1. Whoo!Copy !req
2. Whoo!Copy !req
3. That was so great!Copy !req
4. It was okay.Copy !req
5. I didn't come though.Copy !req
6. But you do usually come, though, right?Copy !req
7. Yeah. I mean, with other guys.Copy !req
8. But not with me?Copy !req
9. Well, this is quite a surprise.Copy !req
10. Who gave you these orgasms, then?Copy !req
11. Tom Baker, Joe Fuchart, Ryan Bailey—Copy !req
12. Okay, I get it. I get it.Copy !req
13. - What did they do different?
- I don't know. Maybe do some research.Copy !req
14. Am I bad at sex?Copy !req
15. Hello?
Good morning, darling!Copy !req
16. - Wanted to make sure you didn't sleep in.
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
17. - You had breakfast yet?
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
18. Can I please have more
than a one-grunt answer?Copy !req
19. Have you told Jakob yet?Copy !req
20. I'm about to be on-air, sweetheart,
so I'll… We'll talk about that later.Copy !req
21. [DJ] We have Dr. Jean Milburn here
to talk about her new book,Copy !req
22. Uneducated Nation -
A Sex Education Manifesto for Our Youth.Copy !req
23. She wrote this as a response to
working on campus at Moordale Secondary,Copy !req
24. which got some pretty bad press recently
following a chlamydia outbreak,Copy !req
25. and the performance
of a so-called "sex musical."Copy !req
26. So, Dr. Milburn, tell us about the book.Copy !req
27. Well, I was shocked at the ineptitude
of the SRE curriculums in schools.Copy !req
28. So I created this easy-to-read manual
to help empower our teenagers,Copy !req
29. and their parents, as they become
sexually active young adults.Copy !req
30. Sounds a bit racy.Copy !req
31. Well, if, by racy,
you mean highly researchedCopy !req
32. and completely essential to the health
and well-being of our children,Copy !req
33. then, yes, I suppose it is.Copy !req
34. [DJ] A lot of people
will be sitting at home thinking,Copy !req
35. "I wasn't taught this stuff, and I…"Copy !req
36. Thanks.Copy !req
37. "Is it really necessary?"Copy !req
38. Hopefully, if people read my book,
they'll understand how…Copy !req
39. They're not still going on
about "Sex School," are they?Copy !req
40. Mm. It's as if no one
in this town's had sex before.Copy !req
41. Okay, thanks for the tea, Joe!Copy !req
42. I better go.Copy !req
43. I don't wanna be late for my first day.Copy !req
44. If you're not gonna finish your tea,
at least take your lunch.Copy !req
45. Oh.Copy !req
46. It's a fancy sandwich. Cheese and ham.Copy !req
47. Wow.
- Mm.Copy !req
48. Hm. Thank you.
See you later. Have a nice day.Copy !req
49. - Bye.
Good luck!Copy !req
50. Enough of the yearning looks, you pillock.
Just tell her you like her already.Copy !req
51. - Hi!
Hi!Copy !req
52. Nice ride, Aimes.Copy !req
53. Thanks! Mum thinks I'm safer driving
than getting the bus, so here we are.Copy !req
54. Okay.Copy !req
55. Who's this?Copy !req
56. Maeve, that's Steve.Copy !req
57. No, Aimee, the goat.Copy !req
58. Oh! She's our commitment animal.Copy !req
59. Apparently,
pets bring couples closer together.Copy !req
60. We didn't think about who was gonna
look after her when we're at school, so…Copy !req
61. Sorry, love!Copy !req
62. - Aimes?
You okay?Copy !req
63. No!
- Yeah.Copy !req
64. Let's try that again, shall we?Copy !req
65. Oatcake, what's on your face?Copy !req
66. It's a mustache.
I've been growing it all summer,Copy !req
67. but somebody has been too busy having sex
with their new boyfriend to notice.Copy !req
68. Uh, I was hoping it was a phase.Copy !req
69. And Adam and I aren't having sex sex.Copy !req
70. We're just doing hand jobs and stuff.Copy !req
71. Hand jobs is sex.
Virginity is a construct.Copy !req
72. Yes! Yes, I know!Copy !req
73. But I really want to go all the way!Copy !req
74. What is it you want to say to me?Copy !req
75. I think you need to be careful.Copy !req
76. And I think you need
to make more of an effort with him.Copy !req
77. Okay. Okay, I will.Copy !req
78. Hey, I forgot to tell you.
I saw Maeve the other day.Copy !req
79. Why are you telling me about Maeve?Copy !req
80. - I thought you might wanna know?
