy Fog,Copy !req
808. New Heights,
and last but not least,Copy !req
809. The Alibi Room.Copy !req
810. All right, let's get it.Copy !req
811. Brad's not pickin' up.
- Well, this is the stationCopy !req
812. closest to his house,
so if he's going anywhere,Copy !req
813. it's here.Copy !req
814. Think he can hold up
under an interrogation?Copy !req
815. Hell, no.Copy !req
816. Wait.
There he is. Okay.Copy !req
817. All right, do what you gotta do
to keep him quiet.Copy !req
818. Hey, man.Copy !req
819. Brad?Copy !req
820. Brad.
Brad! H—Copy !req
821. Brad! Brad!Copy !req
822. Ah! Let me go!Copy !req
823. Get off me!
I'm gonna confess!Copy !req
824. Shh, shh!Copy !req
825. Let me go!
It's the only way!Copy !req
826. Shut the fuck up, all right?Copy !req
827. Talk to us.
We only wanna talk, all right?Copy !req
828. Go, go, go!Copy !req
829. Just in here.Copy !req
830. Terry,
this is Sister Mary Luke.Copy !req
831. Oh,
just Mary Luke is fine.Copy !req
832. My days in a habit
are long gone.Copy !req
833. You must be Terry.Copy !req
834. I should warn you,
he's been a handful today.Copy !req
835. You idiots got me
a fuckin' nun?Copy !req
836. - Watch your languageCopy !req
837. in the presence of ladies.Copy !req
838. - Jesus Christ, lady!Copy !req
839. And we'll not take
the Lord's name in vain.Copy !req
840. Before the diocese
shut my convent down,Copy !req
841. I was tending
to the elderly sisters.Copy !req
842. Sister Cecilia had dementiaCopy !req
843. and a colorful vocabulary.Copy !req
844. I found that a-a swift smack
usually fixed her behavior.Copy !req
845. - Yeah, that works for me.
- Solid strategy.Copy !req
846. There he is!Copy !req
847. I have an exciting offer
for you.Copy !req
848. I'd like to give you a chance
to abandon your lame entryCopy !req
849. into the name change contest
and join forces with me.Copy !req
850. - Why would I do that?
- Because I'm gonna win.Copy !req
851. The Francis Gallagher
and Children Middle School.Copy !req
852. Thanks, but no thanks.
I really want that iPad.Copy !req
853. I don't give a damn
about the iPa—Copy !req
854. well, I mean, if we won,
we'd pawn it,Copy !req
855. and I'd take a cut,
but that's not the point.Copy !req
856. We have to preserve
the-the Gallagher legacy.Copy !req
857. We'd never be forgotten.
We'd be immortal.Copy !req
858. Yeah, I'm good, man.Copy !req
859. I'm-I'm not gonna make
this offer again.Copy !req
860. Well, suit yourself.Copy !req
861. I have to hit the head.Copy !req
862. No TP in there.Copy !req
863. You know, I-I wanna—Copy !req
864. I wanted to talk to you
about somethin'.Copy !req
865. I think we should team up
on the name change contest.Copy !req
866. Now, b-before you say no,Copy !req
867. I should tell you
what my idea is.Copy !req
868. The Francis Gallagher
and Children Middle School.Copy !req
869. You literally just told me this
30 seconds ago.Copy !req
870. I did?Copy !req
871. - What'd you say?
- No, Frank!Copy !req
872. Hmm.Copy !req
873. Hmm.Copy !req
874. No toilet paper
in here.Copy !req
875. No way, dude—Veronica'll
put my nuts in a table vice.Copy !req
876. Yeah, well, if you don't
get rid of their weed,Copy !req
877. - she'll be in jail.
Okay, I'll tell themCopy !req
878. if I see them,
but there's no wayCopy !req
879. I'm touching their product
without talking to them first.Copy !req
880. Hey,
what was that last placeCopy !req
881. we were supposed to hit today?Copy !req
882. The A-Alibi Room?Copy !req
883. I think that's it, right?Copy !req
884. Well, if it's the place
I'm thinkin' of,Copy !req
885. it's really not worth
bustin'--Copy !req
886. low-rent, mom/pop spot,
couple of stale weed brownies,Copy !req
887. nickel bags—
we shouldn't waste our time.Copy !req
888. The list is the list.Copy !req
889. We got three more
after lunch,Copy !req
890. and then it's on to—
what'd you call it?Copy !req
891. The Alibi Room.Copy !req
892. Hello.Copy !req
893. What?
For how long?Copy !req
894. I had no idea.Copy !req
895. Someone else
was supposed to pick her up—Copy !req
896. m-my girlfriend.Copy !req
897. Well, I-I'm so sorry,Copy !req
898. but I can promise you
that I would never abandonCopy !req
899. my daughter at school.
