Sex Education 4x5

1. Come on.

2. - Oh.

3. Yeah.

4. Fuck.

5. Oh no.

6. Oh! The burning!

7. Fucking hell.

8. - Mum, what's wrong? - Go away!

9. - Why are you here? - What were you doing with my chili oil?

10. Pepper!

11. Guys, eggs are chicken period, aren't they?

12. Morning. I'm taking Elsie to school.

13. Are you guys going to college? It's been three days.

14. So unless your parents tell me it's okay, I think you need to go.

15. Yeah, my mum's been asking, but rock 'n' roll.

16. - I don't care. I'm not scared. - I can take another day. It'll be fine.

17. - Yeah. - No, no, no.

18. I'm gonna go to the funeral home with Sean today,

19. so you two should go back to college.

20. Okay, I am actually really scared.

21. - I'll go get ready. - Okay.

22. Thanks for brekkie.

23. Do you wanna do something later?

24. Like, go out. You and me.

25. Okay, just to clarify,

26. because I've got this wrong in the past... do you mean a date?

27. Yeah, I mean a date.

28. Are you sure?

29. Just with what's goin' on at the moment?

30. Yeah, I'm sure.

31. I think it would really help to take my mind off things.

32. - You know? - Yeah. No. Let's... let's go on a date.

33. It'll be fun.

34. Okay, great. Yes. Yeah.

35. Thanks for letting me walk you to college. Oh, and, um... good luck with the test.

36. - Walkin' to college together already?

37. - It's gettin' serious! - Shut up.

38. - But I know, right? - Mmm!

39. - He's taking me to Martha Street Cinema. - Oh!

40. They're playing all the old movies this week.

41. How are you feeling? I was worried about you.

42. Oh, I'm okay. Been trying not to think about it too much, to be honest.

43. And I've decided, yeah? I wanna find my sperm donor.

44. - So grim. I heard that about him. - I know. Everyone...

45. Um... wow! That's kind of a big deal.

46. Well, yeah.

47. My parents don't talk about donor stuff, you know, like, ever.

48. They made me this book when I was a kid. That was the end of the conversation.

49. But I wanna know, you know, like... where I come from.

50. Are you gonna try and tell your parents that you're doing this?

51. Yeah, I will at some point.

52. Jackson, you have to tell them.

53. Yeah, I will.

54. So, I have had an idea,

55. and you can totally say no.

56. Try me.

57. Okay, well, you know the other day at the soup kitchen?

58. - Yeah. - I wasn't supposed to go, obviously.

59. But I feel like I was led there.

60. - And this is silly. This is silly. This... - No, don't worry. I do get it. Go on.

61. Okay, well, I then found out that its funding has been cut,

62. and it just all felt like it was supposed to be or something.

63. And I was wondering whether we could use the fundraiser for that.

64. - Roman might take a bit of persuading. - Yeah.

65. But queer people holding out an olive branch to the church?

66. I feel it's givin' "We are gay Jesus."

67. - We are... We totally are gay Jesus. - We're gay Jesus.

68. - In the name of the Father, the Son... - Girl!

69. - Ah! - No, I love it. Let's do it.

70. - Yeah? Oh my God. Oh! - Yeah. 100%. That'll be so good for us.

71. Thank you, Abbi. Thank you. I feel like it'll mean so much to my mum...

72. I'll leave you guys to catch up. I'll see you in a bit.

73. Okay.

74. Yeah, it was so funny...

75. Hey, Otis.

76. Um, hey.

77. I have been wanting to say sorry about the club night

78. because it was awkward and not nice, and I feel terrible.

79. - Yeah... It's fine. - And it was awk—

80. It's fine. Honestly. Like...

81. It probably wasn't even my thing. But I need to tell you something.

82. It happened that night, and I'm feeling really weird about it. Basically...

83. me and Ruby fell asleep together.

84. Nothing happened.

85. But we were hangin' out all night, and we woke up in the same bed.

86. Oh... gosh.

87. Yeah.

88. - Have you told Maeve? - Mm, no.

89. We weren't really speaking when it happened.

90. And... I know it didn't mean anything, but I need to tell her.

91. But her fuckin' mum's just died. So, I don't know.

92. - It's, like, the wrong... time. - Mmm... mmm...

93. Well, the longer you leave that, the more of a secret it's gonna feel.

94. - Yep. - Yeah.

95. How was the club?

96. Oh-ho!

97. It was amazing! I got with the hottest guy ever.

98. - From my church. - She was on it one time!