- She hasn't responded to my message.Copy !req
81. She's made it abundantly clear
she doesn't want me in her life, so, no.Copy !req
82. I don't need to know
what Maeve is doing anymore.Copy !req
83. Well, I just—Copy !req
84. Oh my God!Copy !req
85. - The fuck is that?Copy !req
86. Adam, you fucking idiot!
Fuck!Copy !req
87. Whoo! Ha ha!Copy !req
88. All right, New Kid?Copy !req
89. What is that on your face?Copy !req
90. What's Adam Groff doing back?Copy !req
91. I heard his mum bribed the school
to let him back.Copy !req
92. And you know he's gay now, right?Copy !req
93. You okay?Copy !req
94. Yeah, I'm fine.Copy !req
95. Oatcake, you all right?Copy !req
96. I'm A-okay, Eric. I'm fine. I'm chillaxed!Copy !req
97. To the max!Copy !req
98. Okay then, Mr. Mustache.Copy !req
99. So you guys didn't speak much over summer?Copy !req
100. No. I haven't heard from him
since last term.Copy !req
101. - I always thought you two would make up.
- We're not fighting.Copy !req
102. We're just not friends anymore.Copy !req
103. Why's there a camera crew here?Copy !req
104. You've grown!Copy !req
105. Massive!Copy !req
106. Hey, hey, hey! Whoa, whoa, girls!
Why is there a goat on campus?Copy !req
107. She's mine and Steve's commitment animal.Copy !req
108. Right. You didn't think of a hamster?Copy !req
109. Or, um, a terrapin?Copy !req
110. Or a worm farm?Copy !req
111. How's Eugene?Copy !req
112. I mean, long-distance is hard,Copy !req
113. but I think if we play our cards right,
we'll both end up at Oxford.Copy !req
114. Did I tell you he speaks six languages?Copy !req
115. Yes.Copy !req
116. Here are some of the students
currently attending what has been dubbedCopy !req
117. the "Sex School."Copy !req
118. Oh, excuse me, young man,
what can you tell usCopy !req
119. about last year's chlamydia outbreak
on campus?Copy !req
120. Please speak.Copy !req
121. We're live.Copy !req
122. Uh, hi. Hi.Copy !req
123. I'm Eric Effiong.Copy !req
124. And all I can say about the outbreak was
that it was absolutely terrifying.Copy !req
125. We were scared for our lives.Copy !req
126. Do you have an opinion, young man?Copy !req
127. Yes.Copy !req
128. Firstly, it was mass hysteria,Copy !req
129. not a chlamydia outbreak.
Your facts are wrong.Copy !req
130. - Otis, shh! We're on TV.
Yeah, shut up, Milburn!Copy !req
131. - Are you Dr. Jean Milburn's son?
- Yes. Yes, he is that.Copy !req
132. Are the students of Moordale as depraved
as your mother makes out in her new book?Copy !req
133. I think my mum's book is
an honest insight into teenagers today,Copy !req
134. and people should probably read it
before speculating.Copy !req
135. You should probably read it.Copy !req
136. Probably.Copy !req
137. It's true. I do love an empty school.Copy !req
138. - But it's nice to see the students.
- Priceless.Copy !req
139. I used to teach geography
before I became a headmaster.Copy !req
140. I'm also very experienced
in teaching history and—Copy !req
141. Thanks for coming in, Mr. Groff.
We will consider your application.Copy !req
142. Are you actually going to consider
my application?Copy !req
143. No.Copy !req
144. I'm sorry. The controversy surrounding
Moordale Secondary is too fresh.Copy !req
145. You're also far too experienced
for this role.Copy !req
146. This is the fifth teaching position
that I've applied for,Copy !req
147. and frankly, I'm running out of options.Copy !req
148. It's still a no.Copy !req
149. Good morning, Moordale!Copy !req
150. How is everyone feeling today?Copy !req
151. Really good!Copy !req
152. I am your new head teacher, Mrs. Haddon,Copy !req
153. but you can call me Hope.Copy !req
154. She's cool.
Teachers aren't supposed to be cool.Copy !req
155. The first thing you need to know about meCopy !req
156. is that I used to be sitting
where you are now.Copy !req
157. Literally.Copy !req
158. Yeah, I went to Moordale too.Copy !req
159. - I love her lipstick. It's so bold.
- Mm.Copy !req
160. I've achieved a lot since then.Copy !req
161. Two degrees, teaching positions
at some of the country's top institutions,Copy !req
162. and by 28, I became
the youngest head teacher in the UK.Copy !req
163. But the years I spent in this building
were the best of my life.Copy !req
164. This school not only encouraged me
to excel academically,Copy !req
165. but it truly allowed me
to find my purpose.Copy !req
166. Which is why it's been so hurtful
to read some of the horrible thingsCopy !req
167. written about Moordale in the press.Copy !req
168. I don't know what went wrongCopy !req
169. or how we ended up here,Copy !req
170. but I do knowCopy !req
171. it changes today.Copy !req
172. I can promise you this.Copy !req
173. If you work hard
and you take pride in your school,Copy !req
174. I will get Moordale and your futuresCopy !req
175. back on track.Copy !req
176. Yeah!
- Oh!Copy !req
177. - Wow!