I was at work, I—Copy !req
900. When you're
a single working motherCopy !req
901. trying to provide for a kid,
things like this happen.Copy !req
902. Hello?Copy !req
903. Hi, Franny.Copy !req
904. Mommy's on her way, honey.Copy !req
905. I know.
Mommy misses you too, honey.Copy !req
906. I'll be right there.Copy !req
907. Hey, baby, I got somethingCopy !req
908. that'll put a smile
on your face... right here.Copy !req
909. You know what?
Actually, I would love that.Copy !req
910. For real?Copy !req
911. Oh—fuck! Uhh—Copy !req
912. You just checked your messages,
like, two minutes ago.Copy !req
913. And shouldn't you be
keeping a look outCopy !req
914. in case someone tries to, like,
rob us or somethin'?Copy !req
915. You think she knows
how to insertCopy !req
916. the little piss tube thing—Copy !req
917. The catheter, yes.Copy !req
918. Maybe I should just
give her a call,Copy !req
919. make sure everything's okay.Copy !req
920. We're finally
getting work done.Copy !req
921. Can we please just concentrate
for a couple more hours?Copy !req
922. Thank you.Copy !req
923. Maybe we should swing by
after the next stop,Copy !req
924. you know,
make sure she's okay.Copy !req
925. And another one bites the dust.Copy !req
926. Yes, one more down,
and it is Miller time!Copy !req
927. Alibi Room—let's finish it
off strong, boys.Copy !req
928. Hop in, kid.
Time's a-wastin'.Copy !req
929. Uh, hey, can I drive?Copy !req
930. No.Copy !req
931. Come on, you guys've been
driving all day.Copy !req
932. Polishing your aviators,
workin' on your tan,Copy !req
933. while I've been doin'
all the work.Copy !req
934. - Yeah, so?
- I've never drivenCopy !req
935. a Ferrari before.Copy !req
936. I wanna feel
some Italian horsepower.Copy !req
937. This might be my only chance.Copy !req
938. All right, son.Copy !req
939. Let's see what you got.Copy !req
940. Long as it ain't mine.Copy !req
941. But w-we gotta turn—
turn ourselves in.Copy !req
942. No, no. If the cops
thought you knew anything,Copy !req
943. they would've come, and they
would've picked you up.Copy !req
944. Th-they called me to come
down for questioning, Lip.Copy !req
945. - They know!
- They don't know shit.Copy !req
946. I wanna come clean, okay?Copy !req
947. Ma-make some kinda deal
and return all the stuff.Copy !req
948. You wanna make a deal?
- Yeah.Copy !req
949. You're gonna fuck both of us,
okay?Copy !req
950. There's no way that
they're gonna believeCopy !req
951. that you stole all that shit
by yourself.Copy !req
952. Well, I-I won't give up you
or Mickey!Copy !req
953. - I swear!
- Uh, Lip,Copy !req
954. help me make a bottle
for Fred in the kitchen.Copy !req
955. - Now.
- Yeah.Copy !req
956. He is not gonna lastCopy !req
957. five minutes with the cops.Copy !req
958. You need to do something.Copy !req
959. Do something?
Like what?Copy !req
960. Get rid of the evidence,
for starters!Copy !req
961. I haven't found a place
to sell the parts yet.Copy !req
962. Okay, let's just wait
for the ideal buyerCopy !req
963. while the cops close in!Copy !req
964. - Cops aren't closing in.
They will be!Copy !req
965. Okay? As soon as they get
Brad in a room at the stationCopy !req
966. and he starts crying
and confessing...Copy !req
967. I don't know,
maybe we should just...Copy !req
968. take care of him.Copy !req
969. Take—meaning what, exactly?Copy !req
970. Meaning...Copy !req
971. take care of him.Copy !req
972. Wow, this whole, uh,
life of crime thing for youCopy !req
973. is gettin' a little bit
outta hand,Copy !req
974. - don't ya think, Capone?