99. Oh! Otis! You're back!

100. I was worried I'd have no one to debate.

101. I loved chattin' to your mum, by the way. She told me so much about you.

102. I forgot about the debate.

103. Oh shit.

104. Okay, um... I gotta go.

105. Nice chattin'.

106. That was a nice chat about my life.

107. Ruby, hey.

108. So, O is calling herself the "Star of Sexology," which is a lie.

109. - Is that even allowed? - No, it's called "spin," Otis.

110. So, I haven't... really had any time to prepare anything for the debate.

111. You don't have any notes for me, do you?

112. No. Why would I have that?

113. Because you're my campaign manager.

114. I was your campaign manager.

115. Then you stopped responding to my texts and disappeared for three days.

116. So you're on your own.

117. Uh, you're right, and I should've... I'm sorry.

118. Wait, please. I should have texted you.

119. It's just Maeve's mum just died, and I've been a bit all over the place.

120. And I'm rubbish at this whole election thing without you.

121. - Please?

122. I'm sorry about Maeve's mum.

123. Thanks.

124. Okay. You don't have a lot of time to prepare.

125. You want to deliver your mission statement in a concise way. Don't ramble.

126. - I don't ramble. - You do. You ramble, Otis.

127. - Sexology!

128. - Sexology! - Did you get any dirt on her?

129. No, everyone at this college is so sweet and good-natured. It's disgusting, really.

130. - I'll find you later.

131. - Vote O! - Ruby.

132. Oh, that is good.

133. We have some information for you.

134. - It's about O. - Oh?

135. Work, you big metal fuck!

136. It's broken again, mate. I've called an engineer.

137. Great. When are they getting here?

138. Tomorrow, hopefully, but it took three days last time.

139. So, how am I supposed to get to my class now, then?

140. I'm not sure.

141. That's a tricky one. Maybe I could carry you.

142. Could you? Really?

143. Me, my chair, up two flights of stairs.

144. I've broken my neck once. I'd rather not do it again, but thank you.

145. I could set up a classroom down here for you.

146. Yeah.

147. Ah-ah-ah.

148. Can I take Isaac's stuff down to him? He says the lift's broken again.

149. Yeah, of course.

150. This fucking college.

151. - Hey, there. - Hiya.

152. - Thank you. - You're welcome.

153. - How's Maeve doing? - Oh my God. I'm so worried about her.

154. - It's awful. - Yeah.

155. Her mum was complicated, but...

156. Yeah, I really liked her.

157. Hey, how are your photos going?

158. - Good, I think. - Yeah?

159. - Yeah! - Good.

160. - How do I get them out of this? - Ah. We need to use a darkroom.

161. Which, luckily for you, is on the ground floor.

162. - What do you think? - They're hideous.

163. Right.

164. Which means Mum would have liked them.

165. How much do you think they cost?

166. Sean?

167. - Boo! - Fuck's sake. That's not funny.

168. You've gotta try it before you buy it. This one's good. Very comfy.

169. - Grow up.

170. I'm very sorry for your loss.

171. Thank you. Sean, get out of the box.

172. - Hi. Nice to meet you, mate. - So, how can I help?

173. We've never done this before.

174. Um... ahem. How does it work?

175. Did your mother leave behind any instructions?

176. - No, she wasn't much of a planner.

177. Do you know if she wanted a burial or a cremation?

178. - Burial. - Cremation. Cremation.

179. She told me she didn't want her exes visiting her grave.

180. Don't like the idea of her gettin' burned.

181. I don't like the idea of her being stuck underground. She was claustrophobic.

182. - You can think about it. Please. - All right.

183. So, how many people will you be expecting?

184. Absolutely no one. Mum didn't have friends.

185. - People didn't like her. - That's not really true. She had friends.

186. - Really? - Mm-hmm.

187. - Name one friend. - Sh... um...

188. Uh...

189. Exactly. Anyway, it's good news for us.

190. It doesn't matter if it's a shit funeral if no one's there.

191. - Fuck's sake, Sean.

192. An intimate funeral, then.

193. Yeah, an intimate funeral. God, you're a good salesman.

194. I'll give you a moment alone to discuss, but here are all our packages.

195. - Right. - Thank you.

196. - Fuckin' hell.

197. Well, I guess it's a cremation, then, isn't it?

198. - Right.

199. I have to take this. Sorry.

200. - Sean. - Two seconds. Two seconds.

201. - Hey. Yeah. Yeah, mate.

202. She cries a lot. I find it hard to settle her.

203. And... and she makes these grunting sounds after she's feeding.

204. And she does these unbelievable projectile poos.

205. I was wondering if it had to do with her being premature.

206. No, I don't think so.

207. Joy is a very healthy baby. Yeah.

208. - Really? - There we are.