- Come on, girl!Copy !req
178. So let me hear you.Copy !req
179. Let's get Moordale…Copy !req
180. Back on track!Copy !req
181. Let's get Moordale…Copy !req
182. - I love her.
Back on track!Copy !req
183. She's like Joan of Arc, but cooler.Copy !req
184. - Back on track!
- Yes!Copy !req
185. - Wow!Copy !req
186. Thank you all!
- Come on.Copy !req
187. To a great start and a great week. And oh!Copy !req
188. Can Otis Milburn
and Maeve Wiley come to my office, please?Copy !req
189. You get to meet her in the flesh.Copy !req
190. Maeve!Copy !req
191. Hi, Jakob!Copy !req
192. You're looking well.Copy !req
193. Oh, this?Copy !req
194. Funny story.Copy !req
195. You impregnated me.Copy !req
196. Surprise!Copy !req
197. Oh shit.Copy !req
198. Damn it! Shit, shit, shit!Copy !req
199. How come you're back in school?Copy !req
200. I wanna learn some shit, don't I?Copy !req
201. You must be Jackson Marchetti,
famed head boy.Copy !req
202. That would be me.Copy !req
203. Of course. Of course.Copy !req
204. Acting, swimming extraordinaire.Copy !req
205. I'm re-enrolling.
I think I need to take some kind of test.Copy !req
206. Ah, yes, Mr. Groff's son.Copy !req
207. My receptionist has your paperwork.Copy !req
208. Hi, guys. You can go straight in.Copy !req
209. Jackson,
can I get you to come back a bit later?Copy !req
210. It was really lovely to meet you.Copy !req
211. I've heard
a lot about the two of you.Copy !req
212. Sit down.Copy !req
213. Don't worry. You're not in any trouble.Copy !req
214. An on-campus sex clinic for teenagers is
rather entrepreneurial, in my opinion.Copy !req
215. Shows a lot of business savvy.Copy !req
216. Is it something you're wanting to pursue?Copy !req
217. N… no.Copy !req
218. No. We don't run the clinic anymore.Copy !req
219. We've realized
it wasn't very ethical, and we—Copy !req
220. We sort of stopped being friends.
We grew apart.Copy !req
221. Oh. That's a shame.Copy !req
222. Anyway, I just wanted to say that Moordale
is here to encourage your passions.Copy !req
223. It would be great
if you could keep me in the loopCopy !req
224. of any further business endeavors
you come up with in the future.Copy !req
225. That's it.Copy !req
226. Okay.Copy !req
227. Thank you.Copy !req
228. Oh, Otis…Copy !req
229. tell your mum I'm really looking forward
to reading her book.Copy !req
230. I will… Yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
231. - I thought we were screwed.
Me too.Copy !req
232. - Shit. Well, thank God.
- Yeah.Copy !req
233. So why aren't we friends anymore?Copy !req
234. Nice beard.Copy !req
235. What's your point?Copy !req
236. Nothing.Copy !req
237. We're just in different places.Copy !req
238. If that's what you wanna call it.Copy !req
239. Bye, Otis.Copy !req
240. Maeve?Copy !req
241. Yeah?Copy !req
242. It's called a mustache.Copy !req
243. Yeah, no shit.Copy !req
244. - Wait. Did anyone see you coming in?
- No, I was careful.Copy !req
245. Okay.Copy !req
246. Careful there. Careful there.Copy !req
247. Okay.Copy !req
248. Oh, your aftershave is so cheap.
It turns me on.Copy !req
249. Hi, I'm looking for Sex King?Copy !req
250. What is the problem, young man?Copy !req
251. Um, my girlfriend told me
she's never come having sex with me,Copy !req
252. but she did used to with other guys.Copy !req
253. What are your measurements?
- What do you mean?Copy !req
254. Women need a large penis
in order to come.Copy !req
255. A smaller penis could be okay
with the right amount of girth,Copy !req
256. but a small dick and no girth
will never please a woman.Copy !req
257. I've, uh, never measured.Copy !req
258. Come back to me when you do.Copy !req
259. I'll need measurements
for width, length, erect, and flaccid.Copy !req
260. That'll be 30 pounds, please.Copy !req
261. - But you haven't helped.