- No! No, because he isCopy !req
975. gonna get everyone busted.Copy !req
976. I am involved now, okay?Copy !req
977. Who is gonna raise Fred
if we both end up in jail?Copy !req
978. Okay, yeah, he does seem
a little bit fragile.Copy !req
979. Oh, yeah, no shit!Copy !req
980. We can't let him
out of our sight.Copy !req
981. Fuck!Copy !req
982. I need to take a rain check
on family bar night.Copy !req
983. What?Copy !req
984. No, no, no, no.
You love family bar night.Copy !req
985. - Cartoons on the TV...
I love cartoons.Copy !req
986. - The pizza.
I love pizza.Copy !req
987. All the soda the girls
can drink—come on, V.Copy !req
988. I appreciate your trying
to cheer me up,Copy !req
989. but I just wanna go home
and take a nap.Copy !req
990. You can close up
by yourself, right?Copy !req
991. - Come on, girls.
- No, wait, I'm sorry,Copy !req
992. but I can't let you go.Copy !req
993. Sorry I'm late!Copy !req
994. Ma?Copy !req
995. - I-is that your wedding dress?
Yeah.Copy !req
996. I just pulled it
out of storage... for you.Copy !req
997. - For me?
Mm-hmm.Copy !req
998. What's goin' on?Copy !req
999. It's not family bar night.Copy !req
1000. It was never family bar night.Copy !req
1001. You remember how we wanted
to get married at City Hall,Copy !req
1002. but they cancelled everything
'cause of the shutdown?Copy !req
1003. Well, they're clearing
their backlog.Copy !req
1004. They're doing weddings
on Zoom.Copy !req
1005. - We're gettin' married?
- Yes.Copy !req
1006. Right now?Copy !req
1007. Right now.Copy !req
1008. - You good?
- Yeah. Don't I seem good?Copy !req
1009. You're drivin'
like my grandma.Copy !req
1010. Thought you wanted to feel
some Italian horsepower.Copy !req
1011. I'm just being cautious.Copy !req
1012. There's cautious,Copy !req
1013. and then there's
whatever this is.Copy !req
1014. Giddy up, kid.Copy !req
1015. That a boy.Copy !req
1016. Okay.Copy !req
1017. All right, that's enough.Copy !req
1018. That's enough, kid.Copy !req
1019. Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down!
Slow the fuck down!Copy !req
1020. I don't know what's going on.
It's outta control!Copy !req
1021. Brake, brake, brake!Copy !req
1022. Oh... what the fuck?Copy !req
1023. What the fuck
is wrong with you?Copy !req
1024. Piece of shit!Copy !req
1025. Man, what the hell?Copy !req
1026. You fuck!
I told youCopy !req
1027. don't let Billie Eilish
drive the car!Copy !req
1028. Mommy'll be right up, baby.Copy !req
1029. Rough day?Copy !req
1030. I didn't expect you
to be here.Copy !req
1031. No, I wasn't.
I left.Copy !req
1032. But then I came back,
because I thoughtCopy !req
1033. I should tell you to your face
how big of a bitch you are.Copy !req
1034. Mission accomplished.Copy !req
1035. You know, we both said
some things we shouldn't have.Copy !req
1036. But I'm open
to talking it out.Copy !req
1037. I'm not.Copy !req
1038. What do you mean?Copy !req
1039. I don't think I could be
with a person like you, Sandy.Copy !req
1040. A person like me.
Wow.Copy !req
1041. You left your kid.Copy !req
1042. So what did you do last night
and then again all day today?Copy !req
1043. - Is that not the same, or—
- I blew off some steamCopy !req
1044. for less than a day.Copy !req
1045. And it sucked,
and now I'm back.Copy !req
1046. With my kid.Copy !req
1047. Can you say the same
about you and Prince?Copy !req
1048. No, that is not fair.
I told you why I left Prince.Copy !req
1049. - I was 15 years old.