209. Such a relief.

210. I didn't realize how anxious I was about today.

211. And how is Mum's mood?

212. Oh, I'm fine. Just... I'm a bit tired.

213. Your mood is not okay. She cries all of the time.

214. She's stressed and forgetful and touchy as fuck.

215. You're not right. Sorry.

216. Can I speak to Jean alone for a moment?

217. - Oh, I'm her sister. It's fine. - Jo!

218. Fine.

219. - Okay.

220. A bit of blueness is normal after a baby.

221. But feeling constantly anxious and low isn't.

222. I can see from your notes that you've had a previous period of depression.

223. Yes. Well, that was ten years ago.

224. I mention this because birthing parents

225. who've previously struggled with mental health

226. are more susceptible to postnatal depression.

227. Yes.

228. Would you consider trying some medication?

229. No. Thank you. But, um...

230. I know that my hormones are all over the place

231. and that it's normal.

232. And when I was depressed before, I got through it without medication,

233. and I'd like to try that again.

234. Well, we'll keep an eye on things.

235. Thank you.

236. Thanks a lot. She tried to prescribe me medication.

237. Well, that's good. I think you might need some.

238. Why are you being so weird about it?

239. Because you embarrassed me, that's why.

240. Because I know my own brain.

241. I'm fine.

242. Anyway, I have to go to the studio. Can you take her?

243. No, I... I can't take her. And you don't get to snap my head off whenever you want.

244. You said you weren't doing anything.

245. My plans changed. I've got a second date, and I need to get my hoo-hoo waxed.

246. When did you go on a first date?

247. And it's not a hoo-hoo! It's a vulva!

248. Absolutely.

249. Any students wishing to attend the student counselor debate,

250. please make your way to the atrium.

251. Otis! I have got some information that looks very, very bad for O.

252. - I feel like a wizard in this bit.

253. Abracadabra!

254. - Hey, I think it's quite good. - Yeah, that's great.

255. What made you wanna paint your foster homes?

256. Um...

257. Hmm.

258. - So I lived with nine different families. - Wow.

259. Every time we'd get settled, they'd just move us on to the next one.

260. There was one family that did actually want to, uh... adopt my brother and me,

261. but, uh... that fell through.

262. The whole system is just broken, and it makes me angry.

263. So I paint about it.

264. I still don't know what I wanna say with my photos.

265. - Aimee. - Yeah?

266. - You literally never stop talking. - What?

267. So you've definitely got plenty to say.

268. Stop underestimating yourself. That's all I'd say.

269. Thank you.

270. Aimee, I, um—

271. Please stop talking, 'cause I think I know what you're gonna say.

272. I think I like you.

273. I think I like you too.

274. - Shit. This is really terrible. - What do we do?

275. I need to talk to Maeve.

276. - Right. Is that me?

277. See you there.

278. Uh...

279. Hey, Frog. You ready?

280. Yeah, who was that?

281. - Wanted a lighter. I said no. - Did he?

282. Yeah. What the fuck are you doing?

283. - Get off that fucking bag! - No. Let go. I'm not doing anything—

284. - Have you started dealing again? - No. No, I haven't.

285. - Are you using? - No, of course I'm not using.

286. - Fucking lying to me! - Fuck off. I said I'm not.

287. - Show me your arm. - Fuck, Maeve!

288. All right! Calm down.

289. Maybe I have started using a little bit. It's not a big deal. I'm gonna stop soon.

290. You're a fucking idiot, Sean. Fucking idiot!

291. - Oh, get off your high horse, Maeve! - Fuck you, Sean!

292. You might be smarter than me,

293. but we came from exactly the same shithole!

294. - All right, Cavendish.

295. What's up?

296. It's O here.

297. Can we keep this snappy?

298. I've got gardening book club to get to, so, uh, opening statements?

299. - Thanks, Principal Lak— - Hi, everyone. I am O.

300. Vote for me,

301. and I promise that I will continue doin' what I have already been doin',

302. serving you all with openness and integrity.

303. - Thank you. - Thank you. Um... Ahem.

304. Well, I am Otis Milburn, and you should vote for me

305. because I came up with this original idea to set up a therapy clinic on campus.

306. It's because I believe all students

307. should have access to unbiased information and counseling on sex and their bodies.

308. Oh, I suppose I'd better ask a question.

309. I've got a question for Otis.

310. Who is this man?

311. - That's my dad. And— - Correct.

312. - This is Otis's father, Remi Milburn. - Oh my God.

313. Now, his writing is quite popular amongst certain men's rights groups.

314. And, if you don't mind, I'd like to read you

315. an extract from his latest book.

316. - Is this allowed? - It is.

317. - Here we are. - Yeah, it's fine.