Half now, half later?Copy !req
262. Kyle?Copy !req
263. Milburn! It's only you.Copy !req
264. Thought it was the fuzz again.
I'm the Sex King now!Copy !req
265. You are no such thing!Copy !req
266. - You left a gap in the market.Copy !req
267. - "Pubes are overrated"?
- Yeah.Copy !req
268. "To win the race, come on the face"?Copy !req
269. Big-time.Copy !req
270. Are you just getting
all your advice from porn?Copy !req
271. Look, no offense, mate,
but I've had a lot more sex than you.Copy !req
272. Well, I'm going to have to report you
because this is dangerous and it's wrong.Copy !req
273. Shoot!Copy !req
274. What are you doing in here, anyway?Copy !req
275. Nothing.Copy !req
276. Kyle.Copy !req
277. Ruby! What are you doing here?Copy !req
278. Well, well, well.Copy !req
279. Ruby Matthews
is secretly shagging Otis Milburn.Copy !req
280. - Kyle…
- People are gonna love this!Copy !req
281. Kyle, wait!
Please don't tell anyone about this.Copy !req
282. Then you can't tell anyone
about me being the Sex King.Copy !req
283. Unless you want everyone to know
about your secret sex affair.Copy !req
284. Laters, losers.Copy !req
285. Well done.Copy !req
286. Ruby! Ruby! Ruby, wait!Copy !req
287. I… I have to tell somebody.
He could hurt people!Copy !req
288. Otis,Copy !req
289. do you like having sex with me?Copy !req
290. Mm.Copy !req
291. Do you like it when I touch you?Copy !req
292. Would you like it if I were
to suddenly stop touching you forever?Copy !req
293. No.Copy !req
294. - Then you will keep your mouth shut.
- Mm.Copy !req
295. Remember,
five feet behind me at all times.Copy !req
296. Someone else is giving out sex advice
on campus.Copy !req
297. Who?Copy !req
298. I can't say.Copy !req
299. What do you mean, "You can't say"?
We tell each other everything!Copy !req
300. You know it stays between me and you.Copy !req
301. Okay. Okay, fine.Copy !req
302. - It's Kyle.
- Hmm?Copy !req
303. He's charging people for advice
and calling himself the Sex King.Copy !req
304. Look at my big tits!Copy !req
305. - I mean, we have to tell someone.
We can't.Copy !req
306. Why not?Copy !req
307. BecauseCopy !req
308. if I do, he's gonna tell people
I'm hooking up with Ruby.Copy !req
309. Sorry, what?Copy !req
310. Look, I haven't told you,Copy !req
311. but we've been having casual sex
all over summer.Copy !req
312. She wants it to be a secret,
and we haven't seen each other that much.Copy !req
313. Are you kidding?Copy !req
314. Hey, what's that on your neck?Copy !req
315. Oh my God!Copy !req
316. What? How? When?Copy !req
317. Okay, okay, okay.Copy !req
318. So, it was Olivia's party.Copy !req
319. You were supposed to come
but decided to watch movies with Adam.Copy !req
320. Anyway, I was there on my own.Copy !req
321. At first, Ruby ignored me.Copy !req
322. But then…Copy !req
323. - Milburn!
- Oh!Copy !req
324. Oh. Hi, Ruby, what are you?Copy !req
325. I'm early 2000s Christina Aguilera.Copy !req
326. Very cool. I'm macaroni cheese.Copy !req
327. - Shut up and have sex with me.
- What are you sad about tonight?Copy !req
328. I'm a teenage girl, Otis. I'm always sad.Copy !req
329. Wait. Why were you macaroni cheese?Copy !req
330. That's not the point, Eric!Copy !req
331. - Sorry.
- I'm sorry I didn't tell you before.Copy !req
332. I think I'm still figuring it out myself.Copy !req
333. You're having casual sex
with the most popular girl in school?Copy !req
334. I know!Copy !req
335. - I'm so proud of you!
- It's amazing.Copy !req
336. - I'm so proud of you!
- And there's no strings.Copy !req
337. - So nobody gets hurt.