- Oh, my God.Copy !req
1050. I've heard
all of your excuses, Sandy,Copy !req
1051. and they sound great
coming out of your mouth.Copy !req
1052. But at the end of the day,Copy !req
1053. you walked out on somebody
that needed you.Copy !req
1054. I've got my entire family
trying to leave me.Copy !req
1055. I don't need to be worried
about you too.Copy !req
1056. You fucking...Copy !req
1057. You should see the scene
out there.Copy !req
1058. Some idiot drove his Ferrari
into a parked car.Copy !req
1059. What, she's not ready yet?
We're gonna miss our time slot.Copy !req
1060. - Is this dress too much?
- Excuse me?Copy !req
1061. - What's wrong with my dress?
Nothin'.Copy !req
1062. It's perfect.Copy !req
1063. Are we really doing this?Copy !req
1064. I think so.Copy !req
1065. Dominic!
No, honey,Copy !req
1066. look, that is for
after they get married.Copy !req
1067. Kay?
Oh, hey, hey, hey.Copy !req
1068. I think they're ready
for y'all.Copy !req
1069. Yes, sir, I'm ready.Copy !req
1070. Me too.Copy !req
1071. Dominic!Copy !req
1072. I'm gonna beat
your little ass—sit down!Copy !req
1073. Yes, sir.Copy !req
1074. We'll just check in on him
real quick,Copy !req
1075. and then we got to get
to Liam's school.Copy !req
1076. - We're already late.
- In and out, all right?Copy !req
1077. I promise.Copy !req
1078. Where's Terry?Copy !req
1079. Your father...
he's an evil man.Copy !req
1080. No shit.
What're you doin' out here?Copy !req
1081. I had to handle him
the same wayCopy !req
1082. I handled Sister Cecilia.Copy !req
1083. Yeah, the slap to the back
of the head thing, right?Copy !req
1084. No.
- What? Like drugs?Copy !req
1085. - Fuckin' loves those.