318. "In order to attract a woman,

319. - the modern man finds himself..." - It's fine.

320. "... unable to assert his natural authority."

321. - I don't see how this is relevant— - Thank you, Otis.

322. If you don't mind, I'd like to finish. Thank you.

323. "Forced into a submissive role,

324. which not only emasculates him,

325. but creates a society disinterested in harmony."

326. Wow. Thank you, Remi Milburn.

327. Otis Milburn,

328. would you agree that men have a natural authority over women?

329. No. Of course I don't.

330. Look, my dad just writes that stuff to sell books.

331. I'm not him, and I don't agree with anything he says.

332. - That's interesting. - Is it?

333. It is. Because I would argue that the way you have behaved,

334. particularly towards me, has been pretty sexist.

335. That is ridiculous.

336. And I think it's inappropriate that you're even bringing my family into this.

337. I disagree. People need to know

338. what kind of person they're getting advice from.

339. I agree with that.

340. - So, O, I have a question for you. - No, I'm not ready to move on.

341. - I have a few more points to make. - I thought this was a debate.

342. Please continue, Otis.

343. Thank you, sir.

344. O, what advice would you give to someone who's recently been ghosted?

345. Well, I would need a little bit more information than that, Otis.

346. Sure.

347. PK, it's true, isn't it, that O ghosted you last term?

348. Yeah. Yeah, that's true.

349. And you're not the only one who's been strung along and tossed aside.

350. - There are others. - You did it to me too.

351. I tried to talk to you about it, but you ignored me.

352. - Well, I— - I felt like shit.

353. - You stamped on my heart.

354. - I—

355. - Can someone go and check on her?

356. He's so right!

357. I'm not sure I would want to be counseled

358. by someone who clearly cares so little about people's feelings.

359. Hmm.

360. Uh, we... Um...

361. Okay... um...

362. Um...

363. I deserve to be called out on my past behavior.

364. I have withdrawn from several relationships

365. without proper communication, and that is not something that I condone.

366. I think that leaving people without closure just isn't right.

367. And I am an absolute arsehole for doin' that, and I am owning that.

368. However, this hasn't just happened in a vacuum.

369. I have actually been on my own personal journey recently.

370. And... well, it's not something that I was going to talk about

371. until I felt ready to,

372. but I guess you have kind of forced my hand there, Otis.

373. Um...

374. So... uh...

375. Um...

376. Oh God! Um...

377. I am asexual.

378. And I really enjoyed the friendships of the people that I ghosted. I really did.

379. But when it started to move into somethin' more intimate,

380. I... I felt really overwhelmed and uncomfortable.

381. I didn't know how to deal with the feelings.

382. I didn't have the words to articulate that.

383. So I did the cowardly thing, and I just ran away,

384. and that is something that I really regret.

385. But unlike some people, I can accept criticism when it is valid.

386. And I really hope you all believe me

387. when I say that I am working hard on doing better.

388. I am working on accepting myself and... and feeling proud of my identity.

389. Thank you.

390. That was bad, man.

391. What just happened?

392. Well, I think she's won, and you've been canceled.

393. Yeah.

394. - Come in. - Sorry. I had to bring Joy again.

395. No worries. Would you like a cuppa?

396. Oh no. I did not wet myself. Ice pack.

397. I rubbed some of my son's home-brewed chili oil on my vulva.

398. - Oh. - I might have burned my clitoris.

399. - Oh boy. - I figured you're a therapist.

400. - Don't mind me sharing personal stuff? - No problem.

401. - Tea. - Yes.

402. - Thanks. - Great.

403. - I'll wash my hands. - Good.

404. There you go.

405. - Is that the, uh... chili sauce?

406. Ha ha! You're funny.

407. Yeah, peri-peri for the peri-perimenopause.

408. Oh.

409. How long have you been perimenopausal?

410. Oh, couple of years, I guess. I haven't had an official diagnosis.

411. It's just the hot flashes

412. and desert-like vagina are a bit of a giveaway.

413. Well, you know, you don't have to suffer.

414. There are plenty of treatments on offer if you call your GP.

415. I'm very busy. I work a lot. I'm a workaholic.

416. That's what my ex-wife reckons, but mostly I'm in here just playing with dinosaurs.

417. But I think I'm fine.

418. Yeah, it's not like I'm sick, you know.

419. Just uncomfortable.

420. Especially today.

421. So, you otherwise feel good in yourself? No mood changes?

422. What the fuck do you mean by that?

423. - Oh. Well, some— - Oh. That is a joke. I'm sorry.

424. - Too soon. - Fine.