- Mm.Copy !req
338. Wahey! Whoa!Copy !req
339. What you gonna do about Kyle?Copy !req
340. I guess
it's not my responsibility anymore?Copy !req
341. Ow! Oh!Copy !req
342. Groff loves penis!Copy !req
343. How did the test go?Copy !req
344. It does look bad.Copy !req
345. You got a problem?Copy !req
346. No, Adam. Sorry, Adam.Copy !req
347. What are you doing?Copy !req
348. They… they were talking about me.Copy !req
349. But that doesn't mean
you can hurt people, Adam.Copy !req
350. No, I… I can't do this again.Copy !req
351. What are you all looking at?Copy !req
352. Hey, hey, little bro!Copy !req
353. How was the, uh, job interview?Copy !req
354. Did you smash it?Copy !req
355. Yeah, yes, it was great.
Um, I start tomorrow.Copy !req
356. Thank fuck!Copy !req
357. Hey, tell me something.Copy !req
358. What's an average teacher's salary
these days?Copy !req
359. You know, ballpark. We were talking
at work, and we haven't got a clue.Copy !req
360. - Well, it starts—
- Mm.Copy !req
361. Taste that. Go on, it's a protein shake.Copy !req
362. - How fucking good is that?Copy !req
363. - Come on! Eh?Copy !req
364. Oh shit. You remember James McBride?
He's only gone and bought a yacht.Copy !req
365. Now the wife's dropping fucking hints.Copy !req
366. Know what the secret
to a happy marriage is?Copy !req
367. I'm not really the best person
to answer that, Peter.Copy !req
368. Money. Well, that and keeping
the toilet seat down, butCopy !req
369. mostly fucking money…Copy !req
370. I'm so wired after court today!
I fucking destroyed the defendant.Copy !req
371. I mean, I just like…
…dismembered them.Copy !req
372. Come on. Quick game of squash, Chub-Chub?Copy !req
373. Oink, oink.Copy !req
374. Nice day at school?Copy !req
375. Yeah, it was all right.
Your book is causing quite the stir.Copy !req
376. - Press there and everything.
- Really?Copy !req
377. - It's not that controversial.
- I know.Copy !req
378. Mm. Wanna watch a movie tonight?Copy !req
379. How about When Harry Met Sally…?Copy !req
380. - Or…Copy !req
381. …How to Lose A Guy in 10 Days?Copy !req
382. You choose.Copy !req
383. I'm going out.Copy !req
384. Where?Copy !req
385. I have homework with Eric.Copy !req
386. - I'll be home later.
- Right.Copy !req
387. Oh, Otis.Copy !req
388. I've got a scan tomorrow.
Will you come with me?Copy !req
389. Please?Copy !req
390. Sure.Copy !req
391. But you have to tell him, Mum.Copy !req
392. I will.Copy !req
393. Go away, Mum.Copy !req
394. You're not wanking, are you?Copy !req
395. Are you okay?Copy !req
396. Do you wanna go and smash some shit?Copy !req
397. Or we could talk instead?Copy !req
398. I'm… I'm not good at talking.Copy !req
399. When my mum died,
I was angry all the time.Copy !req
400. My counselor told me
to take my anger out on a pillow,Copy !req
401. so I punched my pillow
every night for months.Copy !req
402. But in the end, it turned out that
talking was the only thing that helped.Copy !req
403. What happened today?Copy !req
404. I… I don't want people
to think I'm a pussy.Copy !req
405. - 'Cause you're dating a guy?
- I'm still a man.Copy !req
406. Yeah. Of course you're still a man.Copy !req
407. But you know,
men don't need to hit things,Copy !req
408. and men can date other men.Copy !req
409. - You need to tell Eric how you feel.
- I don't…Copy !req
410. I don't know how.Copy !req
411. Well, I think you should try.Copy !req
412. Ya pussy!Copy !req
413. Can we do the punching pillow thing first?Copy !req
414. Absolutely. Bring it here.Copy !req
415. So what you have do is
just take a deep breath in.Copy !req
416. - Mm-hmm.
- Get yourself all pumped up.Copy !req
417. Ah!Copy !req
418. - Get it.Copy !req
419. That's a good effort, Michaela!Copy !req
420. Quick shower, then, uh, Quorn Bolognese.Copy !req
421. Fucking love Quorn!Copy !req
422. Oh God.Copy !req
423. I said, don't wear your jacket!
People might recognize you!Copy !req
424. It's cold, and we're in the woods.
I'm sure it will be fine.Copy !req
425. And the jeans…Copy !req
426. Mmm.Copy !req
427. Thank you.Copy !req
428. Yes.Copy !req
429. - Hello!Copy !req
430. - Shh.Copy !req
431. - [Otis grunts, groans]
- Okay.Copy !req
432. Oh! Ow!Copy !req
433. Ow, ow, ow!Copy !req
434. - Stop.