No.Copy !req
1086. A return to sit at the feet
of our Lord and SaviorCopy !req
1087. in death.Copy !req
1088. Sorry, did you just say death?Copy !req
1089. Okay, we'll now take a minute
to consider the suggestionCopy !req
1090. of Mahatma Gandhi
Academy of Peace.Copy !req
1091. What's up, buddy?Copy !req
1092. Where is everybody?Copy !req
1093. Fuck 'em.
What'd I miss?Copy !req
1094. They already rejectedCopy !req
1095. Martin Luther King
Middle SchoolCopy !req
1096. because MLK was a womanizer.Copy !req
1097. Then they rejected
Barack ObamaCopy !req
1098. because of his "use of drones
in the Middle East."Copy !req
1099. They even said no
to Michael Jordan.Copy !req
1100. Whoa, the GOAT?Copy !req
1101. His gambling sets
a bad example.Copy !req
1102. Tough crowd.Copy !req
1103. Hey, why's Frank
sittin' over there?Copy !req
1104. Said if I'm not with him,
I'm against him.Copy !req
1105. I guess we're enemies.Copy !req
1106. Unfortunately, I don't
think we can further considerCopy !req
1107. Mahatma Gandhi Academy
of Peace.Copy !req
1108. We've been made aware ofCopy !req
1109. some problematic
century-old commentsCopy !req
1110. Mr. Gandhi made
about Black Africans.Copy !req
1111. They're... disqualifying.Copy !req
1112. Up next to propose
a new name,Copy !req
1113. Francis Gallagher,Copy !req
1114. class of 1968.Copy !req
1115. Uh... thank you,
madam... president.Copy !req
1116. Thank you.
What I'd like to, uh,Copy !req
1117. to talk about today...Copy !req
1118. is, um...Copy !req
1119. Obviously,
I'm here to address,Copy !req
1120. uh, t-the—uh...Copy !req
1121. I would like to address,
uh, the...Copy !req
1122. Uh... gimme a second.Copy !req
1123. It'll come to me.Copy !req
1124. I can't seem to remember
what I had to say.Copy !req
1125. Um, I don't think...Copy !req
1126. Memory's funny, isn't it?
It's like...Copy !req
1127. sand through your fingers.Copy !req
1128. Sometimes you can grab it,
and sometimes...Copy !req
1129. That damn fragile thing,
it's...Copy !req
1130. all that'll be left of us.Copy !req
1131. All of us, at some point...Copy !req
1132. Just a memory.Copy !req
1133. And let me tell ya,
if you haven't made a mark,Copy !req
1134. now, while you're kickin'...Copy !req
1135. you don't even get that.Copy !req
1136. Uh...Copy !req
1137. uh...Copy !req
1138. Johnny?Copy !req
1139. Johnny Wisneiwski?Copy !req
1140. Hey!Copy !req
1141. Why don't you show everybody
your little baby dick?Copy !req
1142. - Come on!Copy !req
1143. I-I know the rest of the teamCopy !req
1144. would really get
a kick outta that, huh?Copy !req
1145. I tell you what I'm gonna do.
I'll go first.Copy !req
1146. - Okay? Come on, Johnny.Copy !req
1147. Mr. Gallagher—
Hey, hey, back up!Copy !req
1148. That's my dad, asshole!
CPD!Copy !req
1149. What'd Frank do
this time?Copy !req
1150. He really lost it today.Copy !req
1151. Stripped naked at Liam's school
in front of a bunch of kids.Copy !req
1152. Only thing I could do to
prevent him from going to jailCopy !req
1153. was badging everyone there,
taking him to the ER.Copy !req
1154. He's still getting
evaluated.Copy !req
1155. Debs, you okay?Copy !req
1156. I've had a day.Copy !req
1157. Yeah.
Yeah.Copy !req
1158. I guess
that makes all of us.Copy !req
1159. A nun killed Mickey's dad.Copy !req
1160. Terry's dead?Copy !req
1161. As a doornail.Copy !req
1162. Damn! A nun?Copy !req
1163. God really does work in
mysterious ways, doesn't she?Copy !req
1164. Hey, sorry I missed your thing.Copy !req
1165. Terry's dying kinda threw
a wrench in our schedule.Copy !req
1166. - How'd it go?
- I think I did all right.Copy !req
1167. - Whoa!
- Hey!Copy !req
1168. - Shit, man!
- Nice!Copy !req
1169. What name did ya
end up pitching?Copy !req
1170. Well, when I realized
they had a problemCopy !req
1171. with every famous person's name
that anybody suggested,Copy !req
1172. I just thought
I'll play it safe,Copy !req
1173. so from now on, it's just gonna
be called The Middle School.Copy !req
1174. Nice one, man.Copy !req
1175. Hi.Copy !req
1176. What's going on?Copy !req
1177. - Where's Brad?
- Locked in the car.Copy !req
1178. Handcuffed to the door.
He's calmed down,Copy !req
1179. but he is a ticking bomb.
We gotta do somethingCopy !req
1180. - before he goes to the cops.Copy !req
1181. Okay, so all
of Mr. Gallagher's behaviorCopy !req
1182. can be explained by
his previous diagnosis.Copy !req
1183. We didn't find evidence
of anything new.Copy !req
1184. Sorry,
his-his previous diagnosis?Copy !req
1185. Well, we treated Mr. Gallagher
three weeks ago,Copy !req
1186. did a neurological assessment,
and arrived at a diagnosisCopy !req
1187. of alcoholic dementia.Copy !req
1188. I'm... sorry. I thought
he would have told you by now.Copy !req
1189. I'm sure I mentioned it.Copy !req
1190. No.
You didn't.Copy !req
1191. I'm sorry.
What is alcoholic dementia?Copy !req
1192. Basically, he pickled his brain
with decades of drinking,Copy !req
1193. and now his mind
is calling it quits.Copy !req
1194. It involves significant
impairments of memoryCopy !req
1195. and other cognitive functions.Copy !req
1196. Were you aware that your father
is an alcoholic?Copy !req
1197. There's been
some evidence of that, yeah.Copy !req
1198. Some days will be good,
and some will be bad.Copy !req
1199. Very bad.Copy !req
1200. It won't be
a linear progression.Copy !req
1201. You have to be prepared
to go along for the ride.Copy !req
1202. And try not to contradict him.Copy !req
1203. That leads to confusion
and anger.Copy !req
1204. Excuse me.Copy !req
1205. What are we doin'
in the hospital?Copy !req
1206. One of you have another kid?Copy !req
1207. No, you-you've got dementia.Copy !req
1208. From bein' a drunk, Frank.Copy !req