425. I mean, my sons keep telling me I'm a bit more emotional than normal, but...

426. Sometimes our loved ones can see us much more clearly than we see ourselves.

427. Honestly...

428. I think I'm embarrassed.

429. You know, so many women don't seek help,

430. but it's because the subject of...

431. yeah, menopause is still so... stigmatized in society.

432. It's fucking ridiculous.

433. But even if you don't go for any of the treatments,

434. I think even just calling might help you feel more empowered,

435. and there is no reason to feel shame.

436. - Yeah? - Yeah.

437. There's the Jean I hired.

438. Hello again! Like, more of that on air.

439. Yes, well, I... I did feel better after the last show, I have to say.

440. - Yeah, about that. - Mmm.

441. Listen, Terry wants me to hire O on as your permanent cohost.

442. He thinks the idea of having two sex therapists,

443. you know, one young and one old-er,

444. is the hook that we've been looking for.

445. How do you feel about that?

446. Do I have a choice?

447. Yeah.

448. Nah. No.

449. Right.

450. I love my sister, I really do, but she is so tightly wound.

451. She's been like that since she was a kid.

452. She has to control everything in her life, and she doesn't know how to have any fun.

453. My husband Greg's exactly the same.

454. He's such a downer. I'll be eating dinner with him and thinking,

455. "Christ, Greg, you're depressing."

456. "Everything you do makes me sad, even the way you eat chicken."

457. - Ow! Fuck! Shit!

458. Remember that I'm not Greg!

459. Sorry, love, but brace yourself. There's more where that came from.

460. - Ah! - Oh! What the fuck?

461. Don't itch it.

462. Um... Oh, sorry, it's been declined. Have you got another card?

463. No.

464. Um...

465. Just give me a second.

466. Oh...

467. Hi.

468. Turtle, hi.

469. My, um... my card has been declined.

470. I think they put a block on it. Could you pay for a wax over the phone?

471. - Didn't they block it the other day? - Yeah, I'll pay you back.

472. Okay. Can you just speak to the lady? Thank you. She's gonna...

473. Hello. Yeah, well, full bush, front and back.

474. You all right, mate?

475. Just gettin' to know each other a bit, aren't we? Yeah?

476. Sorry. I, uh... I was cleaning, and...

477. I wasn't... Yeah.

478. So, how come you left school?

479. Uh... just... I wasn't very good at it.

480. Yeah, me either. I'm dyslexic, so that didn't help.

481. I was lucky, my... my dad let me come and work here.

482. I think he realized there was no point pushing me.

483. I've seen your dad picking you up for driving lessons.

484. He must be supportive too?

485. Uh...

486. Not really. I've always been a bit of an embarrassment to him.

487. What do you mean?

488. Well, he was the headmaster at my school.

489. And I just couldn't get it. More I tried, the worse I got.

490. He used to yell at me a lot.

491. Sounds like a bully.

492. Yeah, it's... a little bit scary.

493. But now he seems to be trying to, I dunno...

494. trying to be a normal dad, I suppose, or something.

495. Can I show you something?

496. Okay, don't think it's weird, but, um... Yeah, put that down.

497. I think that horses can help heal anything.

498. - So, if you just trust me... - Yep.

499. Just relax. Put your hand on his belly.

500. - Then put a hand here. - Uh-huh.

501. Yeah, and, yep.

502. - Do the thing. - Okay.

503. Feel his heartbeat.

504. Feeling it?

505. Okay, tell me that... that doesn't make everything else feel... calm.

506. Feels a bit weird to be huggin' a horse, but...

507. yeah, it does.

508. Yeah, great...

509. - Oh shit. I've got a class to teach.

510. Okay, I'll see ya.

511. - You should come and shadow me.

512. - Hi, guys. - Hi, Jem.

513. - You ready to go? - Yes.

514. Oh, Michael, I feel awful. I feel like we're doing this behind Adam's back.

515. I think we should get back together.

516. We can't.

517. Adam would be devastated.

518. But... I've... changed.

519. Michael!

520. You've taken him on a few driving lessons.

521. It's gonna take time to earn his trust.

522. Okay.

523. No.

524. Okay. Here we go.

525. Oh. Hello, darling. You're back.

526. Yep. I'm goin' out.

527. Wh... where are you going? I... I haven't seen you in three days.

528. I'm going to see Maeve.

529. Why are you being cold?

530. Because, Mum, you decided to bring my main competition onto your radio show.

531. What? Who?

532. O? What? I didn't even know that you knew her.

533. I told you about the other therapist on campus. That's her.

534. Oh, wh—

535. And now she's walkin' around saying she's the star of Sexology.

536. Well, she sort of is the star of Sexology. They...

537. they've hired her as my cohost.