- Careful of my hair.Copy !req
435. Okay, this isn't working.
Can't we go to your house? Or mine?Copy !req
436. Houses are off-limits. It's too risky.Copy !req
437. I get that you want us to be a secret,Copy !req
438. but it feels like you're embarrassed
to even be seen near me.Copy !req
439. I'm a very private person, Otis.Copy !req
440. I think you're embarrassed.Copy !req
441. Okay, fine. I'm embarrassed!Copy !req
442. I am hot and popular,Copy !req
443. and you are a badly-dressed stick man
with a creepy mustache.Copy !req
444. You said you liked my mustache.Copy !req
445. And I was good at sex.Copy !req
446. You are good at sex, Otis,Copy !req
447. but that doesn't mean
I want to be seen in public with you.Copy !req
448. Well, I don't wanna be seen in public
with someone who is meanCopy !req
449. and uses people for their good sex skills!Copy !req
450. I have more self-respect than that.Copy !req
451. We're done.Copy !req
452. And we're not done. We're over!Copy !req
453. "Over" and "done" mean the same thing!Copy !req
454. I know, baby.Copy !req
455. Hi, this is Erin. Leave a message.Copy !req
456. Hi, Mum, it's Maeve.Copy !req
457. Listen, I know you're not speaking to me,
but I really think we should talk.Copy !req
458. Call me back?Copy !req
459. I miss you.Copy !req
460. Hey, Maeve.Copy !req
461. Can I talk to you about something?Copy !req
462. Yeah.Copy !req
463. What's wrong?Copy !req
464. Mum still isn't answering me.Copy !req
465. She hates me.Copy !req
466. You did the right thing,
and don't forget that.Copy !req
467. What do you wanna talk about?Copy !req
468. I wanted to talk about the…Copy !req
469. Um…Copy !req
470. I wanted to talk about…Copy !req
471. breakfast.Copy !req
472. - Raspberry or strawberry jam?Copy !req
473. Uh, raspberry.Copy !req
474. Well, good news, we've got neither.Copy !req
475. Mm. Very good, very good.
I'll be out in a second.Copy !req
476. Thanks so much
for coming in again, Jackson.Copy !req
477. I basically
just wanted to get to know you a bit,Copy !req
478. seeing as we'll be working
closely together.Copy !req
479. You know, I was once head girl here.Copy !req
480. I get the responsibility.Copy !req
481. Yeah, it's fun.Copy !req
482. And challenging, I hope.Copy !req
483. Hm.Copy !req
484. The thing is, I'm really wanting to inject
some proper passion back into this place.Copy !req
485. To create an environment
where everyone can excel,Copy !req
486. no matter what path
they choose to go down.Copy !req
487. Hope, the press are here
for your interview.Copy !req
488. Thank you. I'll be right there.Copy !req
489. I wanted to share with you
the new school values.Copy !req
490. I'm excited to hear your feedback
when you get a chance.Copy !req
491. Hi!Copy !req
492. Oh, and, Jackson,Copy !req
493. I'm going to need you to take this role
a bit more seriously than you have been.Copy !req
494. I'm not really into
the whole "cool guy" thingCopy !req
495. if you know what I mean.Copy !req
496. Not really.Copy !req
497. You will.Copy !req
498. She's nuts.Copy !req
499. - Cal, it's PE. Are you coming?
- Yeah, I'll be right there.Copy !req
500. - Whoa!
- Hey.Copy !req
501. - Oh. Oops.
- Whoa!Copy !req
502. I'm… Okay, I'm in your way, obviously.Copy !req
503. It's okay.Copy !req
504. After you, good human.Copy !req
505. - Hey.
- Hey.Copy !req
506. I don't like it when I hurt people.Copy !req
507. - Then don't.
- Yeah.Copy !req
508. I don't know why I do it. I just get soCopy !req
509. angry, but…Copy !req
510. I wanna change.Copy !req
511. Okay.Copy !req
512. You're a poofter now, Groff?Copy !req
513. Yeah, I am a bit of a poofter now.Copy !req
514. Is that all right with you?Copy !req
515. Yeah, mate. I think it's cool.Copy !req
516. Yeah, congrats, dude.Copy !req
517. You don't need to congratulate someone
on being gay.Copy !req
518. Okay. Width, length, flaccid, erect.Copy !req
519. Shit. It's not very big, is it?
Come on. Let's get you hard.Copy !req
520. Yeah!Copy !req
521. Come on!Copy !req
522. For the love of God! Come on!Copy !req
523. Come on!Copy !req
524. - Hello. Nice to meet you.
- And you.Copy !req
525. We were thinking, I don't know…Copy !req
526. Shit!Copy !req
527. Strange.Copy !req
528. I guess
it's lost property for you.Copy !req
529. Fuck.Copy !req
530. Dude, why are you naked?Copy !req
531. Don't look at my dick!Copy !req
532. Hey, Otis. Is it true that you
and Ruby are a thing now?Copy !req
533. No. No. Why did you say that?Copy !req
534. Everyone's talking about it.Copy !req
535. Sex King.Copy !req
536. So in the structure,
the double bond causes a kink in the tail.Copy !req
537. Uh-huh.Copy !req
538. So… Aimee Gibbs!Copy !req
539. Sir, I need to take Goat out for a wee.Copy !req
540. Right, fine. Go on.Copy !req
541. See, this is exactly why you shouldn't be
bringing livestock into school.Copy !req
542. - My mum's looking after her tomorrow.
- Good.Copy !req
543. Okay, this is the only goat
you should be seeing in school.Copy !req
544. Uh, it's a goatee.Copy !req
545. It's my new look. Hands up who likes it.Copy !req
546. Oh God. Oh God.Copy !req
547. Do a wee for Mummy.Copy !req
548. - What the f—Copy !req
549. Fatty acids!Copy !req
550. - Okay…
- Sir, Dex Thompson's naked!Copy !req
551. Oh my God! It's tiny!Copy !req
552. Look away!
I don't want you to see my dick!Copy !req
553. Fuck!Copy !req
554. Penis!Copy !req
555. What is happening? Tell me now!Copy !req
556. Why are you naked?Copy !req
557. Dex?Copy !req
558. I need to borrow this.
- No, not my goat. Not my goat.Copy !req
559. - I'll bring it back as soon as I can.
- Don't take her!Copy !req
560. - I'll bring it back.
- Please!Copy !req
561. - I'm sorry.
- Please!Copy !req
562. Goat!Copy !req
563. I would say I'm here to try
and bring back a sense of communityCopy !req
564. and family values that—Copy !req
565. Is that a dog?Copy !req
566. It's a fucking goat.
Film it, for Christ's sake!Copy !req
567. What were you saying about family values,
Headmistress?Copy !req
568. Would you just excuse me
just one moment? Thank you.Copy !req
569. No.Copy !req
570. No, no, no!Copy !req
571. No, no, no, no!Copy !req
572. I think I just lost all my work.Copy !req
573. Yeah, the computers are terrible.
Maybe get a laptop.Copy !req
574. - Hey. Hey, have you seen Kyle?
- No.Copy !req
575. I should never have listened
to the fucking Sex King!Copy !req
576. Dex, are you okay?Copy !req
577. I should never have listened
to the Sex King.Copy !req
578. Who's the Sex King?Copy !req
579. Kyle.Copy !req
580. Okay, okay, okay.Copy !req
581. Hey!Copy !req
582. Are you stalking me, woman?Copy !req
583. No! No, don't be ridiculous.Copy !req
584. I just happened to be driving by
this place where you work.Copy !req
585. You've driven past 15 times!Copy !req
586. I can see you out the window.Copy !req
587. What's going on?Copy !req
588. Can we talk?Copy !req
589. - If you stop being scary.Copy !req
590. Yes.Copy !req
591. - Are you stepping out?
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
592. Good.Copy !req
593. So, Dex,Copy !req
594. how did we get here?Copy !req
595. I was measuring my penis.Copy !req
596. Mm. I told him to do that.
So what're your stats, then?Copy !req
597. I was interrupted.Copy !req
598. And I don't wanna know.Copy !req
599. What if I do have a small penis,
and I can never please a woman?Copy !req
600. Maybe you can look at it for me
and tell me if it's small.Copy !req
601. - Yeah! Sure.
- No! No! No!Copy !req
602. No! No, nobody's inspecting anythingCopy !req
603. because penis size isn't important.Copy !req
604. Only guys with small dicks say that.Copy !req
605. Dex, you shouldn't compare
the size of your dick to anyone else's.Copy !req
606. It's irrelevant and unhelpful.Copy !req
607. You'd also be surprisedCopy !req
608. how many guys have insecurities
about the size of their penisCopy !req
609. and exaggerated views
as to what other male genitals look like.Copy !req
610. It's true. I wish mine was straighter.Copy !req
611. It sort of bends to the side a bit.Copy !req
612. It's… it's wonky, you know?Copy !req
613. It's not wonky.Copy !req
614. It's unique.Copy !req
615. Thanks, Milburn.Copy !req
616. That means a lot.Copy !req
617. Well, that's very touching.Copy !req
618. Dex, why did you say
you'll never please a woman?Copy !req
619. He can't make
his girlfriend come during sex.Copy !req
620. What kind of sex?Copy !req
621. You know, just normal fucking.Copy !req
622. Okay. Well, most women struggle
to orgasm from penetration alone.Copy !req
623. Really?
- Yeah.Copy !req
624. You heard of the clitoris?Copy !req
625. Sure.Copy !req
626. Might be time to get acquainted with it.
Ask your girlfriend what she likes.Copy !req
627. And remember that orgasm
doesn't have to be the main goal of sex.Copy !req
628. You can have funCopy !req
629. and be creative.Copy !req
630. Could you clarify?Copy !req
631. You have ten fingers and a tongue, Dex.Copy !req
632. Use your imagination.Copy !req
633. Wow.Copy !req
634. You guys are actually really good
at giving out sex advice.Copy !req
635. Maybe keep this on the down-low?
Could be bad for my business.Copy !req
636. Hey. I'm going to lost property,
but thanks for the help.Copy !req
637. Oh! And, hey, Otis,
I heard about you and Ruby.Copy !req
638. Don't know how
you pulled that off, but congrats.Copy !req
639. - You and Ruby are a thing.