538. Wh... Otis, you can't just come and go as you please.

539. You're still living under my roof,

540. and I would like to continue this conversation, please.

541. - Why're you suddenly acting like a parent? - What?

542. You've paid zero notice of me since Joy arrived. Like, at all.

543. And I know it's been hard, and I know having a baby is a huge deal,

544. but you... you're treatin' me like an adult, and I still need a mum.

545. I'm gonna be late.

546. - Hello, surgery. - Yes, um...

547. I'd like to book back in to see Dr. Miller, please.

548. Come in.

549. - Hello. - Hi.

550. Ooh! Where are you going?

551. I'm going on a date with Otis. It's our first one.

552. - Oh, you look amazing.

553. - How was today? - Um...

554. Not great.

555. Yeah.

556. Kind of realized we don't have anyone to invite to the funeral.

557. I still want Mum to have a proper goodbye, so I need to figure it out.

558. Definitely.

559. Anyway, it's fine. How was your day?

560. Yeah, it was fine.

561. - Could you sit for two seconds? Sorry. - Yeah.

562. Um...

563. So, you know how you thought me and Isaac would get along?

564. Yeah.

565. Well, we've been doing art class together, and we've kind of become friends.

566. - I knew it. - Yeah.

567. Um...

568. - This is really hard to say. - What? Aimes?

569. I think we might like each other more than that.

570. Sorry.

571. What?

572. - So— - Wait. Why are you laughing?

573. Oh... I'm not. I was—

574. - It's been a weird day. - I'm so sorry.

575. I wasn't expecting you to say that.

576. Sorry, do you actually like Isaac now?

577. Yeah. I mean, he's grumpy.

578. - He's a bit rude. But he gets me. - Yeah.

579. Hanging out with him has made me realize that I'm actually quite smart.

580. Aimes, you are smart.

581. - I thought you wanted to be single. - I know.

582. It's shit. I'm a shit person, and I'm a shit friend.

583. - You're not shit. Aimee, you're not shit. - No, I am.

584. How do you feel about it?

585. Um... I can't really deal with this now. I'm sorry.

586. - Absolutely. I'm gonna go. - We can talk another time.

587. Of course. Complete wrong moment.

588. - Um... - I'm really sorry.

589. It's okay. I... I'll see you.

590. - Enjoy your date. - Thanks.

591. - I love you. - Love you.

592. - Don't tell me. - I'm far too busy for that.

593. - More than you though. - Yes. Busted.

594. How was school?

595. - Yeah, fine. - Hmm.

596. I'm gonna say something, and I need you both to not get defensive.

597. - Okay? - Hmm.

598. I wanna find out who my sperm donor is.

599. Wh... why now?

600. - Ahem. - Well, I've always had questions.

601. Right, well, um... What kind of questions?

602. Lots of things. Like, who am I?

603. Well, you know who you are, Jackson.

604. - I said don't get defensive. - Right.

605. - What else? - Like, does cancer run in their family?

606. And their heritage.

607. I'm so anxious, yeah? And I feel like I was born with it.

608. - And it didn't come from either of you. - Well, your mum and I will think about it.

609. - Uh... - What?

610. I don't think it's your decision, Mum.

611. You have a lot going on,

612. and you've got to get your test results back from the doctor.

613. - Exactly. - And your A-levels are coming up, so...

614. This is not the time.

615. I knew there was no point talking to you about this.

616. Hey!

617. I said this would eventually happen.

618. I am not...

619. ready.

620. - Um...

621. - Yeah. - Uh...

622. What can I get you?

623. Can I get that bag of sweets there? Top left, the white one.

624. Sure.

625. - The white one. - Here you go.

626. Thank you. Can I just tap that?

627. Eric, it's good to see you again.

628. Uh...

629. My college is doing their annual fundraiser,

630. and I was wondering whether I could donate the money to the soup kitchen.

631. I enjoyed workin' there the other night and bein' a part of the community.

632. And I just think it would be sad if it didn't continue.

633. That is... very kind.

634. Thank you.

635. Uh... Great!

636. Great.

637. I will tell my friends. Thank you, Pastor Samuel.

638. You haven't been coming to baptism classes.

639. Yeah...

640. Um...

641. I'm not sure

642. I want to be baptized anymore.

643. Oh.

644. I understand. But you are welcome to come back at any time.

645. I'll think about it.

646. - Hello.

647. - Hi. - Hi. Uh...

648. I didn't know you were part of church choir.

649. Yeah. Um, you should stay and listen. We've been workin' on a new song, so...

650. - I'm gonna get warmed up. - Okay.