Well, we're not anymore.Copy !req
640. We were for a bit,
but it was casual, you know?Copy !req
641. No feelings.Copy !req
642. No feelings. Sounds cool.Copy !req
643. Thanks for telling everyone, Kyle.Copy !req
644. Well, I didn't tell anyone.Copy !req
645. But now everyone knows
about you and Ruby,Copy !req
646. guess I can carry on being the Sex King.Copy !req
647. Au revoir, loser!Copy !req
648. It means
exactly the opposite of that, Kyle!Copy !req
649. I didn't know
whether I was going to keep it.Copy !req
650. I was confused, andCopy !req
651. I kept putting it off.Copy !req
652. Then I started writing my book.Copy !req
653. And I enjoyed every second of that,
and I got immersed.Copy !req
654. - How could you keep this from me?
- I wanted to tell you, I did.Copy !req
655. I— But the…Copy !req
656. the longer I waited, the harder it got.Copy !req
657. I'm having a baby?Copy !req
658. I don't want you to feel
backed into a corner.Copy !req
659. I have decided to keep this baby,Copy !req
660. and I feel empowered by that choice, and…Copy !req
661. I only need you to be involved if you feel
it's something that you would like.Copy !req
662. Do you want me to be involved?Copy !req
663. Of course I do.Copy !req
664. But only if you want to be involved.Copy !req
665. I have a scanCopy !req
666. tonight at 4:30.Copy !req
667. - At Moordale Community Hospital. You—
- Thank you.Copy !req
668. I really have to think about this.Copy !req
669. - Of course.
- Yeah.Copy !req
670. I would say I'm hereCopy !req
671. to bring back
a sense of community and family values.Copy !req
672. - What were you saying about family values?
- Come in.Copy !req
673. Would you just excuse me
just one moment? Thank you.Copy !req
674. The clinic is still running
in the old toilet block.Copy !req
675. Maeve and I have nothing to do with it,Copy !req
676. but it's still happening,
and it's dangerous.Copy !req
677. Students shouldn't be getting advice
from students,Copy !req
678. but they still need help,Copy !req
679. so hopefully, you can provide
the right service on campus.Copy !req
680. Thank you for telling me, Otis.Copy !req
681. Miss Sands, I did type up my essay,
but the school computer broke.Copy !req
682. - Can I get an extension?
- Okay. Don't let it happen again.Copy !req
683. Oh, uh, Maeve,
have a look at applying for that.Copy !req
684. You're the perfect candidate.Copy !req
685. Adam, I marked your test this afternoon.
Here's your timetable.Copy !req
686. Ah! What set are you in?Copy !req
687. Take a guess.Copy !req
688. Eric. Eric!
Everybody knows about me and Ruby.Copy !req
689. Did you tell anyone?Copy !req
690. I accidentally told Adam.Copy !req
691. And I told Ola.Copy !req
692. - I told Lily.
- And I told everyone.Copy !req
693. This was supposed to stay
between me and you!Copy !req
694. What are you doing here?Copy !req
695. I sold my first painting,
so no beans on toast for us tonight.Copy !req
696. We are going out for pizza!Copy !req
697. Oh, well done.
Always knew you would, genius.Copy !req
698. Apparently, you're secretly sleeping
with Otis Milburn.Copy !req
699. Ugh! As if.Copy !req
700. It's true.Copy !req
701. No, it's really not.
It's really not.Copy !req
702. Mum?Copy !req
703. Hi, how are you?Copy !req
704. Stop calling me.Copy !req
705. - We have a friendly relationship.
- Yeah, but not that friendly.Copy !req
706. I didn't come,
but that was so much better!Copy !req
707. So now everyone knows anyway,Copy !req
708. I was thinking
we could keep seeing each other?Copy !req
709. You know,
because I like having sex with you.Copy !req
710. No more cars or toilets?Copy !req
711. No, no more cars or toilets.Copy !req
712. - Thanks for the tip, Otis.
- Did you tell her to do this?Copy !req
713. It needed to end.Copy !req
714. So it's really done, then.Copy !req
715. Yeah, it really is.Copy !req