651. See you in a bit. Stay.

652. Mmm... mmm.

653. - Hi. - Hi.

654. - Wow. - Ta-da!

655. I got you flowers. Um... I didn't really know if this was too much.

656. - Maybe it is, but I kept changing my mind. - Thanks.

657. Are you okay?

658. 'Cause I've had a really terrible day, and I really want us to have some fun.

659. - Shall we go in? - Yeah.

660. Uh, no, I printed them out, actually.

661. Jo! Hey.

662. - Hi. - Are you seeing something tonight?

663. Yeah, um... I was supposed to be, but I was stood up. Yeah.

664. Apparently, he has had a motorbike accident.

665. Oh.

666. - Bet he says that to everyone. - This is Maeve.

667. - Uh... This is my Auntie Jo. - Hi.

668. - Hello. - Hi, Jo.

669. Oh my God, she is a goddess.

670. - Look at her. You two are adorable.

671. - Okay, stop.

672. - Okay, um... we should get the tickets. - Yeah.

673. - Yeah. - It's gonna start.

674. - But I'll see you. - Nice to meet you.

675. Could you, um... shout me a ticket?

676. - Yeah. Yeah. That's fine.

677. - You don't mind, do you? - No.

678. Hey.

679. Hey.

680. I know you don't wanna be friends anymore, but you don't need to be a dick about it.

681. - What? - It's okay. I won't bother you anymore.

682. - Wait, Cal. - No.

683. Sorry, I'm late. Shall we go get popcorn?

684. - Um, yeah. Yeah. - Okay.

685. - Hey!

686. - Viv. - Hey.

687. Hey, sorry.

688. Had a big fight with my parents. I didn't know where else to go.

689. Come watch the film with us.

690. That's fine, right, Beau?

691. - Yeah. I'll get another ticket. - Cool. Thanks, man.

692. I can't believe that that twat stood me up.

693. I mean, he told me he wanted to get married and have kids.

694. Talk about red fucking flag.

695. - Where are we? - Hi. Um...

696. - These ones. - Mmm.

697. - But if... Uh, we were...

698. It's humiliating.

699. Do you want a drink?

700. Yes, I want a drink.

701. - Tequila? Yes, my friend. - Mmm.

702. I really like her.

703. Mmm.

704. Ah! Oh, that's strong.

705. - Here we are. - What a fucking pig.

706. So, what happened, then?

707. So I told them, and they freaked out.

708. All right, lads?

709. They said, yeah, I'm not allowed to look for him.

710. But I'm 18 now, so they can't stop me.

711. Do you think it's a good idea to go behind your parents' backs?

712. - What's behind their back? - Oh, nothing.

713. - Thanks.

714. Film's starting.

715. Is this a fucking black-and-white film?

716. "You pay the balance at once," he says, "or I'll hand you over to the police."

717. - You ought to have seen the chap's face. - So sad. Oh my God.

718. Changed his tune...

719. Oh shit. They haven't turned the subtitles on.

720. - I can go ask. - Oh, no, no, no.

721. - You don't have to do that. Let's watch. - You can't expect much spirit from a man

722. - with only one lung... - Cheers, everyone!

723. I thought something must be wrong when you didn't come.

724. I'd have popped in to explain, but I had a date.

725. - Oh, good morning. - How's the eye?

726. - "How's the eye"? - "Very fine, actually. Thanks for asking."

727. - "Feels like it's clearing up." - "Yes, looks very good."

728. - And I to the grocer's. - What exciting lives...

729. - "An exciting life we lead." - I'm gonna go.

730. I'd been to the Palladium, as usual, but it was a terribly long film.

731. - I was afraid I'd be late. - Okay, I'm gonna see if he's okay.

732. - As I came up onto the platform... - All men are arseholes.

733. - I mean, not you, Otis.

734. You're actually quite sweet,

735. but most men are big, fucking, gaping, prolapsed arseholes.

736. - Sh!

737. You, sh!

738. - Look... - Sh...

739. Relax, Otis. Have some tequila.

740. Beau. Beau! Wait. What's wrong?

741. Why is he talking to you about this private stuff?

742. And... and crashing our date. He's obviously into you, Viv.

743. I've told you it's not like that. We're just mates.

744. Okay. If you say so.

745. But I don't think you know how great you are.

746. And we've got mock exams comin' up, so don't let him distract you, all right?

747. Yeah.

748. I'm sorry I got upset. I just...

749. I... I think I'm falling for you.

750. - You don't have to say anything. - I think I'm falling for you too.

751. Bitch!

752. - Sh.

753. Hey, Maeve, give me another sip.

754. Give me another sip.

755. Just one more.

756. Sorry. I'm sorry.

757. Please stop throwing popcorn.

758. - They'll kick us out. - Sorry. Okay, I won't.

759. - I'm going to get the usher. - Okay.

760. Good. Can you tell him to change the film as well?

761. 'Cause this one is slow.

762. - Tell you what a good film is. - Jo, please...

763. - What's that one with Lady Gaga? - Just be quiet.

764. - They're gonna kick us out. - And that guy, and he pisses himself.

765. And he's really sad.

766. Now that's a good... That is a good film.

767. Excuse me, madam.

768. - Oh! - You need to leave.

769. - I'm... - We're going. Stand up. Stand up!

770. - I am standing up! - Just take this.

771. Ooh!

772. - I'm sorry. - I am so sorry.

773. - I might be a bit sick. - Maeve, please help.

774. - I'll be sick if I don't eat... - Just wait till you're...

775. - You're so lovely. - ... home. Oh, Jo...

776. - Oh, thank you. - I like you so much.

777. - In the car. Hey, mate. You okay? - Don't be sick on the seat.

778. Belt on. There's your bag.

779. Hey, mate. You know where you're going? Just up the hill. Here's 20.

780. - All right, mate. - Okay. Cheers.

781. - Maeve! - Bye.

782. Where you going? We've got a table booked for dinner.

783. - We can do it another day. Come on. - But...

784. Oh, yeah...

785. - Aww! - There she is.

786. You're not gonna get in.

787. Ahem.

788. Uh...

789. Uh, really?

790. Yeah, why?

791. You scared?

792. Follow me.

793. Okay. Oop!

794. Ooh!

795. So many fucking steps. Oh God!

796. Fucking bush.

797. I'll fucking take you up.

798. Sh... Okay.

799. Okay... We're down now.

800. Oh fuck. Oh my God. Jesus.

801. - Fucking gibberish.

802. Jean.

803. Jean, I...

804. Are you drunk?

805. I know that you're upset about the doctor's,

806. but you're the best sister I've ever had.

807. I'm your only sister.

808. You're so kind to me.

809. You're such a... a kind, kind woman, and I'm a mess.

810. - Mm-hmm. - No wonder no one loves me.

811. - Well, I love you, Jo. - I know you do.

812. And that's why you're gonna be so angry when I tell you about the debt.

813. What debt?

814. I owe a lot of money.

815. How much is a lot?

816. A lot. A lot.

817. - Can I ask you a silly question? - Yes.

818. Why did you stop me when I was gonna ask them about the captions?

819. Oh, I don't like making a fuss.

820. Why not?

821. What do you mean?

822. I mean, if it would have made your experience better,

823. I feel you should have asked.

824. If I make it a thing every time something like that happens,

825. I will spend my life having awkward arguments

826. with non-disabled people.

827. I feel that.

828. I'm like that sometimes with my mom. She doesn't understand my identity.

829. I love her, but I get tired of explaining everything to her all the time,

830. so I've just kind of stopped talking altogether.

831. But you have a right to ask for things when you need them.

832. Hmm.

833. It's a shame it's cloudy because I would love to show you the stars.

834. What?

835. Are you seriously trying to talk about stars?

836. It's my signature move. Thank you very much.

837. You could also kiss me.

838. - Oh my God. - What?

839. - Sh.

840. - Shut up!

841. Come on.

842. Ta-da!

843. - Ah!

844. - Ooh! - Oh!

845. Okay!

846. - Come on. - We definitely shouldn't be here.

847. - Hey. - Hey.

848. We should have sex.

849. Well, you've just had a bit to drink.

850. - I don't know... - I'm fine. I'm not drunk.

851. - Yes, you are. - I wanna have sex with you.

852. - Take your jacket off. - Yeah.

853. - Okay. This feels a bit weird. - Why? It's fine.

854. - Stop worrying about everything. - Okay.

855. Sorry, I can't. Stop.

856. Sorry. Um... I spent the night with Ruby.

857. I just... Uh, I had to tell you.

858. It's when you were in America. We were fighting, and...

859. And we just... We slept together. No, as in, we didn't have sex.

860. Like, nothing happened. We just... We just stayed in the same bed. Sorry.

861. Fuck.

862. Mmm.

863. Hmm.

864. Maeve?

865. Well, fuck you.

866. - Did you hear that?

867. - Yeah, it's usually... - Shit. Someone's here.

868. There's someone down there. Go, go, go.

869. My jacket. I can't get arrested.

870. - Oi! - I'm too young.

871. What do you think you're doin'?

872. - Fuck! - Oh, my neck.

873. Stop playin' around.

874. Out!

875. Mum, this is Maeve.

876. Hello, Maeve.